by mc lars and rob piccininni jr music by mc lars rob piccininni jr and steve connolly party at the church of scientology let me drop some science on scientology l ron hubbards weird sci fi philosophy they cloud theology in top secrecy technology mythology and no apology 1952 was when it all began started on a bet by a frustrated man his books werent selling so l ron thought fast hed start a new religion and make a lot of cash alien rulers past lives tone scales copy written texts and scary emails shutting up the critics court battles left and right mysterious deaths in the middle of the night personality tests e meters narconon time square recruitment from dusk to dawn all this from the guy who wrote battlefield earth salvation for a fee lets see what your souls worth theres a place in florida where youve got friends well help you transcend if you give us those ends dont call it a cult you just dont understand write us a check and take our hand actors are a target for their army of elite they feed their self esteem and make them feel complete they mess with their minds just look at tom cruise jumping on the couch during oprahs interviews john travolta fights thetans in his florida estate piloting his plane dianetics books on tape beck counts past lives in a temple in bel air katie holmes stays home and plays pregnant solitaire isaac hayes still pays to reach that upper level state but left south park when they hated on his faith sonny bono made donations should have bought better skis doug e fresh recruits haters on the mic as he mcs juliette lewis jason lee and chaka khan because of l ron all their money is gone chick corea kirstie alley and nancy cartwright host weekly prayer circles under ufo headlines once you step into the temple your troubles will be gone well get you back on track everybody sing along dont listen to the lies you know theyre all untrue so why not come on down cause were waiting for you so thats scientology p s e u d o r e l i g i o n youve heard so now you know they drain your cash fast so as long as you agree you cant put a price on freedom when its coming c o d okay they ruin lives and it sounds like science fiction what about noahs ark jesus and the crucifiction faith is subjective you cant say whos right or wrong though ill probably end up missing just for writing this song hey did you guys hear that the easter bunnys bringing bigfoot to the meeting tonight stay away stay away stay away from scientology stay away from scientology 