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Author: tina shepardson
Teddy's Precious Gift
September 10, 2022 tina shepardson
We are thrilled to have author Michelle Nott with us today. This fall, her newest picture book releases, Teddy, Let's Go!, and illustrated by Nahid Kazemi. She shares such a beautiful story about a Grandmother giving her newborn grandchild a teddy bear she made herself. Teddy takes the reader on an unforgettable adventure about love and friendship.
Tina: Thank you for visiting today, Michelle! This is a precious story to share. Whether drafting or revising, how do you know when it is necessary to show action, scene and sensory elements?
Michelle: Thanks for having me! When I'm drafting a new picture book, I write it all out as it comes to mind without stopping to really edit. Once I have the full story in front of me, I know my characters, their emotional arc, and the story arc, then I start cutting anything that would be easily shown in the illustrations. If a detail is necessary to have in an image but is not obvious from the text, then I will add an illustration note.
Every action, scene, and sensory element must move the story forward. There is no room for extra words, no matter how beautifully written or how funny they are. It can be hard to cut favorite lines (I cut and paste them into another document to save them). But for the sake of story, only keep what is essential.
Try to keep these questions in mind:
Does the action add to the understanding of the character and/or move the story forward?
Does a particular scene provide essential information about the characters or forward the plot in such a way that could not be incorporated anywhere else?
As for sensory elements, do they add to or distract from the character development or narrative?
Tina: Those are great suggestions, and often easier said than done. Are there specific strategies, tools or resources you use to incorporate more showing/descriptive language?
Michelle: Yes, before writing picture books, I wrote and published poetry. So, I like to use poetic devices to enhance my writing. I find that having a background in poetry has helped me keep a close eye on word count and how to say as much as I can with as few words as possible.
For example, in my debut picture book Teddy Let's Go!, which is told from a teddy bear's point of view, I wanted the reader to understand immediately that a grandmother has made this precious gift and that the teddy feels how much love she has given him to pass on. Without saying all that outright, my first line is simply, "The wavy-haired woman with love in her eyes pulled me close and whispered in my ear." From that one line, the illustrator created four images, three of which lead up to it.
Tina: What a gorgeous first line. Would you like to share an example of a before and after where you needed to show more and found the right words to paint the image for the reader?
Michelle: Of course, to follow up on my previous answer, the following lines are rather an example of where I was telling too much in a very early draft (from 2012):
"With every paw [the grandmother] sewed, she smiled. With every arm attached, she laughed.
And with stiff fingers, she stuffed me with all the love she had. Up into my ears. Around my belly. Down to my toes. The opening was just under my bum. She patched it with a label:
'Specially hand-made by Grandma.'"
All those lines became simply:
"The wavy-haired woman with love in her eyes pulled me close and whispered in my ear."
Everything I had written in that earlier draft of this scene was long cut before I ever queried my agent. In the end, however, Nahid Kazemi's illustrations brilliantly convey everything I had wanted to express, and without illustration notes.
When writing stories, we must keep in mind to "show, don't tell." But I think we also need to remember to "show just enough, and don't tell." Never underestimate the imagination of the reader nor that of the illustrator.
Tina: An excellent point. The illustrations show as much heart as your writing. Your words and her art blend perfectly. Writing is about balance. How do you know you've got it just right? What tips or suggestions do you have for writers in terms of striving for that balance of showing versus telling?
Michelle: Storyboarding my manuscript helps me balance what to show and what to tell. Even though my characters are stick figures and my trees look like lollipops, it's really helpful to imagine how the story could appear on the page. As I do this, I can more easily see what lines actually work best as illustrations and, therefore, do not need to be written out. There shouldn't be any redundancy between the images and the text.
Tina: That's a really strong strategy. Thank you for sharing such valuable information and strategies. Wishing you and Teddy every success as his story enters the world!
Michelle Nott is a former educator (pre-K to 12, French and Creative Writing), freelance editor, published poet, and children's book author. She writes fiction and nonfiction, in prose and verse. She has authored two early readers, Freddy, Hoppie and the Eyeglasses and Dragon Amy's Flames. Her debut picture book, Teddy Let's Go!, releases this fall from Enchanted Lion Books .
Michelle grew up in the U.S. and has lived in Europe for extended periods of time. She holds American and French citizenship and is bilingual, English and French. Her extensive travel around the U.S., Europe, and Africa fuels her imagination and appreciation for story, art, and world cultures.
You can find Michelle online at:
You can pre-order your copy here:
Tagged #childhood, #grandmother, #grandparents, #handmade, #kidlit, #madewithlove, #milestones, #newsibling, #picturebook, #teddybear, #writingcommunity, @2021WordBirds, @enchantedlion, @NahidNKazemi56, @nahid_kazemi_visual_poems, @stormliterary, @tinashepardson, Tina ShepardsonLeave a comment
A True Story: GOOD IN THE MIDST OF EVIL
April 3, 2022 tina shepardson
Today we have a special guest, friend and critique partner, Yvona Fast. She shares the emotional story of her mother's childhood experiences during the Holocaust in her upcoming middle grade book, GOOD IN THE MIDST OF EVIL, with Clear Fork Publishing. Dana Fast is one of many whose personal experiences during such a horrific time, have given her the strength she has today.
TS: Welcome, Yvona! I am so excited to read your book and hear about how your mother's important story came to be. Her experiences help us understand our world's history, especially such difficult times.
AF: Thank you, Tina. Yes, they really do!
When I was growing up and we studied history and the Holocaust, I would ask Mom questions – I knew she had lived through it – but she never would talk about it. It was only later, when I was in my forties that she started talking.
Her brother – who is 5 years younger – asked her to write it down for his kids, since he remembered so little, being so young. This was in the 1990s. I was in Europe working in Yugoslavia, Poland and Slovakia from 1989 – 1995, and she typed it on our friend Olga's word processor… it wasn't even a computer back then. I just recently came across this early draft when cleaning out the filing cabinet.
Her friends in Poland wanted to read it – so she wrote it in Polish for them, using the same word processor…
When I came back to the states, I read both versions – and they were not identical. She recalled different things each time.
TS: Wow, so fascinating. I am sure after so many years, sitting down to write the difficult memories in both languages must have been very challenging.
AF: This really inspired me to want to share her story. I was living and working in Rochester, NY, then, and combined both versions into one, editing as I went. I tried submitting the story to publishers, but there was no interest.
A few years later, in 2010, a friend of Mom's, Andrea, asked if she could write mom's story down. She was on the board of the Polish-Jewish Heritage Society in Montreal, Quebec, and they were looking for Holocaust stories to publish.
We told her the story was already written – and in 2011 they published it, with only minor edits, under the title, MY NINE LIVES. When I said we wanted a thousand copies, they thought we were crazy… but we have sold most of them. The nonprofit only publishes the books, but they do not distribute them, so the only way to get a copy is either through the agency or through us.
Mom is well-known in our community, since she has worked here and lived here and volunteered for various organizations from the local library to the Visitor's Interpretive Center, and served as a Master Gardener Volunteer for years, giving talks on gardening, composting, preserving food, and so on. Over a hundred people came to her book release party.
TS: She is amazing! You must be so proud of her.
AF: I really am. But I wanted a wider market for the book, beyond our small village. Since there are about a dozen books with the title MY NINE LIVES, I wanted a unique title that fit. A friend, Karen Davidson, designed a more engaging cover. These are things that are important to book marketing… the cover and the title.
A friend offered to help me publish it through Amazon's KDP (Kindle Direct Publishing) but part-way through she dropped the project. Her Apple computer and my IBM version did not seem to work together well. That's when I sent a copy of MY NINE LIVES to Caliie Metler of Clear Fork Publishing. She loved the book and offered to publish it under the Rise Imprint – books that empower women and teach them to rise.
TS: Yvona, how wonderful for your mother and your family to be able to do this for her. Great thinking on your part to submit her story to Clear Fork and the RISE Imprint is a perfect fit.
AF: My mom, Dana, is definitely a strong, independent woman. Her life made her that way.
I say she wrote the book – it is her story. She claims I wrote it. I definitely edited and improved it, but the story and voice are clearly hers.
TS: Something tells me both of you are sharing this important history, together. We wish you every success as the release her incredible story releases Tuesday, April 5th!
Yvona Fast grew up on three continents, speaking three languages by age ten. She thought many of her challenges were due to these changes in culture, but in her forties she discovered she is neurodivergent and needs words – not pictures – to understand her world, a condition known as Nonverbal Learning Disability.
