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Mason City Schools » Departments » Communication & Connection » News » MCS Launches "Your Story Matters" Podcast
Our stories weave our community together.
Sharing the real and vulnerable parts of our lives with each other is life-changing. We live in an "insta" world of perfect images and superficial relationships. When one person has the courage to say something authentic - it inspires us. It encourages empathy. It offers hope. That's why this year, Mason City Schools launched a weekly podcast "Your Story Matters" that gives listeners the ability to connect with members of our school community in new ways. (Search for it on iTunes, Google Play, Spotify or Anchor.)
"Your Story Matters brings Mason's rich culture to life through story. You'll hear stories from staff, students, and community members designed to celebrate diversity, passion, and purpose," explains Tracey Carson, Public Information Officer. "We've been so moved by what happens when we go a little deeper and learn about the parts of ourselves that we don't always put on display."
Check out the podcast!
- MHS student Kaya Rossey - "I was diagnosed with depression and anxiety and it's so important for me to be [the help] for someone else because so many people have been there for me."
- MCS bus driver Bob Cross - "You guys are burying our Father who I never knew, and we're talking for the first time. And, [my brother] said it's a kind of cyclical - everything happens for a reason."
- Deputy Superintendent Amy Brennan - "Having a mom who was a Chinese-American immigrant certainly gave me a level of empathy when you're asked as a kid many times - 'What are you?"
- Learning Experience Supervisor Krissy Hufnagel - "I am a single parent and that has been incredibly challenging at times, and incredibly rewarding at times."
- Learning Experience Supervisor Shanna Bumiller - "I had a younger brother who was very, very troubled. He didn't play school well."
- MCS Bus Driver Rebecca Bate - "I was that child with ADD. I wasn't supposed to be able to sit still."
- Former Mason City Councilman Jim Fox - "It's always been a great place to grow up and raise kids, but it's just become the best."
-MHS student Hannah Humes - "I don't need easy or optional - just opportunity!"
- MHS student Mariah Norman - "I really learned the importance of losing that day. There are always going to be people smarter than you, taller, prettier. It taught me to run my own race."
- MMS student Rishika Jeyaprakash - "It's OK to judge a book by it's cover. Just don't judge a human by their cover."
- MI student Owen Smith - "Dads can help, too!"
- MMS teacher Katie Lin - "Does he understand that mommy and daddy don't really look alike?"
-MI teacher Litty Mathai - "That's your name, that's important, that's your identity, and that matters."
-ME teacher Kristen Lazuta - "You know, none of this is meant to be perfect."
-MECC teacher Soroya Smith - "I made up in my mind having moments like that, I wanted my students (and really anybody that I encounter) to feel big, to feel seen, feel important."
-Superintendent Jonathan Cooper - "There are difficulties and crucibles along the way, but those are the moments that really shape you."
- MECC Principal Melissa Bly - "School was always a safe place for me."
- ME Principal Javaris Powell - "Your kind won't do well in a 4-year university."
-MI Principal Eric Messer - "You can never be afraid to embarrass yourself!"
-MMS Principal Lauren Gentene - "Do I need to be HERE doing this?"
- MHS Principal Bobby Dodd - "Let's not just talk about things, let's make it happen."
Which stories need told?
Email contactmason@masonohioschools.com and tell us whose story you'd love to hear.


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Suits you Sir! Sport chief seduced by Auntie's advances
Daily Sport and Sunday Sport editor-in-chief Tony Livesey stepped down on Tuesday after 18 years at Britain's most controversial paper.
Livesey is leaving Manchester-based Sport Newspapers to concentrate on his broadcasting career at the BBC.
In addition to his role as editor-inchief and managing director at Sport Newspapers, Livesey presents the breakfast show on BBC Radio Lancashire and has just finished working on a five-programme series for Channel 4.
He will cover sport for North West Tonight, the region's flagship evening TV news programme, and is also hoping to work on other TV projects at the BBC.
Livesey said one of his lasting legacies would be the Cutting Edge Channel 4 documentary about the Sport, which showed him coming up with the infamous headline "Shoots You, Sir" about the murder of Gianni Versace.
Livesey said: "One of my other proudest moments was when I didn't quite believe the story 'Aliens turned our son into a fish finger' so I told the reporter to go to Asda, buy a packet of fish fingers, mix the child in with them and ask the mother if she could pick him out."
He added: "A few days later I was at a conference when Les Hinton came up to me and gave me a copy of this speech he had just given to a convention of editors, where he'd used that story as an example of investigative journalism in the world today."
Livesey began as a sports reporter at the Sunday Sport in 1987 under legendary West Ham and England footballer Bobby Moore, who was then sports editor. Livesey went on to take over as sports editor, before stepping up to deputy editor, then editor. He later switched to the Daily Sport, becoming editor, then managing editor of the group and finally editor-in-chief.
Livesey said of the Sport: "It's a much maligned newspaper in places, but those in the business know that no national newspaper could make a profit from day one to now without being excellent in its field. The Independent launched in the same year as us and it's made a loss every year, as far as I'm aware. We've made a profit every year. When the big stories come along, we do them seriously, but we just try and give people a laugh, and that's all I've done for 18 years."
Livesey said his resignation had nothing to with the paper's circulation. July's Sunday Sport ABC figure was 105,499, down 33.71 per cent year on year.
He said: "The circulation is difficult, but so is every other newspaper. We can't afford to cut the price and we can't afford to give away DVDs inside it. All we survive on is our front cover. The very fact that the Sport survives, I believe, is an absolute Fleet Street miracle."
The Week takes off in US

redpajama_set_name: RedPajamaCommonCrawl


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Rangers set initial opening night roster, K'Andre makes it, Barron does not
January 11, 2021, 7:45 PM ET [236 Comments]
Jan Levine
New York Rangers Blogger •	RSS • Archive • CONTACT
The Rangers all but set their Opening Night roster - at least as of now - with the practice lines Monday. New York is slated to open the 2021 season with 22 players, 13 forwards, seven defensemen and two goals. The Blueshirts placed several players on waivers Monday for the purpose of moving them up to and back from the taxi squad.
Here is what looks like a pretty good indication of what the Rangers opening night lineup will look like. pic.twitter.com/iXlyLQhfbU
— Dan Rosen (@drosennhl) January 11, 2021
The good news is that Mika Zibanejad practiced on Monday. He admitted testing positive for COVID-19, which is why he was delayed joining the team. Now, the only question is whether he will be ready for Thursday. My view is I would love to have the team's #1 captain on the ice, but if it's a question of rushing him back for one game or giving up a few more days to be ready for Saturday and the rest of the season, give the latter 1000 out of 1000 times.
The current fourth line include Brendan Lemiuex, no surprise, Brett Howden, the same, and Phil Di Guiseppe, not a shock as well. Kevin Rooney was the extra skater, an indication of where he falls in the mix and his future usage. Those included in the waiver list are two players who might slide in-and-out of the lineup, Colin Blackwell and Gabriel Fontaine, with Fontaine having a strong camp.
Further indication that Bitetto and Blackwell are heading for the taxi squad. #NYR https://t.co/TOQo4hz3Ha
— Vince Z. Mercogliano (@vzmercogliano) January 11, 2021
Morgan Barron will not make the team initially, but the delay to the start of the AHL season should enable him to stick around. As David Quinn said, Barron might have been trying too hard and also heard all the chatter that he had a good chance to make the squad, amplifying the pressure he put on himself in camp. With that pressure off, a few good weeks at Hartford and we shouldn't be shocked to see him on MSG ice in a game at some point.
"The competition was tight, for sure," Quinn said. "Morgan, we actually talked yesterday. I think Morgan looked nervous throughout most of the camp. People handle expectations differently. I think there was a lot of talk with him maybe to have an opportunity to make the team, and there certainly was an opportunity for him to do that. But it's a big jump.
"He's a really good player," Quinn added. "We love having him here. I'm not going be surprised if he plays games for us this year, but he's just looked a little bit nervous, gripping the stick a little bit too much and worried about not making mistake."
Unless a radical change occurs, K'Andre Miller will be in the lineup against the Islanders, lined up opposite Jacob Trouba. Quinn referred to Miller as "a praying mantis," since at 6-5, he is all arms and legs, making it difficult for opponents to get around him. All d-men have growing pains, so to expect no bobbles would be foolish. But Miller hopefully has the internal fortitude to work through any issues, learn from his mistakes and not make the same ones twice, and build on any success he has. With Miller paired with Trouba, Tony DeAnngelo will skate on the third pair with either Jack Johnson or Brendan Smith, unless a waiver claim is made. In addition, Matthew Robertson, who skated with the parent group in practice today, looks set to make the taxi squad to start the season.
"He's worked hard, he's closed on people, he's made really good decisions with the puck," Quinn said. "From a defending standpoint, he's like a praying mantis with that stick and his arms and his legs. He's tough to get around. When you think you have him beat, there he is with his stick. There's just an awful lot to like about him, and let's not overlook his elite skating for a guy that size."
With the WHL season not slated to start for a while, the Blueshirts signed Braden Schneider to an AHL-only deal. Because the signing is for the AHL, it has no bearing on his ELC, and he would have had to be signed pre-December 31 for a year on the ELC, once signed, to slide, based on his age. But Scheider will get to play at a higher level at least until the Brandon Wheat Kings begins play.
Just checked in with #NYR about signing Braden Schneider to an AHL-only deal, as reported by @PuckPedia.
Plan is for him to play w/ @WolfPackAHL until the WHL season begins, at which point he could return to @bdnwheatkings. It's not an NHL contract and has no bearing on his ELC.
Follow @airjan23
Join the Discussion: » 236 Comments » Post New Comment
More from Jan Levine
» Game 3: NYR-NJ, Same lineup as Saturday to face Devils, ADA to sit again
» Gm 2: NYR 5 NYI 0, Blueshirts flip switch, rebound from Opening Night loss
» GM1: NYI 4 NYR 0, Rangers outplayed and outclassed in season opener
» Rangers kickoff 2020-21 season by facing Islanders at MSG
» Rangers scrimmage Sunday, Zib out, Miller/Trouba as a pairing


