Play Script - TextTwelfth Night

IntroductionThis section contains the script of Act 5 of Twelfth Night the play by William Shakespeare. The enduring works of William Shakespeare feature many famous and well loved characters. Make a note of any unusual words that you encounter whilst reading the script of Twelfth Night and check their definition in the Shakespeare Dictionary The script of Twelfth Night is extremely long. To reduce the time to load the script of the play, and for ease in accessing specific sections of the script, we have separated the text of Twelfth Night into Acts. Please click Twelfth Night Script to access further Acts.

Clown Marry, sir, they praise me and make an ass of me;now my foes tell me plainly I am an ass: so that bymy foes, sir I profit in the knowledge of myself,and by my friends, I am abused: so that,conclusions to be as kisses, if your four negativesmake your two affirmatives why then, the worse formy friends and the better for my foes.

DUKE ORSINO Why, this is excellent.

Clown By my troth, sir, no; though it please you to beone of my friends.

DUKE ORSINO Thou shalt not be the worse for me: there's gold.

Clown But that it would be double-dealing, sir, I wouldyou could make it another.

DUKE ORSINO Well, I will be so much a sinner, to be adouble-dealer: there's another.

Clown Primo, secundo, tertio, is a good play; and the oldsaying is, the third pays for all: the triplex,sir, is a good tripping measure; or the bells ofSaint Bennet, sir, may put you in mind; one, two, three.

DUKE ORSINO You can fool no more money out of me at this throw:if you will let your lady know I am here to speakwith her, and bring her along with you, it may awakemy bounty further.

Clown Marry, sir, lullaby to your bounty till I comeagain. I go, sir; but I would not have you to thinkthat my desire of having is the sin of covetousness:but, as you say, sir, let your bounty take a nap, Iwill awake it anon.

Exit

VIOLA Here comes the man, sir, that did rescue me.

Enter ANTONIO and Officers

DUKE ORSINO That face of his I do remember well;Yet, when I saw it last, it was besmear'dAs black as Vulcan in the smoke of war:A bawbling vessel was he captain of,For shallow draught and bulk unprizable;With which such scathful grapple did he makeWith the most noble bottom of our fleet,That very envy and the tongue of lossCried fame and honour on him. What's the matter?

First Officer Orsino, this is that AntonioThat took the Phoenix and her fraught from Candy;And this is he that did the Tiger board,When your young nephew Titus lost his leg:Here in the streets, desperate of shame and state,In private brabble did we apprehend him.

VIOLA He did me kindness, sir, drew on my side;But in conclusion put strange speech upon me:I know not what 'twas but distraction.

ANTONIO Orsino, noble sir,Be pleased that I shake off these names you give me:Antonio never yet was thief or pirate,Though I confess, on base and ground enough,Orsino's enemy. A witchcraft drew me hither:That most ingrateful boy there by your side,From the rude sea's enraged and foamy mouthDid I redeem; a wreck past hope he was:His life I gave him and did thereto addMy love, without retention or restraint,All his in dedication; for his sakeDid I expose myself, pure for his love,Into the danger of this adverse town;Drew to defend him when he was beset:Where being apprehended, his false cunning,Not meaning to partake with me in danger,Taught him to face me out of his acquaintance,And grew a twenty years removed thingWhile one would wink; denied me mine own purse,Which I had recommended to his useNot half an hour before.

VIOLA How can this be?

DUKE ORSINO When came he to this town?

ANTONIO To-day, my lord; and for three months before,No interim, not a minute's vacancy,Both day and night did we keep company.

Enter OLIVIA and Attendants

DUKE ORSINO Here comes the countess: now heaven walks on earth.But for thee, fellow; fellow, thy words are madness:Three months this youth hath tended upon me;But more of that anon. Take him aside.

OLIVIA What would my lord, but that he may not have,Wherein Olivia may seem serviceable?Cesario, you do not keep promise with me.

VIOLA Madam!

DUKE ORSINO Gracious Olivia,--

OLIVIA What do you say, Cesario? Good my lord,--

VIOLA My lord would speak; my duty hushes me.

