this is a song for phil daoust occasional guardian newspaper journal oust i never ever ever mentioned your name or the review that you wrote when i was new to this game but now the time has come i think i ve dealt with my feelings at last i really wanna forgive you phil yeah i wanna put the past in the past a a and as this is london town i thought i ought to take the opportunity cause there s a pretty good chance somebody out there will know you maybe they will pass on a message for me just wanna say phil daoust occasional guardian newspaper journal oust that it s been three years since you wrote it and time is very healing but i still wanna cut big chunks of flesh out of your stupid face and make your children watch while i force you to eat them yeah i wanna make your children watch you eat your own face meat ding dang ding dang dong this is my phil daoust song everybody sing along la la la la la la la i hope one of your family members dies phil ding dang dong i ve written you this special song to help you get the attention you obviously desperately lack and i know that you re a smart man and with such a fine mind i guess it has to be hard to resist throwing narcissistic intellectual tantrums in the supermarket aisles of your self regard just wanna say phil daoust i know it must be really hard to be a journal oust while a deadline s always looming and the pressure to be entertaining so maybe you should quit and get a job that you d be better at like killing yourself you fucking cunt ding dang ding dang dong this is my phil daoust song everybody sing along tra la la la la la la i hope something you love catches on fire phil ding dang dong i ve written you this special song to show how far i ve come along in my efforts to be more mature in the face of negative feedback you fucking poo face
['australian comedy', 'comic']