



Produced by Paul Haxo from a copy generously made available
by the University of California, Davis.





A
DAY WELL SPENT:
_A Farce_,
IN ONE ACT.

BY
JOHN OXENFORD,

MEMBER OF THE "DRAMATIC AUTHOR'S SOCIETY;"

AUTHOR OF
"MY FELLOW CLERK," "I AND MY DOUBLE," "THE DICE OF DEATH,"
"TWICE KILLED," ETC.

FIRST PERFORMED AT THE
THEATRE ROYAL, ENGLISH OPERA HOUSE,
_APRIL_ 4_th_, 1835.

LONDON:
JOHN MILLER, HENRIETTA STREET,
COVENT GARDEN.

1836.




LONDON:
T. C. SAVILL, PRINTER, ST. MARTIN'S LANE,
CHARING CROSS.




TO

B. WRENCH, ESQ.

MY DEAR SIR,

It is with the greatest pleasure, I dedicate to you a Farce, the
success of which is so much to be attributed to your exertions. Accept
my most hearty thanks for your inimitable performance of the principal
character in this piece, as well as for the kind attention you have
paid to my previous productions, and the pains you have taken to
render them acceptable to the public.

I remain, dear Sir,

Yours very truly,

JOHN OXENFORD.

16, John Street, Bedford Row.




DRAMATIS PERSONÆ.

Mr. Cotton (_an eminent hosier, and old gentleman_)  MR. BENNETT.

Bolt (_his foreman, quite a gentleman_)              MR. WRENCH.

Mizzle (_his apprentice, wishing to be a gentleman_) MR. OXBERRY.

Mr. Cutaway (_an adventurous gentleman_)             MR. HEMMING.

Sam Newgate (_no gentleman_)                         MR. ROMER.

Peter Prig (_an ex-foreman, likewise no gentleman_)  MR. SANDERS.

Coachman                                             MR. IRELAND.

Waiter                                               MR. LEWIS.


Miss Harriet Cotton (_an adventurous lady_)          MISS SHAW.

Mrs. Stitchley (_an old lady_)                       MRS. EMDEN.

Miss Brown (_her bosom friend--a middle-aged lady_)  MRS. F. MATTHEWS.

Mrs. Chargely (_a beneficent lady_)                  MISS ROBINSON.

Bridget (_a lady's lady_)                            MISS JACKSON.




A DAY WELL SPENT.

SCENE I.

_A Room in COTTON'S house;--an open door in C. flat._

_Enter COTTON, with a letter._

COT. Provoking! to leave my shop all day for the sake of calling on
this old Wealthington!--that I should be required to call on him!--not
but he is a rich relation, and I have great expectations from him; and
my foreman, Bolt, and apprentice Mizzle, are quite fit persons with
whom to entrust my shop. Egad, to make all the naughty apprentices
look on those two young men would be as good a lesson as going to see
George Barnwell on a boxing night!

_Enter CUTAWAY, C. D._

CUT. Hollo! no one in the shop! ha, ha!--(_Aside._) Hum, she's not
here.--Have you anything to sell, old gentleman?

COT. Of course I have; what do you think I keep a shop for?

CUT. Ha, ha! right! to be sure--what the devil else _should_ you keep a
shop for?

COT. (_Aside._) Puppy!

CUT. But, old gentleman! a young lady used to serve in that shop--she
is not ill, I hope?

COT. No, sir; on the contrary, my daughter is quite well.--Can I do
anything for you in the way of business?

CUT. (_Aside._) Oh! this must be the old father she talks about.--Ha!
you are the commander-in-chief of this concern, hey?

COT. Probably I am, Mr. Cutaway.

CUT. Cutaway! you know me, then? What a thing it is to be famous! Know
me, and yet you were never introduced to me, to my knowledge.

COT. Oh dear no; I used to see you through the glass door of my
parlour, and I intercepted certain letters to my daughter. I saw your
name, and I inquired into your connexion,--and saw no reason why I
should not--cut the connexion.

CUT. Very cutting, indeed. He's a sharp blade. Ha, ha! droll! funny!
ha, ha!

COT. Happy to find I