Whatever the situation, it can be hard to reconcile the person you love IRL with the manufactured persona they broadcast online.
In an article for The Cut, writer Hayley Phelan explains why this online/IRL split can be so hard to deal with, sharing the story of a friendship that went sideways after she discovered her BFF’s cringe-worthy social media presence.
When Phelan met her pal, the two hit it off instantly. Soon, though, she noticed that her friend’s Instagram posts felt insufferable.
"Over the next six months, things only got worse," she writes. "[She posted] nausea-inducing poses with her boyfriend that looked about as staged as a rom-com poster: laughing and eating soft-serve on a stoop, holding hands while walking over a bridge, stealing a kiss post-run."
Because of her friend’s irritating IG, Phelan let the friendship wither on the vine, finding she had no interest in spending time with her pal.
What was it about her bestie’s social mdia posts, though, and why did they feel so icky?
For Phelan and many of the subjects she interviewed for her piece, it’s the disconnect between the person you know IRL and the way they present themselves online that feels so unbearable.
"What your friend does on social media — so long as it does not involve your photo, handle or information directly — does not have anything to do with you. You have got to let her do her thing."
And frankly, we agree. Like Phelan, who reconnected with her friend after bumping into her IRL and remembering why the two hit it off in the first place, it’s more important to love your friends for who they are and judge them by how they treat others than it is to evaluate their worth based on their Instagram posts. It’s just social media, after all, and it’s safe to assume the person you know in real life is the real version of your friend.