I am convinced that anyone who gives Ha Long Bay more than three stars hasn't eaten really exceptional Vietnamese & Thai (which are both easier to find exceptionally done in bigger, more diverse cities). I like Ha Long Bay and eat there frequently, largely due to proximity and lack of other options, but it is not four-star (or five!) worthy. \n\nUpsides: \n\n-When dishes are good here, they are very good. The best dish I've had so far is the \"LS7 Nem Khao Tod: Crispy rice with minced sour sausage, chicken, onion, cilantro, mint, lime juice, topped with peanuts, served with lettuce for wrapping,\" which I eat rarely because I have to take an ethical meat time-out.\n\n-The only other place to get decent Pho is on the west side, by the mall. When I am chilled to the bone and want Pho, this is the place to go for it. I am sort of a chicken addict, but I still think that the chicken is the best Pho at Ha Long Bay, even though it isn't traditional. \n\n-The staff is generally friendly, and they have to be, because it's a zoo in this restaurant most of the time.\n\nDownsides:\n\n-When dishes are bad, they are very, very, bad. Bland & tasteless, as many of the reviewers have pointed out. The drunken noodles are not good, for example, and neither is the Pad Thai, and these are two dishes that should be easy to make flavorful.\n\n-Sometimes, Ha Long Bay gets overwhelmed by the volume and food takes a long time. I've seen several people melt down when waiting for take out. \n\n-Ha Long Bay falls into the same sphere as many restaurants in Madison that think that to make food hot, it is acceptable to toss a full bottle of crushed red pepper into a dish 2 minutes before serving it. This is also the only way to get food spicy at Ha Long Bay (but, again, getting hot food in Madison is impossible, unless you go to Vientiane Palace). \n\n-The music is sometimes so bad that it's hard to concentrate on eating. Think oriental elevator folk music with strings.
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