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Aurora Urvon
Started by Haelbarde, May 18 2015 12:26 AM
#1 Aurora Urvon
Noble Rioter
Relationship StatusSingle
OriginLuthadel
Allomantic StatusRecently Outed
Contact: PM first, IM after I've talked to you
Name: Aurora Urvon
Place of Origin: Felisse
Occupation: Socialite
Relationship Status: Single (for now)
Metals Used: Zinc
Degree of Skill: Advanced
Status: Known
Aurora is reasonably tall, though not the 6'3" of her father, and slim like her mother, though not for the lack of eating. She has the black hair and brown eyes of her father. She often wears the house colors of maroon and silver not just out of a sense of duty, but because maroon is also her favorite color. When she can, she'll wear metal jewelry, though only if it can be easily and quickly detached – a result of having an annoying Coinshot for a brother. Her jewelry will usually be something silver with inset rubies, often a just a necklace, and real metal more often than not.
She always holds herself straight, never slouching unlike her brother, endeavoring to always move as gracefully as possible. Her face often will be seen bearing a pleasant smile, and it's a rare thing to see anger or annoyance flash across her face in public, even when she is angry or annoyed.
Unlike her brother, she has inherited her father's social and negotiation skills, and she endeavors to replicate her mother's firm, quiet presence, though she suspects that it's something that is easier to pull off the older you are. She has a deep respect for her mother, and constantly seeks her father's approval of her. Her brother constantly frustrates her, but the frustration is born mostly from him not meeting the high expectations she holds for the position he holds as Heir to a House seeking to ascend.
She doesn't have any special opinions about skaa. They, like a lot of minor nobles, are all the same to her. Beneath her. As House Urvon sets its sights on ascension, she only has time for time for those of similar or greater rank, unless they are of some benefit to Urvon, or are an obstacle to remove.
She is aware of the stigma associated with Rioters or Soothers – she sees glimpses of it in the eyes of her father. Thus she has made herself a rule to govern her allomancy. She will only use it to the benefit of House Urvon, but never to the detriment of a friend.
Special Skills: Negotiation
Strengths: She's great at talking to people, and an excellent negotiator without the use of allomancy, thus even better when she does, though she's not had the opportunity to take part in any major contract negotiations yet.
Weaknesses: She has had basically no combat training, and while she has seen death occur, she's never been required to witness an execution, or had to perform one herself, managing thus far to avoid being too aware of the grittier side of the Final Empire. Thus, she would be useless in a real fight.
Though House and family come first, she has promised herself to never use her allomancy to the detriment of a friend. Fortunately these haven't yet come into conflict, but she does not know what she would do should that time come.
Aurora was born in the year 900 to Bernard and Katarina Urvon. She was their second child, their first being Astor who was now a year old. As a young child, she got her share of attention from her parents, though she was too young to truly remember it. However, by the age of four, she decided that Astor got more attention than she did, and so a rivalry between the pair quickly arose. Whether or not it was true then, it certainly become so. Their father Bernard was the Heir to House Urvon, and the current Lord was the getting old. Were he to pass on, Bernard would become Head, and thus Astor would be the favorite to become the new Heir. This was accentuated by the fact that while Bernard really connected with Astor, the same connection was never quite there with Aurora, something which would only worsen through time. Wanting the same sort of attention from her father that Astor got, she would try her hardest to do the best at whatever she tried her hand at, to make him proud of her. When they started getting formally educated, though Astor started first, Aurora quickly overtook. When this didn't help to get Bernard to connect with Aurora, this quickly became a point of contention with her brother. Though she knew was better than a lot of things than him, he was their father's favorite, and she blamed her brother for that fact, rather than her father. She would pester and tease him constantly, whether about how slow he was at learning, or about always reading something.
The same issue did not occur with their mother. Knowing Bernard struggled to connect with Aurora, she made sure watch out for Aurora in particular. As they grew older, and Bernard spent time reading and dueling with Astor, Katarina would spend time with Aurora. Aurora looked up to her. She had a firm, quiet, yet powerful presence that she projected into the space around her, wrapped up in the way she dressed, held herself, and spoke. Katarina would personally mentor her in becoming a proper noblewoman: the importance of posture, how to move gracefully, how to choose an ensemble to wear, etc. The one thing that she refused to let Aurora do was duel, being adamant that 'combat training is not for proper noblewomen'. She would later be given some training in self-defense, and taught the basics of how to hold and use different weapons, but not much more than that. This would be a contention between the siblings. It was the one area in which Astor excelled, and the one she couldn't touch.
When each of them reach the age of 10, they were Snapped. Astor Snapped a Coinshot, and for the next year he was completely insufferable. Whereas before she could bully him around if she wanted, anything she said just bounced off. He was special. He was an allomancer. He could fly if he wanted to. Worse, he took every opportunity to rub it in. Particularly if he could catch her wearing metal, something she'd tend to do when dressing up as a 'noblewoman going to a ball'. Though she complained about it, no one paid her complaints much attention. She learned two things quickly though. Don't wear impractically tall high heels (being tall for her age already, this was not likely to be an issue), and only wear metal jewelry that can be quickly and easily detached. This is something she has stuck with ever since, often wearing a single piece of jewelry – a necklace to match her outfit, made with a clasp easy to pull off in an instant. When her turn came, she Snapped a Rioter. It was what she'd hoped for, if not straight out Mistborn. It was also perfect for rubbing her allomancy in Astor's face. Now, when she pestered him, she could make him feel what she wanted him to.
Eventually, the allomantically enhanced bickering between the two came to a head. Aurora pushed Astor too hard, causing him to snap, furious at her. He burnt his own metals and threw around, pushing nearby metals, some ricocheting off walls and hitting her. She was fortunate to only receive bruises and a few cuts. Both of them were sternly reprimanded for this. The result was a truce of sorts. Though it wasn't cut out entirely, they kept the bickering to a minimum. At her mother's suggestion, she decided that she needed to make rules for how she would use her allomancy. These evolved throughout the years, before settling on just a single statement. She would only use her allomancy for the benefit of House Urvon, but never to the detriment of a friend.
Only weeks after this incident came the death of Alfred Urvon, Head of House Urvon. Their father had been Heir, so he become Lord Urvon, the Head of the House. She had always sort of known that their father was going to become the Head of the House, but the true import of this only struck her once it had become a reality. Her or her brother would one day take over from their father and run House Urvon. This inspired her to throw herself at her studies with fresh enthusiasm. She wanted to have prepared as best she could, should it fall to her to run the House one day. She wanted to prove to herself, and to her family, particularly her father, that she would be able should that day come.
While she excelled in most areas she studied, her fortes were her negotiation skills and her allomancy, though really, they were basically the same thing. Negotiation required one to be able to read the others involved, knowing what to do or say at the right time to make them do precisely what you wanted. The real power of emotional allomancy came from knowing how subtlety influencing the right emotion, thus feeding on her knack for negotiation. The reverse is also true. Her allomancy was all the more effective for knowing how to take advantage of the state her allomancy put her target in. The other part of her allomantic training was to recognize the effects of allomancy being used on her. She would come to love the opportunity to negotiate. She'd often argue with her tutors, before negotiating deals that let her get her way. Of course, in reality the tutors got the better bargain, often getting her to do more work willingly as a result of her 'negotiations', claiming it was a bargain that she was getting. But she didn't know better at the time.
Astor did not take the whole affair of being a potential Heir quite so seriously. While he did adequately in his studies, he painfully socially awkward, something made clear once he debuted. He still spent most of his time dueling and reading, particularly after discovering the library at the Canton of Doctrine. Thus their childhood rivalry evolved in an immense frustration on Aurora's part due to her brother. Though obviously unsuitable to be Heir, and thus the future ruler of House Urvon, Astor was their father's favorite, Bernard growing even more distant from Aurora after she snapped due to her emotional allomancy, and so it was likely to be Astor who would be eventually formally named Heir. Aurora wouldn't have minded so much if she thought he was capable, but as far as she could tell, he wasn't trying to lift his game. So, her pestering focused on trying to get him to better prepare himself to be Heir. It didn't have its desired outcome, but she didn't know what else she could do.
In the year just prior to their debut, Bernard started to take Astor or Aurora (though never at the same time) along to some of his business meetings. Aurora always loved these. It was time she got to spend with her father, but it was also a great opportunity to see different places and people. In later years, she'd look back at these as being what ignited her interest in negotiations.
It was during one of these that she met Rosalie Deveaux for the first time. Bernard had been looking to improve relations with House Deveaux for some time, and often met with people in Keep Deveaux. Aurora had been waiting outside a room where her father was finishing a conversation with some Deveaux businessman, when a girl that looked around her age walked past. It was obvious she wasn't a servant, so Aurora, with a smile and a curtsey, said "Hello!" The girl smiled, though she looked a bit unsure of herself. "Hi…" came the reply. Aurora introduced herself. "Aurora Urvon." After a pause, "Rosalie Deveaux" came the reply. "Pleased to meet you, Rosalie Deveaux. I'm here with my father." She pointed over her shoulder with her thumb at the room behind her. "He's still in there talking to someone." Before Rosalie got to reply, the door opened, and Bernard walked out.
"I see you've made a friend there, Aurora." He turned to Rosalie. "I'm sorry to say we need to hurry off."
Bernard began walking down the hallway, beckoning Aurora to follow. "Come along, Aurora. We have a few more errands to run before it gets late." Aurora turned back to Rosalie. "Nice talking to you!" With that, she turned back and ran to catch up with her Dad, looking back, and giving a quick wave, before disappearing round a corner.
She met Rosalie again during a couple of their subsequent visits, and had another couple of short conversations on each visit. It was on one of these that she found out that Rosalie had turned 15, and debuted since they'd last met. Astor was to debut in the next few weeks, being 16, but she was meant to wait until her 16th birthday to debut at court. This did not suit her at all, particularly if Rosalie, the only person outside of Urvon that she knew, had already debuted. So she pushed to debut early, as soon as possible, and after a few months, her parents gave in.
