Gertrude Oliver says she just feels the same . -LRB- She is the most honest person I know . She never pretends anything . -RRB- She says babies bore her until they are old enough to talk and then she likes them -- but still a good ways off . Mother and Nan and Di all adore babies and seem to think I 'm unnatural because I do n't . `` I have n't seen Kenneth since the night of the party . He was here one evening after Jem came back but I happened to be away . I do n't think he mentioned me at all -- at least nobody told me he did and I was determined I would n't ask -- but I do n't care in the least . All that matters absolutely nothing to me now . The only thing that does matter is that Jem has volunteered for active service and will be going to Valcartier in a few more days -- my big , splendid brother Jem . Oh , I 'm so proud of him ! `` I suppose Kenneth would enlist too if it were n't for his ankle . I think that is quite providential . He is his mother 's only son and how dreadful she would feel if he went . Only sons should never think of going ! '' Walter came wandering through the valley as Rilla sat there , with his head bent and his hands clasped behind him . When he saw Rilla he turned abruptly away ; then as abruptly he turned and came back to her . `` Rilla-my-Rilla , what are you thinking of ? '' `` Everything is so changed , Walter , '' said Rilla wistfully . `` Even you -- you 're changed .
A week ago we were all so happy -- and -- and -- now I just ca n't find myself XXXXX all .
as at because behind for if that through to until