George Clooney‘s lawyer wife Amal has a newfound Hollywood headache: Kim Kardashian‘s calling, offering her services as a legal assistant! 
 
 The respected London attorney — who married the debonair A-lister last September — is dodging Kardashian’s messages, while working on a landmark human rights case in which she’s seeking to overturn the denial of the early 20th century Armenian genocide. 
 
 The 34-year-old reality TV queen has been outspoken about her Armenian heritage, recently announcing that she’s making her first pilgrimage this spring to the ancestral homeland of her late father (and O.J. Simpson “dream team” attorney) Robert Kardashian. 
 
 PHOTOS: Kim Kardashian’s 100 Most Naked Photos Ever 
 
 “Kim has been telling friends that she has plans to do lots of humanitarian work this year,” a source told The National ENQUIRER. “She wants to follow in the footsteps of Angelina Jolie,” who famously transformed from a drug-using Hollywood wild child to a respected United Nations Humanitarian. 
 
 The goal-driven socialite “has been calling George’s handlers, pleading for an introduction to Amal,” and “also emailed Amal’s London law office hoping to track her down,” the source told The ENQUIRER. “Despite that Kim doesn’t have a law degree — or even a college degree — she wants Amal to hire her as a consultant on the Armenia case.” 
 
 Amal, however, recently endured several snide comparisons to Kardashian, with the Lebanon-born bride mocked for her glamorous fashion sense and a carefully-choreographed Italian wedding to her movie star husband. 
 
 PHOTOS: The Kardashians’ 20 Most Cringe-Worthy Sex Confessions 
 
 “Kim is eager to smarten up her image: She’s planning on visiting refugees from Syria when she goes to Armenia, and she’s trying to convince Amal that teaming up is a win/win for both of them,” the insider told The ENQUIRER. 
 
 For more exclusive details about how the Clooneys are handling Kim’s advances — including Amal’s decision about employing the reality star — pick up the latest issue of The National ENQUIRER on newsstands Wednesday. 

 “I have so many friends who don’t wear makeup and hardly ever do their hair. I feel really blessed because I genuinely love the process of getting my hair and makeup done. Even beyond that, I just love to take care of my skin. I’m always researching different products, and I always try so many different things. I don’t just stick to one face wash or moisturizer. 
 
 I always need a makeup wipe. I find that I can’t really take my makeup off without it. I use the Neutrogena Make-Up Remover Cleansing Towelettes. They take off everything but really gently—even mascara! I used to just go on a flight, fall asleep in my makeup, and not care. Now I really wash it off—first with a wipe, and then I use the By Terry Pureté de Rose Refreshing Cleansing Gel because it smells like rose. I actually love that scent for everything. My fragrance right now is rose, and all of the scents in our Kardashian Beauty and Kardashian Beauty Hair lines are rose. 
 
 My skin is more on the dry side, so I need a really thick moisturizer all the time. I love Guerlain Orchidée Impériale The Rich Cream because I love the scent and the rich creaminess. There’s also one that’s from Natura Bissē—the C+C Vitamin Cream. It smells really strongly of orange, and I think it’s nice every once in a while. I went to this one facialist in New York, Tracie Martyn, and she has one moisturizer called Shakti Resculpting Body Cream, which is rose-scented, so of course I love it. I’m also really big on rose oils. Epicuren Bulgarian Rose Otto is a really good one. 
 
 For face sunscreen, I have two. One is La Mer's The Broad Spectrum SPF 50 UV Protecting Fluid. They make the best sunscreen because it’s really thick and not white. It’s SPF 50 but really sheer—I love it. My other one is from my dermatologist, Dr. Harold Lancer—his Sheer Fluid Sun Shield SPF 30. I think people either like him or think he’s too harsh, but I like that about him. He always tells me if I’m acting crazy when I’m like, ‘What laser has come out?’ [Laughs] I’m really big on laser facials. I have this at-home LED light therapy machine called Quasar MD Plus that I got it for my psoriasis because I’ll try anything. I used to have it so bad on the back of my legs. I had a lingerie photoshoot once, and it was just covering my legs. I have the behind-the-scenes pictures, and it’s pretty crazy. Now I just have two patches that won’t seem to go away, but the rest have gone away ever since I had the baby. 
 
 I obviously love it when I get my makeup done, but I’m pretty good at doing it myself. If you were to look at my makeup bag right now, it has a little MAC 182 Buffer Brush, and there’s also a bigger kabuki brush that I have to find on eBay because it covers my psoriasis really well—those are the best, and I apply my foundation with those. I love Armani Luminous Silk Foundation and Joe Blasco Ultrabase Foundation—it’s a really old school, heavy foundation. My dad got me makeup classes for Christmas when I was like 14 at some Joe Blasco makeup school, and I’ve worn that foundation ever since. 
 
 There's also always a matte bronzer in there. I love our Kardashian Beauty Endless Summer Matte Bronzer in Cabana Bronze. I always contour my nose, and I love to contour my cheeks—the Anastasia Beverly Hills Contour Kit is great for that. For mascara, I think Lancôme makes the best mascaras. Lancôme Définicils High Definition Mascara is my favorite. I wear false lashes during the day sometimes, and our line actually has some of the best false lashes—our glam team can tell you. Our Individualist Lashes are really good. 
 
