when i was nine i learned survival taught myself not to care i was my single good companion taking my comfort there up in my room i planned my conquests on my own never asked for a helping hand no one would understand i never asked the pair who fought below just in case they said no pity the child who has ambition knows what he wants to do knows that he ll never fit the system others expect him to pity the child who knew his parents saw their faults saw their love die before his eyes pity the child that wise he never asked did i cause your distress just in case they said yes when i was twelve my father moved out left with a whimper not with a shout i didn t miss him he made it perfectly clear i was a fool and probably queer fool that i was i thought this would bring those he had left closer together well she made her move the moment he crawled away i was the last the woman told she never let her bed get cold someone moved in i shut my door someone to treat her just the same way as before i took the road of least resistance i had my game to play i had the skill and more the hunger easy to get away pity the child with no such weapons no defence no escape from the ties that bind always a step behind i never called to tell her all i d done i was only her son pity the child but not forever not if he stays that way he can get all he ever wanted if he s prepared to pay pity instead the careless mother what she missed what she lost when she let me go i wonder does she know i wouldn t call a crazy thing to do just in case she said who 