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Parenting in the Age of Trump
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On February 28th, 2017, EmbraceRace Co-founders Andrew Grant-Thomas and Melissa Giraud, along with participating EmbraceRace community members, had an illuminating conversation with our special guest, child psychologist Dr. Allison Briscoe-Smith. You can LISTEN to the conversation or read the transcript below.
EmbraceRace: Hi folks. If you've been with us before you know Allison already. She's a child psychologist specializing in trauma and ethnic minority mental health. She's a professor at the Wright Institute in San Francisco and she identifies as black. She and her partner have two multi-racial children who are black, white and Latino. Allison, it's great to talk to you again.
Allison: Great to talk to you both and with everybody.
"Broad principles that guide your work as a mom and a child therapist?"
EmbraceRace: I want to start with a broad question, Allison, and probably an unfair one.
When people registered for the call, we invited them to ask their questions. Many did. And we have all sorts of questions — about fostering resilience in our kids and ensuring that bigotry doesn't take hold in those children; questions of privilege and how we engage what's happening from a position of privilege; how we maintain hope and safety through all of it. And we're going to get to some of those questions.
I wanted to start by asking if you have any overarching bits of wisdom to offer. One or two broad principles that guide you in your work as a mom and your practice as a child therapist?
Allison: When I think about principles or approaches to this conversation, I draw upon my experience as a clinician, as a mom, but also from the wisdom that I've learned from all the families that I've been able to interact with. Families like those that are on the call tonight.
What I've learned from them and from my work is, first, that we should begin by self-reflection. Paying attention to who we are, how we think about these issues, how we learned about them, and what we think about them. We've got to get really clear with who we are.
Second, we've really got to know our kids. I know there's lots of questions about how we talk to a 4 year-old or a 16 year-old or a 13 year-old. But above all we must remember to think: who is my child? Not only in terms of age, but in terms of temperament, in terms of context.
The other part to pay attention to is all of these conversations about privilege and justice and resistance happen in a context and that context is our family values.
Who are we trying to raise? Who are we trying to be as a family?
It's important that we are clear on who we are, who are kids are, and also who are we trying to create and be as a family. And that is the template for trying to address some of these questions. Doing the deep thinking on each of those levels.
Dr. Allison Briscoe-Smith
EmbraceRace: We had a lot of questions about developmental appropriateness. Do you speak to a 3 year-old or a 5 year-old or even 18 month-old about these hard issues? And if so, how do you do that? I wonder if you can elaborate a little bit on how we might think about that as parents dealing with all different aged kids?
Allison: Sure. It's important to pay attention to development and developmental capacity. And you don't have to be a developmentalist or a social psychologist to figure that out.What is your child really capable of? How are they asking questions? How are they making sense of things and what are they bringing to you? There are ways for us to think about attending to those issues. I also often get questions in the context that you mentioned about young children.
People say, you know, I couldn't possibly start talking to my three year-old about race, she's too young. But I really want us to think about how we are actually every moment of every day teaching about race.
"How to shelter my child from the hate that is directed at our Muslim community?"
EmbraceRace: Let's go to your questions. Go ahead, Nabeela.
Nabeela: I'm just wondering, how do I shelter my child from the hate that is directed at our Muslim Pakistani community by virtue of our background? It's become acceptable to discriminate. How can we shelter our children so that they don't have to be concerned about these things and do normal things that other kids do?
EmbraceRace: Nabeela, I'm so sorry you have to even be asking this question. Can you say a little bit about what you're seeing, what you're feeling?
Nabeela: Well, you know, there's discrimination at all levels. There's the not-so-subtle discrimination that we see at the policy level where you've got the Muslim ban, where Muslims have difficulties entering the country, even those that have green cards, and Muslim citizens are being harassed.
But then the children are of course seeing all of this, they're discussing it amongst themselves, and we can't shelter them from all of that public information.
And then there's the discrimination that's taking place where in fact some teachers who consider themselves part of the "conservative" movement are using this opportunity to discriminate against students based on their beliefs.
Obviously, it's very difficult to prove that it is motivated by discrimination. But it's just sort of all around, this pressure. The children are being subjected to this overt discrimination and they're thinking to themselves, what have I done to warrant this?
And they haven't done anything! How do I raise a healthy child given that all of this hate exists around them and is directed at them?
EmbraceRace: Fair question, Nabeela. Allison?
Allison: I was wondering if I could ask you, what are the things that you're currently doing to try to help them navigate this really complicated and unjust situation that your children are facing?
Nabeela: The difficulty I face is that I do not want my child to be raised thinking she's a victim. I do not want her to have a victim mentality. I want her to feel empowered to be able to make decisions and choices in her life and that she can actually exert some sort of self-power in this world.
So I am telling her to be polite but be confident in speaking what they feel when other students say something to her. To talk to people in authority about it, not be afraid to answer back if someone says something. And I also tried to tell her that not everyone is hateful. Just because this happens to be the general mood in the country presently it isn't everyone's attitude. But I just feel kind of helpless, really! I don't really know what kinds of messaging I should be giving.
Allison: I think you're helping all of us think about the things that we can do as we face oppression. And one of the things that you help to lift up is that what's really important and a value for you is not staying in the victim position but rather teaching your children how to be resilient and resistant.
It sounds like you're doing that, by giving them this kind of access to strategies as to how to fight oppression. And those strategies may be something simple in terms of a script that we give our children to say when they hear something. Or a person they can come to and talk about this.
I heard you give your children strategies. When something happens, find this kind of an adult. Or speak up about it. Or it's important for us to respond with kindness and also to be assertive ourselves. I really hear a sophisticated strategy for resistance building with your children. And I think you're also tapping into something too in terms of feeling like isolated, that we as parents need to come up with all the right answers.
But I also would invite folks to be in community with us. How are other people who are Muslim dealing with this? What are they saying? Are there groups that give opportunities to connect on that? But also, how are those of us that are not Muslim, how are we actually standing up to help as well?
The invitation for people who are not Muslim is to be paying attention too. We can talk about this in terms of allyship but we also have to be thoughtful about making sure that you don't feel alone in doing this. Because if we leave you alone in doing this then we are complicit in the oppression.
I think another piece you raised up is: what about the stories in your own family and community about resistance/resilience? So, not pointing to images of victimhood but actually, say, look at all the people that we know that have survived things like this before and are doing really well.
Look at how I'm doing it, which may not be perfect, but to point to that — you are resisting as well. And giving kids proximity to those kinds of living examples of living resistance and resilience is really important. Connecting up with stories and pride are very important as well.
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"How do we reassure kids when we don't know how bad things will get?"
EmbraceRace: Nabeela, thanks for that question and best of luck.
So, not surprisingly, we got quite a few questions from people — and especially from parents and from teachers — who are very much associated with members of groups who are being targeted.
In Nabeela's case, she's especially concerned about her Muslim identity, her family's identity as Muslim, her children's identity. We also got lots of questions about immigrants — undocumented immigrants, but also documented immigrants.
And one in particular from Renee I wanted to read for you here. Her question is, "how do we reassure kids when we don't know how bad things will get?" And then she adds some context. She says, "My husband is not a U.S. citizen and the anti-immigrant sentiments that are being stirred up are personally concerning." Any wisdom there, Allison?
Allison: We can't promise that everything will be OK because we don't really know that's true. And I know that it's a hard place to be in, but let's think about other places that we've had to do that within the context of family — like perhaps in the context of someone who's ill or a move or a divorce. We actually have places we've practiced thinking about how not to over-promise that something perfect is going to be the outcome.
And, going back to the previous question, we also need to present a strategy to help kids cope. So helping them think about where we are right now and what we're doing to try to be safe. What opportunities we have to try to be safe together, to point to those.
Kids are going to be nervous and afraid and have big feelings.
So you need to build up a resilience in kids to handle difficult things. They're going to face difficult things and we're going to have to build up their resilience by being there to support them as they do that.
"How to explain ICE raids to my brown daughters?"
EmbraceRace: Thank you very much. We're going to go to another question. Jess, are you there
Jess: Yes, I'm struggling with how to explain the ICE raids to my brown six and eight-year-old daughters so that, first of all, they don't become completely terrified. But also, so that it doesn't become a conversation about us and them and instead stays inclusive. For example, they started asking "So could this friend be deported, and how about this friend, but that friend can't be…" And I just didn't know how to handle it.
Allison: So how have you begun to talk about the ICE raids so far? What kind of language are you using?
Jess: Well, I didn't do a very good job! I mean I quickly went to, we are all in this together, and we stand up for our friends, and we adults are making sure that kids are safe. I really struggled when it started feeling like it was getting specific to certain kids.
Allison: Is there a worry that kind of separating out 'us' and 'them' or 'this kid' and 'that kid' would come back to those children? I want to understand a little bit more about the worry behind that.
Jess: Well, I want it to feel like kids aren't targeted or separated out but that we are all working together to support each other. And I know that's not the case with these raids, but I don't know how to present that to them in a way that doesn't become terrifying and dividing.
Allison: I hear the value that you're articulating that we're a community and that we are working hard to make sure that people stay safe, and there are grownups working hard to make sure that kids stay safe. And I think those are great, age-appropriate messages to be sending kids to help give them a structure. You've also identified that the truth of the matter is that kids are being targeted and people are being targeted.
And what I've learned, actually from Melissa and Andrew, is that there's an opportunity in this to have a conversation about privilege, even with young kids, and how we can use privilege. I'm making an assumption but perhaps your kids, while brown, aren't immigrants or aren't dealing with that piece. Then the idea is to talk to them about how they don't have to worry about that but other friends do. So how do we want to be helpful to those other friends? What can we do to stand up for those friends? Again it's connecting up strategy, giving them a strategy to negotiate these difficult places.
