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Sorry! Didn't Mean to Kidnap You, Blame Luna and the TARDIS Part Three
Jesmalestiel Doctor Who, Harry Potter, Lunar Harmony Through Time and Space, Sorry! Didn't Mean to Kidnap You, Blame Luna and the TARDIS 0
This is Part Three! To start from the beginning, click here.
Disclaimer: David Tennant and Peter Capaldi used to write fanfiction, so maybe one day I can play the Doctor, but as it stands, I don't have any rights to Doctor Who. And the less we say about the people who actually own the rights to Harry Potter the better.
A/N: I haven't forgotten about this fic, I promise, it's just that my other series A Trio of Tricksters is my priority at the moment, because there is a lot more interest in that story and I write what the people want for the most part. But! I have a decent backlog for that series now, so maybe I might write more for this one? Who knows? I'm sorry to tease, friends. These updates will be sporadic, but they're coming, I promise. NOTE that there is now a prequel to both this fic and the others in the series called Plimpys and Printing Presses included in the series chronology. It's about Luna and her dad. Please check it out! Thanks to my beta, cyborg-goddess, for putting up with my mad schemes.
SCOTLAND, 1015
Hogwarts in the eleventh century wasn't what Luna was expecting. Not that she had been expecting anything per se, because when she woke up that morning it wasn't as though she thought to herself I'm going to Hogwarts in the eleventh century today, I wonder what shoes I should wear. That would have been silly. What she actually thought to herself was that she was planning on going to Hogsmeade and there was going to be rain, so she should make sure that Hermione had Luna's wellies packed in her beaded bag. Luna had been meaning to make one of her own for ages, but she kept getting distracted by the extradimensional figures that called her attention to other matters. Besides, given their close quarters and the minimal amount of time they spent apart, it was quite simple to just have Hermione be in charge of carrying the majority of their possessions for the time being.
As things turned out, Luna didn't end up needing her wellies. Luna didn't need most of the clothes that Hermione had set aside for her in the beaded bag because they would actually look quite out of place where, or rather, when they had ended up. Hogwarts in the eleventh century was a strange place, where the familiar had become quite, unfamiliar and as a consequence, the trio knew that as soon as Slytherin made the suggestion of sorting, that getting sorted into separate houses was not an option. They couldn't risk being separated when they were already out of the depth to such a degree. From a personal perspective, how well they would do with being separated from one another was also a serious question. The three of them had formed a level of codependency that was perhaps slightly unhealthy, but completely logical given what they had gone through. The war had been an incredibly traumatic experience, and the trio was in the unique position of having gone through some of the worst parts of it together.
In fairness to the eleventh century Hogwarts, their current Hogwarts was different from what it had been for them in years previous. One example was that all the 8th years had individual rooms, mostly as a privilege afforded because there were doubles of that year, so they were put in separate housing that was more individualized because it was meant for visitors, but as a trio the three of them just shared a room and even though it made McGonagall blush, she didn't try to stop them. They were adults and Harry had defeated Voldemort. No one would stop him even if he wanted to piss on Dumbledore's grave, which he didn't particularly feel like doing, despite everything that had happened.
(Hermione, though, much to everyone who knew's shock, had actually poured a vial of urine on the old man's grave upon realizing that he had set Harry up to sacrifice himself. She said that she would have pissed on it directly but didn't have the right equipment to do so comfortably and that while there were transfiguration work arounds those were for people seeking more permanent transitions and not revenge over meddling bastards.)
All the same, even though there were many changes to the Hogwarts they knew after the war, the differences had nothing on the differences to Hogwarts in the eleventh century. Hogwarts in the eleventh century was an odd place, because while it had some of the same features, the great hall, houses, etc, the way things were structured was completely different. For one thing, once they were sorted (all into Slytherin — it didn't fit them all exactly, but it's where the Doctor decided to set up camp so it's where the trio set themselves up in turn) they lived in a dorm with other Slytherins, but it wasn't one where they got separated by gender or by year. Rather, because they were apprentices of the Doctor, they lived in a suite with him. The students native to the timeline all had individual rooms as well, also in suites, but theirs were separated by gender and rough age boundaries, though it wasn't exactly by year as they knew it, because of the smaller class sizes and because the ages at which one attended Hogwarts had yet to be fully standardized.
Theirs wasn't a normal arrangement, but something that the Doctor had worked out with the founders when he had a meeting with them. The thing of it was, though, that he didn't really seem to do anything having to do with regular magic. The classes that he taught — runes — were unlike anything that any of the contemporary students or professors had ever seen before, and Hermione privately suspected that he was teaching them things that were against what was properly supposed to be known in this time period, but when she tried to question him about time paradoxes he simply waved her off and said that it was too early in her education about temporal mechanics to be worrying about little issues like that.
This infuriated her of course, but Harry was able to talk her down, and Luna was able to talk her down again once Harry's efforts had worn off. In the end, it was really a matter of the Doctor constantly avoiding Hermione and her questions because he couldn't stand to have her question him, and he constantly just evaded actually giving her a straight answer until she literally glued him to a chair with a sticking charm and talked his ear off for half an hour, ranting, before finally getting him to give her some answers.
Eventually he was rescued by a concerned Helga coming to look for them after not being able to find them when they didn't show up for dinner. There was a bit of confusion, actually, because she thought it was some kind of weird sex thing and had a lot of reprimands about how a student shouldn't be involved with their teacher in that way, and trying to explain the whole awkward situation eventually led her to believe that, actually, not only was there nothing sexual going on, but actually the Doctor was Hermione's uncle, and responsible for her general wellbeing, and the whole interrogation scene had been because Hermione wanted to know more about her dead parents because she thought that he might have a role in their deaths, which was a quite frankly preposterous assumption, but she wasn't really sure what else to say.
Needless to say, Harry thought that the entire thing was ridiculously hilarious, and could not hold in the slightest bit of laughter when he found out, giggling like a lunatic, and he had to be administered an anti-cheering charm just to gather his composure enough to be capable of proper speech. Luna, meanwhile, was as calm as ever on the surface, but had a twinkle in her eye as she accepted a galleon from Harry once he had calmed down enough to pay her dues from her correctly betting that it would be Helga who disrupted Hermione's routine.
S!DMtKYBLatT S!DMtKYBLatT S!DMtKYBLatT
It had been a week since Hermione's failed attempt to get answers from the Doctor, and three weeks total spent in the year 1015, when Harry finally managed to win his way into the full confidence of his head of house. He had been working steadily to befriend Salazar since he had realized their trip to the past would be an extensive one, because he wanted to know the person behind the myths and legends, wanted to know what could prompt someone to leave a monster in a school full of children.
As it happened, Harry simply couldn't imagine Salazar as leaving a monster in a school full of children. At least not one that was meant to harm said children. Salazar could be harsh, and was a strict instructor, one who brooked no nonsense in the classroom. But the founder was also kind, to all students, and never discriminated against anyone with an honest desire to learn. And Harry learned a great deal from the one whose house he once rejected. The two of them became close, bonding over how they had each of them lost their parents and come in to responsibility young — Salazar was decades younger than the other founders, joining with them because of sheer magical power and unique skill rather than experience. Both of them also felt quite out of place at Hogwarts — Harry because of his time travel, and Salazar for another reason.
"I haven't told anyone but Helga or Rowena yet," Salazar began hesitantly as the two of them settled down in their usual study spot in the currently deserted Slytherin common room. It was early in the morning on one of the free days, and so all of the other house members were most likely resting. "But there is something you should know."
"What is it?" Harry asked.
Salazar paused, hesitant, before pushing forward. "I'm planning on making a transition from being a wizard to a witch."
"Oh," Harry said, surprised. He hadn't realized that there were transsexuals[1] in the eleventh century.
"I'll be leaving Hogwarts — I can't stay here as Salazar Slytherin, and I don't think I could convincingly be anyone else around the people and magic that know me so well. I'm not sure where I'll go yet, but I know that staying here won't be an option much longer."
"Well, perhaps you could come with us?" Harry Potter had never been short on wild ideas. He had robbed a bank and escaped on a dragon. He had defeated a dark lord. Proposing that the founder of his alma mater join him and his girlfriends to travel in a time machine that was apparently also a spaceship didn't seem all that preposterous.
Before Salazar could say anything in response, however, there was a crash as Rowena Ravenclaw stumbled into their common room.
"Salazar! It's hatching!"
"Oh no. Tell me you didn't. No no no no no, you didn't," Hermione moaned, her head cradled in her hands.
"I just wanted to see what would happen!" the Doctor protested. Rowena looked on, somewhat guilty as Helga frowned at them, appearing increasingly disappointed.
" History is what is happening, history is what is happening," Luna hummed.
Meanwhile, Salazar was cradling a baby basilisk, freshly hatched. "Ah, little one. I shall create a space for you where you can't hurt anyone. And you will protect the school for us, won't you my sweet?" she cooed at the small snake, who hissed an assenting reply. Not that anyone but Harry understood them of course.
