i had sex on christmas i had sex three times today three different women taught me how to be bored in their own separate sweet little ways i feel like hell on christmas and i feel like hell today i feel like hell when i wake up i can tell that i m never gonna make you stay okay here it goes i didn t get no presents on christmas and i sure didn t get none today learned my lesson life is one long session of disappointment heartache pain disappointment heartache pain and despair