I think what your kids were doing by identifying the different kids is trying to make sense of who's at risk. Of course that's hard and complicated. I'm a big fan of narrating our discomfort, saying something like: You're asking some really good questions. But mama really has to think about this a little bit more because I want to make sure that you don't get too scared and that we're still able to be good friends to people. I use a lot of those techniques to buy more time.
I also want us to be compassionate to ourselves as parents because I'm hearing that you're actually doing a really good job of trying to think about what's going on and trying to support your children in being good allies. And you got stuck in a place that's complicated because … it's complicated!
EmbraceRace: Let me interject one question. Jess's kids are 6 and 8, same age as our daughters. How can we help them, at that age, support their friends while also understanding, first, that there are limits to what young children can do to be truly helpful, and, second, that in some cases too many questions can actually be threatening to kids who might be undocumented.
Allison: Young kids, and certainly kids that age, are really oriented around fairness. And for older kids it's the construct of identity and peers: what does it mean to be a good friend?
And I think many of us as parents have already had to have a conversation
about what it means to be a good friend? What does it mean to have empathy? What does it mean to be kind? Many of us have that language in some shape or form.
And you can take it a step further and say, what does it mean to be a good ally or supporter or person, period. But the basic construct is, how would you want to be a friend to someone who's in distress? That's what we're talking about, right? Who's scared and who's got bad things happening?
It's an opportunity for us to highlight the conversations that we're already having, and to use it to draw it back to this particular piece. So, how is it that you'd be a good friend to someone having a hard time? And this hard time that they're having is that they're scared and they're unsafe and something bad might happen. What would we do? What would it look like. What would it feel like. What are the things that we wouldn't do? How do you step in when someone's teasing someone?
I want us to capitalize on the conversations that we're already having.
EmbraceRace: Jess, how is that landing?
Jess: Yeah, bringing it to a level where we've already been feels a little more grounding, because this is all so unmooring for all of us. And I also think you're right on with that it taps into privilege.
There's a lot that as you said is unchartered. That's where it gets scary. It's great when it's grounded in, how do we be kind to others, how do we show up for others — that they can get. And I think it's really helpful but I think there is this overarching feeling of … the unknown.
"How do we engage, and help kids engage, family members with whom we profoundly disagree?"
EmbraceRace: Jess, thank you very much for the question.
Allison, let me ask you another one that flows from the conversation we've been having. Again it comes from one of our registrants. How do we help our children and ourselves foster a resistance mentality that doesn't turn into hatred or fear mongering?
As we know, the country is deeply polarized in some ways, not least around the Trump administration, some of its policies, some of its rhetoric. And there are questions about how we, for example, even as adults, engage family members with whom we profoundly disagree and who profoundly disagree with us? And maybe even trickier, how do we help our children, especially young children, navigate that?
It could be grandparents, an uncle, whomever it is. As a rule, we want our children to have good, strong, loving relationships with those folks. Any wisdom there?
Allison: Again, I route back to, how is it that we as families have had to negotiate across difference? Sometimes we don't! Sometimes the big conflicts end up in rifts and ruptures in our relationships, we know that also happens. But you're asking, how do we engage not only across difference but also engage across differences that we feel about morals and ethics as well?
First of all, we need to do our own thinking about it while being aware that kids are watching us negotiate that. The other piece is: how we want to support them in engaging with different opinions?
Start where kids are. How do we disagree? What is it like to disagree? How do we disagree and come back? How do we try to remain with our integrity? And these are again things that we do with small kids. So how do you disagree with your sister? How do you disagree with each other?
We have a saying in our family: "Don't yuck my Yum." So that's when one person says they like something and the other person says, "I hate it!" What we're trying to build up is a conversation about how we engage in our differences. You're posing a question that we're all struggling with and I think the answer is maybe we can struggle with this together. Not separately. We've got some basic language that we can use with kids.
It starts off with, how do we disagree? Maybe if we had had more attention to that when we were growing up we'd be better able to negotiate these differences! But I think it's a great space for us to talk about it amongst ourselves and adults first to try to figure it out.
EmbraceRace: That's a great answer to a really tough question. And it occurs to me that it's a lot easier to do that if no one you're close to is likely to be deported or likely to be put on a registry. When the stakes and consequences are that serious and affect people very close to you, bridging the gap is especially hard, right?
Allison: We have to face the reality that if the stakes are that high and you're on the receiving end of the discrimination, this is where we know that families rupture. And so that's not the outcome that we have hoped for but I bet you everybody on the call either has that one person in the family they don't talk to anymore or knows of someone.
But I also hope that repair can happen as well. And perhaps it's due to the experience of being close to another experiencing that level of oppression and discrimination that people's minds can change.
Ibram Kendi has a great piece about racial and racist progress based on his book
"How do I balance emphasizing our history of social advance against the reality of progress lost?"
EmbraceRace: Thank you Allison. Greta, we'd love to go to your question.
Greta: Thank you. How do I balance continuing to emphasize the history of social change with the reality of Trump et al turning back progress? My son is 11. But he knows a lot about current events and he knows the history of the advancement of civil rights slowly, over time. But with this being uncharted territory, a new moment, how do we balance that?
Allison: What I hear you also talking about, the value you're communicating with your son, is that history is really quite important. It's an opportunity to look at moments in history where there were setbacks and where there were fights that felt like they were lost. And what did people do to overcome that?
I think what you're actually providing is a great invitation to get rooted in our history, and to see that people have been fighting these fights for a very, very, long time and they have felt like progress was made and no progress was made. They have come to war. But there's an opportunity for us to think through the long arc of history and to be paying attention to where it's bending.
I also hear you struggling with, and a lot of people are feeling this, a kind of hopelessness. But I actually think that by engaging deeply with our history we can benefit from the wisdom of folks who've also been hopeless, and see the changes that have been made. I might just be an optimist but I think that your sense of attending to history is exactly the right thing to be doing.
EmbraceRace: Greta, how have you been dealing with it so far and what's your son making of these times?
Greta: He's watching. You know, I mean we're involved in organized protests. We share similar reactions to the absurdity. And he has that sense of wide-eyed astonishment: how can this be happening? If people committed crimes why are they not being punished? I think we're just sort of fumbling along together, sort of minute by minute. That's how it feels.
Allison: I think it's a great place to go back in history. And as an 11 year-old your son is in this moral development phase, asking: don't bad things happen when you do bad things? Aren't there consequences? And part of our development is around understanding, hmmm, that's not how it works.
All of us can probably remember that sense of when we came into awareness that life isn't fair. That's part of that experience. How it is that we help support our kids in still fighting for justice in the midst of that. Again, I think the invitation to cull from stories of history and the folks that have been set back and still went forward is a wise one.
Greta: Thank you. Wonderful. Thanks so much.
Where do white people fit in the struggle for justice? How do we talk to white kids about that?
EmbraceRace: Let's go to Andrew.
Andrew : So the question that I have is, as a cis, white male, where do I fit in with this in regard to a 10-year-old daughter? Similar to the last person, we certainly have been part of a lot of protests.
We have some neighbors that we're very close with who are a biracial and bi-religious family, including a couple of very new green card holders. And she's worried about what might happen to them. I'm also worried. But I feel like I am somewhere in a weird no-man's land of being conceptually a part of the class of people in power but feeling completely detached from them.
EmbraceRace: It's a great question Andrew. Let me just elaborate a little bit with reference to a similar question with a slightly different cut that someone else asked which was, a white woman with white children wanted to know how she can talk to her kids about the fact that, from her perspective, many of the people promoting the racial challenges she sees look like them?
Allison: The first thing I would say is to go back to that idea of reflecting and doing one's own work. There's a group called SURJ, Standing Up for Racial Justice, and it's a group specifically focused on and for white people. It's focused on exactly these questions that are being posed, where does one stand, how does one participate? What does one need to do? How to reflect upon one's own privilege and how to leverage that?
I direct folks to take a look at SURJ materials. It's a great opportunity to begin to do or continue to do the work beyond protesting. The work does need to be deepened and people do need to think about and pay attention to their own white racial identities and it's a great opportunity to leverage privilege in terms of thinking about allyship. I know allyship is a fraught term, but thinking about how one ought to provide support and how not to be co-opted by a system of oppression.
In terms of talking to kids about it, I think we talk about fairness and justice and use that to build up and structure our conversation about privilege.
Remember: talking about privilege isn't to make people feel bad, but rather an opportunity to think about paying attention and think about how we can actually operate according to our values — our ideas of justice and fairness and what we want to happen. Helping kids get complicated and, sure, they'll say look at all the people that are doing "bad things," but look at all the people that are doing good things. It's something that we can and have done with our kids in other contexts too.
Andrew: I appreciate particularly the reminder that being in a place of privilege also gives us the chance to model values that we want to see our world bring about.
"How do we model integration in our homes and in our communities?"
EmbraceRace: Karen, we're coming to you.
Karen: My question, thinking in terms of a very well-known book, Why Are All the Black Kids Sitting Together in the Cafeteria? by Beverly Daniel Tatum, is: how do we model integration in our homes and in our communities? I live in a community that seems to be fairly diverse compared to the rest of the state. However, segregation is still very apparent.Allison: That's a great book and a great resource to offer up. And the thing that I take away from that book, which speaks to why it is that kids group together according to race, is both an understanding about how normative that is, and how it's actually OK. It's OK if it's a self-selected opportunity to connect across shared interests and shared likes. And we also have to engineer spaces that allow us to move beyond 'integration' and move into places where we're actually working together and collaborating together.
