Then one day he went away -- suddenly . I had thought he cared for me , but he never said so -- just went away . Oh , the shame of it ! After a time I heard that he had been ordered to California for his health . And he died out there the next spring . My heart broke then , I never cared for anybody again -- I could n't . I have always loved him . But it would have been so much easier to bear if I had only known that he loved me -- oh , it would have made all the difference in the world . And the sting of it has been there all these years . I ca n't even permit myself the joy of dwelling on his memory because of the thought that perhaps he did not care . '' `` He must have cared , '' I said warmly . `` He could n't have helped it , Miss Sylvia . '' Miss Sylvia shook her head with a sad smile . `` I can not be sure . Sometimes I think he did . But then the doubt creeps back again . I would give almost anything to know that he did -- to know that I have not lavished all the love of my life on a man who did not want it . And I never can know , never -- I can hope and almost believe , but I can never know . Oh , you do n't understand -- a man could n't fully understand what my pain has been over it . You see now why I want you to change the story .
I am sorry for XXXXX poor girl , but if you only let her know that he really loves her she will not mind all the rest so very much ; she will be able to bear the pain of even life-long separation if she only knows . ''
After day for of out over that to with years