Aurora debuted in a lovely maroon gown that was covered in intricate silver embroidery, with her sole piece of jewelry being a delicate necklace made of real silver, from which hung a silver pendant inset with a beautiful ruby. Her first thought as she entered the ballroom was that there were so many people. She was unsure exactly where to start until she spied Rosalie conversing with a boy a few years older than her. She said she had a brother, didn't she? Aurora worked her way over to them, trying to avoid the urge to bounce excitedly around. As she approached, Rosalie caught her eye, turning to greet her with a smile. "Lady Aurora, it has been a while since I saw you; you're looking well! I love your dress."
Aurora smiled. "Lady Rosalie! It's great to see you too!" She took a moment to have a good look at what Rosalie was wearing. "And you look great too!"
Rosalie's maybe brother cleared his throat, getting Rosalie's attention. "Oh! This is my oaf of a brother, Renaud. I don't believe you've met… Renaud, this is Aurora Urvon." So he was her brother then, Aurora thought. Renaud bowed slightly.
"It's a pleasure, Lady Aurora."
Aurora curtsied in return. "The pleasure's mine, Lord Renaud." Then, she addressed both of them. "So, are you both looking forward to this evening?" She looked around. "This is so exciting. So many people! And it still looks like more people are turning up, even!"
"I always get excited before the ball begins." Rosalie lent forward slightly "I don't get as nervous as Renaud though, mostly just excited."
A slight frown appeared on Renaud face as he spoke to his sister. "You do not have to tell every person about that Rosalie."
"Oh, hush. Everyone thinks it's cute." With that, Rosalie dismissed her brother with a small hand motion, while turning to watch the crowd, pulling Aurora aside. "I'm so glad you found us." She continued. "It's nice to see a familiar face. I do hope everyone gets here soon. The dancing is my favorite part."
Aurora noticed that Renaud was still hanging around, though Rosalie had indicated he could go. She made a mental note to ask her about it, if and when Renaud had actually gone.
"Were you waiting for anyone for anyone in particular, or just hoping for things to get started so we can get through dinner to the dances? I must say, I'm very much looking forward to that part of the evening. The most, probably."
The rest of the evening passed as a blur of sound, faces, food and just general excitement on Aurora's part, and she was sad it had to finish. She would always look forward to the next ball. Rosalie was her first, and best, friend, but she soon made others as well, including Claire Valcier, who was only a bit older than her.
As Astor approached his 17th birthday, he was formally named Heir by their father. Aurora had made her opinions on the matter abundantly clear, but it hadn't made any difference. She just hoped that now that he was now formally, he might finally take the effort to learn how to be competent, somehow.
Now formally Heir, their father started to give Astor a more active role in running the House. Eventually, he began to let Astor help organize who went on different assignments. Astor started to use this as a way of getting back at Aurora. He would send Aurora on assignments when he knew she had other plans, or he'd give her the more annoying assignments. Whenever Aurora complained to her father about this, he just told her to take it up with her brother, as Astor was the person in charge of that. Astor would always protest innocence. It made it hard to tell if he was doing malevolently, or he was just incompetent. She assumed the later, though when it continued to happen, she couldn't be sure.
One such occasion was an event which a number of Houses of varying status (no Great House had a formal presence however). Aurora had organized to meet with Rosalie in the afternoon before Astor 'organized' her into heading Urvon's presence, and to reach out to some of the Houses about some trade deals. Aurora thought that she would probably be able to finish in time to meet up with Rosalie still, but sent a message to Rosalie anyway, saying that she might be a bit late. She took a group of people – other businessmen and the smoker bodyguard she usually made use of. For the most part, it was a bit dull. Some groundwork was laid in setting up some deals, with promises of further talks. Aurora hadn't needed to be there. While talking to the representative of the last House on her list to meet with, she received a message from Astor. Excusing herself from the conversation for a few moments, she read the message. For whatever reason, he needed her bodyguard back at the Urvon residence as soon as possible for something important. He had sent the message with a replacement. Handing the note to the bodyguard, she dismissed him, the new one taking his place. She tuned back to the representative, apologizing for the interruption, and continued on with the discussion. A couple of minutes later, the rep was interrupted by a messenger of his own. "I am sorry Lady Aurora, but I cannot continue to negotiate with cheats with allomancy." Aurora was surprised, though she didn't let it show. She had used a subtle touch of rioting when she felt it was necessary, but she had a smoker, and the rep obviously hadn't noticed anything. He'd have commented on it earlier if he had.
"I'm going to have to respectfully ask you to take that back." Aurora gave the man a hurt look. "There are ways of saying 'no deal, sorry', without making rude unfounded accusations."
"A Rioter isn't worthy of respect, especially if they're stupid enough to not use a Smoker." And with that, the rep hurried off. Aurora was confused. She motioned to her bodyguard to follow her off to the side. "You do have your copper cloud up, do you not?" The man looked at her, confused. "Mi'lady, I'm a Pewterarm, not a Smoker."
What…! She clenched her fists for a moment, before relaxing them again. She didn't want to let on what she was feeling. If he's not a Smoker… then anyone could have picked up her Rioting. Someone had, even. Aurora knew this was a bad situation. She called over one of her diplomats, and let them know that she needed to return home to deal with pressing matters.
On the carriage ride home, thoughts tumbled through her head. How had that happened? What did it mean? Would everyone find out about it? Probably. There were likely a number of Seekers in attendance. Who would they tell? Would they keep it to themselves? Would it become the latest gossip? What about her friends? Rosalie? Claire? No one's every going to sit down to negotiations with me… she realized. Worst of all, it was Astor's fault. Either this had been a setup, or he was so utterly incompetent that this was just a mistake. A phenomenal one. While he'd be reprimanded by their father, she was sure it would not change Astor's position as Heir. What if he did something like this as Lord Urvon? She shuddered at the thought… Maybe she'd need to work harder to prevent him becoming Lord Urvon. Tears begun to well up. No. I can't cry. Not yet. It wasn't the time for that. Instead, she focused on Astor, on her anger and frustration at everything he'd done, to keep the tears at bay.
Arriving home, she quickly found her brother, yelling and shouting at him, bringing the full force of her allomancy to bear against him. This was cut short when Rosalie appeared from a waiting room – she had come by a bit early and had elected to wait for a bit till Aurora returned. Realizing Rosalie had heard everything, and likely felt Aurora's alomancy, Aurora ran to her room to get away from everyone. A short time after, Rosalie came to find her, hoping to help cheer her up. The fact that Rosalie wasn't going to stop being her friend was an immense comforting to Aurora. Instead of going shopping like they had planned, Rosalie kept Aurora company till she had to head off to deal with her other commitments.
Aurora holed up for the next week, refusing to leave the house. She had received a letter from Claire a few days after being Outed, accusing her of being manipulative, using her allomancy to befriend her, telling her she wanted to not ever have anything to do with Aurora again. Aurora sent a reply, explaining she never used her alomancy on Claire, but she didn't receive any response back. Attempts at trying to meet her were met with excuses like 'Claire is too busy for visitors right now', or 'She's not in at the moment.' It had been what she'd feared. At least I've not lost Rosalie, she'd tell her self.
As she had thought, the consequences for Astor were minimal. Somehow the incident was Aurora's fault for not being careful with her allomancy. She couldn't believe it, but she wasn't surprised. Astor often managed to get away with pinning stuff on her. So, during her week of self-imposed exile, she started to set in motion plans. She talked with Trenton (one of her cousins) occasionally but didn't think much of him. He had always come across as a malcontent, wanting his parents, who ran one of the other branches of House Urvon, out of the way. She had never paid it much heed before, but now things were different. She questioned him about it, finding he'd been slowly consolidating his personal power, biding his time, waiting to see if Urvon pushed for ascension. He offered to help her out with her Astor problem. She didn't want something as extreme as what Trenton had planned for his parents, but she knew that she couldn't let Astor take over House Urvon, not if he was liable to do something as stupid as what he'd just done.
When the Perrault's ball came around, she managed to work up her confidence to attend. It'd be a smaller event than some, and after the Casuana ball, which she had heard had been quite the disaster, she hopefully didn't have to worry about people focusing discussion on her. Maybe Claire will be there, she wondered. Better yet, she had a new dress ready – it was maroon with silver embroidery, reminiscent of the dress she'd debuted in. Maybe things would be okay.
The carriage came to a halt. She climbed out and stormed into the Urvon residence. A doorman proffered a hand to take her coat. She didn't have time for that. "Tell my where my fool of a brother is, right now." The doorman's face went pale when he saw the look on her face. With a stutter, he replied, pointing her towards one of the corridors leading away from the entrance hall. Down the other side of the corridor, she caught sight of Astor. She exploded, no longer caring if there was anyone else around. Not that it mattered anymore anyway.
"WHAT IN THE DEEPNESS WERE YOU THINKING." Her shout startled Astor, and he quickly turned round. She stormed down the corridor towards him. "YOU SERIOUSLY THOUGHT THAT IT WOULD BE A GOOD IDEA TO REQUISITION MY SMOKER, REPLACING HIM WITH A PETWERARM, IN THE MIDDLE OF A NEGOTIATION?" Astor's face still wore a confused look. She flared her Zinc, making him feel the frustration and anger she was full of right now. She clenched her fists, took a deep breath, and slowly let it out. Calm down… she told herself. Astor opened his mouth to say something, but she started speaking again before he could get anything out. "I do not know if it's just another example of your sheer incompetence, or if you thought it was just a fun joke, but you have serious problems if you could ever think that Outing someone could be somehow be seen as a 'good' idea." Again she paused, closing her eyes. Her arms were still shaking with anger.
"Aurora, I…" She cut him off.
"No. You don't get to speak. Do you realise what you've done? What it'll mean? Do you think, once the news does the rounds, that anyone is ever going to sit down to a negotiation with me again? What about my friends? How do you think Rosalie, or Claire, is going to react when they find out?" She could feel tears coming, no longer willing to be supressed by her fury. "I hope you're…"
At that moment, Aurora heard a door behind her creak open.
"I'm so sorry to interrupt…" Aurora stopped listening to the rest, her face going white. Rosalie is here? Did I… I… Aurora hadn't focused her Rioting on anyone, just affect the general area for the last few minutes. All she had cared about was making Astor feel terrible. But if Rosalie had just been in the next room… She'd have heard everything. More importantly, she'd have felt everything. She quickly checked over her shoulder. Rosalie was standing in the doorway, with a confused but concerned look on her face. It was too much. Why didn't you tell me Astor… Aurora pushed past Astor, gripping her head. She ran to her room, no longer caring for dignity. She just needed to be alone.
Rolled Attributes
Social Skills: Superior
Combat Ability: Underdeveloped
Resources: Improved
Allomantic Skill: Maximum
Great work with the edits! Thanks for working so diligently.
Approved. That's one vote, good luck getting a second!
Everything seems to be in order here. Approved!


