on a day hot enough to make the devil cuss i walked into a bar so thirsty i was spittin dust barkeep asked me what ll it be i said whatcha got he said well let s see we got lone star pbr rolling rock shiner bock moose drool o doul s hefeweizen ziegenbock keystone coors light course we got red stripe amstel amsterdam in the tall can michelob miller light guiness by the pint glass doppelbock lager take a swaller cause it s goin fast oatmeal stout and a lot of leinenkugel s open up your wallet no time to be frugal there s 99 bottles of beer on the wall 99 bottles of beer take one down pass it around 98 bottles of beer on the wall well needless to say i was pretty impressed as he handed me an ice cold beer from a chest i said not bad for a hole in the wall barkeep grinned said that ain t all we got rio grande river rock tecate with a twist top dos perros dos equis foster if yer aussie bud light in the new zane williams coozie a dozen wheat beers on tap if you re choosy got heineken killian s labatt s and beck s ice cold coronas with the limes in the necks yuengling chilling with the old milwaukee s best sam adams and that ain t even half of the rest of them 98 bottles of beer on the wall 98 bottles of beer take one down pass it around 97 bottles of beer on the wall  well i settled down with my favorite brew i ordered me another and before i knew it was 2 am and i was under a table bein choked by a dude that smelled like a stable and finally i was able to throw him through the screen door pick up my hat off the hardwood floor get on back to the barkeep s daughter who was puttin pop a top on the jukebox dancin non stop and sippin on a beer that i bought her we were drinkin it like it was water there were cowgirls everywhere wearin their pretty hair down to their derriere and there were 2 more bottles of beer on the wall 2 more bottles of beer took one down and passed it around 1 more bottle of beer on the wall 1 more bottle of beer on the wall 1 more bottle of beer we raised it up high and drained it dry and there were no more bottles of beer on the wall so we started on the cuervo bacardi gold margaritas straight tequila jim beam george dickel then we wet our whistle with a single malt scotch peach schnapps in a jello shot captain morgan pour some more of them cider sliders flyin tigers dr pepper for the designated drivers everclear absolut and amaretto i don t remember much but i never will forget those 99 bottles of beer on the wall 99 bottles of beer there ain t nothin finer than an ice cold shiner and 99 bottles of beer on the wall