Rowena and Helga conferred together, while the Doctor, Harry, Hermione, and Luna began to speak to one another.
"Now, I've been down to the TARDIS, I'm still working on trying to fix the randomizer, just so that we can get you back to your proper time. I think that we're going to have to drain it of its juice, which means staying here for just a teensy bit longer."
"How much longer?" Hermione frowned. "It's already been three weeks."
"Well, just a bit more than that," the Doctor twisted his hands together. "Perhaps more like, three to six months?"
"Doctor!" Hermione shouted in outrage. "How dare you! Kidnap us! Trap us in the eleventh century! What kind of alien are you!?"
"Oi! I didn't mean to kidnap you, eh? Blame Luna and the TARDIS. And I'm a Time Lord, thank you."
"Time lord. What kind of species calls themselves lords?" Hermione scoffed.
"What kind of species calls themselves sapiens?" the Doctor shot back.
Hermione sniffed, but didn't actually have a proper response to this, so moved on. "And what about after these three to six months? Will we be able to go home?"
"Probably. I mean yes, of course, we will get you home. Obviously. Eventually. But there's a whole world out there, worlds. There's so much more than this one planet. Don't you want to see it? I know you Hermione, you've been soaking up everything you can about this time period, about the lives lived here. Don't you want to see more? Because there is so much more to learn and see and do about life beyond this place."
"And if there is so much more to 'learn and see and do' why are we going to be stuck in the eleventh century for three to six months?" Hermione retorted, though she was intrigued by the Doctor's offer. She couldn't deny that she was interested. She had always wanted to explore the world, and more than that she wondered what was beyond the stars. In their astronomy classes they had learned that there were energies that came to them from the stars themselves, and she had always wondered what made those star systems tick.
"There's something I need to do here. Well, some things. It's complicated. There are events in motion, things I haven't told you. There's a reason we came here, and it's not just to witness Hogwarts at its beginning, though that is an exciting bit, isn't it? Though I am curious about that basilisk, I'll need to talk to Salazar about studying it a bit further, I'd like to know more about such a beautiful creature…." the Doctor trailed off, clearly deep in thought, and Hermione shook her head, realizing that she probably wasn't going to get much more out of the time lord once he had started muttering about cross-speciation and how sentience born from magic differed from artificial intelligence.
Over the next two months the Doctor spent a great deal of time with Salazar and the basilisk, who had been named Jessamine. He still occasionally taught his runes classes, but what he taught was so esoteric and advanced that only a handful of Ravenclaws and Slytherins, and a lone Hufflepuff, even wanted to attend the lectures that were held at entirely random intervals, from holding some at dawn to holding others at midnight. He claimed that this was because certain languages were better invoked at certain times of day, but Harry and Hermione suspected he just had trouble keeping track of what time it was, and was too distracted with whatever his secret mission was to consistently remember he was supposed to be a teacher. Luna, if she had an opinion, didn't share it with them. She was, however, the reason that they were able to attend all of his classes, because she had an uncanny knowledge of where the Doctor was at virtually any time. If one wanted to find the Doctor, they really need only find Luna, and she could find him in heart beats.
It was coming up upon midwinter, the shortest and coldest day of the year, and they had been in the past for almost three months when the trio finally discovered what had been consuming the Doctor so completely. They had been visiting with Salazar and the basilisk in the Chamber of Secrets, explaining to her what their time was like, and trying again to convince her that she should ask the Doctor to come with them when they left the school to travel through time and space. They had just convinced her that she should approach the Doctor about it when the Doctor himself came into the chamber, scrambling through the mouth of the statue of Salazar's father, the image of whom she decided would make an excellent guard for Jessamine, as he had always nurtured his daughter's love of snakes before his untimely death at the hands of muggles intent on a witch burning.
"I found them! I finally found them!"
"Found who, Doctor?" Harry asked, puzzled.
"I knew there was a reason we were here. She told me, she said that she always takes me where I need to go, and so I had to find out, why did we need to be here? And I thought there was something fishy, and there was. It's the diadem!"
"What? You mean Rowena's diadem?" Salazar asked, bewildered.
"Yes! I knew there was something here, but there was a perception filter, and a strong one if it blocked me too. But they're here, and they want Rowena, and they're using the diadem, and we don't have very much time. And I'm wasting it by even bothering to tell you all so come on! I'll explain on the way!" The Doctor scrambled outside of the room again, and giving each other bewildered looks, the four of them bid Jessamine farewell and followed the Doctor.
"Doctor, what is going on?" Harry demanded, panting, as he caught up with the Doctor, running up the stairs of one of the passageways that led to the main area of the school. Hermione had called them pipes in their second year, but that was her muggleborn upbringing talking; these had never been used for sewage — magical people had magical ways of removing waste.
"There are these aliens, well, they're not aliens, they're humans, well, it depends on what you call human, anyway, they have this way of… converting humans to be like them. And Rowena is the brightest witch of the century. The advantage she could give them, if she was converted… they've been using the diadem to shape her mind, so that she will come to them willingly. We have to get it away from her. I just hope we aren't too late. I needed all of you, well, because I'm not really a proper wizard, am I? Rowena is powerful, and only young time lords can learn human magic. My magical pathways are too stagnated. I'm too old. It's going to take all of us, she is very possessive. I don't know how this is going to work. I'll come up with a plan. I always do."
The Doctor did come up with a half-decent plan, which completely fell apart when Rowena announced to them that her daughter, Helena, had stolen the diadem from her earlier that day. This was a prime opportunity for the trio, who had been keeping their knowledge secret for the sake of history, to share information with the Doctor that was directly relevant to the current conversation, and so, finding a secluded classroom, they laid out for him (and Salazar, who they decided there was no harm in telling since she already knew about their time traveling ways) all that they knew about the story of the Grey Lady and the Bloody Baron.
"Ah, well, that does complicate things a bit. You say the diadem gets left in a tree in Albania? No one finds it until this Tom Riddle, in your present day?" the Doctor asked Harry.
"That's what Helena's ghost told me. I see no reason why she would lie," Harry shrugged.
"I suppose then, all we have to do is take care of the cybermen themselves. With the diadem out of the way Rowena should return to her natural state, and once the cybermen are defeated, we can be on our way."
"Could I come with you?" Salazar asked.
The Doctor paused, looking at the four of them. "You've thought about this, talked about it." At their nods, the Doctor sighed. "Salazar, do you have children?"
Taken aback, Salazar started before saying: "I beg your pardon. Why is that relevant?"
"Your descendants are powerful, and your legacy looms throughout history. The Slytherin line is well known. If you don't have children, history will be forever changed. It's a fixed point," the Doctor explained.
Salazar's face turned scarlet, and the first impression was of embarrassment, but the Doctor belatedly realized it was anger. "You listen here Doctor. I don't give a damn about your history. That is my future and I decide what I want for myself and what I want my family to look like. You don't get to tell me what I have to do about my life, especially when you don't know a damn thing about my life!"
"Salazar, it's not that simple. You're an established figure and people the world over know your name. You don't get to decide who lives, who dies, and who tells your story! Wait, no, that's a Hamilton quote." The Doctor frowned. "But the point stands!" He continued "You have a place here."
"No I don't! I don't have a place anywhere! My family wants nothing to do with me! My wife rejected me when she found out that I — that I am not really a wizard. She said there was no space for two mothers in the lives of our sons and she kicked me out! Why do you think I ran away to start a school? But she'll never send our kids here, not while she knows I am a professor. I have to leave if I want my son and daughter to get a proper education. Don't you see, Doctor? I don't belong here. I don't belong anywhere. There is no place for witches who used to live as wizards in this time."
Seeing the angry yet hopeful expression on Salazar's face, the Doctor nodded, "OK, you can come with us. But no wandering off! And we still have to deal with these cybermen first. Come along to the TARDIS. We have to find their ship, and the unplottability matrix of the castle scrambles the locator fields."
"What's a TARDIS?" Salazar asked with a confused look on her face.
"How did you think I travelled?" The Doctor asked. "On a motorbike?"
"What's a motorbike?" Salazar asked.
"We don't have time for this," Hermione snapped. "Not if there are apparently not-human not-aliens trying to do some kind of weird conversion process that the Doctor refuses to explain."
"Hermione," Harry said reprovingly, "Give her a break, it's not Salazar's fault she doesn't —"
"I'm not talking about Salazar I'm talking about the overgrown manchild currently waxing poetic when we don't have time."
"You should always waste time when you don't have any," the Doctor scoffed. "But Hermione's right. Allons-y! Oh, look at me, falling into old habits all over the place."
[1] Harry is a boy from the 90s, and thus this is the terminology I predict he would use and the thought processes I presume he would have. That said, I recognize as the author that this is not the same language that we use in 2019. I highly recommend Transgender History by Susan Stryker by the way, as I find it an important historical text and also it was a good lens for me in terms of thinking about how people have viewed the trans experience throughout the past.
ALSO don't forget to check out my ficlet prequel Plimpys and Printing Presses it includes a plot twist that I think you'll find very interesting….
Plimpys and Printing Presses
A Trio of Tricksters: Eclipse the Past, Usurp the Future Chapter Nine: Alternative Perspectives The Original Trio of Tricksters Part One: I'd Like for You and I to Go Romancing


