Fifty Shades Trilogy 1. Beginning

**All rights belong to E. L. James ME; story line is mine as are all OC's**

_This is a spin off from my story Whole Again, featuring a cast of Original Characters who belong to me. No stealing them :P Anyway, this was originally a one-shot, but may develop into a mini-story... but only if you guys REVIEW and tell me if you like it or not. If you do like it, I'll write more, if not then I won't :D_

Well I hope I'll see you at the bottom :)

_Musical Inspiration: The First Time Ever I Saw Your Face, by Leona Lewis._

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I'm sitting in my bedroom on a Saturday night twiddling my thumbs not knowing what to do with myself. I don't like being here alone with _her. _The kids are with Michael, so I have absolutely nothing to do, I can't even have a movie night with the other girls, Leah and Brianne who are the nannies who look after Riley and James.

I switch the TV on and try to watch a few episodes of Friends to kill an hour but I have zero concentration. I sigh as I lift my pillow and place it over my face and scream while kicking my feet.

_Wow, super mature Eleanor—even Lexi doesn't do that anymore._

When I first got the call from the agency saying I had passed the extensive background checks for a family and I had an interview I was so excited. I'd just turned 20 that year. I couldn't wait to have my first job after graduating a year early with two bachelor degrees, one of which in child psychology and the other in child development. Mrs. Foster answered the door clearly very pregnant and introduced herself and that was it. I never saw her again for the rest of the interview. Michael greeted me after Mrs. Foster went upstairs and I felt all breath leave my body, it was like… the atmosphere was charged and crackled all around us. I was sure I saw him swallow rather hard but it must have just been my imagination, because he has been nothing but the perfect gentleman around me. I had never seen a man more good-looking in my entire life. Michael told me that his wife was feeling tired which is why she went upstairs to lie down. I remember feeling bad for her—what a crock of shit that turned out to be, she just doesn't care about anyone but herself.

Leah and Brianne, who are about ten years older than I am, interviewed me along with Michael. I know I felt a powerful draw to him, which was and still is completely one-sided… even pregnant his wife was outrageously gorgeous… I remember thinking why would he ever look my way when he has her in his bed. I didn't know it then but she is ugly and rotten to the core.

I moved in the following week to get myself situated on how the Foster's liked their home run. A few weeks later Alexia Gabriella Foster was born and I swear that little girl owned me heart and soul the moment she was placed in my arms. It still boggles my mind that her own damn mother can't love her the way I do, she's the most perfect kid on the planet and I would give my life's blood to make sure she is always safe, loved and happy.

I am contemplating maybe calling my friend Rachel and asking if she wants to go for dinner and a movie with me because I can't be inside this house for one more minute. Mrs. Foster has been screwing whomever she met on Friday night and they have done nothing but… have sex. I almost feel like I need a shower just to remove the 'dirty' from my skin. For being such a large house, you would think you wouldn't be able to hear anything… but unfortunately for me, I can and it's fucking—pardon the pun—with my head.

I am just about to pick up my cell to call Rachel when it starts ringing… I lift it from the nightstand and my heart immediately lodges itself in my throat—the only reason Michael would be calling me is if something was wrong with one of the kids. My hands are trembling as I slide my thumb across the screen to answer.

"Michael…is everything alright?" I ask in a rush as soon as I put the phone to my ear. My heart is racing and my palms are sweating as my mouth goes dry.

"Elle, listen Lexi is sick… and I can't get her to take the medicine you packed. She is in bed crying her heart out and asking for you, well she asked for mommy but we both know it's not her poor excuse of a mother she wants." He sighs and I can imagine him rubbing at the scruff on his face.

"Do you want me to talk to her and try to calm her down?" I ask him, tracing invisible patterns on my comforter.

"I know it's a Saturday night and you are probably busy with your friends or boyfriend and stuff but… I don't think she is going to go back to sleep if she doesn't see you. I really am sorry…" He sighs and I shake my head even though I know he can't see me.

"I don't have a boyfriend… I mean I'm not… I'm at the house; I don't have plans or anything so I can swing by your place. Do you need me to bring anything… more medicine or clean pajamas?"

_Damn, talk about an awkward sentence Eleanor!_

He tells me to bring more stuff for Lexi so I go into her bedroom and grab a few pairs of clean PJ's and a few comfy outfits since she'll probably spend the remainder of the weekend in the house. Once I have everything I head downstairs. I grab the child Tylenol and also the Kool 'n' soothe fever strips to take her temperature down.

I grab my car keys along with the holdall that contains Lexi's stuff. It doesn't take me long to drive out to Michael's place. The Foster's have multiple houses in Seattle and the surrounding area and when he left the evil queen he moved into the other place they have in Medina. I press the buzzer and I'm immediately granted access when I arrive at the gate I drive up to the house and see Michael standing at the front door with a very dishevelled Lexi resting on his hip with her little arms around his neck and her head tucked into her father's shoulder.

She look's up when she hears the car door close and as soon as she see's me she starts sobbing again. Her little cheeks are all flushed and her beautiful curls are stuck to her sweaty face. She leans away from her father and holds her arms out to me. I immediately reach for her and she wraps her legs around my waist with her hands around my neck.

"M—Mommy… I don' feel g-gwood. I wana go sick." She sobs. I don't correct her and instead I simply press my hand to the back of her head and rock her from side to side. Michael steps back from the front door so I can enter. I stand in the foyer, unsure where I'm supposed to go.

"It's okay sweetheart, I'm here now." I soothe her as she cries… she's so warm.

"Let's go into the living room. I have her blanket and pillows on the sofa so that she could snuggle and watch cartoons with me." I nod with a smile and follow behind him. I take a seat where Lexi's stuff is lying and rock her in my arms.

"Oh sweet-pea you sure don't feel well huh? It's okay… daddy and I are here. You need to take some medicine and drink some water, will you do that for me?" I ask her in a soft voice. Her sobs have subsided and all she has now are hiccups. Michael passes me a wet wipe and her medicine with a bottle of flavoured water.

I wipe her tearstained face and snotty nose before kissing her forehead. She is burning up… I get Michael to measure out 5mls of Tylenol onto the little spoon and she opens for me, taking it all with a scrunched up face.

"I know sweet-pea, it doesn't taste good but it'll make you feel so much better. Let's get you into some clean pajamas and I'll put something cold on your forehead to soothe it okay?" I ask as I pass over her flavoured water. She takes slow sips before passing it back to me. I quickly strip her sweaty pajamas off and get the clean ones, which consist of a pair of tiny shorts and a thin cotton vest top to keep her cool. I pull back the comforter, on the sofa along with a pillow from her bedroom, and tuck her in before putting the cooling strip on her forehead. Thankfully the comforter is quite thin and won't make her feel sweatier than she already is.

"Do you want to watch something on TV sweetie? Are you hungry, do you want some more of your water or anything else to drink?" I ask her and she says yes to the TV but refuses a drink and some food. Hopefully she'll eat something a little later.

"Can you and d-daddy watch a moovie wif me?" She asks in such a small voice and I look up to Michael to see what his reaction is and all I get is a small, knowing smirk.

"Sure pip, what do you want to watch with daddy and Ellie?" He asks her and she ponders for a few minutes before asking to watch Tangled. Michael places the disc into the DVD player and settles on the opposite end of the couch.

"Mommy—I mean, Ellie will you get unda the cover wif me? I wana sit on your lap, pwease?" She asks with pleading eyes, which causes me to roll mine, earning me a slight giggle from Lexi. I lift her up and get under the covers before I sit back down with her on my lap sideways. She is curled into me with her head resting comfortably on my shoulder. I quietly run my fingers rhythmically as the movie plays while she gets closer and closer to sleep, and eventually her eyes close and her breathing even's out.

"Is she asleep?" Michael asks in a whisper and I nod. He probably wants me out of his house now that he knows Lexi is okay.

"Yeah she's sound asleep. I'd give her a few more minutes before you move her though, just to be safe. As soon as you put her to bed, I'll be out of your hair, I promise." I smile up at him and he shakes his head at me. What is that all about?

"Elle, I'm worried she'll wake up during the night and be upset again. I'd hate to have to call you to come over because she woke up and needs your comfort. It would make so much more sense for you to just stay here. You can have a guest room or maybe even sleep in Lexi's bed since it's queen size and she's tiny." He offers with a pleasant smile.

"Are you sure? I mean… I don't want to impose." I add weakly and he chuckles and shakes his head yet again.

"It's fine, and there is no imposition. I'd like for you to stay." He says with a twinkle in his eyes.

Michael eventually lifts Alexia out of my arms and they ache in her absence. I love that little girl with every fibre of my entire being. Ten minutes or so later, Michael comes back into the living room with a bottle of wine and two glasses in his hands.