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Electronic Soundmaker & Computer Music - Nov 1983	Climb Aboard The MIDI Bus
Climb Aboard The MIDI Bus
Home -> Magazines -> Issues -> Articles in this issue -> View Show Page Scans 2
Climb Aboard The MIDI Bus (Part 1)
by Jim Betteridge
The amazing musical instrument interface
MIDI is the new word — an important development and the cause of many a tentative discussion. In the first of a two part feature, Jim Betteridge takes a look at why it is, what it does and how it does it. Hear the word...
The inconspicuous MIDI In/Out hides a wealth of creative possibilities.
You only have to witness the horrors of the domestic video format war to appreciate the dilemma faced by companies with innovative ideas. A quick glance at JVC's (who developed the VHS format) bank balance might give an insight into the possible monetary gains involved.
The development of the synthesizer is typical of this phenomenon. With the idea and implementation of voltage control (VCOs, VCFs, VCAs etc) came the inevitable differences of opinion and a number of variant approaches to a similar set of objectives. Thus we are stuck with a mixed bag of incompatible standards, such as different levels and polarities for gate and trigger voltages, and logarithmic as opposed to linear VCO voltage/pitch ratios. The time taken to interface a selection of synthesizers began to dwarf the time spent actually composing with them!
Prophetic Purveyors
An instrument's inability to communicate with new equipment means potential obsolescence. It has been agreed for some years that a system which would allow comprehensive interfacing between different makes and models would be of great benefit to all manufacturers, and would allow the musician to purchase an instrument knowing that it won't be made redundant as soon as a new wave of equipment is made available.
It was Sequential Circuits Inc (SCI), purveyors of the legendary Prophet series, who started the ball rolling. They first became interested in the idea of using micros for interfacing in connection with a sequencer designed for use with the Prophet 10. The unit was later made available as an option for the Prophet 5, but was considered too clumsy for general use.
The Universal Synthesizer Interface (USI) was the immediate predecessor to the MIDI, and following discussions with the presidents of Oberheim and Roland, the specification was presented by SCI's Dave Smith and Chet Wood at the 1981 Audio Engineering Society Convention.
Having modified the USI spec in accordance with certain points arising from discussions at the convention, Smith sent out a questionnaire to everyone he could think of in the industry who might be concerned with the project. Following a strong response, all those interested were invited to attend a conference held to coincide with the January 1982, Western National Association of Music Merchants (NAMM) convention in Anaheim.
The Japanese Alternative
Subsequent to this, a group of Japanese companies who had been conducting their own research along the same lines, presented an alternative proposal, and it was the integration of the two ideas by Smith and Wood, which gave birth to the first MIDI (Musical Instrument Digital Interface) specification.
Although a copy was sent to all NAMM participants, it precipitated no further comment, and so after a number of discussions between SCI and Roland (which is serving as a liaison with Yamaha, Kawai and Korg) the final document was drawn up.
At present, the main source of information relating to MIDI is the SCI document entitled "The Complete SCI MIDI", and with the kind permission of SCI, I shall quote a couple of paragraphs to be found in the introduction:
'The purpose of the specification is to enable the easy integration of synthesizers, other electronic keyboards, sequencers, drum boxes and home computers from various manufacturers, into one programmable system. In being made compatible with foreseeable microcomputer technology, the useful lifetime of the musician's equipment is thereby multiplied. The realisation of complex, electronic assisted music hitherto reserved for well financed professionals becomes more widely available. For example, Synthesizers can be easily configured "in parallel", with instruments played simultaneously or remotely. Entire compositions, consisting of monophonic and polyphonic sequences and rhythm, can be played at one touch. The computer terminal can be used for composing, sequence creation and editing. Graphic quality printers can print the "hardcopy" manuscript of an improvisation or composition. Video synthesis can be integrated with music synthesis. Those parts of musical education requiring drill, eg, learning to read music, scale recognition and ear training, can be automated. This frees the teacher's time to concentrate on technique.'
A Logical Solution
As the name suggests, the MIDI system is digitally based, and the different components of a MIDI interface system communicate by means of digital codes.
Digital information is sent in the form of binary encoded numbers and is transmitted electrically by representing the binary digits, ie 0s and 1s with 'low' and 'high' voltages respectively. From the term "Binary Digit" has been derived the word "bit", so that a bit is a 0 or a 1 in a binary encoded number. Digital systems can be referred to in terms of the number of bits which they use in each unit of information, eg 4, 8 or 16. The more bits used, the larger the number which can be represented, and therefore the greater the accuracy or resolution of the system.
A group of 8 bits is called a byte (for 8 bit machines), and the MIDI uses a kind of modified 8-bit system wherein the first bit, called a flag bit, simply defines the nature of the information included in the remaining 7 bits: "Status" (1) or "data" (0). If the first bit, referred to as the most significant (MS) bit, denotes "status", then the following 7 status bits will give information defining the specific command being addressed, eg "key velocity". This will then be followed by a new byte with a flag bit denoting "data", wherein the 7 data bits will define the exact extent of the operation, eg the actual key velocity. At either end of each byte is a "start" and a "stop" bit which simply indicates the beginning and end of a byte of information.
Significant Figures
Bytes of information come under five main headings within the MIDI format. So having laid the foundation I shall once again quote from the SCI information:
'There are five categories of MIDI data. Channel, System Common, System Real Time, System Exclusive, System Reset. Each category encompasses a number of "status bytes" which define specific commands under that category, and which precede data bytes which specify the exact operation. Status bytes are distinguished from data according to whether the most significant (MS) bit is set (1 = status) or reset (0 = data). The status bytes in each category are defined below. Note that any data sets (eg Note On event data) which are sent successively under the same status, can be sent without a status byte until a different status byte is needed.
Channel information performs most of the routine work. Commands are addressed to specific channels by a 4-bit number which is encoded into the status byte. The associated data bytes can identify keys going down (on) and up (off), their on or off velocities, and pressure or 'after touch' (on keyboards so equipped, such as the Yamaha DX7).
System Common, Real Time and Reset information is intended for all channels in a system. System Common information identifies song selections and measure numbers for all units. Real Time information is used for synchronising everything (perhaps to a master sequencer). Therefore Channel and System Common information is interruptible by System Real Time information.
System exclusive information allows the exchange of data which can be formatted as the manufacturer wishes. Only devices which recognise the manufacturer's format will attend the exchange. Reset simply initializes all equipment to power-on condition.'
Parallel Or Serial
The microprocessor in each piece of equipment deals with each byte in "parallel". That is it looks at all 8 bits at the same time through eight different inputs. To send the information in this parallel form would require the use of multi-way connectors and cabling which would add quite considerably to the overall cost of the equipment to which it was fitted. To make this a truly universal interface it had to be inexpensive enough to be fitted to low cost models as well as upmarket equipment, and so a serial format was decided upon.
The data is converted into serial form and the start and stop bits are added, so that the whole set of information can be sent down to a single line to the next piece of equipment where it will be converted back to a parallel format.
The original, pre-MIDI specification had suggested a serial transmission rate of 19.2kBaud (19,200 bits per second) which is the bit rate used by the standard micro computer serial interface "RS232". However, this was criticised for being too slow, in that it could introduce noticeable delays between instruments especially when connected in a complex or extensive configuration. Therefore the rate was upped to 31.25kBaud, which is fast enough for most applications and can easily be derived from dividing a 1MHz crystal by 32.
Forms Of Address