Row-hammer is hardware bug that can cause bit-flips in physical RAM. Mark Seaborn and Thomas Dullien were the first to exploit the DRAM row-hammer bug to gain kernel privileges. Kaveh Razavi et al. pushed the exploitation of row-hammer bugs to the next level. They abused an OS feature – memory de-duplication – to surgically flip bits in a controlled way. They succeeded in flipping bits in memory loaded sensitive files (e.g. authorized_keys) assuming they know their contents. By weakening RSA moduli in authorized_keys file, they were able to generate corresponding private keys and authenticate on a co-hosted victim VM.
In this post, we aim to showcase a different attack scenario. Instead of corrupting memory loaded files, we chose to corrupt the state of a running program. The libpam is an attractive target since it provides authentication mechanisms on widely deployed *nix systems.
By running an instance of a row-hammer attack on an attacker VM, we were able to successfully authenticate on an adjacent victim VM by corrupting the state of pam_unix.so module.
A DRAM chip consists of rows of cells that are periodically refreshed. When the CPU requests a read/write operation on a byte of memory, the data is first transferred to the row-buffer (discharging). After performing the requested operation, the content of the row-buffer is copied back to the original row (recharging). Frequent row activation (discharging and recharging) can cause disturbance errors that are reflected by a higher discharge rate on adjacent row's cells. This induces bit-flips in adjacent memory rows (victim rows) if they are not refreshed before they lose their charge.
The following code is sufficient to produce bit-flips. The code alternates the reading from two different memory rows (aggressor rows). This is required, otherwise we will always be served from the row-buffer and won't be able to activate a row repeatedly. The cflush instruction is also required to avoid being served from the CPU's cache.
Mark Seaborn and Thomas Dullien have noticed that the row-hammer effect is amplified on the victim row k if we "aggress" its neighbors (row k-1 and row k+1).
In a dual channel configuration, one can plug up to two memory modules. A memory module consists of memory chips that could be present in both side of the memory module. Each side is called rank. A memory chip is organized in banks and a bank is a matrix (columns X rows) of memory cells.
1 memory module per channel.
2 ranks per memory module.
8 memory chips per rank.
2^15 rows x 2^10 columns x 8 bits per bank.
When the CPU accesses one byte of memory, the memory controller is in charge of fulfilling the request. The physical address allows actually to select the channel, the memory module, the rank, the bank, the row and the column.
Bit 0-5: lower 6 bits of byte index within a row.
Bit 7-13: higher 7 bits of byte index within a row.
As noted in the following post, the memory controller does not address the chip and returns 8 bytes even if the CPU requests a single byte. The CPU uses the 3 LSB bits of the address to select the right bits.
In the rest of this post, we will assume the physical mapping presented above.
Row-hammering requires to select aggressor rows that belong to the same bank. Assuming, we know the underlying physical address mapping, how one can pick up a pair of addresses that map to the same bank but different rows?
The fact that we are attacking from a VM limits the available options. We cannot navigate through rows if we can't convert a virtual address into a physical address. Indeed, in our case, physical addresses from the VM point of view are simply offsets in QEMU's virtual address space. There is only one option left: Transparent Huge Pages (THP).
THP is a Linux feature where a kernel thread running in the background attempts to allocate huge pages of 2 MB. If we allocate a large buffer aligned on 2 MB boundary, then the kernel thread in the guest will try to back the buffer by huge pages. The same goes for QEMU's virtual memory in the host that will be backed too by huge pages after some amount of time. Thanks to THP, we can get 2 MB of contiguous physical memory, and since a huge page covers several rows, we can navigate through rows.
According to the previously presented physical address mapping, the row is addressed with the MSB bits (bits 18-33). This means that a huge page covers multiple rows: 8 exactly (2 * 2^20 / 2^18). Note, however, that addresses in a given row belong to different channels, banks and ranks.
For a given bank b_i, only three banks out 8 possible banks b_j satisfy the above condition.
One last interesting thing about row-hammering is the fact that is reproducible. Some memory cells are less well isolated than others. If we get a bit-flip in a victim row, then there is a high probability to reproduce that bit-flip by hammering again the neighbors rows.
Now that we know how to hammer, how to produce surgically bit-flips in memory? Well, we will rely on an OS feature: memory de-duplication.
Memory de-duplication is useful especially in virtual machine environment as it reduces significantly the memory footprint. On Linux, memory de-duplication is assured by KSM (Kernel-Same Page). KSM scans periodically the memory and merges anonymous pages – having the flag MADV_MERGEABLE (see madvise(2)) – that share the same content.
Hammer the memory from attacker VM.
Load target file in memory page vulnerable to a bit-flip.
Load target file in the victim VM.
Wait for KSM to merge the two pages.
The file in the victim VM should have been modified.
As noted by Razavi et al. in their paper, THP and KSM could have unexpected effect on row-hammering. THP merges normal 4 KB pages to form huge pages (2 MB) whereas KSM merges pages with same content. This could lead to situations where KSM breaks huge pages. To avoid this, we fill the top of each 4 KB pages with 8 random bytes.
Given a program P, how can we find all flippable bits in the program code that can change the outcome of P? Finding those bit flips manually by reverse engineering program P is tedious and time consuming.
We developed a PoC (flip-flop.py inside the following source tarball) with radare2 that leverages on timeless-debugging capabilities to catch those bits automatically. More precisely, we flip each bit of some target functions, run the desired functions, and check whether the flipped bit impacts the expected result of the targeted function.
pam_sm_authenticate [0x3440]: performs the task of authenticating the user.
_unix_blankpasswd [0x6130]: checks if the user does not have a blank password.
We found a total of 17 bit-flips that allowed us to authenticate with a blank or a wrong password.
Note that the script cannot recover from some crashes. More precisely, r2pipe fails to restore back the session after some fatal crashes. Unfortunately, r2pipe does not provide any mean to handle errors.
Allocate the available physical memory.
Add some entropy to memory pages to prevent KSM from breaking THP pages. We fill the top of every 4 KB page with 8 random bytes. The rest is filled with '\xff' to check for bit-flips in the direction 1 –> 0 (or with '\0' to check for bit-flips in the direction 0 –> 1).
We hammer each pair of aggressor rows in every huge page and check whether we have bit-flips in the victim row.
Load the pam_unix.so module in the victim page if the bit-flip matches one of the offset of Table 1.
Load the pam_unix.so module in the victim VM by attempting to log on.
Wait for KSM to merge the pages.
Hammer again the aggressor addressors that have produced the bit-flip in question. At this point, the pam_unix.so in the victim VM has been altered in memory.
The full exploit (pwnpam.c) is available here.
Please note that exploit is not 100% reliable and will fail if we can't find usable bit-flips.
The exploit is not fully automatic. At some point, we need to interact with the exploit to initiate row-hammering the pam_unix.so module after ensuring that the module has been loaded in the victim VM memory and its content has been merged with the one loaded in the attacker VM.
The exploit can be improved by exploiting a side-channel timing attack in KSM enabling us to detect whether two pages are shared or not. Writing to a duplicated pages triggers a page fault which in turn initiates a Copy-On-Write operation to unmerge the pages. We can observe a noticeable difference in time between writing to a duplicated page and writing to an unshared page.
The program modifies a single byte in every element of the first half of the buffer and measures the writing operation time.
According to the program output, we can clearly distinguish between duplicated and unshared pages based on the number of CPU cycles required to perform writing operations.
Note that we can also rely on the side channel to detect the version of the libpam running on the victim VM.
In our exploit, we assume that the attacker VM is started before the victim VM. This condition ensures that KSM will always back merged pages by the physical page controlled by the attacker. As noted in Kaveh Razavi's paper, this condition can be relaxed. The solution requires a deeper understanding on KSM internals.
Digression: KSM manages memory de-duplication by maintaining two red-black trees: the stable tree and the unstable tree. The former keeps track of shared pages whereas the latter stores the pages that are candidates for merging. KSM scans periodically pages and tries to merge them from the stable tree first. If it fails, it tries to find a match in the unstable tree. If it fails again, it stores the candidate page in the unstable tree and proceeds with the next page.
In our case, the merge is performed from the unstable tree and KSM selects the page that has registered first for merging. In other words, the VM that starts first wins the merge. To relax that condition, we can try to merge pages from the stable tree. All we have to do is to load twice the pam_unix.so module in the attacker VM memory and wait until KSM merges those copies. Later, when the pam_unix.so module is loaded in the victim VM (by attempting a faulty authentication), its content will be merged with the copy already present in the stable tree and controlled by the attacker.
Row-Hammer attacks are no longer considered as a myth. They are powerful and effective. In this blog post, we tried to provide the necessary tools to weaponize row-hammer attacks. We provide an exploit that allows one to gain access or elevate his privileges on a restricted co-hosted VM.
Disclaimer: Please note that this exploit is provided for testing and educational purposes only. We do not condone or encourage the exploitation and compromise of systems that you do not own personally.
I would like to thank Paul Fariello for reviewing and improving the code. Thanks to Pierre-Sylvain Desse for his insightful comments. Thanks also to the VuSec's researchers for their impressive work on row-hammering.
Kaveh Razavi, Ben Gras, Erik Bosman, Bart Preneel, Cristiano Giuffrida and Herbert Bos. Flip Feng Shui: Hammering a Needle in the Software Stack. In USENIX Security. 2016.
Antonio Barresi, Kaveh Razavi, Mathias Payer and Thomas R. Gross. CAIN: Silently Breaking ASLR in the Cloud. In USENIX Workshop on Offensive Technologies.
Mark Seaborn and Thomas Dullien. Exploiting the DRAM rowhammer bug to gain kernel privileges.
You said "Note that disabling KSM is sufficient to stop our exploit:", but then write 1 to "/sys/kernel/mm/ksm/run". According to https://www.kernel.org/doc/Documentation/vm/ksm.txt this will start KSM, not stop it 🙂 Genuine mistake, or … am I missing something?
Thanks Dmytro. I fixed it.
and the last question is how to load the pam_unix.so module in the victim page? Thank you very much.
Sorry for the delayed answer. The flip-flop script allows to search interesting bits to flip in a given binary. There is no need to run this script if you use the same version of the libpam as mine (see the hash in the blog post).
Pampam is a sample program that uses the libpam module to authenticate. I didn't provided this program.
The main program to use is the pwnpam tool. pwnpam tool takes as input the pam_unix.so module (the target) and a file containing offsets. Run './pwnpam -h' to get the list of arguments.
You have to run the pwnpam tool from the attacker VM. When you get a bit-flip that matches one in the offset file, start the victim VM, and try to authenticate with a wrong password. This will load the pam_unix.so module in the victim VM. Then wait some amount of time (few minutes) and hit any button on the attacker VM to run row-hammer again on the victim page. Now, try to authenticate again on the victim VM.
Hint: turn KSM on after starting the attacker VM.
Sir , could you please share the pampam program to me? That's useful to me to do the experment. Thank you very much!


