Dallas 1. Start of a Beautiful Friendship

Ann skidded off her bike and tried to straighten the creases on her pink dress. The color was faded and could easily show off any stains that she might have got on the way. She inspected it carefully and then looked around the empty stone yard. There appeared to be no bike stands. And why would there be, at a brothel? She threw her head back and sighed at the stormy skies above. Not wanting to leave her only ride up for grabs, she strolled around the corner and safely hid it in the first bush that came her way.

_Please stay there._ She motioned with her hands.

She walked back towards the door, trying to keep her eyes focused on the one single goal. _Be humble on the outside, but on the inside, be more self-assured than you have been in your whole life. And then, get the money._

Seeing the massive house in full filled her with cold fear. Curtains were drawn on every window but she could guess the inside was anything but dead and quiet. A dark, handsome mobster looking guy cracked the door open and eyed her suspiciously.

"Ann Smith." She said, as had been instructed.

He moved to the side without saying a word but his eyes remained glued to her. They weren't very helpful and Ann was hoping he would give her a hint on the next step so that she wouldn't have to improvise. An older man rested his eyes on her despite the fact there was a blond doe eyed girl giving him her full attention. Should she smile? She decided to escape the situation and hopefully at some point by accident end up in the right room.

There were puffy velvet curtains keeping the place hidden from general public and the large chandeliers brought rich light to the lounge. It wasn't very homely and yet it wasn't intimidating either. It felt like being a guest in an old relative's house where a bunch of estranged cousins were visiting, some of which were trying to picture her naked by the looks of it. She picked up her pace and found the office at the back seconds before panic was starting to set in. She knew this was a bad idea but she couldn't afford to feel the totality of her decision right now.

_Remember what daddy said. The power of mind soars above all the rest._

There was a lump in her throat that had failed to warn her first.

_It didn't save your heart now did it?_

* * *

It was hard to find the madam under the fountain of wavy peroxide blond hair and hugely ruffled black sleeves but when Ann finally did meet her piercing gaze, she wished to look elsewhere.

"How tall are you?"

_Why am I not surprised?_

"6 feet. And that's as far as I'll grow." She attempted a smile but then stopped. Judith's lips twitched as if they were telling a story of their own between the questioning.

"And what do you call yourself?"

"Ann…"

"Not your real name." Judith raised her voice and then took a deep breath. "What do you want your clients to call you?"

Ann found herself forgetting the entire English language. Not a single name popped into her head at a time of emergency.

"Emerald it is." Judith scribbled down in large but neat cursive and Ann surrendered to the idea.

"Do you have accessories, clothing?"

"I don't think so...I have this." Ann spread out the hem of her dress.

Judith's eyes widened. "You'll be using the leftovers until you make enough money to buy your own. The closet is upstairs across the hall, when time calls for it."

"I'd be using other girls' old underwear?" She asked in disbelief.

"Seeing what you're wearing now, and I dread to think what lies underneath it, I didn't think it would be a problem. This is not a charity. If you work hard, you will make good money and invest it in things that will bring more _good money_, to you and me both. I'll be the best friend you'll ever have."

"I don't..." At the last moment Ann decided to keep quiet about the reason she had needed to come here in the first place, and why she couldn't afford to spend her first earnings on "accessories". If she had learned anything at her previous jobs, it was that the boss would be the farthest thing from a friend.

Judith slid the piece of paper over to her side of the desk and held out the pen.

"Now please be a dear and fill out this form accurately. It's a list of things you are willing to do and it can be updated later when you gain more experience."

Ann eyed the pen as if it was poisonous first and then softly picked it from Judith's hand. Nothing she had ever read had made her as uncomfortable before, not even the back cover of a certain novel she had once found in her mother's night stand. The further down she got on the list, the more she felt like she was being strangled.

"Umm _fisting?_" She asked, afraid to stare at one question too long.

"Just tick no." Judith replied as her eyes shifted sideways in boredom.

When Ann was done, she slid the form back and thought up a few additions to her nightly prayers. Judith put on a pair of huge red glasses and read through the list, glancing at her prospect three times as she proceeded. With each look Ann shrank in her chair a little more.

The silence went on for a while after the paper was set back down on the desk. Ann felt the woman's eyes bore into her soul, possibly trying to bring a little blackness to it. Was it too late to run? She had come this far after all. Judith seemed to be wondering the same thing as she put the glasses away.

"If I sent a client in right now, would you do number 12 to him?"

Ann opened her mouth and then tried to keep her eyes from doing their relentless dance. She glanced down to see what was written on the form.

"Yes." she finally said, short of breath. Judith was doing her intense stare again which made Ann double guess her own words.

"Would you do it well?" She rose from her seat.

"Yes." Ann replied with less hesitation. If only Matthew Clark had asked for it. Who knew that sad little session behind the basketball field last summer would have proven to be so vital a year later?

_I'm a woman, I can wing it. _

Judith was now beside her and motioned for her to get up to which she hurriedly obliged.

"You don't have any nasty surprises under that, do you? We have a client satisfaction guarantee and trust me, you don't want a dead granddaddy inside you, or on your resume." Judith pointed at her as if there were flies coming from under her dress. Was her best one really that bad? Resisting the urge to follow the finger, she kept her eyes strictly on Judith.

"I'm more than happy to show if you'd like a visual."

Judith's lips slowly curved into smile. Her face was too close and Ann felt as though her neck would cramp soon from holding it back that crucial inch. To her relief the struggle was short lived as Judith moved back a little, seemingly undressing her with her eyes and at the same time perfectly focused.

"Besides the obvious, I have three rules. One: you don't show up to work intoxicated. Two: you don't question my authority and most importantly number three..." She turned a picture frame towards them and moved behind her where she spoke so close to her ear, Ann felt it burn. "This is my son. He's off limits. You don't speak to him in private, you don't take his money and you don't say a word of this conversation to him. If you do..." Ann stiffened as Judith stroked her hair behind her. "...I can guarantee, you will be sorry."

The young man in the picture had kind eyes, which was all Ann saw in the short time she dared to look. She found it difficult to believe the two were related.

"Sounds reasonable." She tried to sound convincing but was glad the madam could not see her face at that moment.

Judith returned to her seat behind the desk and let her eyes rest on the new asset. There were no words to describe how incapable the girl was and the insecurity that welled from her irritated her to the point of exhaustion. But with the right schooling she could bring in the coveted high end business, the girlfriend experience, overnights...as much as she hated the form it arrived in, Judith knew she had hit a gold mine. This girl was as attractive as she was clearly desperate for money. Easily broken and easily kept. _Jackpot._

* * *

Rain slowly filled the old wheelbarrow that stood abandoned in the midst of overgrown grass that told of time that had passed. Was it really that long? Ann reluctantly shifted her eyes from the spot where her father had drawn his last breath and opened the three large locks that were not enough to protect them from anyone dumb enough to attempt a break in to their dilapidated house but which her mother had insisted on getting anyway.

Grace was resting in front of the TV, holding her bad foot on a stack of books, newspapers and towels that Ann had piled up to her preference. At first glance she knew her mother had not moved all day.

"Mom," she started, keeping her voice hopeful. "I got that other job."

She turned her head around and had a strangely serene smile on her face. "That's wonderful. Just make sure you don't overwork yourself. We can manage."

"I don't want to manage. I want you to get that surgery and then we can do all the things we planned to do as a family."

Grace shook her head. "I know you have big dreams Annie, so don't waste them on me. That is money you will never make, not even with three jobs."

It was that same old attitude. Ann put on her mental shield so that the words would not bring her down and drain her of the strength she so desperately needed from now on. "You can say that all you want but I've made up my mind. You will get that surgery."

_And then we can be happy again._

Grace still held the same unwavering expression. "I wish I could have provided you with so much more. With your brain and ambition you should be in college, not here helping out little old me."

"We're family. It's what we do and trust me mom, nothing is more important." She insisted softly, not liking the melancholic tone. It made her feel sick inside.

"You know, sometimes I wish I hadn't raised you so well. Kindness can lead to all sorts of trouble."

_You should know. _

"I'm a big girl now, so don't you worry. I'll always be fine."

Ann lay down on the couch pretending to be interested in how MacGyver was going to solve a hostage situation but her mind was already on the following night. It was a make-or-break for Emerald.


	2. Time to Shine

The dry pavement rumbled under her smooth two inch heels as she neared the unknown again. She had hidden the bike further down the road, embarrassed that she stood out from the other girls who appeared to be arriving in cabs and it much nicer clothes than the old dress she had no choice but to wear again. The doe eyed blond jumped out of the cab that had just pulled in when Ann stepped on the property. Should she say hi? Make a friend and possibly get some survival tips? Now that she knew her number one confidante would be the creepy madam, she didn't feel too sure about her chances to last there as long as she needed to. However long that was. She figured the counting would have to begin at a less depressing number than zero.

"Hi you, what's your name?" The girl chirped like a little bird. Her hair was blond and wavy and just like Ann's, it flowed a few inches over her slender shoulders.

_She must be popular. _

"I'm…" Ann stopped and considered.

"Your real name." The blonde laughed.

"Ann, but they call me Emerald."

"Lucky you. I'm Sherri but they call me Swallow.

Ann's eyes bulged and she coughed.

"It's all about first impressions and that goddamn form." Sherri continued, a little amused by the new girl's reaction. "If I could do the interview again, I'd certainly emphasize different points. But it is what it is."

A woman taller than Ann passed them both in a skimpy red dress. Or was it a man? The broad shoulders made Ann skeptical and she wanted to ask Sherri about this, as well as her reasons for choosing this occupation but the moment had passed and they both headed for the house for their 5 pm to 5 am shift.

* * *

After rushing through the public area as fast as she could, Ann took the stairs up and with a quick glance spotted the closet. It was hard to imagine a way to get further out of her comfort zone but she bit her lip and forced her mind to rise above the situation.

_They are only people. This is only a house. It's a job like all the rest._

She tried to slap the redness of her cheeks and grabbed a few colorful pieces of the rack. Then she checked the way was clear and entered the first room on the right, her chamber for the night.

It was very homely, the trademark chandelier and big velvet curtains framed the centerpiece that was the bed. It had a thick red cover and large wooden headboard, the prettiest bed she had seen in her entire life. Ann threw her findings on it and inspected what she had. The green dress would go with her product, credit to Judith, and the black underwear might be a smart choice. She pulled her own dress off and stripped down. When she had the lace bra, panties and stockings on, she picked up the sleek garter belt. It was the first time she had even seen one and it looked a little complicated. Unnecessary? Just as she started placing the thing on her hips, the door swung open and she was faced with the madam's empty expression, that from her recent experience she knew could change into anything, give it a second or two. She didn't move as Judith approached her.

