i know you and i ll agree what this world needs is a lot more me well i have got the remedy gonna write my autobiography i ve led a fascinating life had a husband and a wife but you will truly be amazed at just how humble i have stayed enough about me let s talk about you what do you think of me you must feel such gratitude that you will get to read my autobiography my life doesn t have a very good plot guess i ll have to lie a lot should be easy to make things up there s no one left to call my bluff a lot of my old friends have passed on the rest did drugs and their memory s gone so i ll write my own history in my autobiography i ll say i slept with a kennedy don t remember which one they all looked the same to me or they did when we got done maybe they ll film it for tv i wonder who they ll cast as me should be somebody i look like sigourney weaver d be all right gonna be hard to deal with fame once the whole world knows my name but i ll stay humble and grateful to all the little people like you  a thousand pages more of me and all i ve seen and done it will be my legacy and that s just volume one of my autobiography