and i grew up on alcoholic evenings and slow jazz music to keep my heart beating because after all that happens in a dissolving family the need for a song to sing me to sleep still rings true and i always knew that there wasn t glue strong enough to sew these roots together and now that i ve wasted too many years and i ve lost track of where i started i have to dream at night of who i was and why after twenty years of marriage i am what is left and i d like to go back now and make myself up because i d be a brick so i wouldn t feel and i d lift myself up i d throw myself at this house to break windows smash walls just to keep time where it was and where it should be