To allow the specific addressing of individual units or, for example, the individual voices of a polyphonic synth, 16 channels of communication have been provided which can be utilised in different ways depending upon the "mode" selected.
Each unit will include separate transmit and receive ports, generally using standard 5-pin, 180 degree DIN sockets, and these will be marked "MIDI IN" and "MIDI OUT" respectively. In addition the manufacturer may add a third port labelled "MIDI THRU", which will allow a duplicate of the information received at the MIDI IN port to be sent on to another unit in the case of a "chain" interconnection configuration.
A further quote from the SCI information will briefly clarify the situation regarding modes:
"There are three modes of operation for transmitters and receivers: Omni, Poly and Mono. Omni mode is the most general level of operation, interfacing all units. Poly mode allows each unit (synth, sequencer or drum box) to be addressed separately. Mono mode is the most specialised, allowing individual addressing of (for example) each synthesizer voice."
At the time of writing, the industry as a whole is remaining somewhat 'mum' on the subject of the practical implications of the system, although there is no doubt that the potential is great. Further Information, in the form of copies of the complete SCI Information booklet may be obtained from: Sequential Circuits Inc., (Contact Details).
Read the next part in this series:
MIDI (Part 2)
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Electronic Soundmaker - Nov 1983
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Intro To MIDI
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Doctor Who: The Angels Take Manhattan review
Doctor Who series 7 episode 5: here's our spoiler-filled review of The Angels Take Manhattan...
By Simon Brew | September 29, 2012 |
This review contains spoilers. Our spoiler-free review is here.
7.5 The Angels Take Manhattan
"I always rip out the last page of a book. Then it doesn't have to end. I hate endings"
If it's all the same with you, we're going to start at the ending, whether the Doctor likes it or not. For Steven Moffat didn't lie: he teased us some time ago that he was going to kill someone off in this episode, and as it turned out, he sent both Rory and Amy to their makers in The Angels Take Manhattan. Granted, he didn't directly do so, as he gave them a good few decades together. But he seemingly slammed the door shut on them, tying up a story that began all the way back in The Eleventh Hour.
And a lovely tie up it was. The bringing back of the young Amelia Pond as a closing shot was a welcome touch, and it feels like it topped and tailed the story of Rory and Amy extremely well. Karen Gillan in particular has been strong in her assertion that she won't be back in the show, even for guest appearances, and in the nicest sense, we hope she won't be. It feels like the natural end of their journey, and if the temptation to bring her back can be resisted, then that'd be all the better in this case. Rory's dad is welcome back anytime, of course.
Not that Amy Pond won't be missed. Amy and Rory had one final adventure here, and Steven Moffat's script gave both Gillan and Arthur Darvill an awful lot of work to do. Confronted with their potential separation, there was humour, action and emotion, and the performances from Gillan and Darvill were both up to the job. We've said before that we're particularly going to miss Arthur Darvill. His performance as Rory has evolved and impressed more and more as the episodes have rolled on.
Matt Smith, though, was also in tip top form, and the foreboding warning that his Doctor should never travel alone came through loud and clear here. It felt like quite a few things were being established for him to consider in the next run of episodes (River, after all, implies that he's gone too far erasing himself from history, basically the reversal of the problem he was up against before), and it'll be interesting to see how those threads develop. For now, not for the first time nor the last, The Doctor was faced with losing dear friends and companions (and just how special Amy was to him was explored in The Power Of Three), and Smith sold the heartbreak and loneliness of this tremendously well.
We also got the return of River Song here. It's always good to see Alex Kingston in Doctor Who, and given that it was her parents who were going away, it was pretty much inevitable she'd be around for their farewell. We don't get vintage River, but her purpose here seems more to be to keep the Doctor, Amy and Rory in some kind of check. That, and she's also the author of the book that provides the spoiler-filled guide to the episode. She had her moments too, especially where she disguised breaking her wrist. And, of course, when she affirmed to her mother the way to get back to Rory at the end. The Doctor may have forgotten that it was her saying goodbye to her parents, but Kingston's performance certainly didn't.
Then there were the Angels. Along with the likes of The Silence, the Weeping Angels are one of the superb new monsters that Steven Moffat has introduced into the world of Doctor Who, but here, they felt a little diluted. The big Statue Of Liberty Angel, for instance, appeared not a million miles removed from the daft massive Cyberman in The Next Doctor, and there was very much a sense that the Angels were out of the shadows, and a little less effective as a result. In The Time Of Angels, for instance, Moffat managed to up the creep factor of them with a dose of Japanese horror. The closest he got here? The baby Angels were good, and opened up a way for them to go in the future. And the smiling Angel proved quite unsettling, too. Yet they didn't feel anywhere near as scary this time around. In fact at one stage, when one Angel is said by River to be screaming, we're almost left feeling sorry for them. That's something of a change in the audience's relationship with them.
Just to temper all of that: while it does seem odd that the weakest part of The Angels Take Manhattan were the Angels themselves, they're still welcome and impressive foes. To keep their level of impact, though, it might work best if they were kept off the regular monsters rota.
The Angels Take Manhattan did have many other elements that were strong. This week's big movie genre of the week was a good, old fashioned detective film noir, and stylistically, this was a treat (and musically, too: Murray Gold's work this seris on Who has been superb). The production design once more delivered here, blending in with some New York location shooting, and the episode looked excellent.
That was established in a really atmospheric pre-credits opening, that teased the detective story – complete with obligatory typewriter – and also reintroduced the aforementioned Angels. It also introduced the particualr time travel element at work, with the older version of Garner meeting the younger one, providing a big clue for what lay ahead. It was a great opening sequence, too, with the Angels at their most sinister in the chase that ensued, only to then be softened by the big Statue Of Liberty Angel at the end of it. The layering of the typewriter over the action was a tremendous touch, though.
Now we've arrived at the start of the episode, though, we're going to end by going back to the finale. For, ultimately, The Angels Take Manhattan was about the exit of Amy and Rory (in an episode that they spend much of parted from each other), and the crater they leave behind in the Doctor's life. It was a suitably emotional farewell. We were left in little doubt that they actually did love each other come the end of their adventures, best demonstrated by the apparent suicide pact – and how dark was that for Saturday night family viewing? – that saw them seemingly leave the Doctor's life. The actual exit came a few minutes later, as the Doctor's joy at their seeming survival quickly turned when an Angel appeared in the graveyard, sending Rory back in time.
It was no surprise to all of us watching that the rug was about to be pulled (the days of surprise departures from Doctor Who seem long gone, not helped by the blanket publicity the show receives, something we're just as guilty of). That said, though, even though we knew their departure was coming, the Doctor begging Amy not to go back to Rory and basically to stay with him – an unusually selfish request – pulled at the heart strings. There was lots of good writing like tat, right throughout the episode.
So where does this leave Doctor Who? Reading around, few are citing the series 7 run thus far as the show firing on all cylinders, but then there's been ambition and variance to the stories Doctor Who has been trying to tell. The Angels Take Manhattan, for us, was a good, solid, really enjoyabe episode, with a big lift at the end. Christmas, though, promises a slightly broken Doctor, and a new traveller in the Tardis. We're rather looking forward to that already. We're going to miss Rory and Amy, though…
See also: where now for Doctor Who series 7?
Follow our Twitter feed for faster news and bad jokes right here. And be our Facebook chum here.
Tags: Arthur DarvillDoctor WhoKaren GillanMatt SmithThe Angels Take Manhattan
Simon Brew	| @SimonBrew
Editor, author, writer, broadcaster, Costner fanatic. Now runs Film Stories Magazine.
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Doctor Who Season 7: Goodbye Ponds
September 25, 2013 | By David Crow


