Dallas 1. All I Need To Know

_Author's note: A sort of deleted scene that takes place in 2x08 between the fight and the funeral. It still gives me pain that there was barely any interaction between the 2x08 bedroom scene and the forgiveness scene in 2x10. I'd like to think they didn't spend all that time not speaking so here's my take on what could have happened after the fight._

It was the first time in eight wonderful years that Ann had felt that sting of fear in her chest. She had fought so long to come to terms with her past that it had never occurred to her there were side effects and they were now affecting the man who had saved her at a time when she had all but given up hope on finding love again. Everything had come crashing down once more.

_When will it end?_

She glanced at the clock. Almost 5 a.m. it said.

_Time goes on but we only move backwards._

She was certain Bobby had not slept either, most likely he was lying on J.R.'s bed going over every little detail of their life on the ranch and the missing years. Or maybe he was drinking and reminiscing about only the bad times. His need to be alone at a time like this was something Ann had come to learn was a part of him but she had never understood it. It hurt too much to even think how much pain he was keeping inside and how little physical space separated them in the end. Determined not to waste one more second of their precious and far too short lives on arguing she pulled the blanket off and got up.

It was as she had pictured it. He was lying on the bed in J.R.'s room but the duvet was untouched and he was on his side his back to her. The light coming from the crack of the door must have announced her presence but he didn't move. At least he didn't yell at her to leave and she took that as a positive sign. She walked to his side of the bed but as soon as she had got down on her knees beside him she was horrified by the deep sadness that he had allowed to surface in his eyes. She swallowed hard trying not to break down.

"Bobby…" She started and watched him carefully to see if he was ready to hear her speak again. As soon as the word had left her lips he closed his eyes with a heavy breath and the pain of not being able to touch him the way she used to was almost unbearable. She would wait a little more.

They remained in silence for a short while, Ann sitting on the floor and Bobby lying in the same position, occasionally looking at her. Every time she caught him her heart felt a bit lighter.

Eventually he spoke with a hoarse voice that held decades of grief she felt guilty for not quite understanding.

"It's just hard…all of it. You shouldn't have to see me like this."

Ann felt that crushing pain again and wished for more than anything to be able to help him in some way.

"I should see it all. I should be there, the way you were there for me, Bobby. I'm so grateful and I…"

"I know." He stopped her again but without the anger he had held back in their bedroom and she felt encouraged to stay. It could have been for the lack of energy but she didn't care.

Ann crawled in bed beside his weary body and put her hand on his shoulder, gently pulling him on his back. There was no resistance on his part and for a moment she felt they had recovered some of that peace that was lost when Harris had come back to mess with her life. It could still be salvaged, she was sure of it.

Ann looked him in the eyes, her hand at the top button of his shirt and the unvoiced question received a "yes" from him. It was in the way he blinked. Until that night he had not been a man of many words, even less of huge outbursts of emotion. None of those things were much like him and she was ashamed it had taken her this long to realize that all the unspoken feelings still existed there. They were only buried deep inside that understanding mind of his. Bobby had always known how to make her feel loved with the smallest of gestures. In all her years she had learned it was few men who possessed that gift.

She opened three buttons starting from the top feeling his heart beat under his warm, almost feverish chest. Knowing it was all due to his stress saddened her greatly and she almost bit her tongue trying to fight the tears. He already had enough to deal with, her own sorrows were of less importance right now. What she wouldn't have given to go back in time and somehow stop all this from happening, no matter how inevitable it was.

"Is that better?" She rubbed him gently in a way that used to calm him down but the tired eyes told her she was not of much help now.

"Oh Annie…your hands could heal almost anything in this world but they can't fix this." His eyes glistened as he stared at the ceiling and it broke her heart all over again.

When his gaze finally met hers she knew he was still there, with all his love and patience. Two people who both had those qualities would always make it.

"I'll wait, Bobby, I'll be here until the end of our days." She pulled her hand from under his shirt and stroked his cheek, trying to warm it up so that the familiar smile could appear there again.

He didn't say anything, only placed his hand over hers and she savored the moment as if it was their last. All the memories they had made came rushing back to her and they now meant more to her than ever. She couldn't bear the thought of spending one night apart from that man and she knew the day he smiled again would be one of the happiest of her life.