_Huh? _

He lays them on the table before pouring us both a glass and hands one over to me. For the first time he appears to be nervous.

"I can't ever tell you how glad I am that you came into our home four years ago. I would have gone insane with that psychotic narcissistic bitch. I want to thank you for giving my children unconditional love. They have it from me but they need a mother's love too and you've given them that." He whispers as he angles his body to face me and I do the same.

"I love Lexi and the boy's Michael. They're the very best parts of my life." I whisper through a tight voice. He sighs as he lays his hand over the top of mine and squeezes gently.

"I don't know why I stayed with her as long as I did… but I think I've figured out the reason Ellie." He murmurs as his eyes are fixed on my lips and I can't help but lick them. He doesn't even try to mask the groan that just escaped him.

"What did you figure out?" I ask with my heart racing like it's about to break through my chest.

"If I hadn't married Diane, and stayed with her for as long as I did… I wouldn't have my children and therefor I wouldn't have met you. From the day I interviewed you, all I wanted was to be able to have you in my arms. To kiss you and hold you… I will understand if you don't feel the same and I won't hold it against you. I just… seeing you with my children, the way you nurture and care for them… it makes me happy Elle. You are the most beautiful women I have ever seen and I've fallen in love with you. My marriage was on the rocks long before I met you but the moment my eyes locked with yours… I just knew that nothing was ever going keep me from you, including my wife. Ellie you woke me up from a life of endurance." He holds onto my hands and all I can do is squeeze his hands in response knowing that if I whoop and holler for joy, Lexi is going to wake up.

"I… don't know what to say Michael. I can't believe that you feel this way too. I always thought it was one sided, the attraction, the draw to you has been there for years. I couldn't see how you'd ever be interested in someone who is just the hired help. I don't know why on earth you want me… I'm nothing special Michael; I'm nothing." I whisper, pushing the words passed the lump in my throat.

"Honey listen to me… you are so special; you have this warmth that just emanates around you all the time. You are sweet and kind and nurturing. You are everything she isn't and I swear to god I have fallen for you so deeply that I can't even see straight anymore. I know I am older than you, I'm 44 and I'm not getting any younger… Christ I'm old enough to be your father, but I can't deny this attraction anymore, but more than that… I don't want to Elle. I need you too much." He says tightly as his eyes bore into mine.

"I don't care how old you are, you are all I think about. You make me believe that princesses, magic and true love really exists. I feel like I've been waiting for you all my life." I whisper through a thick voice.

"You don't know how much that means to me sweetheart. I feel like I've been waiting a lot longer than you have though." He grins at me and I can't stop myself from slapping his shoulder. His smile fades quickly though and he takes my hand in his again before taking a deep breath.

"You already know that I'm divorcing Diane, I need you to know that I'm going to petition for full custody of the kids. I don't think she'll contest it but if she does then I am prepared to take her all the way. I want my kids with me all the time—and I want you here too, and not as a nanny… I want you with me as the woman I love, as the woman whom I want to marry… if you eventually say yes. Leah and Brianne are welcome to continue on as the boys' nannies, but only because I think that it would hurt them if they were suddenly not around anymore. I want you to know that you… you'll be their mother, just like you always have been Elle. They love you, and I love you too sweetheart, so much." He murmurs and my heart is about to beat right out of my chest when he moves closer to me. His hand comes up and caresses my cheek as he leans forward and captures my mouth in a kiss that is every cliché rolled into one. I get butterflies in my belly and a pulse heads straight between the apex of my thighs when his tongue slides into my mouth to tango with my own. Fireworks burst behind my eyes and it's all I can do not to completely dissolve.

"Elle… I've wanted you for years." He groans as he moves from my mouth, along my jaw and down onto my neck with little sucking kisses.

"I've wanted you too Michael, so much." I whimper as he grazes the wing of my shoulder with his teeth.

"Can I touch you?" He asks shyly and I nod with a small smile. His hand slides from its position on my thigh up to my hip, waist, ribs until he finds the curve of my breast. His hand slides up until he's palming the heavy swell while his thumb finds my nipple. I whimper into his mouth as he reduces me into nothing but a pool of arousal. I've never felt like this… ever.

"On my lap honey, I want you on my lap." He whispers hotly into my ear so I straddle his thighs and wrap my arms around his neck as his hands gravitate to my hips. He pulls me to him tightly so that I'm pressed against him in all the right places.

_Oh my GAWD! Is this really about to happen, am I really about to have sex? What do I do?_

I shake those thoughts, and I just follow my body's instincts His head leans back against the sofa as I rock experimentally and rhythmically against the hardness in his sleep pants.

_I can feel every inch of him and there is a… lot of inches! Shit this is gonna hurt so bad!_

"God you feel good, warm…so good." He moans with his eyes closed. I reach up with my hand as I rub my fingers over the designer stubble that covers his face. I can't help myself so I lean forward and take his mouth deeply.

"Michael, I've wanted this, wanted you for so long… please?" I beg, the throbbing in my clit is getting to be too much to bear. A guttural groan comes from deep within him as he lays his forehead against mine.

"Elle, I need to know if you're sure about me, about us. If we're going to do this, we have to be all in. I can't bear the thought of having you in my arms for just one night then having to let you go. I want you with me, you and the kids—I want and need the four of you here." He murmurs as he kisses and nips at my neck and collarbones.

"It's not a one time thing Michael… of course I want to be all in. I want to be here with you and the kids—we'll be a family filled with love, like it's supposed to be." I whisper feeling a lump in my throat. I swallow around it as Michael lifts me into his arms as he rises from the sofa.

"Where are we going?" I ask him en-route as my fingers play with the soft bristly hairs at the back of his neck.

"I'm taking you to my bed and when we get there… I'm going to worship you like I've wanted to since the moment I met you Miss. Baxter. Is that okay with you?" He asks me as he nuzzles my neck with his nose.

"It's more than okay." I sigh in relief as he gently places me on top of his very comfortable bed. He takes my hands in his and holds them over my head as he explores my mouth. I moan loudly as I arch my back, pushing my breasts against his chest.

As our mouths meet and collide with each other, both our tongue's battling for dominance… neither giving the other an inch. My thoughts are obliterated when he sucks my nipple through the fabric of my shirt and I can't contain the gasp that echo's around us. He fingers he hem and I take that as my queue to take the shirt off. When I do, his hands gravitate to my breasts almost instantaneously.

"These are fucking perfect love, so round and soft. Fuck these nipples…so pink and long, they were made for sucking!" He murmurs as he stares up at me with a cheeky smirk. He keeps eye contact as his face leans down slowly…

"I can smell you from here love, are you wet for me?" He asks while I fumble along, trying and failing to unbutton his fly. Eventually I get there and push them to his ankles where he kicks them off and simultaneously whips his t-shirt off. I take him in all his glory, so muscular, defined and sexy. I want to lick every perfect line of his stomach. It isn't until he's left standing there, wearing his boxers that I realize I've zoned out and in doing so, I haven't answered his question.

"Yes! I'm wet and I'm more than ready… I've been ready for four years Michael. I need you!" I whimper the ache in my sex too much to bear any longer. When he crawls on top of me I really start to feel nervous, terrified even but I can't deny that he's the one I'm supposed to be with and for that reason, what we're about to do can't be wrong. His hands thread into my hair as he sucks my lower lip into his mouth, softly licking and biting at it; which heads straight to my pulsing clit.

"Protection, are you on the pill or do we need condoms? I'm clean—I always get check ups just to be sure." He asks, and I know that he is referring to Diane with the fact that she's cheated on him on more than one occasion. He has blamed himself for years thinking that he just wasn't enough for her to be faithful. Not muscular enough, not sexual enough, not man enough. It broke my heart to watch him tear himself apart over her.

A few weeks ago he came home from a business trip unexpectedly, he called me and asked me to have the kids ready because he was going to take them out to Chuck. E. Cheese for dinner since he missed them so much. I immediately drove straight back to the house as Diane had told Leah, Brianne and I to take the kids and make ourselves scarce for a few hours earlier that day. I repeatedly called the house but didn't get an answer. I was trying to get back quickly but Michael had got there before me and walked right in on her screwing the gardener. He said knowing and seeing are two very different things and the following night he moved out and hasn't looked her way since. He deals with me when he requests access to the kids, which has been every single weekend and if he's unavailable for a weekend with them, due to work then he takes them during the week. He is a damn good father; he has tried his best with the kids, to try and compensate for the fact that their mother doesn't give a shit about them.

I am pulled out of my thoughts as Michael nips at my earlobes, causing me to shiver and obviously expecting a response to his earlier question. I don't know how to tell him that I am squeaky clean… considering the fact that I've never had sex. I take a deep breath and capture his face in my hands.