NEW YORK (CBSNewYork) — Two people were fatally shot in separate incidents in Brooklyn early Sunday morning, police say.
According to police, a 26-year-old man was shot multiple times in the torso at East 95th Street and Conklin Avenue at around 2 a.m. The victim was transported to Brookdale Hospital where he was pronounced dead.
Around two hours later, another 26-year-old man was shot multiple times in the torso at 1333 Prospect Place in the Crown Heights section of Brooklyn, police said. The victim was taken to Interfaith Hospital where he was pronounced dead.
The Brooklyn neighbor — who asked to remain anonymous — said the building where the incident took place has caused nothing but trouble.
The names of the victims have not been released, pending family notification.
Anyone with information is asked to call the NYPD's Crime Stoppers Hotline at 800-577-TIPS or for Spanish 1-888-57-PISTA (74782),www.nypdcrimestoppers.com or text tips to 274637(CRIMES) then enter TIP577.


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The Nikon 1 V3 delivers exhilarating performance that will invigorate your passion for photography. Its tilting touch display has virtually zero lag, making it easy to shoot at unusual angles. Its high-end design is so streamlined and comfortable to use, you'll bring it on every outing. For those who like D-SLR-style shooting, add the GR-N1010 Camera Grip and DF-N1000 Electronic Viewfinder and feel right at home with the Nikon 1 V3. If you already own NIKKOR D-SLR lenses, add the optional FT-1 Mount Adapter and use them with the Nikon 1 V3! (The camera's 2.7x crop factor will extend the reach of telephoto lenses—turn a 300mm into an 810mm!) Whether it's a companion to your D-SLR or the centerpiece of your photography system, the Nikon 1 V3 is a camera that's hard to put down.
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Orchard Park è un centro abitato (town) degli Stati Uniti d'America, situato nella Contea di Erie, nello Stato di New York. Nel censimento del 2010 la popolazione era di 29.054 abitanti. La città è stata fondata nel 1850. È un sobborgo a sudovest della città di Buffalo.

Geografia fisica
Secondo i rilevamenti dell'United States Census Bureau, la località di Orchard Park si estende su una superficie di 100,0 km², tutti occupati da terre.

Popolazione
Secondo il censimento del 2010, ad Orchard Park vivevano 29.054 persone, ed erano presenti 7.656 gruppi familiari. La densità di popolazione era di 290,7 ab./km². Nel territorio comunale si trovavano 10.644 unità edificate. Per quanto riguarda la composizione etnica degli abitanti, il 97,90% era bianco, lo 0,48% era afroamericano, lo 0,15% era nativo e lo 0,90% proveniva dall'Asia. Lo 0,19% apparteneva ad altre razze, mentre lo 0,56% appartiene a due o più razze. La popolazione di ogni razza ispanica corrispondeva allo 0,96% degli abitanti.

Per quanto riguarda la suddivisione della popolazione in fasce d'età, il 25,2% era al di sotto dei 18, il 5,7% fra i 18 e i 24, il 25,6% fra i 25 e i 44, il 26,8% fra i 45 e i 64, mentre infine il 16,6% era al di sopra dei 65 anni di età. L'età media della popolazione era di 41 anni. Per ogni 100 donne residenti vivevano 92,6 maschi.

Sport
Orchard Park è nota per ospitare sul suo territorio il Bills Stadium, stadio di football americano dei Buffalo Bills, squadra militante nella National Football League.

Note

Altri progetti

Collegamenti esterni

redpajama_set_name: RedPajamaWikipedia


In past decades, the contractor who had the lowest bid typically got the job. And while low bids are still critical, today that same contractor is likely to be placed on a "Short List" where the contractor will have to sell himself and sell his company to the potential clients. This is usually done through a presentation.
There is no foolproof way to win a bid, but there are a few things you can do to hedge your bets. By using these simple tips, you may be able to increase your chance of getting the job pretty significantly.
Never go into a presentation with a standard, generic proposal. Each buyer is different, and each buyer will have different priorities in choosing a contractor. Remember, no matter what the buyer tells you AFTER the presentation, price is almost never the reason they didn't choose you. The reason that buyers tell us this is that they usually have no other means to make a decision.
Let me explain. Let's say we are writing a proposal for a school district. The buyer, the person making the ultimate decision (by the way, that is usually only one person, even though it may to appear to be a committee,) has a hierarchy of priorities that will influence the decision. This hierarchy will be different for different people, but let's say this particular buyer is primarily interested in the job finishing on time, the safety of the children, the aesthetics of the building, and finally, price-in that order. If this buyer views three proposals all saying basically the same things, "We are the best at finishing on time. Safety is our priority. Look at how beautiful our buildings look." Then the only criteria left to make a decision is price.
If any of the contractors in the above example could have proven beyond a shadow of a doubt that they were indeed the best at any one of those things, then that contractor would have easily made it to the top of the "Short List." Specific evidence that you can do what your buyer wants will set you apart. This evidence could be pictures, testimonials, exhibits, quotes, trade journal articles, and many other forms. The more dramatic the evidence, the more easily it will be remembered. One of my clients photocopied over 100 letters of recommendation and delivered a set to each of the committee members at the conclusion of his presentation. He was the only contractor who offered even one. He got the job and was $250,000 over the lowest bidder.
How do we know what our buyer's hierarchy is? ASK. Call up or visit the people you will present to. Find out what, other than price, is most important and why. Many times, these buyers will tell you in great detail. Make notes and accumulate evidence that supports how you can do what they want.
Right or wrong, people form an impression of how competent we are in the first few seconds that they meet us. Are we nervous? Do we present ourselves in a confident, professional manner? Our confidence when we present is vital to winning over our audience to our way of thinking.
The buyers want to get to know the people they will be working with. They want to know if they can trust the contractor. The contractor who can present confidently and build trust and rapport with the audience has a great shot at getting to the top of the "Short List."
Presenters who have received professional coaching in public speaking skills have a distinct advantage over those who have not.
Doug Staneart, is CEO of The Leader's Institute® Entrepreneur Workshops. He can be reached toll-free at 1-800-872-7830.


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Home / 95.7 THE GAME / Sports / Golden State Warriors / Warriors get stung by Hornets, lose 93-87 at home
Warriors get stung by Hornets, lose 93-87 at home
By Matthew Ashlock 95.7 THE GAME
November 3, 2019 11/03/2019 3:25 am
On the second night of a back-to-back, the short-handed Warriors lost to the Hornets 93-87.
The Warriors had a one point lead with one minute left, but ultimately couldn't close out the game. With D'Lo and Draymond both missing the game tonight, there was no starter from last year's team present in the game.
Charlotte shot 4 free throws in the final minute of the game, missing three of them but yielding two offensive rebounds. That negated the Warriors from even having a buzzer-beating attempt to win the game.
On the bright side, rookie Eric Paschall continued his impressive play. He followed up his 20 point performance last Wednesday against the Suns with a career-high 25 point game tonight. He often looked to be the best player on the floor tonight for the Warriors.
And-1 ------Paschall has 20 pts with 3:00 left in the third quarter pic.twitter.com/Z7xOLpOLCB
— 95.7 The Game (@957thegame) November 3, 2019
The rook flexin' on em like Draymond --pic.twitter.com/z8NSCsuQCO
Late in the fourth, the Warriors and Hornets exchanged blows back and forth, draining threes left and right. Check out this block followed by a game-tying Damion Lee three-pointer:
WCS block, Damion Lee 3, tie game!(-- @gswchris) pic.twitter.com/4eJ85NyymU
There's no one that could possibly fill the hole that is left behind by a Stephen Curry injury, but undrafted rookie Ky Bowman will have his opportunity to shine. He finished tonight's game with 16 points, 7 rebounds, and 4 assists in 38 minutes of action.
Now falling to 1-5, the Warriors are off to rough start. Plagued by injuries, the Warriors young players will look to continue their growth and strengthen their skillsets.
The Warriors will play next on Monday, Nov. 4 against the Trail Blazers at Chase Center. Tip-off is at 7:30pm, coverage start at 6:00pm on 95.7 The Game.
Eric Paschall
ky bowman
Damion Lee