Her love of books and language first led her to become a librarian, and later, to writing. She has written articles and essays, writes a weekly food column for her local paper, the Adirondack Daily Enterprise, and has published several books, including three poetry chapter books. Her first book, Employment for Individuals with Asperger Syndrome or Non-Verbal Learning Disability, was published in 2004 by Jessica Kingsley Publishers.
Learn more about Yvona and her writing at www.yvonafast.com. Follow her on Twitter at yvonawrites, or on Facebook at Words Are My World or Author Yvona Fast.
To order the book, visit:
Clear Fork Publishing
Tagged Candice Marley Conner, Clear Fork Publishing, Gabrielle Schoeffield, Katharine Derrick, Picture books, Sandra Sutter, Tina Shepardson, Wonder of Words, Yvona Fast3 Comments
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Everything You Wanted To Know About Underwear And More!
January 15, 2022 January 15, 2022 tina shepardson
Happy New Year Everyone! We are excited to have Christine Van Zandt on our blog today. I saw her new nonfiction book, A BRIEF HISTORY OF UNDERPANTS, illustrated by Harry Briggs, online and the cover intrigued me. Then I read, laughed, and learned from the first page to the last. What topic accomplishes both of these consistently? Underpants of course. Who doesn't like learning about underwear? How about what they cover…tushes, old crusty buns? Each chapter is filled with content-based words, facts, images, history, and humor.
TS: Welcome Christine! Your book is a terrific example of nonfiction material kids will love reading. This can be such a funny, awkward, and embarrassing topic for kids. Whether drafting or revising, how do you know when it is necessary to show action, scene, and sensory elements?
CVZ: Thanks, Tina for having me. Knowing when to show action, scene, and sensory elements is something that comes with practice: writing, reading, and studying the craft. Word choice plays a big role.
Each story is different, therefore, the focus on action, scene, and sensory elements varies. Identify what you want to accomplish with each manuscript. Let's say your picture book is in rhyme. There are many variations from there. Is it a soothing bedtime book or upbeat? Lyrical? Cumulative? And don't even get me started on all the different kinds of rhyme schemes! Once you've figured out the foundation (structure, plot), then fine-tune the text.
TS: You raise great points. The preplanning aspect for each story is important. Are there specific strategies, tools or resources you use to incorporate more showing/descriptive language?
CVZ: A tried-and-true method is to go through your manuscript, reviewing only the verbs. Look for "is," "was," and "be," then replace them with more precise verbs. Instead of "The dog was chased by the cat," saying "The cat chased the dog" gets right to the point without extra words and it shows the action more effectively.
How a sentence is arranged can place emphasis on where you want the reader to focus.
Example 1: Cats are liked by more people than any other pet.
(The emphasis is on "cats.")
Example 2: People like cats more than any other pet.
(The emphasis is on "people.")
TS: That's an awesome strategy to use for strengthening a sentence. I'll implement that more often in revisions. Would you like to share an example of a before and after where you needed to show more and found the right words to paint the image for the reader?
CVZ: Absolutely. Here is the opening scene to a picture book I'm working on.
FIRST DRAFT (BEFORE)
I wasn't going to eat her, even though I easily could. [POV = first-person, mountain lion]
I came down from the hills because I heard her [Suki, the kitten] crying.
CURRENT DRAFT (AFTER)
Everyone calls me P-22 but my real name is Leonardo Catamount. I'm as famous as the Hollywood sign, but a lot more ferocious.
All animals fear me. They run and hide when I am near. [sun is setting]
But what is that?!
When I drafted this story about the mountain lion and his unlikely (eventual) friendship with a city cat, I jumped into it too quickly. This made the first lines problematic in the same way starting with dialogue can confuse a reader when they don't yet know the character.
TS: The difference between the two is amazing. Fleshing out details takes time and patience. Thanks for the example. Writing is about balance. How do you know you've got it just right? What tips or suggestions do you have for writers in terms of striving for that balance of showing versus telling?
CVZ: I belong to several critique groups and their feedback is critical. When it's not just right, they let me know!
In picture books it may seem counterintuitive that writers focus on showing rather than telling (because picture books are illustrated), however, illustrations should take the story beyond the text, adding another layer of interest. Therefore, for writers, word choice is important.
Of course there are a huge range of manuscripts. For some genres or categories, it's fine to tell more than show, much depends on what you are writing. Identifying a goal for each project can save time when revising. And, remember that it's okay to change your mind and go in a new direction—it's your story!
TS: I couldn't agree with you more. Critique partners are invaluable. Thank you for sharing so many wonderful strategies. Wishing you every success and looking forward to future books! Happy writing everyone this first month of 2022!
GIVEAWAY: For a chance to win an autographed copy of A BRIEF HISTORY OF UNDERPANTS, follow both Christine and I on Twitter, retweet the post, and reply in the comments below that you have done so. (Twitter: @ChristineVZ and @ShepardsonTina We will select a winner on Tuesday, January 18th, at noon, EST.
All book-related images provided by becker&mayer! kids.
Image provided by Marlena Van Zandt.
Christine Van Zandt is the author of the funny nonfiction picture book, A Brief History of Underpants. She's a literary editor and lives in Los Angeles, California, with her family and a monarch butterfly sanctuary
You can find Christine online at:
Website: https://christinevanzandt.com/
Twitter: @ChristineVZ
Instagram: christinevanzandt9
Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/christine.vanzandt.9
LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/christine-van-zandt/
Friendship and Empathy: Helping A Friend Who Has Experienced Trauma
October 9, 2021 tina shepardson
Have you ever wondered how some authors take heavy topics and show their story in a way that helps others be more mindful of others' feelings? Joanna Rowland is very experienced in this area and in her newest picture book, Big Bear Was Not The Same, she accomplishes just this! Beautifully illustrated by John Ledda, Joanna and John show readers how to be more empathetic and supportive to a friend who has experienced a traumatic event. I'm so glad Joanna could stop by to talk about her book today!
TS: Hi Joanna! Your book is such a good reminder of how to be there for someone. Whether drafting or revising, how do you know when it is necessary to show action, scene and sensory elements?
JR: One of the things I love about picture books is that illustrators can show so much through their illustrations that I don't need to tell. I have one line, "Little Bear tried all sorts of things to cheer up Big Bear. But nothing worked." It was so fun to see the ways illustrator John Ledda used to show Little Bear trying to cheer up Big Bear. I don't need to tell the reader in words what was happening because they can see it in the pictures. Because the story I wrote is about trauma and responses to trauma, it was important for me to sometimes say the action. One example: "Oh, no! said Big Bear, and he ran away." I felt it was important to say the action when it was a response to trauma to help kids better understand how someone might act when they are traumatized. In Big Bear Was Not The Same, Big Bear has been traumatized by a forest fire. When things remind Big Bear of the forest fire, he responds with fight, flight, or freeze. It was important to show Big Bear having that action when things reminded him of the fire. I think learning about how people who have PTSD respond to things, helped me know I needed to have more action scenes when Big Bear was triggered.
When I was writing the story, my critique partners were great for letting me know if it felt like something was missing. My books are always better by seeing how they respond to what I write and their feedback.
TS: You made great decisions in those scenes especially because young kids are just learning about life and some of the difficulties they may experience. Are there specific strategies, tools or resources you use to incorporate more showing/descriptive language?
JR: Reading picture books is a great way to learn about language and craft. I read different picture books every day. One of the fabulous perks of teaching five-year-olds. I love reading lyrical books. Cynthia Rylant does a beautiful job of using descriptive language in her books.
When I'm trying to make a word list, I like Word Hippo https://www.wordhippo.com/
I also like looking up idioms here https://idioms.thefreedictionary.com/ I find idioms can be a fun way to help me think more creatively on how I want to use words.
TS: These are terrific resources. Thank you for sharing! Would you like to share an example of a before and after where you needed to show more and found the right words to paint the image for the reader?
JR: Sure, this is an Early draft of Big Bear text example with too much telling:
It was only a matter of time before something set off Big Bear to think and feel
like the day in the woods was happening all over.
Sometimes, a smell set off Big Bear.
And Big Bear ran away.
It was only campers having dinner. But Big Bear relived that scary moment in the woods anyway.
Final version of Big Bear text example:
Some days, Little Bear and Big Bear had good days that almost felt normal.
But one smell could change it all.
SNIFF
Big Bear froze.
"Don't worry, Big Bear. It's just kids making s'mores. You're so big and brave. Nothing can scare you. Right?"
But Big Bear shivered.
Little Bear worried. "Do you want a hug?"
But Big Bear didn't answer.
TS: I love the difference between the two versions. Much more emotion and heart in your final version! How do you know you've got it just right? What tips or suggestions do you have for writers in terms of striving for that balance of showing versus telling?
