If he did , she would never forgive him . One evening in early harvest Estella was lingering by the lane gate at twilight . She had worked slavishly all day and was very tired , but she was loath to go into the house , where her trouble always seemed to weigh on her more heavily . The dusk , sweet night seemed to soothe her as it always did . She leaned her head against the poplar by the gate . How long Spencer Morgan had been standing by her she did not know , but when she looked up he was there . In the dim light she could see how haggard and hollow-eyed he had grown . He had changed almost as much as herself . The girl 's first proud impulse was to turn coldly away and leave him . But some strange tumult in her heart kept her still . What had he come to say ? There was a moment 's fateful silence . Then Spencer spoke in a muffled voice . `` I could n't go away without seeing you once more , Estella , to say good-bye . Perhaps you wo n't speak to me . You must hate me . I deserve it . '' He paused , but she said no word . She could not . After a space , he went wistfully on .
`` I XXXXX you can never forgive me -- no girl could .
forgive go hate know paused say see speak spoke went