who s that alley cat scratchin in the trashcan come on get your feet off the bed everyone s goin to the one way rag poppa put your shoes on can t dance with the blues on come on get yourself in drag everyone s goin to the one way rag no two ways about it you don have to shout and scream about it ain t gonna listen to my neighbours gonna get in my car and step on the gas ain t no fastback s gonna get past me no to the one way rag feel the one way clown turn your face upside down get out of that lonesome bag everyone s gone to the one way rag