He had never kissed me since the summer before he went away to college . Somehow it did n't seem a bit the same as it used to ; it was -- nicer now . After he went away I came upstairs and had a good , comfortable howl . Then I buried the whole affair decently . I am not going to think of it any more . I shall always have the highest esteem for Jack , and I hope he will soon find some nice girl who will make him happy . Mary Carter would jump at him , I know . To be sure , she is as homely as she can be and live . But , then , Jack is always telling me how little he cares for beauty , so I have no doubt she will suit him admirably . As for myself -- well , I am ambitious . I do n't suppose my ambition is a very lofty one , but such as it is I mean to hunt it down . Come . Let me put it down in black and white , once for all , and see how it looks : I mean to marry the rich nephew of the Sinclairs . There ! It is out , and I feel better . How mercenary and awful it looks written out in cold blood like that . I would n't have Jack or Aunt Elizabeth -- dear , unworldly old soul -- see it for the world . But I would n't mind Alicia . Poor dear Jack ! * * * * * Montreal , Dec. 16 , 18 -- .
This is a nice way XXXXX keep a journal .
After at before for in like of since so to