"I'm on the pill, but there's something you need to know first…" I whisper and I struggle to find the words to tell him. It's extremely embarrassing to admit that no one's ever tried to you know… have sex with you. I mean, there's a reason a girl can graduate with two degrees rather in only three years rather than the four that it usually takes the average student to achieve one.

"What is it honey, you can tell me anything. I love you, whatever it is… we'll face it together." He murmurs to me before softly nipping his way along my jawline.

"You asked if I was clean… and I am, the reason I know this is because I haven't… I haven't, you know." I stare up into his eyes and his brow is wrinkled with confusion. I can't help but sigh and whimper a little with embarrassment. "Michael, I haven't ever had sex. I'm, I'm a virgin." I say in a rush. I cringe back into the mattress, unable to meet his eyes. He cups my face in his hands and slowly forces me to meet his gaze.

"Ellie, sweetheart… I love you; I've loved you for four years. I can wait a little longer. I mean, there's no way I'm going to do anything with you tonight. You deserve romance, the perfect date before we do anything." He tells me and although he smiles and I can see nothing but sincerity there's disappointment coloring his words.

"Michael, no… I don't need romance and dates. I've waited long enough for you. I'm here, and I'm ready. I want you to be my first. I need you, please?" I implore him and experimentally tilt my hips to meet his, earning a tortured groan.

"Are you sure, positive? You only get one shot at your first time. Are you sure you want it to be with me love?" He asks and I nod before thrusting my fingers through his hair and meet his lips. He groans as his thumbs dance along my jawline. With one hand he reaches behind my knee and lifts it into his palm before hooking my leg around his hip and grinds himself against me.

"Please!?" I beg as he rhythmically rocks against me.

"Sweetheart, I need to get you nice and relaxed so that I don't bruise you. I don't want to hurt you and I know that there will be some pain but I want to minimize it as much as possible." He whispers as his tongue flicks against my earlobe. He slides his hands into my sweats and I lift my hips as he slips them off and tosses them to the side so that all I am left in is a pair of pink cotton panties.

_You have so much gorgeous lingerie and on this night you pick the most girlish panties in your whole collection? You spend tonnes in Victoria's secret and today of all days you break out HELLO KITTY!_

"So sweet and sexy… and as cute as Hello Kitty is, she has to go." He says as he peers up at me and we both burst out laughing which stops me from internally berating myself on my choice of underwear. My breath catches in my throat as he lifts himself up and removes my panties. I am laying there completely bare to him, both physically and emotionally… yet I feel so safe, and comfortable.

"Stunning, you are completely breath taking Elle." He whispers in a low seductive baritone, leaving teasing nips and sucking kisses as he makes his way back up my body.

"I can't believe this is happening, I never… I never thought you would want me. You're… well you and I'm me." I whisper as a blush colors my cheeks.

"You are the most desirable woman I have ever seen Elle, how could I not want you?" He asks as if he's really puzzled by the concept and I feel like my heart blooms under his gentle gaze.

"I love you Michael, so much. I wouldn't want my first time to be with anyone other than you."

"I love you too sweetheart, and I will cherish this gift always. I can't begin to tell you what it means to me, to know that no one has ever or will ever touch you other than me ever again. You're mine, you've always been mine… in here and that's the only place it matters Elle." He lifts his hand and lays it over his heart in a gesture so tender that it moves me to tears.

"Please… I'm yours… I always have been, I always will be." I whimper as his lips press down on mine and I feel a current, a spark so strong that it could light up the Christmas tree in Times Square all on its own. He kisses down my neck, sucking and nipping on the wing of my shoulder, sending whispers of desire straight between my legs.

His hand reaches and grips behind my knee and returns it to his hip, grinding his boxer-covered hardness against me. I feel my belly tighten deep down as he speeds up and after a few seconds everything bursts and I come harder than I ever have before. I am a panting sweating mess by the time he stops.

"I know I'm fairly new at the whole having sex concept, but I'm positive that one part of the guy has to go inside the girl." I say with a grin as I pant, trying to catch my breath. He chuckles into the crook of my neck, leaving a quick kiss against my sweaty skin before he pulls back.

"It's okay love, this was just the appetizer… the entre is coming right up…" He pauses for a split second with a cocked brow "…Pardon the pun." I shake my head and giggle at the absurdity of the situation but the second he presses his hardness against me once more, the giggle catches in my throat as the electricity begins thrumming in my veins once more.

He pulls back and gets to his feet, I lift myself up onto my elbows as I watch him as he slowly slide his boxers down his narrow hips and step out of them. My eyes automatically drift to the hardness jutting straight out, swollen and erect… I can't help but gasp and panic. This is going to hurt so bad.

"It's okay love, I will be as gentle as I can. I won't hurt you anymore than necessary." He promises as he crawls back onto the bed. He takes my hands and holds them above my head as he presses some of this weight on top of me. I feel his erection rest against my thigh; the bulbous tip feels sticky against my skin.

"I'm ready, I love you and I want to feel you Michael. I've always been yours." I whisper as I feel his warm breath fan across the skin of my neck.

"Open your legs for me love, that's it…" He murmurs as I widen them, feeling a little self-conscious. His mouth hungrily explores mine as his hand makes its way down between my legs. I suck in a sharp breath through my teeth as I feel his finger slip between my moist lips.

"So wet, I can't wait to feel you sweetheart, to fill you completely." He groans as he slips one finger inside me and circles it around and around before pulling it back out and pushing in. He repeats this motion over and over again before adding a second finger and I feel myself stretch around them.

"I'm going to loosen you up a little so that when I go inside, it doesn't hurt you quite as much. I don't want to cause you any pain." He tells me as he steals my breath, panting into my mouth as his tongue laves across my bottom lip. I feel him widen his fore and middle fingers, like making a scissor motion inside me and I feel my muscles protest just a little, but after a few moments it starts to feel good. He adds another finger slowly, before pressing his thumb on top of the little bundle of nerves above my entrance.

"Oh god… please! I need you, I need to feel you Michael please?" I beg as he speeds up, his lips trail along my jaw, down the side of my neck as he nips and sucks all the way to my breasts. He takes one of my nipples into his mouth and sucks hard. A zap of pleasure shocks down my body, as if my nipple is connected to my clit. I feel the tension begin to build low in my stomach… the ache getting stronger and stronger as he works me over with his fingers and mouth. Just when I think I'm going to go insane with lust and need he whispers softly in my ear.

"I love you Elle, let go love… let go for me." He breathes and his soft spoken words are my undoing and I fall spectacularly. He continues to rub my clit, bringing me slowly back to earth. I heave breaths into my chest, my heart racing from the heights of pleasure he brought me to.

"Are you ready for the next step sweetheart, if you aren't… it's okay, we can turn onto our sides and I'll happily hold your naked body in my arms until morning." He tells me and although that thought is nice and makes me smile, its not what I want right now. I want him, all of him inside all of me.

"I'm ready, I want you…" I tell him earnestly. I am so ready for this, for us to take the first step into being truly together. Butterflies flutter in my stomach as his lips merge with mine. He takes his length in one hand, pumping up and down a few times before positioning himself to take me. My heart is racing as he thrusts back and forth through my folds, gliding along effortlessly because of the abundant arousal he brought out of me.

"Hold onto me tightly if it hurts love, I promise the pain will fade quickly. You are all I want, all I'm ever going to want and one day… I promise I'll make you my wife." He vows as he continues to rock back and forth. "I'm going to take you now love, please know that I love you more than I ever thought possible and I will love you until the end of time." He whispers against my lips as he positions the head of his erection against my entrance. I wrap my arms around his back, hooking my hands over his shoulders as he pushes forth gently, with the slightest pressure but I feel it. I feel my muscles stretching around him and it hurts, it hurts just as much as I feared it would… but I can bear it, for him I can bear anything.

I take deep breaths through my nose as I tuck my head into his neck, squeezing my eyes closed as I feel another inch of him push inside.

"Are you okay love?" He asks and I nod tightly, not trusting my voice. "It's okay… do you want me to stop?" He asks, his voice strained from trying to resist the urge to thrust himself all the way inside.

"No, no… keep going, I'm alright. Please just, just get the pain part over with and then go slow." I gasp, as he rocks forward at the same time, more of him slipping further inside me.

"Are you sure, I don't want to hurt you?" He pulls his head back a little and stares into my eyes. He lifts his palm and cups my cheek tenderly before kissing my slowly and deeply. I get so lost in his kiss that I forget about everything other than what his lips feel like as they press upon mine. I suck in a deep breath and cry out as he thrusts himself all the way inside me. The pain is unimaginable, like I'm being ripped wide open and I can't stop myself from digging my nails into his shoulder and reflexively clench my thighs around his hips. I feel tears leak from my eyes as I continue my hold, startled gasps of breath hissing through my clenched teeth.