JR: I do learn from rejections. Pre agent, I used to send things out too soon occasionally, and if they didn't connect emotionally, I knew I needed to go back to find the heart. My critique group is great at letting me know when I've hit that right emotional chord. So, if you aren't in a critique group, find one. They are so valuable. Honestly some books can take me years to get right, and some weeks. Explore different structures with how to write your book, try writing it in different points of view, and revise. Big Bear took quite a few drafts because I wrote it in 3rd person and most of my other published books have been written in 1st person, so it was a learning curve for me to think about dialogue and how to write the action scenes in the book. Sometimes it's okay to tell. I felt it was important to say the words, "Big Bear froze," because freezing is one of the responses people have when they have been through a traumatic event. But I think leaving more room for the illustrator whenever possible, makes for a stronger book. See how other authors show the balance in published books. You will learn so much from reading. What showed the action? Was it dialogue, text, or the illustration? Have fun and don't be afraid to experiment. Copy your manuscript and practice deleting chunks to see if it's better with or without. Sometimes less words, is more powerful. But most importantly, keep trying
TS: Critique partners are those objective eyes and ears. Reading other books is such a great habit to develop, I agree. Wishing you continued success with Big Bear, Little Bear and future books. Thank you for stopping by!
Joanna Rowland grew up in Sacramento, California, where she still lives today with her husband and three children. She teaches kindergarten by day and writes picture books at night. In the summer you'll find her by water or cozying up with a book. She is the author of The Memory Box: A Book about Grief; The Memory Book: A Grief Journal for Children and Families; Stay Through The Storm; When Things are Hard, Remember; and Always Mom, Forever Dad.
You can find Joanna online at:
Website: https://www.writerrowland.com/
Twitter: @WriterRowland
Instagram: @writerrowland
Facebook: Joanna Rowland
Tagged book review, Candice Marley Conner, Gabrielle Schoeffield, joanna rowland, Katharine Derrick, Kidlit, Picture books, Sandra Sutter, Tina Shepardson, Wonder of Words, Yvona Fast6 Comments
Showing Through Real World Issues
July 21, 2021 tina shepardson
We have a real treat today! Welcome back to Annette Schottenfeld whose second picture book, OBI'S MUD BATH, just released with Clear Fork Publishing. Several stories are crafted from our own family experiences such as Annette's March release entitled NOT SO FAST, MAX: A ROSH HASHANAH VISIT WITH GRANDMA, and global issues that take hold our hearts such as OBI'S MUD BATH. Annette, welcome back and congratulations on your second release!
AS: Hi Tina! I'm thrilled to be here.
TS: Obi is such a lovable and endearing character. The reader finds himself rooting for Obi from the beginning. How did you develop Obi's character traits?
AS: Thank you Tina! When writing OBI'S MUD BATH, I wanted readers to genuinely care about the main character and his problem. After reading many picture books and making note of what drew me in, I worked on creating a voice for Obi that would tug at readers' hearts. My goal was for the little rhino to showcase his determination, playfulness, innocence, and belief that anything is possible.
I brought many versions of the story to my fabulous critique partners and Obi slowly became a recognizable character. Then, when I took The Craft and Business of Writing Picture Books at The Children's Book Academy during the summer of 2018, the Academy's founder, Dr. Mira Reisberg – who also became the editor and art director for OBI'S MUD BATH – fell in love with Obi and she, along with a critique group I was paired with in the class (which included you, Tina!), helped me define his voice further.
Dr. Reisberg selected and worked with Obi's super talented illustrator, Folasade Adeshida, who mirrored Obi's voice in her illustrations. The little rhino's expressions, body language, and movements created by Folasade perfectly paired with the voice my words had given him. The result was a character that readers could get behind!
TS: The unfolding of the illustrating process is so exciting! I loved meeting Obi in your early drafts. OBI'S MUD BATH is inspired by true events that took place in Zimbabwe. Could you share with us the connection?
AS: The idea for OBI'S MUD BATH began while I was reading a news article. On a scorching, hot day in Zimbabwe, a little rhino bull named Mark was searching for juicy greenery. Unfortunately, there was litter on the ground. His snout and horn became stuck in a tire, and he couldn't eat or drink. A team of vets came to his rescue and, thankfully, Mark made a full recovery.
The scene kept playing in my mind. I pictured the little rhino full of determination, exhausted, and then finally free. I envisioned a picture book that was not only fun to read, but that could also give back to help the environment. And Obi was born!
This is an example of how anything can spark a story idea and lead to something wonderful.
I wanted the book to make a difference on a larger scale, and a portion of the proceeds from OBI'S MUD BATH will be donated to Water.org, an organization which empowers families around the world with access to safe water and sanitation. Check out: Shop to Support .
To ensure that the book represented an accurate depiction of the landscape, wildlife, cultural appropriateness, and language of the area, Esau Mavindidze, a native of Zimbabwe and Shona language expert, was instrumental as a cultural sensitivity reader for OBI'S MUD BATH. Thank you Esau!
TS: What an amazing experience to have Esau share his insights! Obi's new friends are a diverse group of characters. How did you decide on these specific ones to compliment Obi's character and challenges?
AS: Yes, Obi's friends are certainly fun! They added another layer to the story and were crafted to help with pacing.
I researched animals found in Zimbabwe that were not predators of each other. There was no room for a scuffle!
Each of Obi's friends also has a distinct voice. The language they use, paired with their movements, tells readers a lot about them. They all add value to Obi's quest.
Rufaro, the ostrich, is gentle and offers Obi comfort.
Tenda, the giraffe, has better eyesight and a longer neck than Obi, to search for a mud bath.
Moyo, the elephant, is older and sympathizes with Obi.
Let's face it, we all need buddies to help us out occasionally. Showing readers the friends working together – teamwork – was an important concept to include. This is what leads Obi to come up with a solution to his problem.
TS: I agree! What do you hope will be the reader's lasting impression or message learned from reading Obi's story?
AS: I hope reading OBI'S MUD BATH leaves readers thinking about:
A determined young rhino…teamwork…believing…taking care of our environment…and, ooey, gooey mud!
TS: Thank you for sharing with us your process for showing such an important character like Obi!
Annette Schottenfeld is the author of Obi's Mud Bath (Spork – Clear Fork Publishing), illustrated by Folasade Adeshida and Not So Fast, Max: A Rosh Hashanah Visit with Grandma (Kalaniot Books), illustrated by Jennifer Kirkham.
Annette is passionate about writing for children, hip-hop dance, and environmental issues, believing all have the power to change lives. A registered dietitian and expert baker, she created the decadent Uglie Muffin. Shhh, the recipe is a secret! Annette lives in New York with her husband and two kids.
You can find Annette online on Twitter, Facebook, or annetteschottenfeld.com.
A Combination of Mythology and Modern Storytelling:
April 24, 2021 tina shepardson
Greek Mythology has long been a fascination with readers of every age level. Have you ever wondered what a Greek god or goddess was like as a child? Wait until you learn about Jennifer Buchet's debut picture book, Little Medusa's Hair Do-Lemma, illustrated by Cassie Chancy. We will have a whole new understanding on what it means to have a bad hair day!
ME: Jennifer, thank you for visiting our blog today! We are so excited to hear the behind the scenes details in creating this most adorable "Tiny Medusa"!
JB: Thank you for having me! Throughout my various careers, I've always been writing–everything from advertising copy to radio ads, websites to magazines and more. And since every medium has its own approach to words, I'm always learning something new! For example, the other week I heard the phrase "hedge words." Are these bushy evergreens laden with colorful verbiage? Not exactly, but I did learn why these hedges need trimming!
ME: I am always fascinated with the background of a writer! So interesting. Whether drafting or revising, how do you know when it is necessary to show action, scene and sensory elements?
JB: As picture book authors, every word counts. But that doesn't mean our stories have to be "no frills." Rather, each word and every sentence must move the story along. In my debut picture book, Little Medusa's Hair Do-Lemma, I originally began with this opening:
Little Medusa finally got her very first snake on her birthday. She was so excited, she danced and twirled around her room.
This does set the stage, but it's also wordy and rather bland (yucky first draft 101!). After several revisions, the opening now contains more action.
Little Medusa was delighted when she got her very first snake.
I love including sensory elements beyond what the character sees, like tasting, hearing and touching. For example, Little Medusa discovers she doesn't like having her new serpentine friend slither through her hair (can't really blame her!) This sets up the character's challenge, but I knew I needed to expand on that feeling, so I added these lines:
"…she couldn't fathom was so great about traditional Gorgon hair.
It was itchy.