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Lindsay Announces FieldNET Pivot Watch
Lindsay Corporation recently announced the addition of FieldNET Pivot Watch. The patent-pending innovation includes a solar-powered remote telemetry device that mounts onto any center-pivot irrigation system, regardless of pivot age or brand, and a monitor-only subscription to Lindsay's FieldNET irrigation management platform.
FieldNET helps growers optimize water-use efficiency, save time and ultimately improve yields and profit. Zimmatic dealers will begin offering FieldNET Pivot Watch in early summer 2019.
Pivot Watch is compact, lightweight and attaches directly to the span pipe with a simple aluminum band, without the need to connect to the electric circuitry of the pivot. This means growers will have the ability to install Pivot Watch themselves.
Though simple in design and low cost, the device has integrated cellular connectivity, GPS positioning and other embedded sensors, enabling growers to remotely "watch" or monitor their pivot's functions, such as current position, status, direction and speed, using the FieldNET app. With FieldNET Pivot Watch, growers will be able to monitor their irrigation operations around the clock, enabling seamless functionality, 24 hours a day, 365 days a year.
Pivot Watch expands Lindsay's aftermarket FieldNET offering, which also includes full remote monitoring and control with FieldNET Pivot Control, and FieldNET Pivot Control Lite, which offers monitoring and a mid-range of control.
At launch, Pivot Watch will be available with or without a pressure transducer to indicate whether water is on or off, and to display end-of-system pressure. Pricing starts at $299, including the first year, monitor-only FieldNET subscription. After the first year, the subscription will cost $100 per year.
For more information, visit www.myfieldnet.com.
New Capabilities With MyGrower
MyGrower, a mobile and desktop platform from Greenstone Systems, a Cultura company, announced the expansion of its feature set with the inclusion of ACH payment capability, action list functionality, push notifications and biometric security.
With the addition of ACH payment capability, MyGrower can now handle all types of payments. The action list functionality allows growers to submit requests to administrators via the mobile app or desktop portal for items such as settlements, ticket applications and ticket splits.
Administrators can also now send push notifications to users about timely items such as price changes and weather alerts. And finally, with the addition of biometric security login options, users can login to MyGrower quickly and securely with a simple thumbprint or facial scan.
MyGrower was first introduced in 2016 and is the only mobile platform on the market with seamless, real-time workflow into Greenstone's well-known and widely-used ERP system, AGRIS. Through an intuitive and easy-to-use interface, thousands of Greenstone customers can instantly access pertinent information for their growers such as proof-of-yield reports and ticket ownership reports, and can view pre-pay balances and access real-time account data such as grain tickets, contracts and more.
Additional notable expansions to the MyGrower platform since its inception include electronic signature capability (eSign), PayPal integration and browser updates so growers can see up-to- the-second changes to their accounts.
New Features In John Deere Lineup
John Deere has strengthened its lineup of 6R tractors by adding two more models, the 6230R and 6250R that bring customers faster, stronger, smarter tractors in the 6 family that excel in hauling, transport and loader work.
Both models are loaded with new levels of power and premium features to make them an ideal choice for hauling hay, forage and slurry, yet versatile enough for loader and PTO work. The 6230R and 6250R tractors expand the upper limits of horsepower available for the 6R lineup, delivering 230 and 250 rated engine horsepower respectively. When power bulge and John Deere Intelligent Power Management (IPM) are factored in, the larger 6250R is capable of up to 300 horsepower.
To ensure quick acceleration, John Deere included an Infinitely Variable Transmission (IVT) as base equipment on the 6230R and 6250R. Customers have two IVT choices — 25 or 31 miles per hour top speed. Using the stepless IVT, operators can match the exact speed desired for any application ranging from 0.03 mph (.05 kph) up to 25/31 mph (40.23/49.80 kph).
A factory-installed Generation 4 4200 CommandCenter with an 8.4-inch (21.3 cm) color display is another premium feature included as base equipment, or customers can upgrade to the optional 4600 CommandCenter. Customers can also add Field Documentation with an AutoTrac activation and Section Control and Wireless Data Transfer if desired.
For more details about the 6230R and 6250R tractors or to request a demo, visit JohnDeere.com or see your local dealer.
electronic payments greenstone john deere lindsay remote water management	2019-03-01
Vicky Boyd


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1. the mold bar can be designed as a single span of simple branch components and continuous components.
2. span greater than 9 meters timely use of lattice components, and the fulfillment of the pressure flange stability.
3. lattice type wipe bar can be used planar perfunctory frame type, space perfunctory frame or lower support type Purlin.
4. the real abdominal type of purlin should be the use of crimping groove shape, oblique winding cold-formed thin-walled steel and straight rolling edge of the Z-shaped cold curved thin-walled steel.


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Over 200 London gardens to open in a single weekend
June 14th, 2018|
This week, tickets go on sale for Open Garden Squares Weekend 2018 – London's most popular garden-visiting weekend. The annual event allows members of the public exclusive access to some of the capital's most exciting, private and unique gardens, and to take part in a whole range of special events and activities.
Organised by the London Parks and Gardens Trust, and now in its' 21st year, the event highlights the significant social, cultural, environmental and economic contribution that gardens, squares and green spaces make to the capital and its inhabitants.
This year, over 200 gardens will participate in the Weekend – ranging from the historic and traditional to the new and experimental. There are community gardens, gardens in schools and churches, on rooftops, on railway platforms, in skips, behind shops, and floating on the water.
Advance tickets are priced £15, and are available by visiting www.opensquares.org
A single ticket gains access to all gardens (excluding those with special conditions for entry) for both Saturday 9 and Sunday 10 June.
This year, the garden of Number 10 Downing Street will be available via a public ballot, as will a series of guided tours of the rooftop 'skyline' garden at Coutts. Other gardens opening over the Weekend include Nomura International's vast roof-top space, the floating gardens of Garden Barge Square and the flourishing growing spaces of the homeless charity Providence Row. Some of London's premier garden squares will open, including Eaton Square, whose past residents include actress Vivien Leigh and Prime Minister Neville Chamberlain, Belgrave Square, Cleveland Square and Bryanston Square. Visitors can explore the Royal College of Physicians' medicinal garden, The Master's Garden within the Temple complex, the gardens of Charlton Manor Primary School and bee-friendly gardens at Bee Urban and Melissa Garden Bee Sanctuary. All private, but opening their gates to visitors over the Weekend.
Ruth Holmes, Chair of the London Parks & Gardens Trust, organisers of the event, said: "London Parks and Gardens Trust opened the first gardens in 1998, hoping to cultivate knowledge and appreciation of London's green infrastructure network. Today, over two decades on, the Weekend is a powerful celebration of the importance of gardens, squares and green spaces to the social, cultural, environmental and economic life of London."
Highlights for 2018:
New Victoria Hall – The Institute of Ismaili Studies (N1C 4DD) – is a Stanton Williams-designed student residence with two contemporary gardens by landscape architect Vladimir Djurovic. One garden captures the essence of the gardens of southern Spain (on the first floor) and the other the gardens of Morocco (on the eighth floor). Water is a central element in both gardens, whether running through channels or installed as a contained feature.
New 49 Bankside, together with The Deanery (SE1 9JE), are two secret, tranquil gardens next to the Globe Theatre on the Southbank. Both are private, historic residences, accessed via the ancient Cardinal Cap Alley.
New South London Gallery's (SE5 8UH) new permanent garden was created by the Mexican artist Gabriel Orozco, with support from 6a architects and horticulturalists at the Royal Botanic Gardens, Kew. Orozco has exhibited extensively internationally, including a mid-career retrospective at Tate Modern in 2011. He has never before designed a garden, and transformed the largely inaccessible paved area of land at the back of the gallery's main building into a unique sculptural work.
New Cody Dock (E16 4TL) was built on the River Lea in East London in 1871 to service coal barges for the Imperial Chemical Works. Today, with major regeneration underway, it has been transformed into a wonderful community-led riverside gardens with a creative industries quarter. It is situated halfway along The Line, London's first dedicated contemporary art walk from the Queen Elizabeth Olympic Park to The O2.
New Cannon Bridge House Roof Garden (EC4R 2YA). This private roof-top terrace garden is an exemplar of planting for biodiversity, and includes many unusual and exotic plants.
New The Worshipful Company of Stationers and Newspaper Makers (EC4M 7DD). The Company, who received their royal charter under Mary Tudor in 1557, were printers and booksellers, 'stationed' at fixed points in and around St Paul's Churchyard. The hall was rebuilt after the Great Fire of London, along with its warehouse, in which the Stationers kept their stock. These buildings form three sides of a small courtyard garden dominated by a London plane tree, planted in 1837, and said to have gained nourishment from the ashes of illegal books burnt here in earlier times.
Number 10 Downing Street (SW1A 2AA) is the official residence and office of the Prime Minister of the United Kingdom, and also the place where the Prime Minister welcomes guests – from Her Majesty The Queen to world leaders to businesses and charities. The terrace and garden at Downing Street were constructed in 1736 shortly after Walpole moved into Number 10. Entry by public ballot, no purchase necessary, see opensquares.org to enter.
Coutts (WC2R 0QS) – the Skyline garden is the brainchild of executive chef Peter Fiori and was created by the horticulturalist Richard Vine with the help of the Clink charity based at HMP High Down in 2012. It lies on each side of a narrow walkway around the roof of the building, and includes a south-facing fruit garden, a kitchen garden and a cottage garden.
Core Landscapes Community Plant Nursery and Garden (E1 2JL) is a permanent movable pocket garden and plant nursery. Now in its third site since 2009, it is transforming meanwhile spaces in deprived urban areas into hubs to promote positive mental health for all. Each move tightens the project and improves ways to grow in containers. The garden includes a container-based orchards, herbaceous borders, pond, mini-allotment, garden, plant nursery and a bus!
Providence Row (E1 7SA) is a charity supporting homeless and vulnerable people in East London and providing accredited gardening training. On the rooftop a secret garden with a wide range of fruit, vegetables, herbs, edible flowers and bees supplies the kitchen so it can prepare between 30-50 breakfasts and lunches daily!
Website: opensquares.org
Twitter: @OpenSquares #OGSW18
Instagram: opensquaresweekend
Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/LondonOGSW/
Ticket information: one ticket gains access to all gardens (excluding those with special conditions for entry) for both Saturday 9 and Sunday 10 June. Advance tickets are priced £15. A ticket bought over the weekend is priced £20. Children under 12 go free.
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Number 10 Downing Street opens for Open Garden Squares Weekend 2019
Museum of Architecture's Gingerbread City at the V&A
Email: sarah@sarahharrisonpr.com
Enjoyed a visit to London's gingerbread city. Had to buy some gingerbread on the way out as it smelt so good.… twitter.com/i/web/status/1…
Happy New Year from all of us! Good to see that #theGingerbreadCity2019 @MoA_News @SomersetHouse share our goal inv… twitter.com/i/web/status/1…
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The Chariot 2 iScrub 20 Deluxe with Orb Technology is the ultimate scrubber for efficiency. We combined the productivity of our stand-on Chariot line with our patent pending orbital technology into one superior machine. The dual-motion of our Orb technology provides the best scrubbing action on the market. Unlike traditional machines, the Chariot with Orb generates thousands of 3/8" orbit contact points that spin at 1725 revolutions per minute, while at the same time it spins within an 80 rpm rotational movement. These thousands of orbital drive contact points provide the highest level of mechanical action on the market today. This scrubber is excels at chemical-free stripping, top-scrubbing for refinishing and green low-chemical cleaning.
Designed with Windsor Kärcher Group's Chariot Patented Stand-On Cleaning Technology* that significantly increases productivity and cleaning quality.
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Police say a man has been arrested on suspicion of grooming after an apparent sting operation which was broadcast on social media.
A 59-minute live video stream posted by vigilante group Justice For The Innocent on Wednesday evening (November 28) showed a man being confronted outside a property in Yeovil.
It alleged the man had been communicating with what he thought were children.
A spokeswoman for Avon and Somerset Police said on Thursday: "Police arrested a 20-year-old man on suspicion of child grooming offences following an incident in Yeovil on Wednesday evening.


