text: Me (going down to the basement to check the mousetraps): What are you going to do if there's a mouse just running around?
  
  Me: Umm... Yell.
  
  Me (hassling myself): Yell what?
  
  Me: Umm... "Get your ass in that trap"?
  
  I don't imagine this will actually work, but I feel better now that I have a plan.