there was a woman who was beautiful who started with all the advantages yet she had no luck she married for love and the love turned to dust she had bonny children yet she felt they had been thrust upon her and she could not love them they looked at her coldly as if they were finding fault with her and hurriedly she felt she must cover up some fault in herself yet what it was that she must cover up she never knew nevertheless when her children were present she always felt the centre of her heart go hard this troubled her and in her manner she was all the more gentle and anxious for her children as if she loved them very much only she herself knew that at the centre of her heart was a hard little place that could not feel love no not for anybody everybody else said of her she is such a good mother she adores her children only she herself and her children themselves knew it was not so they read it in each other s eyes there were a boy and two little girls they lived in a pleasant house with a garden and they had discreet servants and felt themselves superior to anyone in the neighbourhood although they lived in style they felt always an anxiety in the house there was never enough money the mother had a small income and the father had a small income but not nearly enough for the social position which they had to keep up the father went into town to some office but though he had good prospects these prospects never materialised there was always the grinding sense of the shortage of money though the style was always kept up at last the mother said i will see if i can t make something but she did not know where to begin she racked her brains and tried this thing and the other but could not find anything successful the failure made deep lines come into her face her children were growing up they would have to go to school there must be more money there must be more money the father who was always very handsome and expensive in his tastes seemed as if he never would be able to do anything worth doing and the mother who had a great belief in herself did not succeed any better and her tastes were just as expensive and so the house came to be haunted by the unspoken phrase there must be more money there must be more money the children could hear it all the time though nobody said it aloud they heard it at christmas when the expensive and splendid toys filled the nursery behind the shining modern rocking horse behind the smart doll s house a voice would start whispering there must be more money there must be more money and the children would stop playing to listen for a moment they would look into each other s eyes to see if they had all heard and each one saw in the eyes of the other two that they too had heard there must be more money there must be more money it came whispering from the springs of the still swaying rocking horse and even the horse bending his wooden champing head heard it the big doll sitting so pink and smirking in her new pram could hear it quite plainly and seemed to be smirking all the more self consciously because of it the foolish puppy too that took the place of the teddy bear he was looking so extraordinarily foolish for no other reason but that he heard the secret whisper all over the house there must be more money yet nobody ever said it aloud the whisper was everywhere and therefore no one spoke it just as no one ever says we are breathing in spite of the fact that breath is coming and going all the time mother said the boy paul one day why don t we keep a car of our own why do we always use uncle s or else a taxi because we re the poor members of the family said the mother but why are we mother well i suppose she said slowly and bitterly it s because your father has no luck the boy was silent for some time is luck money mother he asked rather timidly no paul not quite it s what causes you to have money oh said paul vaguely i thought when uncle oscar said filthy lucker it meant money filthy lucre does mean money said the mother but it s lucre not luck oh said the boy then what is luck mother it s what causes you to have money if you re lucky you have money that s why it s better to be born lucky than rich if you re rich you may lose your money but if you re lucky you will always get more money oh will you and is father not lucky very unlucky i should say she said bitterly the boy watched her with unsure eyes why he asked i don t know nobody ever knows why one person is lucky and another unlucky don t they nobody at all does nobody know perhaps god but he never tells he ought to then and are nt you lucky either mother i can t be it i married an unlucky husband but by yourself aren t you i used to think i was before i married now i think i am very unlucky indeed why well never mind perhaps i m not really she said the child looked at her to see if she meant it but he saw by the lines of her mouth that she was only trying to hide something from him well anyhow he said stoutly i m a lucky person why said his mother with a sudden laugh he stared at her he didn t even know why he had said it god told me he asserted brazening it out i hope he did dear she said again with a laugh but rather bitter he did mother excellent said the mother using one of her husband s exclamations the boy saw she did not believe him or rather that she paid no attention to his assertion this angered him somewhere and made him want to compel her attention he went off by himself vaguely in a childish way seeking for the clue to luck absorbed taking no heed of other people he went about with a sort of