my friend richard s in a bad bad way waking up beaten up every day drinking malt liquor smoking menthols diggin a hole climbing the walls yeah we got to figure out how to get his attention intervention my friend richard s on a bad bad trip can t smile too good through a busted up lip don t smile too much no more no how got to get his shit together got to do it right now all of his friends are feeling the tension intervention chorus we re only here cuz we care about you and we want you to get well you re acting like a asshole and we re sick of it if you can tell twenty seven days on a dry vacation intervention yeah my friend richard doesn t want to go he says fuck y all hell no he s mystified why we re so lame aw but if he wakes up dead will he feel the same somebody kick him in the sack just to stop his bitching intervention chorus 