"It's okay, it's alright love… that's it done, it's over. Shh… please don't cry, you're alright love." He reassures me, trying to pull his head back to look at me but I won't let go of him. I breathe deeply until I start to feel the pain slowly begin to ebb away. I let some shaky breaths leave my mouth before I loosen my hold a little.

"Just… just go slow. I'm okay, I love you—and I'm glad I waited on you, for this to be yours." I whimper, all the emotions from the last four years crash down upon me, the pain of unrequited love and the relief of knowing that it was mutual from the moment our eyes first met.

"Okay, just hold onto me sweetheart." He tells me as he slowly pulls back and thrusts forward again, he repeats this action over and over until I feel like my insides are liquid fire, everything burns with unadulterated pleasure.

"Oh god Elle, oh fuck… you feel so good, so fucking good!" He grunts, his lips attack my neck and shoulder. My hands grip his back and I can't help but rake my nails gently along the rippling, bunched muscles.

"Michael… I never, I never knew it would… feel like this. Please?" I moan a high-pitched keening noise and it causes a tortured grunt to escape his chest as his thrusts speed up. I feel like I am about to burst into flames.

"Yes love, that's it… oh you feel amazing, tight… so god damned tight, come on love, come! I can't hold on much longer… you feel too good and I can't stop myself!" He grits out, then kisses his way to my lips, his tongue explores my mouth as his hand makes its way to my clit, rubbing tight, wet circles above the place where we're joined as one. A few thrusts later fireworks explode behind my eyes and I am blinded with brilliant white light as pleasure courses through every one of my veins.

"Ugh… Michael!" I whimper as I clench around his erection. It feels so different with something inside me, like its so much more intense. I bite down on the bulging muscle that joins his neck and shoulder as my walls flutter around him, waves and waves of pleasure overtake every thought in my head.

"Yes, yes… come for me, come hard! Oh shit, fuck… fuck… FUCK!" He growls as he thrusts inside once more before I feel the warmth of his essence pour inside me. His head falls onto my shoulder, still holding the majority of his weight from me as we pant and try to catch our breath. After a few moments he pulls out of me as gently as he can, the sensation feels so foreign. He pulls my body with him as he rolls us over so that he is lying flat on his back and I am tucked into his side, with my head resting on his chest. I lay my arm across the rippled plane of his stomach and he holds me to him tightly before moving my hair away from my face and kisses my sweaty forehead. It feels like an age before he says anything and I begin to worry that he is regretting what we just did—my fears aren't allowed to stay for long though because he asks me what I was fearing myself.

"Are you okay, you… don't, you aren't regretting what we just did, are you?" He asks, his voice laced with worry and pain.

"No, never… I could never regret something as wonderful as what we just did. You made love to me Michael. I'll cherish that always, and I'm sure we'll repeat the performance many, many times." I giggle and a rumbling laugh vibrates through his chest as his fingertips run up and down my naked back.

"Yes we will. I love you, very much. I never want to be without you ever Elle. As soon as the divorce is finalized and I have custody of the kids… I want you to move in with me. I need you with me Elle." He whispers and I feel a blinding smile take over my face.

"You're awfully presumptuous Mr. Foster, who says I want to move in with you?" I ask with a grin as I rest my chin on his chest. He smirks down at me before twisting us back over so that he's on top of me and I squeal with a giggle as he growls into my ear.

"Oh I apologize for not phrasing my… demand correctly Ms. Baxter. How about if I ask you… will you please move in with me, will you be mine forever?" He asks as he rubs his nose up and down the length of mine.

"Yes, I'll move in with you as soon as everything is finalized. I will always be yours." I vow before his lips capture mine and soon we're lost to one and other once more.

* * *

**Chapter Note:** _Well, what did you guys think? If you enjoyed it then I'll write more… let me know in the review box below. Ellie & Michael along with the Foster kids will still feature in Whole Again. I wrote half of this chapter a while ago, when I first mentioned the possibility of a one-shot featuring the Fosters. When I write Elle… it's not a typo, I just feel like I dunno, Michael would call her Elle. _

_Do leave a review… I will be finished School for the year on the 18th of June and will have waaay more writing time so yeah, more updates on both this and whole again (if you guys want updates on this) if you do, it will focus on the divorce as it goes through and how Ana and Ellie form a bond etc, etc. This story—if it turns into a full story or a mini story will run along side Whole Again, showing Ellie & Michaels interactions with the Grey's in their POV._


	2. Understanding

**All rights pertaining to the Fifty Shades franchise belong to E. L. James; storyline and OC characters are all mine!**

* * *

I am pulled out of my arduous task of balancing the accounts for one of my fortune 500 companies out in California when my cell rings. I look at the screen and see a picture of the beautiful blonde goddess I now call my girlfriend.

"Hello beautiful girl… are you okay?" I ask, unable to stop myself from making sure everything is all right. I am terrified that something—namely my soon to be ex-wife—will eventually tear us apart and I'll lose the only woman who has made my life worth living for the last four and a half years.

"Hey you! I'm fine Michael I'm still at the Grey's place. Listen, Ana asked me to call you and invite you over for dinner tomorrow, what do you think… can you make it?" She asks and I immediately start to worry, right now we can't afford to trust anyone; if the Grey's are close with Diane then this could fuck everything up for us before we've even really started. I know Elle thinks she can trust Ana Grey but I've never met her… so I'm not sure of what to think. Sometimes it's better to be safe than sorry.

"Baby… have you told her about us? I mean, do you really know the Grey's enough to trust them?" I ask as I rub my hand over my jaw, it's a nervous habit and pretty much impossible to break.

"Yeah I told her… don't worry, we can trust the Grey's—I told you what Diane done to Christian, honestly I think they hate her more than you do and that's saying something!" She tells me and it loosens the knot tied around my chest at the thought of losing Elle because someone knows about our blossoming relationship. I hate that I have to keep our relationship secret… like I'm ashamed of what we have together.

"Oh yeah I forgot about that… I guess if you trust them, then it's fine with me. I'd love to accompany you to their house for dinner… you said that they aren't the usual pretentious power-couple and are down to earth, right?" I ask as I lean back in my chair, feeling nothing but love for the woman currently talking to me with her sweet little voice. Christ I want her so bad right now. We've been careful in keeping ourselves in check around the kids, it's hard but the last thing we need is one of the boys inadvertently revealing anything.

"Yeah… did Leah pick up the boys?" She asks and I can't contain my elated smile, she wants privacy with me… I always knew that we'd be amazing together but nothing could have prepared me for the influx of emotion and depth I'd feel when making love to my beautiful girl. It's never been like that for me… ever! I also can't deny how happy it makes me that she saved herself for the right guy, and that she chose me as the one to receive that gift. I've kind of got lost in my thoughts so I try to focus on what my girl is saying.

"So you're alone?" She asks.

"Yes love, I am totally alone in this big empty house… just thinking about you… thinking of burying myself deep inside you... how long will it be until you come home?" I ask as I palm myself over my jeans and I groan at the sensation. I hear her breath hitch in her throat and can't stop from smiling widely.

"I'll be over as soon as I can, I promise." She giggles and I can hear the husky tone in her voice. "I love you, and I'll be home soon." She tells me.

"I love you too angel, hurry home to me." I whisper and we say our goodbyes. I know with certainty that I won't get any more work done tonight, not with Elle here with me so I give up and log off my computer, I put all the files pertaining to this account and lock them back into the cabinet.

The night Alexia got sick and Elle come over, I had absolutely no plan or intention to tell her how I felt about her… but the way she dropped everything to be with our little girl just made me fall in love a little bit more. When she told me that she was a virgin, I can't deny the fact that I felt that all consuming instinct to claim her as my own… but I decided that I couldn't take her virginity until I could take her out on a real date and show the world just how much I love her but she surprized me totally, declaring that she was always mine and that she wanted me just as much as I wanted her.

I try to watch a little television while I wait on Elle arriving but it's no use, I have absolutely no concentration at all… thoughts of my girl have completely obliterated all traces of it. I decide to make us a nice lunch of sandwiches and tortilla chips… but hey I'm a guy; this is about my only skill in the kitchen. Just as I finish making our sandwiches and grab us a can of Pepsi each, I hear her car pull into the driveway.

"Honey I'm home!" She calls in a singsong voice, which makes me smile!

_Home… with Elle! I like the sound of that and I cannot wait until it is our reality._

"I'm in the kitchen love." I yell as I hear her make her way towards me.

"Have you been busy in here?" She asks as she wraps her arms around my waist from behind.

"I have indeed… I hope you like chicken salad sandwiches because this is about as good as your going to get from me in the kitchen. I didn't know which kind of chips you prefer… I have cool ranch or nacho cheese?" I ask as I grab some out of the pantry.

