They tried to think so , but a shadow stalked in the background of their determined merrymaking . Walter , too , was quiet and dull , all through the holidays . He showed Rilla a cruel , anonymous letter he had received at Redmond -- a letter far more conspicuous for malice than for patriotic indignation . `` Nevertheless , all it says is true , Rilla . '' Rilla had caught it from him and thrown it into the fire . `` There is n't one word of truth in it , '' she declared hotly . `` Walter , you 've got morbid -- as Miss Oliver says she gets when she broods too long over one thing . '' `` I ca n't get away from it at Redmond , Rilla . The whole college is aflame over the war . A perfectly fit fellow , of military age , who does n't join up is looked upon as a shirker and treated accordingly . Dr. Milne , the English professor , who has always made a special pet of me , has two sons in khaki ; and I can feel the change in his manner towards me . '' `` It 's not fair -- you 're not fit . '' `` Physically I am . Sound as a bell . The unfitness is in the soul and it 's a taint and a disgrace . There , do n't cry , Rilla . I 'm not going if that 's what you 're afraid of . The Piper 's music rings in my ears day and night -- but I can not follow . '' `` You would break mother 's heart and mine if you did , '' sobbed Rilla . `` Oh , Walter , one is enough for any family . ''
The holidays were an unhappy time XXXXX her .
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