Paid 39 quid for the 5* club for my old appliance to be removed and on delivery you guessed it... "Ohh this old machine isn't down for a collection", lots of head scratching followed..
The app was good I watched my washing machine travelling the county from seaside to vast inland areas of the Forest of Bowlands fells and vistas of outstanding natural beauty, slowed only buy car loads of Honda driving pensioners ambling wistfully along the country lanes in search of overpriced tearooms with operational defibrillators and toilet facilities where the octogenarian back seat passengers can empty their colostomy bags unhindered by mothers with small children, the sort of trip once booked on a shearings coach before the Milltown pensioners could afford their very own vehicular transport that could venture up the M6 without overheating and breaking down with steam escaping like a Fred Dibnah Road Roller .. Very entertaining app on a wet boring Sunday but I'm sure the washing machine (Brian as we now call him) enjoyed it, all very perilous sharing a road with bespectacled Honda Jazz drivers peering over their steering wheels like 10 year olds sat on dad's knee having their first drive of dad's car on the local supermarket car park. ..but he (Brian) survived the journey in fine fettle with little damage to his polystyrene crash helmet .
We love our Brian, a fine machine a technological marvel compared to our old washboard and lump of carbolic soap.
I suspect Brian was a little traumatised by the whole experience as during his first wash he was shaking during the spin cycle, perhaps it brought back memories of his mystery tour when I suggested he have a spin round.. He's settled now and enjoying every minute of his laundering duties, Brian has landed on his feet and once his feet were adjusted he settled in fine, with no further complaint.
The online ordering process was a cinch, with Mr Googles finest recommended products on a virtual shelf of veritable washing machine porn laid bare with not one piece of clothing in sight.
The right product was delivered on the specified day another technical marvel not a single human in sight until then, I meet many humans and not many are worth seeing twice.
The speed at which the telesales aftercare guy, I'll call him Rocket Ronnie was on to me at nothing short of supersonic, that boy must have the fastest dialup since Busby got his Ology, trying to persuade me that Brian was manufactured with one foot in the grave, and the other in my bank balance!
Great service if it wasn't for the 5* debacle costing me 39 quid in stead of 20.
I feel as disgruntled as a well known ginger bearded Prince following a domestic altercation over a dog bowl .. And like the bearded Prince, Brian's origins are not fully known with questionable ancestry and unsure of his DNA, Like said bearded Prince, we're not afraid to spill the beans and vent our spleens (I'm available for book deals, Netflix dramas, after dinner speeches and bar mitzvah Brian has become more reclusive and now hides under the kitchen worktop ) .. #Spare.
The delivery chaps were chirpy and pleasant with only 64 hours of their day to complete, not a complaint from them or me, their parents should be proud of their offsprings customer service.
All in all a very pleasant experience, but my pocket will feel forever £19 light.
I can't comment on the Air Fryer I was looking at buying as Mr AO is out of stock.
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