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June 14, 2017 (Cleveland, OH) – World Synergy today announced that is has joined the NetSuite Solution Provider Program. Becoming an Oracle NetSuite Partner allows World Synergy to launch a cloud ERP practice to meet the growing demand for cloud ERP among clients in a variety of industries, including manufacturing, distribution, healthcare, managed services, and financial services. The relationship grants World Synergy with the ability to distribute NetSuite's unified cloud business management software suite to existing customers, as well as to new businesses. Additionally, World Synergy will have the proper resources, training, and technology to provide implementation, support and customization services.
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I have used Tar Gel Plus and FSA for many years. Tar Gel is a standard additive on all my jobs but I tend to only add FSA on commercial projects and days with rain in the forecast. In my opinion, FSA works best with sunlight. If I have a day with overcast, I am not as confident with drying times. I am wondering if there are any contractors that have used Fass-Dri additive. There is a significant cost difference between the FSA and Fass Dri and I am wondering if the additional cost is worth the money. I am also a results contractor, as we all know spending a few extra dollars to be sure our sealer is dry by the time the rain falls can be priceless. I would also be interested in feedback regarding sun,no sun, warm compared to cool temperatures. Thanks in advance for your input.


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Mystery Science Theater 3000 Revival Crew Announces Livestream Preview Advance Screening & Releases Official Teaser (Video)
March 30, 2017 @ 3:26 pm By Samantha Hurst
With the highly anticipated Mystery Science Theater 3000 revival set to premiere April 14th on video streaming service, Netflix, the crew behind the Kickstarter-funded project announced an upcoming livestream preview event and released a teaser trailer.
As previously reported, Joel Hodgson, the creator of Mystery Science Theater 3000, launched a crowdfunding campaign on Kickstarter in 2015 with a mission to raise as much funding as possible so that he could to revive the series. Originally seeking $2 million, the initiative secured $5,764,229 from 48,270 backers. Hodgson notably stated:
"The Kickstarter was my idea. I'd been working with Shout Factory trying to get the rights to MST3K for the last five years, and we finally closed the deal three months ago. I just think it's really important to me that we start with the fans and talk to them, measure how interested they are and how much they care. If I had just done a traditional network deal and then talked to them, it didn't feel right to me. I didn't care whether it was 10 people or 100,000 people, I just wanted to know who they are, what they want, what their expectations are."
In a recent update, Hodgson shared that those who pledged for EXPERIMENT 25 or higher will be able to go to the livestream preview event. The preview screening of Experiment 1101 will be available to stream starting at 12:01 AM PT on April 9th.
Check out the teaser trailer below.
Have a crowdfunding offering you'd like to share? Submit an offering for consideration using our Submit a Tip form and we may share it on our site!
Kickstarter Alum "Mystery Science Theater 3000: The Return" Makes Netflix Debut
Netflix Picks Up Mystery Science Theater 3000 Revival
Kickstarter-Funded "Mystery Science Theater 3000" Reboot Receives Netflix Premiere Date
Kickstarter Funded "Mystery Science Theater 3000" Goes Into Production
Update: "Mystery Science Theater 3000" Hits Over $2.3M on Kickstarter; Creator Reveals the Inspiration Behind the Cult Classic Show
Update: "Mystery Science Theater 3000" Completes Kickstarter Funding Round; Secures Over $5.7M For First Season
Joel Hodgson Talks the Return of Cult-Classic "Mystery Science Theater 3000" Following Kickstarter Success
Counting Down to the Kickstarter-Funded Revival: Netflix Showcases 20 Classic Episodes of "Mystery Science Theater 3000"
Out of This World: Mystery Science Theater 3000 Scores Over $3M on Kickstarter
"Mystery Science Theater 3000" Nears $4M; Leaked Clip of Crow T Robot & Tom Servo's "Star Wars: The Force Awakens" Audition Surfaces (Video)
Joel Hodgson Reveals What's Next for "Mystery Science Theater 3000" Following Kickstarter Success
Joel Hodgson on "Mystery Science Theater 3000" Progress: "Good Cheese Takes Time" (Video)
"Mystery Science Theater 3000" Nears $4.5M on Kickstarter; Announces Hollywood Star Cameos
Joel Hodgson: "It's Time to See How 'Mystery Science Theater' Can Function in This World."
On Kickstarter, Mystery Science Theater 3000 Crowdfunding Campaign Fast Approaching $2M Goal
This entry was posted in Offerings and tagged kickstarter, mystery science theater 3000, netflix, scifi, TV. Bookmark the permalink.
U.S. Fintech Lendbuzz Secures $150 million in Debt & Equity Financing
trueDigital Plans CFTC Regulated Cryptocurrency Derivatives Exchange
OnDeck Canada Announces Small Business Partnership With Coast Capital Savings

redpajama_set_name: RedPajamaCommonCrawl


Christine Platt cares for Guatemalan baby in her recent internship.
Christine Platt, a BYU College of Nursing graduate student, examined a little Guatemalan boy in a make-shift examination room. BYU College of Nursing preceptor Susan Chasson consulted with Platt, and the two decided the boy needed an immediate surgery in Guatemala City.
After explaining to the boy's mother the seriousness of the illness, Platt and Chasson discovered the mother had no money for travel. She would need a week or two to save enough to make the trip. Platt, Chasson and the rest of their medical staff and support team pooled the equivalent of $20 from their own pockets to send the mother and her son to Guatemala City.
This was only one of Platt's many experiences while in Guatemala for 10 days with a group called Humanitize Expeditions.
Platt went to Guatemala as part of her FNP clinical internship experience and for humanitarian efforts. The lack of resources forced her and her team to be thrifty. Exam rooms were cinder block walls and bed linens. Platt used an old school desk as a chair while examining. The sight of such need overwhelmed and inspired her.
"They would line up for hours just waiting to receive help. I wish I could have done more," Platt said.
Platt had the opportunity to help train 11 midwives and treat/learn about different dermatological cases. "Luckily, I had purchased a new dermatology book that I had brought with me for reference and learning. I took pictures of lesions and rashes that I wanted to bring back and study more about," she said.
Visiting a developing country has made Platt appreciate her current situation.
Platt has since returned and will take her FNP Board Certification Exam on July 10th.
This entry was posted in College of Nursing News and tagged BYU College of Nursing, BYU CON, Guatemala, Poverty on July 8, 2014 by BYU Nursing.


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This past year, we've made quite a few custom cakes! Here are our top ten picks for you. Which one is your favourite?
#10. This custom Hello Kitty fondant cake brings out our inner child!
#9. "Shaken, not stirred." This custom James Bond fondant birthday cake was probably given to a Man of Mystery!
#8. Oo la la! This custom birthday cake brought out our inner fashionista.
#7. Audrey had a sweet birthday with this custom Minnie Mouse fondant cake!
#6. This fashionista got a custom birthday cake complete with a seamstress's tools!
#5. We're in love with this sugar flower birthday cake. Nichole is one lucky birthday girl!
#4. We made this cake for our favourite winery in Niagara – Rosewood Winery.
#3. This custom birthday cake is filled with Xenia's favourite things, including a Louis Vuitton bag!
#2. If Jose doesn't wanna taco bout it, his custom birthday cake says it all for him.
#1. This custom fondant piano cake was a surprise for one lucky birthday guy!


TORONTO — Three months later, Kyle Turris is still keeping tabs on his former team.
Every night, the Predators centre checks the box scores. Every morning, he looks at the standings to see just how far the Senators have fallen since he was dealt in a blockbuster three-way trade that sent Turris to Nashville and Matt Duchene from Colorado to Ottawa.
Even now, he can't believe it.
When the trade occurred on Nov. 5, the Senators were firmly entrenched in a playoff spot and looking very much like the team that had come within one goal of reaching the Stanley Cup final. But after back-to-back wins against Colorado in Sweden, Ottawa's season came to a sudden and unexpected halt. The Senators lost seven straight and dropped 10 of 14 games in December. Today, a team that won six of 14 games with Turris in the line-up has now won 12 of 52 without him.
While Ottawa has the second-worst record in the NHL, Nashville entered Wednesday night's game against the Toronto Maple Leafs with the second-best points percentage in the Western Conference.
You might think these two facts put a smile on Turris' face. Instead, as he looks towards his first return back to the city on Thursday where he spent the past six years, there's a feeling of sadness for the team that still occupies a place in his heart.
Turris didn't expect the Senators would be where they are now. Then again, he didn't expect he would be in Nashville when the season ended last year.
That quote seemed to strike a nerve with Senators fans, who are wondering if Senators captain Erik Karlsson will re-sign with Ottawa or be dealt as the team contemplates rebuilding a roster that is clearly not good enough to contend.
As for Turris, he's still getting used to a city that is nothing like Ottawa, as well as being on a team that after reaching the Cup final a year ago is considered a favourite versus an underdog.
"It's new," he said. "When I became a part of this team, I was really excited. They have such a good group and you see the success they had last year and the depth they have. It's really exciting to be a part of.
So far, Turris has been doing his part. Though his production has slowed since he scored 17 points in his first 17 games since the trade, he has been a main reason for Kevin Fiala's breakout year and, along with Ryan Johansen, has given Nashville a solid 1-2 punch down the middle.
For the Senators, this is nothing new. While Turris arrived to Ottawa in 2011 as a question mark after a couple of forgettable seasons in Arizona where he was leaning towards being a potential draft bust, he left as one of the team's top forwards. He twice led the Senators in goals and helped them qualify for the post-season in four of six years.
"He had some really good years there, so I'd like to think it's going to be positive for him," said P.K. Subban, who knows what Turris is going through having returned to Montreal for the first time a year ago after being shipped out to Nashville in a headline-grabbing trade.
Turris is hoping for the same.
Two days after Nashville's Kyle Turris makes his anticipated return to Ottawa, teammate P.K. Subban heads back to Montreal for the second time since being traded in 2016.
Even though Subban's been back already, he said it's always a big deal to be back in the city where he was drafted and spent the first seven years of his career.
The last time Subban was back in Montreal, the Canadiens were in the midst of a six-game winning streak and on pace to winning the Atlantic Division. Today, the team has the third-worst record in the Eastern Conference.
Not that Subban feels sorry for his former teammates.


FaceApp, a selfie-morphing app, today introduced portrait filters titled "Caucasian," "Black, "Asian," and "Indian." In an astonishingly inappropriate move, they do exactly what you think they do.
FaceApp has been, up to now, most notable for its features which make users smile, or wrinkly, or the opposite gender — and we were okay with that. The app has done some fairly amusing things, such as create cheery portraits from dour subjects at a Dutch Museum.
But having users change race is a little more thorny than any of those things. Given the history of using makeup to ape different races in an unflattering way, changing race in an app feels wrong.
Needless to say, Twitter was not amused.
Somehow I don't think that excuse is going to fly this time considering they've explicitly named each filter after the race it imitates.
Update 8/10: It appears the filters have been removed from the app. That was sure an … experience.