It was buggy
And it was positively scaly when Addie shed her skin."
This is much more relatable and if the reader squirms even just a tiny bit, my job is done!
ME: You even succeed in hooking the reader with great suspense in your revised opening line. What a wonderful story line. Are there specific strategies, tools or resources you use to incorporate more showing/descriptive language?
JB: I allow myself to write wordy, adjective-filled, too-long, early drafts! Most of my drafts easily begin at 700w. Once I'm satisfied with the arc and character development, my inner editor comes out to play with all her highlighters.
Bam, change passive words to present! Bam, remove adverbs! Bam, delete hedge words, AKA those pesky filler words such as "usually; very; suddenly; almost."
I've also discovered that contests have helped me become a stronger writer. Contests challenge the muse and for those with limited word counts or quirky themes, they really challenge the brain! In fact, I love them so much that last year, I co-created the non-fiction contest #SunWriteFun.This challenge included both minimal word count and a summertime theme. Reading all those entries certainly inspired me and I know the contest inspired others!
ME: I completely agree. Reading others' writing is such great exposure to styles, structures, and just plain sensational stories. Would you like to share an example of a before and after where you needed to show more and found the right words to paint the image for the reader?
JB: In the climax of Little Medusa's Hair Do-Lemma, my heroine makes a really big decision. Like many of us, she begins to second-guess herself. Rather than describe how she's feeling with emotive adjectives (she was happy, sad, confused, doubtful, etc), I wrote the scene using physical actions.
Little Medusa bounced around the room.
Until the bouncing slowed to a jump, the jump to a hop
And Little Medusa became still as a statue.
Not only did this drill down big emotions for little readers, it also provided the illustrator (the talented Cassie Chancy) with oodles of room to work with. Bonus—that last phrase ties neatly into the whole Gorgon statue-turning talent!
ME: Oh my gosh, we are so excited to see the finished product! The illustrations are just precious! Writing is about balance. How do you know you've got it just right? What tips or suggestions do you have for writers in terms of striving for that balance of showing versus telling?
JB: If someone invented a timer for creatives that trumpeted "perfecto," they'd be rich! Sometimes it's hard to know when your story is just so. There are definitely fantastic checklists to use that ensure one has incorporated all the "write" elements, but I think in the end, it's a gut reaction. You know when your story is ready to share, whether with your critique group, your agent or editor, etc. As for finding that balance between show and tell, I believe it's an acquired skill for most. Read a lot and write even more, for as you hone your craft, you learn when those beautiful rosy words are really just hedges needing a trim.
ME: You have made so many valid points, Jennifer! Working on the craft of writing is definitely a rewarding journey we all make time for.
Learn more about Jennifer:
Jennifer Buchet is an award-winning author, pre-kindergarten educator and self-proclaimed foodie. Her kid lit career officially started in 2011, writing for Cricket Media. Today, she is a regular feature contributor for Faces magazine while also creating new picture books and chapter books.
Spare time is a rather elusive creature in her home, but when Jennifer does find it, she enjoys creating exotic meals, creating writing contests, crushing her family in games of Catan and searching for fey in the woodlands. Her debut picture book, LITTLE MEDUSA'S HAIR DO-LEMMA (Clear Fork Publishing) slithers onto shelves May 2021.
You can swap tales & recipes with Jennifer here:
Twitter @Yangmommy
Email: Buchetbooks@gmail.com
Website: buchetbooks.wixsite.com/mysite
A Multigenerational Story of Tradition, Renewal, and Hope:
As we all know, in addition to reading for sheer enjoyment, another is to learn about others, their cultures, and traditions. Annette Schottenfeld's debut picture book, NOT SO FAST, MAX: A Rosh Hashanah Visit With Grandma, illustrated by Jennifer Kirkham, does all of these! Annette shares how the seeds for this piece were planted years ago when her children were young, their Grandma visited, and all of them would go to the apple orchard. We are excited to share her journey of showing a beloved family tradition! In late May, Annette will be back to share her second picture book: Obi's Mud Bath (Spork – Clear Fork Publishing), illustrated by Folasade Adeshida, which releases this summer!
ME: Annette, thank you for visiting our blog today. NOT SO FAST, MAX: A Rosh Hashanah Visit With Grandma, will be out in the world very soon. We are very excited for you!
AS: Thank you for inviting me on your blog. I love the theme Best in Show!
ME: Whether drafting or revising, how do you know when it is necessary to show action, scene, and sensory elements?
AS: When I begin writing a story, I try not to limit myself with too many rules. I start with a base story structure, but I don't worry about creating magic in the first draft. This rarely happens. Then I go back and start the revision process, stripping down and simplifying the text. I like to see that the bones are solid.
Next comes the sparkle that brings the story to life. Since I am not an illustrator, I need to leave room for the artist to tell their end of the story as well. This means selecting each word strategically. Picture books have so few words and each one counts.
Here are some examples from NOT SO FAST, MAX: A Rosh Hashanah Visit With Grandma (Kalaniot Books, March 2021).
Action A sign next to my desk reads: Let Verbs do the Heavy Lifting.
Max followed along.
This does not tell the reader much about Max.
Let's try a more active and expressive verb:
Max stomped along.
Now we see there is something that Max is not happy about.
Scene Unless it matters to the storyline, certain elements of the scene should be left up to the illustrator. If the writer has done their job well, the illustrator will know how to portray the scene.
Each year when the leaves turned colors…
The reader (and illustrator) know it is fall.
Sensory Elements Considering all the senses – sight, smell, sound, taste, touch – when writing helps bring the story alive.
Thump! Plop!
Gravel crunched under the tires.
The branches created a cozy space.
These lines tug at the readers' senses.
ME: That is a great process and I love the sign about letting the verbs do the heavy lifting! Are there specific strategies, tools, or resources you use to incorporate more showing/descriptive language?
I create a character profile for each character in my story. Examples of things I might note: Do they have a unique hobby? What kind of a friend are they? Are they a morning person?
By getting to know my characters inside out I instinctively understand how they will react to certain situations. Their consistent actions and voice make them real, relatable, and reliable to readers.
placing words intentionally is another way to show what is happening in the story.
Let's take a look at some examples from OBI'S MUD BATH (Spork Books, Summer 2021).
Once again, the friends
yanked and yanked,
huffed and puffed,
and little by little
the tire loosened,
until FLUMP it was off.
In the example above, breaking out the words slows the action and sets the pace. You can see the effort that the characters are putting into this.
And then, just when he thought he couldn't go any further…
By using an ellipsis, anticipation is created, and readers will want to turn the page to see what happens next.
Another trick is to read the story aloud. I tape myself reading and listen to others reading the story to catch things I wouldn't have otherwise. Does it sound as I intended? Does it generate emotional reactions? If the answers are yes, it's a win!
ME: Would you like to share an example of a before and after where you needed to show more and found the right words to paint the image for the reader?
In OBI'S MUD BATH, I altered my wording to paint a more vivid picture for the reader.
"Could that be mud?"
Without warning a snake uncurled, slithering up to Obi.
"Could that be a puddle of mud?"
But mud didn't slither and hiss.
In the first line, adding the word "puddle" made the image more specific in the reader's mind's eye. In the second line, I stopped "telling" and instead "showed" that it was a snake.
ME: You make such good points about the revising process, especially reading our manuscripts aloud. Writing is about balance. How do you know you've got it just right? What tips or suggestions do you have for writers in terms of striving for that balance of showing versus telling?
Great question! I create a physical dummy after a few rounds of editing my work. This gives me a visual perspective. I see if the problem is stated upfront and if the who-what-when-where-why are all addressed. I get a sense of the flow and pacing of the story. Is there too much copy, dialogue, or detail on certain pages? Does the narrative arc land properly? Does the ending add a twist, and is it satisfying?
I will then edit again and submit it to my critique group. These are 'my people' who know their craft and provide honest feedback. I always find their input helpful. I've learned that if everyone is pointing out something similar, there is a reason.
Then, I put the story away. I do not rush to submit. Looking at it with a "fresh eye" is extremely valuable and telling. Rereading after a period of time, I find things jump out at me. Final edits are made. At this stage, I listen to my inner voice and start to submit!
ME: Thank you, you have given us so many tools and examples to help us with our writing!
Annette Schottenfeld's debut picture book, Not So Fast, Max: A Rosh Hashanah Visit With Grandma (Kalaniot Books), illustrated by Jennifer Kirkham, releases March 2021.Her second picture book, Obi's Mud Bath (Spork – Clear Fork Publishing), illustrated by Folasade Adeshida, releases in the summer of 2021.
