



Produced by David Widger






THE REVOLT

A PLAY IN ONE ACT

BY ELLIS PARKER BUTLER

Author of "Pigs Is Pigs" etc.

Copyright, 1912, by Samuel French




CHARACTERS

GRANDMA GREGG--Founder of the Flushing Academy of Household Science for
Young Ladies.

PAULINE--Working out her tuition.

SUSAN JANE JONES--An Emissary of the American Ladies' Association for
the Promotion of Female Supremacy.

KATE--A student.

GRACE--A student.

EDITH--A student.

IDA--A student.

MAY--A student.

OTHER YOUNG LADY STUDENTS.

THE IDEAL HUSBAND--by himself.



SCENE.--The class room of Grandma Gregg's Academy of Household Science
for Young Ladies, at Flushing.


TIME.--Now or soon.




THE REVOLT

SCENE.--_The Class-room. A table. Chairs arranged in semi-circle; an
easy chair for Grandma Gregg. Screen in one corner. Chairs or couch upon
which to lay wraps and hats. Otherwise an ordinary room. Tea things on
the table._

(PAULINE, _center of stage, with pail, broom, dusting rag, scrubbing
brushes and mop, is discovered on hands and knees scrubbing. As curtain
rises she rises to her knees, throws scrubbing brush and soap into the
pail, gets up with difficulty and mops the floor. She is singing._)

PAULINE. (singing) "All alone, all alone, nobody here but me. All alone,
all alone, nobody here but me, All alone, all--" (_she stops mopping and
leans on the mop handle_) Here it is now two weeks I've been workin' out
my tuition in this Academy of Household Science for Young Ladies, and
'tis nothin' but scrub, scrub, mop, mop, sweep, sweep, from mornin' 'til
night! I see plenty of work, but none of that tuition has come my way
yet "Wanted," says the advertisement, "a young lady to work out her
tuition in an academy." It says that, "Grandma Gregg's Flushing Academy
of Household Science," it says, "fits the young ladies for to occupy
properly their positions at the heads of their homes," it says, "It
will be a fine thing for you, PAULINE," I says, "to be tuitioned in an
Academy," so I come, (_mops_) "We'll begin your lessons right away,"
says Grandma Gregg, "take th' scrub brush an' a pail of water an' some
soap an' scrub th' cellar." I've been scrubbin' ever since. I don't care
much for the higher education when there is so much scrub in it.
(_mops_)

(GRANDMA GREGG _enters_. PAULINE, _not seeing her, goes to table and
examines tea things, books, etc._)

GRANDMA GREGG. PAULINE!

PAULINE. (_beginning to mop hastily_) Yes'm!

GRANDMA. Don't forget your curtsey, PAULINE.

PAULINE. (_making a curtsey_) Good mornin', Grandma Gregg. I hope I see
you well to-day. (_changing her tone_) If it ain't askin' too much, mam,
when does my tuitioning begin? I've been scrubbin' for two weeks now,
from mornin' 'til night--

GRANDMA. Have you scrubbed the cellar, Pauline?

PAULINE. Yes'm.

GRANDMA. Don't forget your curtsey, PAULINE.

PAULINE. (_curtseying_) No'm. (_curtsey_) Yes'm. (_curtsey_)

GRANDMA. You have scrubbed the cellar?

PAULINE (_curtseying_) Yes'm.

GRANDMA. And the garret? And the first floor? And the second floor?

PAULINE, (_curtseying_) Yes'm.

GRANDMA. Very good, very good, Pauline. Then, when you have finished
scrubbing this class room, you may scrub the front porch and the stable.
Then it will be time to scrub the cellar again. You are doing very
nicely.

PAULINE. Yes'm, thank you, mam. (_curtsey_) But I was thinkin', mam,
maybe I could have a little more tuition, and a little less work. "Work
and tuition" was what the advertisement said, mam, an' I've seen nothin'
but the work yet.

GRANDMA. My dear child! My dear, sweet child! I don't understand you.
You have done no work yet.

PAULINE. (_looking at her dress and at pail and mop_) I've done no work?
I wonder, now, what I have been doin'!

GRANDMA. (_placidly_) You have been receiving your tuition. In this
academy the study of Household Science begins with the rudiments.
Scrubbing is one of the rudiments. As a new scholar you begin with the
rudiments, of course. And I must say you are doing very well. You are
making excellent progress. Apply yourself earnestly to your lessons and
in a short time you will be promoted to another class. (PAULINE _stands
with her mouth open as_ GRANDMA _talks. She seems to be stunned_) Let me
see you scrub, Pauline.

PAULINE. (_dropping on her knees and taking brush from pail_) Yes'm.

GRANDMA. Don't forget your curtsey, Pauline.

PAULINE. (_curtseying on her knees_) No'm (curtsey. She scrubs)

GRANDMA. Very good indeed! Very good indeed! You are progressing,
Pauline! You are progressing. Apply yourself faithfully to your lessons.
You may study awhile on the front porch now. And don't be afraid to use
your muscle.

PAULINE. (_gathers up her pail and mop, etc. At door she turns_) Good
morning, Grandma Gregg. (_curtseys_) (_aside_) Rudiment, is it? If I
haven't done any work yet, I wonder now what the work will be like.

GRANDMA. (_has dropped into her chair and taken up her knitting_)
Pauline.

PAULINE. Yes'm.

GRANDMA. Did you curtsey, Pauline?

PAULINE. No'm. (curtseys) But I will, (_curtseys_)

GRANDMA. Pauline, have the new Professors come yet? I have hired two new
Professors. A Professor of Husbandology, and a Professor of Rudiments.
They are very highly recommended.

PAULINE. Beg pardon mam