text:
Gillian MacLaren Jacobs (19 de outubro de 1982) é uma atriz americana. Ela é conhecida por interpretar Britta Perry na série de comédia da NBC e do Yahoo! Screen, Community. Ela também apareceu nas séries Fringe, Law and Order: Criminal Intent, The Good Wife e Love (série de televisão), onde interpreta Mickey, bem como em filmes como Gardens of the Night (2008), The Box (2009), Seeking a Friend for the End of the World (2012), Bad Milo! (2013), Ibiza (2018) e I Used to Go Here (2020).

Biografia
Gillian MacLaren Jacobs nasceu em 19 de outubro de 1982, em Pittsburgh, Pensilvânia. Sua mãe, Martina Magenau Jacobs, trabalhava na Faculdade de Heinz na Carnegie Mellon University. Seu pai, William F. Jacobs Jr., era um banqueiro de investimentos.  Seu pai faleceu em 2013. Ela foi criada em Mount Lebanon, Pensilvânia. Sua família era proprietária do Jackson Koehler Águia Brewery, fundado em 1847 em Erie, Pensilvânia, onde seu avô, John Martin Magenau Jr., atuou como presidente e CEO até o encerramento das atividades em 1978.

Jacobs começou a estudar atuação com oito anos, assistindo e atuando na Pittsburgh Playhouse enquanto crescia. Depois de se formar na Mount Lebanon High School, em 2000, Jacobs mudou-se para Nova York para participar da Juilliard School, onde ela era membra do Grupo da Divisão de Drama 33. Graduou-se com um Bacharelado em Artes Cênicas em 2004.

Carreira

O primeiro papel de Jacobs foi como Adele Congreve na série de televisão The Book of Daniel . Embora ela tenha interpretado Kim no piloto de Traveller ,  O papel foi dado a Pascale Hutton quando a ABC adquiriu a série. Jacobs posteriormente fez aparições especiais em Fringe e Law & Order: Criminal Intent . Em 2006, ela estrelou em um Off-Off-Broadway produção de Chris Denham 's cagelove. Embora a reação geral da crítica à peça tenha sido negativa, Jacobs recebeu elogios em várias críticas. O New York Times aconselhou os leitores a "lembrar o nome de Gillian Jacobs, uma formidável graduada da Juilliard que tem o brilho de uma estrela em formação".

Jacobs apareceu em produções teatrais como The Fabulous Life of a Size Zero (2007), A Feminine Ending (2007),  e The Little Flower of East Orange (2008).  Em março de 2009, Jacobs se juntou ao elenco da série de comédia da NBC Community como Britta Perry , uma estudante que abandonou o ensino médio e pretende se tornar uma psicóloga. Seu trabalho no cinema inclui Blackbird (2007), Choke (2008), Gardens of the Night (2008), The Box (2009), Revenge for Jolly! (2012), Bad Milo! (2013),Walk of Shame (2014), The Lookalike (2014), Life Partners (2014), Hot Tub Time Machine 2 (2015), Visions (2015), Don't Think Twice (2016) e Brother Nature (2016).  Jacobs também forneceu a voz do personagem Sta'abi nos Nickelodeon série Monstros vs. Aliens . Community foi cancelado pela NBC em 9 de maio de 2014, e mais tarde naquele mês, foi relatado que Jacobs conseguiu um papel recorrente como Mimi-Rose Howard na quarta temporada da série Girls da HBO.

Em junho de 2014, o Yahoo! O Screen renovou Community para uma sexta temporada.  Foi anunciado em 16 de setembro de 2014 que Jacobs havia sido escalado para estrelar como Mickey na série de comédia original da Netflix , Love , que durou de 19 de fevereiro de 2016 a 9 de março de 2018.

Jacobs dirigiu o curta-metragem documental The Queen of Code de 2015 sobre a cientista da computação e contra-almirante da Marinha dos Estados Unidos Grace Hopper .  Em 2018, dirigiu Curated , um curta-metragem narrativo, como parte de uma série produzida pela TNT e pela Refinery29.

Em 2020, Jacobs estrelou a comédia I Used to Go Here, de Kris Rey.

Vida pessoal
Jacobs é abstêmia, tendo dito que, quando jovem, ela fez a escolha de nunca beber álcool ou usar drogas, depois de "ver pessoas em minha família lutando contra o vício".  Ela revelou que seu pai era um viciado e que ela ficou com medo de arruinar sua vida da mesma forma, um sentimento reforçado em sua juventude ao ler Go Ask Alice , um conto de advertência sobre um Viciado em drogas de 15 anos.

Filmografia

Filme

Televisão

Televisão

Web

Stage

Prêmios e nomeações

Atores dos Estados Unidos

redpajama_set_name: RedPajamaWikipedia


Correctional Nurse Self-Care: Do You Have Your Oxygen Mask On?
At one point in my career I was in an airplane for business more than I liked. At that time, I could have probably filled in for the flight attendant in making the required safety announcement. I wish I had been on a flight with the wacky attendant in this video. It might have been more enjoyable!
One direction you will always hear from the flight attendant is to "place the oxygen mask over your own nose and mouth first" before assisting others. Of course, it makes perfect sense that you can't be very helpful if you can't breathe yourself! Fire rescue workers must first gear up before entering a burning house to rescue others. Nurses are also in a helping profession yet we can be the worst at following the principles of self-care so we are of benefit to others.
Nurses, in general, are prone to personal, physical, and emotional stress due to the nature of the profession. Work stress and burn out among nurses has long been identified as hazards of the occupation often overlooked by practitioners themselves. Many environmental and role conditions contribute to work stress such as the long hours, physical labor, and inadequate staffing situations nurses often encounter. In addition, most nurses are in constant contact with human suffering and must maintain interpersonal work and patient relationships in the midst of an often turbulent environment. Added to this can be, in some organizational cultures, bullying and lateral violence among staff such as verbal aggression or incivility.
Correctional nurses contend with the added stressors of the correctional environment and patient population. Research into correctional officer stress has shed light on the occupational stressors of correctional nurses, as well. In particular, experts point to the continuing exposure to traumatic stressors in the correctional environment that creates an added burden to workers. This exposure includes actual and potential assault, witnessing and responding to inmate death, and the continual need to be hyper alert to physical harm and psychological manipulation. It is estimated that up to25% of those working in corrections meet criteria for a post traumatic stress disorder (PTSD) diagnosis.
Have you ever thought of creating a nursing care plan for yourself? Mental health nurse, Joan Lorenz, suggests this method for stressed nurses. By creating a self-care plan, you can use the familiar nursing diagnoses of our profession to your advantage. Here are some diagnoses to consider for your personal nursing care plan.
Lorenz rightly suggests that many nurses see caring for themselves as somehow selfish. This attitude definitely needs adjusting! Like a flight attendant instructs "place the oxygen mask on yourself first". A physically, mentally, and emotionally drained nurse is unable to meet the needs of patients and is unsafe in our risky environment. So, buckle yourself in to a self-care plan that keeps you at full capacity to do your job well!
Fellow nurse, Elizabeth Scala, over at Nursing from Within, is running an Art of Nursing program in May that can add a deep breath of fresh oxygen into your nursing career. Maybe this should be on your personal care plan.
How do you take care of yourself in the midst of work stress? Share your tips with our readers using the comments section of this post.
This entry was posted in Professional Practice and tagged Essentials of Correctional Nursing, Lorry Schoenly. Bookmark the permalink.
Great post, Lorry. I love the use of the video within the article to share this point again. It's so true- if we are running on empty, what do we have left to give? And thank you for the shout-out about the Art of Nursing 2.0; it's shaping up to be an exceptional event! If anyone has questions they can reach me at (410) 929-0081 or support (at) elizabethscala (dot) com.


These Halloween math activities were created to help students practice their math skills in a hands-on manner. Students not only get to see and feel their math, but they also get to eat it! Use any or all of the activities here to help prepare for Halloween as you help your students practice their math skills.
Bring in enough chocolate cupcakes for the entire class. They should not be frosted. You will also need chocolate frosting, chocolate sprinkles, plastic knives, white frosting, M&Ms and brown or dark red licorice strips.
Give each student a plastic knife, frosting of both kinds, chocolate sprinkles, 3 M&Ms (2 should be of the same color) and 4 strips of licorice.
Ask students to cover the top of the cupcake with chocolate frosting.
Help students to put two "dots" of white frosting on the top of the cupcake. These will be the whites of the spider's eyes.
Help students to place the 2 M&Ms that are the same color on the whites of the eyes. The leftover M&M can be placed on the cupcake for the nose.
Ask students to cut their licorice strips in half. They should now have 8 pieces of licorice.
Ask students to put half the licorice on one side of the cupcake and half on the other side. Help students to insert these into the cupcake so that they become the spider legs.
If you want to do more with fractions than simply using the licorice, hand out more M&Ms than you need for the project. Then, ask students to divide them into different fractions, such as 1/2 or 1/4.
Make "mouse bones" by dipping straight pretzels in white chocolate. Give each student a bag of mouse bones and have them weigh their bags on a scale. Use a poster board to graph the weight of each bag. Have students fill in their part of the graph as they weigh their bones.
To make this activity even more mathematical, ask students to estimate the weight and count of the bag before weighing it. Then, have students count the "mouse bones" and see how close they were!
This activity is a fun and easy way to practice grouping and fractions.
To do this activity you will need raisins, seeds, pretzels and a variety of candies or nuts that you choose so that there are ten different types of items. You will also need a plastic bag for each student and a large bowl. Mix all of the items together in a large bowl after giving each student a plastic bag. Have students come up to the bowl and give them a handful of the contents of the bowl, instructing them not to eat it yet.
Once the students are seated, have them divide the items into groups based on what they are. Every student should have at least 1 of each of the 10 different types of items from the bowl.
Now, have students separate the items by fractions. Keep track of the amount of items by writing them on the board.
Ask students to write down the totals for each item on a piece of paper. For instance, one student may have 10 pieces of candy corn, 12 pumpkin seeds and so on. Next, ask students to put 1/2 of a specific group in their bag. For instance, you might ask students to put 1/2 of their candy corn in the bag. Do this with each item until there is a bit of each item in the bags, then check over students work by comparing their papers to their bags.
Allow students to eat any left over items and take the bag of goods home with them!


