you asked me to jump the 45 measured feet into the water but i am no folly built for your lazy pleasure if only it were so your hands were fairly stone cold as you placed them on my neck we climbed off the train at birnam we anchored our city living to our rural past high above the fields of killiecrankie we made up rhymes and names for passing polite strangers you dared me out of earshot faces beamed behind backs macgregor pulling on his lead to climb more snowed up steps my winter jacket cast me out as a well dressed loon existing on the margins exciting to be sharing christmas with you all i thought i d see you up the birks o aberfeldy as if some common thoughts would bring us together 10 years later for nothing really just a look just to drink you in i carry your memory like a big bag full of feathers once stuck in the back of my throat but now a warming dream finally i m more concerned about keeping the neighbors cat out of my garden than who you may or may not be fucking and who may be dancing a jig in the middle how stupid i was believing in fate and fairness and all the big questions that i could not answer so i busied myself with the flippancy of art the genius is the subtlety of the waves lapping on the shore slowly taking over the dry shale with it s salty tongue like a lounge singer and uppity nonchalance uncaring for the land it s reclaiming uncaring for the crowds it s drawing the next day i shall walk in it s wake discovering the bones and the pottery once a native of this shoreline paying a visit to the coast hoping to be recognized by descendants of descendants and taken in and loved discovering the bones and the pottery once a native of this shoreline paying a visit to the coast hoping to be recognized by descendants of descendants and taken in and loved from baltimore we sailed hoping to escape my temper i put you in a song wrapped you up with cotton wool i cast you as an angel battling my demons cold bloodedly you took your opportunity a north london hogmanay the year my faith was shattered a sunken city came alive with fireworks eager to please i sang like a stranger and me and my taig friends we drank you under the table and the music you swore by it was nothing it was terrible scared by the noise of your shrieking the dog chased ghosts in the kitchen he tore up newspapers and ate all the jam and the glassware you collected was smashed and lilting on the floor when the saddening sweeps through me like a stubborn sea wind when i m feeling my worst and the best news in world fails to move me i cannot bare your touch or to share a word or gossip or humor well that s when i need you most just to be here to be quiet and warm and free with the drink until i forget such moments exist when the haar rolls in it s just a question of waiting it out and that s when the music i swear gets me through i close my eyes and everything is okay when the haar rolls in it s just a question of waiting it out and that s when the music i swear gets me through i close my eyes and everything s is okay from baltimore we sailed hoping to escape my temper i put you in a song wrapped you up with cotton wool i cast you as an angel battling my demons north london hogmanay the year my faith was shattered