mr maraczek you ve gotta stop thinking of me as just a delivery boy in a suit with a tie i look old and i ve been training myself to be a salesclerk training hard for two years you ve been training i have trained myself going shelf by shelf and i know every item in the store every tube jar box bottle carton and container where they are what they cost what they re for although it s something you have never thought about mr maraczek try me you need a man who knows the business inside out mr maraczek try me you need help or i d have never spoken and why break someone in when i m already broken in this emergency i wouldn t let you down mr maraczek try me oh i can see by the uncertain way you frown that you ask yourself why me for first class clerking and consciencious working mr maraczek why not try me alright this cream is sour very sour take it back you wish to return this jar madam certainly right you are madam you say it smells like a drownded cat oh it does at that at maraczek s madam we claim with pride the customer must be satisfied the customer must be satisfied by the way we have a special sale on autumn heather let me spray some on your hand here we ll smell it together  it has the three elements of good perfume attractive to the nose invisible to the eye and fuctional my wife has used it time and again it s very appealing to us men i use it myself every now and then i ll take it certainly madam oh miss ritter miss ritter thats twenty and six for the autumn heather eight and three for the cream thirty two even for that bottle of mermaids dream one and three for the eyebrow pencil nine for the large shampoo and then for the jar you re bringing back thats four and two for you that s a total of ninety eight less four and two for the jar out of a hundred cha ching here s your change five and two there you are the biggest sale in several years i believe thank you madam please call again glad i could help here is my card thank you madam please call again do call again madam i would glady grow a moustache if you like mr maraczek try me oh i would even think of giving up my bike mr maraczek try me for first class clerking and consciencious working mr maraczek why not try me 