I do not think she has any pity or mercy for any one . Besides , what she said was quite true . When she thanked me for being so REASONABLE I told her I was not doing it to please her , but for Paul 's sake , because I would not spoil his life , and that I would always hate her . She smiled again and went away . Oh , how can I bear it ? I did not know any one could suffer like this ! August 18 . I have done it . I wrote to Paul to-day . I knew I must tell him by letter , because I could never make him believe it face to face . I was afraid I could not even do it by letter . I suppose a clever woman easily could , but I am so stupid . I wrote a great many letters and tore them up , because I felt sure they would n't convince Paul . At last I got one that I thought would do . I knew I must make it seems as if I were very frivolous and heartless , or he would never believe . I spelled some words wrong and put in some mistakes of grammar on purpose . I told him I had just been flirting with him , and that I had another fellow at home I liked better . I said FELLOW because I knew it would disgust him . I said that it was only because he was rich that I was tempted to marry him . I thought would my heart would break while I was writing those dreadful falsehoods .
But it was XXXXX his sake , because I must not spoil his life .
Besides at because by for in like that while with