"If you plan on showing up here looking like that, please use the back door." Judith snapped the belt on Ann without looking her in the eye and then started clipping the suspenders to the black lace on her stockings. Ann didn't know where to look.

"A little frigid, are you?" Pulling her hand, Judith escorted her further back and pushed her on the bed. The huge hem of her black dress rustled all the way down to the floor while her bosom was about to pop out from the generous neckline. Ann tried to retreat to gain a little space between the two of them but Judith latched her nails onto her inner thigh, so high up it made her gasp. When she was still, Judith loosened her grip slightly but brought her face up close.

"It helps to pleasure yourself before you go down there. Nothing draws them like wet pussy."

Ann parted her lips in an attempt to catch her breath when Judith brought her finger to her mouth. She slid it round and round, smudging it with the pink lipstick, and then sucked on it. Ann had frozen still.

"Think about it, but don't take too long before you go and mingle. There are a few here who haven't made their pick yet."

"Can't you just assign me someone?" She managed to say as her heart pounded.

"You really are green, aren't you?"

* * *

Down in the lounge there were a few men getting comfortable with the woman of their choosing as Ann landed the stairs. She looked down at the scanty dark green dress she had on. It would have been short on any girl but for her it barely covered the slings, and with the heels she was wearing, she already felt like her legs were taller than most people.

_Remember, they are here for the women. I can fit in just as well as anyone here. And daddy, please shut up._

She headed for the bar for her orange juice, which she knew she couldn't drink. Her stomach was in knots and once she had her hands safely on the counter, she could barely look around. The glass stood there in front of her, just as lonely. What was the next step? She felt like a cat wandering on a motorway during rush hour.

A man came to stand next to her.

_Phew._

He was balding, middle-aged and wearing a worn out leather jacket, possibly holding more money in his pockets that he led on. Ann then realized she was not supposed to be thinking of any of that.

_Eye on the prize._

"Hi, I'm Emerald." She introduced herself with a sweet smile.

"Mike." He replied, sounding comfortable as if he had been there many times before.

Then there was silence. Was she supposed to come up with a pointless conversation while he made up his mind? Surely she would not be expected to suggest…

"Swallow at your service, sir." The chirpy voice spoke as red manicured nails crawled their way up from behind his shoulder pad. His head turned instantly.

"I like the sound of that. Let's go baby bird."

The two of them had disappeared before Ann could get a word in. That's how it worked then? She was fuming and swore she would eat the tiny blond bitch for breakfast the next day. That is, if the girl didn't manage to hide behind a tea cup.

Ann grabbed her glass and turned from the bar, never in her life as determined to get laid before. Maybe she should have taken Judith's chilling advice.

_Cool down…just a little._

She spotted a man reading a newspaper at an armchair on the other side of the room and tried to compose herself as she walked over. Maybe he wasn't looking for company right now but there was no one else left and it didn't hurt to sell herself in advance, right?

He lowered the paper and eyed her with curiosity. A young man, strong features, tailored suit…was she out of her league here? Ann stepped beside him so that he could have a good look at her finest assets that the heels elongated. Her blond waves framed her eyes and made them pop out when she didn't break eye contact, just as she had practiced in front of the mirror.

_No thinking._

"Hi, I'm Emerald." She didn't have to force the smile this time. It happened as a response to something she wasn't quite sure about. A grin slowly formed on his lips too, but was it lustful or just smug?

"I see it." He winked.

It was like a soft thud to her chest. She licked her lips and sat down on the armrest, letting her leg slide down the sharp crease of his black pants.

"How do you like to play?" She asked, slowing down and looking him straight in the eye. It was so hard to tell what they were saying which made her all the more curious to find out.

"Long and hard, darlin'. And in secret."

His lips were so tempting. Why wasn't he making a move?

"Go." He whispered.

Ann looked puzzled as he motioned her to leave again, this time firmly.

"Emerald, a word." Judith called behind her, silent enough for only them to hear.

"Mother…"

Ann shot up from the chair, not knowing who to apologize to first. Her face had turned a whole new shade of red.

"Do not speak." Judith hissed and pointed at her to follow. "And Harris…"

Not ending the sentence she simply turned around and Ann followed as graciously as she could.

* * *

It wouldn't have surprised Ann if all the mirrors in the office had exploded into pieces when Judith started her lecture. Every part of her body pulsated with fury, from the bush of white hair to the thin heels that knocked on the wooden floor as she swung at Ann several times.

"I warned you." The threatening voice rose from her depths, so dark and hardly human. Ann had her arms crossed as she tried to feel less naked in the chilly space.

"I'm so sorry. I didn't recognize him."

Judith gasped, a mixture of shock and horror. "I showed you a picture. What exactly did you need, a private tour?"

"It won't happen again. The picture is very clear now."

Judith frowned and turned her back which made Ann feel braver.

"And what do you care anyway? He's not a boy. He's a grown man."

The black eyes turned back and shredded her entire self-esteem for a moment. Judith didn't talk, only moved closer, cutting Ann into pieces with each second until she was up close to her face.

"When a _prostitute_ worms in the lap of your own child, you will understand."

Ann swallowed the hurt that she couldn't hide in her eyes but it wasn't worth saying another word to the stone cold woman who was only waiting for her to break. She turned away and missed the brief smirk on Judith's face.

"By the way, that's gonna cost you an extra hundred."

Ann span on her heels. "But I'm already giving you fifty percent."

"And so far it's still off a big fat zero. Off you go, that room isn't gonna pay for itself."

* * *

"What's your name, beautiful?"

"I'm Emerald."

Third time was the charm and she knew it now. All it took was contact, both eye and body. She smiled playfully and played with the older gentleman's tie as he drowned his drink. They would go up, make a deal and that was all that mattered.

"I'll call you Emmy then." He grinned and turned to place the empty glass on the bar counter. Judith passed her right by her ear.

"Don't you just hate when they miss the point?"

Ann shuddered.

"Go make mama proud, _Emmy_."


	3. Tools for Success

It had been exactly one hour in which time the job had been done twice. The first time she had acted the part of an innocent virgin, college aged, she hoped, but the lines had blurred. Before the second round he had taken his ring off.

Ann pulled her naked body off the bed and started gathering up the tainted sheets. The sins would disappear in the wash, even if they didn't feel so bad right now. The client was gone and so was the moment. Did it even matter anymore? She wrapped a sheet around herself in case Judith would come busting through the door, asking questions about her first client, or possibly accusing her of not doing a good enough job for whatever reason, or maybe just have sex with her this time. It had started to seem like a real possibility.

It had been one hour and she still owed money to the house. It would take another client to finally earn something and then it would be clothes and "accessories"…

_Whoever called this easy money must have been a client themselves._

Ann picked up the rest of the bed linen as well as her clothes and took everything to the small bathroom that was attached to the chamber. When the laundry was out of sight, she took a quick shower and came out refreshed, even if the clothes were still the same. Somehow they felt more comfortable now and not nearly as exposing. Would she be able to go out on her free time and pull this off as Annie? Men had never shown that much interest in her and even here, it didn't seem as if they were seeing _her_. They saw a thing, something they expected to find when they walked through the door and it made her feel even less significant. She did a few poses in front of the wall full of mirrors and tried to bring out someone special who would not be outshined by the petite, barely legals.

* * *

Four hours and two showers later Ann found herself lying on tangled sheets, convinced she would not make it through the shift. There were only so many opportunities to discreetly grab the lube and she was running out of options. It also didn't help that her mind started shifting towards the convenient hiding place during the time she was supposed to devote fully to the client. Ann moaned quietly as she felt the sleep kick in.

_No! Pull yourself together._

She sprang up and rolled the sheets like a maid whose life depended on this particular gig.

* * *

"And that is your cut." Judith flicked each bill as she made the count twice. The strange kissing sound that escaped her lips gave Ann chills. She could hardly keep her eyes open, let alone stand in the room much longer. Even the massive desk between them had started to seem like a tempting surface for a nap, but home was five miles away. She yawned as Judith wiggled the stack of notes under her eyes.

"Wakey wakey."

Ann came out of her haze, startled. Judith smiled, possibly caused by the smell of money.

"You'll learn to make time for sleep outside work. Now, be smart with this money and invest it. When you have the proper tools, you can negotiate higher prices and those will take you to place." She glanced at the puzzled look on Ann's face.

"You do want to be one of my top girls? Those will have longer dates, parties, champagne…you won't find them fishing in the lounge for scraps."

Ann nodded as she took the money, not feeling any of the things Judith listed as much as she craved her shabby mattress back home.

"All slots are filled for tomorrow but come back on Tuesday morning at 5 and wear something pretty."

It didn't sound like a friendly request.

"I will try my best to please you, madam." Ann half yawned and Judith raised her head from the large black book she was scribbling in.

"Let's start with something easy first, and by easy, of course I mean the men."

* * *

The lights in the windows told of a sum of unpleasant truths. Firstly it meant that Rodney was inside, and that was the start of whole other problems. She staggered off the bike, an involuntary groan escaping her lips as the soreness stung again.

The closer she got, the louder the noises were. By the volume she guessed the visit must have started five hours ago and was now close to being over. She looked behind her, now wistfully remembering how peaceful her room at the brothel was, between clients, even with the threat of Judith marching in at any moment. The place seemed like a dream now, but somehow the men became more real with each minute that passed.

She unlocked the door and was met with a full blown fight. Grace was limping and holding onto the wall while Rodney cursed, holding his craggy face in his hands. The stains on his gray t-shirt could have been any kind of dirt but she bet on blood.

_What do I have to do for a good night's sleep? Or who for that matter?_

Her eyes welled up with tears of weariness as she flung her bag in the bathroom and took a few long strides to the battle zone.

"Get out." She ordered, not caring how pathetic she looked with her reddened eyes. His head turned to her and she could now see blood dripping between his fingers. He wore an evil grin that revealed a few missing teeth.

"Look who's home. Busy night?"

"Out." She told him again and pointed to the door that was still open. The cold wind combined with the fatigue and the breath of alcohol on the man made her hair stand on end.

"Don't bother her, Rodney. She works long hours." Grace said absent-mindedly, not putting any power behind her words.

"I bet." He replied as his eyes wandered down Ann's body. She stepped aside to give him one last chance to leave.

"I'll be seeing you."