How do we find opportunities to put forward goals that we can all come together for and leverage our talents? Is there a school workday? Or is there an opportunity to bring families together for a particular kind of cause? Is there some sort of community opportunity to bring folks together to think about, strategically, things like outreach and accessibility to make sure that we're inviting everybody?
I think you can also start off small in terms of noticing who your kids have playdates with. Are there opportunities to reach out across those playdates? Kids notice who their parents are with, who comes over for dinner? Who do we have interactions with? Start off small and in conscientious ways, reaching out and building community. I think that we're able to do the both/and of knowing that self-selected groups happen.
And we also have the opportunity to build up community that isn't just diverse but actually holistically integrated. We have to start by looking at ourselves and asking ourselves some questions about who we're spending time with.
Karen: I think that was an excellent response and I hope to be able to use that response in promoting discussion in our community. So thank you.
"How do we support our kids to 'stand in' their values?"
EmbraceRace: Here's a question that I really loved. What resources are available to help kids have good conversations amongst themselves when no grownups are around? We can send out resources.
But I actually want to tweak the question a little bit, Allison. Our kids, certainly once they're school-age, spend a tremendous amount of time with their peers, and much of that time is without adult supervision or even adult company. Some of that interaction we would be pleased with, no doubt, if we were there to hear it. And some of it we wouldn't be pleased with.
So, imagine that an 8 year-old, a 10 year-old, a 5 year-old, comes to you and says, you know, I'm a little bit concerned about what my friends are saying. I don't agree with it. It's not the way we talk about these issues at home and yet they're my friends and I don't want to get into something that will create tension. How do we support our kids to really 'stand in' their values?
Allison: I think part of that is to go back to how we are really supporting kids and understanding what their values are, what our values are as a family. Through both explicit conversations about our family mission or motto. Or through the way we behave.
There is one resource I can think of from Howard Stevenson. Howard Stevenson provides a model of how to support kids and he has one particular model for how to support black kids in predominantly white spaces. And the way he does that is by protecting kids with stories of resistance or resilience. But he helped kids by role playing or scripting. Here's what you can say if a kid says this; let's try it on.I know that feels 'hokey' to me as a parent. But it's helpful because we're giving our kids practice. So, let's practice together. What if someone says this? If you think about it, it's somewhat the language that we try to give our kids in the context of how to say no to drugs or how to think about issues of consent. So why couldn't we also bring that into a conversation about race?
We're not going to be able to watch them all the time. But if we can give them practice and support, that may be one option. And also, especially as kids get older, we can help them reflect on how the conversation went. And thinking about how they might want to do the conversation differently.
Where are we headed?
EmbraceRace: Allison, as someone who interacts so much with kids, you've really been at the front line of seeing what kids of different ages are thinking, how they're responding to what's happening.
On one hand, many of us are very concerned about Trump, his rhetoric, and some of the policies his administration is already pursuing. Some of these concern racialized, life-and-death issues. On the other hand, under Donald Trump's campaign and governance what were once 'dog whistles' — the use of code words to signal race and manipulate people — have become explicit. And maybe that's a good thing: it's undeniable and that gives us greater opportunity to engage this stuff head on.
Through your engagement with kids, are you getting a sense already of what the likely net impact will be?
Allison: Well, more than anything I'm hearing the concerns about what the impact will be. As we heard in the first call, concerns about how will my children fare, will they be seen as a victim? I'm definitely hearing those kinds of concerns. I'm also hearing concerns from kids as well about how to make sense of people doing things that I disagree with.
But maybe I'm just an optimist. I'm really hopeful that if we continue to step up both dialogue and actions around resistance, perhaps we'll be able to create a generation of folks that haven't been dog-whistled to, but rather are very clear about what oppression is and how they can fight it. Perhaps we'll have a generation of folks that are really quite sophisticated, not only in dialogue but in action and in crafting a resistance.
I'm hopeful in part because of the conversations that I hear, in part because of the questions, in part because there are people at 10:00 at night who are engaged and listening to this! So I sit in a really unique place of getting a chance to hear parents who are determined to ensure that the world is a just place.
How do we pull teachers and schools into the racial justice conversation?
EmbraceRace: I hear you. We have a number of questions and again, you've spoken to this in pieces but I wonder if you could pull it together for us, a number of people asking for a strategies for bringing teachers along in that conversation. For example, as a parent who shares the kind of concerns that folks on this call have mentioned and might be concerned about whether or not the teacher at school shares those values and is acting on those values. Do you have any general wisdom on how to approach schools?
Allison: Step one is to be really empathetic for the difficult position that many teachers are in. Teachers have to negotiate the opinions and attitudes and the requests of, say, 30 to 40 different folks and that can be overwhelming. Schools might have particular approaches as well. I think the bulk of my work has been teachers asking me: How do I do this? I want to have a language and a strategy for engaged empathy.
I've had the opportunity to do this work with teachers across the Bay Area, which some consider a bubble. But resoundingly, I hear that teachers want help in how to talk about issues of racial justice and they feel silenced, told that they can't talk about this. So that's step one.
Number two is to think about how to actually get involved with the school. Is there a PTA, is there a site council? Is there an opportunity to have a conversation? What is the school's stance on racial justice? Do we have one? What is the school's stance on immigration? Do we have a stance? What would it take to have a stance? What about parents who are interested?
I also heard questions about how to support folks experiencing immigration-related stress? What about the opportunity to do a coordinated resource share at a school? And that is also an opportunity to engage with teachers, administration, and staff as well. That can be complicated because there are people with different opinions in schools. And that's an opportunity to bring folks together because there's probably someone at school who shares your opinion. And it's an opportunity to engage with teachers on these topics.
Also think about whether you have a one-on-one relationship with the teacher? Can you talk about this in a parent-teacher conference? And can you begin to have these kinds of conversations we were talking about — difficult conversations with family members — with teachers as well? There is great opportunity to engage our schools and have schools be locations for this rich, complicated dialogue.
"How do you encourage your child to speak up when grandparents make ignorant comments?"
EmbraceRace: Earlier we asked the question about dealing with specific family members or extended family members who hold very different political and social views with the stakes seeming so high. I have a question here that really gets to this issue of being challenged to have in the moment and difficult conversations.
The question is simply this. How do you encourage your child to speak up when grandparents make ignorant comments? It's obviously not just grandparents, but in the moment something has happened.
Somehow we all think about a holiday, some family get together. So how do you support the child if the child is in that situation? And what do we do not just as adults with our parents, but with our parents when a child is present? That adds a wrinkle.
Allison: I can't promise a right answer to that! It gets really complicated and you need to pay attention to family dynamics and also cultural dynamics — is it OK to speak up to an elder? I definitely know and work in communities where it's not OK to disagree with an elder and where it would be horrifying in any context for a child to disagree with an elder.
But I also think part of that is thinking about, if we're present, what our role is and how/what we model. And can we practice or have a script or figure out how to intervene.
Part of it is actually for us as parents to do the work of knowing who our family is and what kinds of conversations we can anticipate. So if we know that we've got that family member that strongly disagrees with us, how will we make Thanksgiving work? What is it that we want to convey? What is it that we want our children to convey? Be thoughtful about who we want our kids to be in those moments.
We practice, role play, script or be explicit about what we want them to be able to say and how we want to be able to act as well. I appreciate how complicated that is and even doing that doesn't mean a great outcome will emerge.
Mentioned and Related Resources
For caregivers:
How to talk to your kids about Donald Trump, Dr. Allison Briscoe-Smith, The Greater Good, April 13, 2016
Rubbing Off, Dr. Allison Brisoe-Smith, The Greater Good
Racial Progress is Real. But so is Racist Progress by Ibram X. Kendi, NY Times — A way to think about historical forces, progress and setbacks.
Promoting Racial Literacy in Schools: Differences That Make a Difference by Howard Stevenson
Why are all the black kids sitting together in the cafeteria? by Beverly Daniel Tatum
Standing Up for Racial Justice (SURJ) — National network of affiliated groups and individuals organizing White people for racial justice. Also check out SURJ Families for resources targeted at White kids and families.
For kids:
When a Bully is President- Truth and Creativity from Oppressive Times
Maya Gonzalez
When a bully is president: Truth and Creativity for Oppressive Times/ Cuando El Presidente es un Bulí: La Verdad y la Creatividad en Tiempos Opresivos, written and illustrated by Maya Gonzalez, for kids 7 to 10 years old "Self-Care for Kids! A children's book to talk about current and historical oppression and bullying in the United States while focusing on the important role kids can play using creativity and self love as a base to develop strength during difficult times." Allison says "I recommend all of Maya Gonzalez' work!" Melissa says, " Our kids loved this book and were inspired to draw themselves as part of the resistance as a result."
Max and the Tagalong Moon
Floyd Cooper, for kids 3 to 7 years old
"Max loves his grandpa. When they must say good-bye after a visit, Grandpa promises Max that the moon at Grandpa's house is the same moon that will follow him all the way home ... A gentle, comforting story that will reassure children that those who love us are always with us."
Patrice Karst and Illustrated by Geoff Stevenson, for kids 4 to 8 years old
"Specifically written to address children's fear of being apart from the ones they love, The Invisible String delivers a particularly compelling message in today's uncertain times that though we may be separated from the ones we care for, whether through anger, or distance or even death, love is the unending connection that binds us all, and, by extension, ultimately binds every person on the planet to everyone else."
Allison Briscoe-Smith is a child psychologist specializing in trauma and ethnic minority mental health. She's a professor at the Wright Institute in San Francisco and she identifies as black. She and her partner have two multi-racial children who are black, white and Latino.
Same Family, Different Colors: Talking Colorism in the Family >
Understanding Racial-Ethnic Identity Development >
Breaking Hate: Supporting Kids to Push Back Against White Nationalism >


