Aging as a gift instead of a burden requires attitude change
When I saw the program Aging is the Only Way to Live at The Community House, I headed over. The title intrigued me: it seemed both banal and fresh.

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When I saw the program Aging is the Only Way to Live at The Community House, I headed over. The title intrigued me: it seemed both banal and fresh.

I absolutely agree that aging gets a bad rap in our culture, that our effort to appear youthful, to color our hair, smooth our wrinkles and feature fit physiques can be a full-time job. Some of us are obsessed with living longer and healthier, yet to be aged is not necessarily to be venerated and celebrated.

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Here are some of the things I found out. First, and most importantly, the program was part of the Active Adults offerings from The Community House, which offers quite a bit of programming to that group including a computer club, card groups, book clubs, trips and tours and other gatherings.

It also offers this regular monthly roundtable discussion held the fourth Wednesday of every month with coffee and doughnuts at 9:30 a.m. and a speaker or discussion at 10 a.m. The program I attended was one of those.

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The day I went, more than 20 people showed up ready to participate, and while they may not have all known one another they were welcoming and friendly. I sat with Tom Paulick of Oak Brook and Jim Gordon of Hinsdale. Kate Vogts, director of the Active Adults opened the talk.

Our speaker was Dr. Richard W. Bimler, a gentleman who had spent many years as a Lutheran minister, and who has three children and seven grandchildren. He also has written several books — maybe as many as 17 — including one entitled "Joyful Aging." He is also known as an "AHHA man," which stands for Ambassador of Health, Hope & Aging.

"It is always good to celebrate aging," he said, and here was a perspective the program gave me: aging is a gift. We all need to learn to "celebrate God's gift of aging." Death happens all around us, he said, and death is part of life. So, yes, while one day we will all die, today we can live.

Proclaiming his age as 77 and 1/12th, Bimler said our culture sees aging as a burden. He asked people in the room to share their ages: 77, 89, 93, 84, 74. There was a certain amount of pride in those numbers, but ask someone a little farther down the scale, and she might be more reticent about producing the number (ahem).

With our society aging rapidly — he estimated that 10,000 people were to turn 65 years old that day alone — we need to change our attitude about growing older. There are also numerous opportunities for various professions to serve those growing older. If aging is not a blessing, "Whatever your faith — if it is not a blessing, then where do you go with that?"

Another point I came away with was that it's not just the young who need to change their attitudes.

"Don't pretend everything is fine," Bimler said.

Some days your body aches, you don't move as quickly, some parts are deteriorating, but that doesn't mean there is no hope. Laugh. Laugh at yourself, take joy and pride in the process. Accept limitations with grace.

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Think about those people who mentored you, who impressed and affected you, and try and be that person in the lives of others, he advised.

Last, I liked Bimler's ideas about retirement. He doesn't call the "end" of one's career or profession "retirement." Rather, he calls that state "re-positioning." Those who have identified so closely and carefully with what they do may find the end of work hard, and may have to move to a new phase of life. We are human beings, he said, not human doings.

"I have been a do-er all my life," he said. "I gotta keep doing stuff." We have to learn to "be" for others. We don't always have to "do" for them.

Never in the history of the world have there been this many older adults. Bimler sees that as a blessing.

There is a certain amount of wisdom and joy in this population, and I hope we can capture it. Bimler referenced a Japanese saying to illustrate this point: The setting sun is no less beautiful than the rising sun.