we measure things by what we are to the maggots in the cheese the cheese is the universe to the worms in the corpse the corpse is the cosmos how then can we be so cock sure about our world just because of our telescopes microscopes and the splitting of the atom certainly not science is but an organized system of ignorance there are more things in heaven and on earth that are dreamt of in your philosophy what do we know about the beyond do we know whats behind the beyond i m afraid some of us hardly know whats beyond the behind fuck damnit another halloween people on military know what this means houses on fire they re blowin up cars creatures in the streets and razor blades in candy bars i went to trick or treat the first house on my block spit in my face and gave me a rock i tried to give it back and said i ll take nothing instead turned around and walked away and felt the rock peg me in the head walked to the next house directly next door there i saw an old lady dead on the floor i said excuse me miss but do you have a treat she lifted her leg and scraped flakes off her dead feet i ran to the next house happy and giddy and there i seen a fat woman holding up her titty i said trick or treat she sad treat or trick and squeezed on her titty until it fuck it it s too sick next house up was sittin back in the woods i was a lil frightened but fuck i want the goods i knocked on the door i heard a knock back and then i heard come in and yo i m like fuck that this house belongs to miss cherry spoon she said drop your drawers and your treat is coming soon i quickly grew a stiffy but kept my eyes shut a hand came out the mail chute and flicked me in the nuts i wobbled to the next house ready for the worst and chillin in the drive was a long black hearse i rang the door bell and said is anybody home of course little boy have a sugar coated kidney stone i walked through the field and to the next crib it s friendly mrs wetherbee in her cooking bib i said how bout some candy she said how bout instead a nice hot fresh home made loaf of yeast infection bread my bag s gettin heavy so i rest on the curb and riding on his bike here comes little larry sherb i snuck up behind him and kicked him off his seat i punched him in the neck and powerbombed him in the street now my bag of candy has doubled in size up to the next house for my scary prize i m like trick or treat trick treat tricky dick he opened up his door slapped my lips and didn t give me shit rock through his window and ran across the street to the big mansion i m in for a treat i dinged on the dong and here comes the butler a big gumpy tall ass lurch lookin motherfucker i said hello mr is there somethin for my sack he reached in his pocket but i think he hurt his back it s taking him an hour my bag is open ready but then he finally dropped it in my sack a fucking penny the next house is abandoned so forget it but wait a minute i think somebody s livin in it i ran up to the door trick or treat you can t hide it was a crackhead he crawled in my bag and died the next house is mine the last on the block my mother s sitting on the porch shining up her glock i climbed on the roof with my brother jump steady and we yelled happy halloween and clown love to the whole city 1