text:
Q: Angular ng-repeat clear all the value in view

{{obj.resource.fields.symbol}}

{{obj.resource.fields.price | currency }}

        <input type="text" class="form-control target-price" ng-model="stock.high">
        <button class="btn btn-primary">Watch</button>
        <input type="text" class="form-control target-price" ng-model="stock.low">
        {{stock}}

Controller
function StockController($http, $interval){
  var stockCtrl = this;
  stockCtrl.stocks = [];

  $interval(function(){
    $http.jsonp('http://finance.yahoo.com/webservice/v1/symbols/APPL/quote?format=json&callback=JSON_CALLBACK')
    .success(function(data){
        stockCtrl.stocks = data.list.resources;
      });
  },2000);

}

Here every second Ajax pulls data from REST and puts the result into an array. I am looping through that array with ng-repeat to show those values on the view. i have two other ng-model values in that ng-repeat. When ever ng-repeat re rendering the view, it clearing the other ng-model values as well(in this case 'high' and 'low'). Why this is happening. How to prevent this?
Here is the sceneria: Ajax pulls multiple stocks. I will set different high and low values for each stock, beacause i want to sell when that particular stock reaches its high or low. So i want those high and low to stay there for each stock. only the stock price would change
Ultimate i am going to write a watcher for that stock object to current stock price with its high and low

A: Its a guess here, your high and low are not objects and pure local  variables so its getting lost on ng-repeat as it creates a new scope and also re-renders the view.

{{obj.resource.fields.symbol}}

{{obj.resource.fields.price | currency }}

        <input type="text" class="form-control target-price" ng-model="high">
        <button class="btn btn-primary">Watch</button>
        <input type="text" class="form-control target-price" ng-model="low">
        {{high}}

You could fix this by change this.high and this.low to like this below:
this.someObject = {};
this.someObject.high = "somevalue";
this.someObject.low = "somevalue";

A: It looks like a couple of things are happening: first, you're clearing the high and low models each time you render the page since they don't have placeholders inside of the controller. For that I would switch from two way binding and do one way binding so as to hold the values or at least create placeholders in the controller. Second, you're binding high and low to every repeated stock instance. Which, if it hasn't already, is going to cause you problems in the future.

A: ng-repeat will load all the data inside it whenever a new AJAX request is made which updates the main Array in ng-repeat
You may have to do the following:
1) Link the ng-model values to the ng-repeat array itself as
ng-model="obj.low"
ng-model="obj.high"

2) Then on each change (you can use ng-change() etc. ) to store the array locally in case you are not submitting it to backend. Use $sessionStorage.obj (say)
3) At each updation using AJAX call, you need to check if $sessionStorage has value of high and low as:
$interval(function(){
    $http.jsonp('http://finance.yahoo.com/webservice/v1/symbols/APPL/quote?format=json&callback=JSON_CALLBACK')
    .success(function(data){
        var response = data.list.resources;
        angular.forEach(response, function(item){

             angular.forEach($sessionStorage.obj, function(obj){

                if(item.low != obj.low){
                    item.low = obj.low
                }
                if(item.high != obj.high){
                    item.high = obj.high
                }
             });

        });

        stockCtrl.stocks = response;

      });
  },2000);

A: My suggestion is to keep a separate object using each ticker as keys
$scope.myData={
    'MSFT': {high:54.25, low: 51.67},
    'AAPL': {high:99.26, low: 97.89}

}

Then in view:
<input type="text" class="form-control target-price" ng-model="myData[obj.symbol].high">