"I'm more of a spicy sweet chilli kind of girl but I'll take the nacho cheese." She grins at me and grabs the bag out of my hand. We take our lunch into the family room and I flick on sports center, but there isn't much on, so I resolve to find something else to watch. That's another thing I love about Elle, she enjoys sports just as much as I do.

We sit on the couch with our food and just simply bask in each other's presence where we can just be us… away from prying eyes. I flick through the channels and eventually find an episode of The big bang theory, which just started—I know that Elle loves that show, it's one of her all time favorite's.

"Yay, Sheldon! Seriously he is my favorite TV show character of all time!" She giggles as she open's her bag of chips and dumps them at the side of her sandwich. She lifts her legs and tucks them under her sexy ass and digs into her lunch. I find myself watching her more than I do the TV… I notice like the way she laughs with her entire face, her vivid green eyes brighten when she giggles at Sheldon's sarcasm inept mind. Another of the things that I love about her is that she doesn't eat like a prissy stuck up girl… like my wife. Elle enjoys food and she stuffs as much of it in her little mouth as she possibly can yet she maintains a perfect size two body. I feel myself stirring in my pants and honestly I am seconds away from grabbing her and tossing her over my shoulder to have my wicked way with her.

"Are you okay Michael… you seem a little… tense?" She peeks at me from the corner of her eye and I can see her mouth twitch… she knows exactly what she's doing to me right now.

"I'm fine love. I'm just patiently sitting here waiting on you finishing your sandwich so that I can take you upstairs to ravish you." I tell her as my finger reaches out and traces patterns on her forearm. I watch as her breathing increases and she turns to face me as she pops the last bite of her sandwich in her delectable little mouth.

"I'm finished now, so let the ravishing commence." She smirks at me and I lunge at her but to my surprize she places her palm over her lips to prevent me from kissing her.

"Nacho cheese Dorito breath." She mumbles and I can't stop myself from bursting out laughing, like full on belly laughing. She raises a brow at me and it only makes me laugh harder.

"I'm going to brush my teeth, so try to get over your little hysterical laughing fit by the time I get back. You made me a promise and I intend to ensure that you keep it." She smirks at me and stands up… swaying her hips as she leaves the room. I decide that the honorable thing to do would be to brush my teeth too so I take the stairs two at a time and find her in my bathroom. I pluck my toothbrush from the holder and we stand side by side, doing something that can only be described as taking care of mundane hygiene needs, but to me… it promises the life we will have together once everything is sorted out and we can be officially together. She rinses her mouth out with mouthwash before handing the bottle to me and once we've finished cleaning our teeth, I attack her. I pull her perfect, curvy body against mine and slide my tongue into her mouth, tasting her unique flavor along with the minty freshness called mouthwash.

"Bed baby, let's go to bed." I whisper in her ear before sucking the lobe between my teeth, nibbling my way down her neck as I lift her into my arms and carry her into the bedroom. Each time we've been intimate with each other, I've taken my time and made love to her but right now I am desperate for her and I don't know if I can stop myself from taking her roughly. I slip my hand between her legs, rubbing her over the seam of her jeans, which makes her eyes roll back in her head.

_Oh shit I need her so fucking bad!_

"Love, I don't know if I can control myself enough to make love to you… I need you, I need to fuck you; is that okay?" I ask as I continue to stroke her. I am painfully hard, harder than I have ever been in my entire life!

"Please… I want you hard and fast! Please?" She begs and she doesn't have to ask me twice. I whip my t-shirt off and I watch her eyes darken as they run up and down my bare chest. Yeah, she loves the fact that I am ripped and watching her watch me this way, if continuing to work out will keep her looking at me like this then I guarantee I will keep doing it. I tug her jeans off, leaving her in a cute little shirt and her white thong… fuck me!

"God baby, you look so perfect laying here on my bed." I stroke her through the soaked crotch of her pretty little thong before I stuff my hand down front of her panties and run two fingers along her slit, shit she is absolutely soaked.

"Michael… so close! You feel so good… uhh" She mewls, her hips rolling up to meet my fingers as they stroke her little pink clit, it's stiff and straining for my touch.

"That's it… ride my hand!" I lean forward and thrust my tongue into her mouth, exploring every inch of its warmth. I push one, then two fingers inside her and use my thumb to massage that clit. She grabs onto my wrist and uses it for leverage to literally fuck my fingers. I watch as her breasts rise and fall with the force of her breaths and she bites down on her lip just as she clamps down on me.

"Michael… yes, yes, yes, yes!" She whimpers as she stiffens, then she shudders and shakes violently… riding out her release, whimpering her pleasure.

"Shh… there's my beautiful girl." I say in a whisper as she finally returns to earth. I get up and push my jeans and boxers to the floor before crawling over her. I fist my dick in my hand and stroke up and down as I kiss my way up every delicious inch of her body until we're face to beautiful face. I push her blonde curls back and kiss her forehead. She wraps her arms around my neck and pulls me down to meet her. She attack's my mouth with wild abandon and I can't stop from grunting as her hands scratch my scalp.

_This woman is the best thing that has ever or will ever happen to me._

"Please… I need you inside me! I need to feel you fill me!" She begs as we share breaths. Her hands slide down my back, her nails scratching the entire way, which brings forth a shudder of unimaginable pleasure. It isn't until those perfect hands reach my ass and she pulls me closer, trying to get me inside her. I tuck my head into her neck and nip and suck her sensitive skin.

"Michael...?" She say's in a small, timid voice. "Please… just fuck me!" She groans and it spurs me into action. I grab my dick and line myself up with her, barely coating my erection in her moisture before I slam into her hard.

"Ugnnng!" She gasps, digging her nails into my shoulder. I heave little breaths from my chest and they fan across the sweat-damp skin of her neck, causing an involuntary shiver. I pull out slowly, teasing her by just barely keeping the tip of me inside her and wait for a few seconds before I slam back into her!

"So good love, ugh so fucking good!" I growl and start to move faster and faster, I feel myself hurtling towards the edge but I'm not falling unless she goes with me. I push my hand between us and massage her slick clit. I feel more and more moisture around my dick, making my movements glide even more than before.

"Michael… I'm… oh god! Oh god YES!" She screams as she clamps around me, pulses and pulses of pleasure blind me and I can't move, it's completely debilitating. I thrust into her even faster and harder than before, feeling that pulling sensation build, a shiver rocks down my spine and I thrust once, twice more before I stiffen and feel nothing but pure, raw, pleasure!

"Fuck… fuck… fuck Elle!" I grunt and collapse on top of her. Caging her with my weight as we both struggle to catch our breath.

"I love you so much Michael… so much it hurts." She whispers as she inhales our combined scents mixed with sweat and sex.

_Best smell in the world._

"I know baby, I love you too… more than I ever thought was possible." I kiss her shoulder and roll to the side, pulling her with me and it's barely a few moments later that I pull the throw over us and we both fall asleep.

**~o0o~**

I help Elle into the back of my car just as Jason, Christian's main bodyguard get's into the drivers seat. I have had way too much to drink to even consider driving so I was more than glad when Christian came up with this option. There's another guy following us in an SUV to take Jason back to the Grey's place. I get into the back with Elle and she sits as close to me as she possibly can with her seatbelt fastened and we hold hands for the entire drive. My mind is on complete information overload… and though they—Christian, Ana and Elle—told me not to, I can't help but feel totally guilty for allowing Diane to do all that she has done to our kids. I should have called her out on her bullshit years ago, but at the same time… if I had… I wouldn't be holding this beautiful woman's hand right now because like it or not, Diane brought us together by refusing to be an active parent.

"I had a good time tonight… did you?" Elle asks me as she strokes her finger up and down the back of my hand as it holds onto her other one.

"Yeah I did, I'm glad you convinced me to go to dinner with them tonight. They're really nice and you were right to trust them. I really don't know how to thank them for helping us with our situation. It was beyond amazing to be able to have a date with you tonight." I tell her and she smiles shyly at me. We don't say anything for the rest of the drive and we thank Jason for bringing us and the car home.

_Home… home with Elle._

"Do you want a glass of water or juice?" I ask her as I grab a glass and fill it up with ice from the refrigerator door before pressing the glass to the other side of the dispenser to add water.

"Yes please, that iced water looks pretty delicious right now." She smiles and I quickly hand her the glass before starting on another one for myself. I feel like I sobered up a lot on the drive home thankfully, because I'd really like to have a conversation with Elle about where we should go from here.

"Let's go into the living room and talk before we go to bed love." I grab both of our glasses and head into the living room of this ostentatious house. I lay both glasses on the coffee table and grab Elle's hand before tugging her down onto my lap.

