Pride and Prejudice You Know You Like It But It Drives You Insane

**A/N: I don't know where this came from, I swear.  
Title from the song You Know You Like It by AlunaGeorge (I imagine this could be the soundtrack to Darcepants' imagination)  
I own nothing!**

* * *

The first time it happens, it comes as perhaps more of a shock to him than it would to anyone else, were they privy to the scene playing out on the hundred-metre-high cinema screen in his head. He is William Darcy, CEO of Pemberley Digital, older brother come surrogate parent, perpetually single hybrid-car-owning gentleman. He is not some pimpled teenager with a newly discovered sex drive and a complete lack of control over his own mind, and yet that is exactly how he feels. Because Lizzie Bennet, whose unsuitability as an object of his regard was overshadowed only by that of her younger sister, had unwittingly revealed herself to be the most arousing human being he had yet encountered.

It had started innocently enough; a quiet evening in Netherfield, a few days after Jane and Lizzie's arrival. Bing and Jane were cosied away in a quiet corner of the sitting room, softly murmuring and laughing together. Caroline alternated between staring at the spreadsheets in front of her and shooting the occasional glance in his direction, smirking and rolling her eyes at the happy couple whenever she caught his gaze. William had brought his laptop down from his room, intending to go through his emails and ensure he was up to date, and Lizzie had settled herself on the opposite sofa with a book in hand. She seemed to be making herself quite at home, curling her bare feet under her and burrowing into the plush cushions. He supposed that was to be expected, that the Bennets would make the most of their current opulent surroundings while they had the opportunity. It must be quite a change from what they were used to.

He hated to admit to himself that, since his snap judgement of "decent enough" after a cursory once-over at the Gibson wedding, he had started to notice that Lizzie Bennet was in fact rather beautiful. He was determined that that realisation should not progress past a grudging appreciation of her aesthetics, but when he glanced over at her that evening, all hope of that backflipped out of the window.

Focused entirely on her book, Lizzie was unconsciously running her fingers back and forth across her lower lip, and in a flash William was wondering what it would be like to kiss her. Stunned, he blinks and tries to shake the image out of his mind.

"Darcy? Are you ok?"

_Damn Caroline for bringing attention to this._

"Yes, Caroline, I'm fine."

Lizzie had glanced up at this exchange, and offered him a tight half-smile before returning to her book and _oh god_ biting her lip. Suddenly his previous image is much more intense and he sees her hands raking through his hair, tugging him to her mouth so she can nibble his lip as he pulls her closer by the waist until the space between them vanishes and their breath comes faster and-

No. What a ridiculous thought, and so very unlike him to fantasise about a woman he barely knew. _Especially _when he had no genuine interest in her. _Especially _when she was in the same room. His mother would be ashamed. He did his best to put it out of his mind and continue working, and was successful, until an hour or so later when Lizzie uncurled herself from her seat and stretched.

He stared as she tipped her head back, exposing the smooth creamy column of her throat and sending auburn waves spilling across her shoulders. Her back arched, pushing her chest toward him and he felt his hands, mercifully hidden by the lid of his laptop, make a grabbing motion quite of their own volition. He glared down at them as though they had committed a cardinal sin.

"Well, I think I'm going to head to bed now. Goodnight everyone."

As soon as she said it, all he could think of was her in _his _bed, waiting for him to come upstairs. As she swept past him, he caught a faint whiff of her perfume and of course Fantasy William was now burrowing his face against Fantasy Lizzie's neck, inhaling the intoxicating scent and planting kisses along her jaw. Real William swallowed hard. This could be a problem.

* * *

Once it starts, he can't stop the fantasies from forming around her every little action. How terribly inconvenient, as they are living under the same roof and she doesn't seem to be leaving any time soon.

He worries that she might start to notice the way he zones out for a moment every time he looks at her, but he cannot help himself. He becomes even quieter than usual, retreating into his shell of stiff, reserved composure. If there is one thing William Darcy hates, it is having other people be conscious of when he is flustered, and Lizzie Bennet flusters him to no end. He does not think he will ever recover from the day he walked into the kitchen while she was eating a banana – that had required much alone time _and_ an ice cold shower before he could show face at the dinner table.

