sharp and open leave me alone i m sleeping less every night as the days become heavier and weighted waiting in the cold light a noise a scream tears my clothes as the figurines tighten with spiders inside them and dust on the lips of a vision of hell i laughed in the mirror for the first time in a year a hundred other words blind me with your purity like an old painted doll in the throes of dance i think about tomorrow please let me sleep as i slip down the window freshly squashed fly you mean nothing you mean nothing i can lose myself in chinese art and american girls all the time lose me in the dark please do it right run into the night i will lose myself tomorrow crimson pain my heart explodes my memory in a fire someone will listen at least for a short while i can never say no to anyone but you too many secrets too many lies writhing with hatred too many secrets please make it good tonight with the same image haunts me in sequence despair of time i will never be clean again i touched her eyes pressed my stained face i will never be clean again touched her eyes press my stained face i will never be clean again i will never be clean again i will never be clean again i will never be clean again