"What do you want to talk about?" She asks in a small voice as she tucks her head underneath my chin. Almost like she's afraid that I'm about to end things between us…

_Yeah like that would ever fucking happen, she's the best thing that ever happened to me!_

"I promise you… it's nothing bad love. I just wanted to discuss where we should go from here, with Diane?" I ask her with my lips pressed against her hair and I can't help but bury my nose in it and inhale her sweet scent. She unwraps herself from me slightly, just enough so that she can stretch a little and plant the sweetest most delicate kiss I've ever had upon my lips.

"Well the quickest way to get the kids would be to take them for the weekend and file first thing on the Monday morning on the grounds of emotional neglect—but the least stressful for the kids would be to try Ana's method of saying to her that you don't want the kids. I honestly don't know what to do for the best." She tells me as she cups my cheeks. I lean forward and rest my forehead against hers.

"Love, I need you to tell me what you think I should do… you are a professional after all." I smile slightly and she sighs.

"I'm not sure I can be objective enough to be able to give you the answers you need, because what I want to do is to take the kids, file the motion and move into this house so we can be together. No one would question it because I'm just the nanny… even Diane wouldn't question it." She swallows deeply and hesitantly meets my eyes and I notice that hers are filling up with tears. "How can I tell you to do that when I know that the kids will go through hell?" She whispers as two tears fall from her eyes and I catch them with a few kisses.

"Don't you see? I know that you'll put them first but sometimes we need to do what's right for us too. Elle, tonight when Christian said all that stuff about neglect… about Diane's behavior... for far too long, I allowed her to get away with treating my children like crap, treating me like all I was to her was a stepping stone on the road to status and fortune—which, being honest, is exactly how she saw me—and treating you and the other girls like nothing more than dirt beneath her feet and I'm tired of it. You've shown me more love in the last week than I ever thought I would get to experience so… tomorrow I'm going to see Carrick Grey and get him to prepare to file the petition. I don't want the kids around her for a second longer than necessary." I watch her face as I speak and I can literally hear her heart racing. She doesn't say a word to me before crushing her lips down upon mine. I rock my hips up to meet hers and smirk when I hear her whimper.

"Wait… we need to talk." She reluctantly pulls back, panting. "So we're really doing this, we're really going to be a family?" She asks me and I know I have the silliest grin plastered on my face.

"Yes love, a real family. Tomorrow, after we've gone and spoken to the lawyer—can you go to the house and pick up the kids, we'll take them out for ice cream and bring them back here. Tomorrow Carrick will hopefully be able to file our temporary custody petition with the court and they'll live with us. I wonder how long it'll take her to realise that they're gone?" I ask, if I'm being completely honest I don't think she'll notice that they're gone at all—and that makes me sad, for them.

"What about Leah and Brianne, will they come with the kids too? How are we going to manage to get their stuff from the house, the kids' toys? Michael I'm worried about all of this. I know right now that it seems like it'll be a walk in the park but I don't think it'll be that easy. To Diane, the kids are her meal ticket to a stake in your company." She says and gets more frantic with each word that falls from her lips.

"Shh… everything is going to work out Elle, it has to. Once the court has granted the petition we'll make sure that they'll allow us to go into the house and get the kids' essential possessions as well as you, Leah and Brianne's things too. We'll get through this one step at a time. Let's work on getting you relaxed for now, okay?" I ask her as I trail kisses down her cheek. She sighs happily as my lips and tongue meet the sensitive skin of her neck and we get lost in each other—forgetting every worry we have and rejoice in the slow meeting of our flesh as one.

* * *

"Mr. Foster, Miss. Baxter please take a seat, can I offer you any refreshments, bottled water, coffee, tea, juice?" The receptionist asks us as she guides us into what must be Mr. Grey's office. We take a seat on a massive bottle green chesterfield couch, which is surprisingly quite comfortable.

"Would you like anything love?" Michael asks me and I smile at him and then at the lovely receptionist. "Can we both have bottled water please, still if you have it?" He tells her and she leaves, promising to be right back with our water. I breathe deeply and sigh—trying to get rid of all this tension.

"Love, everything will be fine… please look at me?" He tilts my chin up and to the side until I meet his penetrating gaze. "I promise nothing and no one will tear us apart, I know you're scared, I am too, but it's not healthy for the kids to be in Diane's presence any more. I don't want her to influence the way they grow up, I don't want them to turn into a power hungry social climbers like the woman who gave birth to them. You may not be their mother biologically but they have your heart, your spirit and your compassion Elle—they will be happy with us, the four of us will be a family together." He whispers and I feel my eyes tear up and my lip starts to tremble. "Honey please don't cry." He whispers sadly, his thumbs brushing away my tears.

"I'm just scared… you know, what if you get the petition filed and the judge refuses it—she'll be informed and then she might keep me away from the kids, I can't stand the thought of not being there for Lexi… she's my daughter not Diane's and I'm terrified that I'm going to lose her, I'm terrified that I'll lose Rylie and James and I'm even more terrified that I'm going to lose you." I bury my face into his neck as my tears flow faster than I've ever felt before. I can't bear the pain of losing those three children. The bond I have with Lexi is much deeper than what I have with the boys but I love them the same amount as I do my little girl. I'm so confused and afraid for what's to come but I also don't have the will to tell him to call it off—we need to get the kids permanently and then I can relax.

"Shh… it's going to be okay. If Mr. Grey thinks that it'll be extremely difficult to be granted the petition then we'll go back to the drawing board and try what Ana suggested. We have enough witnesses love, Ana and Christian heard the wicked things Diane said that day although with their recent altercation I'm sure they'll be discredited and have little positive effect. What we do have though... is you, Leah and Brianne—you have all witnessed the way Diane parents—or doesn't parent—the children. That has to count for something. We can get through this Elle, I won't allow us to fail." He says the words with such conviction that I find it hard to doubt him in this moment. I pull back when he pulls a handkerchief from his slacks pocket and lovingly wipes away my tears.

"I love you and I'm sorry for doubting that we can win. We have to win." I say in a rough emotional voice and give him a watery smile, and his answering one is almost blinding in its intensity.

A few moments later the receptionist returns with our water and Mr. Carrick Grey follows in behind her carrying his briefcase. He lays it down at the side of his desk and comes over to introduce himself.

"Hello, I'm Carrick Grey… you are Mr. Foster I presume?" He says as he shakes Michael's hand.

"Yes, you presume correct… I'm very pleased to meet you Mr. Grey." Michael tells him and Mr. Grey turns to meet me and shakes my hand.

"Hello I'm pleased to meet you Mr. Grey… I'm Eleanor Baxter, Alexia's nanny." I try to smile but I can tell that I don't quite succeed.

"Please, both of you call me Carrick." He smiles at us.

"Please call us by our first names also." I smile at him.

"I apologize for being late once again, I was in court and regretfully things took longer than anticipated and unfortunately that's the nature of the beast called law. My son gave me some basic information when I seen him yesterday but I'd like you both to refresh my memory in your own words and perspective from the beginning. In matters such as these, the winning is often in the details so if you could start at the beginning" He says as he removes his suit jacket and drapes it over his seat before sitting down behind his desk and grabs a legal pad—no pun intended—out of his briefcase to take notes.

"I met Diane when we were both attending Penn State. I had attended Harvard after I graduated high school, I had studied finance there, and immediately went to work for my fathers company but I didn't like it. I didn't like advising rich people on how to spend their money. So I made the decision to go back to school and focus on numbers, I majored in Accounting and minored in economics. Diane was majoring in economics, and was there on a full scholarship—she originally comes from a small farming town in Ohio, hell she grew up on a farm, not that anyone would believe it now. I said that I was there on a scholarship too because once people found out that you come from aristocratic society, they change around you… they stop seeing you as a person and start to view you as a possible payday. I learned that the hard way in Boston. A girl I'd met, we had fun together until she told me she was pregnant… but there wasn't a baby, she just wanted access to the family money." Michael scoffs and shakes his head. I'd never heard their story—I'd never wanted to before, because it would have just proved too hard to listen to. Now I could, because I was secure in the fact that Michael is choosing me. He's chosen me and he's loved me from afar, just as I have loved him.

"When I met Diane and we started dating, our relationship was passionate and fun, we had a good time together; neither of us saw our relationship as anything serious at the time. Just before we graduated, my feelings and Diane's began to change; we'd gotten serious without ever having known it, we'd lived in an apartment together since the beginning of junior year, but the both of us looked at it more like we were roommates rather than a serious couple. One night, just before we finished up our junior year Diane and I were sitting having a glass of wine when we both confessed our feelings for each other. Diane suggested that we moved to New York and get jobs so we could start our new life together. I didn't know how to tell her that I'd already started the plans for my business in Seattle, which is where my parents had just moved. We were originally based Chicago, my father had just had a massive heart attack when my mother put her foot down and told him that he needed to take a step back from the company and my eldest brother took over with his wife and our sister. I was never interested in going back into the family business… even though it's one of the most successful financial companies in Chicago… I wanted my success to be solely mine and not on the back of my family and their ancestors." Michael says and then frowns as he and I both notice the smile on Carrick's face before he chuckles. He looks and us, and realizes we're not in on what appears to be the joke.