OLIVIA If it be aught to the old tune, my lord,It is as fat and fulsome to mine earAs howling after music.

DUKE ORSINO Why should I not, had I the heart to do it,Like to the Egyptian thief at point of death,Kill what I love?--a savage jealousyThat sometimes savours nobly. But hear me this:Since you to non-regardance cast my faith,And that I partly know the instrumentThat screws me from my true place in your favour,Live you the marble-breasted tyrant still;But this your minion, whom I know you love,And whom, by heaven I swear, I tender dearly,Him will I tear out of that cruel eye,Where he sits crowned in his master's spite.Come, boy, with me; my thoughts are ripe in mischief:I'll sacrifice the lamb that I do love,To spite a raven's heart within a dove.

VIOLA And I, most jocund, apt and willingly,To do you rest, a thousand deaths would die.

OLIVIA Where goes Cesario?

VIOLA After him I loveMore than I love these eyes, more than my life,More, by all mores, than e'er I shall love wife.If I do feign, you witnesses abovePunish my life for tainting of my love!

OLIVIA Ay me, detested! how am I beguiled!

VIOLA Who does beguile you? who does do you wrong?

OLIVIA Hast thou forgot thyself? is it so long?Call forth the holy father.

DUKE ORSINO Come, away!

OLIVIA Whither, my lord? Cesario, husband, stay.

DUKE ORSINO Husband!

OLIVIA Ay, husband: can he that deny?

DUKE ORSINO Her husband, sirrah!

VIOLA No, my lord, not I.

OLIVIA Alas, it is the baseness of thy fearThat makes thee strangle thy propriety:Fear not, Cesario; take thy fortunes up;Be that thou know'st thou art, and then thou artAs great as that thou fear'st.

Enter Priest

O, welcome, father!Father, I charge thee, by thy reverence,Here to unfold, though lately we intendedTo keep in darkness what occasion nowReveals before 'tis ripe, what thou dost knowHath newly pass'd between this youth and me.

Priest A contract of eternal bond of love,Confirm'd by mutual joinder of your hands,Attested by the holy close of lips,Strengthen'd by interchangement of your rings;And all the ceremony of this compactSeal'd in my function, by my testimony:Since when, my watch hath told me, toward my graveI have travell'd but two hours.

DUKE ORSINO O thou dissembling cub! what wilt thou beWhen time hath sow'd a grizzle on thy case?Or will not else thy craft so quickly grow,That thine own trip shall be thine overthrow?Farewell, and take her; but direct thy feetWhere thou and I henceforth may never meet.

VIOLA My lord, I do protest--

OLIVIA O, do not swear!Hold little faith, though thou hast too much fear.

Enter SIR ANDREW

SIR ANDREW For the love of God, a surgeon! Send one presentlyto Sir Toby.

OLIVIA What's the matter?

SIR ANDREW He has broke my head across and has given Sir Tobya bloody coxcomb too: for the love of God, yourhelp! I had rather than forty pound I were at home.

OLIVIA Who has done this, Sir Andrew?

SIR ANDREW The count's gentleman, one Cesario: we took him fora coward, but he's the very devil incardinate.

DUKE ORSINO My gentleman, Cesario?

SIR ANDREW 'Od's lifelings, here he is! You broke my head fornothing; and that that I did, I was set on to do'tby Sir Toby.

VIOLA Why do you speak to me? I never hurt you:You drew your sword upon me without cause;But I bespoke you fair, and hurt you not.

SIR ANDREW If a bloody coxcomb be a hurt, you have hurt me: Ithink you set nothing by a bloody coxcomb.

Enter SIR TOBY BELCH and Clown

Here comes Sir Toby halting; you shall hear more:but if he had not been in drink, he would havetickled you othergates than he did.

SIR TOBY BELCH Then he's a rogue, and a passy measures panyn: Ihate a drunken rogue.

OLIVIA Away with him! Who hath made this havoc with them?

SIR ANDREW I'll help you, Sir Toby, because well be dressed together.

