



Produced by David Widger




CAPTAINS ALL

By W.W. Jacobs



THE NEST EGG

[Illustration: "The Nest Egg."]

"Artfulness," said the night-watch-man, smoking placidly, "is a gift; but
it don't pay always.  I've met some artful ones in my time--plenty of
'em; but I can't truthfully say as 'ow any of them was the better for
meeting me."

He rose slowly from the packing-case on which he had been sitting and,
stamping down the point of a rusty nail with his heel, resumed his seat,
remarking that he had endured it for some time under the impression that
it was only a splinter.

"I've surprised more than one in my time," he continued, slowly.  "When I
met one of these 'ere artful ones I used fust of all to pretend to be
more stupid than wot I really am."

He stopped and stared fixedly.

"More stupid than I looked," he said.  He stopped again.

"More stupid than wot they thought I looked," he said, speaking with
marked deliberation.  And I'd let 'em go on and on until I thought I had
'ad about enough, and then turn round on 'em.  Nobody ever got the better
o' me except my wife, and that was only before we was married.  Two
nights arterwards she found a fish-hook in my trouser-pocket, and arter
that I could ha' left untold gold there--if I'd ha' had it.  It spoilt
wot some people call the honey-moon, but it paid in the long run.

One o' the worst things a man can do is to take up artfulness all of a
sudden.  I never knew it to answer yet, and I