I want to reset my goddamn user profile key
I'm on it! I can understand your frustration and urgency in wanting to reset your user profile key. Rest assured, I'm here to help you through the process. 

To reset your user profile key, please follow these steps:

1. Access the "{{Profile Settings}}" section of your account.
2. Look for the "{{Security}}" or "{{Password}}" tab and click on it.
3. You should see an option to reset your user profile key. Click on it.
4. You may be prompted to verify your identity through a secondary method, such as your email address or phone number.
5. Once your identity is verified, you'll be able to set a new user profile key of your choice.

If you encounter any difficulties or have further questions, don't hesitate to reach out to our customer support team for personalized assistance. We're here to ensure a smooth and secure experience for you.