Learn more about Annette:
Photo by Andrew Werner
Tagged #kidlit, #picturebooks, @annettebernsteinschottenfeld, @authoryvonafast, @candicemarleyconner, @gabriellecopelandschoeffield, @kathyderrick, @sandrasutter7 Comments
Showing Through Heart, Sensory Details, and Wordplay: Featuring Gabi Snyder
October 17, 2020 tina shepardson
When writing for a variety of ages, showing looks different. For younger audiences, often simple language is used while for older audiences more detailed language is selected. The reader's experience is shaped depending on the topic. Sit back and enjoy this marvelous interview with the very talented and experienced Gabi Snyder who has two beautiful picture books that do just this! Talk about Best In Show! Tails are wagging everywhere over her debut picture book:
TS: We are so thrilled to have you with us today. I really enjoyed your virtual launch with Robin Rosenthal. Your audience had a terrific snapshot into what you both contributed in creating TWO DOGS ON A TRIKE. The story is so clever and the wording so precise. Whether drafting or revising, how do you know when it is necessary to show action, scene, and sensory elements?
GS: Great question! I think the answer depends in large part on what type of story you're writing and who your intended reader is. When writing picture books for the very young, you may want to keep your text super simple and rely on the illustrations to convey most of the action and imagery. For example, the text in my debut picture book TWO DOGS ON A TRIKE, illustrated by Robin Rosenthal and recently out from Abrams Appleseed, is very simple. The first two spreads read:
One dog stands alone.
Two dogs on a trike.
As we move through the story, a new dog is added with each new form of transportation. A sneaky cat follows the dogs, but the cat is not mentioned in the text. So when reading the story with a child, the child might notice something (the cat following) that the adult (the reader), seems unaware of. That can add a fun twist to reading!
If I'm writing for an older picture book audience, I might add more imagery and strong active verbs, but it will depend on the story I'm trying to tell. In my second picture book, LISTEN (illustrated by Stephanie Graegin and out in spring 2021 from S&S/Wiseman), the focus is on listening and mindfulness. The story begins with the noise of a busy morning and draws the reader closer as it encourages listening to quieter and quieter sounds. So when drafting and revising LISTEN, choosing the perfect sensory details was vital. At the start of the story, I use sound words like "BEEP! WOOF! ERNT-ERNT! VROOM!" to convey the overwhelming noise the child faces when she steps out into the world. In contrast, later in the story, as we move to quieter sounds, I include the more lyrical lines, "brush-rush-hush/Wind through trees/Listen."
TS: You raise so many great points. And these examples are priceless. As writers, we have to be so present as to what benefits the topic and reader most. Are there specific strategies, tools, or resources you use to incorporate more showing/descriptive language?
GS: One strategy I like to use is thinking about how the story can appeal to every sense. Often, with a picture book, the illustrations convey many if not all of the visual details. So, unless it's central to the plot, I'll probably leave out visual details like the color of shirt a character is wearing. Instead, I'll focus my text on appealing to other senses. I'll consider whether I might incorporate sound words, especially onomatopoeia. And I'll ask, can I add smells, tastes, and sensations? All of those sensory details paint a more vivid picture for the reader and bring them closer to the action.
TS: You are right! I share this thought process with my students regularly. Would you like to share an example of a before and after where you needed to show more and found the right words to paint the image for the reader?
GS: Here are a few spreads from the first draft of LISTEN:
…to learn.
…to understand.
…to feel.
Listen for new words, new sounds, new songs.
I revised to add more specific, vivid imagery. Here's how those lines read in the final version:
Listen past the crunch of gravel and the scrape of chalk.
Can you hear new words? Listen to each sound.
Some pop, like quick and snappy, while others stretch, like
looong and leisurely.
Listen.
TS: Wow! The language following your revision is gorgeous. The sensory details take the reader on such a great experience! And this is no easy feat! It takes time to revise even just one section. I can't wait to read LISTEN!!! Writing is about balance. How do you know you've got it just right? What tips or suggestions do you have for writers in terms of striving for that balance of showing versus telling?
GS: I recently attended the SCBWI Summer Spectacular (virtual conference), and listening to all the amazing panels, I was struck by how many creatives mentioned the importance of finding the "heart" or "essential truth" in your manuscript. I also noted that a few creatives mentioned the importance of putting yourself back into your child mind and remembering what's real and true for a child. I think the balance of show versus tell will often be easier to find if you've first zoned in on the heart of your story, a heart that is real and true for a child. Further, if you're writing a picture book, the text should feel incomplete without the illustrations. In other words, you should leave much of the showing to the illustrator. The illustrator is your co-creator and gets to tell at least half of the story!
I also find that reading my story aloud helps me get the rhythm and pacing right. It can be even more helpful to have someone else read the story aloud to you so you can hear where they stumble over your words or phrasing. Even having your computer read aloud can help! As you 'relisten to the complete text, think about the continuity of your imagery and language. If, for example, your manuscript is a humorous story about dogs, maybe you've included some silly dog-related puns. If so, you might consider whether there's a way to push the dog wordplay even further.
And, of course, it can be extremely helpful to gain feedback from trusted critique partners. Finally, if you're stuck or uncertain about any aspect of your manuscript, put it away for a week – or even a month. Coming back to your manuscript after time away will allow you to approach it with a fresh perspective. Happy revising!
Gabi's Bio:
Gabi's debut picture book, TWO DOGS ON A TRIKE, illustrated by Robin Rosenthal, released May 19, 2020 from Abrams Appleseed. Her second picture book, LISTEN, illustrated by Stephanie Graegin, is due in spring 2021 from Simon & Schuster/Wiseman.
Gabi studied psychology at the University of Washington and creative writing at The University of Texas and is a member of SCBWI. When she's not writing, she loves taking nature walks, visiting Little Free Libraries, and baking sweet treats. She lives in Oregon with her family. Learn more at gabisnyder.com.
Learn more about Gabi and her latest books at:
Website: gabisnyder.com
Twitter: https://twitter.com/Gabi_A_Snyder
IG: https://www.instagram.com/gabi_snyder_writer/
Tagged @sandrasutter1 Comment
How Illustrations "Show" the Story: featuring Terry Sirrell
Happy Fall Everyone! I hope the new season finds everyone safe and healthy. As authors, we spend precious time searching for the right words to show our characters and their emotions. What does this journey of storytelling look like for an illustrator? I never fully understood until I had the honor of observing the illustration process as the talented Terry Sirrell brought WALKOUT to life. From the early stages, I marveled at every step, the time required, and the unwavering talent Terry displayed on every page. His years of experience bring a deep and rich perspective to showing a story through art!
*I added my middle initial since we have the same initials!
TMS: Terry, it's such an honor to have you here today! WALKOUT is a beautiful book. Your dedication, talent, and expertise have brought Maddie and Stella's story to life in a way readers will never forget!
Whether drafting or revising, what are the initial steps you take in creating characters and scenes from a manuscript?
TS: After reading the manuscript, I first start creating the characters with a lot of very loose thumbnail sketches to get a feel for what they will look like. When I like the way the characters are looking, I'll then do a larger, tighter sketch to show the art director. Once approved, I'll start working on the scenes of the book with loose thumbnail sketches. This is when I break down the manuscript to separate spreads throughout the book to match the story with the pictures.
Early Thumbnail Sketches
Character Head Studies
Manuscript in Separate Spreads
Early Scene Development
TMS: Watching these steps unfold was so exciting! Meeting Maddie and Stella for the first time was such a special moment. I loved opening your emails with the newest developments! These steps alone show your impeccable attention to the planning and details involved. Are there specific strategies, tools, or resources you use? Do you have any favorites?
TS: I have a specific style to my illustration work, but my strategy is to tweak my style a bit to match a story depending on if it's a more serious story or if it's a funny story.The tools I used to use were pencils, pens, ink, Dr. Martin Dyes, and watercolor paper. These days I'm strictly digital. I work on a 22″ Wacom Cintiq attached to my iMac computer. I love it! A Cintiq is a digital drawing board. Instead of drawing on paper, you draw on a glass monitor.
My resources are on the internet. I'll do a Google search if I need to see what something looks like, I used to go to the library for picture references. Plus, you can learn so much on the internet. I've been illustrating for many years, but I haven't illustrated a children's picture book since I started working on the computer. So I thought I would take an online course to brush up on my book illustration skills and to explore to see if there was anything different I needed to do to get work again in this market. My friend told me about an online course he was taking named the Children's Book Academy, owned by Dr. Mira Reisberg.
So I signed up and took her children's book illustration course. Mira was great, I really learned a lot of new stuff and was reminded of some things that I already knew. I really liked that she encouraged me to use textures in my work. Thanks, Mira!Here's a link to Mira's website in case you're interested in learning more about writing or illustrating a children's book. I give it an A+!