stealth seeking inwardly for luck he wanted luck he wanted it he wanted it when the two girls were playing dolls in the nursery he would sit on his big rocking horse charging madly into space with a frenzy that made the little girls peer at him uneasily wildly the horse careered the waving dark hair of the boy tossed his eyes had a strange glare in them the little girls dared not speak to him when he had ridden to the end of his mad little journey he climbed down and stood in front of his rocking horse staring fixedly into its lowered face its red mouth was slightly open its big eye was wide and glassy bright now he would silently command the snorting steed now take me to where there is luck now take me and he would slash the horse on the neck with the little whip he had asked uncle oscar for he knew the horse could take him to where there was luck if only he forced it so he would mount again and start on his furious ride hoping at last to get there you ll break your horse paul said the nurse he s always riding like that i wish he d leave off said his elder sister joan but he only glared down on them in silence nurse gave him up she could make nothing of him anyhow he was growing beyond her one day his mother and his uncle oscar came in when he was on one of his furious rides he did not speak to them hallo you young jockey riding a winner said his uncle aren t you growing too big for a rocking horse you re not a very little boy any longer you know said his mother but paul only gave a blue glare from his big rather close set eyes he would speak to nobody when he was in full tilt his mother watched him with an anxious expression on her face at last he suddenly stopped forcing his horse into the mechanical gallop and slid down well i got there he announced fiercely his blue eyes still flaring and his sturdy long legs straddling apart where did you get to asked his mother where i wanted to go he flared back at her that s right son said uncle oscar don t you stop till you get there what s the horse s name he doesn t have a name said the boy get s on without all right asked the uncle well he has different names he was called sansovino last week sansovino eh won the ascot how did you know this name he always talks about horse races with bassett said joan the uncle was delighted to find that his small nephew was posted with all the racing news bassett the young gardener who had been wounded in the left foot in the war and had got his present job through oscar cresswell whose batman he had been was a perfect blade of the turf he lived in the racing events and the small boy lived with him oscar cresswell got it all from bassett master paul comes and asks me so i can t do more than tell him sir said bassett his face terribly serious as if he were speaking of religious matters and does he ever put anything on a horse he fancies well i don t want to give him away he s a young sport a fine sport sir would you mind asking him himself he sort of takes a pleasure in it and perhaps he d feel i was giving him away sir if you don t mind bassett was serious as a church the uncle went back to his nephew and took him off for a ride in the car say paul old man do you ever put anything on a horse the uncle asked the boy watched the handsome man closely why do you think i oughtn t to he parried not a bit of it i thought perhaps you might give me a tip for the lincoln the car sped on into the country going down to uncle oscar s place in hampshire honour bright said the nephew honour bright son said the uncle well then daffodil daffodil i doubt it sonny what about mirza i only know the winner said the boy that s daffodil daffodil eh there was a pause daffodil was an obscure horse comparatively uncle yes son you won t let it go any further will you i promised bassett bassett be damned old man what s he got to do with it we re partners we ve been partners from the first uncle he lent me my first five shillings which i lost i promised him honour bright it was only between me and him only you gave me that ten shilling note i started winning with so i thought you were lucky you won t let it go any further will you the boy gazed at his uncle from those big hot blue eyes set rather close together the uncle stirred and laughed uneasily right you are son i ll keep your tip private how much are you putting on him all except twenty pounds said the boy i keep that in reserve the uncle thought it a good joke you keep twenty pounds in reserve do you you young romancer what are you betting then i m betting three hundred said the boy gravely but it s between you and me uncle oscar honour bright it s between you and me all right you young nat gould he said laughing but where s your three hundred bassett keeps it for me we re partner s you are are you and what is bassett putting on daffodil he won t go quite as high as i do i expect perhaps he ll go a hundred and fifty what pennies laughed the uncle pounds said the child with a surprised look at his uncle bassett keeps a bigger reserve than i do between wonder and amusement uncle oscar was silent he pursued the matter no further but he determined to take his nephew with him to the lincoln races now son he said i m putting twenty on mirza and i ll put five on for you on any horse you fancy what s your pick daffodil uncle no not the fiver on daffodil i should if it was my own fiver said the child good good right you are a fiver for me and a fiver for you on daffodil the child had never been to a race meeting before and his eyes were blue fire he pursed his mouth tight and watched a