head knight ni knights ni ni ni arthur who are you head knight we are the knights who say ni arthur no not the knights who say ni head knight the same bedevere who are they head knight we are the keepers of the sacred words ni pen and ni wom random ni wom arthur those who hear them seldom live to tell the tale head knight the knights who say ni demand a sacrifice arthur knights of ni we are but simple travellers who seek the enchanter who lives beyond these woods head knight ni ni ni ni arthur and party oh ow head knight we shall say nee again to you if you do not appease us arthur well what is it you want head knight we want a shrubbery arthur a what head knight ni ni arthur and party oh ow arthur please please no more we shall find a shrubbery head knight you must return here with a shrubbery or else you will never pass through this wood alive arthur o knights of ni you are just and fair and we will return with a shrubbery head knight one that looks nice arthur of course head knight and not too expensive arthur yes head knights now go arthur old crone is there anywhere in this town where we could buy a shrubbery crone who sent you arthur the knights who say nee crone agh no never we have no shrubberies here arthur if you do not tell us where we can buy a shrubbery my friend and i will say we will say nee crone agh do your worst arthur very well if you will not assist us voluntarily ni crone no never no shrubberies arthur ni bedevere noo noo arthur no no no no it s not that it s ni bedevere noo arthur no no ni you re not doing it properly bedevere noo ni arthur that s it that s it you ve got it arthur and bedevere ni ni roger are you saying ni to that old woman arthur um yes roger oh what sad times are these when passing ruffians can say ni at will to old ladies there is a pestilence upon this land nothing is sacred even those who arrange and design shrubberies are under considerable economic stress at this period in history arthur did you say shrubberies roger yes shrubberies are my trade i am a shrubber my name is roger the shrubber i arrange design and sell shrubberies bedevere ni arthur no no no no no arthur o knights of ni we have brought you your shrubbery may we go now head knight it is a good shrubbery i like the laurels particularly but there is one small problem arthur what is that head knight we are now no longer the knights who say ni random ni head knight shh shh we are now the knights who say ecky ecky ecky ecky pikang zoom boing mumble mumble random ni head knight therefore we must give you a test arthur what is this test o knights of knights who til recently said ni head knight firstly you must find another shrubbery arthur not another shrubbery head knight then when you have found the shrubbery you must place it here beside this shrubbery only slightly higher so you get a two level effect with a little path running down the middle random a path a path ni head knight then when you have found the shrubbery you must cut down the mightiest tree in the forest with a herring arthur we shall do no such thing head knight oh please arthur cut down a tree with a herring it can t be done knights aaaaugh aaaugh head knight don t say that word arthur what word head knight i cannot tell suffice to say is one of the words the knights of ni cannot hear arthur how can we not say the word if you don t tell us what it is knights aaaaugh aaaugh arthur what is head knight no not is we couldn t get vary far in life not saying is bedevere my liege it s sir robin minstrel packing it in and packing it up and sneaking away and buggering up and chickening out and pissing about yes bravely he is throwing in the sponge arthur oh robin robin my liege it s good to see you knights aaaaugh head knight he said the word arthur surely you ve not given up your quest for the holy grail minstrel he is sneaking away and buggering up robin shut up no no no far from it head knight he said the word again robin i was looking for it knights aaaaugh robin uh here here in this forest arthur no it is far from knights aaaaugh head knight aaaaugh stop saying the word arthur oh stop it knights aaaaugh head knight oh he said it again arthur patsy head knight aaugh i said it i said it ooh i said it again knights aaaaugh 