close your eyes this may hurt a lot i ve learned to control my thoughts ever since i recognized the first eavesdropper those who listen in on my thoughts my logic my sanity i cannot let them know i don t know the verses or converse in my head lash out at future foes banter with friends i ve not yet met the psychoaggressive minions of your lord mock with laugher i can t hear with hidden scowls they admonish me nothing s sacred nothing s safe your filthy god is omnipresent this undying nonentity that haunts my every waking dream they watch me his mortal flock they know me now by sight alone my thoughts are too well concealed yet i sense more scrutiny fleeting lucidity s too loud for me let me be my silent self our existences irreconciled make them stop i m rotting fast the answer painful though it may be is change alter my outer shell the listener s may not then know it s me open face surgery short of pain and long on masquerade ounce by ounce lose a little weight nip here tuck there so who needs eyelids 