Mass Effect We Are Human

Title: We Are Human

Author: Limmenel

Rating: T

Pairings: FemShep/Jacob; FemShep/Miranda friendship, possibly implied romantic beginnings.

Summary: Home from the suicide mission, having destroyed the Collector base, Shepard receives an unexpected visit from Miranda with an odd request and together they start to pick up the pieces.

Author's Notes: Yesterday I finally finished Mass Effect 2. I've decided that I now need to write fanfiction for it. Anything I write will be based purely off of ME2 and whatever was hinted at or I read in the wiki about the first game. Sadly, I moved out before I ever realized my brother owns a copy of the first game for his Xbox. One day I'll play it but for now I'm waiting for ME3 in the mail. Anyway, sorry to ramble, on with the story!

Deaths of characters are unrelated to the end of the game as I played it, I merely chose characters that worked into the plot. I also know not a lot of people are fans of FemShep/Jacob but there were certain aspects to their relationship I found intriguing. This story may remain a one-shot or, if readers would like to share their opinions in a review, it might become longer or lead to a sequel.

—

The Normandy was quiet. The crew deck was devoid of its characteristic movement or voices that filled the air like a light mist for the ears. The crew, what remained of the crew, had slowly returned to their quarters. The survivors of Commander Joann Shepard's squad had followed suit. The ship merely hummed, the only sign that time was still moving.

The return from the Collector base had proved to be a solemn affair. While, deep down, a feeling of success roared within each squad member, feelings of loss had taken over the surface. No one dared speak, share their thoughts, or even voice the memories of their fallen friends they would later come to rely on. It was too soon. Words would not fill the empty seats of Zaeed Massani, Mordin Solus and Jacob Taylor.

However, the silence only lasted for so long. Back aboard the Normandy, the squad didn't even have the time to take their first breaths of relief in the ship they considered their home when Jack snapped. It seemed like the benign frustration and mix of turbulent emotions they were all feeling at first, when she lashed out against the nearest console with her foot. For a moment, she calmed and it seemed like she was about to lapse back into silence. Then it was all out war.

The biotic woman stormed forward but then, just as quickly, spun back on her heels and lunged forward to shove Miranda. Stunned, the remaining squad members either jumped back, too exhausted to restrain the angry young woman or shot forward to assist the ship's executive officer but were blocked by a shield of pulsing blue biotics. Jack shoved Miranda again, into the nearest wall.

"They—didn't—have—to—fucking—DIE!" she shrieked, punctuating each word with her palms hitting Miranda's shoulders. "You fucking Cerberus bitch, it was your people that got us into this fucking mess! It was Cerberus, it's—_always_—Cerberus!"

"Jack, stop," Miranda whispered and she did. The younger woman hung her head and backed away, much to the rest of the squad's amazement. Jack took off for the elevator and was not seen again for several hours, instead taking out her ageless anger at Cerberus, her only scapegoat, on the walls in her little "hide-y hole".

Since then, the squad had retired to their own places of peace, whatever their definition of the word. Shepard found her way to the Captain's quarters, stripped herself of her bullet-riddled armour and eased her aching body onto the edge of her bed, where she sat, staring at the floor. There, however, she did not remain, soon getting up and changing into her more casual attire. Taking a deep breath, the commander inhaled her first breath she could take knowing it was over. That those they had been able to save were back where they belonged and that, although the bigger picture of their troubles was not yet completely gone, they could have a moment to settle down.

Shepard settled down on the bed once again and called up her omni-tool. Though sleep tugged at her eyelids, she found herself on the extranet, searching the names of those they had lost. She lingered on the search results for "Jacob Taylor". She had not been looking for anything specific, she just stared at his name. Jacob, the man she teased and flirted with. The man who had made it seem like the mission stopped when he was in the room, that not everything was just business as usual. Her Jacob, she liked to think. Her feelings for him had never been given the proper chance to develop and now she would never know if his would have too.

Shepard sighed and lay on her back, staring at the ceiling of her quarters. She was Commander Joann Shepard, considered a hero by some. She had preserved the survival of humanity once again for at least one more day. At what cost? She had lost comrades before, this was not new. She had seen her share of death. She was a fighter, she was determined and headstrong. Inwardly, Shepard knew that what she felt now would ease and she would be herself again soon, but for now she wanted to remain like this. She wanted to reach into her heart and pull out the feelings she had for Jacob as if they would bring him back.

"Commander Shepard."

EDI's voice brought the intercom to life, breaking the commander from her thoughts. Shepard sat bolt upright, momentarily in a state of panic, as if their victory had all been imagined and they were to be attacked again, just as they thought they were all safe. But the commander knew that EDI would have merely continued, not waited for Shepard to respond, if there was a situation of any urgency.