"_You couldn't afford to."_ She wanted to say when she was finally able to slam the door in his face.

* * *

After spending three hours on a park bench reading, or _waitressing_ as she had told her mother to keep the story believable even on her days off, Ann dropped Callahan's Lady in her purse and stood up on her flat sandals. Her body was taking a well-earned rest but it had to end now. The next stop would be a special kind of a lingerie store that catered for her needs.

There was a wide variety of corsets on display in the window, ranging from classy ones to rather obscene pieces. A green one with red bows caught her attention but when she looked closer at the price tag, it became clear the fun part would have to wait. Ann looked down at her baggy jeans. Would they guess or how would she bring up the topic? She felt a little sick as she stepped in and found herself surrounded by all the pretty underwear when she knew the 40-something librarian looking clerk would soon know her secret.

"Were you looking for anything specific?" The redhead asked, gluing herself to Ann's side. Her name tag said Dolores.

"Yes." Ann's voice was hoarse and she coughed a little. "I'm interested in your _other_ selection."

"What do you mean?"

"I need items…for business."

The clerk's expression changed from innocent to aware and she smiled wickedly.

"Follow me."

She led her behind the counter and pulled the curtain just the slightest bit, ushering Ann to step through. It was a small place and only lit by one floor lamp shaped like a lantern that made the place look like a darkroom. As Ann's eyes adjusted, she noticed the stacks of boxes on each wall. Dolores pulled a few from the piles and peeked through the curtains after each one to keep an eye on the empty store.

"Did you want just the basics?" She asked as she opened the lid of the first box.

"How much for the basics?"

"How much do you have?"

"Let me know the price and then we'll talk." Ann smiled back.

_I'm using your teachings again, daddy. Wouldn't you be proud?_

Dolores grinned and looked down at what she was dealing with, possibly trying to see the body hiding under the loose clothes. Then she held up a pair of fluffy pink handcuffs.

"You'll need these at least, a whip, a mask, nipple clamps and…maybe something sweet?" She took out a bottle that Ann recognized as the kind of chocolate sauce she had used on her mother's birthday cake earlier that year.

"I think I can get that from the nearest convenience store. How much for the rest?"

"You don't want to use those, it's just more mess for you to clean up." The clerk argued. "Take this and you won't regret it. You can have the whole beginner's set for 25."

"_Beginner's set…"_

She had an uncomfortable flashback to the hefty man with a thick mustache who had asked for the clamps. Now she wouldn't have excuses anymore. Was that a common thing? And what was wrong with men in general? The memory and its stains weighed on her as she paid for her purchases and wished her handbag had been big enough to stuff the items in. As discreet as the white plastic bag was, it just didn't feel right swinging on the handlebar as she rode to her next stop. It would have been much more convenient to drop the things off at the brothel but Judith was giving her the most random hours and she had a feeling that work was beginning to control her life.

* * *

Ann let her hand slide through the tiers of exaggerated ruffles that circled the waist of the strapless turquoise dress that had caught her eye instantly. Maybe it would increase her worth in Judith's eyes, or at the very least put her above one of her girls so that their rocky start could be forgotten. As much as Ann didn't want to care about what people thought of her, the looks and the comments that said she was below them hurt deeply. Her father had always worked twice as hard as anyone she knew and that should have counted for something. As she picked the dress off the hanger and headed for the fitting room, she decided that her climb to the top would start tomorrow.

The mirror was kind to her, or maybe it was the first time she had worn something brand new, but either way she felt more confident. Did clothes really make all the difference? She stepped outside to get a better look at the bigger mirror in the fitting room area but there was a couple blocking the view. Judging by what she could see from behind, the man could have been old enough to be the young woman's father but the position of his hand told a different story. Ann felt a bang of jealousy but she couldn't tell if it was for a father or a boyfriend. It was the pain she felt for unattainable things.

It was as if her thoughts had been too loud because his head turned while the unsuspecting woman continued to admire the long asymmetrical evening gown on herself. First Ann recognized the thinning hairline, then the narrow lips and lastly the eyes that at the same time stared at her as they looked past her. He had his wedding ring on too, in the hand that fondled the waistline slower when his eyes bore into hers. Did he mouth _Emmy_?

Ann took a step back and disappeared behind the curtain as fast as she could. Even when the couple's voices had faded, she couldn't leave right away. They weren't supposed to see her, or even exist outside the house. She couldn't look in the mirror again but she bought the dress anyway.

* * *

The smoke wafted around Grace as the cigarette slowly burned in her hand, possibly stolen from Rodney since Ann had never wasted a penny on them. Her robe was open slightly, revealing a faded blue nightgown underneath and Ann couldn't help but think she looked like Paulina Porizkova in a vintage ad glamorizing the life of the homeless. She pulled up by the porch but before she could get off the bike, Grace had stepped forward and taken her personal shopping as well as the groceries off the handlebar.

"No." She let out.

"What? I'll take these in." Her mother mumbled, the cigarette still hanging loosely from her mouth. There was more liveliness to her voice than usual, Ann noted, but it only meant a downfall would follow. She wished she could have let the picture stay as it was but what choice was there? She reached out and tried to grab the bags as the bike fell into the dirt that was their front yard.

They both stared at each other for a while. Then Ann snatched the bags so hard Grace almost lost her balance and clutched at the window frame.

"I'll take care of it." Ann hissed as the guilt banged at her chest. She rushed inside wishing that Grace would follow her yelling and they could have a good old-fashioned fight after she hid the items in her room. For the rest of the night however, there was silence. Grace locked herself in her bedroom and Ann stayed in hers. She hid the rest of the money under the floorboards and then took out the white plastic bag. It rustled loudly in the dim light as she took out one item at a time and imagined the scenarios in which she would use them.

The whip didn't look too harmful when she slid it across her arm and felt the tails slip down one by one. They were soft and smelled of leather. She took off her clothes and lied down on the bed trying to turn into Emerald but it was hard in such a setting and without the fancier outfit. Even when she closed her eyes, the moment didn't come and for a few seconds she panicked. What if she couldn't pull it off now that she knew what to expect? What if more clients started showing up at random places, seeing her, knowing what she was now? She brushed her leg with the whip and slid it upwards, gently and hardly touching until it lay on her bare stomach.

When she closed her eyes again, she saw the madam's son looking at her differently, trying to tell her something, letting her loosen that tie while his chest heaved harder than it had done in that chair…Ann lifted up the whip and lashed at her thighs.

It wouldn't be so bad to do that to one of those men. And who knew, the time might come in seven hours.


	4. Time to not reflect

As Ann slowly dragged her tired feet to the kitchen, she found Grace by the window, looking out over the yard as if she was seeing a dream. The sleepy state quickly turned into a furious one, even if Ann didn't have the energy to fully show it. She took her anger out on the coffee maker.

"You aren't waiting for him to come back, are you?" She asked, tightening the robe that hid her new turquoise dress underneath.

"I'm not, but he will." Grace replied fondly.

Ann snapped the device on in disbelief. "Mom, he's no good for you. He's violent, unstable and he looks like a hobo."

Grace turned to her with glassy eyes. "So what if he is? You think if a man dresses nicely, he's gonna treat you right? Let me tell you a little fact of life. If the outside is spotless, it only means they are that much worse on the inside, because they are smart and there's nothing worse than a smart, beautiful man wanting to hurt you. At least with Rodney I know exactly what I'm getting."

_Same old mind with every new sunrise._

"Why would they want to hurt me?"

"Because they don't deserve you and one day they'll realize it. If you dig deep enough you'll find that we are all insecure little shits, but some of us handle it better than others."

Ann glanced down at the drops of coffee that had started to fill the bottom of the carafe. How many mornings could this last?

"I still think you are making a big mistake." She concluded as she looked at her mother again. "You don't want to end up getting shot dead where daddy once stood."

Grace smiled that empty smile that had always scared her.

"And what makes you so sure he'd be the one behind the trigger?"

* * *

The morning had started off slowly but in a few hours Ann had sent off two satisfied customers and she felt relaxed. Inside the brothel no action could be deemed out of ordinary, no guilt or shame, only her little secret that brought more money than she had ever held in her hands at once. It wasn't even that much work when they were friendly and didn't need encouraging.

She came out of the bathroom in her usual green dress and counted the stack of bills again. It wasn't very much when Judith took her cut but if she started working harder and fitting more clients in, the goal didn't seem so hard to reach. If only she could kick the constant drowsiness between clients. Ann placed the money in the closet and then strapped her heels on. With one last look in the mirror she left the room, determined to be more efficient from now on.

The lounge was quiet with only a few businessmen who were already being entertained and about to disappear into the private area. Ann kept her eye on the door as she took a glass of water from the bar. Sipping it, she stretched her shoulders and shook her unruly curls to the back. 'The bigger the better' seemed to be the aspiration among the girls and she had taken heed.

"I thought you worked the night shift." The deep voice from behind her stated and made her blood run cold. His warm breath brushed her shoulder and made her shiver all the more. What a way to ruin a perfect plan. She turned around and spoke to him as Emerald, the bitchier version.

"Son of a madam, has your mother ever told you that you are bad for business?"

His eyes pierced through her with little effort. Then he looked down and she couldn't tell if it was at her chest or not at her at all.

"It's a bad business but you're a good girl." He lifted his gaze so unexpectedly, she felt short of breath when he continued. "It won't end well for you, so get out while you still can."

Ann straightened herself, creating a little distance between them as she returned to her normal self. No one was supposed to contradict her choices inside the house.

"Look…Harris. I don't need saving. What I do need, is this job, for reasons you will never understand. So please leave before my boss thinks I'm about to drain her son dry."

"Mother is having her 8 am massage by one of the Rivera boys, and that should take about 15 minutes still." Harris glanced at his watch and grimaced as his eyes briefly wandered to the end of the hall.

"And that's enough time for me to make fifty bucks, so again, please leave." Ann turned her back for emphasis but she could still feel him there. In some silent way he was trying to make her think but she refused, knowing how dangerous it was. Her decision had been made while balancing on a thin line.

His smooth hand skidded closer to her on the counter, bringing his presence near.

"If you stay, I can't promise I'll make it easy for you."

She held her breath and looked down at the finely trimmed nails. They were prettier than hers.

"Do you understand?" He blew into her hair so that it tickled her earlobe that was already burning.

At that moment the guard opened the door and let in a young man, taller than her, with a toned body that the fitness wear showed off and a determined look that said he knew what he was looking for. Ann would have hidden by the wall, fading into the tapestry, whereas Emerald rose to the challenge without giving Harris a second look. No competition was present when she walked over to the man, leaving an angry pair of brown eyes behind.

