Children’s section, please! Ahhh, exhale! So nice to be finally sitting, and can’t wait for my cold ice tea and a non-diet meal. The city was sizzling hot, and we had been walking around for hours carrying the stroller up and down steps with Maddie in it, shopping bags and the baby “luggage” on our arms, and all the while, dogging the NYC sidewalk traffic. Phew!! So very nice to be sitting and relaxing in air conditioning at Patsy’s restaurant on the Upper East Side.
As a parent you know not to get too relaxed while dining out. Moments, and I mean only moments, after ordering our refreshing drinks, it started. We know what IT means, don’t we parents! Maddie was not pleased about a few things and was not afraid to “voice” herself. I want that fork, spoon, table bread, water, napkin, salt, pepper, crumb, whatever is on the table! My husband and I quickly went into routine mode and pushed everything to the far end of the table. No problem, we’ve got this. We were now enjoying our table bread at two arms reach across the table. Maddie, getting more antsy, tries to propel herself from the highchair onto the table. She was getting loud, winy, and at that point, everyone in the restaurant knew it! I tried to hold out, but couldn’t. I unfortunately had to go to the restroom leaving my poor husband alone to man the toddler wheel. Why do I feel guilty about having to go to the restroom? Everyone does it…it’s a human necessity. Oh, the life of a mommy…get in fast, get out fast! No time for primping. Still no problem, we’ve got this.
When I returned, 5 minutes later, I knew things just went from bad to worse! Madison was tossing the sugar packets into the air and onto the floor. I looked at Dean and he said, ‘let her…it’s making her happy.’ Apparently Madison had gone into a panic scream cry when I walked away and the waitress had to assist Dean in calming her. Oh my! Then the pizza came. Maddie wanted out of the highchair and there was no stopping her. I propped her on the bench seat, I was sitting on, and she started jumping and screeching as loud as she could, as the whole restaurant watched on, some joining in and participating. Come on now, people! Ok, problem, I don’t think we have this anymore. All I can think is, please stop antagonizing her…can’t you see I’m trying to get some control here! I propped my leg across the bench, so she would not fall as I tried to eat my pizza. Talk about muli-tasking! I’m not looking for peace or relaxation at this point, I just hope to eat. Eventually Maddie exhausted us, the patrons, and the servers. We INHALED our pizza and left the toddler-crime-scene!
Have you been in an awkward pubic situation and wanted to immediately dart away? Please tell me I am not alone!