maria maria maria see maria always wanted to compete my best friend though she always tried to outdo young na tee she flashed it the bitch was massive i m sitting past it engagement ring a couple karats discussing marriage since middle school we both got ridiculed by our peers until our titties and rears started to grow in the mirrors shared secrets fears shed clothes shed tears when her daddy died i told her mine had been dead for years like a sister to me so i guess she thought i was hatin when she got engaged to that dog nigga she datin i call him satan but pardon that you can call him black was a harlem cat a baller cat used to ball up crack that ain t all the facts nice house in the cul de sac but the talk is dead deep down he was an awful cat and i told her but maria got colder as we got older her daddy od d on rock so that left one on her shoulder one as big as a boulder so any nigga that showed up in her life ain t no thinking twice she was thinking wife are you thinking right if so you got my wishes if not don t call me when he fuckin with them other bitches she called me jealous i felt i wasn t she yelling that i was just mad cuz i ain t snag a husband ok that does it get the fuck out don t call me with that maid of honor shit you prima donna bitch acting like you lackin common sense hadn t been round her since it s been some years now that s why i can t believe i m in here wiping tears now in the bathroom what s gon happen to her kid now wait let me rewind it my train of thought let me find it damn got a little ahead of myself there aight bring it back i got it word on the street is maria got a jeep one day i saw her at the light kid in the baby seat petty we ain t even speak shit i felt a little hurt ex best friend and i didn t even know she gave birth she just smirked shit i know black got that work and i heard she walk around with a few thousand in her purse meanwhile i m public housing no lou bout ins sittin at the bus stop poutin cuz my car broke but she pose to be a fuckin star tho is what i heard maria said in the hood it crushed my ego she sped off i uttered you gon see ho years later i m moving major hard to get the hood to simmer down since they heard i run with russell simmons now spinning round blocks windows tinted as i pulled up to the light and my window got a knock from a young kid he looked like he was 7 or 8 as i handed him a 10 i got to stare in his face he ran back to this woman with a basket in an alley with a mattress it hurt my heart to see all this shit happen so i parked and grabbed two 100s as i walked up to this woman dirty as hell and smelled i was wearing chanel gave her the cash and bailed that was the plan until i heard her say na tee you was right bout that man goddamn it s maria it fucked me up to see her although we had our differences it hurt my heart to witness this i cried told her her son to hop in the ride didn t know where i was headed i just threw it in drive tears fell from my eyes as i heard her describe how she got pregnant for black and he introduced her to crack he used to beat her so bad and she decided to pack for the last year and a half she had been working the trap and all i could do is stare at the kid in the back it crushed my spirit just hearing that he was living through that fuck what you heard that s my nigga that s my nerve she s forgiven for that time back when she left me on that curb told her selling her body isn t something she deserved and i know her well enough to know it s not what she preferred i m contemplating should i offer up my guest room or will i wake up with shit missing out my next room should i be the friend she never was to me or should i have left her like when she left me in that jeep fuck it my thinking gave her more franklins pulled up in my neighborhood made it my mission to make sure this lady and her baby good she saw my house and started sobbing out loud told me she always knew i d make it i m making her proud next morning i m yawning went to check if she straight saw her son was asleep i m guessing she was awake she was nowhere in sight but i saw the bathroom light i knocked said maria did you sleep well thru the night no answer i knock again i m not convinced this bitch don t hear me a few more knocks and i got weary i opened the door she was hanging from the ceiling i dropped to the floor i can t describe what i was feeling saw a note on the sink it said dear na tee my son deserves to be raised by someone like you not me why me you forgave me yesterday you could ve played me and i only grabbed this rope cuz i m doing this for my baby goodbye 