when the speaking ceases i know ill stand alone at the foot of a mountain feet sinking into the quiet beneath the mouth of a fool thinking be still and know that i am god beneath storehouses of snow and storehouses of hail with my head hung low ive failed ive failed at the fall when eve stood subservient before the serpent flicking his tongue with his tail choking out the root ill make a god out of you youll be the fruit of my labour together you and i will never die like the creator and the devils eyes dance from side to side while adam stands idly by pointing his finger i swear passivity will prove to be the root of all evil while the mouth like an open grave shifts the blame but i can speak out venom tethered behind my teeth yeah its poisonous its cunning its a venomous seed its the fear that i breed if gives root to a need to drag an audience down with me king david had knees as hard as camels but im working on burning the enamel off my teeth fuming my tongue is a rudder and a forest fire and the whole ship is ablaze sinking into the sea we will not stand for your hand of peace that you sweep over the waves we do not want to be saved i killed a man in my dreams woke up weeping to realize how much the hate in our hearts was getting to me well out of its overflow the mouth speaks so we are attached and i am guilty of rash promises a fools voice and a hasty muscle that beats uncontrollably and yet like the pulse of the tumult colliding against brave peters sense of safety i act in control of my breathing until i am out of breath and then cry out heaven save me hands cuffed over our ears mouths open and rash promises we fail to follow through as we offer them up like they hold conviction and when they come up lacking we can always blame you its so convenient that i can make my passivity your responsibility praise and curse you when i want to so may blessing pour from my mouth lord when i think that you are worth it james sometimes im afraid i may have been grafted into a vine just to spark a flame that burns branches bridges and overwhelms the grapes god i need grace bigger than my mouth i need mercy that resounds ten thousand times as loud i need redemption that rings clearer than my distortion i made it a goal to write down a page a day but then my chest started aching and my legs started shaking uncontrollably anxiety that swallowed whatever words i thought i had to say until i drowned myself whole behind those thick paned glass windows tangled syllables lost letters and words that mean nothing but im trying to learn how to create a landscape from torn paper a dry brush and vapour as if im the creator who makes something out of blank space catering my forward motion to an audience like im the only creature in the ocean that got gods backhand with bitter providence and wondering what it means to sing god left me and breathe simultaneously were all hypocrites baby weve all got serpents in our throats that strike at one anothers heels and hiss as if to boast the pressure between the tongue and the roof of my mouth would be enough to withhold the heel that already crushed the entire skull i need grace bigger than my mouth i need mercy that resounds ten thousand times as loud i need redemption that creates a new song from my distortion 1