KALYUMET is an Indian term for the word welcome, and a warm welcome is in store for you when you visit Kalyumet this season.
Located just minutes from Cook Forest and the Clarion River, Kalyumet offers the area's finest family camping & cabin facilities. From the area's largest heated pool and new playground to our new bathhouse and free WiFi throughout the park, our facilities are second to none.
We have free cable TV with 48 channels at each of our RV sites. We also have 50 amp service available.
Whether you are planning to explore Cook Forest or spend a leisurely vacation with family or friends, we have a site for you.
Planning a visit to Cook Forest? Be sure to check out everything Kalyumet Camping & Cabins has to offer. From our huge heated pool with spray mushroom and miniature golf course to our nationally recognized activities, we are the place for family fun in Cook Forest. The kids will love our great playground, the fire truck rides, trackless train rides and all of our planned weekend events. Don't miss any of the fun. Make your reservations today!
Throughout the season we offer planned activities. Every weekend has a special theme. Click on the Event Tab above to see our full schedule.
Our opening day for the 2019 season is April 26, 2019.
Welcome to Kalyumet.com. We hope you enjoy exploring our site. We accept camping and cabin reservations up to one year in advance. Make your reservations now so you don't miss any of the fun!
It's Family Fun Fore Everyone!
See what Kalyumet Fore Fun has in store for you!


Game on, game on. This post has a whole heap of Skorne games with my growing Immortals collection, plus some silly Convergence experimentation.
On the painting side of things, I've just not been feeling my Retribution force. I love the color scheme when it's done, but getting the red tones right is laborious. So I decided to just dabble a little with yet another Warmachine faction: Convergence of Cyriss. Yeah, I know. I should focus on one faction (Skorne) or just stick with Retribution.
I started with an Inverter, as it seemed like the ubiquitous choice for both the game and practicing painting. After a first attempt that I greatly misliked, I moved to this scheme which I am much more pleased with.
I also finished up Father Lucant for my Convergence of Cyriss. I'm particularly pleased with how he turned out. I'm liking the ceramic-looking select plates, and the light blue of the robes isn't too off-putting (that's the bit I struggled with the most). I'm working on the glow effects, and the one on the top of his staff is the one that I'm most proud of so far.
I also painted up another unit of Immortals for my Skorne army. They're on the left, meeting the first unit I completed on the right.
I traveled during the start of March, so I was a bit slow on games at the start of this month. Managed to sneak a few in though, and then the floodgate opened as I got a bunch in all right in a row.
Started out with a Skorne vs. Skorne match-up against Kevin. He fielded Makeda1, while I tested out my first draft of a Zaal1 list. I survived a pretty good assassination attempt, and managed to get four Last Stand-buffed charging Immortals onto Makeda1 during feat turn. The boosts to hit were enough to connect, and despite transfers managed to knock her out. Her self-harm on her own feat turn helped a great deal. It was a very close match and a great learning experience about how Zaal1 runs (and how Exalted models trip all over each other if I'm not careful).
My initial attempt at Zaal1 hit the field again, against Ryan's… Skorne… using Makeda1. A little bit of deja vu, but different options change the battle considerably. The big object in the middle of the battlefield had two arches, but charging would have to be straight thru because of size and angles. That lead to a bit of round-robin, and Ryan's swordsmen started out of place and facing incorporeal solos which proved to be the definite edge I needed.
The game was the Crossroads of Courage Season 3 Week 3 scenario, with teleporting circles. There was a bonus for having your warcaster/warlock in them with an assassination, so I actually had to have Zaal1 go for it to seal the deal. The rest of the army killed Makeda's transfer targets, and he teleported to the ring. Casting Last Stand on myself meant that I needed to succeed or I'd lose my caster (for those unfamiliar: any model that attacks under Last Stand is destroyed at the end of the turn). Took a few swings with my puny weapon, but managed to finish her off.
My next game was against Andy's Mercenaries, led by Drake MacBain. I took Zaal1 again. This time I got into a bad situation on attrition, but was able to use incorporeal to my benefit even in the face of MacBain's ugly feat. Thanks to the Feat turn, the soul-loaded Kovass got the job done with assassination.
Following that, I faced Ryan's Venethrax list. And the exact opposite of what won me the game against Andy happened. I got into the spot where I was ahead on attrition that he took a chance on assassination and managed to kill Zaal1.
Still more Zaal1, this one against Charles' Circle Orboros army led by Grayle. This one was right down to the wire, but I managed to pull out the assassination victory. You know it's bad when you're counting on the Titan Cannoneer to hold one side against melee infantry.
Onward to the weekend, where I played… Zaal1 again. Heh. This time I faced off against Larry IV's Circle army, led by Kaya3. He wasn't ready for how destructive my Immortals can be with Last Stand, so it went my way pretty fast. I definitely want a re-match at some point when he knows my list a little better and has more experience with Kaya3.
Following that match, I faced Larry III's Skorne force in a grand Skorne-off. He had Makeda2 and Xerxis1 as options, and I was reasonably certain he'd be bringing Makeda2. Because neither list I brought had an answer. I decided to drop Hexy2, which wasn't a particularly good plan. It didn't help that I came up short on what could have been a more aggressive play. He definitely had the upper hand in the game, and finally finished off Hexy2. While I'm okay with Zaal1, I definitely need a pairing for him that isn't Hexy2.
Final game of this cycle, I broke down and put mostly unpainted Convergence of Cyriss onto the table. I have been trying to play as fully painted as possible, but in some discussions people said that I paint fast enough that I should just play what I want–and let my play drive my painting passion. So it was time for Lucant to strike out against foes.
I faced Ryan's Venethrax list with some heavy modifications from the last time I clashed. I got on a bad start from the beginning as I didn't have the ability to land things close enough to deny him points on the friendly flag. I was ahead in attrition, but time and score conspired to make me have to get too aggressive with Lucant. He rumbled up and did a great job against a sea of Warjacks (notching four total if my memory count is correct–two heavies and two bonejacks), but his urge to get up left him too easy prey for Venethrax who ended things with a charge of his own. I was honestly just glad to get a little table time with my Convergence. As I'm planning on doing some silly things with them going forward, and their induction system for Focus is a little wonky.


Coming off the NSO's New Year Concert of Mendelssohn's Midsummer Night's Dream, it seems very fitting to begin our new series about the symphonic poem with one of his works. In fact, that was the very impetus behind the entire series, really, or one of them.
I should say I've had strange classical music experiences. My exposure to and familiarity with the classical music repertoire has been very odd. I became very familiar with some rather obscure things early on, had some weird choices for first exposures to classical music, and also neglected some stapes of the repertoire until just recently.
For example, some of the first pieces of classical music I can remember owning or listening to were a mystery recording of Bruckner's ninth, by whom I have no idea. There was also Mahler's fifth with the London Symphony under Harold Farberman. There was Dvorak's ninth symphony and cello concerto (a bit more standard, maybe), and this, Mendelssohn's Hebrides overture, which I later realized was from the Celtic Album by the Boston Pops and Keith Lockhart. I shall not speak at length about it, but I have come to rather detest pops concerts. That's for a different discussion.
In any case, I distinctly recall the magical, captivating nature of this piece, almost like theme music from a film, as the opening credits rolled and we approach a huge mountain (or cave, maybe) from the ocean, and the story begins.
It was one of the few pieces of classical music at the time that could hold my attention, that gripped me, so now, coming back to it, my thoughts on it are far more sentimental than many others, but none of this came to mind until I listened to it again for the first time in many years. Proust, maybe, would be proud.
It was featured in a recent concert with the NSO, and I'd actually forgotten it was on the program, but a great chance to experience it live (and a wonderful, sumptuous performance it was).
Mendelssohn's first visit to England was in 1829, as a result of some invitations. He did well for himself there, largely influencing the English musical scene, composing commissions (like Elias) for patrons there, premiering works, etc. and then proceeded to Scotland, which produced the beginnings of his third symphony, but also the inspiration for this work.
I include this 'overture' as the first installment of the Symphonic Poem series because it's not meant to be an overture like many of Beethoven's or Mozart's overtures; it's not the introduction to a work, but rather a work itself, a standalone piece. While performances only of overtures in the concert hall as standalone works took place in the Romantic era, it seems Mendelssohn may have been the first, if not one of the earliest to compose a piece to be used in this manner, his Midsummer Night's Dream overture. See where it all comes together?
The overture consists of two primary themes; the opening notes of the overture state the theme Mendelssohn wrote while visiting the cave, and is played initially by the violas, cellos, and bassoons. This lyrical theme, suggestive of the power and stunning beauty of the cave, is intended to develop feelings of loneliness and solitude. The second theme, meanwhile, depicts movement at sea and "rolling waves".
While maybe that's an oversimplification, I do find the two major themes here quite gripping. The work, much like Brahms 4 on the same program that night, begins kind of suddenly, very in medias res, no introduction or fanfare or anything, just into the piece, and I feel like it would hold someone's attention well if listened to appropriately, that is, on a couch/bed, lights off, headphones and the mental image of approaching an awe-inspiring, mysterious cave from the ocean.
Although programme music, it does not tell a specific story and is not "about" anything; instead, the piece depicts a mood and "sets a scene", making it an early example of such musical tone poems.
I feel like the 'scene' and 'mood' are very easy to pick up on here; it's not some story about a libertine or a personal struggle or whatever, something far simpler and easier to convey, very universal, or subjective, or both.
Anyway, it's good, magical music, really Fantasia-quality stuff, if you wanted to think about it that way, but also a serious piece of music. This is like Mendelssohn's Instagram feed of his Scotland trip. He saw a cave, and sketched it (as above) and sent it to his sister.
It's one of the shortest works in our series for these next few months, but one of the most straightforward, easy-to-grasp symphonic poems, and a good example of the kind of music, a warm-up, let's say, but also in itself a very effective concert piece.
Bit of a gear-change from what we'd been doing for the past few months, but then again, that's why I chose it. See you next week.


