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 [Illustration: The Purple Cow!]

 Published by William Doxey, at the Sign of the Lark, San Francisco.

 Copyright.




The Lark Book I., Nos. 1-12, with Table of Contents and Press Comments;
bound in canvas, with a cover design (The Piping Faun) by Bruce Porter,
painted in three colors. Price, 3.00, post-paid.

 [Illustration: _THE LARK_
                _Book 1 Nos. 1-12_]


_NOTES ON THE BIRTH OF THE LARK_

_Boston Herald._--"The pictures and rhymes in _The Lark_ rank with
the most remarkable things done for children since the days of Mother
Goose."

_Boston Budget._--"_The Lark_ is a reaction against the decadent spirit.
It is blithe, happy, full of the joy of life and the Greek within us--a
herald of the dawn of the new century."

_Boston Commonwealth._--"Everything in _The Lark_ is clever--some, we
may be permitted to add, cleverer than the rest."

_New York Critic._--"The faddists have produced some extraordinary
things in the way of literature, but nothing more freakish has made its
appearance in the last half-century than _The Lark_."

_New York Tribune._--"It is perhaps one-fourth a monthly periodical and
three-fourths an escapade. _The Lark_ ought really to be called 'The
Goose.'"

_New York Herald._--"The current number of _The Lark_ is, if possible,
more curious, more quaint, more preposterously humorous, and more
original than its predecessors. It is entirely unlike any other
publication."

_Richmond Times._--"We do not understand upon what the editor of
_The Lark_ bases anticipation of interest and consequent demand."

_Philadelphia Times._--"The young men who publish _The Lark_ have ideas
of their own. _The Lark_ is smart and funny in a way quite its own, and
it is also capable of serious flights and of musical notes clear enough
to be heard across the continent."

_Cincinnati Commercial Gazette._--"The worst thing about it being that
it is all too brief."

_Jersey City Chronicle._--"Every line in it is well worth perusal."

_St. Paul Globe._--"_The Lark_ partakes of the prevalent temper of life
on the Pacific Coast, where the don't-care mood of the West takes an
especially sunny and cheerful turn, and life looks a bigger joke than
elsewhere in the Union."

_St. Louis Mirror._--"_The Lark_ continues to be odd and ridiculous. Its
humor is quite unlike any other humor ever seen in this country. There
are good men with good pens working on _The Lark_."

_Kansas City Star._--"_The Lark_ seems to have attained a distinction
hitherto considered impossible in the unconventional. It seems really
original. It succeeds in holding in captivity the unexpected."

_Los Angeles: The Land of Sunshine._--"It is unlike anything nearer to
hand than 'Alice in Wonderland.'"


#Lark Posters.#--The full set of Eight Posters for THE LARK will be sent
post-paid for $2.00. The Lark Posters are printed from wooden blocks,
all but the first two having been cut by the artist.

 May,  1895   _The Piping Faun_     Bruce Porter
 Aug., 1895   _Mother and Child_    Florence Lundborg
 Nov., 1895   _Mt. Tamalpais_       Florence Lundborg
 Feb., 1896   _Robin Hood_          Florence Lundborg
 May,  1896   _The Oread_           Florence Lundborg
 Aug., 1896   _Pan Pipes_           Florence Lundborg
 Nov., 1896   _Redwood_             Florence Lundborg
 Feb., 1897   _Sunrise_             Florence Lundborg


_Published by_ WM. DOXEY, _at the Sign of the Lark, San Francisco._




CONTENTS

DEDICATION.


  1. A LEGEND, Rare and Superfine,
     Cribbed, some will say, from FRANKENSTEIN,
     (It _is_ a little in that line).

  2. MY FEET; a Memoir, with a Phase
     Resembling some Equestrian Ways.

  3. TH' INVISIBLE BRIDGE; a sort of Fable,--
     Please understand, if you're able.

  4. THE RUNAWAY TRAIN; a weird Creation
     Of Fancy and Imagination,
     Meant for the Rising Generation.

  5. On CITY FLORA, semi-culled
     By one whose Fame was somewhat dulled.

  6. ASTONISHMENT; depicting how
     Peculiar is the Verdant Bough.

  7. The PURPLE COW'S projected Feast;
     Reflections on a Mythic Beast
     That's quite Remarkable, at least.

  8. MY HOUSE, and how I make MY BED;
     A Nocturne for a Sleepy-Head.

  9. On DIGITAL EXTREMITIES;
     A Poem (and a gem it is!)

 10. THE GOOP; constructed on a Plan
     Beyond the Intellect of Man.

 11. PARISIAN NECTAR for the Gods;
     A little thick--but what's the odds?

 12. THE FLYING HOUSE; a Narrative
     Of Sanity comparative,
     And nothing much declarative.
             (_Permission of S. F. Examiner._)

 13. The Story of the GIANT HORSE;
     'T is quite improbable, of course.

 14. _WHAT_ SMITH _TRIED TO_ BELIEVE; a Study
     That will appeal to anybuddy.

 15. The TOWEL AND THE DOOR,--ah well!
     I'll not attempt the Tale to tell.

 16. The TOWEL AND THE DOOR again!
     The Story's told--is it in vain?

 17. The FOOTLESS FEAT of Mrs. Box
     _Posteaque, fiat Nox!_

 18. And now, allow the PURPLE COW
     To make her Bow.




 TO THE
 READERS OF "_THE LARK_"
 WHO HAVE LAUGHED
 THEY KNEW NOT WHY,
 THESE INARTISTIC ABERRATIONS
 ARE GRATEFULLY DEDICATED.
                  GELETT BURGESS




_THE PECULIAR HISTORY OF THE CHEWING-GUM MAN._


    O Willie, an' Wallie, an' Huldy Ann,
    They went an' built a big CHEWIN'-GUM MAN:
    It was none o' your teenty little dots,
    With pinhole eyes an' pencil-spots;
    But this was a terribul big one--well,
    'T was a'most as high as the Palace Hotel!
    _It took 'em a year to chew the gum!!_
    And Willie he done it all, 'cept some
    That Huldy got her ma to chew,
    By the time the head was ready to do.

       *       *       *       *       *

    Well, Willie he chewed it for days 'n' days;
    They brung it to him in gret big drays;
    An' fast as he got it good an' soft,
    Then Wallie he come and carried it oft.
    Then he'd roll it into a gret big ball,
    _An' he made a-more'n a MILLION in all!_
    Then Huldy Ann she spanked 'em flat
    An' pinched an' poked, an' the like o' that,
    Till she got it inter a gret big hunk--
    My! didn't Huldy have the spunk!
    And then she sliced one end half-way
    To make the laigs ('cause they never stay
    When you stick 'em on in a seprit piece--
    Seems like the ends was made o' grease);
    And she slit an arm right up each side,--
    I couldn't a done it if I'd a tried!
    O' course, her brothers they helped her, though,
    An' rolled the arms an' laigs out, so
    They all was smooth with roundin' bends
    An' _chopped_ the fingers inter the ends!
    An' when their mother had chewn the head,
    She went an' _stuck_ it on, instead!

    An' then,