"Yes, EDI?"

The intercom buzzed, as if the AI were about to speak but stopped to pause. Shepard had never actually heard the AI hesitate before. If the computer did have any doubts—which Shepard was unsure was even possible—she went on as if her pause had been purposeful.

"Miss Lawson has been standing outside the doors to your quarters for quite some time now. I believe she wishes to enter but does not wish to disturb you."

Shepard looked at the doors in surprise. She had not even heard footsteps approaching. The commander stood and composed herself, making for the doors as EDI took her movement as approval to open them. Outside stood the executive officer, looking exactly as she had when they had boarded the Normandy and after her encounter with Jack.

Miranda stood stiffly as she normally did, her posture screaming professionalism. If there was something she would not do, she would not let emotions slip in front of her commander while they were all just trying to pick things up again. Shepard greeted Miranda as she always did, like a friend, something the ex-Cerberus operative was never quite sure she understood but had come to accept. It was the reason why she had come to the commander's quarters in the first place.

"How can I help you, Miranda?"

Shepard's tone was even, matching Miranda's professional stance, still hovering just outside the doors, not intruding upon a superior's space, but at the same time Shepard's words held more than just formalities. Her eyes revealed what her voice did not, a genuine caring for the woman in front of her. Shepard took a step back and Miranda stepped into the room but hardly more than a few paces.

"Commander, I know that now is probably not the best time but I knew you of all people would understand," Miranda started, her voice slipping slightly as she carried on. "I had come to ask a favour of you."

Shepard moved so she could lean against her desk, casually offering Miranda a small smile. "Miranda, you know I'm always here to help my crew." Pushing her previous emotions over her own loss aside, Shepard added: "Now especially."

Miranda responded with a listless chuckle. "Actually, Commander, it was more of a practical favour."

"Well then, hit me."

"Thing is, Commander, Jack is as displeased with me as ever and we all wanted to wash up— "

Shepard laughed quietly, surprising Miranda, who had managed to make the strange request sound as normal as asking to borrow a data pad in spite of her reservations about the situation. Miranda almost stiffened, wondering if the commander was trying to mock her. Perfect Miranda, the ice queen who was beyond being affected by something like a petty confrontation between crew members, unable to face having to share a small washroom facility with Jack. But the commander was giving her the same gentle smile as before.

"You don't want her to lash out again. It's okay, Miranda, no one would want to put themselves in that situation. Especially when we're all on edge as it is. You're more than welcome to change here."

Shepard moved across the quarters, stopping to pull out a clean set of standard Cerberus casual attire. Miranda lingered by the door to the commander's private facilities, finally allowing a slight look of bashfulness to cross her face. Shepard remembered a similar look Miranda had previously let slip when first telling the commander about her sister, Oriana. Sometimes Shepard wondered if Miranda knew how many emotions she really did have even when she tried to keep them carefully concealed. Or maybe she was just learning, finally having found someone she could trust not to react badly to anything Miranda was willing to admit. Shepard had never done anything, as far as she knew, to ever have betrayed Miranda's trust.

Miranda accepted the garments with a terse but appreciative nod and slipped into the small, adjoining room containing Shepard's personal toilet, sink and shower. Against her will, there was still a tickle in her stomach, a flutter that had persisted since she had walked into the women's restroom and realized that there would be no room for both Jack and herself. Shepard never ceased to surprise her. Where Miranda expected criticism from anyone else, Shepard made sure to set things right. She made sure Miranda was cared for. It was more than anyone else had ever tried to do for her. Slowly, she stripped of her dirty clothes and gear and turned on a steady stream of warm water.

—

Shepard had moved to the couch and settled there to wait. Her previous thoughts of Jacob lingered but had now moved onto another thought that was more intrusive. She remembered the odd conversations where Jacob would mention Miranda in passing. However brief these mentions were, she had always sensed the man's firm tone when he spoke of the executive officer, as if they had shared a past Shepard was not privy to but knew had been important. Jacob had cared for Miranda, that much she knew. She knew Jacob allowed Miranda to set the barriers and distances but his tone had always let on that he would never turn his back on her. At first Shepard assumed it was because of their Cerberus connection. But as she got to know them both, Shepard agreed with Jacob and had suspicions that, if anything, he would have wanted to Shepard to look out for her.

Shepard would honour that suspicion to the best of her ability.

Her thoughts beginning to drift away, silence once again took over the Normandy, except for the muted sound of running water. Not long after, it ceased too. Miranda had just changed into the borrowed clothing when she took in a sharp breath and clutched at her side. Shepard heard the dull _thud_ from outside.

