`` Yes , I gave up hoping then , but I did n't like to own it . I tried to think it was a sick fancy , and would not let it trouble anyone . But when I saw you all so well and strong and full of happy plans , it was hard to feel that I could never be like you , and then I was miserable , Jo . '' `` Oh , Beth , and you did n't tell me , did n't let me comfort and help you ? How could you shut me out , bear it all alone ? '' Jo 's voice was full of tender reproach , and her heart ached to think of the solitary struggle that must have gone on while Beth learned to say goodbye to health , love , and life , and take up her cross so cheerfully . `` Perhaps it was wrong , but I tried to do right . I was n't sure , no one said anything , and I hoped I was mistaken . It would have been selfish to frighten you all when Marmee was so anxious about Meg , and Amy away , and you so happy with Laurie -- at least I thought so then . '' `` And I thought you loved him , Beth , and I went away because I could n't , '' cried Jo , glad to say all the truth . Beth looked so amazed at the idea that Jo smiled in spite of her pain , and added softly , `` Then you did n't , dearie ? I was afraid it was so , and imagined your poor little heart full of lovelornity all that while . '' `` Why , Jo , how could I , when he was so fond of you ? '' asked Beth , as innocently as a child . `` I do love him dearly . He is so good to me , how can I help It ? But he could never be anything to me but my brother . I hope he truly will be , sometime . '' `` Not through me , '' said Jo decidedly . `` Amy is left for him , and they would suit excellently , but I have no heart for such things , now .
I do n't care what becomes of anybody but you , XXXXX .
Amy Beth Jo Laurie Marmee Meg dearie left lovelornity right