The Children's Book Academy
The Children's Book Academy: The best places for children's book writing and illustrating courses for complete beginners to award-winners.
TMS: I agree Terry! Mira's classes offer so much to students at every stage of their journey. I love her classes too! How do you decide to make changes or maintain what you have created? Are other professionals involved like an editor and/or publisher?
TS: Working on a computer makes it a lot easier for changes compared to working traditionally using paper and paint. I'm pretty good about making changes if the art director, editor, or publisher wants them. I trust their eye and the art usually turns out better.
TMS: Would you like to share an example of a before and after of a character or scene for the reader?
TS: Sure, here's a before and after example.
TMS: This is so interesting to see how the features of characters change throughout the process. How do you know you've got it just right? What tips or suggestions do you have for illustrators in terms of striving for that balance in creating images that best portray the story?
TS: For me, it's a gut feeling, I just know what I'm looking for in my work. Of course, the art director, editor, and publisher will let you know also. Read the story a few times so you get to know the characters and where the story takes place. My tip for illustrators, new and the seasoned pro would be to keep drawing and keep learning wherever you can.
Mastering the Right Shades
TMS: Yes, because you never know where it will take you! In this case, Maddie and Stella's story! What a pleasure to have watched you take this project from start to finish! I learned so much about illustrating! Thank you for sharing your process with us, Terry!
Terry's Bio:
Cartoonist and illustrator Terry Sirrell has been in the creative business for many years. His first job out of art school was an assistant art director at the Field Newspaper Syndicate where he put together sales kits to promote all of the cartoon strips to newspapers around the world. Later, he became an art director in advertising, then moved on to his illustration career. You may have seen his work on the back of Cap`n Crunch and Kellogg's Corn Flakes cereal boxes. His cartoons and characters also have appeared in the advertising of numerous major corporations and in dozens of publications including Reader's Digest, Newsweek, Highlights Magazine, Clubhouse Magazine, Boys' Life, Girls' Life, Woman's Day, National Geographic Kids, Family Fun/Disney, The New York Daily News, and The Chicago Tribune. Terry also illustrates children's books and cartoon maps. The most recent book he illustrated is WALKOUT, which can be purchased in book stores, on Amazon, and other online bookstore websites.
Learn more about Terry and his amazing illustrations at:
Website: http://www.tsirrell.com
Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/TerrySirrellBooks
Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/tsirrell/
Twitter: https://twitter.com/TSirrell
Writing Is Mining- featuring Beth Anderson
July 18, 2020 July 16, 2020 tina shepardson
I hope this blog post finds you all having a great summer in our new normal. Today I am thrilled to have Beth Anderson as our featured guest. As you know, she is an accomplished writer focusing on narrative nonfiction and historical fiction picture books. Her quote "Writing is Mining" holds such truth. She describes writing in these genres as digging for those special memories, emotions, and meaning. Beth has wonderful strategies for showing in these areas.
TS: Beth, thank you so much for being our guest today and congratulations on your October release of "Smelly" Kelly and His Super Senses: How James Kelly's Nose Saved the New York City Subway. Whether drafting or revising, how do you know when it is necessary to show action, scene and sensory elements?
BA: Thank you so much for inviting me to share some thoughts on the essential "show vs. tell."
I believe in action wherever it makes sense – the more the better. Keeping the characters active keeps the reader turning pages. Actions reveal character so it's a huge part of the emotional arc. But there also has to be the flow in and out, along with weaving in needed context. Constant action for the sake of action is exhausting!
Scenes carry the emotional arc of the main character as well as the plot. They move the story forward, stepping-stones in the character's transformation that build to the story's end. If a scene doesn't serve that purpose, then it needs to go or be revised to carry a piece of the emotional arc. Sometimes, even "internal" scenes can be active. Here's an example from Lizzie Demands a Seat with the additional challenge of required context:
She eyed empty seats. Despite being born a "free black" in a "free state," she'd never been treated as equal. She'd been rejected, restricted, and refused by schools, restaurants, and theaters. Suddenly late-for-church wasn't as important as late-for-equality. Lizzie stood firm.
Passengers murmured.
Horses snorted.
Pedestrians gathered.
Finally, the driver held up the reins. "We need to go."
Scenes play out best with action, and if you can use action to transition between scenes, do that, too. "Smelly" Kelly and His Super Senses, releasing Oct. 13, was a huge challenge regarding transitions between scenes. There was so little information on James Kelly's days in the NYC subway, all I had were anecdotes with the potential to be priceless scenes. I had to find a way to organize them with a special "heart" thread and effectively transition between scenes to avoid an "episodic" feel. Here's an example of an active transition that lets us pause with the character and progress to the next scene:
"Exhausted, he paused and peered through the crowd gathered at the movie poster. Even superheroes needed help."
And here's an example from An Inconvenient Alphabet where I used imagery to actively transition. Instead of saying that Noah Webster wanted to reform American English spelling, it became:
"Armed with the twenty-six letters of the English alphabet everyone knew and loved, Noah launched a spelling revolution—ready to turn "rong" spelling into "rite.""
Sensory elements enrich the reading experience by inviting readers into the moment, immersing them in the setting, and connecting readers to characters on multiple levels. As you will see in "Smelly" Kelly's story, I use sensory elements liberally!
TS: Are there specific strategies, tools or resources you use to incorporate more showing/descriptive language?
I use the online thesaurus a lot. If you can find just the right word, it can make an illustration note or other words unnecessary. For instance, recently I replaced "took" with "claimed." It made a huge difference—adding attitude.
I can't resist onomatopoeia. But besides sounds, I also ask myself – What would that look like? In "Smelly" Kelly, there are lots of stinks. Instead of trying to describe the stink in the New Yorker Hotel, it was more fun to show the reaction to the smell.
"Maids pinched their noses. Guests fled. Engineers analyzed and pondered, but they couldn't figure out where the leak was coming from."
I also try to "show" emotions, especially what cannot be shown easily by an illustrator. When Kelly realizes he's not doing enough, I tried to show that feeling of inadequacy:
A broken steam line blasted water pipes.
Kelly shook his head. Someone could've been burned. Sniffing wasn't enough. He needed to listen, to hear sounds no one else heard.
There's some physical movement there, but mostly I take you inside Kelly's head. And that's another powerful way to achieve more showing. Many writers call it psychic distance. Once I learned about it, my writing changed and became more immediate. The example above doesn't say "he thought" or "he scolded himself" or "he realized." Cutting the "head verbs" eliminates that filter between the reader and the character. It's like the difference between indirect speech (He told me to stop.) and direct speech (STOP!). If you go straight to the words or realization or thought, the reader feels it as the character, and it eliminates the "telling."
TS: Would you like to share an example of a before and after where you needed to show more and found the right words to paint the image for the reader?
BA: Sure! I looked back at an early version of "Smelly" Kelly and His Super Senses. Here's one line that was very "telling":
"He settled into an apartment and took a job with the subway."
Because that involved an action (took a job in the subway) that set off the whole story, I needed to show motivation and the emotion behind that decision. It evolved into a scene with "showing" and delightful illustrations:
James set out to find a job, but, as always, his incredible nose proved troublesome.
Fish market—no!
Sanitation—no!
Meat packing—NO!
He felt a rumble below the sidewalk and peered through the grate. The damp air bristled with mystery.
TS: Writing is about balance. How do you know you've got it just right? What tips or suggestions do you have for writers in terms of striving for that balance of showing versus telling?
BA: Generally, I think showing appears in scenes and telling in transitions. Emotion and important action pieces require showing. That's what keeps your story alive, where you want the reader to connect. Telling can speed up the narrative to get to the good stuff, but too much can bog it down. Showing and telling are intertwined with pacing, characterization, and point of view. It's truly a complicated dance. When I researched to prepare a presentation on point of view and really examined how it works in a picture book, I found that the "camera" goes in and out—and that in and out is achieved with showing and telling, and also involves "proximity." Just another reason to read and analyze LOTS of books!
TS: Wow, Beth! You have given so much to think about. Your knowledge and command over the elements are so strong and comes through your writing vividly. Thank you!
Beth Anderson, author of Lizzie Demands a Seat, An Inconvenient Alphabet, and "Smelly" Kelly and His Super Senses, is drawn to stories that open minds, touch hearts, and inspire questions. A former educator who has always marveled at the power of books, she hopes that voices from the past will help children discover their own. Beth has more historical gems on the way!
