She must decide for herself . Not even of Aunt Charlotte or Aunt Ellen could she ask advice . She knew they would entreat her to accept , and she needed no such incentive to her own wishes . Far on into the night Worth sat at the white-curtained dormer window , looking at the stars over the apple trees , and fighting her battle between inclination and duty . It was a hard and stubbornly contested battle , but with that square chin and those unfaltering grey eyes it could end in only one way . Next day Worth went down to Greenwood . `` Well , what is it to be ? '' said Uncle Paul without preface , as he met her in the garden . `` I can not come , Uncle Paul , '' said Worth steadily . `` I can not give up my mother . '' `` I do n't ask you to give her up , '' he said gruffly . `` You can write to her and visit her . I do n't want to come between parent and child . '' `` That is n't the point exactly , Uncle Paul . I hope you will not be angry with me for not accepting your offer . I wanted to -- you do n't know how much I wanted to -- but I can not . Mother and I are so much to each other , Uncle Paul , more , I am sure , than even most mothers and daughters . You have never let me speak of her , but I must tell you this . Mother has often told me that when I came to her things were going very hard with her and that I was heaven 's own gift to comfort and encourage her . Then , in the ten years that followed , the three other babies that came to her all died before they were two years old .
And XXXXX each loss Mother said I grew dearer to her .
as before for in of than that to with without