"Good morning. I'm Emerald." She batted her eyelashes extra hard for this one. Her pulse was still a little high but maybe it was a good thing for the job.

He scanned the room quickly and then gave her the same evaluation as well.

"New girl, huh?"

She nodded with a sly smile. "New flavor."

His expression changed but she couldn't read it. It was either hard consideration or excitement in those icy blue eyes.

"Let's go then."

She made him leave his bulky gym bag behind the bar, avoiding Harris who stirred a clearly alcoholic drink in his hand despite the early hour, and then escorted the client up the stairs to her chamber where a fresh new sheet was spread out on the bed.

Harris stared at his glass, then at the hallway, then at the clock that ticked 8:20 am and finally the stairs.

_Don't lose control. Not for a whore._

The wasted words to her cheap ears, how perfectly had that moment played out as his mother had once warned. Now he was an ordinary fool in the eyes of a prostitute and the mistake could never be reversed as long as they both lived. He slammed the glass down with a loud bang that echoed in the empty lounge.

* * *

After they had closed the door, Ann expected the client to deal with the business part without further explanation since it was obvious he knew the place. They stood faced with each other but his wallet remained strictly in his pocket.

"Is there anything specific you would like to request?" She smiled as she tried to ease the tension for both of them.

His lips twitched but he didn't reply. The look on his face had grown colder without her realizing.

"We have to negotiate at first and do the necessary preparations. After that, you won't have to talk if it's how you prefer." Ann tried again, less friendly and more professional.

"I want the deal I have with Carmen. And since she's not available…you'll do what I say."

Ann swallowed quietly. The guy was already worse than the know-it-all customers she had encountered while waitressing.

"I don't know about the terms you have negotiated so you will have to clarify them with me. I apologize for this inconvenience."

She waited, and he did too. The AC hummed above their heads.

"I'll ask again..." She started but something in his eyes made her stop.

He cocked his head and without saying a word placed his hand on her throat, slowly strangling her. Panic flushed all her reason and she tried to grab his arm but he rejected it easily.

"Please…" She gasped, trying to kick but it only made it worse. Now he was pulling her down with just that one arm. Her knees gave out and she landed on the floor. The small shoes were crushing her toes as she struggled to find a position where she could get more air. Was this how she would die? It only made sense after her miserable life.

"That's it, fight it…" He murmured while untying his waistband. Then he let go and grabbed her hair at the back of her head instead. The tight grip burned her scalp, close to pulling the hair off.

For one second Ann gasped for air and then she did the only thing she could think of. She kicked the door with her heel and screamed at the top of her lungs.

He pulled her head back causing pain in her neck.

"What are you doing?" The cold voice above her asked.

She trembled with fear and could only look at the rug under her feet. The low point.

Someone yanked the door open and the light stung in her eyes where tears had started to form. As her hair was released she looked up to see Judith towering over her in a straight black dress that covered every inch of her skin from neck down. Under the broadening sleeves Ann caught a glimpse of white gloves as Judith crossed her hands.

"And what seems to be the problem here?"

"He refuses to pay." Ann replied from the floor with her voice still shaking. The client huffed loudly.

"What is this crap? I would have rewarded her generously afterwards but she can't handle a little game."

"I see." Judith considered in a hollow voice as Ann staggered to her feet. This was going to be her last day, she just knew it. A steep step into reality? She couldn't finish the thought when Judith pushed her against the wall and then cornered the man.

"Let me tell you something. _You_ don't make the rules around here. I do. Is that clear?"

Judith advanced so that the client backed away and ended up being chased by her further into the room.

"You don't get to insult my girls before you pay them. Who the hell do you think you are, marching in here in that hideous tracksuit and acting like you own the place? All of this is built by me and I can afford to choose." She snapped him on the shoulder but he was too stunned to react. The tone of her voice only got more frightening, almost as if it could inflict pain on those around but at the same time it had agony of its own.

"Now you pay that girl a hundred bucks for this little act and another hundred for me because I am just the kind of a witch you call me when you speak to your father. Or do you want me to phone your wife? Keep her up to date on your morning exercise?"

"No ma'am." He pulled out his wallet while Judith rested her eyes on his waist. Ann was still hugging herself by the wall when he threw the money on the bed and rushed out.

Judith marched behind him until she reached the distraught girl and looked at her with pity. It was the closest thing to a genuine emotion Ann had received from her so far and it didn't fade even when she pulled her hem down and then slid her hands to her waist where she stopped, not a moment too soon. Every little pull from those fingers made Ann's skin crawl. Then Judith stroked her cheek which was even worse because there was something oddly motherly about it.

"Have no illusions when you put yourself in this position, but have no fear either as long as I'm here."

"Got it." Ann said, blocking any kind of emotion that tried to break through. Her tears had dried now.

"I'll go escort him out while you just make yourself decent, dear. It's lunch hour soon."

* * *

"What did you need mama's signature for?" Judith asked Harris when she returned to her office downstairs. He didn't say anything but his jaw tightened as he handed the papers. After a careful look for show she started signing them.

"You come around often these days." She marked, wetting her finger as she moved on to the next document and Harris rolled his eyes when she couldn't see. His thoughts were on a topic they would not speak about, even if it was the very reason their meeting had been delayed by a few minutes.

"There's a simple solution to that. Give me more power and I won't have to visit you here ever again."

"I wouldn't want that."

"Oh I think you do."

She raised her head at his words.

"Don't make me angry, Harris. You know how inconvenient that is for both of us."

"You make a lot of rules, mother. Sometimes it's hard to keep track." He grinned at her as he walked out with the signed papers, a few of many to come.


	5. The Madam Gets in First

The pink fluff on the handcuffs matched the shade of Ann's nail polish perfectly as she slipped her fingers through it. It was soft and warm but the chain was ice cold, actual metal. She snapped them open and closed again, trying to get used to the sound. It still screeched in her ears but not because of what she was about to do. When she was ten years old, her father had been falsely accused of stealing from the wife of a local gas company's CEO at whose house he had been fixing the plumbing. When he was cuffed at their own front door, she had screamed objections until her mother had forced her into her room. She never learned the full story but as she grew older she had begun to wonder why the couple had not hired an actual plumbing company to do the work with all the money they had. She closed the cuffs again but it made her just an uneasy as a whole variety of sounds she was sensitive to.

The clock ticked on and she was painfully aware of every minute that had gone to waste but the three attempts she had made for the door had proven unsuccessful. She couldn't face them now since there was no way to tell from their appearance what kind of a creep lied underneath. She dropped her hands on her knees, still clutching the cuffs, and felt her stomach drop. In ten minutes she would have to be at the meeting area to greet her first scheduled appointment that Judith had insisted on giving her. It was against the brothel's policy to book appointments for a girl the customer had never been with but Judith was convinced Ann was the right one, and if all went well, it would be big money. Seeing as she had failed to make any in the past two hours, she knew refusing was not an option now. The handcuffs would come in handy, she had been told, as would the tethered clothing she had picked up from the hallway closet early that morning and was now wearing. It consisted of the shortest miniskirt she had ever seen, made of black leather and held together by one loose button, making it easy to reveal too much should she make one careless move. The expensive looking green silk top flowed around her hips. Apparently it would be worth to destroy this one piece, at least so the madam had said.

Ann let go of the cuffs and reached down to zip the long black boots on. They were a little too wide for her legs but it was too late to reconsider. If she kept the client waiting, it would reflect poorly on her service skills and the men were meant to help feel like kings. She rose from the bed and checked the skirt from every angle before adjusting it slightly. Would the client like her this way, find her pretty? The boots did not fit at all. She tried to press them into shape as she thought about what Judith might have promised the man. Maybe she had told him the girl would be inexperienced. That would be the worst. She fixed her hair over her shoulders, some to her back and some to the front, and then smiled at the mirror. It looked fake and so she tried again but forcing it only made it look more unnatural. Maybe it would come when she saw the man. Ann took a deep breath and tried to relax her face before she finally made it to the door.

* * *

"Very nice." The Japanese businessman grinned as he took Emerald in with his eager eyes. Ann tried not to be bothered by the fact that he was almost about one foot shorter. Could she be sure he was legal? She glanced at Judith who appeared to be glowing with pride but when their eyes met, her expression changed.

"Have I ever not kept my promise?" Judith replied kindly to the man, giving him a completely different look than she had shown Ann.

He laughed and Ann felt it was her turn to say something.

"I will make sure your visit is very satisfying…" Her voice faded as she felt Judith's eyes on her again.

_Why is she still here?_

Ann smiled through gritted teeth. It was impossible to bring Emerald on when Judith bored holes into her with her deep stare that could be either contempt or admiration. For her, it probably was the previous at all times and it would not cease.

"Emerald, are you fully prepared?"

"I'm sorry?" Slipped out of her mouth. The nerves were beginning to take over now that she had to think about what she was going to do with this man.

"There's a certain level of service you'll have to meet and knowing you haven't had experience with your new toys, I feel the client is entitled to some sort of a guarantee. He's on a tight schedule after all."

"I…" Ann's smile couldn't have got tighter if she had tried. "I will do my very best."

Judith slipped her hand in Ann's hair and ran it down her back. The nails left a few unnecessary scratches but Ann didn't flinch. Judith turned to the client, still holding Ann.

"So what do you think?"

He considered and fumbled his non-existent mustache.

"I would be more comfortable with her watching." He finally replied.

Ann had not felt that kind of cold fear since she had almost crashed with a van a few years ago while riding home from her waitressing job on a late night. Back then it had been over in a few seconds but this however would not. She felt drops of cold sweat form where Judith's fingernails pressed into her back. At least the boots felt tighter now.

"I don't think that's necessary." She said with not enough confidence compared to the amount of fear in her voice.

"She is a shy one…" Judith held her with force now and as Ann turned to her with one last pleading look, she received a quiet but threating response.

"Some like to be watched."

* * *

All the way to the room Ann kept hoping one of them would call the bluff. Someone had to, right? She showed the client in first and then followed with Judith right behind her. The woman moved like a ghost and somehow managed to keep up even though the dress didn't allow her much space to move her legs. Whatever was going to happen now, Ann knew she had to take charge before it was too late.

"I understand the price has been agreed upon?"

He was already one step ahead and handed her the money, while Judith watched in silence.

"Feel free to use the shower. It's over there." Ann directed the client as she always did, wishing her request would have come out warmer.

