But you 've been so much to me -- you mean so much to me . You 've made me believe in things I never believed in before . You -- you -- I know now that there is such a thing as a good woman , a woman who could make a man better , just because he breathed the same air with her . '' He paused for a moment ; then went on in a still lower tone : `` It 's hard when a fellow ca n't speak of his mother because he ca n't say anything good of her , is n't it ? My mother was n't a good woman . When I was eight years old she went away with a scoundrel . It broke father 's heart . Nobody thought I understood , I was such a little fellow . But I did . I heard them talking . I knew she had brought shame and disgrace on herself and us . And I had loved her so ! Then , somehow , as I grew up , it was my misfortune that all the women I had to do with were mean and base . They were hirelings , and I hated and feared them . There was an aunt of mine -- she tried to be good to me in her way . But she told me a lie , and I never cared for her after I found it out . And then , father -- we loved each other and were good chums . But he did n't believe in much either . He was bitter , you know . He said all women were alike .
I grew up XXXXX that notion .
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