	2. Strong Hearts Beat Forever

_Author's note: I wanted to continue writing A/B stories and so I'm going to post them here since I'll likely only write oneshots. I asked for suggestions on Tumblr and one anonymous user suggested this, Ann riled up after punching Harris in the season 1 finale and then going to meet Bobby. I thought it would be fun, so here we go. This one is M rated. _

"Man, I feel like a woman!"

Ann sang at the top of her lungs and tapped the wheel, missing every beat but she didn't care. She had not felt this alive in months, and all it had taken was one punch, followed by a string of words that came out with the courage she had built for the last 20 years. Her fingers still hurt but in a good way, the way she would hurt after an intensive workout. She kissed her fist in gratitude and sang some more.

Even the traffic jam couldn't slow her down. Her shoulders continued to roll with the songs that followed while she unbuttoned her shirt, not caring about the curious eyes in the vehicle next to her. She heard sounds of horns being honked and knew the guy had missed his cue. It was the most freeing feeling to be able to tease more than one man in an afternoon. She detached the cord from her bra and placed it safely in the glove compartment. Its price could not be measured in dollars.

….

With a spring in her step she slammed the Tahoe's door shut and threw her head back inhaling the brisk Southfork air. It was clean from all the world's pollution and forever the same, the safest place on earth for her. She had been planning to go straight to Sue Ellen but seeing Bobby standing by the door, watching her the same way he had seven years ago, it became clear the adrenaline would have to be put into good use. It was a very different kind of a day after all.

For Bobby it had been a day like any other, the only difference being that he had cheated death once again and even though he had started to feel like he could do it forever, deep down he knew all those scares were leading him a little closer with every passing day. He wanted to make the most of them now, and for Ann he always would.

She marched up to him in a few long strides and without slowing down smirked at his baffled expression as she grabbed him by the collar and pulled him inside. The rural horse painting clattered on the wall behind his back, just as his heart almost jumped out of his chest. She had an outfit that meant business and even the thought of unwrapping her from the beautiful package excited him a little too much. Her hair smelled of coconut but then there was also that unique scent that he could never quite put his finger on. It set her apart from all the rest. He wrapped his arms around her, thinking what a wonderful dream had come to life with her and what a blessing it was to still get more of those days. With each one of her deepening kisses he became more and more intoxicated by that scent and as much as he tried to calm himself it proved to be impossible. As if on cue she took hold of his belt and tugged it roughly, right at his weakest moment.

"Woah Annie, what happened to taking it easy?" He managed to breathe out.

"You heard the doctor." She smiled innocently while swiftly unbuckling his belt with one hand. "He said you can do anything that feels good, so…let's put that theory to test shall we?"

He wanted to argue but everything had indeed felt good so far and he had a feeling that wasn't going to change in the moments that would follow. Her smile was the price he had fought for many times and when it appeared out of the blue, it had to be treasured for it could fade just as abruptly as it came. The sadness would always return to those big green eyes in such a beautiful way, it was as if they were made to express sorrow to those who didn't understand it. Harris must have loved her for that alone, he thought, that's why he wouldn't leave her in peace.

_If I live to be a hundred I'll never understand it._

He savored every last glimpse he had of that glowing face before she turned her head and pulled him firmly by the hand as she made her way towards the stairs. The stiletto heels caught his eye and he briefly wondered why she had chosen to dress that way. It was another thought he had to shake for life was too short to ask too many questions.

When they were at the door she turned around and he felt the life radiating from her, soaking him with a youthful energy he didn't know he still had in him. It hit him again just how much he loved her and before she could push him into the bedroom, which he was sure she intended to do, he slipped his hand behind her neck and pulled her into a long kiss that was full of meaning and a thousand unsaid words. They remained entangled for a while and when he finally let go, he could feel the shiver in her breath. Her eyes were cast downwards and he gave her one quick peck on the lips.

"I really love you Annie, so much."

A bright laughter escaped her lips and it was music to his ears. And even though her voice cracked a bit, he knew it was from knowing that they would always have this, whether it was in sickness or in health.

