what do you want from life to kidnap an heiress or threaten her with a knife what do you want from life to get cable tv and watch it every night there you sit a lump in your chair where do you sleep and what do you wear when you re sleeping what do you want from life an indian guru to show you the inner light what do you want from life a meaningless love affair with a girl that you met tonight how can you tell when you re doin alright does your bank account swell while you re dreaming at night how do you know when you re really in love do violins play when you re touching the one that you re loving what do you want from life someone to love and somebody you can trust what do you want from life to try and be happy while you do the nasty things you must what do you want from life what do you want from life what do you want from life what do you want from life well you can t have that but if you re an american citizen you are entitled to a heated kidney shaped pool a microwave oven don t watch the food cook a dyna gym i ll personally demonstrate it in the privacy of your own home a kingsize titanic unsinkable molly brown waterbed with polybendum a foolproof plan and an airtight alibi real simulated indian jewelry a gucci shoetree a year s supply of antibiotics a personally autographed picture of randy mantooth and bob dylan s new unlisted phone number a beautifully restored 3rd reich swizzle stick rosemary s baby a dream date in kneepads with paul williams a new matador a new mastadon a maverick a mustang a montego a merc montclair a mark iv a meteor a mercedes an mg or a malibu a mort moriarty a maserati a mac truck a mazda a new monza or a moped a winnebago hell a herd of winnebago s we re giving em away or how about a mcculloch chainsaw a las vegas wedding a mexican divorce a solid gold kama sutra coffee pot or a baby s arm holding an apple 