"Sorry, it's just the same speech I received from my son, Christian many years ago. He said the exact same thing; you both have a lot in common. He wanted to be successful in his own right and it appears both of you exceeded all expectations on that front." Carrick says after clearing his throat and I notice Michael smile. "So what happened next?" He asks.

"Well I suggested that we should probably visit our parents and talk with them about what we wanted to do next. I thought that because she had been a wonderful, happy… down to earth girl and we had a wonderful relationship, nothing would change once she learned the amount of zero's on the end of my families bank balance." He sighs heavily and grabs onto my hand. I thread my fingers through his and squeeze tightly, silently giving him support.

"On the way to the airport, I decided to attempt to prepare her on what was waiting for us. I'd told my parents of my impending visit and that I was bringing along my girlfriend of three years with me, I told them that they were probably going to be meeting their future daughter-in-law. They were both excited, even though they had more money than god, they weren't like most old money families who thought that only 'rich people' were appropriate marrying material—if I was in love with her and she with me, then in the eyes of my parents she was perfect. My parents sent the private jet to pick us up and bring us to Seattle. So in the car, I held her hand and explained everything calmly… that I came from old money but that I hoped it wouldn't change anything, that she would still want to be with me. I don't think she believed me until we pulled up on the runway where the jet was waiting for us. When we got to my parents, my brother David and his wife Lorrie was there along with their kids, my sister Melinda and her husband Rick was also there. At the end of the visit, my parents sat me down and asked if she was really who I wanted to spend my life with, they shared their fears that she was only there for the money. I freaked out and told them that she never knew about the money until we were on our way to the airport. Just as we were finishing our discussion Diane came running into the room crying saying that my brother and sister tried to give her a check for $100,000 if she agreed to leave and never come back. To say I was livid was a gross understatement. My brother and sister soon followed Diane into My father's office and we were all yelling and accusing each other left, right and center. David said that the only reason he and Melinda did that was because he heard Diane on the phone to someone saying that she'd hit the jackpot big time and that there was no way in hell that she'd ever walk away now, and to think that she was going to end things after this trip and how she was thanking the sun, moon and stars that she didn't. In hindsight, I should have listened to my family but then I wouldn't have three wonderful children nor would I have Elle." Michael sighs and I feel tears track down my face at the thought of how she has treated him, all for money. If she'd just tried to retain a little of her humanity, and love him and the life he'd given her but she didn't. Michael cups my cheek and brushes away my tears before pulling me into his arms and continuing.

"My father stood up from his desk and yelled at everyone to shut up. He told my brother and sister that their actions were deplorable and unacceptable, he made them apologize to both Diane and I. Then he turned to Diane and asked her if she was saying that his son and daughter were lying about the conversation and she insisted that they were. He asked if I planned to marry Diane and I told him that I would if she'd have me. I had never seen her smile so brightly. Then my dad said that if his son and daughter were lying as she'd said they were, that Diane wouldn't mind singing her rights away to the family money and signing a prenup just as his other son and daughters spouses had. Looking back at it, she wasn't clearly in favor of that idea but she had no way of getting out of it without proving David and Melinda's claim. When I'd told my parents that I was bringing a girl home and that I thought she'd be the one… my father had immediately called the family lawyer and had the papers drawn up. We got everything signed and notarised during the trip and I bought a massive rock of an engagement ring. We got married and I started my company… it was a few years before we got successful—not that we suffered because I had an allowance in excess of $20,000 a month— it took a while but slowly more and more influential people started using our services and eventually I had a company that was at least level with my fathers." He sighs heavily and wraps his arm around my shoulders, running his fingers up and down my bare shoulder gently.

"When we got engaged we went house hunting and Diane found the monstrosity of a house she lives in now… she fell in love with its grandeur, its status. She said it was perfect for us, I added that it was perfect to raise a family, looking back I should have worried when she didn't respond to my addition. Seven months and a high society affair of a wedding later, things started to change." Michael says and it's almost like he's in a trance. If he wasn't touching me, trying to soothe the aching wound that listening to his relationship history has created I'd be worrying right now.

"How did things change, was it an over night thing or was it a slow process?" Carrick asks, his pen never stops moving as he takes pages and pages of notes, even though he's recording this meeting with one of those miniature Dictaphones—only it's the digital version without the little tape since it has a usb port protruding from the end of it.

"It's hard to say whether it was overnight or a slow process. All I know is that Diane changed from a small town sweetheart into a socialite. There were always appointments, here there and everywhere… hair extensions, nail extensions, make-up, personal shoppers who bought hundreds of thousands of designer clothing. You name it, she wanted it… and I didn't even mind because when all was said and done, behind closed doors she was still that sweet girl I fell madly in love with. I wanted to make her happy, you know? Give her everything she didn't have growing up on that small farm in Ohio." He squeezes my hand and reaches over to kiss my temple, almost as if he instinctively knows I am struggling with listening to this. I never knew their relationship was good in the beginning, hell I thought it was mostly an arranged marriage, completely loveless and it kind of smarts to know that once upon a time, he did love her… he was madly in love with her. I feel my eyes well up but I manage to keep the tenuous grip on the tears that I refuse to allow them to fall.

"After four years of marriage, I brought up the prospect of children. She knew I wanted a family because just after we got engaged, we'd discussed it. She said that when we eventually got married and enjoyed just the two of us being together, being us for a few years… we would have a couple of kids. You know, after we'd bought a nice house with a white-picket fence, we could even get a dog—the American dream, right? But things didn't work out that way. We'd been married for almost three years, we'd travelled—we had our fun, just being us. So one night, I decided to sit down with her over dinner and talk about our plans for the future. I sent her out to her favorite salon; I booked her in for the full works, I even booked her in for a massage while I was home, cooking our favorite meal. I set up the dinning room; I bought two-dozen red and white roses. I also got one pale pink rose, and one pale blue to represent the children of our future." He scoffs and shakes his head.

"Michael, are you okay?" I ask him as my hand glides along his forearm, I clasp his hand tightly in mine and squeeze to try and offer him some reassurance.

"No, I'm not… but with you in my life… I know I will be." He smiles sadly at me and leans over to kiss my forehead.

"In hindsight, I shouldn't have forced her to have my children. When I asked if she was ready to try for a baby, she told me that she wasn't and that she didn't think that she ever would be ready to get fat and become just someone's mother, I should have just either accepted that I'd never be a father or end the marriage. I tried for weeks to convince her that we wouldn't need to give up attending the benefits and functions that she adored. I told her that all she needed to do was stop drinking champagne and cocktails for nine months and then she could go right back to having fun. We'd use formula, we could get a nanny so that she could maintain her social life—but she didn't want to be a mother at all. One night we were discussing it again and I was going over all the things we could do to make it easier on her but she wasn't listening. I reminded her that she agreed that she wanted kids and I wanted to know why things changed. She told me that if she hadn't agreed to have my children, I wouldn't have married her. She admitted that she only said she wanted children so that I would." He has my hand in his death grip and it's beginning to hurt but I refuse to let his go. He needs me, his eyes are glazed and he still seems like he's in another world, reliving the worst of his marriage.

