i woke up at seven and my body was vibrating i was wrapped up in a blanket i was gray damp and sore the bedroom was an engine and my heartbeat was erratic like i think i m at the racing like the night before i remember one girl standing one was sitting on the ground one was holding me up the other pulling me down and i couldn t decide which one was real because there wasn t a sound like i was pregnant again i woke up at seven and my body was vibrating i was wrapped up in a blanket i was gray damp and sore the bedroom was an engine and my heartbeat was erratic like i think i m at the racing like the night before don t move don t smile don t blink don t even breathe and she said or the photograph will spoil and cut you off at the head so i was sucking i was sucking like a fat lady would but i couldn t hold it down another second don t twitch don t shout don t think don t even breathe she said or the photograph will spoil and cut you off at the head so i was sweating i was sweating like a fat lady would and i woke up with a man inside my mouth this won t hurt at all