You could then also store this in localStorage for persistence between page loads

redpajama_set_name: RedPajamaStackExchange


text:
'Servant' Renewed For Season 3 By Apple
'Servant' Apple TV+
Apple TV+ has handed an early Season 3 renewal to psychological thriller series Servant from Oscar-nominated director M. Night Shyamalan. The third-season pickup comes ahead of the series' Season 2 premiere on January 15.
This is the fourth Apple TV+ original series to receive an early Season 3 renewal, joining For All Mankind, Dickinson and Ted Lasso.
Directed by Shyamalan and created by Tony Basgallop, Servant follows a Philadelphia couple in mourning after an unspeakable tragedy creates a rift in their marriage and opens the door for a mysterious force to enter their home.
Following its suspenseful Season 1 finale, the second season of Servant takes a supernatural turn with a darker future for all lying ahead as Leanne (Nell Tiger Free) returns to the brownstone and her true nature is revealed.
2019-20 TV Renewals And Cancellations
Lauren Ambrose, Toby Kebbell, Free and Rupert Grint are reprising their characters for the 10-episode second season.
In addition to Shyamalan and Basgallop, Servant is executive produced by Ashwin Rajan, Jason Blumenthal, Todd Black and Steve Tisch. Taylor Latham and Patrick Markey serve as executive producers.
Season 2 will debut globally with the first episode on Friday, January 15, followed by one new episode every Friday exclusively on Apple TV+.
M. Night Shyalaman

redpajama_set_name: RedPajamaCommonCrawl


text:
What we do in the UK
Our economic contribution
UK Key Facts
UK Sport technology partnership
Our services offering
Our Key Markets
Future Skills for our UK business
Our Businesses (UK)
Air sector
Land UK
Regional Aircraft
Celebrating women in engineering
BAE Systems' CV90 increases lethality by testing SPIKE LR anti-tank guided missile 7 Jan 2020
Record-breaking apprentice intake set as UK programmes ramp up 27 Dec 2019
UK Careers
NewsroomNewsNational Success for Barrow Apprentices
National Success for Barrow Apprentices
25 Nov 2013 2013-11-25T01:00:00+01:00
Two BAE Systems apprentices put Barrow on the map last week when they were handed top awards in a national skills competition.
18 year old Josh Procter was ranked second in the country in the Construction Metalwork Competition at the UK Skills Show held in the National Exhibition Centre in Birmingham. He shook off competition from seven other competitors to scoop a Silver medal.
Alongside him, 19 year old Mike Cormish took on six other apprentices in the Metal Sheetwork discipline. Although he narrowly missed out on receiving a medal, Mike was awarded 'most improved' by the judges.
Josh and Mike qualified to represent BAE Systems in the UK Skills show final after beating rivals during regional heats earlier this year. Two other steelwork apprentices from Maritime-Submarines, Tom Richardson and Bradley Pearce, qualified for the final but were unfortunately unable to attend.
Second year apprentice, Josh Procter, said: "I went to the competition not expecting anything other than to do my best. I would have liked to have brought home the gold medal but I'm pretty happy with silver!
"It was a really worthwhile experience. I found the crowds of people watching a bit strange – I didn't like the attention.
"I have to work to exact tolerances in my daily work so the competition standards weren't new to me, but I learnt that I can work to tight deadlines."
Mike Cormish said: "I didn't do as much training as I'd have liked so I was nervous travelling down to the competition but when I settled in and got in the zone I was ok.
"I was working in isolation for the two and a half days that my competition ran for. I managed the bending and rolling ok – but I struggled with the welding on the first day. When I got familiar with the new equipment then away I went.
"I went down to Birmingham to push myself and represent the company - and feel I did just that."
Dave Keenan is a Senior Trainer at BAE Systems Maritime – Submarines and accompanied Mike and Josh to the competition. He said: "We are extremely proud of how both apprentices performed.
"Notching up some of the best scores in the UK during the preliminary heats and then again during the final is no easy feat. In addition to the pressures of the competition, there were over 100,000 visitors at the show who were all able to stop and watch them at work. So they definitely felt the pressure!
"Each competition lasted seven hours and the apprentices were required to work in isolation. They had to manage their time carefully, get to grips with new equipment and all under the watchful eye of assessors and the general public.
"The quality of the work that Josh and Mike produced is fantastic. The specialist skills, determination and pride they were able to demonstrate really did BAE Systems and Barrow proud."
Lara van Eijkern External Communications Advisor Maritime
External Communications Advisor
Paula Hetherington External Communications Advisor Maritime
Maritime Twitter
Keep up to date with the latest developments at BAE Systems Maritime.


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We've raised £0 to Support the mental health of patients recovering from mental health issues at Wedgwood House.
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Crowdfunding is a new type of fundraising where you can raise funds for your own personal cause, even if you're not a registered nonprofit.
The page owner is responsible for the distribution of funds raised.
We take patients out of Wedgwood house, onto Hardwick Heath and encourage them to take notice, photograph and record their surroundings. We look at the beauty of trees, patterns in nature and light and shade. The project encourages patients to build up a portfolio and record their observations in journals.
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text:
Q: Any reference and tutorial on writing .cls file class? I was trying to re-edit the report.cls file to adapt to our institution thesis presentation format. I was stuck at declaring and executing options,also with error flag on xcolor file execution. Having a typical structure for declaring options or a tutorial on writing cls class will be appreciated.
My project ran but after the options were commented.
Thanks


text:
using Newtonsoft.Json.Linq;
using System;
using System.Linq;
using System.Threading.Tasks;
using System.Web.Http;
using Newtonsoft.Json;
using System.Text.RegularExpressions;
using System.Threading;
using ResumeBot.Services;

namespace ResumeBot.Controllers
{
    public class MessagesController : ApiController
    {
        private readonly WebClientService webClientService;

        public MessagesController()
        {
            webClientService = new WebClientService(new Uri("https://msging.net/messages"), "<your-api-key-here>");
        }

        // POST api/messages
        public async Task<IHttpActionResult> Post(JObject message)
        {
            Console.WriteLine($"Message Received: {message}");

            var content = message["content"].Value<string>();
            var from = message["from"].Value<string>();
            var messageContent = "";

            switch (content.Trim())
            {
                case "info":
                case "informação":
                case "about":
                    messageContent = "Meu nome é Jonh Lorem Foo, eu tenho 25 anos. \n\nVocê pode me encontrar por telefone: +55 31 99827 1039 ou através do meu email: loremfoo@ipsum.com";
                    break;

                case "formação":
                case "formacao":
                case "education":
                    messageContent = "*Mestre em Física Nuclear pela NASA\n*Graduado em Economia pela Faculdade de Harvard - USA";
                    break;

                case "experiência":
                case "experiencia":
                case "experience":
                    messageContent = "Possuo 10 anos de experiência em análise de dados complexos. Meus últimos trabalhos foram para:\n\nGoogle\nFacebook\nNSA\nMicrosoft";
                    break;

                case "habilidade":
                case "skills":
                    messageContent = "Principais habilidades: \n\nComunicador\nExtrovertido\nGosta de trabalhar em equipe\nProgramação Android";
                    break;

                default:
                    //default message if user send a unknow command
                    messageContent = "Oi, eu sou o chat bot do Jonh :) \nPosso lhe passar várias informações profissionais sobre ele. \n\nSe quiser saber mais me mande um dos comandos abaixo: \n\nabout\neducation\nexperience\nskills!";
                    break;
            }

            var replyMessage = new
            {
                id = Guid.NewGuid(),
                to = from,
                type = "text/plain",
                content = messageContent
            };

            await ReplyMessageAsync(replyMessage);

            return Ok();
        }

        private async Task ReplyMessageAsync(object message)
        {
            var response = await webClientService.SendMessageAsync(message);
        }
    }
}