Charles, Chaitanya, and I put together this quick video to showcase the four control modes available in the Cellbots app for Android. We used an iRobot Create, a Nexus One (with car dock), a Nexus S, and a Chrome OS Cr-48 notebook but only a single phone is required.
The app also works with LEGO MINDSTORMS, VEX Pro, and the custom Arduino cellbots and is available free in the Android Market for any Android 2.2 (Froyo) and up phone. After watching the video, download the app from the Market, or read more about how it works here, and of course download the source code if you want to modify it with more features and robot platforms.


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When Soichiro Honda established the Honda Technical Research Institute and later the Honda Motor Co. Ltd. after the 2nd world war, he was well aware of the responsibility of engineers and entrepreneurs for society. Since these early days Honda's philosophy is inseparable from the principle to be a company that "people and society want to exist". Researching new, possibly disruptive technologies for intelligent and more and more autonomous systems, at HRI we feel that it is our responsibility to consider how artificial intelligence might affect each one of us in our future lifes.
Cooperative Intelligence will maintain and enhance individual capabilities and create a new hybrid community of people and machines. If we create systems that are able to evolve and learn, their future behavior cannot be predicted anymore by the human designer. A freedom of behavioural choice that can be seen as a prerequisite for artificial intelligence needs an ethical framework that ensures that the new hybrid society will uphold basic human values. Researching the individual and social implications of the hybrid society has to be part of our activities. In order to establish machine ethics we need to share values for which we need to share experience instead of merely interacting with machines. Together with researchers from universities we want to contribute to the necessary public dialogue about the ethical considerations of these new technologies.
The approach of Cooperative Intelligence considers ethical Artificial Intelligence as a prerequisite for confidence and trust between human and machine. While most of the current research on ethics and technology concentrates on applying the ethical principle of preventing harm, at HRI-EU we focus on the aspects of fairness, mutual respect and explainability.
Integrating ethical principles into Artificial Intelligence reasoning, gives the autonomous machine a human- like value framework for Decision Making and behavior.
HRI-EU develops Privacy by Design concepts to preserve privacy for future personal data-driven Artificial Intelligence applications like assistance robotics. User interfaces which provide meaningful explanations of Artificial Intelligence behavior are conceptualised and tested in smart home environments. Autonomous vehicles are advanced by fairness considerations during selection and execution of behavior.
The user perceives these resulting systems to act more naturally and understandably – a human-centered Artificial Intelligence.
Applied Distributive Justice for Autonomous Driving
With Autonomous Vehicles (AVs), a new kind of traffic participant with Artificial Intelligence enters the shared public space. Taking ethical principles in any driving situation into consideration is highly relevant as every driving decision impacts the behavior option space of others. In our research, we propose to add a distributive justice model as framework for the AV's decision process. This enables the future vehicle to operate ethically towards other traffic participants.
The developed AV behavioral architecture understands itself as being part of a system with the other traffic participants. It systematically takes into account the perspective of all traffic participants – others and its own. When predicting the driving options, the AV also considers the impact on each other. Based on safety, utility and comfort needs, each behavior option gets a calculated cost assigned. The behavior planning module compares all available options and decides on an action according to a just distribution of the costs over the whole system.
The addition of a distributive justice model aims to make road usage for human drivers and autonomous vehicles in a shared space a just experience.
M. Dietrich and T. Weisswange, "Distributive Justice as an Ethical Principle for Autonomous Vehicle Behavior Beyond Hazard Scenarios", Ethics and Information Technology, 2019


I have a Toyota RAV4 2018 and when I connect Google maps with Bluetooth, it works fine when on Bluetooth audio. However, if I switch to fm, it no longer will make any sound. Is there anyway to fix this? (Setting on car that plays Bluetooth audio with fm or some other way the sound could come through the car on FM radio).
Welcome to Android Central! The nav voice has to come through the car stereo when it's set to Bluetooth as the audio source, so if you switch to FM, you won't hear the nav voice through the car system. In that case, you should change the Bluetooth option in the Google Maps navigation settings to turn off the voice over Bluetooth -- then the voice will play over the phone's speaker.


Take a look at the two graphs above. They are both mean temperature plots for Stykkisholmur, a small town in the west of Iceland.
The top one is the official Icelandic Met Office (IMO) plot, and it clearly shows a gradual upward trend since the early 19thC, interrupted by cold periods between 1860 and 1880, and again in the 1960's and 70's. (The latter are famed in Iceland as the "Sea Ice Years", when agriculture and fishing suffered so heavily that unemployment soared and the currency devalued by 50% – for a full history, check here.) Current temperatures are about the same as they were in the 1930's and 40's. (The graph only runs to 2007, but temperatures have dropped since then).
The IMO's narrative that appears with the graph states.
Now take a look at the second graph. This is from GHCN. Ignore the bits on the left and check the graphs on the right. The top, red, plot is the actual temperature record, which follows the IMO trend. The second, yellow plot, however, is the adjusted GHCN record, which is the one actually used for global temperature calculation by both GHCN and also GISS. The bottom graph shows the value of the adjustment, with blue indicating adjusting down up to 1964 and red being upwards adjustment since. The scale is a bit unclear, but the overall effect of the adjustment is to add a warming adjustment of 0.74C.
You might ask "where did the Sea Ice Years go?", and you would be right. GHCN have pretty much adjusted these out of existence. The GHCN algorithm has obviously mistaken the sharp fall in temperatures in 1965 as some sort of aberration caused by a change of location or equipment, and therefore wiped it from the record. However it has not made the same assumption about subsequent and equally sharp rises. The result is that temperatures since 1990 appear to be consistently higher than the 1930's and 40's, which, according to the IMO, simply is not the case.
Let's stop for a moment, and review what GHCN have to say about why they adjust.
Furthermore, as Trausti makes clear on his blog Iceland Weather, the IMO has calculated series with some appropriate adjustments for each individual station. In other words, if there have been changes in location or recording methods, they have adjusted for these on a specific basis already. There is no need for GHCN to make further adjustments.
So, back to GHCN. To isolate the inhomogeneities they talk about, they compare a station with other stations, via a "Pairwise Homogeneity Algorithm". Put simply, if Stykkisholmur shows a sudden drop in temperature while other nearby stations don't, it suggests that the "drop" is due to local, non-climatic factors, and is therefore adjusted back to the trend of other stations. But is there any evidence that this is the case in Iceland?
There are altogether six Icelandic stations listed by GHCN that are still current: Reykjavik,Vestmanneyja, Akureyri, Keflavik, Hofn and Stykkisholmur. The IMO have produced the following plot for Reykjavik, Akureyri and Sykkisholmur.
So not only are the cold periods seen at Stykkisholmur repeated at Reykjavik and Akureyri, they were actually more pronounced at the latter. And what do GHCN say?
Just as with Stykkisholmur, the temperature has been adjusted down prior to 1965 and/or up since. And not only in Reykjavik and Akureyri. Every single site in Iceland has been adjusted in the same fashion. (You might also notice that in some cases the very warm period around 1940, that the IMO refers to above, has been adjusted down).
The "Pairwise Algorithm" is claimed to isolate non-climatic changes by comparison with other stations. But in Iceland this clearly has not happened. Every single station exhibits the same trend and at every one the algorithm has adjusted it out. There are no stations that the algorithm could possibly have used to have come to the conclusions that it did.
It is impossible to come to any other conclusion than that the software is hopelessly flawed.
How significant is all this? GHCN state that the latest set of adjustments have added 0.13C/century to global land temperatures, and of course this is on top of adjustments arising from earlier versions. This is a quarter of the reported warming across the globe since 1980.
But if the adjustments made in Iceland are patently false, can there be any confidence that adjustments made elsewhere are not also fatally flawed?
BTW – check out Reykjavik. Not only has GHCN added a massive adjustment, but GISS have actually made matters worse by adding to it when supposedly adjusting for UHI – see here.
Thanks, Paul, for this valuable exposé.
It would interesting to know exactly what these American manipulators of observational data have to say about how they have handled the Iceland data. If I were in the IMO I would have quite a lot to say to them!
Prompted by your comment over at the Talkshop I took a quick look at the Iceland data, comparing the "corrected" GHCN v3.2 records against the unadjusted GHCN v2 records they're supposedly derived from. I found that overall the GHCN v3.2 corrections added hardly any warming at all, which I suspect might be the case over most of the NH. What they did do, however, was flatten out the 1940-80 cooling period and totally garbage up the individual records, which match each other closely in GHCN v2 but which are all over the map in v3.2. I could post some tinypics if you want.
Yes, that would be useful, Roger.
The adjustments don't particularly warm the present, so much as cool the past .
This is particularly apparent during the very warm period around 1940 for stations like Reykjavik. Also the whole period prior to 1965 is shifted downwards at all stations.
So 1939 is cooled by 0.60C and the present warmed by 0.14C. Total warming effect = 0.74C.
Here are plots of seven Icelandic records (Akureyri, Grimsey, Hofn Is., Teigarhorn, Reykjavik, Keflavik and Stykkisholmur) before and after GHCN "correction".(I didn't use the Vestmannaejya record because there's an obvious artificial discontinuity in it – the only one in any of the Icelandic records, incidentally.) The black line is a 5-year-smoothed average.
Just as they did in Australia NCDC has taken a set of perfectly good raw records that didn't need adjusting and trashed them. The adjustments didn't add any warming in this case, but they did flatten out the post-1940 cooling to the point where it's hardly there any more. I'm sure the people who can't simulate this cooling period on their climate models will be duly grateful.
It's worth noting that on the unadjusted version latest temps are below 1940. On the adjusted one, current ones are much higher.


You want a hot body? You know the rest | WERK Fan by Dirt Squirrel Co.
An order of fierce with a side of attitude. You better WERK.
Black fabric, multi-coloured layered font with black bamboo rib.
You want a hot body? You want a Bugatti? You know the rest. WERK it out with this fan wherever you are. This hand fan is made from solid bamboo for a commanding clack.