Another day, he is returning from a long bike ride when he meets Lizzie, in shorts and running shoes, walking down the driveway. _She was a runner? _He pictures her legs, toned and lovely, propelling her along the sidewalk. Fairly quickly, in his mind, that image is replaced by those same legs wrapped around his waist, feet digging into his back as he buried himself within her, swallowing her moans with a kiss. His vision fogs a little. Swiftly dashing the thought aside (_for now_), he slows down as he approaches her, stepping off his bike and removing his helmet to walk beside her. The exercise has brought a colour to her complexion for which he absolutely _refuses_ to consider alternative causes at this moment because she is _right next to him._

"Good afternoon, Lizzie." She jumps.

"Darcy! I didn't see you there. You shouldn't sneak up on people like that, it's creepy." She pulls her headphones out of her ears as she talks, winding the cord around her (old model, he notes to himself) iPhone.

"I- I apologise. I did not realise you were… listening to music."

She scoffs. "Yeah, well. I was."

They walk in silence for a while. William notes a bead of sweat coursing across Lizzie's skin from her neck over her collarbone and down into her cleavage. His interior cinema screen shows him following it, gently nipping a trail with his teeth. His grip on the handlebars tightens considerably.

"You should take care not to wrap it so tight, you know."

"Excuse me?"

"The cord, for your headphones? It can get damaged if you wrap it too tightly around your phone."

She stares at him for a second. "Right. I'm going in for a shower. See you, Darcy."

William has to admit he is a little grateful she makes such a swift departure. For one thing, his spandex shorts are starting to betray him greatly, and for another, she cannot hear him groan at the thought of her in the shower.

* * *

It is not until one night when their group takes a trip to Carter's bar that William accepts the depth of his feelings for Lizzie. He watches her for most of the night and finds many more things that will spin around his head for days. The way her lips wrap around the neck of a beer bottle. The way her hands move when she talks, or the sparkle in her eyes when she laughs. When she goes to the bar for another round, he watches how she rests her elbows on the wooden surface and stands on her tiptoes, leaning over to get the bartender's attention. _Shameless._ The man would be a fool if he did not serve her first. William takes note of the way her calves flex as she rises onto the balls of her feet, and of course straight away Fantasy William is holding her leg up in the air, tracing kisses from her ankle up the length of her leg while she giggles and squirms and her eyes sparkle just for him.

He realises then, with a sensation much akin to a punch in the gut, that his fantasies are not simply an unfortunate combination of long gaps between lovers and a lack of desirable women in this town resulting in misdirected lust. He actually _likes _Lizzie. Romantically. He had thought her interesting in that she was actually smart, and had her own opinions and did not simply agree with everything he said. He found her intellectually challenging, and although they had not yet discussed anything to do with his company, he knew she was interested in the digital media field and was someone he could potentially discuss the minutiae of his job without boring her to tears. He had simply never thought to connect his opinion of her mind with his dreams of her body until right now, when he discovers that forming a real connection with her, in and out of the bedroom, would greatly please him.

He is pondering this realisation when he sees a man approach her at the bar, presumably an acquaintance from the friendly greeting she gives him. She nods at something he says to her and turns back to the bartender, yelling over the loud music and pointing over to their table, before grabbing the man's hand and heading for the dancefloor. Watching her move, William is consumed with equal parts lust and overwhelming jealousy. She is a surprisingly good dancer, bouncing to the beat, shaking her hair around and twirling, causing her skirt to flare out and reveal a few more inches of her extremely grabbable thighs. He longs to be the one with his hands on her waist, swaying to the music and watching her mouth the words with her eyes closed. He would be closer than her current partner, though, propriety be damned, and have better moves. He wanted to make up for his awkward shuffle at the Gibson wedding, where a hundred pairs of eyes had been sizing up him and his wallet with much scrutiny and his already limited social skills had suffered as a result.

When his view is momentarily blocked by the bartender approaching with a tray of drinks that Lizzie must have sent over, William realises he had been digging his nails into his palms and inspects the crescent marks left behind. He vows to find out from Caroline what kind of music might persuade Lizzie Bennet to dance with him again, and to finally set up the sound system in the lounge.

It was time to stop fantasising.

* * *

**A/N: Ha. Ha ha ha. What. There *might* be a chapter 2 coming if I can get the guts to finish/post it (if I do, it will be smuttier than this one. You know, if that's what you're into. Blame pragmatist over on AO3.)  
Also, I don't know where the whole "Lizzie being a runner" thing came from. She doesn't really seem like a runner to me, but I like that scene so there.  
Can we freak out now though because SANDITON OH MY DAYS. I'm so excited I can't even.  
As always, comments and criticism are encouraged because I am a terrible editor!**


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