i m on drugs i m uh i mean you know what it is what s the deal man i like to get small it s a wild wild drug very dangerous for kids though because they get really small i know i shouldn t get small when i m drivin but uh i was drivin around the other day you know and a cop pulls me over and he goes hey are you small i said no i m tall i m tall he said well i m gonna have to measure you they ve got a little test they give you it s a balloon and if you can get inside of it they know you re small and they can t put you in a regular cell either because you walk right out one night i got really small ok i dont like to gear my material to the audience but id like to make an exception because i was told that there is a convention of plumbers in san francisco this week i understand about 30 of them came down to the show tonight so before i came out i worked up a joke especially for the plumbers those of you who arent plumbers probably wont get this and wont think its funny but i think those of you who are plumbers will really enjoy this this lawn supervisor was out on a sprinkler maintenance job and he started working on a findlay sprinkler head with a langstrom 7 inch gangly wrench just then this little apprentice leaned over and said you cant work on a findlay sprinkler head with a langstrom 7 inch wrench well this infuriated the supervisor so he went and got volume 14 of the kinsley manual and he reads to him and says the langstrom 7 inch wrench can be used with the findlay sprocket just then the little apprentice leaned over and said it says sprocket not socket were these plumbers supposed to be here this show or okay well i think we re having fun now sure i m pissed you just can t sing a depressing song when you re playing the banjo you just can t go oh death and grief and sorrow and murder when you re playing the banjo everything s ok hey steve your house is burning down i always thought the banjo was the one thing that coulda saved nixon if he went on television at just the right time and went hi everything s great i think it would have been great if he d been traveling around the country and got off the plane and said i d like to talk about politics but first a little foggy mountain breakdown 