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10 years ago on November 15, 2008 my son died. And I would never be the same. Forever changed. Forever would my view of this world, of parenting, of being a mother, of being a wife and a friend and a daughter be changed. Forever would my view of God be different. It would take many months, years even, before I would be able to accept this new reality and begin to see all the changes in me as a gift. But after 10 years of grief I can say that good things can come from brokenness, good things can come from ashes. Hope can be restored. Joy can be had. In today's episode I'm sharing with you 10 ways I have seen God bring about purpose from my pain.
As mentioned in the podcast, I've compiled a list of characteristics and attributes of God for you to study and pray through on your own. Even if you are not sure about this God or faith thing I encourage you to see what the Bible has to say about God. This resource has been adapted from this post by Josh McDowell Ministry.
James 1:2-4 says: Count it all joy, my brothers, when you meet trials of various kinds, for you know that the testing of your faith produces steadfastness. And let steadfastness have its full effect, that you may be perfect and complete, lacking in nothing.
As I look back over the past 10 years I can see that the testing of my faith has not been without purpose.
God's promise in that verse in James is that my pain was never in vain, and neither is yours — He is working to make our faith in Him stronger, full and complete, lacking nothing. I want to share with you 10 ways I have seen God bring about purpose from the pain.
Number 1. What Really Matters.
The very first change I recognized in myself was an instant shift in my heart and mind about what really matters. I had spent my entire life up to that point focused on periphery non-essentials, things that, while valuable, were not the most important thing. I am an overachieving perfectionist which means I can very easily major on the minors, investing too much time, energy, thought and everyday life into details that just aren't the most important thing — constantly being anxious and worrying over things that I won't remember a few days into the future, easily saying yes to too much and too often because a part of me actually thinks I can fix all the world's problems, at least the ones I can see. For much of my life this meant constantly having a calendar too full with too many responsibilities, roles and projects going at any given time and a brain and a heart that were frazzled at best — which left the most important things in my life getting the worst of me. My son's death immediately provided for a wake-up call to re-evaluate where I invested my life; what was allowed to get the attention of my mind, the affection of my heart and space on my calendar.
My son's death gave me a new perspective, while those around me fretted about non-essentials I could easily see now how most of what had filled my mind and heart before November 15 just didn't qualify as something worthy of giving so much of my life to. See, when confronted with death you suddenly realize how fragile it is, how fleeting, how precious your days are and that nothing beyond right now is guaranteed. I suddenly had this simple framework for making decisions — is this life or death? Quite literally? Does this deserve to take up such limited and precious space in my mind and heart and calendar? If I don't have tomorrow how does that change how I spend today?
And I don't mean that in a way that would suggest to try and tackle all your bucket list big dreams every single day — I mean what does it look like to invest your life, your heart and mind and soul, in what really matters, to find joy in the seemingly mundane, to wash the dishes in a way that is worshipful, to do the work before you with purpose and discipline, to make time for meaningful conversations, to stop and wander — my son's death showed me what it was like to not be so divided. To be able to slow down and engage life in a way that felt purposeful and meaningful. This is still something I wrestle with almost daily and am far from perfect in this regard but it's something I am forever aware of and grateful for; forever changed.
Number 2. What Happens When God Says No.
I can still picture that hospital waiting room and the moment my husband came in and shook his head 'no.' We were begging God for a miracle and God had answered. He had answered "no." I was a girl who grew up in a Christian home, went to church on Sundays and Wednesdays and any other day the doors were open. Even in my early college days of wild rebellion my heart loved God, trusted Him and His Word — even when my life displayed a girl caught in the confusion of who she was and what she believed. And even the seasons surrounding my son's death was filled with a life, a marriage and a family, our entire life, all dedicated to God's purposes — see, the year my son died had been a year full of praying and preparing to move and start a new church in a new city.
We had given our entire lives up to that point, and now our future, for the ministry of God's people. And somewhere in our hearts we believed that protected us from suffering like this. Maybe we believed that God owed us something. Maybe we believed all of our spiritual activity made us immune to such pain. But God had let death in and this was a blow that would shake my fickle and shallow faith — it would expose a heart that desired the gifts more than the giver, the healing more than the healer. When God said "no" everything I thought to be true about Him now came in to question. Who was this God I had given my life to? Who was this God I thought I loved? The God who I trusted?
Those questions, when I finally felt the freedom to actually acknowledge their existence — that would take some time, eventually led to a crisis of faith that ultimately revealed God's deep love for me, not my deep love for Him. Because my deep love was based on condition — how good He was to me in the moment. While my love was conditional, His was without condition, forever unconditional. While my faith was fickle. He was and is forever faithful. Even in death. Even in pain. Even in suffering. What God revealed to me is not a cliche, when God says no to one thing He says yes to another, you know the old adage, when one door closes another window opens — no gift God would give in the future, apart from Himself, would ever replace the life of my son. So no it wasn't that God was saying yes to something else.
What I learned from God saying no was that He is far bigger than the God I had created Him to be. For example, I think my first honest, real, desperate cries to Him were after my son died. My former self, caught up in the external evidences of faith, would have never cried out in such a way — with prayers of doubt and anger, prayers that exposed my fears and my fickle faith. Prayers that shouted "Where were you? You could have stopped this? Why didn't you stop this?" See, I learned that when God acts in a way that challenges what you believe to be true about Him, it forces you to either wrestle with Him about this new reality or it causes you to run from Him. Either way God saying no exposes the reality of our hearts. What we really believe. And God saying no, taught me that He is big enough to handle my doubt, my fear, my fickle faith. He isn't going anywhere. And He is better and bigger than the gifts He gives and the healing He brings.
Maybe you're here and you are like me, you grew up with a knowledge and experience of God, you professed faith and love for God but after such heartbreak you're wondering those same questions: Where were you God? Maybe your faith feels weak or even non-existent. My encouragement to you is to wrestle. Cry out to God, feel the freedom to say out loud what's filling up the crevices of your heart, God already knows it and He's big enough to handle all your wanderings. I had a friend who experienced multiple miscarriages and in a season where she wanted nothing to do with God she said "I pray for the want to, to want to" and you just go back as far as you need to with those "want to's". Maybe you're at a "God give me the want to to want to to want to." I believe He is faithful to hear those prayers and answer. He isn't a tricky God and desires for you to come to Him in prayer.
Maybe you've found yourself here because you're searching. You're heart is broken. You've tasted death and now you're looking for hope and part of you wants to know more about this God and faith thing. You're desperate for a glimmer of hope, a glimmer of joy again. My encouragement to you is that if that's you — I don't think it's coincidence or chance that you're listening right now — and the God of the universe loves you and desires to be in relationship with you. My wrestling and my searching led me to seek out the truth from God's Word, the Bible, about who He is and who He says we are. And in God's Word we see that He, being a perfect and holy God, created a perfect world but that we, as His creation wrecked it — we thought we knew better, we didn't trust Him at His Word, BUT in His great love for you and me He has provided a way in which He has made hope for the broken, healing for the hurting, hope for eternity; He has made a way for humanity to be connected to Him through the life, death, burial and resurrection of His Son Jesus. Because Jesus' sacrifice we can be connected to Him, we can have peace and joy amidst tragedy, and we can have hope that believes there is more than this, more than this broken world, we can look forward to eternity.