They waited until he had closed the door and then she turned to Judith.

"So how is this gonna work? Would you like to give him the physical yourself too or do you prefer to watch?"

"Oh Emmy…" Judith swept back the thick white curls from her temples. "I'm not enjoying this any more than you are."

Ann crossed her arms. "I actually believe you."

"Well you have good instincts so go with them. Don't…"

"My instincts…" Ann cut in. "…tell me you are lonely. You have been alone a long time and you just want someone to poke for fun because that is all you're capable of. Am I getting close?"

_Please let me be close._

Judith blinked first.

"You shouldn't psychoanalyze me, dear. There are things that would make your pretty little head roll…night after night…in tangled sweaty sheets, perhaps in the arms of a man foolish enough to fall for you. When you get into my head, you will never get out."

Ann didn't need a reminder of how creepy her boss was. How did her every word sting so hard?

"I'll try to keep my distance then. Will you let me do my job in peace?"

Judith lowered her gaze. "Maybe this one time. I don't need your sugar sweet screams in my head before lunch."

* * *

"Are you comfortable?"

He was sweet. She had to give him that. Even when her hands were chained to the bedpost, she didn't have any reservations about the guy. He slid his hands down the silky fabric on her sides and watched her carefully, almost lovingly. It ignited something in her and made her wish it would go on for longer. But it didn't.

"We're all set then." He said after her nod and moved his hands to her hips where he took a firm hold of the top. Piece by piece he tore it apart and Ann fell deeper into the character with each objection she shouted. Acting was not something she was used to but she was surprised to find it wasn't that hard when he guided her. The one button on the skirt popped off easily when he ripped it with a hungry look in his eyes, and then Emerald surrendered to pleasure in her sweet captivity. Ann watched the scene somewhere further away, as a shadow that couldn't feel what was happening nor have any sense of the time that passed.

* * *

Judith's office was locked and so Ann went to the receptionist to handle the business side of the day. It was a small room right next to the madam's and far enough from the lounge to take the clients' calls in private. The girl had dark brown curls that hung over her face as she appeared to be fixing something in the large book Ann recognized as the same that Judith had.

"Excuse me. Could you…?" Ann held out the stack of bills and the girl finally acknowledged her presence.

"What's your name?" She asked as she took the money. Her skin was the color of milk chocolate and the big brown eyes and full lips made her look like she was in her teens, but she certainly was not.

"Emerald."

"I see." Her head drooped again as she sighed. The paper rustled between her tightly clutched fingers. She rose to her feet and Ann saw the big eyes were now narrow slits.

"Is there a problem?" Ann asked. She had thought there was a limit to the number of obstacles she could face during one shift.

The girl watched her in deep contempt and then out of the blue slapped her across the face so hard Ann had to hold on to the desk for support. It too rocked on the hardwood floor.

"Do you have any idea how much money you cost me with the stunt you pulled?" She yelled. "Judith checked the books and not only did she ban my regular, she's also cutting my pay. If I knew another safe place to work at I'd already be out of here."

"You're Carmen?" Ann asked, holding her cheek that still burned.

"Damn right I am and you better stay out of my way if you know what's good for you."

_How, if you're the receptionist too?_

"I'm sorry." Ann started as calm as possible. "I had no idea. I got scared and I panicked. And I know it's hard…"

"Do you have children?" Carmen cut in.

_Sort of. _Ann wanted to say.

"No."

"Then you don't know shit about _hard_." She scowled and started dividing the money into piles according to the bill value. The amount looked smaller to Ann when she looked at it that way. Her self-worth scattered across the table, almost meaningless.

_It's only temporary._

But what mattered more, the past, the present or what she was going to do, if all was to work out, in the future? Nothing was certain, except for the fact that if she was to die today, she would forever be a fallen woman.

"He paid me a hundred because Judith made him. You can have it, if you want to."

The words sounded every bit as demeaning in Ann's own ears as they must have sounded to the angry brunette. Somehow in this house kindness didn't come to her as naturally as it usually did. The girl didn't look happy and seemed to be trying her hardest not to say anything. She handed Ann her share and put the rest in the safe without taking one dollar herself. The tension was enough to convince Ann to leave without any further suggestions.

Now that she had washed off her make-up and was wearing her own dress again, she felt a sense of disconnect to the place. Foul things were happening around her, contagious and ready to pull her back in if she didn't leave immediately. The red curtains started fading in her eyes and turning into a shade of rust. It was all somewhat haunting.

She was in such a rush, she barely noticed the petite blonde blocking her way and stopped inches from her.

"Hi." Sherri said with an empty look and Ann suddenly felt more confined than she had with the cuffs on.

"Hi?"

"I'm sorry about the other day. I just couldn't risk losing him." Sherri looked down and fumbled her hands together. "We don't all become rich here, you know."

Ann could see what the girl meant and nodded, not looking at her. Her fear of not making it big enough had started to crawl up on her. What choice would be left then if she was to fail at this?

"Don't worry. I'll manage just fine."

"You won't tell Judith?"

_What?_

She then remembered how the other girls would line up before clients, not one trying to outshine the other or flirt in any way. Little Swallow was desperate enough to break the policies that Ann wasn't familiar with since Judith had kept their first meeting so curt. She longed for that day now.

"Just try not to do it again." She said with a forced smile and left with plans to sleep for the rest of the day.

* * *

The same dark jackets were in their usual order as were the almost identical Italian shoes at the bottom, nothing new, nothing suspicious. Judith's eyes returned to the top and she laid her hand at the shoulder pad of her favorite piece but it wasn't the same as feeling his muscles first tense and then, upon realizing she would not let go, slowly relax underneath it. She breathed in as much she could take. One day he would learn there was only one woman who would always be there. She snatched her hand away when she heard the key turn and closed the closet with no sound.

Harris froze for a second when he noticed the welcome in his hallway that came with the longing, guilt-inducing look. He collected himself quickly.

"Mother, you're visiting early."

"I was worried about you, Harris. I'm feeling a sense of animosity between us these days, a distraction. Is there…a distraction?"

He didn't blink once as he looked into her eyes. This could go on for less than a minute or for years. It was his choice to make.

"There isn't."

Judith sneered and turned away, making Harris follow her in order to hear the rest of what she had to say.

"Emerald got a taste of Mr. all-eyes-on-me today. The full package, if you know what I mean."

"Why are you telling me this?" He asked, wary with each word.

"Oh you know how I like to stay close to you. Check the deals before you make them…look closely…observe."

Harris drew his suddenly sluggish hands to his hips. If only just once the aftermath could have been as short as his temper was.

"I have never given any of your girls a second look because they are worthless to me, no exceptions. So don't take your anger out on one of them in a moment of weakness. You need her. I don't."

"I appreciate the concern but you do understand that I have to be sure that you don't get fooled. As much as I love you, I know deep down you are a man and when a man loses focus, kingdoms will fall. I won't let that happen to you."

Harris sighed. "Meaning?"

Judith cackled. "It means that I am moving in."


	6. The Private Party

Ann took in the view of the shiny windows that went on higher than she could stretch her neck. The building was intimidating in its fine appearance but at the same time she felt in control. She had been hand-picked and called here, the credit card payment had been made to Judith's "cleaning company" and now all that was left was for her to do the job which, after three weeks in the business, was something she felt confident about. Sure, she was nothing but a working girl but for a moment she could pretend she was more. The doorman seemed to think so as he put the phone down and let her in with a courteous smile.

She pressed the elevator button for one of the top floors, an actual penthouse, and on the way felt up the ruffles of her new green dress under the long jacket. Maybe the hem was too short? Did it matter? She was always worried about revealing her lack of fashion sense and unsure of how to dress for the occasion, but at the same time too afraid to ask Judith or any of the girls for help in case they happened to use that insecurity against her. Still, rich people were so perceptive. She hoped she wouldn't mess up.

The doors opened to bright light and she found herself faced with a grayish gentleman with a thin mustache. He was wearing a tailored black tweed suit and with a quick assessment she figured he was not comfortable enough with the situation for it to go smoothly, but she had three hours and it would be enough.

"Hi, I'm…" She started her usual friendly introduction that was exactly the same regardless of the client's appearance, but he cut her short right away.

"Save it for him." He put on his felt hat and slipped past her. She tried to follow but then her eyes caught a figure by the wall midway through the room, half hidden in the shadow, but the prominent jawline could hardly be mistaken, or the sleek dark jacket that had followed her from the start.

"H…" Ann started before Harris motioned her to remain quiet. Her head spun around but she could only see the doors close behind her. Then it was quiet. The apartment was spacious with pieces of light blue furniture scattered around as well as oil lamps and elephant figures on every open shelf and bureau. Everything about it screamed something other than the man before him. His hand lingered in the inner pocket as he took her in with a trained eye.

"Are you insane?" She finally asked when he took the first step towards her. In his hand there was now a long black box. He put it right under her eyes and snapped it open. The light immediately caught the diamonds and the emeralds that made for what was likely the most expensive bracelet she had ever seen. She lifted her transfixed gaze from the piece. Somehow it terrified her as did all things that didn't exist in her world. They brought danger and uncertainty. His eyes sparkled too, but she wasn't sure if she was just seeing stars.

"Got you a little something."

"Sounds like a dangerous mistake."

He set the box down. "You've just walked into a strange man's apartment, with intent to let them treat you as their property. How does that rank on your scale?"

The phone next to them rang before she could explain to him again how her choices were her own and the risks recognized every day. How hard was it for him to let it sink down? Maybe he should have done one of the late night shifts himself to get the idea. She picked up Carmen's unenthusiastic check-up call and told her everything was fine, pressing it so that Harris would get the idea. The receptionist sounded disappointed by this piece of news when she ended the call.

"Not all of us have the luxury to make different choices. I have risked everything and I will not let you ruin it so, if you don't keep your distance then I will have to go with the old-fashioned way and tell your mother."

Harris reached for her hand but she pulled it away. "Don't touch me."

He swiped his hand over his shaved head in a sudden distraught manner. Then he looked her firmly in the eye.

"Whatever you say to my mother about me, I guarantee will only hurt one of us, and it won't be me. You have a lot to learn, Emerald eyes."

She found herself staring at his lips, how softly they let the threating words fly out. It made her take a step back.

"What do you want from me?"

"Patience."

She considered this while he rolled the jacket off his shoulders and walked past her as he put it on a coat hanger. There was that whiff of a freshly showered man in the air, hot and humid, just like at the start of every session at the house. She started to panic again.

"Let me."

