this next song doesn t go something like this it goes exactly like this eddy was a friend of mine he was killed playing checkers you know that term king me the other guy wasn t sure what he said phil was a friend of mine he was killed walking into a walk in closet he was walking way too fast and way too far dennis was a friend of mine he was killed breaking a wishbone nobody knows if it was an accident or suicide they don t know what he was wishing for bob was a friend of mine nothing happened to him warren was a friend of mine he used to play the guitar down in the subway and then he decided to go electric and he plugged into the third rail and he died like my daddy used to say worst comes to worst we re screwed he told me to think of the sunset from the sun s point of view he told me i was born eight and a half months premature paul was a friend of mine he was killed playing tag it wasn t really tag it was push near the grand canyon when i was a little kid i had a pet possum and he would never ever ever play dead and it pissed me off so much that i killed him you think that maybe maybe i m crazy on a scale of one to ten six being the highest like my daddy said my guardian angle must be an alcoholic he said wind chimes were for stupid people so they d know when there s a breeze thank you very much thanks a lot