Maybe this is the first time you are hearing this message of hope, or maybe you've heard this a dozen times but it seems unnecessary or too good to be true. But this is the truth — God loved you so much that even at your worst, your darkest, your most sinful and ugly, that's when Jesus died for you — not when you had it all together but in that moment, at your worst. He said, "I'm going to save you at your worst to prove to you that there is nothing you need to bring to the table, nothing I need from you." The truth of this message offers hope for now and hope for eternity. Belief in Jesus as King reminds us that this world is not our home. That one day all that has been broken will be made whole again. And that belief gives us joy for today, because we know this isn't the end.
Number 3. What Does the Bible Actually Say.
I wonder how much of my faith before my son died was based solely on my own thinking, with no substance to back it up, no authority. Maybe I had gathered ideas from what culture tells us about who God is or even from the slew of pastors I had heard growing up. And while pastor's are helpful (I love pastors, my husband is one!) their words can never replace God's Words — especially in a crisis of faith. See my son's death forced me to actually figure out what I believed — no longer could I naively say that God was good. It's relatively simple for someone who isn't walking through the valley of the shadow of death to proclaim God's goodness. It's much harder to walk through loss and death and say with assurance — God is good. He's here and He's working and I trust Him. I felt disappointed in God, as though He had let me down so it naturally became harder to say He is worthy of my life and my heart, my affection and my worship. How do you say that of someone who you think has hurt you? I mean, how does a good God let such darkness in? And if He was in control why didn't He stop this? And let's be honest does He even love me? Better yet, is He even real?
Those questions tormented me and what I realized was that in order to answer those questions I had to go to the best and most reliable source, the Bible. I needed to know what God said about Himself. Who was this God I had given my life to? Who was He really? And what I found was far richer and deeper and bigger than I could have imagined. See, we live in an era of christianity that shouts God is for you, for you in a way that communicates a life free of pain, a life full of abundant material blessings, plans for a prosperous future and all things working together for your good — for years we've taken snippets of verses out of the Bible and without truly understanding their context we've applied them to God's relationship with us. The problem is that it makes the entire thing about us. About you and about me.
Stay with me here, while God loves you more than you could ever imagine, this isn't about you or about me — this is about Him and His glory. And if our foundation about who God is is based on how prosperous our life is going at any given time our faith will be as fickle as a roller coaster. We need a better understanding of who He is so that when we are confronted with tragedy and brokenness, with death and sorrow, when our plans fail and we can see no good at all, we can turn to God and see Him as friend, protector, provider, redeemer — not the enemy. When we have a better understanding of who God is we can turn to Him because we will know that He didn't cause the pain and also that this isn't some form of punishment either.
We could gain a better understanding from a passage like Romans 8:1 or 2 Corinthians 5:21 that communicate that when we believe in Jesus as Savior we have been made righteous, we have been made clean, that when God looks at you He see Jesus — so there is no condemnation, there is no longer a need for punishment of sin, Jesus already did that for you. Which means what you are going through right now is not a form of punishment. God is not punishing you.
Or if you are believing that you could have done something to prevent this pain or that the death of your baby is your fault we could look at a passage like Job 42:2 or Isaiah 14:27 that give us a reminder that God alone is in control. To think that we could stop death gives ourselves too much credit, too much power. God being in control is a hard reality to wrestle with because if He was in control then He also could have stopped this pain. That is a wrestle worth talking to God about — and in the end sometimes that means understanding and trusting that God's ways are higher than ours, we cannot fully grasp the mind of God or perfectly interpret why or how He is works in the ways that He does. He is God and we are not.
Another helpful passage that brings about a better understanding would be James 1 where we get a reminder that this world is broken and because it is broken we should expect suffering. But that passage also reminds us that while trials can be expected so can the idea that God is using those trails to strengthen our faith in Him.
Psalm 23 reminds us that no matter how dark the valley we are never alone. God never leaves us and that message is repeated over and over and over again throughout the Old Testament in books like Deuteronomy and Joshua and again in the New Testament in passages like Romans 8 where see that nothing can separate us from God.
And one of my personal favorites that gives me a better understanding of where God is in the midst of pain would be John 11 where we see Jesus broken and weeping over death. He is not apathetic towards your pain. And because we see God's plan for the future in books like Revelation we know that one day He will restore all that has been broken and all that has been lost and that brings me so much hope.
I could go on and on about the truths I found in the Bible about who God is, reliable truths worth staking your future eternity on as well as your current hope and joy. I've listed a few additional truths you can research on your own over on the show notes for this episode. I encourage you to see what the Bible has to say about this God I'm talking so much about. And if you are finding it hard to believe a specific character trait of God, pray that to Him. Tell Him you are having a hard time believing that to be true and ask Him to help you believe or to help you to better understand.
I still wrestle with those truths but I have a foundation to stand on, a foundation that reminds me that God is for me, but not necessarily in the way that world or American christianity tell me He is, no in a far deeper and richer way.
Number 4. Eyes on Heaven.
Maybe everyone's like this but I feel like thoughts of death and what happens after this life started a bit young for me. I can vividly remember being 7 years old laying in my bed, my heart beating so fast and so loud that I was sure my mom could hear it from the other room; fear had gripped my young mind as I considered death and realized I was utterly afraid to die. Perhaps it's the unknown of it or the lack of control over it, either way I have never been one too look forward to what's after this life and would do my best to not even think about it. Instead I focused on what I could see, what I know, what I understand and at some point I began living in a way as if this were it — this was all there is. I put all my hope into this life working out perfectly, all my effort was spent on building a life here. And here in America and even within American Christianity we believe that we can live our best life right now. We can work hard and reach our goals and achieve our dreams and as long as we're kind and treat people well and recycle and eat organic produce everything is going to work out just as we planned.
But that kind of living forgets God and forgets His Bible. Because this world is broken. And when we put all our hope in finding perfection here we are setting ourselves up to be drastically disappointed. I'm just saying, hearing the words "there is no heartbeat" or having to leave a hospital with empty arms or burying a son is not my definition of living my best life now. Listen if this is all there is I don't want any part of it.
Through my son's death I learned what it meant to long for heaven. To not see this temporal place or this life as more than just that, temporary. Once that shift takes place in your heart you begin to live life a little differently. You aren't as surprised by the brokenness and you aren't as defeated either — because you know that one day all things will be made new; that one day God is going to set it all right again. You are just able to see what matters, like I mentioned in #1, a little more clearly.
Number 5. My Need for God.
I'm not sure if it's a personality issue or something from my childhood or just being a human but I hate being needy. I want to be the strong one, the in control one, the able to conquer all things in front of me with efficiency and a big smile on my face. I think part of me believed that God would love me more if I needed Him less. So that's how I lived. Held God at a distance, never wanting Him to get too close because then He would see how messy my heart really was. Of course this only revealed my deep misunderstanding of who God is. No matter how hard I try to hide, He knows me better than I know myself. He knows all my thoughts and He still loves me. He's not disappointed in my mess or my neediness. BUT I didn't fully recognize that truth or understand it's beauty until my life fell apart.