Therein lies the rub. It's not that my story is special. In fact, my story is unremarkably un-special. I am just like many people out there who let the little nagging voice in their head silence their ability to communicate with those around them. This is what makes asking for help so hard. It's probably more alienating than anything anyone else could say or do. At least for me.
That gesture made me want to reach out and offer the same support to anyone who might need it. Please read the article if you suffer from chronic depression or know someone who does. And if you want someone to talk to, I am here.


text:
Henri Jozef Machiel Nouwen[pronunciation?] (January 24, 1932 – September 21, 1996) was a Dutch Catholic priest, professor, writer and theologian. His interests were rooted primarily in psychology, pastoral ministry, spirituality, social justice and community. Over the course of his life, Nouwen was heavily influenced by the work of Anton Boisen, Thomas Merton, Rembrandt, Vincent van Gogh, and Jean Vanier.
Portrait of Nouwen in the 1990s taken by Frank Hamilton
Henri Jozef Machiel Nouwen
(1932-01-24)January 24, 1932
Nijkerk, Netherlands
September 21, 1996(1996-09-21) (aged 64)
Hilversum, Netherlands
St. John's Cemetery Richmond Hill, Ontario, Canada
After nearly two decades of teaching at academic institutions including the University of Notre Dame, Yale Divinity School and Harvard Divinity School, Nouwen went on to work with individuals with intellectual and developmental disabilities at the L'Arche Daybreak community in Richmond Hill, Ontario.
1.2 Priesthood
1.3 L'Arche
1.5 Death and legacy
2 Writing
2.1 Themes
3 Public speaking
4 Prizes
6 Works about Nouwen
6.1 Books
6.2 Articles and essays
Major seminary in Rijsenburg
Henri Nouwen was born in Nijkerk, the Netherlands on January 24, 1932. He was the oldest of four children born to Laurent J. M. Nouwen and Maria Nouwen (née Ramselaar).[1] Nouwen's father was a tax lawyer and his mother worked as a bookkeeper for her family's business in Amersfoort.[2]: 16–17 His younger brother Paul Nouwen [nl] was a prominent Dutch businessman and his uncle Toon Ramselaar [nl] was a Roman Catholic priest in the Archdiocese of Utrecht and a co-founder of the Service International de Documentation Judéo-Chrétienne [it].[3] Nouwen studied at the Jesuit Aloysius College in The Hague before spending a year at the minor seminary in Apeldoorn. His year at the school was spent preparing for six years of study for the priesthood, consisting of training in philosophy and theology, at the major seminary in Rijsenburg.[2]: 23
PriesthoodEdit
Nouwen was ordained a Catholic priest for the Archdiocese of Utrecht on July 21, 1957, by Bernardus Alfrink at St. Catherine's Cathedral in Utrecht.[4][5]: 82 Eager to learn more about himself and the people he counseled, Nouwen requested permission from Alfrink to study psychology instead of theology. His request was granted and from 1957 to 1964 he studied at the Catholic University of Nijmegen.[6]: xvii In studying the fundamentals of clinical psychology, Nouwen struggled with the lack of interdisciplinary analysis.[7] He sought to use psychology as a means of exploring the human side of faith which he felt was being overlooked, from a pastoral standpoint, in broader theological discussions. During his studies at the university, he was greatly influenced by Han Fortmann, a Dutch psychologist of religion whose writing about action and contemplation in a busy world are mirrored in Nouwen's own work.[2]: 23f For his thesis work, Nouwen focused on Anton Boisen, an American minister credited with founding the clinical pastoral education movement. The thesis was not approved due to a lack of scientific analysis and clinical study. Rather than revising the work to obtain a doctorate, Nouwen completed his studies in 1964 by obtaining a doctorandus degree.[7]: 38–47
The Menninger Clock Tower
After receiving his doctorandus, Nouwen studied for two years as a Fellow in the Religion and Psychiatry Program at the Menninger Clinic in Topeka, Kansas, and was influenced by psychologist Gordon Allport.[7]: 45 [8] Nouwen completed his clinical pastoral training at the Topeka State Hospital[9] and graduated from the Menninger Foundation's training program in theology and psychiatric theory on June 19, 1965.[10] During his time at the Clinic he found he preferred direct contact with patients over the more scientific and medical analysis of certain branches of psychology. This prompted an examination of his professional practice in order to better integrate spiritual ministry with modern psychology.[6]: xvii–xix Over the course of this same period, Nouwen began to engage with social and political happenings, including the Civil Rights Movement. In 1965 he traveled to the Southern United States to participate in, and later publish an article about, the Selma to Montgomery marches.[2]: 23f
From 1966 to 1968 he was a visiting professor at the University of Notre Dame. From 1968 to 1970 he worked at the Amsterdam Joint Pastoral Institute and taught psychology and spirituality at the Catholic Theological University of Utrecht. In 1971 he received his doctorandus degree in theology.[citation needed]
Between 1971 and 1981 Nouwen was a professor of pastoral theology at Yale Divinity School, where he began to establish a broad readership of his work as a contributor to various publications including the National Catholic Reporter and as the author of several books based on personal experience.[11] During his time at Yale, Nouwen took several sabbaticals, some of which informed his writing. In 1976 he was a Fellow at the Collegeville Institute for Ecumenical and Cultural Research at Saint John's Abbey, Collegeville, Minnesota, and in 1978 he was scholar-in-residence at the Pontifical North American College in Rome.
While a professor at Yale Nouwen also spent several months at the Abbey of the Genesee. His first visit began on June 1, 1974, and lasted seven months. While there he kept a journal that was published as Genesee Diary: Report from a Trappist Monastery in 1976.[12]: 16 He returned again in 1979, after the death of his mother, which led to the publication of A Cry For Mercy: Prayers from the Genesee.[13] Though Nouwen concluded he was not suited for the trappist life, the Abbey of the Genesee and his relationship with then abbott John Eudes Bamberger continued to be of great importance to him.[12] The Abbey served as his home base for more than a year after he resigned from Yale[14] and it was where he chose to celebrate the 25th anniversary of his ordination as a priest on August 6, 1982.[15]
After leaving Yale in 1981, Nouwen took a six-month trip to South America visiting Bolivia and Peru.[16] Upon his return to the United States in 1983, Nouwen was appointed at the Harvard Divinity School as Professor of Divinity and Horace De Y. Lentz Lecturer. The half-time appointment allowed Nouwen to split his time between teaching at the Divinity School and working with a theological center in Latin America.[17] Nouwen taught at the school until his resignation in 1985.[18] In 1985 and 1986 he spent nine months with the L'Arche community in France.
L'ArcheEdit
Nouwen's spirituality was greatly influenced by his friendship with Jean Vanier. The two men met while Nouwen was teaching at Harvard.[5] Vanier sensed how lost Nouwen was feeling and invited him to visit Trosly-Breuil.[1]: 105 Nouwen visited Vanier at the French community, the first in the L'Arche network, twice before returning in 1985 for a nine-month residency.[19] The stay helped Nouwen find a purpose that had been missing. As Robert A. Jonas explains: "Henri had always wondered what a Eucharistically centered community would be like, and now he had found one at L'Arche."[20] : l
During Nouwen's time in France he traveled to Toronto, Ontario, to officiate at a wedding and sought permission to stay for a week at L'Arche Daybreak in Richmond Hill. While there a core member named Raymond was hit by a car and left in critical condition.[21] Nouwen provided spiritual guidance to the community and Raymond's family, ultimately helping to reconcile the community and the family, who partially blamed Daybreak for Raymond's injuries. Nouwen's intervention had such an impact that the Daybreak members asked him to serve as their pastor.[1][22] Nouwen accepted and moved in the fall of 1986 to L'Arche Daybreak, where he would spend the last ten years of his life.[6]
While at Daybreak Nouwen was paired with Adam Arnett, a core member at L'Arche Daybreak with profound developmental disabilities."It is I, not Adam, who gets the main benefit from our friendship," Nouwen insisted.[23] Nouwen wrote about his relationship with Arnett in a book entitled Adam: God's Beloved.[24]
SexualityEdit
Geysteren, NL memorial
Nouwen struggled with his sexuality, which may have contributed to his feelings of self-doubt.[7]: 80 [25] Although this struggle was known by those close to him, Nouwen never publicly identified as homosexual[26] despite acknowledging the matter in discussions with friends and alluding to a personal struggle in his private journals.[27] In his book The Return of the Prodigal Son, Nouwen describes a friendship that had him under a spell, did him no good and when it finally collapsed left him in a depressive mood and in search of self-esteem and acceptance by others. Biographer Michael Ford referenced these instances in the biography Wounded Prophet, which was published after Nouwen's death. Ford suggests that Nouwen only became fully comfortable with his sexual orientation in the last few years of his life, and that Nouwen's depression was caused, in part, by the conflict between his priestly vows of chastity and the sense of loneliness and longing for intimacy that he experienced.[5] "This took an enormous emotional, spiritual and physical toll on his life and may have contributed to his early death."[5] While his struggle to reconcile his priestly vows of chastity with his human desire for physical and emotional intimacy appears in his writings, there is no evidence that Nouwen ever broke his vow of celibacy.[25][26]
Death and legacyEdit
Nouwen died in the Netherlands on September 21, 1996, from a sudden heart attack, while en route to Russia to participate in a Dutch documentary about his book The Return of the Prodigal Son. Nouwen's first funeral Mass was held on September 24 at St. Catherine's Cathedral in Utrecht with a eulogy offered by Jean Vanier, after which Nouwen's body was flown to Canada for burial by the L'Arche Daybreak community. The second funeral Mass was held on September 28 at the Slovak Catholic Cathedral of the Transfiguration in Markham, Ontario, following a full-day wake at St. Mary Immaculate Catholic Church in Richmond Hill on September 27.[28] Nouwen was laid to rest in a pine coffin built in L'Arche Daybreak's The Woodery and colourfully painted by members of the community.[29] He is buried in St. John's Anglican Church Cemetery in Richmond Hill in keeping with his desire to be near the graves of other Daybreak community members.[30] There is also a memorial marker for Nouwen in Geysteren, NL at the grave site of his parents.