"I walked out of the house and immediately went to my parents in a state. I always wanted kids, I had the best childhood and I loved my niece and nephew more than I thought possible. I wanted that for myself, I saw what my siblings had and I wanted it too. My parents sat and calmly listened to everything that had happened and after I was finished telling them, my father went into his filing cabinet and pulled out the original prenup he had her sign that day at their house, and the updated one he had drafted prior to our marriage. There was an heir clause written into it. My father advised her to get a lawyer to overlook the documents for her own interest but she refused, the dollar signs that marrying me would bring must have blinded her. It said that she had to provide me with at least two children, with the possibility of a third if we had all girls or all boys. If she refused to adhere to the clause, I could walk away from the marriage and she would be left with nothing. I called her and advised her to seek council because she had two options, refuse to give me children and walk away with nothing, or stay married and have kids. It was completely up to her. She couldn't believe that I was going to throw away a perfect woman like her all for a couple of messy, vomiting, shitting machines. I told her to get a lawyer so that they could go through the ironclad prenup she signed. No children, no marriage, no money." He chuckles humourlessly "Obviously the lure of the money worked its charm on her. Six months later, we were pregnant with our son Riley… then James came along a year later. I was more than happy with two sons and I didn't want to push Diane for a baby girl but I really wanted to have a daughter. Once the boys were older and more independent I started to get a little antsy for another little one, and Diane done her duty, she got pregnant and luckily enough Alexia came into the world. I tried to make Diane happy, I tried to give her everything she ever wanted but it wasn't enough. Even before we had the kids she'd changed, she'd started partying with her socialite friends all the time, she was always out shopping, lunching, going for mani-pedi's with her friends, girls nights out. There was always something to avoid staying in the house. When Riley came along, I decided to keep my word and hire a nanny so that Diane still had her life, but I regretted it because it enabled her to have nothing to do with any of the kids, unless it was for a charity function or publicity for the company… then she was the worlds best and most attentive mother. In the last three years she's gotten progressively worse towards them though. When I walked in on her screwing around with some guy, I'd just had enough. I couldn't stand living the lie anymore. To everyone on the outside, we were a perfect family. I had a perfect wife and she was a perfect mother. She couldn't be worse to our kids if she tried, she constantly criticises them, demeans them and is generally just a horrible parent. I always suspected she was being unfaithful over the years but I guess I just didn't care. I had my kids and they made me happy and I also had a great friendship with Ellie—and up until last week, that's all it was. When it comes to how she treats the kids, I never thought that the way she acted was abuse, not until Christian, Ana and Elle pointed it out. I want her out of our lives, I want a divorce and I want custody of my children… please, just tell me what I have to do, to make that happen?" He asks Carrick, his voice hoarse and desperate for answers.

"Thank you for sharing all the details with me. I am confident that a judge would grant a petition for temporary custody. Miss. Baxter, is there anything you can add, anything that would help us, however small it may seem to you now?" He asks and I can't help but wring my fingers together nervously. There is something, and it's pretty huge. I just don't know how to say it.

"Elle, is there something… you can tell me anything love, no matter what, nothing changes between us… all in, remember?" Michael says as he places his hand over mine to still them and I take a deep breath.

"All in. Just, please… don't be mad at me, because I can't lose you. I just can't." I whisper. He pulls me closer to him and tucks me into his side, his arm wrapped tightly around me. The only way I can say what I have to, is if I talk directly to Carrick because I don't want to hurt Michael.

"Well… ever since Michael moved out, Diane has been going out a lot, picking up guys and bringing them back to the house. There's one that she has been seeing regularly for months, even when Michael and Diane were still together. That's the guy Michael caught her with… he kind of makes me feel uncomfortable, like there's something not quite right with him. Leah and Brianne, don't like him either, we take the kids into our apartment and keep them in there whenever he's around. One night a few weeks ago, I went upstairs to grab the kids' laundry from their bedrooms when I walked passed Diane's room and I saw them in a compromising position, they were… they were snorting cocaine off each others bodies, well that's what I thought it was. It was a white powder, after Diane snorted it with money rolled up into a tube; she licked it off this guy's stomach—which is what made me even surer that it was cocaine. Later on that night, she came downstairs and she was acting all shifty and jumpy. She had the powder all over her nose. She is also drinking heavily at the weekends."

"God damn it—" Michael yells as he gets up and starts pacing. Immediately tears burn in my eyes and I try to swallow the sob that's threatening to break free of my chest.

"She told me it was only a one-time thing. She told me she'd never before and she'd never do it again!" He yells as he clasps his hands over his head, pacing.

"So she's used drugs in the past, when was this?" Carrick asks.

"Maybe six months ago, she'd withdrew a large amount of funds from one of the accounts I opened for her to put money into, so she could shop and have fun—since she refused to get a job with my company. She was a 'lady of leisure' apparently. I asked her what she'd done with the money—she said it was none of my business, she was out having fun with her friends and I should try it once in a while. We argued and I stormed into my study. I worked for a couple of hours and decided I should go find her and apologize. I put money into the account for her to spend so I shouldn't have been asking her what she spent her own money on. I found her in the bathroom, snorting cocaine off the counter. She swore it was a one time thing." I can hear the tears in his voice so I get up and walk over to him. I slowly slide my hand up and down his back to comfort him, when he immediately turns around and crushes me to his chest. He buries his head into my neck and cries, harrowing sobs escape him and it makes me cry too.

Once we calm down a little I quietly guide him back to the couch so that we can continue our meeting and get some advise on where to go from here. We hold each other closely as Carrick reads over his notes, and once he's done he looks up at us with a small smile.

"You both remind me of my son and daughter-in-law's relationship. I think you are looking at a positive outcome in this. Michael, who is handling your divorce proceedings?" Carrick asks.

"Well I consulted with the family attorney but he's more corporate law, so he passed the case onto one of his acquaintances. Is there any way you'd agree to take on the entire case?" Michael tells him as he plays with my fingers, most notably running his thumb over my bare ring finger.

"I was just about to suggest that it would be in your best interest and the children's best interest for one firm to handle the entire divorce and custodial arrangements. Now, I feel like we have a strong case. If you could give me a copy of the waver to family funds that your wife signed and the prenup, I will go over it. My plan is to let all this information sink in, and make sure I have everything straightened out in before we proceed. The suspected drug use is our ace card. All we have to do is file for temporary custody on the grounds of an unfit mother whom is under the influence of drugs and/or alcohol. The court will ask Mrs. Foster to provide a hair follicle sample to test; the test will show any drug use from between three to six months after ingestion. If she should refuse the test, then it's just a point in our favor, which would then give grounds for a court ordered one. If she were to test positive, then it could be a deciding factor in the custody agreement. I am assuming you want her parental rights relinquished?" He asks and at this point I'm starting to feel really overwhelmed by the vast amount of information we're received in the last hour.

"Yes, I don't want her influence around my kids any longer. She's never been a mother to them. The reason I have decided to go down the legal route, instead of coming to an agreement ourselves is because I know she'll use our children as a bargaining chip to acquire a steak in my company. I think it's detrimental to their overall mental health if they are in her vicinity." Michael responds in a sure, strong voice. He is at peace with his decision and now all we want to do is to get the ball rolling.

"I would highly suggest that you hire a private investigator that specialises in child custody cases. The more evidence we have, the easier the choice the judge has to make. It all rests on him deciding if our petition and ultimately the custody agreement are granted or not. Now, I want you to write a parenting plan, it's part of the courts proceedings. They want to know what you have in mind for the child's immediate needs and long-term needs. Like what schools they'll go to, what will change if they are in your custody rather than your wife's etcetera, etcetera. This won't be easy, but I am confident that we can win, although it could get messy. There will be a lot of allegations and mud slinging. Are you prepared for that?" He asks, but at the last part he looked directly into my eyes, as if he was directing the question at me.

"Yes, I am more than prepared. Nothing happened between Michael and I while I worked for him. We didn't have an affair and as long as we keep the public façade of my continued role as Nanny to Lexi, then we don't have to explain my presence in his life." I answer in a confident, though quite shaky voice.

"Alright then. If you could send me those documents straight away, either fax them over to me, email them or hand deliver them. The quicker I get the documents, the faster I can petition. Have you thought of what type of settlement you will be willing to give to Mrs. Foster?" He asks and Michael sighs.

"I have, I was thinking of signing over the house she and the kids live in right now… and also a heavy cash settlement. I just want her out of my life. She can keep the house, and everything inside it—she can have anything she wants, material wise. I just want to be free of her." Michael turns to look at me and places a gentle kiss to my forehead.

"Okay, I think that concludes everything for today. Please make sure to give me those documents. Please make an appointment to come in and chat with me, I will need a couple of days, so lets book you in for October 20th, the petition should be ready by then, and we can file for temporary custody. Just inform the receptionist and she will book you in. I will see you in a couple of days." He tells us with a gentle smile.

"Thank you Carrick, for taking the case on at such short notice." Michael states as he shakes Carrick's hand before he switches and begins to shake mine.

"It's honestly no problem. Any friend of Christian and Ana's is a friend of mine." We say our goodbyes and head for the appointment desk. We get the appointment booked and take a note of it before heading outside.

We quickly jump into the car to escape the pouring rain and once we're seated… we both release a heavy sigh of slight relief. It isn't over yet… it's only just beginning but somehow, with the strength of the woman sitting on my right, I know I'll be okay, we'll be okay as a family.

* * *

**A/N: **_I am so sorry this took too long. There was a lot of legal research for this chapter and I wanted to at least attempt to get the procedure factually accurate. As things vary state by state, I did the best I could with my limited knowledge of the US legal system._

_Please leave me a review if you have time—they inspire me to continue to write. I have a lot of ideas for this story and they are brewing up a storm in my head right now. Damn plot bunnies. _

_I hope you liked it and are still excited about this story. _

_Love & Laughs  
~Susie, xoxo_


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