redpajama_set_name: RedPajamaGithub


text:
Want to see more like this?
Chapman Magazine seeks to convey the overall excellence of Chapman University by presenting news and features that illuminate the distinctive people, programs, history and culture of the university.
Read more Chapman Magazine stories
Big Dreams Bold Vision
The Argyros School celebrates 20 years of building upon the legacy of its extraordinary namesake by continuing to extend its reach and multiply its impact.
By Dawn Bonker
"Nonuple" isn't an everyday word for most people. But it's an illuminating one at Chapman University's Argyros School of Business and Economics.
The term describes when something is nine times greater than it once was. At the Argyros School, it comes in handy to quantify the growth of academic publishing by faculty in the past two decades. It's just one sign of the school's progress in the 20 years since it took on the name and embraced the vision of The Honorable George L. Argyros '59. Among the remarkable indicators are increased student selectivity, a climb in the rankings and growing numbers of alumni rising up in every industry, from technology to international investment.
Still, the dean of the school can't resist some fun with the word that says so much about the unique brand of energy fueling the upward trajectory there.
"I had to learn this term," Argyros Dean Tom Turk, Ph.D., says with a laugh. "Because we've nonupled our research publishing in the past 20 years. That's pretty significant."
Such a culture of achievement was precisely what alumnus Argyros envisioned for the school named in his honor. In his remarks during the naming dedication, Argyros called for greatness.
"Dare to dream. Take advantage of the ability to think big and reach high. Be willing to take risks. Fight courageously for the principles you believe in," Argyros said.
As the school marks two decades since its naming, it's clear that the leadership, faculty, students and alumni have more than delivered on that challenge. Today the Argyros School ranks among the world's top 100 business schools in U.S. News & World Report rankings, offering eight areas of specialization for undergraduates and five graduate programs. The school graduates some 600 students every year, compared with about 180 two decades ago, and boasts a faculty of nearly 80, including Vernon Smith, Ph.D., Nobel laureate in economics.
Underscoring it all is an unmatched student experience. With help from the school's own career services office, students find meaningful internships. Undergraduates and graduates alike collaborate in small classes taught by faculty who are industry leaders as well as gifted teachers. Also in the classroom are business experts, thanks to a robust schedule of speakers who visit classes throughout the year. Many, including partners with the Big Four accounting firms, even return for mock interviews. None just talk and run.
Argyros School graduate programs
Percentage of employment offers to Argyros School students that are accepted within 90 days of graduation (Class of 2016)
Ranking in
Businessweek Best
Business Schools,
2016 (most recent rankings)
U.S. Full-Time MBA
Programs, 2018
visits by employers
each year
Dare to dream. Take advantage of the ability to think big and reach high. Be willing to take risks. Fight courageously for the principles you believe in."
– George L. Argyros '59
"We have influential business leaders who interact with our students in a personal setting. At a bigger university, you're never going to meet them. It's not like you're going to go for coffee with them and ask them questions," Turk says. "Here, that's fairly typical."
Life beyond the traditional curriculum and classrooms whirrs with vigor, too. In the Janes Financial Center, students have access to 12 Bloomberg terminals, which they use to oversee the Student Managed Investment Fund. In addition, the students thrive in Research Challenge competitions sponsored by the Chartered Financial Institute (CFA). In fact, they hold a three-year winning streak.
Another hallmark is the school's Economic Science Institute, founded in 2008 and led by Professor Vernon Smith, who received the Nobel Prize in 2002. He is regarded as "the father of experimental economics," having formulated and formalized the principles and much of the methodology of that now-thriving discipline.
The institute's widely recognized level of expertise has served to attract additional numbers of prestigious faculty. Moreover, it has made Chapman a hub of experimental economics, and supports its newest minor, humanomics, which explores economics through the lens of the humanities, and humanities through the lens of economics.
Our alumni provide great connections and intellectual expertise."
Reflecting the entrepreneurial spirit and real estate career that was foundational to its namesake, the Argyros School will introduce an M.S. in real estate beginning in fall 2020.
"We have a lot of faculty who do world-class research on real estate topics. A lot of our trustees are people who built Orange County. Our alumni provide great connections and intellectual expertise. We are pulling all that together to become the place that builds the next set of leaders in real estate," Turk says.
With the growth of the school has come leadership in industries. Data is paramount now, which is why the Argyros School continues to grow its computational programs.
Through it all, the important principles that George Argyros himself established 20 years ago still endure.
"Generally, a business degree isn't to prepare you for a particular industry," Turk says. "It prepares you to think strategically, to support your ideas, analyze them with all the data available and to build consensus, so you can get something done."
Which is exactly what the Argyros School itself has done in abundance over the past two decades. Maybe even nine times over.
Anniversary Celebration
The Chapman University School of Business was founded in 1974, but in 1999 it officially became the George L. Argyros School of Business and Economics, thanks to a transformational gift made by Julianne and The Honorable George Argyros '59. His generosity set in motion a new era of growth and achievement in business education.
This fall, Chapman celebrates this milestone anniversary with a special visit by President George W. Bush, who will be guest of honor at the celebration. In addition to his visionary contributions to higher education, George Argyros was appointed by President Bush and served as U.S. ambassador to Spain and Andorra from 2001-2004.
Over the past year, the Argyros School has welcomed a slate of other distinguished guest speakers whose areas of expertise highlight the interests, impact and contributions of George Argyros.
A Conversation About International Economics with Nigel Farage
In partnership with the Center for the Study of War and Society in Wilkinson College of Arts, Humanities, and Social Sciences, the Argyros School welcomed British politician Nigel Farage to campus in October. The visit was made possible by Shannon and George Argyros Jr. '89 (JD '01). Farage spent time throughout his visit to campus discussing international economics with faculty, students, alumni and special guests.
A Conversation About Sports Leadership with Jeanie Buss
When you're the chief executive officer of one of the most successful NBA teams of all time, you're bound to have insights into an industry that can turn on player injuries, management changes and fan loyalty. In the spring semester, a joint effort with the Fowler school of Law brought to campus Lakers controlling owner Jeanie Buss, who participated in a wide ranging conversation. Buss offered advice to others aiming for sports management careers.
"It's a very competitive world out there," said Buss. "Every skill set you can acquire is going to help you excel in the career you choose. When you're young and have the energy, take all the opportunities that you can. Even if it's something you don't think you want to do, expose yourself to it so you understand how important it is."
A Conversation About Leadership with Andrew Card
Andrew Card, the man who was at President Bush's side on Sept. 11, 2001, understands what it takes to be a leader in challenging times. In his talk at the Argyros School this spring, the former chief of staff for President Bush told students that leadership begins when other viewpoints are heard.
"Make the 'we' as inclusive as it can be for our great country. In today's world 'we' includes more individuals than when the Constitution was written, and it can still be improved and expanded," said Card, who also served as deputy chief of staff for President George H. W. Bush.
ARGYROS FAMILY
A Tradition of Leadership
Take a stroll through the heart of Chapman University and you'll see a campus that is transformed because a young couple met 60 years ago at the old Snack Shop on the corner of Chapman Avenue and Shaffer Street.
George L. Argyros '59 was already a determined young man, putting himself through college by working long hours at a supermarket while earning a degree in business and economics. But he still had to eat, and it was when he stopped into a restaurant a few blocks from campus that he saw a dark-haired beauty on a date with someone else. They married three years later, in 1962, and today Julianne is president of both Arnel, the company founded by George after graduating college, and the Argyros Family Foundation. Today, Arnel is one of the largest privately owned, diversified real estate and investment companies in the world.
The family's generosity at Chapman is visible. Walk west from the Argyros Forum Student Union and you'll pass the Julianne Argyros Fitness Center, the Ambassador George L. Argyros '59 Global Citizens Plaza and Julianne Argyros Fountain, the Julianne Argyros Orchestra Hall in Musco Center for the Arts, and, of course, the Argyros School of Business and Economics.
In the two decades since the business school was named for one of the most successful real estate entrepreneurs in Southern California history, the Argyros School's reputation has continued to grow. Now Chapman is launching a "50 for 50" campaign. The goal is to propel the Argyros School into the top 50 in the U.S. News & World Report business school rankings by raising $50 million, thus increasing the school's total endowment to $100 million. (Go to: chapman.edu/asbe20)
"The meaning of success for me is giving back," George Argyros has said. "Every individual can make a difference. Once you see these young people that we're helping, and you see the difference you're making in their lives, it energizes you to want to do more."
Argyros – whose business ventures included owning the airline AirCal and Major League Baseball's Seattle Mariners – was instrumental in transforming the tiny Chapman College he attended into a bustling university. After becoming a member of Chapman's Board of Trustees in 1973, he left an indelible impact as the longest-serving chairman of Chapman's board, leading it from 1976-2001. He resigned to serve President George W. Bush as U.S. ambassador to Spain and Andorra from 2001-04 and remains an emeritus chair of the Chapman board.
Carrying on the vision of Julianne and George, daughter Lisa Argyros '07 is a current Chapman trustee. Son George Argyros Jr. '89 (JD '01) supports the Board of Counselors for the Argyros School and is a Chapman President's Cabinet member. Another daughter, Stephanie Argyros, is a University of Southern California trustee.
The family has supported education, the arts and other philanthropic efforts not only throughout Southern California but across the nation with an extraordinary array of major gifts. For example, the Argyros Family is participating in the University of Southern California's restoration of the Los Angeles Memorial Coliseum and its iconic peristyle end, where the flame was lit for the 1932 and 1984 Olympic Games. The many Orange County institutions that have benefited from the Argyros family's philanthropy include the Segerstrom Center for the Arts, CHOC Children's Hospital, the Richard Nixon Foundation, Discovery Science Center, South Coast Repertory, the Orangewood Foundation, Boy Scouts, Girl Scouts and the Orange County School of the Arts.
National efforts have included support of the George W. Bush Presidential Center and the Horatio Alger Association, of which George Argyros is chairman emeritus. A $15 million gift to the organization from the Argyros family helped launch a national college scholarship program for veterans who served in Iraq and Afghanistan.
Other beneficiaries of the couple's generosity are far too many to list.
As former President George H.W. Bush once said of Ambassador Argyros in a video tribute: "George, how proud you must be. Your example is the kind of volunteer spirit that truly epitomizes the concept of being one of a thousand points of light."
More than One Path to a Doctorate at Chapman
Vaccination Is Best Protection Against Measles, Say Chapman Health Experts
Chapman Economic Forecast Projects Pent-Up Demand to Fuel 5.7% Growth in 2021
The coronavirus pandemic has been unlike anything the U.S. has seen before, but the period just around the bend will swoosh in with a bit of déjà vu, say Chapman University economists. Think post World War II and the...
Chapman CADS Student Masters Data Science to Improve Patient Care
When Matthew Nwerem '20 (MS '21) was a child, his computer was a gateway to fun and games. Now it's a tool for research that is opening doors to a method of medicine with the potential to change lives. Nwerem wants to...
Positive Media Psychologist Sees a Bright Side to the Connections We Make Online
It's the little things that count, right? Would you believe that extends to social media? It's true, says a Chapman University professor and psychologist who studies positive media psychology. That torrent of...