Prior to his death he entrusted Sue Mosteller with his estate, making her the literary executrix of his works. The founding of the Henri J.M. Nouwen Archives and Research Collection at the John M. Kelly Library, University of St. Michael's College, was the culmination of Mosteller's effort to centralize Nouwen's personal records. The work involved organizing his material at L'Arche Daybreak, which included personal correspondence, original manuscripts, and audio visual material, and negotiating with the Yale Divinity School Library for the release of records Nouwen had begun depositing there as a faculty member in 1975.[31][32]: 19 The Nouwen Archives opened in September 2000.[33]
He has an award named for him, the Henri Nouwen Leadership Award, given out by the American Association on Intellectual and Developmental Disabilities, Religion and Spirituality Division.[34] There is an endowed lectureship in Classical Christian Spirituality named after him at Drew University. There is also an elementary school named after him in Richmond Hill, Ontario.[35]
WritingEdit
"Terugkeer van de Verloren Zoon" by Rembrandt Harmenszoon van Rijn. Nouwen wrote a short book, The Return of the Prodigal Son, based on his contemplation of Rembrandt's painting of the same name.
Before his death Nouwen published 39 books and authored hundreds of articles.[32]: 9 His books have sold over 7 million copies worldwide and have been published in more than 30 languages.[32]: 3 In a magazine survey conducted by Christian Century in 2003 Nouwen's work was indicated as a first choice of authors for Catholic and mainline Protestant clergy.[36] His books include The Wounded Healer, In the Name of Jesus, Clowning in Rome, The Life of the Beloved and The Way of the Heart, along with what is recognized as one of his most popular books, The Return of the Prodigal Son.[37][38]
While visiting the L'Arche Trosly-Breuil community in France, he saw a poster of Rembrandt's painting The Return of the Prodigal Son that made a deep impression on him. He decided to see the painting personally and traveled to Saint Petersburg (Leningrad at that time) to visit the Hermitage Museum where it is kept. This resulted in a several-day contemplation of the painting, which prompted him to write a book of the same name. The Return of the Prodigal Son was ranked number 66 on a list of 100 best Christian books compiled by the Church Times in 2014.[39]
ThemesEdit
Nouwen was known to suffer from loneliness and a need for interpersonal connection,[40] which he wrote about openly.[33] His popularity as a spiritual guide has been linked to his capacity to describe his personal struggles in a relatable manner.[41]: 1 He credited his approach to an interest in the daily life of people and his own journey with Christian life:
I wanted to know how we could integrate the life of Christ in our daily concerns. I was always trying to articulate what I was dealing with. I thought that if it was very deep, it might also be something other people were struggling with. It was based on the idea that what is most personal might be the more universal.[42]
One of Nouwen's major ongoing themes involved his struggle reconciling his depression with his Christian faith. His most famous work on this topic is the Inner Voice of Love, his diary from December 1987 to June 1988 during one of his most serious bouts with clinical depression.[citation needed] Nouwen also explored this theme in Return of the Prodigal Son, describing love and forgiveness as unconditional. In the book, he invites the reader to follow him in his personal return to the spiritual fountains and in a parallel meditation on all the characters of the parable, their rendering by Rembrandt, and the painter's personal life.
Nouwen also wrote several essays on the necessity of peacemaking. He used God's Love as a justification for the preservation of life, as well as for his opposition to both the ongoing Cold War and the intervention of the United States in Vietnam. This was of a piece with his conviction of the oneness of all peoples under God:
To pray, that is, to listen to the voice of the One who calls us the "beloved", is to learn that that voice excludes no one. Where I dwell, God dwells with me and where God dwells with me I find all my sisters and brothers. And so intimacy with God and solidarity with all people are two aspects of dwelling in the present moment that can never be separated.[43]
Public speakingEdit
Nouwen was a frequent public speaker. In addition to his teaching responsibilities, he traveled extensively leading retreats and preaching. With a distinct accent and animated speaking style, Nouwen was known for his engaging and expressive style of communication. The experience of seeing him preach has been compared to being at the theater or seeing a musical conductor at work.[5]: 31 It was not uncommon for Nouwen to enthusiastically jump around or wave his arms and hands during speaking events and classroom lectures.[1]: 80 [6]: xxiv Bob Massie describes the experience of watching Nouwen speak in Befriending Life (2001): "His squeezing, tugging gestures made it look like he was striving to milk meaning directly out of the air. He would point his fingers down and rotate his wrists as though trying to stir a separate little pot with each digit."[44]
Nouwen appealed to many audiences, including Anglicans and evangelicals because of his Jesus-centered spirituality. In 1992 he was invited by Robert H. Schuller to preach on Hour of Power at the Crystal Cathedral in Garden Grove, California. Nouwen appeared over three consecutive Sundays and preached on the topic of belovedness. Recordings of his appearance were later used by Schuller as a model for preaching when instructing new ministers.[5]
PrizesEdit
Christopher Award (1984) for Gracias![45]
Thomas Merton Award (1985)
Ronald McDonald House Charities Award of Excellence (1996)[46]
Emmausprisen (2002)[47]
Main article: Henri Nouwen bibliography
Works about NouwenEdit
BooksEdit
Bengtson, Jonathan; Earnshaw, Gabrielle, eds. (2006). Turning the wheel : Henri Nouwen and our search for God. Maryknoll, NY.: Orbis Books. OCLC 123485283.
Beumer, Jurjen (1997). Henri Nouwen : a restless seeking for God. New York: Crossroad Pub. Co. ISBN 9780824517687. OCLC 36573627.
de Vinck, Christopher, ed. (1999). Nouwen then : personal reflections on Henri. Grand Rapids, Mich.: Zondervan. ISBN 9780310224624.
Ford, Michael (1999). Wounded Prophet : A Portrait of Henri J.M. Nouwen. New York: Doubleday. ISBN 9780385493727.
Hernanez, Wil (2006). Henri Nouwen: A Spirituality of Imperfection. New York: Paulist Press. ISBN 9780809144341. OCLC 70673257.
Higgins, Michael W.; Burns, Kevin (2012). Genius Born of Anguish: The Life & Legacy of Henri Nouwen. Toronto, Ontario, Canada: Novalis. ISBN 9780809147854.
LaNoue, Deirdre (2000). The Spiritual Legacy of Henri Nouwen (1st ed.). New York: Continuum. ISBN 9780826412836. OCLC 44469051.
O'Laughlin, Michael (2004). God's Beloved : A Spiritual Biography of Henri Nouwen (1st ed.). Maryknoll, N.Y.: Orbis Books. ISBN 9781570755613. OCLC 54806408.
O'Laughlin, Michael (2005). Henri Nouwen: His Life and Vision (1st ed.). Maryknoll, N.Y.: Orbis Books. ISBN 9781570758225. OCLC 60705527.
Porter, Beth (ed.); Susan M.S Brown; Philip Coulter (June 26, 2001). Befriending Life: Encounters with Henri Nouwen. Doubleday. ISBN 978-0-385-50202-3. CS1 maint: extra text: authors list (link)
Twomey, Gerald S.; Pomerleau, Claude, eds. (2006). Remembering Henri : the life and legacy of Henri Nouwen. Maryknoll, NY.: Orbis Books. OCLC 68220900.
Articles and essaysEdit
Callahan, Annice (1992). "Prophet of conversion / Henri Nouwen (1932- )". Spiritual guides for today : Evelyn Underhill, Dorothy Day, Karl Rahner, Simone Weil, Thomas Merton, Henri Nouwen. New York: Crossroad. pp. 176. ISBN 9780824511098.
Smith III, James D. (2006). "Christian spirituality envisioned : a pastoral appreciation of Ernst Kitzinger, Margaret Miles, and Henri Nouwen (Harvard, 1976-85)". In Richard Valantasis; Deborah J. Haynes; James D. Smith III; et al. (eds.). The subjective eye : essays in culture, religion, and gender in honor of Margaret R. Miles. Pickwick Publications. OCLC 70277239.
Trenn, Thaddeus J. (September 2006). "Science and the Mystery of the Human Person" (PDF). Journal of the American Scientific Affiliation. 58 (3): 216–224.
^ a b c d O'Laughlin, Michael (2005). Henri Nouwen: His Life and Vision (1st ed.). Maryknoll, NY: Orbis Books. ISBN 9781570758225. OCLC 60705527.
^ a b c d Beumer, Jurjen (1997). Henri Nouwen : a restless seeking for God. New York: Crossroad Pub. Co. ISBN 9780824517687. OCLC 36573627.
^ Wahle, Hedwig (1997). "Some known and unknown Pioneers of Continental Europe". SIDIC. Rome: Service International de Documentation Judéo-Chrétienne. Retrieved February 9, 2015.
^ "Ordination certificate" (July 21, 1957) [textual record]. Henri Nouwen fonds, Series: Nouwen's education records and study notes - School certificates - Diplomas, Box: 375, File: 364. Toronto, ON: The Henri J.M. Nouwen Archives and Research Collection, University of St. Michael's College.
^ a b c d e f Ford, Michael (1999). Wounded prophet : A Portrait of Henri J.M. Nouwen. New York: Doubleday. ISBN 9780385493727.
^ a b c d Jonas, Robert A., ed. (2009). The Essential Henri Nouwen. Boston ; London: Shambhala. ISBN 9781590306642.
^ a b c d O'Laughlin, Michael (2004). God's Beloved : A Spiritual Biography of Henri Nouwen (1st ed.). Maryknoll, N.Y.: Orbis Books. ISBN 9781570755613. OCLC 54806408.
^ Genius Born of Anguish: Henri Nouwen Talk by official biographer Michael W. Higgins, Avila Carmelite Centre in Donnybrook, Dublin 4 on Thursday, January 17
^ "Completion of Clinical Pastoral Training certificate" (March 1965) [textual record]. Henri Nouwen fonds, Series: Nouwen's education records and study notes - School certificates - Diplomas, Box: 375, File: 364. Toronto, ON: The Henri J.M. Nouwen Archives and Research Collection, University of St. Michael's College.
^ "Graduate Training Program in Theology and Psychiatric Theory certificate" (June 19, 1965) [textual record]. Henri Nouwen fonds, Series: Nouwen's education records and study notes - School certificates - Diplomas, Box: 375, File: 364. Toronto, ON: The Henri J.M. Nouwen Archives and Research Collection, University of St. Michael's College.
^ Schaeffer, Pamela (October 4, 1996). "October 4, 1996". National Catholic Reporter. Retrieved September 16, 2015.
^ a b Genesee Diary: Report from a Trappist Monastery (1st ed.). Garden City, N.Y.: Doubleday. 1976. ISBN 9780385113687.
^ A Cry For Mercy: Prayers from the Genesee (1st ed.). Garden City, N.Y.: Doubleday. 1981. ISBN 9780385175074.
^ Durback, Robert (1989). Seeds of Hope : A Henri Nouwen Reader (1st ed.). Toronto ; New York: Bantam Books. OCLC 18462950.
^ "25th ordination anniversary invitation" (1982) [textual record]. Henri Nouwen fonds, Series: Calendar files, Box: 188, File: 889. Toronto, ON: The Henri J.M. Nouwen Archives and Research Collection, University of St. Michael's College.
^ Nouwen, Henri (1993). Gracias!: A Latin American Journal. Orbis Books. ISBN 0883448513.
^ "Dutch Theologian Nouwen To Teach at Divinity School". Harvard Gazette. Cambridge, Massachusetts: Harvard University. January 28, 1983. p. 1.
^ "Letter to friends announcing resignation" (July 6, 1985) [textual record]. Henri Nouwen fonds, Series: Teaching materials, Box: 284, File: 2271, pp. 1. Toronto, ON: The Henri J.M. Nouwen Archives and Research Collection, University of St. Michael's College.