Learn more about Beth and her amazing books at:
Website: bethandersonwriter.com
Pinterest, Twitter, Instagram: @Bandersonwriter
Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/beth.anderson.33671748
signed copies of books available from Old Firehouse Books
Tagged Candice Marley Conner, Gabrielle Schoeffield, Katharine Derrick, Picture books, Sandra Sutter, Tina Shepardson, Wonder of Words, Yvona Fast8 Comments


text:
Sports-no-CBCCBC-Sports
CBC Sports
Jets' scoring erupts in bounce-back win over Blues
NHL·GAME 3
Kyle Connor scored twice, Patrik Laine had a goal and an assist, and the Winnipeg Jets beat the St. Louis Blues 6-3 on Sunday night to climb back into their first-round playoff series.
Winnipeg finally solves Jordan Binnington in 6-goal effort
Steve Overbey · The Associated Press · Posted: Apr 14, 2019 10:38 PM ET | Last Updated: April 15
Winnipeg's Dustin Byfuglien celebrates after his third-period goal during the Jets' 6-3 win against the St. Louis Blues in Game 3 of their first-round series on Sunday. (Jeff Roberson/The Associated Press)
Kyle Connor and the Winnipeg Jets got back on track by sticking to the same way they wanted to play all along.
Connor scored twice, Patrik Laine had a goal and an assist, and the Jets beat the St. Louis Blues 6-3 on Sunday night to climb back into their first-round playoff series.
BOXSCORE: Jets 6, Blues 3
Sunday's results
Winnipeg dropped the first two games at home. But they were one-goal games, and Connor felt the Jets just needed a few minor tweaks.
Looked pretty good in St. Louis.
"As a whole, we played the right way for [the first] two games," Connor said. "Tonight, it was nice to have everyone contribute."
WATCH | Jets finally solve Blues' Binnington for Game 3 victory:
The Winnipeg Jets doubled up the St. Louis Blues 6-3 and now trail their best-of-seven series 2-1. 1:19
Kevin Hayes, Brandon Tanev and Dustin Byfuglien also scored for Winnipeg, and Connor Hellebuyck made 26 saves.
Game 4 of the best-of-seven series is Tuesday night in St. Louis.
"We're building every shift, every game throughout the series," Connor said. "We're getting close to our game and it's pretty dangerous."
Quick strikes
David Perron, Vladimir Tarasenko and Alexander Steen scored for the Blues, and Jordan Binnington made 23 stops.
Perron put St. Louis in front with a power-play goal late in the first period. He whipped a shot past Hellebuyck from the slot.
But the Jets grabbed the lead for good when they scored three times in a span of 4:01 in the second.
Jordan Binnington: From almost an afterthought to 'the guy' in Blues' net
Hayes started the blitz with a shot from the point that went through traffic before slipping past Binnington. Laine then scored his third goal of the series, converting a pass from Jacob Trouba.
Connor capped the blitz with a power-play wrist shot from the faceoff dot at 8:58. He added an insurance goal 14:44 into the final period.
"It was just a matter of time," Hayes said. "It's a start."
Jets have answers
St. Louis had a chance in the third, pulling within one when Tarasenko scored a power-play goal just 1:51 into the period. But Tanev and Byfuglien responded for Winnipeg, running its lead back out to 5-2 with 11:54 left.
"Tonight was not really our team, obviously," Perron said "We weren't happy with our effort. We didn't play a good game. But we've got to give them credit."
Laine, who had 30 goals and 20 assists in the regular season, has scored in all three playoff games. He had just one goal in his last 19 regular-season games.
Stanley Cup playoffs schedule and TV info
Laine scored five goals in an 8-4 win in St. Louis on Nov. 24, 2018.
"We just stayed within our game and tried to play it simple," Laine said. "We got going and just tried to keep our foot on the gas the whole 60 [minutes]."
Hellebuyck made a big stop on Pat Maroon just seconds before Tanev's goal.
Binnington made a trio of saves in the opening 5:45 to keep the game scoreless. He denied Bryan Little, Hayes, and Mathieu Perrault. Binnington stopped 50 of 54 shots over the first two games.
"The biggest thing is we didn't play our game tonight," Tarasenko said. "It was not our best game out there. It's on us, and we'll handle it tomorrow."
CBC's Journalistic Standards and Practices|About CBC Sports
Blues head home with 2-0 series lead over Jets
Stanley Cup playoffs: Western Conference preview
In the first round of the playoffs, Winnipeg needs to get rid of the Blues
TEAM PAGE: St. Louis Blues
TEAM PAGE: Winnipeg Jets

redpajama_set_name: RedPajamaCommonCrawl


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/ Quick History / 5 Titanic Coincidences that Prove Reality is Stranger than Fiction
5 Titanic Coincidences that Prove Reality is Stranger than Fiction
Christina Boyes on May 27, 2015 - 3:15 pm in Quick History
You've heard about the wreck of the Titanic, but there's more to this ship's story than popular history wants to tell you. We've dug up the information on some interesting and strange coincidences that surround this ship. Call them mysteries if you will, they gave us the chills. We already visited the ultimate Titanic museum, Titanic Belfast, on the Belfast episode, but these Titanic coincidences surprised us… read on for more!
1. The Titan and the Titanic
Imagine a huge ship – the largest of its day – crossing the ocean between the United States and the United Kingdom, striking an iceberg, and sinking. We're not talking about the RMS Titanic, although the story is eerily similar. Fourteen years before the Titanic hit the water, Morgan Robertson wrote a compelling sea yarn about the Titan. This fictitious ship shares scarily similar specs with the Titanic, and faced the same fate as the now famous and ill-fated seafaring giant. Some passages come frighteningly close to describing the Titanic:
From the bridge, engine-room, and a dozen places on her deck the ninety-two doors of nineteen water-tight compartments could be closed in half a minute by turning a lever. These doors would also close automatically in the presence of water. With nine compartments flooded the ship would still float, and as no known accident of the sea could possibly fill this many, the steamship Titan was considered practically unsinkable.
But Robertson's descriptions of the wreck itself were even more disturbing. You can read the full text on the Project Gutenberg Library online.
A photo of the iceberg that most likely hit the Titanic.
Robertson claimed that the story had been "given" to him in a psychic vision. His book, Futility (retitled The Wreck of the Titan), went out of print before the Titanic was made, but was re-released shortly after the tragedy, with a few minor details altered (some say, to reduce the similarities). Robertson's tale condemned humanity's hubris in creating an "unsinkable" ship. His work of fiction was adapted to film and stage, but fame couldn't save Robertson, who died of an overdose of a once commonly-prescribed medicine. His warning to humankind went unheeded, and his life ended just three years after the Titanic sank.
2. William T. Stead and the Titanic
A prominent newspaper man in the United Kingdom, and often considered the father of the modern tabloid, William T. Stead died aboard the Titanic. Although little is known about his final hours, he was generally recognized as a good guy with a soft spot for the psychic and spiritual. That wasn't too uncommon in his day, though – Spiritualism was a fad, and plenty of Europeans and Americans spent time and money on séances, psychic visits, and the like.
Two articles he wrote are considered by a few folks to be psychic. I don't know about the whole concept of premonitions, but I will say this – he got a few details scarily correct. It's one titanic coincidence I won't soon forget!
A 1912 illustration of the Titanic's sinking entitled "The Sad Parting."
On March 22, 1886, Stead published an article about a ship that sank when it collided with another ship, killing most of the people on board. The reason for the deaths wasn't the collision, though – there were too few lifeboats on board. He wrote the fictional account as a warning of potential consequences if ships went to sea with too few lifeboats.
Later, in 1892, he published an article about the rescue of passengers whose boat sank when it collided with an iceberg. Taken separately, the two stories don't really seem that creepy. Combine them, and it makes you wonder a bit about Mr. Stead, and the times he lived in.
This photo shows the Titanic's lifeboat number 6, loaded with survivors.
3. The Titanic and the Poseidon Adventure
When the Titanic sailed, motion pictures were just getting started. They weren't popular among the wealthy, who viewed them as a passing fad. But the Titanic was showing a few…and on the night it sank, the feature was The Poseidon Adventure. Curious what it was about? If you guessed a sinking ocean liner and a group of passengers that struggled to survive, you were right. The film was so popular that it was screened twice that night.
Timing was everything – in a titanic coincidence, the first showing began at 11PM, just before the Titanic struck the iceberg that sank it. The second showing began after the ship started sinking, and many passengers likely stayed in their seats until the film concluded at 1AM – too late to be saved.