SIR TOBY BELCH Will you help? an ass-head and a coxcomb and aknave, a thin-faced knave, a gull!

OLIVIA Get him to bed, and let his hurt be look'd to.

Exeunt Clown, FABIAN, SIR TOBY BELCH, and SIR ANDREW

Enter SEBASTIAN

SEBASTIAN I am sorry, madam, I have hurt your kinsman:But, had it been the brother of my blood,I must have done no less with wit and safety.You throw a strange regard upon me, and by thatI do perceive it hath offended you:Pardon me, sweet one, even for the vowsWe made each other but so late ago.

DUKE ORSINO One face, one voice, one habit, and two persons,A natural perspective, that is and is not!

SEBASTIAN Antonio, O my dear Antonio!How have the hours rack'd and tortured me,Since I have lost thee!

ANTONIO Sebastian are you?

SEBASTIAN Fear'st thou that, Antonio?

ANTONIO How have you made division of yourself?An apple, cleft in two, is not more twinThan these two creatures. Which is Sebastian?

OLIVIA Most wonderful!

SEBASTIAN Do I stand there? I never had a brother;Nor can there be that deity in my nature,Of here and every where. I had a sister,Whom the blind waves and surges have devour'd.Of charity, what kin are you to me?What countryman? what name? what parentage?

VIOLA Of Messaline: Sebastian was my father;Such a Sebastian was my brother too,So went he suited to his watery tomb:If spirits can assume both form and suitYou come to fright us.

SEBASTIAN A spirit I am indeed;But am in that dimension grossly cladWhich from the womb I did participate.Were you a woman, as the rest goes even,I should my tears let fall upon your cheek,And say 'Thrice-welcome, drowned Viola!'

VIOLA My father had a mole upon his brow.

SEBASTIAN And so had mine.

VIOLA And died that day when Viola from her birthHad number'd thirteen years.

SEBASTIAN O, that record is lively in my soul!He finished indeed his mortal actThat day that made my sister thirteen years.

VIOLA If nothing lets to make us happy bothBut this my masculine usurp'd attire,Do not embrace me till each circumstanceOf place, time, fortune, do cohere and jumpThat I am Viola: which to confirm,I'll bring you to a captain in this town,Where lie my maiden weeds; by whose gentle helpI was preserved to serve this noble count.All the occurrence of my fortune sinceHath been between this lady and this lord.

SEBASTIAN [To OLIVIA] So comes it, lady, you have been mistook:But nature to her bias drew in that.You would have been contracted to a maid;Nor are you therein, by my life, deceived,You are betroth'd both to a maid and man.

DUKE ORSINO Be not amazed; right noble is his blood.If this be so, as yet the glass seems true,I shall have share in this most happy wreck.

To VIOLA

Boy, thou hast said to me a thousand timesThou never shouldst love woman like to me.

VIOLA And all those sayings will I overswear;And those swearings keep as true in soulAs doth that orbed continent the fireThat severs day from night.

Clown Truly, madam, he holds Belzebub at the staves's end aswell as a man in his case may do: has here writ aletter to you; I should have given't you to-daymorning, but as a madman's epistles are no gospels,so it skills not much when they are delivered.

OLIVIA Open't, and read it.

Clown Look then to be well edified when the fool deliversthe madman.

Reads

'By the Lord, madam,'--

OLIVIA How now! art thou mad?

Clown No, madam, I do but read madness: an your ladyshipwill have it as it ought to be, you must allow Vox.

OLIVIA Prithee, read i' thy right wits.

Clown So I do, madonna; but to read his right wits is toread thus: therefore perpend, my princess, and give ear.

OLIVIA Read it you, sirrah.

To FABIAN

FABIAN [Reads] 'By the Lord, madam, you wrong me, and theworld shall know it: though you have put me intodarkness and given your drunken cousin rule overme, yet have I the benefit of my senses as well asyour ladyship. I have your own letter that inducedme to the semblance I put on; with the which I doubtnot but to do myself much right, or you much shame.Think of me as you please. I leave my duty a littleunthought of and speak out of my injury.THE MADLY-USED MALVOLIO.'