^ Burback, Robert, ed. (December 29, 1997). "Henri Nouwen: The Person". Seeds of Hope: A Henri Nouwen Reader. Doubleday. ISBN 978-0-385-49049-8.
^ Jonas, Robert A., ed. (1998). Henri Nouwen: Writings. Maryknoll, N.Y.: Orbis Books. ISBN 9781570751974.
^ Mosteller, Sue (December 29, 1997). "Funeral Eulogy for Henri Nouwen". In Durback, Robert (ed.). Seeds of Hope: A Henri Nouwen Reader. Doubleday. ISBN 978-0-385-49049-8.
^ Egan, Joe (December 4, 1985). "Letter from Joe Egan". University of St. Michael's College Collections. The Henri J.M. Nouwen Archives and Research Collection. Retrieved January 5, 2015.
^ Philip Yancey, "Holy Inefficiency", Christianity Today, Vol. 40, No. 14, (9 December 1996): 80.
^ Nouwen, Henri J.M. (1997). Adam: God's Beloved (1st ed.). Maryknoll, N.Y.: Orbis Books. ISBN 9781570759949. OCLC 37432875.
^ a b Gibson, David (2004). The Coming Catholic Church: How the Faithful Are Shaping a New American Catholicism. HarperCollins. p. 191. ISBN 978-0-06-058720-8. Retrieved March 31, 2008.
^ a b McGinley, Dugan (2004). Acts of Faith, Acts of Love: Gay Catholic Autobiographies as Sacred Texts. Continuum International Publishing Group. pp. 185–186. ISBN 978-0-8264-1836-4. Retrieved March 31, 2008.
^ Elford, R. John (2003). The Foundation of Hope: Turning Dreams Into Reality. Liverpool University Press. p. 72. ISBN 978-0-85323-519-4. Retrieved March 31, 2008.
^ Dear, John (October 11, 1996). "'Sleep well,' friends tell Henri Nouwen". National Catholic Reporter. p. 13. Retrieved September 16, 2015.
^ Geisterfer, Michael R. (October 18, 1996). "A wounded healer goes home". Christian Courier. He was buried in a simple pine box. They made it in the L'Arche woodery during the week they waited for his body to be flown in from the Netherlands. The coffin was painted with colourful steams and flowers and a child-like depiction of Christ on the cross which would lie over Henri's heart when finally closed.
^ "Henri Nouwen's Gravesite". Henri Nouwen Society. Archived from the original on August 5, 2015. Retrieved August 5, 2015.
^ Black, Shannon (September 21, 2000). "Works of priest who inspired Hillary Clinton open to public". National Post. Archived from the original on September 25, 2015. Retrieved September 24, 2015.
^ a b c Earnshaw, Gabrielle (2011). The Henri J.M. Nouwen Archives and Research Collection. John M. Kelly Library, University of St. Michael's College.
^ a b McCarthy, Gerry. "Nouwen Archive reveals depth of his interest in people". National Catholic Reporter Online. National Catholic Reporter. Retrieved June 16, 2015.
^ "AAIDD". Archived from the original on January 11, 2014.
^ Richmond
^ Carroll, Jackson W. (August 23, 2003). "Pastors' Picks: What Preachers are Reading". Christian Century. 120 (17): 31. ISSN 0009-5281.
^ Walsh, Brendan (October 5, 1996). "Obituaries: The Rev Henri Nouwens". independent.co.uk/. The Independent. Retrieved July 20, 2015. These last years at Daybreak produced some of Nouwen's finest work, books like The Road to Daybreak (1988) and The Return of the Prodigal Son (1992).
^ "100 best Christian books". Church Times. 2014. Retrieved November 12, 2014.
^ "When we honestly ask ourselves which person in our lives means the most to us, we often find that it is those who, instead of giving advice, solutions, or cures, have chosen rather to share our pain and touch our wounds with a warm and tender hand". Ruby Quote. Retrieved January 18, 2018.
^ LaNoue, Deirdre (2000). The Spiritual Legacy of Henri Nouwen (1st ed.). New York: Continuum. ISBN 9780826412836. OCLC 44469051.
^ Coady, Mary Frances (November 23, 1986). "Nouwen finds rest at Daybreak". Catholic New Times. p. 3.
^ Nouwen, Henri J.M. (2012). Life is Advent: The Lord is Always Near. St. Louis: All Saints Press. p. 22.
^ Massie, Bob (June 26, 2001). "God's Restless Servant". In Porter, Beth; Susan M.S Brown; Philip Coulter (eds.). Befriending Life: Encounters with Henri Nouwen. Doubleday. p. 10. ISBN 978-0-385-50202-3.
^ The World Almanac and Book of Facts 1985. New York: Newspaper Enterprise Association, Inc. 1985. p. 415. ISBN 0-911818-71-5.
^ "Awards of Excellence Gala". Ronald McDonald House Charities. Retrieved June 24, 2015.
^ no:Emmausprisen
Wikiquote has quotations related to: Henri Nouwen
Works by or about Henri Nouwen in libraries (WorldCat catalog)
Henri Nouwen fonds at University of Toronto Archives
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Home » Hollywood
Kevin Spacey Posts Bizarre Christmas Video Following His #MeToo Cancelation
Todd Malm Dec 25, 2020 5:46 PM PST
Over the last three years, Kevin Spacey has made sure to post a nice Christmas tribute for his fans and followers despite the fact he was ostracized in the Hollywood community in late 2017 amid the beginning of the #MeToo movement.
As it was previously reported, Kevin came under fire from his peers following the public allegations made by Anthony Rapp, who says Kevin tried to seduce him when he was just 14-years-old. At the time, Kevin was 26.
Since then, the actor hasn't been nearly as active on his social media accounts and in the public sphere, with the exception of the occasional appearence and social media post. However, as it was noted above, he has posted Christmas messages every year.
Despite the strange nature of the videos, Spacey continues to make them annually. Earlier in the year, Hot New Hip Hop reported, Kevin came forward to empathize with the problems of regular people, saying how it has been a tough time for many around the world.
Spacey previously claimed that it was easy for him to understand how people felt. He claimed he understood what it was like to lose your job suddenly and be told you can't go back to doing what you have to do for a living.
You can see what Kevin had to say in his most recent YouTube video below:
According to Hot New Hip Hop, Spacey again explored themes of suffering and mental illness in his most recent video. In fact, the actor claims many people have reached out to him about suffering suicidal ideation, depression, and anxiety.
On the other hand, some commenters questioned Spacey, considering there now exists a conspiracy online about the death of a few of his accusers. Last year, one of Kevin's primary accusers reportedly committed suicide.
Moreover, others have asked why he continues to make videos in the style of Frank Underwood, despite the fact he was fired from the Netflix series, House Of Cards, back in 2017. Kevin hasn't acted in any major films ever since Anthony Rapp came forward three years ago.
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365 days ago there was a new addition brought into the online realm of real estate. After having worked within the downtown Mississauga condo market for a period of time, Ivan Ciraj had realized there was a lack of a single, unified and modern source for condominium information. Faced with this realization, the obvious solution was to create one! Bringing together facts, relevant information that both buyers, sellers and even other real estate agents now use, SquareOneLIFE was finally the information resource everyone was waiting for. The core concept behind the entire venture was to structure Square One condos organization based on lifestyle types, given that this seems to be the characteristic which influences a large portion of buyers. This is a unique feature that is currently only offered via this web portal. Going beyond just being an online resource, SquareOneLIFE brings complete, professional real estate services for people within the Greater Toronto area through the IVAN Real Estate brand. This combination of modern technology, free public information, and trusted services has formed a perfect real estate solution for today's modern population.
On March 4, 2014, the initial version of SquareOneLIFE was released to the public. The goal was to provide the most detailed resource for Square One Condos on the web alongside professional real estate services. One year later, that vision still remains strong with continuous additions and expansions constantly being implemented.
With the idea of providing a stream of news updates, articles and resources for the public, SquareOneLIFE started publishing regular posts on the site. The detailed overview of the massive Parkside Village development in downtown Mississauga was the first popular addition to the website that set the standard for future items.
The Platinum Belt concept did not directly apply to the Square One Condos market, but was a significant addition to the real estate theories applied by Ivan Ciraj. This designation of an amalgamation of varying luxury neighbourhoods brought in a new term to help with ease of definition. It brings a manner in which to describe and present one of the most expensive real estate regions in Canada.
About 6 months into the active service of SquareOneLIFE, after the busy spring/summer market was starting to wind down, an analytical observation was applied to the gathered data. Reviewing the results of user interaction and feedback received over this period, it was necessary to implement some changes. With the continued goal of optimizing delivery of resourceful real estate information and services, updates were made to the user interface of the site. Many features were streamlined and composed in such a manner that made the experience fluid and simple. This updated version is the product you are seeing today.
The ability to view actual listings on SquareOneLIFE had not been available up until this point. It was always an item that was on the list of features, but there was no feasible manner in which to integrate it with the original website version. After conducting the Version 2.0 launch, the listings feature was integrated a short while later allowing a seamless representation of available properties within the already popular condo lifestyle search ability. With this final touch, the core experience of the site was finally at the level that was originally intended from the outset.
The information and unique structure of the site was finally beginning to spread among the online world. On this date a very important milestone for any web venture was achieved, reaching the first page of Google Search Results for the most common keywords in this real estate market. This solidified SquareOneLIFE's footprint and established the final stamp of approval signalling the arrival of the ultimate downtown Mississauga condos resource. With internet prominence, the ability for people to access key condo information and professional services, easily and quickly had finally become a staple of this brand.
Today marks the first birthday of SquareOneLIFE, with many more to come in the future. Utilizing technology to empower knowledge amongst clients and the public while offering trusted real estate services brings a sense of great accomplishment. As time leads the brand forward, the mission to always improve and expand will stay the same. The launch of the IVAN Real Estate central brand site earlier this year is a testament to the commitment to excellence. Combining the research capability offered to you for free through this site and having high calibre selling, buying and leasing services just a click or call away completes the image of modern day real estate professionalism.