This winter has been the winter for extreme sloth-ing. Cozy hoodies, mismatched fuzzy socks, snuggling underneath my fluffy Rumpl blanket with some hot spiced cider in hand… The Outdoor Research Antora Hoody has been my favorite pick for those casual days.
As the days go by, I slowly descend more and more into sloth/slob-dom. Any jacket that feels like a fuzzy blanket is a winner in my book. With the Mountain Hardwear Monkey Woman Grid II jacket, I can get outside and be fuzzy and comfortable too.
The Mountain Hardwear Desna Grid Jacket is my new favorite lightweight fleece, dethroning the Arc'teryx Delta LT Jacket from best technical pajamas piece. Seriously, I loved the Delta LT, but I love this even more. Mountain Hardwear took things up a notch.
True Life: I hoard insulation. Synthetic, natural, fleece, down, Primaloft… you name it, I will probably come up with an excuse as to why I want it. When I saw the Triple Aught Design Valkyrie LT Hoodie at their warehouse sale for just over 50% off, I had to have it. I'd been lusting after it since one in the perfect size slipped out of my hands at last year's sale. This was my chance.


A pro bono art project for the Tabalugahaus planned in Rio de Janeiro – an aid project for children. Acquisition of new donations via an online auction of three photographs by artist Eva Hassmann. Accompanying media work and realization of a press conference.


Dani Treweek is our September contributor on EQUIP book club.
"I became a follower of Jesus sometime in late high school and now, a 'few' years later I am the Women's Ministry Coordinator at St Matthias, Centennial Park. All that means is that I get to spend my days with the women of St Matthias, reading God's Word with them, joining them in prayer and training and equipping them in their service of God and his people. What a privilege!
The other important things to know about me are: 1) I don't drink coffee (and never will!) 2) I persevered with LOST until the second last season and then gave up in despair 3) I've only just started enjoying mushrooms and 4) I'm a first-time mother to two baby budgies called Zeke and Zumba (Zeke might be the bossy one, but Zumba is the brains of the outfit!)."
Dani will be reviewing Singled Out by Christine Colon and Bonnie Field.
The tagline is 'Why celibacy must be reinvented in today's church'.
It's definitely worth buying and sharing with friends.
You can get it at a special price!


text:
Jothopogon niveicolor är en tvåvingeart som beskrevs av Pavel Lehr 1972. Jothopogon niveicolor ingår i släktet Jothopogon och familjen rovflugor. Inga underarter finns listade i Catalogue of Life.

Källor

Rovflugor
niveicolor

redpajama_set_name: RedPajamaWikipedia


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ASERF NEWS
Call for Research Applications
The Aesthetic Surgery Education and Research Foundation Elects Bruce Van Natta, MD as its New President
New ASERF Officers Serving on the Executive Committee Named
Garden Grove, CA (April 25, 2022) – The Aesthetic Surgery Education and Research Foundation (ASERF) announced the election of Bruce Van Natta, MD, a plastic surgeon practicing in Indianapolis, IN as its new President. Dr. Van Natta is an aesthetic plastic surgeon certified by the American Board of Plastic Surgery. ASERF is the philanthropic research and education arm of The Aesthetic Society. As President of ASERF, Dr. Van Natta plans to lead ASERF in its pursuit to advance aesthetic surgery through research and education.
Board certified by the American Board of Plastic Surgery, Dr. Bruce Van Natta has been a practicing plastic surgeon in Indianapolis for over 33 years. A graduate of DePauw University, he received his medical degree from Indiana University School of Medicine where he originally planned to become a cardiovascular surgeon. However, a chance encounter with a plastic surgeon faculty member led him to his calling. He went on to complete 5 years of general surgery residency with an additional 2.5 years in the specialty of plastic surgery.
"I am both honored and excited to help guide ASERF in its ongoing mission to promote cutting- edge advances in aesthetic medicine and surgery," said Dr. Van Natta, "ASERF has funded research that directly impacts our work as surgeons to optimize patient outcomes and promote safety. Research funded by ASERF investigating topics like Breast Implant Illness are answering critical questions for both surgeons and patients with peer-reviewed data. I encourage all Aesthetic Society members to give back to ASERF with donations to assure we can continue this important work."
Dr. Van Natta is a clinical assistant professor in the plastic surgery department of Indiana University Medical Center and travels nationwide to present on breast surgery and soft tissue support. A Fellow of the American College of Surgeons, Dr. Van Natta is a Medical Advisor for Sientra and was an active investigator in all clinical trials leading up to the re-release of silicone gel breast implants.
Dr. Van Natta has been a member of The Aesthetic Society since 1998 and has served on the ASERF Board of Directors and numerous committees including the FDA Breast Implant Hearing Task Force, Breast Implant ALCL Task Force, and many more.
Other newly named ASERF officers serving on the Executive Committee are as follows:
President-Elect: Caroline A. Glicksman, MD, MSJ
Dr. Glicksman is a board-certified plastic surgeon in New Jersey and has been in private practice in Sea Girt since 1991. She attended the University of Massachusetts in Amherst, Massachusetts, and in 1980 received a BS in microbiology and a BA in sociology. Dr. Glicksman went on to attend the State University of New York, Downstate Medical Center, receiving her MD in 1985. After completing her general surgery training at Mount Sinai Hospital in NYC, she completed her plastic surgery residency at New York Hospital-Cornell Medical Center and Memorial Sloan-Kettering Hospital in 1991. She then went on to complete an additional fellowship in cosmetic surgery at the prestigious Massachusetts General Hospital in Boston. In 2020, she received her Master's in Pharmaceutical and Medical Device Law from Seton Hall Law School.
Vice President: Onelio Garcia Jr., MD
Onelio Garcia Jr., MD, is a board-certified plastic surgeon who began a private practice in South Florida in 1985. He is considered a surgeon of distinction and has served the plastic surgery community for the past 30 years. Dr. Garcia also participates as part of the clinical faculty in the Division of Plastic Surgery at the University of Miami helping to train the residents in aesthetic surgery. He has published numerous articles on body contouring surgery, breast surgery and facial aesthetic surgery in the plastic surgery literature. In addition, he has authored eight chapters in body contouring and breast surgery in well-respected textbooks. He lectures frequently as invited faculty at national and international plastic surgery conferences.
Treasurer: Patricia A. McGuire, MD
Dr. McGuire is a board-certified plastic surgeon and a native St. Louisan. She attended the University of Missouri-Kansas City for undergraduate and medical school before doing a general surgery residency at Jewish Hospital- Washington University and plastic surgery at St. Louis University. Dr. McGuire specializes in breast surgery and body contouring. She lectures nationally and internationally on cosmetic breast surgery focusing on safety and has numerous publications in plastic surgery journals. Dr. McGuire is a principal investigator for the ASERF sponsored "Systemic Symptoms Biospecimen Analysis Study" the first prospective, blinded study, with control groups looking at symptoms that develop in women with implants.
Secretary: Gabriele C. Miotto, MD, MEd
Dr. Gabriele C. Miotto, MEd is an internationally recognized plastic surgeon specializing in aesthetic surgery, especially of the face, eyes, nose, and breast. She is also an expert injector of facial fillers, neuromodulators, and performs fat grafting injections for facial rejuvenation. She sees patients at her private practice in Atlanta – ME Plastic Surgery. Dr. Miotto is proudly Brazilian-American. She is fellowship-trained in aesthetic and oculoplastic (eyelid) surgery and certified by the Georgia Composite Medical Board as well as a member of the International Society of Aesthetic Plastic Surgery and Brazilian Society of Plastic Surgery. She is a "Membro Titular" of the Brazilian Society of Plastic Surgery since 2009. She is also certified by the National Board of Medical Examiners and earned a Masters' degree in Education with an emphasis on health profession education from the University of Illinois at Urbana-Champaign.
ASERF works diligently each year to select the best grant applications, as well as fund directed research projects that will most greatly impact the sub-specialty of aesthetic plastic surgery. If you would like to support the mission, you may donate here: http://www.aserf.org/donor-benefits/make-a-difference. ASERF is grateful to those who have given and hopes that with continued support we will be able to further our mission for years to come.
About ASERF:
The Aesthetic Surgery Education and Research Foundation (ASERF) is a 501(c)(3) not-for-profit charitable foundation. Its mission is to identify and pursue those issues relevant to advancing the safety and effectiveness of aesthetic medicine through independent, unbiased, directed research, and groundbreaking education. ASERF is supported exclusively by charitable donations and research revenues. For more information, visit www.aserf.org.
About The Aesthetic Society:
The Aesthetic Society is recognized as the world's leading organization devoted entirely to aesthetic plastic surgery and cosmetic medicine of the face and body. The Aesthetic Society is comprised of more than 2,200 Active Members in North America and internationally; Active Members are certified by the American Board of Plastic Surgery (USA) or by the Royal College of Physicians and Surgeons of Canada and have extensive training in the complete spectrum of surgical and non-surgical aesthetic procedures. International Active Members are certified by equivalent boards of their respective countries. All members worldwide adhere to a strict Code of Ethics and must meet stringent membership requirements. The Aesthetic Society is at the forefront of innovation in aesthetic plastic surgery and cosmetic medicine globally.
The Aesthetic Society
Copyright © 2009-2018 ASERF. 11262 Monarch St., Garden Grove, CA 92841-1441 P: 800-364-2147 F: 562-799-1098


text:
namespace tracer {

struct Vec3 {
  typedef const Vec3 &InParam;