frenchman just in front had put his money on lancelot wild with excitement he flayed his arms up and down yelling lancelot lancelot in his french accent daffodil came in first lancelot second mirza third the child flushed and with eyes blazing was curiously serene his uncle brought him four five pound notes four to one what am i to do with these he cried waving them before the boys eyes i suppose we ll talk to bassett said the boy i expect i have fifteen hundred now and twenty in reserve and this twenty his uncle studied him for some moments look here son he said you re not serious about bassett and that fifteen hundred are you yes i am but it s between you and me uncle honour bright honour bright all right son but i must talk to bassett if you d like to be a partner uncle with bassett and me we could all be partners only you d have to promise honour bright uncle not to let it go beyond us three bassett and i are lucky and you must be lucky because it was your ten shillings i started winning with uncle oscar took both bassett and paul into richmond park for an afternoon and there they talked it s like this you see sir bassett said master paul would get me talking about racing events spinning yarns you know sir and he was always keen on knowing if i d made or if i d lost it s about a year since now that i put five shillings on blush of dawn for him and we lost then the luck turned with that ten shillings he had from you that we put on singhalese and since that time it s been pretty steady all things considering what do you say master paul we re all right when we re sure said paul it s when we re not quite sure that we go down oh but we re careful then said bassett but when are you sure smiled uncle oscar it s master paul sir said bassett in a secret religious voice it s as if he had it from heaven like daffodil now for the lincoln that was as sure as eggs did you put anything on daffodil asked oscar cresswell yes sir i made my bit and my nephew bassett was obstinately silent looking at paul i made twelve hundred didn t i bassett i told uncle i was putting three hundred on daffodil that s right said bassett nodding but where s the money asked the uncle i keep it safe locked up sir master paul he can have it any minute he likes to ask for it what fifteen hundred pounds and twenty and forty that is with the twenty he made on the course it s amazing said the uncle if master paul offers you to be partners sir i would if i were you if you ll excuse me said bassett oscar cresswell thought about it i ll see the money he said they drove home again and sure enough bassett came round to the garden house with fifteen hundred pounds in notes the twenty pounds reserve was left with joe glee in the turf commission deposit you see it s all right uncle when i m sure then we go strong for all we re worth don t we bassett we do that master paul and when are you sure said the uncle laughing oh well sometimes i m absolutely sure like about daffodil said the boy and sometimes i have an idea and sometimes i haven t even an idea have i bassett then we re careful because we mostly go down you do do you and when you re sure like about daffodil what makes you sure sonny oh well i don t know said the boy uneasily i m sure you know uncle that s all it s as if he had it from heaven sir bassett reiterated i should say so said the uncle but he became a partner and when the leger was coming on paul was sure about lively spark which was a quite inconsiderable horse the boy insisted on putting a thousand on the horse bassett went for five hundred and oscar cresswell two hundred lively spark came in first and the betting had been ten to one against him paul had made ten thousand you see he said i was absolutely sure of him even oscar cresswell had cleared two thousand look here son he said this sort of thing makes me nervous it needn t uncle perhaps i shan t be sure again for a long time but what are you going to do with your money asked the uncle of course said the boy i started it for mother she said she had no luck because father is unlucky so i thought if i was lucky it might stop whispering what might stop whispering our house i hate our house for whispering what does it whisper why why the boy fidgeted why i don t know but it s always short of money you know uncle i know it son i know it you know people send mother writs don t you uncle i m afraid i do said the uncle and then the house whispers like people laughing at you behind your back it s awful that is i thought if i was lucky you might stop it added the uncle the boy watched him with big blue eyes that had an uncanny cold fire in them and he said never a word well then said the uncle what are we doing i shouldn t like mother to know i was lucky said the boy why not son she d stop me i don t think she would oh and the boy writhed in an odd way i don t want her to know uncle all right son we ll manage it without her knowing they managed it very easily paul at the other s suggestion handed over five thousand pounds to his uncle who deposited it with the family lawyer who was then to inform paul s mother that a relative had put five thousand pounds into his hands which sum was to be paid out a thousand pounds at a time on the mother s birthday for the next five years so she ll have a birthday present of a thousand pounds for five successive years said uncle oscar i hope it won t make it all the harder for her later paul s mother had her birthday in november the house had been whispering worse than ever lately and even in spite of his luck paul could not bear up