"Shut up and show me." She winked, pulling his belt off through the loops as she gently pushed him into the room. He obliged, mesmerized by her seductive skills that she didn't bring out so often.

She kicked off her shoes and he almost jumped when the heels clanked against the glass door. No cracks could be seen from where he was standing and in that moment he didn't dare to do a more thorough scan. Where did this little tiger come from?

"Come on big boy, we'll worry about the damage later." She called from behind.

When he turned around, her shirt was already flying to the floor and the little snapping sound revealed the purple bra was on its way too. The years had refused to leave much of a mark on her body and he never ceased to wonder how he got to be so lucky. To be able to touch her was a privilege, but to be loved by her, that was a dream. His breath got caught in his throat, not for the first time, and his hands fumbled on the cotton in an attempt to find the buttons without losing sight of her. She walked over grinning at his struggle and it made him smile too, until she took hold of his collar and ripped it downwards, causing a few buttons to pop. The sound of the fabric tearing combined with her blazing eyes made his heart skip a beat. He was about to cry out but the only sound that could be heard in the room was from the buttons rolling on the floor.

She quickly unbuttoned the rest and then pushed herself right into him as she started to pull the shirt off. His throat was dry and he could only lay his hands on her lower back, stifling the sounds that were about to come out when she moved to his chest kissing and sucking it in turn. It made his blood flow in new places and for one fateful moment he forgot he was standing. His feet buckled and in haste he stumbled several steps back, eventually taking hold of the curtain that ripped apart and took him down with it. He closed his eyes cursing the pain on his backside but when he opened them, she continued right where she had left off and when she unbuttoned his jeans, he forgot all about where he was and how he had ended there. Her hands were so soft, it amazed him how they could pull such rough moves sometimes.

He tried to get up to a proper sitting position but seeing how intently she stared at him while her hand worked wonders, he kept slumping down on his elbows time after time. It seemed to excite her even further and she slowly moved up, not losing the rhythm, and kissed him with no intention of letting him catch his breath. For those few seconds he floated on air and when her lips skidded to his jawline he moaned her name out loud, clutching her arms as if trying to hold on to that dream that he feared would always be too good to be true. He used that strength to pull them both up at once and then gave her another kiss as they moved to the side of the bed. Her cheeks were flushed and he could hardly take his eyes off her when he yanked the bed cover to the side. One surprise after another was what she was, and today he couldn't have been more grateful for that.

He laid her down and gently removed her pants and the underwear with them, sliding his hands down her legs that he couldn't get enough off. She tickled his chest with her toes and he quickly grabbed her foot to kiss it. The rays of sun made her skin glow as if in an overexposed photograph and he admired it, laying more kisses on it as a thank you for the love and the beauty she possessed. She arched her back anticipating the moment he would bring her to life and when he did, she fell into a haze, unable to stop repeating his name. Her fingers dived into his hair, caressing him and at times digging her nails into his head until he took her hands and force them down on the bed where she continued to scratch the sheet instead. He half-expected her to start hissing at any time.

And then she did, which was a first. After that he couldn't hold himself any longer and climbed on top of the long slender body that had curved in frustration. Her eyes had a curious spark in them and she instantly rolled him over with the strength she usually hid from him.

"Special doctor's orders, no heavy lifting today." She whispered in his ear.

He groaned, desire filling every last part of his brain.

"Well Annie, you're my favorite kind of a doctor..."

He felt himself sink into her and was unable to say any more. Her hands were above his head, keeping still as she worked for the both of them. The sheet crinkled underneath them and even the bed had started to bang loudly against the wall. He could barely hold onto her and when she changed the pace abruptly, he gasped out of breath. It was over almost instantly and he knew it was nothing serious. Unfortunately it had sounded much worse.

Her head was buried in the curve of his neck but he could feel her expression change, the way her mouth tightened while her hips still bounced on him softly.

"Are you okay?" She asked, still slowing down as she spoke.

"Just don't stop." He grimaced, clutching the back of her head. The curls brushed the back of his hands and his breathing grew stronger with each move she made on top of him. He didn't want to worry her and tried to hold his breath for the most part. It turned out to be a bad call because every sound he had been holding in, came out a few seconds later, and she stopped completely. Her eyes were filled with worry when they met his and as much as he wanted to scream at her to continue, he took a deep breath and gave her a warm smile.

