divorce i deleted much of the following article in order to discuss the specific issue of whether it is acceptable to divorce in article may athos rutgers edu crs carson u washington edu cliff slaughterbeck writes along the way she was married happily to a wonderful and supportive husband and gave birth to two sons still everything was not perfect for jane since she could never open up the deepest part of her soul to her husband she always found that she could be much closer to her women friends than to her husband as good and loing as a husband as he might be she struggled very much with this until at the age of she decided that she was a lesbian when she came home to announce this understanding of herself her husband told her that he had come to the same understanding several years before and was waiting for her to come to that realization in her own time her children ages and at the time were also extremely supportive of her as the youngest put it that just means that you love people very much jane and her husband agreed to divorce but remain friends and still consider each other as part of the extended family to this day one of the interesting things that jane said in this whole discussion was homosexuality is not about what goes on in the bedroom she found that she was much more able to have a deep committed relationship with a woman than a man sex in her mind is only a part of the whole relationship the key thing is how one interconnects with other people she made a specific point to say that it was not that she had never met a good man since she was married to a wonderful man for a dozen years take a few seconds and honestly ponder that thought and it s implications i have thought about the implications and it is scary we have a whole generation of families broken up because some men have decided that is is okay to leave their wives and children for the thrill of a younger more attractive woman if we accept that it is legitimate for jane to have divorced how can we not accept anyone s decision to divorce because he has found someone with whom he can have a more deep committed relationship marriage is not a state of being it is a mutual journey in life love is not a passive feeling it must be actively willed is it acceptable for an older executive to dump his wife of many years who stayed home to care for the children because he can t be happy sexually unless he is with a beautiful young blonde the real solution for both in the couple to make a renewed effort hold fast to the faith has not the lord repeatedly compared his relation to his people as a faithful and enduring husband we learn something very deep and very mystical when we marry and remain faithful through times of trial my spouse has a brain tumor that has left her partially paralyzed if it were to resume growing it is in remission thanks be to god then perhaps the time would come when we could not have sexual relations that s life the lord would certainly not give me permission to seek someone else to satisfy my needs the idea that it is alright to divorce if a couple grows apart seems to me to lead to such a monstrous destruction of the meaning of marriage that i feel we must make every effort to avoid any hint of compromise we have become so petty and small minded that some husbands are threatening to divorce their wives unless the wives lose weight i praise the lord for guiding me to marry my wife she married me anyway despite the possibility that i could have a terrible illness and it turned out that she was the one with the brain tumor but had i known i wouldn t have cared either and maybe i ll be in a car accident tomorrow and become paralyzed from the neck down a married couple should deal with these situations with the help of the lord not divorce and run away from them
