I 'm the only boy Mother had . Oh , I do so wish I was bigger and older ! If I was I could do something to save the place -- I 'm sure I could . It is breaking Mother 's heart to have to leave it . '' `` So she has to leave it , has she ? '' said Turner grimly , with the old hatred stirring in his heart . `` Yes . There is a mortgage on it and we 're to be sold out very soon -- so the lawyers told us . Mother has tried so hard to make the farm pay but she could n't . I could if I was bigger -- I know I could . If they would only wait a few years ! But there is no use hoping for that . Mother cries all the time about it . She has lived at the Cove farm for over thirty years and she says she ca n't live away from it now . Elsie -- that 's my sister -- and I do all we can to cheer her up , but we ca n't do much . Oh , if I was only a man ! '' The lad shut his lips together -- how much his mouth was like his father 's -- and looked out seaward with troubled blue eyes . Turner smiled another grim smile . Oh , Neil Jameson , your old score was being paid now ! Yet something embittered the sweetness of revenge .
That boy 's face -- he could not hate it as he had accustomed himself XXXXX hate the memory of Neil Jameson and all connected with him .
So about for if in like of on to with