text:
Why Smart Clothes Still Need Work
Smart clothes promise better fitness tracking and feedback, but they need alterations, especially for women.
By Jill Duffy
https://www.pcmag.com/news/why-smart-clothes-still-need-work
Imagine a bra that reads your heart rate, pants that monitor your workout, and socks that help you run in better form. Smart clothing, or clothes embedded with sensors that give real-time feedback about our bodies and health, is one of the most promising categories of consumer technology today, at least conceptually speaking. In reality, however, smart clothes are way off the mark.
For the past two years, I've worn, tested, and written about a wide variety of smart clothing, and I'm torn as to whether most of it ever will succeed in the marketplace. On one hand, I am enthusiastic about how smart clothes could change our health and improve our lives.
When compared with activity trackers, which are typically worn around the wrist, smart clothes make a lot of sense. Why buy a wristband that only does one thing when you can get the same function out of the sports bra that you were going to wear anyway?
On the other hand, most of the clothes are terrible. By that, I mean that most of the clothes aren't hitting the bar in terms of being clothing I want to wear. The fit is off. Nothing is stylish. And forget about choosing colors or patterns. In short, they're bad women's wear. Even from a user experience perspective on the technology side, the feedback they provide is rarely, if ever, positive. Smart clothes only give you raw data or tell you what you're doing wrong.
Women have a fraught relationship with fashion. The right clothes can boost a woman's self-esteem, but the way clothes are advertised and marketed feeds women's insecurities about their bodies. What's wrong with you that you don't fit the size and cut of these clothes? Think for a moment about that existing and complicated relationship between a woman and her clothes, and now add sensors that literally judge her body all day long.
Hearing about what smart clothes can do and seeing their sexy advertisements don't actually convey what it feels like to wear them. I can't speak for every woman or every smart clothing wearer, but I can share some of the mixed emotions I experienced while running around in a smart bra, shirt, pair of pants, and socks.
The Importance of Fit
My first experience with smart clothing was the Sensoria Sports Bra ( at Amazon) . It looks like a typical sports bra but it has special conductive thread woven into the lower band that measures heart rate. Two snaps in the lower center hold a heart rate–monitoring device, which transmits data wirelessly to a workout app.
A sports bra is the most logical piece of clothing to make smarter. Seeing as women are going to wear a sports bra when they work out anyway, shouldn't it do double-duty? Chest-strap heart rate sensors must be tight around the rib cage and damp to work properly, and a sports bra is already snug where it needs to be and usually a little bit sweaty. I was gung-ho for smart sports bras.
I measured myself and should have fit a size small, but it was so tight around my armpits that I upgraded to a size medium, which wasn't much better. My back also felt restricted where a large expanse of compression fabric needlessly hugged my skin. Was the bra poorly designed, or was I misshapen? Either way, I was reminded of how badly the bra fit every time I inhaled deeply.
Since I first tried the Sensoria bra two years ago, the company has improved the cut and sizing, and gotten rid of an ugly green logo that used to be on the front. Unfortunately, the bra still only comes in all-black. Although men might assume that women don't care how their sports bras look, considering that they're usually hidden until a shirt, it's just not true.
Not long after I peeled off the Sensoria, an expensive smart shirt arrived for me to try. Hexoskin's shirt ( at Amazon) was also all black (sigh), but much more complicated than the bra. It measures heart rate, steps, and breathing, and it even has a function for tracking sleep, although I couldn't imagine wearing it to bed.
I flipped the shirt inside out and noticed a built-in sports bra and a number of sensors around the chest and waist. I pulled the shirt over my head and looked down to see no support for the bra whatsoever. Additionally, because the sensors needed to make contact with my skin, I couldn't put my own bra underneath to make up for it. Fail.
Fit aside, the device itself didn't seem as futuristic as I imagined smart clothes should be. I had to charge a little data-transmitting device, and then plug it into a cable inside the shirt—physical wires in a "wireless" world.
Around the same time that the Sensoria bra made its debut, Adidas, partnering with Numetrix, released a similar bra, the miCoach Seamless Sports Bra ($54.95). It costs so much less than the $139 Sensoria bra because it doesn't include the heart rate monitoring device. Buying one separately costs about $60. The Adidas miCoach bra is, regrettably, an ordinary sports bra by all other standards, but at least it comes in a few different colors: white, black, red, berry blast, and electric blue. The company lululemon, which has a much stronger track record making fashionable activewear that also fits women's bodies, also took a stab at a smart sports bra, but it is no longer on the market.
Clothes as Coach
By the time I shimmied my way into a pair of Athos' smart pants ($348), I was becoming skeptical about the utility of smart clothes. The pants proved me wrong, in both how well they fit and in the kind of information they delivered.
These (all-black!) capris for women or bicycle shorts for men have electromyography sensors, which are the most intriguing and useful technology I've encountered in smart clothes. They measure electrical activity produced by skeletal muscles—in other words, they tell you how hard your muscles are working. The sensors track the glutes, inner and outer quadriceps, and hamstrings, as well as your heart rate. On the inside of the pants I could see the sensors, which looked like nothing more than patches of thicker fabric. There were no wires or cords like the ones I'd seen in the Hexoskin shirt. The data is sent to a core that snaps into the pants on one side and relays the collected data to a Bluetooth-connected mobile app.
I climbed stairs, lunged, squatted, kicked my legs, and even pedaled on a stationary bike. During my workout, the app showed me in real time how hard my muscles were working and whether I favored one side of my body over the other. That's the kind of detailed, high-tech output I expect from smart clothes, because it let me make changes when I needed to. Because the feedback they give is both objective and actionable, the pants are more like a coach than a data collector, and working out with them is kind of exhilarating.
Athos also sells shirts that measure muscle activity and are equally well-fitted. But I can't say I recommend the shirt unless you have the abs of a swimsuit model; the one I tried on found every possible fold around my tummy and rode up until my skin was exposed. The outfit was so form-fitting, I looked as if I was suiting up for a motion-capture session, only without the ball markers. The pants still felt good, and the upper half of the shirt was supportive, as compression clothes should be, but the whole ensemble was a bit much.
Too Much Feedback
Last spring, I trained for and completed my first half marathon, and before I ran those 13.1 miles, I learned a lot about my running form thanks to a pair of smart socks from Sensoria ($179.99), the same company that makes the smart sports bras. Similar to the Athos pants, the socks gave me actional feedback in real time—but they gave me too much feedback.
Pressure-sensitive thread is knitted into the socks' fabric, as is conductive fiber that transmits information to a Bluetooth-enabled ankle cuff. The socks read pressure under your feet, which means they can tell if you're heel-striking or running on the balls of your feet as you should. Proper running form prevents injuries. The ankle cuff, which attaches to a row of embedded magnetic studs at the top of the sock, contains motion sensors that also track running speed and distance. A companion app pulls all the data together to make sense of it.