His hands were on both sides of her arms, waiting for her only inches above them. She opened each button robotically and then let the coat slide down her back where he caught it. The tips of his fingers brushed over her arms for a while and she felt a chill having lost the cover. There was a pause and when she turned around, she found him somewhat occupied. He then promptly hung the coat while she glimpsed herself in the narrow mirror next to her. Something was wrong with this picture. What was he after?

"Let's sit down and talk." He answered her silent question, grabbing the box and motioning her to go ahead. She glanced at him before walking to the main area and taking a seat in one of the armchairs so that he wouldn't be able to sit too close to her. It was too wide and low for her to find a comfortable position and she settled on sitting at the edge, trying to look natural. On the coffee table there was a bottle of champagne in an ice bucket and glasses next to it.

Harris set the box down on the table and then took out the bottle.

"Let's get you a drink."

"Not on the job." She replied, biting her lip.

He smirked. "If you are still thinking about my mother then you will need this."

He popped the cork open and poured two glasses with elegance and skill, almost to the brim. The golden liquid sparked and with his words she was too tempted to listen to reason. In her life she had always seen alcohol as the cause of all evil but this was different. It was a gateway to something beyond her ordinary days.

"Thank you, Harris." She took the glass that was offered and stared into it. A sense of fantasy surrounded her and she tried to push the high hopes away but at the same time she wanted to toy with the idea. These chances were too rare.

"To the unattainable." Harris raised his glass and she followed, unable to resist a smile. It looked to her that he swallowed before he even took the first sip.

All she knew was how to lead the man to bed from this situation, but how to reverse it? The champagne tingled its way down her throat but instead of calming her, it seemed to have the opposite effect in her heart. He had opened the box again, apparently insistent on putting the bracelet on her and she had given up fighting the idea.

"Changed your mind?" He asked as she held out her hand.

"Well you paid for it." She didn't know what she was referring to with her reply but neither of them was amused. He hid his expression from her when he set the cold diamonds on her wrist. Her fingers twitched.

"Do you like it?" He asked when he was done, but his eyes revealed he wasn't talking about the bracelet. Men with such gifts didn't have to ask.

"Do you like your job?" She threw the question back at him and he retreated in his seat a little.

"It keeps the world turning. Whether I _like it_, is meaningless to every soul on this planet. But yours isn't a job, it's a way of life."

"Feels like a job to me."

Harris leaned forward and set his hand on the armrests connecting the two chairs.

"You can feign this Emerald act because you have all it takes for it, but you can't lie. And one day lies are all you have left."

She didn't need to be reminded of what she already felt every day. The lies bubbled under her skin even when she wasn't talking to anyone and in every mirror she saw a reflection of them these days.

"You sound older than your years." She noted.

"I am older than most people."

"It's funny…" Ann gulped down the rest of her champagne, feeling liberated despite the dark tone of the conversation. "I've always felt younger than most people, the child mixed in adult games."

The emeralds shone on her hand. Where would she ever wear it? Not at home, definitely not at work, and none of her colleagues from her previous jobs ever wanted to remain even as acquaintances once she had left so there were no other choices. There was nothing in her life but home and the job.

"What's your name?" His question interrupted her train of thought in an unpleasant way.

_Too close._

Her easy smile became forced. "She's not here. It's Emerald you called and you should remember that."

"Didn't you notice?"

"Notice what?"

His eyes looked above hers, half present and partly somewhere further in time where they weren't supposed to be.

"Emerald walked out the moment you saw me."

He made use of her baffled silence and rose up. Then he took her hand and made her follow. It was strange how sweaty his hand was despite his calm appearance. Maybe he was just hot-blooded? She tried to lean back when his hands landed on her hips but they then found themselves on her back, and wherever they touched, heat followed.

"I won't sleep with you", came out of her mouth. For some reason there was a lump in her throat, and it only grew when she found his eyes deeply focused on her.

"Tell me your name."

She froze and the bracelet slipped down. It felt even colder against her hand that was now connected with his. He brushed it with his thumb.

"Ann," she uttered as if a switch had been flicked on.

It took a few moments but then a smile appeared on his face, and everything seemed to make sense to him. There was a new light in his eyes.

"Annie..."

He took her face in his hands and her eyes danced wildly, scared to go further but not ready to stop either. His were relentless.

"I can't let them ruin you."

_Ruin me? I am nothing. I barely exist._

She shook her head as much as his grip allowed.

"You're chasing a dream and I advise you to stop."

He traced her cheekbones, as if painting a mental picture.

"I'm asking you to stop. Be with me and I'll give you everything you never even knew you wanted."

It was a promise she had read about in those romance novels that had lied around the house since she was little. They came so easy, but in them the heroine rarely had to juggle prostitution and the jealous madam's son on top of all the common struggles. Her own mother had refused to get out of bed that day, even when Ann threatened not to come home that night if she didn't. It had no effect.

"You don't even know me."

"I know what I want, and I have never been wrong."

Her heart sank. Was this some cruel joke played upon her by him and Judith since she had dared to challenge them both? He was a man of wealth and surely he had enough pride not to get mixed up with a woman of her occupation. She wanted assurance but all she got was one implausible answer after another and the idea of being humiliated after everything she had gone through at the brothel was too much to bear.

"I should go." She pulled away and his hand slipped through her curls. It brushed her back on the way and she felt it all the way down in her spine.

"Annie."

She turned around in shock.

"No! Don't ever say that again."

It was all out in the open. If Judith heard him call her that then she might as well move to a different state. How would she ever fix this? Harris followed her to the elevator door and remained even when she tried to mentally shake him off.

"Don't let my mother get inside your head. She'll build you up and then take you down when she feels like it. Hell, it might be tomorrow. Promise me…"

She grabbed her coat and pressed the elevator button ten times just to be sure.

"…you will think about my offer. They don't come by often."

The elevator pinged and she shot him one last panic-filled glare. This wasn't real. She should have stuck to waitressing after all.

* * *

Harris stared at the metal door, still picturing the green eyes under the golden locks and the innocence in them that had been broken long before. She had that same subtle but slightly floral scent that all Judith's girls wore but he could still smell the difference underneath. They were winter but she was spring in bloom. Not much damage was done yet, or then she hid it well. He could picture Judith's mental torture on the poor girl but that was the only image he allowed in his head about Emerald's doings at the place.

He collected his things and went home to wait for the phone call from the man he had sent to follow Ann home. It would open up new ways to play the game, unless it was too late. The amount of time he had already spent on her had him embarrassed which made it all the more important to seal the deal as soon as possible. He would not be mocked this way for much longer.

* * *

Ann was crouched on the backseat of the cab as she tried to remove the chain from her wrist. Either the lock was ridiculously complicated or then it was her hand shaking. She ended up punching the thing which made her feel better. Then she managed to open it and hide it in her purse. It would have to be returned, of course, and it would not be accepted, obviously. If what Harris had said about Judith only hurting her was true then she had big problems in her hands and only a few thousand dollars saved up. She threw her head against the back rest and watched as the downtown Dallas city lights flashed by. What a twisted idea from Judith to send her here out into the world to see what it had to offer, only to pull her back into the whorehouse for the usual 5 pm shift.

She would work harder now and make herself irreplaceable, and spend as little time anywhere Harris might find her.


	7. How Do I Get Back Up?

The drawings were beautiful in a way life was in that first ray of sunshine in the morning when everything else was still asleep but the eyes that witnessed it. The lines were flowing, misty, like dreams that were just a little too far out of reach. They were multiple strokes at first but as she flipped the papers, too many of them for that one day but they kept appearing out of nowhere, the lines were made of longer single strokes, harder and thicker. Ann watched her mother's mind unravel with all its beauty in a horrifying way but she couldn't stop her hands from digging further into what would only make her already dim morning longer. Why couldn't she have put these images into words? Everything was easier in words.

Ann stuffed everything back into the drawer when she heard the shower go off, and tip toed back into her room where neatly placed horse pictures greeted her on the light wooden walls. They were also drawn by the artist in the family but that had been a long time ago, back when footsteps didn't sound so heavy on the hard floors, when talk was frequent, laughter even more so and the cigarette smoke just wasn't so thick. The papers had turned yellow but the images were as clear to her as they ever were.

The fear was stronger than tears this morning and so her body settled on a dose of stinging pain. Her hand trembled on her stomach when she thought of the moment the pretty dress would have to come off and be replaced by one of the numerous green items she had bought when the money had started to come in. Was this what a mistake felt like? The early eagerness was gone and replaced by a growing disgust she felt the rare moments Grace smiled at her or when she did any everyday chore that reminded her of how out of place she was in this world now. Ann had assumed she would get used to this but as time went by the contrast between her two lives appeared starker. If it continued like this, it would become unbearable, but the thought of going back to waitressing and relying on the small tips was even more unbearable. They would never get anywhere, only closer to the grave. It wasn't supposed to end this way because what would be the point then? All that hard work her family had put in, only to quietly disappear one by one.

She quickly passed her mother in the hallway, knowing no look she would receive now would make her feel any better. Her eyes were fixed on the one mission she had but her mind was fighting it, distracting her with words and feelings, the touch of his hand on her cheek. She closed her eyes and took a deep breath. What did he know? He was playing the way the wealthy do but she could never in her life afford the things he could, and that included the immaterial ones too. If she avoided him then maybe she would forget this troubling feeling she wanted more of, just to know what it would be like. She didn't recognize herself like this and yet she had never felt more comfortable in her skin.

The air was hot and heavy and made her regret her decision to let her hair down but she didn't want to turn back and see Grace settle on that armchair from where she would not move until Rodney, or God knows an even more useless man asked her to. A cab would have been smarter but she had decided to save as much as she could in the smallest time it took, and so she grabbed the handles that had warmed up despite the shade she kept the bike in. Ann knew she would need a shower by the time she had reached her destination.

She pushed the pedals as the rush hour traffic blew more hot air into her face and the fumes tickled her throat. It had never been the most convenient biking route but today it seemed as if someone was signaling her to stop and turn around, say goodbye to this double life when she still could. How would she know when stopping was no longer an option? She wished she had a friend at the brothel to ask these things but she had come to realize that money mattered more than friendships and the other girls had started to make snarky comments about her and Judith. If only they knew how little love there was between her and the madam they might have had a good laugh.