This believing that "God expects me to hold it all together" was never more pervasive than when I lost my first baby and walked through the agony of miscarriage. I can see that looking back now — how I didn't trust God with my neediness, with the pain and hurt and deep agony that a mother experiences when her baby dies. I kept that loss neat and tidy. I was full of fear and guilt and confusion and bitter jealousy over every pregnant woman I encountered but I never prayed about any of those things, never voiced them, just stuffed them way down deep and pretended God wouldn't see or know. I was desperate for God's peace, in great need of hope and joy and yet I didn't understand that dependence on God is good — needing Him is good, recognizing my need for God is the point. But I didn't, so I moved on quickly — putting all my focus on getting pregnant again. I don't think I fully allowed myself to grieve the loss of that baby until after my first son was born and I came to grips with what I had lost.
And it wasn't until that fateful day when I awoke to my lifeless son Aaden, my nearly 6 week old perfectly healthy baby boy, that I began to recognize my absolute need for God. No longer was I able to keep up the facade of a neat and tidy heart. No longer could I pretend that I had it all together. No longer could I ignore the fear and guilt and confusion and bitter jealousy.
I had suddenly been confronted with the reality that I actually have no control. None. Our American culture tries to tell us to make our own destiny, that we can do anything, that we are in control of our lives — but in reality we are only in control of the way we handle the reality right in front of us. I had always been powerless over life and death but suddenly I knew it to be true first hand. I had always needed God but now I knew it to my core. I would not be able to take another breath unless He put air in my lungs. I was desperate. This sudden realization of my true lack of control made my need for God ever more real. I am powerless but He is powerful. And never not in control. Never not on the throne, ruling and reigning.
You know what this means? He welcomes you and me and all our brokenness. We don't have to try and hide it from Him. And He promises to be with us, to be our God, to be our help and strength. He promises to hold us up when we just can't.
Number 6. My Need for Community.
You know one way God tangibly held me up? People. Just like Number 5, I hardly recognized my need for community until my life fell apart. I like to be the strong one, the one who doesn't need help but all that changed when I experienced the death of a baby. I needed people on their knees in that hospital waiting room. I needed people to cry out to God the prayers I could not muster when God said no. I needed people to open His Word and faithfully read it out loud to me. I needed people to pray me to sleep. I needed people to remind me of God's character and His goodness. I needed people to remind me to take a shower. I needed people to remind me to eat and brush my teeth and get dressed. I needed people to make sure I showed up at the gym twice a week so they knew that at least twice a week I put on some kind of clothes and got out of the house. I needed people to take care of my 17 month old because I was just too afraid. I needed people to gift us a funeral and a place to bury our son. I needed people to clean the house I just couldn't go back to. I needed people to help me pack my baby boys' things away.
And even though it looks differently than it did in those early days of grief I still need people now — I need them to pray for me when I'm hurting a little extra. I need them to remind me of God's goodness and faithfulness because I'm so forgetful. I need them to say my son's name out loud and tell me they remember.
For the past 10 years community has been an extension of God's grace to me. They've held me up.
No one is immune to this. God created all of us for community. It's one of His great gifts to us. And while people can hurt us, they can say and do the wrong things — the risk is worth the reward.
I am forever a different kind of woman because of my son's life and death. And one of the most clear evidences of that difference is the way my heart breaks for another grieving mother. To some that might sound a bit strange but I see it as a gift to be able to truly identify with someone who is hurting, to look them in the eye and I say I understand, I've been there — it is so comforting to offer a message of "you're not alone in this" to another hurting mother. And truly understanding what someone else is walking through means I know exactly how to be praying, I can offer wisdom about what to expect, what's going to be extra difficult, what to be prepared for; having been there I know how to meet physical needs and help those around them understand this new reality as well.
My heart physically aches when I hear of a mother losing a baby. A knot fills my throat and hot tears fill my eyes. I ache at what's been lost and I ache at the thought of the pain to come. But amidst the ache I can, with confidence, say to another grieving mother, you will laugh again, you will have hope again, you will get through this but you will never forget your baby. Not because I'm a counselor or a grief expert or a motivational cheerleader, but simply because I've been there. Because I know.
It is unlikely that anything impacted my mothering more than the life and death of my son Aaden. See when you lose a baby your heart shifts and now you see it all very differently. When I would hear my baby's early morning cries, actual relief would sweep over me. While most mother's probably give a tired sigh at the sound of a baby's cry in the morning – I would nearly squeal with delight. Because they were alive. We had made it through another night. With my two children I had after Aaden died I never minded the middle of the night feedings or irrational crying or even the messy blow outs. Why? Because it meant I had a living baby. There is just a different kind of joy and gratitude that takes up residence in the heart of a mother who has experienced the loss of a baby. That doesn't mean I am never frustrated or tired or angry; and that doesn't mean that mothering comes super easy or that I never take it for granted; no it just means that my son's death taught me what a gift it is and how quickly it can be taken and so I do my best to actually view it that way, that getting the chance to mother a child is a gift worth treasuring. Even in the sleepless nights or terrible twos or sassy sixes. Even in all the mess and imperfection.
Number 9. Joy and Sorrow Can Coexist.
I used to think that joy was the absence of sorrow but I've since learned that joy and sorrow are two different things but the presence of one does not mean that the other cannot also be present. Thinking that those two feelings could not happen simultaneously added an extra layer of confusion in the early days of grief — was it ok to laugh when my heart was so broken? Did that mean I loved my son less or missed him less? Did the presence of joy mean I had moved on? When I began to understand that being joyful or even experiencing moments of happiness, of laughter and light heartedness did not cancel out the sorrow, I felt much more comfortable and at ease with the awkward dance of grief — the dance where in one moment you can experience both joy and deep sorrow. I can look at my nephew who was born just days before my son Aaden and I can experience both joy and sorrow, joy over the boy he's growing to be and also sorrow as I think of what I've lost. It's a dance. And knowing that both can exist and that one doesn't cancel out the other and that it's ok to feel the awkwardness of it takes some of the confusion out of life after grief.
And lastly, Number 10. I can do hard things.
Not because I'm superhuman now or am awesome in and of myself but because I lived a nightmare and know for sure, for certain, without question that God never left me alone. He was right there, giving strength and help and holding me up. So not only do I not have to be afraid of the hard things. I can actually face them knowing I have the strength and the power and the help and God's hand holding me up.
I can walk through the valley of the shadow of death and see it for what it is — just a shadow. Because of Jesus, death has been defeated and that means I don't have to fear a shadow. It can't hurt me ultimately.
And I know that one day all hard things will have their end. Which means I can face them knowing this isn't the way God intended it to be nor is it the way it will be forever. It's the difference between running a race when you have no idea where the finish line is versus running a race where the finish line is in sight. You can run harder, with more purpose and endurance, without fear because you know the end will come. That is my reality as a believer — I can run this hard, difficult and often painful race because I have the end in sight, I know the pain and suffering will not last forever, I have the day in sight when all will be restored and be made right, new and complete. A day when I will see my son again.
So to my friends walking through death and loss, carrying such painful loads, know this, your pain is not without purpose. God is working beauty from ashes in you. And a day is coming when all of the pain and suffering will see it's end, a day when all will be made right and your heart will be made whole again. Until that day, know that God has never left you nor will He ever. He is your strength and your help and He is holding you up. And you are more loved than you could ever know.


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