against it he was very anxious to see the effect of the birthday letter telling his mother about the thousand pounds when there were no visitors paul now took his meals with his parents as he was beyond the nursery control his mother went into town nearly every day she had discovered that she had an odd knack of sketching furs and dress materials so she worked secretly in the studio of a friend who was the chief artist for the leading drapers she drew the figures of ladies in furs and ladies in silk and sequins for the newspaper advertisements this young woman artist earned several thousand pounds a year but paul s mother only made several hundreds and she was again dissatisfied she so wanted to be first in something and she did not succeed even in making sketches for drapery advertisements she was down to breakfast on the morning of her birthday paul watched her face as she read her letters he knew the lawyer s letter as his mother read it her face hardened and became more expressionless then a cold determined look came on her mouth she hid the letter under the pile of others and said not a word about it didn t you have anything nice in the post for your birthday mother said paul quite moderately nice she said her voice cold and hard and absent she went away to town without saying more but in the afternoon uncle oscar appeared he said paul s mother had had a long interview with the lawyer asking if the whole five thousand could not be advanced at once as she was in debt what do you think uncle said the boy i leave it to you son oh let her have it then we can get some more with the other said the boy a bird in the hand is worth two in the bush laddie said uncle oscar but i m sure to know for the grand national or the lincolnshire or else the derby i m sure to know for one of them said paul so uncle oscar signed the agreement and paul s mother touched the whole five thousand then something very curious happened the voices in the house suddenly went mad like a chorus of frogs on a spring evening there were certain new furnishings and paul had a tutor he was really going to eton his father s school in the following autumn there were flowers in the winter and a blossoming of the luxury paul s mother had been used to and yet the voices in the house behind the sprays of mimosa and almond blossom and from under the piles of iridescent cushions simply trilled and screamed in a sort of ecstasy there must be more money oh h h there must be more money oh now now w now w w there must be more money more than ever more than ever it frightened paul terribly he studied away at his latin and greek with his tutor but his intense hours were spent with bassett the grand national had gone by he had not known and had lost a hundred pounds summer was at hand he was in agony for the lincoln but even for the lincoln he didn t know and he lost fifty pounds he became wild eyed and strange as if something were going to explode in him let it alone son don t you bother about it urged uncle oscar but it was as if the boy couldn t really hear what his uncle was saying i ve got to know for the derby i ve got to know for the derby the child reiterated his big blue eyes blazing with a sort of madness his mother noticed how overwrought he was you d better go to the seaside wouldn t you like to go now to the seaside instead of waiting i think you d better she said looking down at him anxiously her heart curiously heavy because of him but the child lifted his uncanny blue eyes i couldn t possibly go before the derby mother he said i couldn t possibly why not she said her voice becoming heavy when she was opposed why not you can still go from the seaside to see the derby with your uncle oscar if that that s what you wish no need for you to wait here besides i think you care too much about these races it s a bad sign my family has been a gambling family and you won t know till you grow up how much damage it has done but it has done damage i shall have to send bassett away and ask uncle oscar not to talk racing to you unless you promise to be reasonable about it go away to the seaside and forget it you re all nerves i ll do what you like mother so long as you don t send me away till after the derby the boy said send you away from where just from this house yes he said gazing at her why you curious child what makes you care about this house so much suddenly i never knew you loved it he gazed at her without speaking he had a secret within a secret something he had not divulged even to bassett or to his uncle oscar but his mother after standing undecided and a little bit sullen for some moments said very well then don t go to the seaside till after the derby if you don t wish it but promise me you won t think so much about horse racing and events as you call them oh no said the boy casually i won t think much about them mother you needn t worry i wouldn t worry mother if i were you if you were me and i were you said his mother i wonder what we should do but you know you needn t worry mother don t you the boy repeated i should be awfully glad to know it she said wearily oh well you can you know i mean you ought to know you needn t worry he insisted ought i then i ll see about it she said paul s secret of secrets was his wooden horse that which had no name since he was emancipated from a nurse and a nursery governess he had had his rocking horse removed to his own bedroom at the top of the house surely you re too big for a rocking horse his mother had remonstrated well you see mother till i can have a real horse i like to have some