`` It 's a bad habit , child . Do n't let it grow on you . Come . '' I went , feeling crushed and furious and ashamed . I knew her at once when I went down to the drawing-room . There were three other strange women there , but I knew she was the only one who could be Mrs. Rennie . I felt such a horrible queer sinking feeling at my heart when I saw her . Oh , she was beautiful ... I had never seen anyone so beautiful . And Sidney was standing beside her , talking to her , with a smile on his face , but none in his eyes ... I noticed that at a glance . She was so tall and slender and willowy . Her dress was wonderful , and her bare throat and shoulders were like pearls . Her hair was pale , pale gold , and her eyes long-lashed and sweet , and her mouth like a scarlet blossom against her creamy face . I thought of how I must look beside her ... an awkward little girl in a short skirt with my hair in a braid and too many hands and feet , and I would have given anything then to be tall and grown-up and graceful . I watched her all the evening and the queer feeling in me somewhere grew worse and worse . I could n't eat anything . Sidney took Mrs. Rennie in ; they sat opposite to me and talked all the time . I was so glad when the dinner was over and everybody gone . The first thing I did when I escaped to my room was to go to the glass and look myself over just as critically and carefully as if I were somebody else . I saw a great rope of dark brown hair ... a brown skin with red cheeks ... a big red mouth ... a pair of grey eyes . That was all .
And when I thought of that shimmering witch woman with her white skin and shining hair I wanted XXXXX put out the light and cry in the dark .
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