  Vec3() noexcept {}

  constexpr Vec3(const float x, const float y, const float z) noexcept
      : x(x), y(y), z(z) {}

  float x, y, z;
};

inline Vec3 &operator+=(Vec3 &left, Vec3::InParam right) noexcept {
  left.x += right.x;
  left.y += right.y;
  left.z += right.z;
  return left;
}

inline constexpr Vec3 operator+(Vec3::InParam left,
                                Vec3::InParam right) noexcept {
  return Vec3{left.x + right.x, left.y + right.y, left.z + right.z};
}

inline constexpr Vec3 operator-(Vec3::InParam left,
                                Vec3::InParam right) noexcept {
  return Vec3{left.x - right.x, left.y - right.y, left.z - right.z};
}

inline constexpr Vec3 operator*(Vec3::InParam v, const float scale) noexcept {
  return Vec3{v.x * scale, v.y * scale, v.z * scale};
}

inline Vec3 &operator*=(Vec3 &v, const float scale) noexcept {
  v.x *= scale;
  v.y *= scale;
  v.z *= scale;
  return v;
}

inline constexpr float dot(Vec3::InParam left, Vec3::InParam right) noexcept {
  return left.x * right.x + left.y * right.y + left.z * right.z;
}

inline constexpr float length_squared(Vec3::InParam in) noexcept {
  return length_squared(in.x, in.y, in.z);
}

inline float length(Vec3::InParam in) noexcept {
  return length(in.x, in.y, in.z);
}

inline Vec3 normalised(Vec3::InParam in) noexcept {
  const float scale = 1.0f / length(in);
  return in * scale;
}

inline constexpr Vec3 lerp(Vec3::InParam from, Vec3::InParam to,
                           const float t) noexcept {
  return (from * (1.0f - t)) + (to * t);
}

} // namespace tracer

#endif // INCLUDE_VEC3_H

// Copyright 2014-2019 Angelos Evripiotis
//
// Licensed under the Apache License, Version 2.0 (the "License");
// you may not use this file except in compliance with the License.
// You may obtain a copy of the License at
//
// http://www.apache.org/licenses/LICENSE-2.0
//
// Unless required by applicable law or agreed to in writing, software
// distributed under the License is distributed on an "AS IS" BASIS,
// WITHOUT WARRANTIES OR CONDITIONS OF ANY KIND, either express or implied.
// See the License for the specific language governing permissions and
// limitations under the License.

redpajama_set_name: RedPajamaGithub


aw. wonderful story. we need more of these.
It's nice to have some humanity in the news. Nicknamed Boonrod? How about Lucky.
He jumped ship! Didn't want to become dinner. He just went from being immediate dinner, to dinner plans.


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Graduate Catalog [ARCHIVED CATALOG] Graduate Catalog [ARCHIVED CATALOG] Graduate Catalog [ARCHIVED. Hunter College of The City University of New York. Features of the Online Catalog. We want to make you aware of the features and tools for both current and. This application is intended for mobile devices and may not function as expected. Choose a catalog. Undergraduate Catalog ; Graduate Catalog.
Welcome to Hunter College's Online Catalog. Hunter College, located in the Upper East Side neighborhood of New York City and easily reached by public. Product Catalog. RESIDENTIAL AND COMMERCIAL IRRIGATION | Built on Innovation® stmaartencarrentalguide.com VOLUME 21 Dec The Hunter irrigation catalog is now available.
22 Aug Spirits Fall-Holiday Catalog, Author: Bounty Hunter Rare Wine & Spirits, Odette, has also been turning heads since it opened in Subject: Discovery of Africa Obv: Shield, ship, and palm tree Rev: Ship, map, and hunter Date Mintage F VF XF Unc BU — — — — Date Mintage. 2 May Started by LangyLang, May 02 AM . 5) The Bargain Hunter Catalogue is always updated with each Vend that goes up or down. 3 Hunter Getting Dressed after Bathing, however, predates Dou's painting by in a collection catalogue of the Swiss politician and writer François Tronchin.
Update for Windows Server (KB), Windows Server , Updates, 5/15/, n/a, MB Update for Windows Server R2 x The Hesiodic Catalogue of Women: Constructions and Reconstructions ( Cambridge, ) For a pdf of Professor Hunter's Inaugural Lecture please click here. Hunter Industries. By Golfdom staff| November 21, The Hunter irrigation catalog is now available online as a downloadable or interactive PDF. This is a list of video games published by Ubisoft. This is a dynamic list and may never be able , Assassin's Creed III: Liberation · PlayStation Vita. , Assassin's . , Dungeon Hunter: Alliance · PlayStation 3 · PlayStation Vita.


text:
The Cook and Bynum Fund
The fund:
(COBYX)
Richard P. Cook and J. Dowe Bynum, managers and founding partners.
The call:
Recently published research laments the fact that actively-managed funds have become steadily less active and more index-like over time.
The changing imperatives of the fund industry have led many managers to become mediocre by design. Their response is driven by the anxious desire for so-called "sticky" assets. The strategy is simple: design a product to minimize the risk that it will ever spectacularly trail its peer group. If you make your fund very much like its benchmark, you will never be a singular disaster and so investors (retirement plan investors, particularly) will never to motivated to find something better The fact that you never excel is irrelevant. The result is a legion of large, expensive, undistinguished funds who seek safety in the herd.
The Cook and Bynum Fund (COBYX) strikes me as the antithesis of those. Carefully constructed, tightly focused, and intentionally distinct. On Tuesday, March 5, we spoke with Richard Cook and Dowe Bynum in the first of three conversations with distinguished managers who defy that trend through their commitment to a singular discipline: buy only the best. For Richard and Dowe, that translates to a portfolio with only seven holdings and a 34% cash stake. Since inception (through early March, 2013), they managed to capture 83% of the market's gains with only 50% of its volatility; in the past twelve months, Morningstar estimates that they captured just 7% of the market's downside.
Among the highlights of the call for me:
The guys are willing to look stupid. There are times, as now, when they can't find stocks that meet their quality and valuation standards. The rule for such situations is simply: "When compelling opportunities do not exist, it is our obligation not to put capital at risk." They happily admit that other funds might well reap short-term gains by running with the pack, but you "have to be willing to look stupid." Their current cash stake is about 34%, "the highest cash level ever in the fund." That's not driven by a market call; it's a simple residue of their inability to find great opportunities.
The guys are not willing to be stupid. Richard and Dowe grew up together and are comfortable challenging each other. Richard knows the limits of Dowe's knowledge (and vice versa), "so we're less likely to hold hands and go off the cliff together." In order to avoid that outcome, they spend a lot of time figuring out how not to be stupid. They relegate some intriguing possibilities to the "too hard pile," those businesses that might have a great story but whose business model or financials are simply too hard to forecast with sufficient confidence. They think about common errors (commitment bias, our ability to rationalize why we're not going to stop doing something once we've started, chief among them) and have generated a set of really interesting tools to help contain them. They maintain, for example, a list all of the reasons why they don't like their current holdings. In advance of any purchase, they list all of the conditions under which they'd quickly sell ("if their star CEO leaves, we do too") and keep that on top of their pile of papers concerning the stock.
They're doing what they love. Before starting Cook & Bynum (the company), both of the guys had high-visibility, highly-compensated positions in financial centers. Richard worked for Tudor Investments in Stamford, CT, while Dowe was with Goldman, Sachs in New York. The guys believe in a fundamental, value- and research-driven, stock-by-stock process. What they were being paid to do (with Tudor's macro event-driven hedge fund strategies for Richard) was about as far from what they most wanted as they could get. And so they quit, moved back to Alabama and set up their own shop to manage their own money and the investments of high net-worth individuals. They created Cook & Bynum (the fund) in response to an investor's request for a product accessible to family and friends. The $250 million invested with them (about $100 million in the fund) includes 100% of their own liquid net worth, with their investment split between the fund and the partnerships. Since both sets of vehicles use the same fees and structure, there's no conflict between the two.
They do prodigious research without succumbing to the "gotta buy something" impulse. While they spend the majority of their time in their offices, they're also comfortable with spending two or three weeks at a time on the road. Their argument is that they've got to understand the entire ecosystem in which a firm operates – from the quality of its distribution network to the feelings of its customers – which they can only do first-hand. Nonetheless, they've been pretty good at resisting "deal momentum." They spent, for example, some three weeks traveling around Estonia, Poland and Hungary. Found nothing compelling. Traveled Greece and Turkey and learned a lot, including how deeply dysfunctional the Greek economy, is but bought nothing.
They're willing to do what you won't. Most of us profess a buy low / buy the unloved / break from the herd / embrace our inner contrarian ethos. And most of us are deluded. Cook and Bynum seem rather less so: they're holding cash now while others buy stocks after the market has doubled and profits margins hit records but in the depth of the 2008 meltdown they were buyers. (They report having skipped Christmas presents in 2008 in order to have extra capital to invest.) As the market bottomed in March 2009, the fund was down to 2% cash.
Bottom Line: the guys seem to be looking for two elusive commodities. One is investments worth pursuing. The other is investing partners who share their passion for compelling investments and their willingness to let other investors charge off in a herd. Neither is as common as you might hope.
The conference call (When you click on the link, the file will load in your browser and will begin playing after it's partially loaded.)
The profile:
It's working. Cook and Bynum might well be among the best. They're young. The fund is small and nimble. Their discipline makes great sense. It's not magic, but it has been very, very good and offers an intriguing alternative for investors concerned by lockstep correlations and watered-down portfolios.
The Mutual Fund Observer profile of COBYX, April 2013.
The COBYX audio profile
The Cook & Bynum Fund website
The Cook and Bynum Fact Sheet
Fund Focus: Resources from other trusted sources
This entry was posted in Podcasts on April 1, 2013 by Editor.
← Whitebox Market Neutral Equity Fund, Investor Class (WBLSX), April 2013 April 1, 2013 →


text:
package com.mohiva.play.silhouette.api

import org.specs2.specification.Scope
import play.api.GlobalSettings
import play.api.i18n.{ Lang, Messages, MessagesApi }
import play.api.test.{ FakeRequest, PlaySpecification, WithApplication }

/**
 * Test case for the [[com.mohiva.play.silhouette.api.SecuredSettings]] trait.
 */
class SecuredSettingsSpec extends PlaySpecification {