4. The Titanian and the Titanic
In 1935, sailor William Reeves was aboard a ship named the Titanian that was crossing the Atlantic. Reeves, according to legend, had a bad feeling about the voyage and sounded the alarm to prevent the ship from hitting an iceberg before ice was seen. Sure enough, Reeves was right – the ship was in an ice field and required the assistance of an icebreaker in order to reach London safely.
It appears that Reeves embellished his own story of the events in a few articles written after the fact, claiming that the ship was at the same geographic location as the Titan from Morgan Robertson's book. In reality, they were very far from that site. What is true, however, is that Reeves was born on either April 14th or 15th (sources disagree), 1912 – either the day that the Titanic had its fatal collision or the day it sank. Now that is an odd coincidence…
Strangely enough, also in 1935, the British passenger ship Titan collided with the German ship Uruguay's floating dock in Hamburg on the 15th of November.
5. The Moon, the Sun, and the Sinking of the Titanic: Coincidences discovered only recently…
There were a few crazy coincidences in the sky before the Titanic hit the infamous iceberg. And they had nothing to do with psychics or spiritualists. Science actually has a pretty compelling explanation…
You don't just wind up with icebergs blocking a common shipping lane. A natural phenomenon was at work. The moon was closer to the Earth than it had been in 1,400 years, and the Earth was also closer to the sun. Combined with a spring tide, these events dislodged several icebergs and set them afloat in the Titanic's way.
No matter what caused the fatal accident, the number of strange coincidences speak more about the mindset of the time when the Titanic sunk than they do about the wreck itself. People were worried about the low number of lifeboats on passenger ships of the day, and with good reason. Engineering pushed the limits of possibility, but the space and weight saved by reducing the number of lifeboats also cost hundreds of lives.
The Titanic's Maiden Voyage. Image by Prioryman.
Even the name of the ships involved says quite a bit – the Titans, for whom the ships were named, were the second generation of Greek deities, and although they overthrew their parents, they were also overthrown shortly afterwards. The reign of Titans, both ships and gods, was short-lived.
1. http://io9.com/5900083/the-novella-that-predicted-the-wreck-of-the-titanic
2. http://www.gutenberg.org/files/24880/24880-h/24880-h.htm
3. http://newsfeed.time.com/2012/04/14/author-predicts-titanic-sinking-14-years-earlier/
4. https://www.denverlibrary.org/blog/titanic-mystery-prophecy-tragedy
5. http://www.snopes.com/lost/poseidon.asp
6. http://www.mirror.co.uk/news/weird-news/was-titanics-fate-written-in-the-stars-scientists-753172
7. http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/William_Thomas_Stead
8. http://www.encyclopedia-titanica.org/forums/individual-members-threads/16488-stuart-g-reeves.html
9. http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/How_the_Mail_Steamer_Went_Down_in_Mid_Atlantic_by_a_Survivor
10. http://www.attackingthedevil.co.uk/reviews/oldworld.php
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Christina Boyes
I'm a fan of honest words, clarity, and impact. A writer, editor, and translator, I spend my days guzzling coffee like a champ, living the expat dream, and being mom to world's sweetest preschooler. I'm co-owner and copywriting head at Rusmexus Writers, a history buff, and have a background in international relations.
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Adapted from a short story, "The Princess Without Pots" asks a lot of its audience.
Mostly, it asks a lot of the adults in its audience.
Writer and director Maria Burnham–who penned the original short story in Spanish and then translated the script to English–says she added liner notes to future casting directors to put anyone in any role he or she is qualified for.
Which is why the production opening June 9 has a female playing the role of a male. It would be the same if the title character, Cristina, were handing out roles to her pals on the playground.
"When kids play, when they reenact shows that they watch on TV or movies, they don't think about gender involved in the character that they love, and I think that's something along the way that we lose as adults," Burnham says. "It's nice to remind the parents that this is fine, there's nothing wrong with being whoever you want to be."
The story tells the tale of Cristina, who prefers to be called Sweet Pea. The princess must find a suitor, but to win her heart, a prince must win a battle against Pea herself.
The production kicks off Ghostlight Ensemble's new Nightlight Children's Series. The company recently finished a run of Oscar Wilde's "An Ideal Husband," so this is a step to a little lighter fare for the cast and crew.
"The actors having fun telling these stories is part of what is so entertaining to watch," Burnham says.
The set will be made to mimic the imagination of a child reenacting or telling a story, she says. Painted and stacked cardboard boxes will build Sweet Pea's castle and primary colors will attract young audiences.
The moral of Sweet Pea's story is similar to the script in the casting notes, Burnham says: "It's OK to use your imagination to be anything you want to be."


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Honest promoters to have greater leeway: Under scheme in works, such promoters to get chance to make first bid – The Financial Express
4 Jan 2021 Anil R Tikotekar IBC Leave a comment
Clipped from: https://www.financialexpress.com/economy/honest-promoters-to-have-greater-leeway-under-scheme-in-works-such-promoters-to-get-chance-to-make-first-bid/2162058/
Under the scheme, meant only for NPAs less than a year old, the eligible promoters will get to submit resolution plans first.
While promoters who are wilful defaulters are expressly banned from bidding for firms under the insolvency process, the so-called 'pre-pack' scheme being ushered in, with a view to enabling early detection of stress and quick resolution, will provide a special facility for promoters with no history of defaulting wilfully.
Under the scheme, meant only for NPAs less than a year old, the eligible promoters will get to submit resolution plans first. Once the promoter's bid is received, other suitors can also make their offers under the Swiss challenge method. The idea is to facilitate transparent and market-driven offers for the stressed assets.
The move is important as bankers are wary of taking decisions on haircut on their own for fears of possible investigations later. Also, the scheme will likely fast-track the resolution of a stressed company before its value erodes substantially.
The "pre-pack" scheme will only be for the resolution of toxic assets, and not for liquidation. So, if resolution efforts fail, creditors can wrap up the process and are free to initiate proceedings under the existing Insolvency and Bankruptcy Code (IBC). To cut delay and cost, the scheme may also have a much shorter time limit for resolution — less than a half of the maximum of nine months prescribed under the IBC.
The scheme will require amendments to the IBC, and the government may introduce a Bill to this effect as early as the Budget session of Parliament. If adopted early, it will be a key tool at creditors' disposal once the government lifts a suspension of the IBC process against Covid-related defaults from March 25, 2021, which may lead to a sudden rise in insolvency cases.
As reported by FE earlier, the 'pre-pack' scheme will be a pre-IBC window for resolution of toxic assets, which will only complement the existing framework but not substitute it.
"Even under the current IBC framework, promoters (who are not wilful defaulters) are allowed to bid for their companies if the NPA is less than one-year old. So, pre-pack isn't diluting the essence of the Section 29-A of the IBC (which deals with the disqualification criteria) with regard to promoters," an industry source said. As such, promoters of stressed MSMEs, barring the wilful defaulters, are already allowed under the IBC to bid, irrespective of the period of the NPAs.
Importantly, unlike the usual IBC process, the management of the stressed firm will continue to run it unless the company finally changes hand. The resolution professional, in this case, will have a limited role. He will just oversee the entire resolution process but not run the company.
To initiate the pre-pack process, the approval of more than a half of creditors as well as shareholders of the debtors will be required. The lenders and the debtors can then approach the National Company Law Tribunal (NCLT) for permission to start the process. However, the final resolution plan needs to be approved by at least 66% of creditors, in sync with the IBC requirement. This will then be placed before the NCLT for clearance and subsequent implementation.
Earlier, the government had set up a committee under Insolvency and Bankruptcy Board of India (IBBI) chairman MS Sahoo to submit a report on 'pre-pack' insolvency. The planned amendments are expected to be based on the Sahoo panel report, which was submitted about two months ago.
Manoj Kumar, head (M&A, transactions and insolvency) at consultancy firm Corporate Professionals Capital, said: "As there is an expectation of increasing the number of insolvency cases as the suspension on new cases would be lifted in March 2021, it would be a good idea to bring pre-pack insolvency provisions beforehand. Pre-packaged resolutions process might help to resolve early stage bankruptcy situations of many viable businesses and would reduce the burden of insolvency resolution system."
Sudhir Chandi, director at Resurgent India, said: "The distinguishing feature of a pre-pack insolvency resolution is that it is a speedy procedure which addresses the stress of the entity and provides for a restructuring plan in a cost-effective manner without resorting to the initiation of insolvency proceedings."
Data available with the IBBI show, of the 1,942 ongoing cases as of September 2020, the resolution of as many as 1,442 has been dragging on beyond the mandatory 270 days. In many cases, analysts have attributed this delay to the legal hurdles posed primarily by defaulting promoters' dogged pursuit to hold on to their companies. As many as 1, 025 firms have gone for liquidation.
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