Yes , it was ; I will admit that much . I was provoked at Jack 's determination to settle down for life in Valleyfield , a horrible , humdrum , little country village . `` You 'll never make your fortune there , Jack , '' I said spitefully . `` You 'll just be a poor , struggling country doctor all your life , and you 'll be grey at forty . '' `` I do n't expect to make a fortune , Kitty , '' said Jack quietly . `` Do you think that is the one desirable thing ? I shall never be a rich man . But riches are not the only thing that makes life pleasant . '' `` Well , I think they have a good deal to do with it , anyhow , '' I retorted . `` It 's all very well to pretend to despise wealth , but it 's generally a case of sour grapes . I will own up honestly that I 'd love to be rich . '' It always seems to make Jack blue and grumpy when I talk like that . I suppose that is one reason why he never asked me to settle down in life as a country doctor 's wife . Another was , no doubt , that I always nipped his sentimental sproutings religiously in the bud . Three weeks ago Alicia wrote to me , asking me to spend the winter with her . Her letters always make me just gasp with longing for the life they describe . Jack 's face , when I told him about it , was so woebegone that I felt a stab of remorse , even in the heyday of my delight . `` Do you really mean it , Kitty ? Are you going away to leave me ? '' `` You wo n't miss me much , '' I said flippantly -- I had a creepy , crawly presentiment that a scene of some kind was threatening -- `` and I 'm awfully tired of Thrush Hill and country life , Jack .
I suppose it is horribly ungrateful XXXXX me to say so , but it is the truth . ''
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