OLIVIA Did he write this?

Clown Ay, madam.

DUKE ORSINO This savours not much of distraction.

OLIVIA See him deliver'd, Fabian; bring him hither.

Exit FABIAN

My lord so please you, these things furtherthought on,To think me as well a sister as a wife,One day shall crown the alliance on't, so please you,Here at my house and at my proper cost.

DUKE ORSINO Madam, I am most apt to embrace your offer.

To VIOLA

Your master quits you; and for your service done him,So much against the mettle of your sex,So far beneath your soft and tender breeding,And since you call'd me master for so long,Here is my hand: you shall from this time beYour master's mistress.

OLIVIA A sister! you are she.

Re-enter FABIAN, with MALVOLIO

DUKE ORSINO Is this the madman?

OLIVIA Ay, my lord, this same.How now, Malvolio!

MALVOLIO Madam, you have done me wrong,Notorious wrong.

OLIVIA Have I, Malvolio? no.

MALVOLIO Lady, you have. Pray you, peruse that letter.You must not now deny it is your hand:Write from it, if you can, in hand or phrase;Or say 'tis not your seal, nor your invention:You can say none of this: well, grant it thenAnd tell me, in the modesty of honour,Why you have given me such clear lights of favour,Bade me come smiling and cross-garter'd to you,To put on yellow stockings and to frownUpon Sir Toby and the lighter people;And, acting this in an obedient hope,Why have you suffer'd me to be imprison'd,Kept in a dark house, visited by the priest,And made the most notorious geck and gullThat e'er invention play'd on? tell me why.

OLIVIA Alas, Malvolio, this is not my writing,Though, I confess, much like the characterBut out of question 'tis Maria's hand.And now I do bethink me, it was sheFirst told me thou wast mad; then camest in smiling,And in such forms which here were presupposedUpon thee in the letter. Prithee, be content:This practise hath most shrewdly pass'd upon thee;But when we know the grounds and authors of it,Thou shalt be both the plaintiff and the judgeOf thine own cause.

FABIAN Good madam, hear me speak,And let no quarrel nor no brawl to comeTaint the condition of this present hour,Which I have wonder'd at. In hope it shall not,Most freely I confess, myself and TobySet this device against Malvolio here,Upon some stubborn and uncourteous partsWe had conceived against him: Maria writThe letter at Sir Toby's great importance;In recompense whereof he hath married her.How with a sportful malice it was follow'd,May rather pluck on laughter than revenge;If that the injuries be justly weigh'dThat have on both sides pass'd.

OLIVIA Alas, poor fool, how have they baffled thee!

Clown Why, 'some are born great, some achieve greatness,and some have greatness thrown upon them.' I wasone, sir, in this interlude; one Sir Topas, sir; butthat's all one. 'By the Lord, fool, I am not mad.'But do you remember? 'Madam, why laugh you at sucha barren rascal? an you smile not, he's gagged:'and thus the whirligig of time brings in his revenges.

MALVOLIO I'll be revenged on the whole pack of you.

Exit

OLIVIA He hath been most notoriously abused.

DUKE ORSINO Pursue him and entreat him to a peace:He hath not told us of the captain yet:When that is known and golden time convents,A solemn combination shall be madeOf our dear souls. Meantime, sweet sister,We will not part from hence. Cesario, come;For so you shall be, while you are a man;But when in other habits you are seen,Orsino's mistress and his fancy's queen.

Exeunt all, except Clown

Clown [Sings]When that I was and a little tiny boy,With hey, ho, the wind and the rain,A foolish thing was but a toy,For the rain it raineth every day.But when I came to man's estate,With hey, ho, & c.'Gainst knaves and thieves men shut their gate,For the rain, & c.But when I came, alas! to wive,With hey, ho, & c.By swaggering could I never thrive,For the rain, & c.But when I came unto my beds,With hey, ho, & c.With toss-pots still had drunken heads,For the rain, & c.A great while ago the world begun,With hey, ho, & c.But that's all one, our play is done,And we'll strive to please you every day.