Then the lama raised his head , and looked forth across them into space and emptiness . ` And I am a Follower of the Way , ' he said bitterly . ` The sin is mine and the punishment is mine . I made believe to myself for now I see it was but make-belief -- that thou wast sent to me to aid in the Search . So my heart went out to thee for thy charity and thy courtesy and the wisdom of thy little years . But those who follow the Way must permit not the fire of any desire or attachment , for that is all Illusion . As says ... ' He quoted an old , old Chinese text , backed it with another , and reinforced these with a third . ' I stepped aside from the Way , my chela . It was no fault of thine . I delighted in the sight of life , the new people upon the roads , and in thy joy at seeing these things . I was pleased with thee who should have considered my Search and my Search alone . Now I am sorrowful because thou art taken away and my River is far from me . It is the Law which I have broken ! ' ` Powers of Darkness below ! ' said Father Victor , who , wise in the confessional , heard the pain in every sentence . ' I see now that the sign of the Red Bull was a sign for me as well as for thee . All Desire is red -- and evil . I will do penance and find my River alone . ' ` At least go back to the Kulu woman , ' said Kim , ` otherwise thou wilt be lost upon the roads . She will feed thee till I run back to thee . '
The XXXXX waved a hand to show that the matter was finally settled in his mind .
Kulu Law Red Victor chela fire lama make-belief third years