Mattie had been so kind to him . It was only honourable of him in return not to let her throw herself away on a poor failure like himself . `` I suppose this is your last round with the wagon , '' she said . She had taken him out into the garden to say it . The garden was out of view from the Ford place . Propose she must , but she drew the line at proposing under Selena 's eyes . Jed nodded dully . `` Yes , and then I must toddle off and look for something else to do . You see , I have n't much of a gift so to speak for business , Mattie , and it takes me so long to get worked into an understanding of a business or trade that I 'm generally asked to quit before you might say I 've really commenced . It 's been a mighty happy summer for me , though I ca n't say I 've done much in the selling line except to you , Mattie . What with your kindness and these little visits you 've been good enough to let me make every week , I feel I may say it 's been the happiest summer of my life , and I 'm never going to forget it , but as I said , it 's time for me to be moving on elsewhere and finding something else to do . '' `` There is something for you to do right here -- if you will do it , '' said Mattie faintly . For a moment she felt as if she could not go on ; Jed and the garden and the scarf of late asters whirled around her dizzily . She held by the sweet-pea trellis to steady herself . `` I -- I said a terrible thing to Selena the other day . I -- I do n't know what I 'll do about it if -- if -- you do n't help me out , Jed . '' `` I 'll do anything I can , '' said Jed , with hearty sympathy . `` You know that , Mattie . What is the trouble ? '' His kindly voice and the good will and affection beaming in his honest blue eyes gave Mattie renewed courage to go on with her self-imposed and most embarrassing task , although before she ended her voice shook and dwindled away to such a low whisper that Jed had to bend his head close to hers to hear what she was saying .
`` I -- I said -- she goaded me XXXXX saying it , Jed -- slighting and slurring -- jeering at me because you were going away .
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