Ann had never been this tired at this point before and the heat pulled her down. As she tried to push herself, her foot slipped and due to her slow reaction, the bike fell off the path and rolled down the small slope. She crashed down between the huge tree roots with her leg trapped under it. It scratched her knee visibly and it was not long until she could see the blood drip from the skin deep wound, a much uglier sight than it felt but she had always had a high tolerance for physical pain. The dry grass scraped her from beneath while the sun blinded her vision. She stared into it longer than she should have until she could see stars and spots, whiteness that calmed her down. Every root and rock made its way under her hands as she slowly pushed herself in an upright position. Then she noticed the damage that had been done to the bike, the twisted handle and broken front wheel were clear signs that her road had come to an end. She got up on her feet and desperately pulled her ride up but it only looked worse from that perspective.

"No…" She gasped, not caring about the thin lines of blood running down her leg. Her cheeks were burning red and the dress was quickly getting drenched in sweat without the soft breeze that usually aided her ride. A shadow passed briefly on her side and she glanced up to the road. There was a vehicle parked, a sleek sports car that she didn't recognize but she could not be mistaken by the male figure making his way down to her.

"Let me help you out of this ditch," Harris proposed but didn't emphasize his offer in any way. His expression was somehow softer in natural light and Ann found herself getting lost in it while her mouth let her suspicions be heard in a nonchalant manner.

"No thanks."

"Would Emerald say yes? She has a job to get to if I remember correctly."

Ann watched him, annoyed at first but soon a flow of emotions ran through her. They always ended at sad, if she waited long enough.

"She does. But she might also worry about certain things entwining. How did you find me, Harris?"

He looked at his surroundings in casual manner, not seeing the forest from the trees, Ann thought.

"How did you find me?" He asked, twirling a leaf between his fingers. His grasp on that fragile natural element was rough, yet he somehow let it unharmed.

"I thought you were a c…" She paused. "My God, you are just as bad as they are. Do you think I sought you out? I don't discriminate, I just take what is on offer and I apologize for making that mistake in the first place. You are obviously a man who doesn't need to pay for these kind of services…"

"I think you are starting to answer my question."

"I think you are missing my point." She replied, now aware that she had missed a point some time ago. "You have a certain charm but it would work on anyone. And don't let that go to your head," she pointed out when she spotted a vague smirk. "It's part of my job to recognize the qualities in men and use them for my advantage."

"I don't doubt it for one second," he said as he crouched down and pulled out a napkin from his inner pocket. A rush of hotness that had nothing to do with the sun filled her when she felt the strokes on her leg as he gently cleaned her up. Hoping he wouldn't notice, she took hold of the tree for support.

"I knew Emerald had a wild side." He glanced up when he was finishing. "But I think Annie's is still coming out."

He laid his fingers over her knee and then kissed it from the back. It felt as hot as the air around them but the touch was softer than she had experienced from a man before. It was tender and yet secure, and she knew it could have been anything she wanted. She leaned closer against the tree, fighting an urge to do something about this dangerous situation that she knew was now in her hands. For a moment she thought his lips might trail upwards and her heart stopped. Various clients had tried to show her affection before but it had never shaken her this way, so indescribably.

Up on the road cars were still passing them by, their motors roaring which she only realized when his touch left her. The little energy she had left disappeared when he got on his feet and took no longer than a second to pose the question with his eyes. She didn't know what her "yes" looked like because it was one she could not repeat in front of a mirror, it appeared by itself without hesitation and ignited something between them that made her ignore all the reasons why she shouldn't go there.

He kissed her with thought, a single collision that made her heart skip a beat and then slowly pick up its pace until she thought she could not stand to remain there longer. Neither one moved but she needed to breathe harder and so she opened her mouth a little, only to find him tracing her with his. It seemed he was making her think of what that contact meant rather than trying to get as deep as he could. It was the most intimate kiss she had received and she knew this was not something she could break away from, not even when their lips finally broke apart and the questions in his eyes grew bigger, more meaningful.

The sun had got the best of him as well but it seemed to give him no discomfort. He slipped a finger between her curls, like a hook, and started twirling one around it.

"I like you bare. Emerald has all these…items in her hair. Seems unnecessary."

Ann wondered if the color on her face was now starting to resemble one of a fresh strawberry and she was grateful for the tree again, for shade this time.

"Men tend to prefer variety, or so I'm told."

He let the curl fall and watched it droop as if framed her face.

"That's not the kind of a man you need. I'd never ask you to change a thing."

She laughed. In the light of day this prospect of a handsome, wealthy man courting her was so hard to believe, it had become funny. She was shocked to see how quickly her reaction killed the little flicker in his eyes.

"I don't like being laughed at," he said but the tone of his voice didn't reveal if it was a threat or a plea. However, it made her stop that instant. She shook her head.

"I'm sorry. It's just me, and you, and…" She looked up at the road and didn't finish.

"It's just you and me," he concluded and took her hand. As soon as she had turned her head back to him, he took her chin and kissed her with force. It was nothing like the one before and everything she had never known she wanted. Suddenly it felt worth risking everything and she was tempted to use her professional tricks just to make sure. She teased him with her tongue and simultaneously slipped two fingers under his belt, near where it counted. At that he quickly bended backwards from his waist down, yet his lips didn't waver. She didn't let him off so easily and bluntly followed, pushing her hips against his and grinned. It was like a new high and she couldn't stop herself even though she knew it would bring her trouble.

Their breaths mingled as his lips parted, an alarming moment of quietness.

"Don't play with me, Emerald."

"It's Annie," she corrected, still grinning but feeling as if something very small inside her had died. Some of it must have caught his eyes as a hint of sadness spread in them.

"Take me to work?"

He nodded at her rather demanding request and turned around abruptly. Her skin felt cold, and somewhere deep down odd sense of regret and guilt combined tugged at her heart. Why did she feel that coldness was about to become part of her?

Harris lifted the bike easily.

"I'll have a friend fix this up for tomorrow, so tonight, don't leave until I come get you."

She nodded in turn and watched as he carried such a crucial part of her life in his hands. She trusted him with it, and yet she didn't.


	8. You Could Keep Me Up In Bed

Ann felt her eyelids droop the first time when she strapped the black high heels on, so perfectly fitted now but she knew at the end of the night her toes would be begging for mercy. There would be no more boots because they reminded her of the things she enjoyed and as soon as Emerald's graceful touch landed on the earthy things, they were ruined for Ann. She had started to hate pretty things, the lacy details, flowery accessories and most of all she hated that green dress that Judith didn't let her get rid of. Uncertain if the madam was still in her office finishing another page in that book that only seemed to grow in size every time Ann stepped in there, or maybe it was just her feeling smaller, she slipped the skimpy outfit on and tried to avoid every mirror in the room. The last one caught her off guard as her mind had started to slip and what she saw was a very vivid reflection of a tired, almost lifeless version of her mother. She tried to force her eyes open, a troubling sign at 5 pm but nothing unexpected after taking her quick fix the night before. She didn't give it a second thought and walked right back to the closet to get her purse and the bottle of Ritalin. It would be better to take it at the beginning of the shift instead of towards the end so that there would be some hope getting sleep afterwards.

* * *

The house changed its shape when the night closed in, the hallways grew bigger as lights shimmered and made you believe it was a dark velvet cave you stepped in now, dangerous and yet even more appealing. No bad deed was judged here, sins were nothing but small slips and the only thing that mattered was the pleasure the human mind yearned in order to live, as it was meant to. Harris hardly ever saw this side because no man was allowed to wander the upstairs hallways alone and anyway, it had ceased to fascinate him after he had discovered the joys of power, hidden bank accounts and upscale hotel suites. He had never paid for the act itself, never chased a woman but instead always waited for them to come to him. Every move he made in his own time was to distance himself from his mother, even if none of it would have been possible without her money, but that was a fact he didn't want to inconvenience himself with.

He could see her return now, the alert stare appeared in the midst of the tangled blond curls and only made him smile internally as the rest of her appearance reminded him of the unpleasant side of their situation.

"I don't usually have a line at my door." She flashed her long lashes, still clearly in her work mode.

"I don't usually line up."

She got impatient quickly and stomped her foot.

"What in God's name are you doing here? Don't you know your mother gets scarier as midnight passes?"

Why was she always bringing her up? Harris tried to shake off the thought of Judith possibly still awake and waiting for him to return home, calm, so very calm. Her words would dwindle as she got more furious and he could never be sure what she might take from him as punishment. There was no one more educated in things that mattered to Harris than her and he would have given anything for her to have a convenient amnesia. The green eyed distraction before him too was getting close in all the wrong ways.

"Then we should get away from where anyone could see us, don't you think?" Harris gestured at the door.

Ann turned the handle, keeping her eyes on him. There was a butterfly shaped ornament dangling sadly from her hair and he removed in gently.

"I think Emerald killed it", he noted.

"Hysterical, Harris."

He noticed her eyes were wide open despite the tiredness in her voice. It had been the perfect moment to arrive after all. He hid the butterfly in his pocket.

"I brought you lunch." He pulled up a brown paper bag and the green eyes grew even wider.

"Sorry if I'm not following but are we on a date in my chamber of secrets? I mean, we are both certainly dressed for the occasion," she nodded her head at his black business suit. "But still, it's an odd choice."

Her voice got quieter towards the end as she expected Harris to respond in some way but his face was its usual blank canvas that made her nervous. He turned away from her and took in the room while being slightly suffocated by the lack of air. The place had always had bad ventilation but in the rooms it was even worse, and possibly intentional. Harris tried to breathe as little as possible and when he noticed the creases on the bed cover, he swallowed but his throat still felt dry. This was a mistake, but he would have done it anyway.

He found a table to place the bag on and accidentally inhaled the dirty air for too long. It made him feel sick now.

"What's you got there?" She asked from behind him, and his shoulders relaxed even though it didn't help his stomach. When she walked to his side, their eyes met and the curious innocence on her face made him smile. It happened so naturally, he didn't realize right away that he couldn't remember the last time he had managed that. For as long as he knew, his smile had only been there to conceal, provoke and mock. This was something else.

"Just hot dogs."

"So nothing about you is what it seems." She laughed and Harris sensed relief in her voice as he handed the paper wrapped food to her. He wished there had been another place to sit besides the bed but furniture was deemed unnecessary there, unless it was for Judith to sit on. To his luck, Ann made her way to the bed first and he followed, sitting down at a safe distance. Her legs were left uncovered by the short dress that had been framed and nailed into his long-term memory. The hem still lifted a little as she sat.

"Are you doing well?" He asked just as Ann had sunk her teeth in her meal. His question evoked a deer-in-headlights look on her. She looked hungry too, uncared for.

"Yes…" She stared past him after swallowing. "Yes, I…"

He watched her carefully and waited.

