poor Alice, who felt ready to sink into the earth. At last the Gryphon said to

the Mock Turtle, “Drive on, old fellow! Don’t be all day about

it!” and he went on in these words:


“Yes, we went to school in the sea, though you mayn’t believe

it—”


“I never said I didn’t!” interrupted Alice.


“You did,” said the Mock Turtle.


“Hold your tongue!” added the Gryphon, before Alice could speak

again. The Mock Turtle went on.


“We had the best of educations—in fact, we went to school every

day—”


“I’ve been to a day-school, too,” said Alice;

“you needn’t be so proud as all that.”


“With extras?” asked the Mock Turtle a little anxiously.


“Yes,” said Alice, “we learned French and music.”


“And washing?” said the Mock Turtle.


“Certainly not!” said Alice indignantly.


“Ah! then yours wasn’t a really good school,” said the Mock

Turtle in a tone of great relief. “Now at ours they had at the end

of the bill, ‘French, music, and

washing—extra.’”


“You couldn’t have wanted it much,” said Alice; “living

at the bottom of the sea.”


“I couldn’t afford to learn it.” said the Mock Turtle with a

sigh. “I only took the regular course.”


“What was that?” inquired Alice.


“Reeling and Writhing, of course, to begin with,” the Mock Turtle

replied; “and then the different branches of Arithmetic—Ambition,

Distraction, Uglification, and Derision.”


“I never heard of ‘Uglification,’” Alice ventured to

say. “What is it?”


The Gryphon lifted up both its paws in surprise. “What! Never heard of

uglifying!” it exclaimed. “You know what to beautify is, I

suppose?”


“Yes,” said Alice doubtfully: “it

means—to—make—anything—prettier.”


“Well, then,” the Gryphon went on, “if you don’t know

what to uglify is, you are a simpleton.”


Alice did not feel encouraged to ask any more questions about it, so she turned

to the Mock Turtle, and said “What else had you to learn?”