"Trust me, you're making it better."

His eyes motioned her to lean lower and when her lips met his, he didn't let her go again. He made the kiss as deep and as all-enclosing as he possibly could from his weaker position. Every time she would try to retreat in an attempt to see how he was doing, he squeezed her hips with more demand. In the end she surrendered and he felt her tongue dance wildly against his, both muffling one another until he felt her body encase him. She barely made a sound and their lips were now touching each other only slightly, just as the tip of her tongue was trembling on his. When he thought she was at the end she suddenly slammed her hands on his shoulders and her nails dug into his skin again, but he only exhaled in satisfaction. Her body was hot, like a lifeline around him, connected to his every thought and need. He stroked her damp back softly while she panted and pressed herself into him as close as possible. It was an excruciating wait but at the same time he thought he could have remained there for the rest of his life.

Her fingers traced his jawline as she started rocking her hips again and her eyes were fully focused on his face, as if trying to be in control of every vital function in his body. He closed his eyes with all the gratefulness in the world as he dived into ecstasy and hugged her tightly until he could, only much later, regain his breath.

….

Her face was glowing and full of admiration he had never felt he really deserved from her. Love brought them so many things, some unexplainable, most of them irrational and each and every one of them worth living for. It was all he would ever need.

"Can you stay like this forever?" He thought out loud.

The reaction lasted a mere second, yet it revealed every fear that had been confined in her mind. Once it disappeared, it left a little glistening in her eyes.

She nodded but he knew it was a promise to be broken, one that would haunt them until the end of their days should she never trust him with the truth. He pushed the thought aside once again and decided to try something else.

"My doctor…he warned me about you."

"What, why?" She got on her elbow, alarmed.

Bobby chuckled. "Said it's only the strongest of hearts that can handle a pretty firecracker like you."

Ann lowered herself a little, not fully appreciating the compliment. He watched the fear float in her gaze and wished she would for once not worry so much.

"But I have a strong heart, Annie." He tapped his chest. "And it's all thanks to you."

The smile that had been gone for too long, came back and lit up her whole face. The most beautiful sight, he thought, as he wrapped his arms around the woman who had given meaning to his later years. What would he be like had she not come along? He wanted to return the favor every single day they still had left.

"I'm gonna be here for a long time. It's only fair." He smiled, looking at the beaming face in the crook of his arm.

_Damn right you will._ She thought.


	3. Break From the Storm

_A/N: Takes place in 2x13, in the evening but before they find out about Emma's crash. I was inspired to write after the beautiful new pictures we got, ahhhhh, still dying over them. And so, this is about them getting close again. I don't exactly know how it was supposed to happen on the show. I keep thinking about Ann saying to him in 2x15 that it was the first time she had seen him laugh in months so probably after that…I don't really know. This is my attempt to stick as close to the storyline as possible. Possibly M rated. I've written so much filth it's hard to tell anymore._

Patience had always been one of Ann's most prominent virtues - everlasting , unwavering and as the past had revealed, also her undoing. Yet she still had hope that the most collected nerves yielded the greatest results. It wasn't the time to push him for he had lost his lifelong challenger, the person whose soul was so deeply entwined with his, he rarely even acknowledged that the ruthless man inside he had spent decades fighting was as much part of him as it had been of JR. Ann had started to catch glimpses of him, in the form of distant stares and closed doors. Something ungodly was taking place in her home and it was sucking the life out of him, the little that had been left in that horrendous week between the news and the final farewell. It saddened her to know that he didn't think she understood the depths of his grief when she had such a clear view on it all. It wasn't the same as Emma. He didn't have to face the shame, but that was the primary reason and one that was difficult to explain to those who had not faced the ultimate sin, failing motherhood.