"I mean…when this is all over…"

"Just eat", he pushed her softly when the words got stuck, and she obliged. The frightened expression remained but he couldn't tell what it was directed at.

"It's not about you, is it?" He asked after a while.

Her head sank. He had hit the target.

"Things are just hard right now, without my dad, but when I finish this, then we can go back. Well not back really…just far enough so we can begin again."

"What happened with your father?"

"He worked so hard…" Ann's eyes were distant again but Harris knew it was where all that was important lay.

"He had a stroke last fall and then my mother got worse, in more than one way."

"He died?" He asked to break the silence. For some reason he had not expected this and when she nodded, it made him uncomfortable.

"I'm sorry A…" He didn't know if there was a name he was allowed to call her. Still, it was an opportunity not to be missed even though he would have rather not gone there. He straightened his jacket.

"Then you and I have something in common. My father died a long time ago and, well you've met my mother. She could be better."

She looked saddened at first, a deeper reaction than he was usually met with, or maybe it was her eyes that he couldn't look away from.

"I'm sorry. It must have affected you and your mother a great deal while you were growing up."

She looked at him apologetically and took a bite of her food. He was glad he didn't have to ask her to this time. Maybe she expected him to continue but he had already given away too much.

"Does your mother know what you're doing?" He asked.

"What do you think?"

She had now finished eating and the tension was getting stronger with nothing to keep her hands busy.

"You are too special, Annie." He saw the fury slowly ignite in her eyes at the use of her name and it amused him a little. One of these days he wanted to see her mad.

"You don't look like them, talk like them, and I don't mean just these girls, I mean the world I've seen. You are unlike anyone I've ever met and your mother knows that too. It would kill her if she found out."

"Then she won't", she said stiffly.

"She'll never recover."

"She _won't_ find out. What are you trying to say, Harris?"

"That you may be doing all the wrong sacrifices for the people who love you. You're too special to be ruined by common trash."

He caught a strand of her hair since she never seemed to object to that and his fingers ran down until the curl slipped away. Then he brushed the blond waves off her shoulder to the very last one and got closer. That fresh scent he recognized was still there when his lips caressed her neck.

"Leave it all to me." He whispered as he felt her body tremble. Their surroundings were fast slipping from his mind and so was the heavy feeling in his stomach. It was being replaced by a need that made him forget all about his carefully thought out plans. If only he could have gone through with it, it might have helped him see clearly again. Her warm hand had landed on his and silently told him that she understood everything. That was all, it would not go further, no matter how many times she gasped under his kisses. He responded in the only way that allowed him to get close and wrapped his arms around her so tightly that she couldn't move.

"Come home with me", he demanded before he kissed her on the mouth. For a while he felt her give in, but she broke it at the first opportunity.

"It's not that simple. I have a life…"

"What do you have?" He insisted, a little more aggressively than he had intended and so he lowered his voice. "I'll help your mother and you both. What do you have to lose?"

"My reputation for a start. Do you have any idea of the things your mother knows about me, what she could do to me?"

"You forget it goes both ways. Except, you could do much worse to her with what you know."

Ann considered this while Harris traced her wrist where the bracelet had never reappeared.

"Have you ever had anyone take care of you?"

"Not in the way you mean, I suppose."

A knock on the door interrupted them. It was firm, three consecutive knocks paced far apart. Ann felt the life drain out of her.

"Why is she here at this hour? Harris, hide", she hissed as she quickly hid the take away trash under the sheet.

Harris looked around him lazily, the way one would when doom was evident. Then he reluctantly climbed down and crawled under the bed while Ann kicked him on the legs with her heels to rush him. The door opened just as she bounced off the bed.

There was something new about Judith and as far as Ann could tell, it was nothing good. Her eyes fell on the black cover that she now realized was actually a bathrobe and the shiny shoes were clearly made for a man. Even her hair was not in its usual controlled chaos but instead just plain chaos.

Ann took two slow steps as close to the bed as she could, and tested the waters.

"Has something happened?"

The vague stare in Judith's eyes left that instant and was replaced by a look to kill.

"Carmen says you came here alone."

"That is true." Ann replied and hoped her words were louder than her heartbeat.

"What's that?" Judith pointed at the brown bag that was still on the table with the food Harris had not touched himself.

"I brought lunch."

"From where?"

"Joe's." Ann made up. This was starting to be awfully like one of her old oral exams at school.

"And where is this _Joe's_ that you went to in the middle of your shift?"

"I didn't. A client brought it for me", she decided to correct and acted a little sleepy as she said the words.

Judith's face twitched into a tiny smile.

"So…I hope you haven't overworked yourself since tomorrow is the big day."

_Please don't say it. Please…_

"That private party will bring us both a nice check if you can handle it. Do you think you're ready?"

Ann swore she could hear Harris's breath under the bed and suddenly a rush of different emotions started to shake her, fear, guilt, disgust…she also wanted to cry but for what reason?

"Never been more prepared." She blurted out.

"Good. I'd hate to see all your hard work go to waste. Us women have to make the most of our assets if we wish to be independent. You've come so far, Emerald darling."

She kissed Ann on the cheek, wiping away any trace of Harris. If was like a cloud of poisonous smoke had swept over her, sealing her fate. Ann watched her make a graceful exit in the oversized shoes and then stood still because she had no idea what would happen now. All she knew was that she wanted it over soon so that she wouldn't have to live with this feeling any longer. Where was her safe place? For a moment something pleasant had happened in the house and the aftermath hit harder than she had feared. She turned on her heels to face the expressionless Harris again. Where did he put it all away? There was nothing left of the warmth she had seen and felt only minutes ago.

"You're going?"

Ann nodded. "I just need time to think."

"I can give you time to think." His words were a low roar that still slowly lost their fearsomeness for her when she looked in his eyes. " Those parties are nothing but an open buffet. Or were you told you're in for something upscale? They have money and if there's one thing I know about my mother is that she'll never say no to a big deal no matter what it costs to the employee. You're not cut out for that."

"You don't know the kind of people I've dealt with. Believe me, Harris, I'm stronger than you think."

"No, you're not."

"I'll just have to find out for myself, don't I?"

"Be my guest." Harris lay down on the bed and Ann glared at him.

"You have to leave. I still have four hours left."

He seemed to have lost the tension when he looked at her again.

"And I promised to take you home but my mother might still be downstairs so here we are. I guess we don't have a choice but to spend the night together, but don't you worry Annie, I'll pay Emerald well."

Ann put her hands on her waist. "You're unbelievable."

"Unbelievably right as you will eventually find out." He placed his hands over his stomach and pretended to get ready for a nap. There was something statuesque about his face when he relaxed it, as if this man was just one assassination short of having everything he wanted. Ann stepped closer, unsure of how to act with him when he had just made his intentions very clear.

He turned his head towards her.

"You're welcome to join in."

"Oh I don't doubt it."

He smiled but not out of happiness. "Four hours is a long time to watch someone sleep."

_He has the nerve to think he can play this game with a professional?_

Ann walked to the other side of the bed where he was lying and wondered how hard he was trying not to peek. Then she slipped one leg over him so lightly that the bed barely jolted until she had positioned herself on it, one leg between his. She rubbed it against him, but his eyes remained strictly closed.

"Now you can do better than that."

Ann smirked because it sounded more like a wish instead of teasing. His chest rose unevenly as she took the moment to gaze at his face again.

_How life changes us all._

His eyes opened and found hers still lost in a dream.

"What would Annie do?"

"She wouldn't be here."

"That's right."

He reached out to cup her face from the side and she found herself leaning into it. Then she sank deeper and all else got lost behind him. His kisses started softly on her chest from where they grew harder the further up he got, and she gasped until his lips found hers and smothered the sounds. For the first time in months she didn't care about anything. She grabbed him by the neck and wrapped her legs around him, never having wanted anything so much in her life. The feeling appeared to be mutual but still he gradually slowed down, no matter how hard she tried to hold on. She felt his fingers trace her lips, hastily and disoriented, as he distanced himself.

"It can't be here." He breathed hard and removed his jacket, clearly struggling. Ann wanted to argue but instead she fell backwards like a rag doll while Harris tried to compose himself on the edge of the bed.

It turned out to be a difficult four hours.

* * *

"Did you ever draw?" He asked, steering the wheel to the street where Ann's home was.

"No, I've never been particularly good at anything." She bit her lip at the last confession, not daring to look at Harris.

"Is that so?"

"Let's hope we won't wake my mother up." She quickly tried to change the subject but his mind had already gone to places where it was difficult to come back from.

"I think I want to meet her."

"What? No."

"Why? Do you think she won't find me an appropriate suitor?"

"I…what?" She realized the Ritalin was wearing off a little now. The conversation was too heavy before 6 am, or at any time of the day since they had still not discussed her plans for the coming day. She was still hoping the problem would solve itself by morning, in some way.

They had arrived to the house and to Ann's discomfort the lights were on.

_Another long night._

The front door opened and Grace's frail figure whizzed through before Ann could get out. Harris also exited from his side even though she frantically tried to make stop. This was not something she looked forward to discussing with her mother during breakfast coffee.

Ann almost crushed his hand pushing the door open when he tried to open it for her.

"Relax, Annie. There's no danger here."

"Before you do something stupid, I'd like to point out my mom has a gun."

He laughed and it was the kind she liked. It eased off her panic a little. She got out, eyeing him with warning but he seemed curious. How hard it was to keep up with him at this hour. Grace joined the two of them.

"Who might you be?"

"Harris Ryland ma'am. Just dropping off Ann here since her bike broke down."

"Ryland. What are you like a customer?"

Harris looked baffled and Ann cut in.

"It's a cleaning job. His mother is my boss."

"I thought the Rylands worked in transportation."

"Well they do cleaning too."

Grace didn't look the least bit sold and the way she was staring at Harris rather rudely was starting to bother Ann, even more than the full analysis he was clearly making on her in his mind.

"Thank you, Harris. For the ride." Ann said, hoping he would get the hint.

"My pleasure." He fixed his jacket and nodded at both women with a warm smile before he got back into the car and speeded off. They watched the fading tail lights in silence until Ann broke it.

"I'm sorry about…" She didn't know what she was sorry for.

"Well he seems like an asshole." Grace concluded and grabbed a pack of cigarettes from her robe pocket. Ann's brows furrowed but she was too tired to think. All she knew was that she didn't completely agree.

The morning was coming and along with it her final choice. It was a jump towards the unknown and possible danger in any case.


End file.
