i get a pool full of liquor and i die in it you pour me a rum coke you better put a fucking lime in it i m harvey pekar if he could rap though louis ck another disgruntled asshole so please excuse the rudeness and demeanor i m more eeyore than christian dior i haven t had a new look since the 90s if i need clothes then kohl s is where you ll find me my apartment functions as a dungeon curmudgeon don t invite me to your functions i can t stand introductions phone calls get ducked and voicemails fuck them nothing i like my friday nights with no interruption and hold the compliments don t have any confidence drinking every night cuz i don t have any accomplishments started from the bottom and i ll stay there never play the game cuz they don t play fair i appreciate the help i don t need nobody else let me party by myself bitch don t kill my vibe bitch don t kill my vibe how am i supposed to live i gotta work to stay alive i m not an open book i m a bottle on the shelf to love health and wealth bitch i party by myself tonight i m staying in the house probably laying on the couch don t mistake what i m about bitch i pour an ipa into my mouth fuck fame i d rather be a face up in the crowd a trip to the liquor store will be tonight s highlight i don t pop molly bitch i drink miller high life that chick reminds you of your bimmer she reminds me of the time the heat went out in my lumina i got my darling cooking dinner while i m talking shit on twitter steady sipping on this liquor probably fucking up my liver you might think that i m a sinner but i think i beg to differ on the weekends not trying to get on guest lists i m taking your suggestions for shit to watch on netflix but i m too drunk to watch a movie it s friday night i m passing out watching louie  started from the bottom and i ll stay there never play the game cuz they don t play fair i appreciate the help i don t need nobody else let me party by myself bitch don t kill my vibe bitch don t kill my vibe how am i supposed to live i gotta work to stay alive i m not an open book i m a bottle on the shelf to love health and wealth bitch i party by myself i don t suppose it has anything to do with your winning personality does it that s what i m selling that s what i m selling is you that s right you re the commodity that s right1