Before running in the socks, which are the thickest and most plush I've ever worn, I used the app to customize the desired landing point on my foot as well as my preferred cadence. Then I popped in some earbuds and set out with a metronome feature enabled. Tick, tick, tick. I ran to this rhythm I had programmed. Pretty soon, an automated voice yelled at me that I was not landing on the ball of my foot, and that I should correct my form or take a break. I corrected my form, but a few minutes later, the same automated lady yelled at me again, with the same exact speech. The sixth time she yelled at me, I'd had it.
See, I'm not a great runner, and a few words of encouragement mixed in with all the negative feedback would have gone a long way. The feedback was admittedly correct. I was running improperly. But I was tired of hearing it. In the end, though, the socks were just too comfortable to give up.
The Importance of Activewear
Most of the smart clothing I've worn falls into the fitness apparel category, which is single-handedly the most important category of clothing by sales. In 2014, sales growth of activewear exceeded that of the entire apparel market, according to NPD, and women are the primary purchasers. For smart clothing to succeed, it needs to be one with this flourishing market, which means it has to appeal to women. Sadly, a few smart clothing lines, such as the OMsignal Up & Running Kit ( at Amazon) and the Ralph Lauren PoloTech Smart Shirt ( at Amazon) , don't even have options for women, though OMsignal—a technology company that partners with fashion brands to make smart clothing—claims to have a late-stage prototype of a smart sports bra in the works. The company was founded in 2011 and this bra, five years later, would be its first item for women.
"From a style and fashion perspective, if you look at the players in the market that have had phenomenal growth, you see products that are designed for a woman's body and are in line with the fashion trends," said Shaz Kahng, chief marketing officer for OMsignal, which is one of the companies with a smart clothing line that currently leaves out womenswear entirely. Perhaps that's one reason Kahng was brought into OMsignal in late 2015.
Kahng is no newcomer to the fitness apparel world. She is a former business director for Nike and was president of Lucy Activewear for nearly two years. She unabashedly told me a story that exemplifies how the female perspective just isn't taken into account in developing activewear. "At Nike, when I was there, they wanted to create the best sports bra ever," she said. The company sunk a lot of time and money into studies and tests that would inform the bra's construction. But in the end, "it was designed by men, and it didn't fit properly," Kahng said. "It was extremely difficult to fasten, and it was priced at $80. So, you have a product that's not great, and it's the most expensive bra on the market."
For women, fit, form, and function matter, but so does style. Kahng agrees that even when women wear a top over their sports bra, "it has to look cute." Other details, such as whether the fabric is breathable and whether the size is adjustable (straps with sliders, snaps, hooks—this isn't rocket science), matter as well. Women have set a high bar for athletic wear, and as consumers, they are intolerant of products that fall short.
A similar lack of understanding of women's bodies has been a problem in the smartwatch category, too. The original Pebble smartwatch looked enormous on me, and I happen to have large wrists. There's really no mistaking the LG G Watch R ( at Amazon) as a man's wristwatch. And when a petite friend of mine put on the smallest-size Microsoft Band, she looked as though she was wearing handcuffs.
What message does it send when new wearable devices are made only for men? Including the female perspective in development, design, and marketing is less a matter of gender imbalance in the industry (a perpetual problem in its own right) and more related to researching the demographics of the prospective market. Smart clothing makers need to embrace women as their primary customers and support them as early adopters. Smart clothes needs to be as good at being clothes as they are at being smart, and to do that, they need to be made for women.
How Does Your Clothing Talk To You?
Smart clothing is meant to empower us by giving us more data about ourselves. As a woman who has worn smart clothing, however, my experience is that it comes with a hyperawareness of being critiqued, made worse by the fact that much of it is ill-fitting, poorly designed, or just plain ugly.
If the purpose of smart clothing, at least at this stage in its development, is to help us live better through improving the quality of workouts and our health over the long term, then the message from the clothes needs to encourage positive behavior. The clothes themselves have to make us feel good.
In time, the purpose of smart clothes will undoubtedly stretch well beyond pumping iron and running faster. Davide Vigano, cofounder of Sensoria, told me his company partners with medical groups to find new uses for the pressure-sensitive thread found in Sensoria's running socks. For example, when a diabetic patient has a skin graft on the foot (usually to prevent an amputation), the patient is not supposed to walk on the area for a few days. But because diabetics often have reduced sensitivity in their extremities, it's hard for them to remember to stay off their feet, and many end up getting an amputation later regardless, which is both traumatic and expensive. A pressure-sensitive bandage could help remind the patient to stay off the treated foot by monitoring post-op behavior.
But even in the case of medical use, we have to want to wear smart clothes. The experience needs to be positive.
"The philosophy has to be more of a coach and a helper than a judge," said Kahng. "I was just in a meeting, and a woman was saying, 'I feel judged every day. I feel like I have to be perfect every day.' Women will take care of everyone else around them and take care of themselves last. The message with smart clothing is you have to take care of yourself first because you can't help anyone else if you're not in a healthy state."
From my trials with smart clothing, I absolutely see the need to include positive feedback and encouragement to counter-balance all the negative feedback and raw data. More important, women have to be a part of the creation and selling of smart clothes, from their initial design and development to beta testing to marketing the final product. The clothes need to be stylish, fitted for real bodies, comfortable, and affordable. Unless women are purposefully included in every step, the smart clothing movement will never get off the ground.
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About Jill Duffy
Jill Duffy is the deputy managing editor of the Software team at PCMag. She has been writing for and contributing to the site since 2011, covering productivity apps and software, as well as technologies for health and fitness. She writes the Get Organized column, with tips on how to lead a better digital life.
Her latest book is The Everything Guide to Remote Work. Follow her on Twitter or get in touch on the Jill Duffy contact page.
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Here we're cutting the 0.040" 2024 T3 AlClad aluminum for the rear street-side lower panel replacement. Our previous panel was really beat up and rather than putting all the time on an English wheel to straighten it out, we elected to just replace the panel. This one is a little thicker compared to the original panel that was 0.032" thickness. After making a template from the old panel with cardboard, we marked up our panel and got to work! Here I'm using the Harbor Freight 18 gauge, 3.5 amp heavy duty metal shears. They cut through the aluminum like butter.
As we had previously posted, we had a new piece of a aluminum cut at Discount Steel and we received delivery today. Those with a discerning eye will identify that the piece is like a U-shape that encompasses the rear window. This isn't exactly like the original. When Jim did the shell-off restoration of the frame and the flooring, the new flooring ended up being a tad bit wider than the original. Because of that, the rear of the shell didn't fit exactly back together where it was originally riveted. Now, most would say, "Hey, that's not good", well, in this case it's actually okay with me. I like the idea of this new aluminum, which I purchased at a slightly thicker grade than original (.040 vs. .032) will support the window better. Also, the rivet holes that were drilled in the rear are a little too big for my comfort in the original pieces so this new piece will cover them over. All in a good day's work!


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