A splendid Jupiter , with hair well set up off the fine brow , ambrosial beard , silver thunderbolts in one hand , and a well-worn ferule in the other . A large stuffed eagle from the museum stood at his feet ; and the benign expression of his august countenance showed that he was in a good humour -- as well he might be , for he was paid some handsome compliments upon his wise rule , the peaceful state of his kingdom , and the brood of all-accomplished Pallases that yearly issued from his mighty brain . Cheers greeted this and other pleasant words , and caused the thunderer to bow his thanks ; for ` Jove nods ' , as everyone knows , and flattery wins the heart of gods and men . Mrs Juno , with her peacocks , darning-needle , pen , and cooking-spoon , did not get off so easily ; for the Professor was down on her with all manner of mirth-provoking accusations , criticisms , and insults even . He alluded to her domestic infelicity , her meddlesome disposition , sharp tongue , bad temper , and jealousy , closing , however , with a tribute to her skill in caring for the wounds and settling the quarrels of belligerent heroes , as well as her love for youths in Olympus and on earth . Gales of laughter greeted these hits , varied by hisses from some indignant boys , who would not bear , even in joke , any disrespect to dear Mother Bhaer , who , however , enjoyed it all immensely , as the twinkle in her eye and the irrepressible pucker of her lips betrayed . A jolly Bacchus astride of his cask took Vulcan 's place , and appeared to be very comfortable with a beer-mug in one hand , a champagne bottle in the other , and a garland of grapes on his curly head . He was the text of a short temperance lecture , aimed directly at a row of smart young gentlemen who lined the walls of the auditorium . George Cole was seen to dodge behind a pillar at one point , Dolly nudged his neighbour at another , and there was laughter all along the line as the Professor glared at them through his big glasses , and dragged their bacchanalian orgies to the light and held them up to scorn . Seeing the execution he had done , the learned man turned to the lovely Diana , who stood as white and still as the plaster stag beside her , with sandals , bow , and crescent ; quite perfect , and altogether the best piece of statuary in the show . She was very tenderly treated by the paternal critic who , merely alluding to her confirmed spinsterhood , fondness for athletic sports , and oracular powers , gave a graceful little exposition of true art and passed on to the last figure . This was Apollo in full fig , his curls skilfully arranged to hide a well-whitened patch over the eye , his handsome legs correctly poised , and his gifted fingers about to draw divine music from the silvered gridiron which was his lyre . His divine attributes were described , as well as his little follies and failings , among which were his weakness for photography and flute-playing , his attempts to run a newspaper , and his fondness for the society of the Muses ; which latter slap produced giggles and blushes among the girl-graduates , and much mirth among the stricken youths ; for misery loves company , and after this they began to rally . Then , with a ridiculous conclusion , the Professor bowed his thanks ; and after several recalls the curtain fell , but not quickly enough to conceal Mercury , wildly waving his liberated legs , Hebe dropping her teapot , Bacchus taking a lovely roll on his barrel , and Mrs Juno rapping the impertinent Owlsdark on the head with Jove 's ruler . While the audience filed out to supper in the hall , the stage was a scene of dire confusion as gods and goddesses , farmers and barons , maids and carpenters , congratulated one another on the success of their labours . Assuming various costumes , actors and actresses soon joined their guests , to sip bounteous draughts of praise with their coffee , and cool their modest blushes with ice-cream . Mrs Meg was a proud and happy woman when Miss Cameron came to her as she sat by Josie , with Demi serving both , and said , so cordially that it was impossible to doubt the sincerity of her welcome words : ` Mrs Brooke , I no longer wonder where your children get their talent . I make my compliments to the Baron and next summer you must let me have little `` Dolly '' as a pupil when we are at the beach . ' One can easily imagine how this offer was received , as well as the friendly commendation bestowed by the same kind critic on the work of Beaumont and Fletcher , who hastened to explain that this trifle was only an attempt to make nature and art go hand in hand , with little help from fine writing or imposing scenery . Everybody was in the happiest mood , especially ` little Dolly ' , who danced like a will-o ' - the-wisp with light-footed Mercury and Apollo as he promenaded with the Marquise on his arm , who seemed to have left her coquetry in the green room with her rouge .
When all was over , Mrs Juno said to XXXXX , to whose arm she clung as they trudged home along the snowy paths : ` Fritz dear , Christmas is a good time for new resolutions , and I 've made one never to be impatient or fretful with my beloved husband again .
Apollo Bhaer Diana Jove Professor goddesses gridiron lyre neighbour thunderer