 I look so different when I have my eyebrows done. Anastasia Soare [of Anastasia Beverly Hills] does my brows. For two years she was asking me if she could do them, and I was like, ‘No, I don’t need it,’ because I would just do it myself. But then I let her, and it changed my life—my whole face looked different. I used to make them really square in the middle, and she rounded them a little bit. Different makeup artists make you look totally different, too. Mario [Dedivanovic] makes me look the most ethnic. Joyce Bonelli makes me look the most glam. This one makeup artist, Rob Scheppy, makes me feel in-between glam and myself. He does me really tan—I can’t explain it. [Laughs] Everyone has a style, and I like the different vibes. 
 
 For my hair, I don’t wash it every day. We start out with a blowout on day one, then we go into a messier vibe the next day, and then we flat iron it and do a really sleek look on day three since that requires a little oil in the hair. Day four could be a slicked-back ponytail, and on the fifth day is when you wash it. That’s a little excessive, maybe. [Laughs]” 
 
 —as told to ITG 
 
 Kim Kardashian photographed by Emily Weiss in Los Angeles. 
 
 Read more from Khloé Kardashian, Kourtney Kardashian and Kendall Jenner. And if it's eyebrow advice you're in search of, look no further. 

 Kim Kardashian catalogued her makeup routine for Into the Gloss. This list doesn't feature any products infused with oil from the skin of a pregnant elephant, but there is a $455 Guerlain moisturizer with "a texture that is rich yet generous, melting and impalpable." Here's how much all of it cost. 
 
 The total (based on the purchase information provided by Into the Gloss): $1,977.75. 
 
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 It's completely obtainable if you're down to sacrifice a month's rent in NYC (equal to five months rent in Atlanta) for plump lips and skin as soft as an infant. Makes sense, considering how much us common folk spend on products. Still, $455 on one thing is silly. 
 
 All the products used in Kim's facial routine, including requisite plugs for the Kardashian Beauty line: 
 
 Neutrogena Make-Up Remover Cleansing Towelettes ($1.83) 
 
 By Terry Pureté de Rose Refreshing Cleansing Gel ($52) 
 
 Guerlain Orchidée Impériale The Rich Cream ($455) 
 
 NaturaBissē C+C Vitamin Cream ($115) 
 
 Shakti Resculpting Body Cream ($155) 
 
 Epicuren Bulgarian Rose Otto ($42.95) 
 
 La Mer's The Broad Spectrum SPF 50 UV Protecting Fluid ($85) 
 
 Dr. Harold Lancer Sheer Fluid Sun Shield SPF 30 ($48) 
 
 Quasar MD Plus (LED light therapy) ($795) 
 
 MAC 182 Buffer Brush ($53) 
 
 Armani Luminous Silk Foundation ($62) 
 
 Joe Blasco Ultrabase Foundation (19.50) 
 
 Kardashian Beauty Endless Summer Matte Bronzer ($14.99) 
 
 Anastasia Beverly Hills Contour Kit ($40) 
 
 Lancôme Définicils High Definition Mascara ($27.50) 
 
 Individualist Lashes ($10.98) 
 
 Kim also said she calls on a variety of makeup artists depending on when she's feeling "ethnic" or "glam": 
 
 "Different makeup artists make you look totally different, too. Mario [Dedivanovic] makes me look the most ethnic. Joyce Bonelli makes me look the most glam. This one makeup artist, Rob Scheppy, makes me feel in-between glam and myself. He does me really tan—I can't explain it. [Laughs] Everyone has a style, and I like the different vibes." 
 
 Sometimes you feel black; sometimes you don't. As for hair, Kim only washes it every five days, which is a lot like my routine: 
 
 "For my hair, I don't wash it every day. We start out with a blowout on day one, then we go into a messier vibe the next day, and then we flat iron it and do a really sleek look on day three since that requires a little oil in the hair. Day four could be a slicked-back ponytail, and on the fifth day is when you wash it. That's a little excessive, maybe. [Laughs]." 
 
 Maybe. 
 
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– Kim Kardashian was kind enough to run down her beauty routine, in great detail, for Into the Gloss—and Jezebel blogger Clover Hope was then kind enough to add up the prices of all the products Kim mentioned. The grand total? $1,977.75. It's not clear how often Kim might have to put out that much money—it includes products that, of course, presumably last her a while. Still, some of the findings are pretty awe-inspiring: "My skin is more on the dry side, so I need a really thick moisturizer all the time," Kim reveals in one section. "I love Guerlain Orchidée Impériale The Rich Cream because I love the scent and the rich creaminess." The cost? $455 for a 1.7-ounce bottle. She also recommends Tracie Martyn's Shakti Resculpting Body Cream, which will set you back $155 for a 200ml bottle, and she says Natura Bisse's C+C Vitamin Cream ($115 for a 2.5-ounce bottle) "smells really strongly of orange, and I think it’s nice every once in a while." But if none of the above is within your price range, at least you can likely afford her preferred cleansing towelettes, which cost just $1.83 for a pack of seven. Of course, none of this will do you any good if you don't share Kim's taste in upkeep: "I have so many friends who don’t wear makeup and hardly ever do their hair," she opines. "I feel really blessed because I genuinely love the process of getting my hair and makeup done." (In more Kim news, she apparently wants to be Amal Clooney's legal assistant.)