Gory Booger (aka Spartacus), according to the Make-Believe Media, has introduced a Senate resolution that reportedly will “pave the way for reparations.” I have two questions: 1. Is Italy going to start paying ME reparations for the atrocities committed by the Romans upon the Germanic tribes? 2. Since all of my ancestors arrived in the United States long after slavery was abolished here, so I couldn’t have owned any, and if I’m forced to pay reparations for slavery, does that now entitle me to have a slave or two, and if so, can I claim them as dependents?