ladies and gentlemen cameron esposito portland how are you please hear it for she was amazing uh it is great to see you guys great to see you you look amazing i also look amazing and i i notice some of you are takin in my look so i will answer a couple of questions you might have in you minds um yeah lets start right up top as you can tell by my haircut i am a thundercat and also a giant lesbian of course i am of course i am of course i am i have a side mullet i look like most of portland s men when i was walking on stage not too long ago and before i even hit the mic before i even hit the mic this dude sittin in the front row he just yells out at me you look like a woman who doesn t sleep with men he yelled that at me like as if i don t know he yelled that at me like as if i was gonna like what do ya mean is it the vest he yelled that at me like i grew up on a gay island with a gay volleyball and i d never seen a straight person he yelled that at me like i thought it was gonna be a surprise and an insult now here s the thing i look like a woman who doesn t sleep with men because i am a lesbian and that s one of the biggest parts not sleeping with men that s one of the biggest parts of being a lesbian and if your a lesbian you re not bummed about it i cannot tell you this strongly enough like this look this is on purpose to attract women so if you re guy out there and you re like i m not sure if i m into that to you i say sir there is no chance that you are less into me than i am into you