in your little black book you ve got the names and the favourite persuasions of the people in the headlines i m in there under a and i m rated under b you ve got photographs to prove it and i swear to god it s not me you ve got a hard heart being hard is your art you think love is a dirty dirty word you pick up the phone and you ring me when i m at home and then you put it down and i m reaching for my valium my secret life living life on a knife edge of life tell my wife and she s just had a breakdown and i i m not rich but you know i m top in my pitch and you ll ruin the lot finish everything i ve got my secret life secret life  i ll give you anything anything to shut you up why do you hate me so much what have i ever done to you but leave you i don t want to play cat and mouse have the neighbours looking over at my house all the secret smiles when i walk in the room and i think i m going to crack up soon i m going to run away find a place in the dark where i don t have to hear the nasty nasty talk change my sex change my hair be hard to find anywhere my secret life living life on a knife edge of life tell my wife and she s just had a breakdown and i i m not rich but you know i m top in my pitch and you ll ruin the lot finish everything i ve got my secret life secret life ll give you anything anything to shut you up why do you hate me so much what have i ever done to you but leave you my secret life my secret life my secret life my secret life my secret life