I 've more than paid for it , and such a rascal is better out of the world than in it , showing boys the way to hell . Yes , I know you think that 's awful in me ; but I ca n't help it . I hate a scamp as I do a skulking coyote , and always want to get a shot at 'em . Perhaps it would have been better if he had killed me ; my life is spoilt . ' All the old prison gloom seemed to settle like a black cloud on Dan 's face as he spoke , and Mrs Jo was frightened at the glimpse it gave her of the fire through which he had passed to come out alive , but scarred for life . Hoping to turn his mind to happier things , she said cheerfully : ` No , it is n't ; you have learned to value it more and use it better for this trial . It is not a lost year , but one that may prove the most helpful of any you ever know . Try to think so , and begin again ; we will help , and have all the more confidence in you for this failure . We all do the same and struggle on . ' ' I never can be what I was . I feel about sixty , and do n't care for anything now I 've got here . Let me stay till I 'm on my legs , then I 'll clear out and never trouble you any more , ' said Dan despondently . ` You are weak and low in your mind ; that will pass , and by and by you will go to your missionary work among the Indians with all the old energy and the new patience , self-control , and knowledge you have gained . Tell me more about that good chaplain and Mary Mason and the lady whose chance word helped you so much . I want to know all about the trials of my poor boy . ' Won by her tender interest , Dan brightened up and talked on till he had poured out all the story of that bitter year , and felt better for the load he lifted off . If he had known how it weighed upon his hearer 's heart , he would have held his peace ; but she hid her sorrow till she had sent him to bed , comforted and calm ; then she cried her heart out , to the great dismay of Fritz and Laurie , till they heard the tale and could mourn with her ; after which they all cheered up and took counsel together how best to help this worst of all the ` catastrophes ' the year had brought them . Chapter 21 . ASLAUGA 'S KNIGHT It was curious to see the change which came over Dan after that talk . A weight seemed off his mind ; and though the old impetuous spirit flashed out at times , he seemed intent on trying to show his gratitude and love and honour to these true friends by a new humility and confidence very sweet to them , very helpful to him .
After hearing the story from Mrs Jo , the Professor and Mr XXXXX made no allusion to it beyond the hearty hand-grasp , the look of compassion , the brief word of good cheer in which men convey sympathy , and a redoubled kindness which left no doubt of pardon .
ASLAUGA Dan Fritz Indians Jo Laurie Mason fire scamp year