ill hold my own death as a card in the deck to be played when there are no other cards left ill slip into the ocean unnoticed and notify no one on a notarized form enter slow on a hot summer morning like that one legged locksmith in cold rain but ill hold my own death as a card in the deck to be played when there are no other cards left as time drags on and i thin and whiten and my beard grows long i might look like walt whitman all sunken eyed and dry and without pigment but i want to be spry as a newborn kitten and ill hold my own death as a card in the deck to be played when there are no other cards left i want to open like the bay does to the ocean with an equal portion of every emotion or soldier forward and be hard as a flat board with the heart of an approaching asteroid let go and ride like a cats toy in a dryer stay true to my matter like a brick in fire wrapped in my long years like a spool of wire unspoiled by the foils of fame and desire so ill hold my own death as a card in the deck to be played when there are no other cards left hold my own death as a card in the deck