` Long in March , aunt , she ketched cold , took tew her bed , got wuss , an ' told me tew hurry up , fer nary cent should I hev , ef I war n't safely merried ` fore she stepped out . I thought that was ruther craoudin ' a feller ; but I see she was goan sure , an ' I 'd got inter a way er considerin ' the cash mine , so that it come hard to hear abaout givin ' on ' t up . Off I went that evenin ' an ' asked Almiry Nash ef she 'd hev me . No , she would n't ; I 'd shilly-shallyed so long , she 'd got tired er waitin ' and took tew keepin ' company with a doctor daown ter Banggore , where she 'd ben visitin ' a spell . I did n't find that as hard a nub to swaller , as I 'd a thought I would , though Almiry was the richest , pootiest , and good-naterest of the lot . Aunt larfed waal , an ' told me tew try ag ` in ; so a couple er nights arfter , I spruced up , an ' went over to Car ` line Miles 's ; she was as smart as old cheese , an ' waal off in tew the barg ` in . I was just as sure she 'd hev me , as I be that I 'm gittin ' the rewmatiz a settin ' in this ma ` sh . But that minx , Almiry , hed ben and let on abaout her own sarsy way er servin ' on me , an ' Car ` line jest up an ' said she war n't goan to hev annybuddy 's leavin 's ; so daown I come ag ` in . `` Things was gettin ' desper ' t by that time ; fer aunt was failin ' rapid , an ' the story hed leaked aout some way , so the hull taown was gigglin ' over it . I thought I 'd better quit them parts ; but aunt she showed me her will all done complete , ` sceptin the fust name er the legatee . ` There , ' sez she , ` it all depends on yeou , whether that place is took by Hiram or Josiah . It 's easy done , an ' so it 's goan tew stan till the last minit . ' That riled me consid ` able , an ' I streaked off tew May Jane Simlin 's . She wa n't very waal off , nor extra harnsome , but she was pious the worst kind , an ' dreadf ' l clever to them she fancied . But I was daown on my luck ag ` in ; fer at the fust word I spoke of merryin ' , she showed me the door , an ' give me to understan ' that she could n't think er hevin ' a man that war n't a church-member , that had n't experienced religion , or even ben struck with conviction , an ' all the rest o n't . Ef anny one hed a wanted tew hev seen a walkin ' hornet 's nest , they could hev done it cheap that night , as I went hum . I jest bounced intew the kitchen , chucked my hat intew one corner , my coat intew ` nother , kicked the cat , cussed the fire , drawed up a chair , and set scaoulin ' like sixty , bein ' tew mad fer talkin ' . The young woman that was nussin ' aunt , -- Bewlah Blish , by name , -- was a cooking grewel on the coals , and ` peared tew understan ' the mess I was in ; but she did n't say nothin ' , only blowed up the fire , fetched me a mug er cider , an ' went raound so kinder quiet , and sympathizing that I found the wrinkles in my temper gettin ' smoothed aout ` mazin ' quick ; an ' fore long I made a clean breast er the hull thing . Bewlah larfed , but I did n't mind her doin ' o n't , for she sez , sez she , real sort o ' cunnin ' , -- '' ` Poor Hiram ! they did n't use yeou waal .
Yeou ought to hev tried some er the poor an ' humly girls ; they 'd a been glad an ' grateful fer such a sweetheart as XXXXX be . '
abaout er grewel keepin merryin scaoulin tew war wuss yeou