on a chicken farm just downstream of oak ridge tennessee a nuclear reactor leaked some water accidentally what happened next is like a horror story by ralph nader that toxic waste leaked into a brood house incubator inside that chicken coop they always kept the tv on said the programs helped the chicks to grow helped to keep them calm as four little chickens put that heavy water down their gullets a kung fu show was on the air and something happened to those pullets they began to grow and grow with that kung fu show locked in they re brain that s the only way we can explain teenage mutant kung fu chickens big as a house strong as the dickens anything they want is easy pickin s for teenage mutant kung fu chickens one said his name was fricassee the second cordon bleu the third was cacciatore the fourth they just called stew they could ve been dangerous having grown so big on heavy water but they decided they would live their lives on the side of law and order teenage mutant kung fu roosters bad guys won t have it easy like they usedters they come with tae kwon do and all the fixings they re teenage mutant kung fu chickens yeah we was just all down there at the barn holdin the auction so we wouldn t lose the farm when all of a sudden these four big pullets with black scarves around their foreheads come on down that hill yonder surrounded them bankers pecked them on the head and dropped them like green persimmons he he yeah then they went down there to the bottom forty start scratchin around like chickens just want to do before you know it they play out that whole field ready for plantin yeah they saved our farm aheh teenage mutant kung fu chickens big as a house strong as the dickens anything they want is easy pickin s for teenage mutant kung fu chickens teenage mutant kung fu chickens hey cock a doodle dude 