sort of animal about had been his quaint answer do you feel he keeps you company she laughed oh yes he s very good he always keeps me company when i m there said paul so the horse rather shabby stood in an arrested prance in the boy s bedroom the derby was drawing near and the boy grew more and more tense he hardly heard what was spoken to him he was very frail and his eyes were really uncanny his mother had sudden strange seizures of uneasiness about him sometimes for half an hour she would feel a sudden anxiety about him that was almost anguish she wanted to rush to him at once and know he was safe two nights before the derby she was at a big party in town when one of her rushes of anxiety about her boy her first born gripped her heart till she could hardly speak she fought with the feeling might and main for she believed in common sense but it was too strong she had to leave the dance and go downstairs to telephone to the country the children s nursery governess was terribly surprised and startled at being rung up in the night are the children all right miss wilmot oh yes they are quite all right master paul is he all right he went to bed as right as a trivet shall i run up and look at him no said paul s mother reluctantly no don t trouble it s all right don t sit up we shall be home fairly soon she did not want her son s privacy intruded upon very good said the governess it was about one o clock when paul s mother and father drove up to their house all was still paul s mother went to her room and slipped off her white fur cloak she had told her maid not to wait up for her she heard her husband downstairs mixing a whisky and soda and then because of the strange anxiety at her heart she stole upstairs to her son s room noiselessly she went along the upper corridor was there a faint noise what was it she stood with arrested muscles outside his door listening there was a strange heavy and yet not loud noise her heart stood still it was a soundless noise yet rushing and powerful something huge in violent hushed motion what was it what in god s name was it she ought to know she felt that she knew the noise she knew what it was yet she could not place it she couldn t say what it was and on and on it went like a madness softly frozen with anxiety and fear she turned the door handle the room was dark yet in the space near the window she heard and saw something plunging to and fro she gazed in fear and amazement then suddenly she switched on the light and saw her son in his green pyjamas madly surging on the rocking horse the blaze of light suddenly lit him up as he urged the wooden horse and lit her up as she stood blonde in her dress of pale green and crystal in the doorway paul she cried whatever are you doing it s malabar he screamed in a powerful strange voice it s malabar his eyes blazed at her for one strange and senseless second as he ceased urging his wooden horse then he fell with a crash to the ground and she all her tormented motherhood flooding upon her rushed to gather him up but he was unconscious and unconscious he remained with some brain fever he talked and tossed and his mother sat stonily by his side malabar it s malabar bassett bassett i know it s malabar so the child cried trying to get up and urge the rocking horse that gave him his inspiration what does he mean by malabar asked the heart frozen mother i don t know said the father stonily what does he mean by malabar she asked her brother oscar it s one of the horses running for the derby was the answer and in spite of himself oscar cresswell spoke to bassett and himself put a thousand on malabar at fourteen to one the third day of the illness was critical they were waiting for a change the boy with his rather long curly hair was tossing ceaselessly on the pillow he neither slept nor regained consciousness and his eyes were like blue stones his mother sat feeling her heart had gone turned actually into a stone in the evening oscar cresswell did not come but bassett sent a message saying could he come up for one moment just one moment paul s mother was very angry at the intrusion but on second thoughts she agreed the boy was the same perhaps bassett might bring him to consciousness the gardener a shortish fellow with a little brown moustache and sharp little brown eyes tiptoed into the room touched his imaginary cap to paul s mother and stole to the bedside staring with glittering smallish eyes at the tossing dying child master paul he whispered master paul malabar came in first all right a clean win i did as you told me you ve made over seventy thousand pounds you have you ve got over eighty thousand malabar came in all right master paul malabar malabar did i say malabar mother did i say malabar do you think i m lucky mother i knew malabar didn t i over eighty thousand pounds i call that lucky don t you mother over eighty thousand pounds i knew didn t i know i knew malabar came in all right if i ride my horse till i m sure then i tell you bassett you can go as high as you like did you go for all you were worth bassett i went a thousand on it master paul i never told you mother that if i can ride my horse and get there then i m absolutely sure oh absolutely mother did i ever tell you i am lucky no you never did said his mother but the boy died in the night and even as he lay dead his mother heard her brother s voice saying to her my god hester you re eighty odd thousand to the good and a poor devil of a son to the bad but poor devil poor devil he s best gone out of a life where he rides his rocking horse to find a winner 