well me and bobby ray was goin down to a pickup joint just outside of town you know a metting market where you pick up chicks well knowing bobby ray as i do he ll be goin home alone before the night is through he s just too darn picky he s always wantin to score big well i m not leavin here alone i m gonna compromise early on yea i m goin ugly early tonight she may not be a beauty queen but thats alright i m not waitin round for one that looks good in the light i m goin ugly early tonight so bobby i says please dont stare but check them 2 out standin over there he says you mean the good lookin blonde and the one with the big zits i says yea thats right and heres my plan im not goin for miss scandinavian her chubby lil friend well thats my pick you can drink them cute but not skinny you get too picky you ain t gettin any so im goin ugly early tonight she may not be a beauty queen but thats alright i m not waitin round for on who looks good in the light im goin ugly early tonight then all of a sudden to my suprise the pretty one was givin me the eye and i was fixin to move up from a 2 to a 10 she said you know i dont live to far from here i ll get my purse and you pay for them beers and i was feelin pretty puffed up til she turned to her friend i guess she didn t i d here them hurtful words she whispered in little chubby s ear yea im goin ugly early tonight his friend is better lookin but i ain t got the time i m not waitin round for one that looks good in the light she sed im goin ugly early tonight you know she really hurt my pride but way down deep inside im glad shes goin ugly tonight 