musicpiece-radioplay. The listener can constantly rearrange, record and re-influence the live mix together with the performers and suggest new and other spoken or musical accents, a different text passage or speak in other languages. The construction is therfore a living instrument to reaserch the sounding depts of the library. Visually we play with different axis, that shift the perpective leading always back to the listening. The books and the readers overlay, scores and players, as basic elements of the always changing composition.


From February 23 to March 2, 2014, we held a study tour under the theme of "Learn International Cooperation in the Philippines," with the focus on the country's poverty, gender problems, and international cooperation. We had publicized this tour mainly in Kitakyushu, eventually attracting 13 participants. Although they were all different in terms of age, gender, and occupation, we feel that they were able to learn a lot from the tour.
The following is a report written by Ms. Mayumi IWAO, one of the participants.
After arriving in the Philippines, we left Manila and headed to the PREDA Foundation, an NGO in Olongapo City. It took us three hours to get there by bus. Then, we rode a small bus called a jeepney, the popular public transportation in the country, and travelled to Home for Boys run by the foundation. The bumpy ride made me feel as if I had been riding a horse-drawn carriage.
Social workers from the PREDA Foundation help children get released from a prison and give them support and education at Home for Boys. Most of these children were victims of cruel treatment such as sexual exploitation, or abuse/neglect by their parents. They had no choice but to simply become street children and steal food or money in order to survive. They ended up in jail, where they were abused by other inmates since these places are not made for kids but for adults. We need to realize these children are not perpetrators but victims of distorted social structures.
After an orientation, the staff showed us some rooms where boys were actually taking support programs. We first visited the Yellow Room, whose walls were covered with soft material. In this room, the boys can freely express their feelings such as anger, sorrow, and pain?the emotions that they cannot show anywhere else?while punching and kicking the walls. I thought this practice would help them feel better and learn how to control their emotions. This sight put me into deep thoughts. These boys live together in this friendly and open facility. They exchange jokes and look just like real brothers. After an exchange party with the boys, they showed me lots of animals and vegetables they were looking after. I hope that there will be a bright future for these boys.
Next, we paid a visit to Home for Girls, another facility run by the foundation. We received warm welcome from the staff and girls under the care of the foundation, and watched a play adapted from these girls' grueling past experiences. I could not put into words what I felt then, and wondered if it would be really all right for these young girls to watch such a realistic play drawn from their horrific and painful experiences of becoming victims of abuse and human trafficking committed by their own parents and relatives. It must be unbearable for anyone to face such a past. All children should feel loved by their parents or people around them. However, here in Japan as well, many children do not feel loved by their abusive parents. This issue is not just limited to the Philippines but applies in most societies in the world. Receiving necessary support and programs provided by the PREDA Foundation, the boys and the girls become strong enough to squarely face their past and learn how to control their emotions. Then, they can look toward the future.
were going to stay overnight with Aeta families! It sounds so exciting, doesn't it? We arrived in the MAO Community in the afternoon and had a session about the MAO Community. Then, we introduced ourselves. I said, "Ako si Mayumi" in Tagalog. I should have learned a bit more of the Tagalog language. I had a chance to talk to some of the host families, and at this point, I did not know who would be my host family yet. I found a lovely girl. She was very shy at first, but she held my hand after a minute. Later on, I came to realize that she would be my host sister. Lucky me! Her name was Cecil, and she was three years old. There were another two little kids in my host family and they were all so cute.
At last, we were introduced to each family, and that was one of the most exciting moments in this trip. One of my host sisters Paula, also aged three, came to call me. The family told me to rest first in a bamboo bunk bed. But as soon as I left my bag there, I decided to have more communication with my family. Somehow, the kids were very curious about me and peeking at me from the lower bunk. And when I went downstairs, my host brother Edmond was preparing dinner. He was really a good cook. My host mother Lita showed me around the kitchen. She spoke her local language, and her two daughters Monette and Claudia explained what mother had said in English for me. I heard that most people did not speak English in the MAO Community, but I was lucky to have my two high school sisters who spoke English so well?actually they spoke much better than me! Then they took me outside to show their newborn puppies, garden, vegetable field, pigs, pets, and pump well. After that, we had a good chat over a cup of coffee, and enjoyed watching TV.
Although I did not understand any Tagalog on the TV shows, it was fun to watch it anyway. And it was a great feeling just being with my host family and their friends at home. Time was passing so slowly with such lovely people and I really enjoyed every moment of it. In Japan, people seem too busy to spend time with their families. I prefer how time passes in the Philippines to that in Japan. We had dinner prepared by my host brother Edmond, and everything was wonderful. We had rice, two kinds of chicken dishes, cooked vegetables, traditional Filipino soup, mango fruit and a glass of mango juice. Claudia told me that traditionally they eat with their hands instead of using a fork and spoon. I tried to do so, but it wasn't easy to pick up rice since Filipino rice wasn't as sticky as the Japanese one. The next morning, I tried to eat fried fish with my hands and did it very well, I suppose.
At 8 p.m., we gathered together at the center of the MAO Community and enjoyed a big party night. Although the community had electricity, it was pitch-dark outside as there was no neon lighting. We walked to the party venue with a flash light under a night sky full of twinkling stars. They showed us their traditional bamboo dance, and kids sang some songs for us. I was so impressed. In return, we sang the "Sukiyaki Song". These cultural exchanges truly strengthened our bonds.
On February 27th, we visited the SAFRUDI (Social Action Foundation for Rural and Urban Development, Inc.) and SAFFY (Social Action for Filipino Youth) for fair trade. We were lucky to meet some leaders of producers from different communities. These groups were established to eliminate one-sided exploitation of developing countries by advanced countries and facilitate fair trade.
The move first started in Europe in the 1960s, and is now expanding worldwide with the U.S., Australia, Canada and Japan as major advocates. Some organizations in Japan are earnestly engaged in promoting fair trade. After receiving an orientation, we visited a store called Mano Mano to see fair trade commodities actually marketed in advanced counties. I bought a lot of banana chips and stationery for souvenirs.
In the afternoon, we went to Miriam College. We attended a lecture on women's studies at WAGI (Women and Gender Institute) for three hours. The lecture was mainly about gender issues. Japan is far behind when it comes to the empowerment of women. I remember that every time the gender discrimination was mentioned, it was Japan that students cited as a bad example when I was an international student at the University of Wollongong, Australia. My Aussie classmates often said, "There are very few female politicians in Japan," "Female employment rate is low," "It is difficult for women to return to their full time jobs after marriage and childbirth," etc. And to my regret, that is very true!
The latest Global Gender Gap Index, a comprehensive measure of gender equality, places Japan at 105th whereas the Philippines at fifth, the highest ranking in Asia. Looking at the situation in terms of gender equality, I think Japan should learn a lot more from the Philippine society.
On February 28th, we visited a slum area in Navotas city, and were given an opportunity to sell food at a stall on the street. How lucky! We sampled some. It was sticky rice rolled in banana leaf. Wherever I went, children smiled at me and that made me quite happy.
I met so many friendly and nice people there, and I miss everything and everyone in the Philippines. I thank all the people I met during this study tour and would like to close this report by introducing what my Filipino friend said 23 years ago–of course, we have been friends ever since and were reunited during this study tour: "I remember Japan because of you." The Philippines means a lot to me because I have special friends there. I renewed my determination to keep myself engaged in this country.
Even though the study tour lasted only a week, I was able to obtain standard information on global social problems. It was a good opportunity for me to start thinking about international cooperation.
I was able to visit many places that I could not have done on a private tour. Also, I was able to observe the reality of the Philippines that I would have overlooked on an ordinary tour.
The tour gave me many opportunities to interact directly with local children and adults, making me feel the reality of the Philippines. I am happy that local people welcomed me as a close friend, rather than as just a sightseeing visitor from a rich country.


And, as we were saying from the day zero, it will always be a community-driven tool. Simply because a community of programmers working together is better than a single person working alone. No matter who this person is.
Build a foundation for plugins by exposing AST and adding additional hooks.