my wife woke me up 4 00 in the morning she said i want you to go downstairs and cook breakfast for the children and i looked at the clock and i said dear it s 6 00 in the morning she said exactly go down and cook for the children they have to go to school i said yes but to eat at 6 00 isn t that bad for your stomach i mean they just ate twelve hours ago my wife said bill get out of that bed and go downstairs and cook breakfast for your children i said well i don t know what they want to eat she said it s down there now you get out of the bed and i said but where are the pans do we have pans to cook with she said bill i m not talking to you anymore you ask another stupid question so help me god i ll get the shotgun out of the closet and blow your face off i said well there s no need to become violent about this you seem to be having trouble intellectualizing on where the cooking apparel is so i fell back to sleep again the next thing i knew there was a bucket of ice water being shaken over my head and this woman that i ve been married to for some 17 years was standing over me like this now you get up and cook some breakfast or you re gonna wear this bucket of ice water so i said you re serious aren t you so i got up needless to say i was angry and i went downstairs without putting on my robe standing there in my pajamas and i m talking to myself i said get these go down and cook breakfast but it s six o clock in the morning and i slam the pans down blam on the stove i slam them down and go to the refrigerator and look around and i get to the damn bacon and the sausage cooking breakfast six o blam in the morning and i grab the you have to be careful with eggs god i have to cook breakfast boom i turn around the first one down was the four year old the child looked lovely cute little face clean hair in little braids little things you know good morn daddy and i said what do you want for breakfast the four year old has the ability to see through and find the wrong thing the child saw through my body what was behind me she saw the chocolate cake she said can i have the chocolate cake and i said chocolate cake where she said chocolate cake behind you and i looked and there was chocolate cake the child wanted chocolate cake for breakfast how ridiculous and i said and someone in my brain looked under chocolate cake and saw the ingredients eggs eggs are in chocolate cake and milk oh goody and wheat that s nutrition what do you want can i have some chocolate cake chocolate cake coming up sliced it for her and served it now you need something to drink with the chocolate cake something breakfast grapefruit juice no o o this is not your child so i give the child a glass of grapefruit juice and chocolate cake nutrition eggs milk and wheat in the chocolate cake and i didn t have to cook and the other four came downstairs and when they came downstairs those of you who have children you ve seen them come downstairs for school and they got to the kitchen they saw the four year old eating chocolate cake and they said dad where did she get the chocolate cake and they went to the child and said how did you get chocolate cake she said dad give me chocolate cake and they looked at me and said father could we have chocolate cake and their father said chocolate cake coming up four slices and grapefruit juice and five children sat at breakfast and the morning music was playing and they were eating chocolate cake and singing songs to me dad is great give us the chocolate cake and we had a ball until she came down like this and when she saw what the children were eating i ve always heard about people having a conniption but i ve never seen one you don t want to see em my wife s face split the skin and hair split and came off of her face so that there was nothing except the skull and orange light came out of her hair and it lit all around and fire shot from her eye sockets and began to burn my stomach and she said where did they get chocolate cake from and i said they asked for it and the children who had been singing praises to me lied on me and said uh uhh we asked for eggs and milk and dad made us eat this and my wife sent me to my room which is where i wanted to go in the first place so you see we are dumb but we are not so dumb it takes great thinking and work to keep from working 