She was at the door in seconds. Under any other circumstances, Shepard would have knocked first but her initial thoughts immediately leapt to the conclusion that she had lost another member of her squad and another friend. Thankfully, Miranda was fully dressed and would be spared the intrusion that would have occurred otherwise. Miranda was not quite lying on the floor but appeared to have dropped to her knees then collapsed onto her elbow which she used to prop herself off the cool floor.

"On edge, huh, Commander?" she commented wryly. In spite of her casual tone, there was a hitch in her breath as she tried to push herself up so she was not looking up at Shepard. Even now, in obvious pain, she would not be seen as any kind of weak.

At first, Shepard could not figure out the source of Miranda's clear physical distress. Then it came to her.

_Their biotic shield had been successful. The doors were sealed behind them. Exhausted, Samara pushed herself forward and the other two, Garrus and Tali, were shaking with obvious relief after their close call with the seeker swarms. They had mere moments to pause and catch their breath when Shepard heard Miranda's voice in her ear:_

"…_repeat, Shepard, do you copy?"_

_Shepard put a hand to her ear and turned._

"_I copy. What's your position?"_

"_We're at the door. They've got us pinned down!"_

_Miranda had not even finished speaking when Shepard launched into action and darted forward to the other set of doors. Miranda's voice had been breathless and her messages blunt and to the point. She was obviously more concerned with not being killed than giving much of an explanation._

"_We're coming; just hold on!" Shepard's gun was at the ready, she moved was in position. "Get this door open!"_

_Samara had it open almost immediately. Then the fight began. The others fell into their clear room, shooting at the Collectors behind them, picking them off one by one. There were still too many. "Seal the door!" They would never kill them all, they needed a solid barrier between themselves and the enemy. The doors slammed shut. Gunfire ceased. Miranda slumped against a wall, holding her side. Shepard was next to her but Miranda looked up and dismissed any concern._

"_I'm ready for action, Commander."_

_Shepard had no time to argue or check to make sure it was not just Miranda's pride or a second-in-command's bravado in front of her comrades. She grasped Miranda's shoulder supportively before moving on, Miranda only pausing to catch her breath before she was at Shepard's heels._

Shepard offered a hand to Miranda, who took it and Shepard helped pull her to her feet. Taking the other woman's arm over her shoulder, Shepard supported her back out into her quarters and sat her down on the couch.

"How bad?" Shepard asked quietly. Miranda just gave her a nonchalant shrug.

"Nothing I can't manage. I heal faster than other humans. I suppose that is one of the perks my father gave me."

"Miranda."

She regarded the commander with a stony expression. When Shepard refused to back down, holding Miranda's gaze firmly, she relented and lowered her gaze to the floor. "It was just a graze. I had only just managed to get behind the doors. It's fine now."

"You collapsed," Shepard said skeptically.

"It was unexpected."

Miranda slowly but steadily got to her feet and turned away from Shepard. She glanced down at the N7 helmet on the commander's desk. She reached out and brushed the visor with her fingers. A helmet was a shield. It blocked its wearer from the outside but also kept everything else, sometimes things like precious oxygen, in. Her struggles were like the oxygen. Miranda kept them in and kept them to herself. She could only own her mistakes and her struggles were made of her mistakes. She would stonewall the commander only thinking that she needed to keep any distress to herself. It was not just that she was using her helmet as a shield and blocking everyone else out, not at all.

"You know, Miranda, we're all in pain. We all got out lucky for the most part. But whether or not we were injured or we suffered a loss, we're all going to need to heal. Asking for help isn't weakness. Often we're stronger when we let others help carry the burden. We can't all be perfect, we are human."

Shepard's intentions were good. Miranda knew they were and she regarded the words carefully and weighed her own with even more caution. All that escaped was a line she could feel on her lips almost before she thought it. A default response. "Some of us were built to be perfect."

Miranda started toward the doors back out to the elevator. Her posture was uneven and Shepard spotted it immediately.

"You should see Doctor Chakwas. She may still be recovering but she'd never leave her crew untreated."

Shepard watched the back of Miranda's head nod in silent acknowledgement. The ex-Cerberus operative then set off to leave once again and Shepard wondered if she would even go to the ship's medical bay. Then Miranda did something that surprised her. She turned back to Shepard.

"I'm sure the doctor would like to check in with you as well, Commander."

It was subtle but Shepard nodded. Of course, the Lazarus Project director would never fail to make sure her handiwork, the commander, was in nothing but top shape. But Shepard picked up on the other woman, the human one, who had just come out of battle and needed a partner, even once the fighting had stopped.

"I can walk, Commander."

Shepard chuckled and let Miranda lead the way. Her crew would heal, she knew that. In time, they would be well rested and in better spirits. She knew it would take awhile to readjust. But, as she had told Miranda, they all shared the burden.

Everyone on the ship would be right behind the other in case they were to fall.


End file.

Mass Effect, Angst, Hurt-Comfort