  "The `SecuredSettings` implementation" should {
    "return None as default value for onNotAuthenticated method " in new WithApplication with Context {
      val settings = new SecuredSettings with GlobalSettings {}
      settings.onNotAuthenticated(FakeRequest(GET, "/"), messages) should beNone
    }

    "return None as default value for onNotAuthenticated method " in new WithApplication with Context {
      val settings = new SecuredSettings with GlobalSettings {}
      settings.onNotAuthorized(FakeRequest(GET, "/"), messages) should beNone
    }
  }

  /**
   * The context.
   */
  trait Context extends Scope {
    self: WithApplication =>

    /**
     * The messages API.
     */
    val messagesAPI = app.injector.instanceOf[MessagesApi]

    /**
     * The messages for the current language.
     */
    val messages = Messages(Lang("en-US"), messagesAPI)
  }
}


Turkey, 12 February 2019 -- Based in Turkey, Türk Amerikan Derneği Yabanci Dil Kurslari Bakırköy Subesi is a language school that lets people learn English with the help of its superior Bakirkoy English Course.
Istanbul, (February 12, 2019) - Türk Amerikan Derneği Yabanci Dil Kurslari Bakırköy Subesi was set up in 1951, as an outcome of bilateral agreements between the US and Turkey. It is an esteemed non-governmental agency that lets people learn English and other foreign languages with its system, which is proven and has been made perfect with many years of experience. Its bakırköy ingilizce kursu (Bakirkoy English Course) is designed to provide students with the best training and knowledge of English.
Its course can offer an international experience and the highest level of education to students. The course includes an English Proficiency Exam that is categorized into Elementary, Pre-Intermediate, Intermediate and Upper. The center has professionally trained staffs to help students learn English within the shortest possible time. Its training method is centered on students who are unable to participate in standard academic courses due to some reason and can get trained in the subjects that they appear to have missed.
Its course includes a Communicative Approach method that lets students have a speech-oriented education and make them capable of speaking in English more, and in a manner that is catchy and comprehendible.
Türk Amerikan Derneği Yabanci Dil Kurslari Bakırköy Subesi (Turkish American Association Foreign Language Courses Bakırköy Subesi) is headquartered in İstanbul, Bakırköy and offers bakırköy ingilizce kursları (English courses in bakirkoy). This language school was established in Turkey in 1951and helps people learn and speak foreign languages with pride.
For further information or enquiries, visit https://www.tadbakirkoy.com/.
Phone no: (0212) 572 78 66.


What the broom leaves behind.
Tell me about your poem "[tension]".
I wrote it as part of a series for a class I took in London: Fictions of Empire.
The South. The City. The post-colonial, post-Marxist, post-Auschwitz, post-modern post-intellectual.
Flannery O'Connor made me want to write. But I like to think everything important I've read from her on has had an influence.
Please, please, please, please learn proper grammar. You cannot manipulate a language you have no control over.
This entry was posted on Tuesday, August 27th, 2013 at 1:47 pm	and posted in Uncategorized.	You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed.


Mothering Sunday was well-attended in Greyfriars. Thank you to Gwen, Hazel and everyone who provided flowers and the beautiful hand-made cards. It was lovely to see all the children, mothers, and grand-mothers there. Particularly moving were the gospel lesson read by Sophie and the poem read by Sylvie. Both so well done! Afterwards, flowers were also distributed to elderly church members who are either house-bound or living in a care home.
The new opening hours for SCVS are Monday - Thursday: 9 am - 4 pm. Friday - CLOSED.
The new address for SCVS is 28 St Mary Street, Kirkcudbright DG6 4DN. Email and telephone numbers remain unchanged.


The C7236 CW combination whirlpool bathtub is a two person acrylic whirlpool and air massage bath, the ultimate massage bath. This jacuzzi-style bath is unmatched in design and total body massage therapy. A rectangular bath that can also be incorporated into a shower. The bath's 36″ exterior width allows the bath to be placed into a bathroom with restricted space which is perfect for remodeling.
Watertech placed water and air injectors (jets) throughout the bath to provide maximum massage pressure over the total body from a variety of angles. The top deck of the tub is large enough to hold most deck mounted faucets and hand sprayers.
We recommend that you take time to go to our website to understand the difference between Watertech's combination massage systems and other manufacturers inexpensive drilled holed systems.
All Watertech baths are U.L. listed and proudly made in the USA, a claim many brands can not advertise.


Liberals Al Franken and Joe Conason are out with books claiming that the news media are not as liberal as they seem. But the network news coverage of the rally marking the 40th anniversary of the March on Washington demonstrates that the media have moved far beyond liberal bias. In this case, network news correspondents concealed the hijacking of the civil rights movement by political extremists, Muslim activists, and Marxists.
One speaker, Mahdi Bray of the Muslim American Society, called President Bush a "modern-day Pharaoh." He used his speech to promote an upcoming October 25 march on Washington to protest U.S. policy on Iraq that is being sponsored by International ANSWER, a front group of the communist Workers World Party. International ANSWER was a co-sponsor of this 40th anniversary event designed to honor Martin Luther King and celebrate his "I have a dream" speech of 40 years ago.
Billy Thye of the American Indian Movement said the real terrorist in the world was the U.S. government, while Obi Egbuna of the Pan African Liberation Organization praised black racist Robert Mugabe of Zimbabwe and urged the lifting of the economic embargo of communist Cuba. He said, "We must stand behind Mugabe," the African dictator whose policies are starving half of his population. On the other hand, he called U.S. Secretary of State Colin Powell "a murderer." Damu Smith of a group called "Black Voices for Peace" attacked what he called the 4 "Cs"?Colin Powell, Justice Clarence Thomas, National Security Advisor Condoleezza Rice, and Ward Connerly. They were considered despicable for associating with conservative or Republican causes.
Why would the media ignore these controversial speakers? If the media had noted that Democratic Party presidential candidates Howard Dean, Al Sharpton and Carol Mosely-Braun had attended the rally, it could leave them tainted in the public mind with having participated in an anti-American rally at a time when most voters already view the Democratic Party with suspicion on national security issues.
It is significant that Sharpton himself spoke to the crowd, reminding them that Martin Luther King had used the first part of his "I have a dream" speech to press his demand for the cashing of a check made payable to black people. Banners and posters seeking financial reparations for slavery were visible in the crowd. The National Coalition of Blacks for Reparations says blacks are owed trillions of dollars. If elected president, Howard Dean may try to pay them off.


Do you have a product that you think would be perfect for big box stores but the thought of the buyer meeting before getting your product on shelves makes you a nervous wreck? Maybe you have a meeting scheduled soon and you want to ensure success? Or maybe you just want to figure out your story prior to scheduling one. Whatever your concern, these quick tips will help you rock your next retail buyer meeting.
Retail buyers absolutely hate it when you don't check out their stores prior to the meeting. Not only does it give them the impression that you are not serious about doing business with them, but buyers will almost always ask you about the last time you checked out their stores. It's to your benefit to make this happen.
Buyers want to hear your perspective as to how they can improve their bottom line, and the best way to do this is to have you review their stores and tell them why your product is better, different and more interesting than what they have in their stores today. Buyers love it when you show them how your product will fulfill a need for their customer base that they are currently not addressing in their stores. So help them figure this out by going shopping!
Did you know that most chain stores have a vendor website that will tell you the requirements they are looking for in potential vendors?
These websites can be invaluable to review prior to the buyer meeting. Not only will it show the buyer that you are serious about doing business with them, but often times these vendor portals provide valuable information about the retailer that you need to know for the meeting.
To find one of these vendor portals, just do an internet search by typing the name of the retailer and the word 'vendor' next to it.
One of the main reasons companies are not getting their products into stores is because they haven't convinced the buyer how their product will make the store money. It's as simple as that.
Most companies approach buyers with the features and benefits of their product — and that's why most product companies are not succeeding with retail! Buyers are in the business of generating revenue for their stores, and it is imperative that you convince them how your product will sell.
Mention how many units you've sold so far, which retailers are currently selling your product, etc. Buyers want to know this!
And for those of you who do not have that 'money story' yet, have no fear! There's always a workaround if you have a new product with no proven sales. There are plenty of examples of great products that have gotten into retail stores with no previous sales.
There is nothing more annoying to a buyer than receiving inefficient marketing collateral about a new product. And when I say inefficient, I mean marketing collateral that doesn't tell a buyer in five seconds or less what the product is and does. Less is more when it comes to marketing collateral when trying to pitch a chain store buyer. A one-page sell sheet can be the most effective marketing tool you have when it comes to selling to big box stores because it gives the buyer all the information she needs in a quick snapshot.
Buyers prefer visuals over endless words to describe a product. Bullet points, product images, packaging and a 'money story' are ideal to have on your marketing material.
Bottom line is that buyers are too busy to try and decipher new product information. That is why you should focus your efforts on telling your story on your marketing collateral in a one page, simple format.
If you have a meeting with a buyer, don't overwhelm them by showing all of your products at the same time. Create a story by showing them one product at a time — starting with your best sellers first.
A buyer wants you to walk them through exactly which product they should buy first and why. This shows them that you are serious, organized and that you understand your product and category.
Don't ask the buyer to pick which products they like best, tell the buyer which products they should buy first and then show them the other product options that you have available. Buyers appreciate this because it creates an organized and effective buyer meeting.
Having a successful buyer meeting can be the difference between you exponentially growing your business — or not. So spend some time preparing yourself for these meetings by utilizing these tips and you will be on your way to retail success!
Karen Waksman, Founder and CEO of Retail MBA, is a Manufacturer's Rep turned Author, Speaker and Consultant. Karen has taught tens of 1000's of product entrepreneurs and companies across the globe on the subject of selling to retailers. Her goal is to empower and inspire companies to transform their businesses by providing them all of the necessary information they need in order to become chain store vendors.