im doing what i love so why do i feel empty if gods a betting man well then i guess he bet against me my dads a prick why am i bitter that he left me getting older isnt easy no one asked if i was ready i fill my time with these extravagant distractions searching for fulfillment but so far that hasnt happened i was sober for four years i did a backflip off that wagon living fast to die young so ashtin cant regret his actions lately its been so insane fuck with girls dont know their names i hope and pray to gods i dont believe in that my soul is saved showing no restraint my shoulders holding so much weight but these arms strong call billie joe saint jimmy needs his novacaine these kids see me as someone that they relate to they tell me that my music gives them somewhere to escape to ive made a haven for these strangers brains to stay in but its funny i use music to medicate too im no celebrity im just a human being im scared of spiders and dying and people leaving behind the mask there s a kid crying and screaming in a hospital bed whose father wouldnt come out and fucking see him im a living breathing person who wears his heart on a sleeve and that hearts still beating sometimes its hard to believe if the music that i make can just offer you some relief i can sleep knowing life ain t as horrible as it seems would you give up everything you know to make it i came a long way from spitting writtens in my basement what happens if i blow up and get famous but i hate it i thought i wanted this i cant afford to be mistaken cause all these risks im taking are taking tolls on my mind now im at a point thats crucial i gotta stay on my grind put my heart in my music leave all that i know behind its unexplored territory i hope i like what i find whos even writing this ashtin or jeremy i dont know and that thought s kinda scaring me think about a year from now i really wonder where ill be i treat this music like its therapy cause musics always been there for me music never laughed at me music never shot me down music only empowered me music always had my back when everyone abandoned me when i was down music picked me up and fucking carried me when i was at my lowest and felt like nobody cared for me sitting in a hospital bed music was there for me trapped in my own head certain that itd be the death of me it was music that came and set me free yeah