if you could go back what would you change what would you do again ever would remain the same what would you give and what would you keep what would you take and what would you leave i see an old lady holding the door as i tumble out my wheel chair and roll to the floor first thing in the morning in the grocery store not sure if this alcoholics body can hold me no more i hustled up enough change for the whiskey in my hand tried to tell all the people but they didn t understand too many years spent sleeping in the gutters on my hands and on my knees eating from the rubbish roam the streets with very little keeping me sane too many twisted visions left engraved deep in my brain nightmares are right there and i don t think good thoughts happy memories became haze and days when i could walk make me hate those that have a life and could stand do you people know what i sacrificed for this land my aching heart can t feel the bladed glass in my feet don t take a glance cause i m just a face you pass in the street if you could go back what would you change what would you do again ever would remain the same what would you give and what would you keep what would you take and what would you leave evicted from my home couldn t scrape up the right rent no heat in there all i had was the lights left spent months eating sleeping shitting in my mess thinking back to when my wife left i was quite stressed guess all my addictions had got the best of me sometimes i wish to change my fate or was it destiny look up to the sky on rough nights wondering why i saw our baby girl pass in front of my eyes before it the thought of it tortured me only lived six days was born with deformities still the birth really filled me with joy even though i kinda hoped it would still be a boy i was dealing with demons i carried with me daily wanted to carry on my name when i had the little baby thinking in deep ways til my soul is torn of the bitter sweet day i came home from war if you could go back what would you change what would you do again ever would remain the same what would you give and what would you keep what would you take and what would you leave  i roll out the hospital on honorable discharge i looked down saw my body with horrible big scars brave face but it was bad at night i would break down i woke up and i was paralyzed from the waist down was in a coma for a few weeks before i closed my eyes i was just another soldier with two feet on all type of drugs that set me higher shot by my comrade official name friendly fire everyone was screaming but i only heard her and everyone was crying but i only heard her as i looked down to what i had done i had a split second to contemplate what i had become like it or not trained to kill like it was a job wild or not she was just a child with a rock threat in my eye and the power in my left hand i swear my finger slipped and then the trigger went bang 