She thought about patience, one more day…would it make a difference? How much time would it take and when would it pass the point of no return, when she would no longer be patient but only indifferent towards him? The moment she had laid the dishtowel on the oven handle she remembered the hug he had allowed her earlier that day, in that same spot. It had been warm and welcoming and she had clutched onto his shoulders for dear life because his comfort was a luxury she had never, even for a second, taken for granted. And then just like that, it was gone and he was back to being only a shadow of the man that had once sworn to keep her close, no matter what. Her eyes welled up with tears for the guilt in her past and the affection she was forced to hold back these days. There had always been a dark cloud over her head with hope faintly flickering through the thick fog and one of those rays of light was sluggishly approaching the kitchen. She didn't have to see him, she could hear him retract to his shell the closer his footsteps came. It was like she was the only one in the house to hold that magnetic field against him and she hated it to the point it physically hurt in her chest.

Bobby leaned on the countertop the way he always did when he was about to start a serious discussion. It was the one place Ann wouldn't run away from because she was usually in the middle of something and leaving chores unfinished was not something she chose to do lightly. Still, it was not the lack of escape route that prompted Bobby to handle the uncomfortable situations this way, it was the fact he knew being there in her own world made her feel safer.

"That's quite a batch you're making there." He stated with half a smile as he gazed over the three baking sheets, each one rife with a different sort of muffins. The blueberry ones were the closest and he inhaled the aroma which gave him a warm feeling inside. He wasn't hungry but he loved seeing something alive in the house, even if it was just a kitchen being used for something else than the necessary meals. "Is there any particular reason for the feast?" He asked jokingly, trying to keep his tone light because he was certain she was in her own way trying to come to terms with what she had learned about Emma's drug usage.

"Anything other than getting you out of that room?" She said, pointing to the direction of the study. It shocked her how the shambles of her mind could be articulated so unambiguously and the emotion that was starting to pour out gave her yet another reason to remain her back turned to him. An image of his tired but content smile entered her mind as she took off her apron.

"It's times like these that I'm so thankful to have you in my life." He spoke out what seemed to have been pressing heavily on his mind but the tone of his voice and the distance between them left her insecure.

"Just these?" She said ruefully, wishing all of their conversations didn't have to be so grave. A single tear fell without warning and made a cold track from the corner of eye and down her chin until the remaining drop tingled inside her cleavage. Since she was little her eyes had resolutely refused to give her rest. They mirrored her soul more than was fair and there was no point in trying to hide the crying now. She hung the apron on a hook as she heard him approach her from behind, and tried to swallow the lump in her throat.

"You know it goes far beyond that, Annie." His hand landed on her shoulder protectively and she closed her eyes, barely able to take the loving touch that had been initiated by him after months of mostly refraining in cold manner. Scared that the moment would end soon she seized his hand to keep it in place and stroked each of his fingers the way she had done on their dates early on, back when they were both shy to make bolder moves. She only let go of him after she had fully turned around. The last remaining tears broke free through the bottom eyelashes but her mouth was twitched tightly shut. Bobby watched her in quiet agony.

"You have to believe me. Whatever I've said…in the heat of the moment. I could never let you go. I can't."

"Then show me. Make me believe what you say is true because lately…it hasn't felt that way." Her voice broke and she bit her tongue in hopes of keeping possibly more embarrassing revelations at bay. It had never come to begging before but she knew Bobby was still there under all that sadness and anger that they had let linger on for too long. Silence fell in the room and Bobby took her chin to lift her face up to meet his worried eyes that begged her in return. "It's always there, no matter what."

She looked back with an unreadable expression which confused him until she opened the first of the shiny rhinestone buttons on her white silk shirt. Underneath the thin fabric her fair skin glowed invitingly and with each button she revealed more of the underlying pain. Sadness took over him and he wanted nothing more than to stop her, close her in his arms and explain why she needn't worry, not ever in her life. But this was what she wanted and so he bent down and kissed the soft gap between her breasts, feeling her chest rise in gradual contentment. His fingers traced the strap of her bra when he slipped the shirt off her shoulder. "I love you." He whispered placing his head sideways to her heart but it wasn't enough for her, he could tell. The cold wind blew outside and rattled against the windows as her hands pressed his back against her, silently asking him to do the same to her. He got up and kissed her with all he had but she was stronger and surprised him by pulling him into her, which led to them both crashing against the countertop.

"Are you okay..." He tried to ask but she made him swallow his words right back down with another intensive kiss which woke him up for good. There was incomprehensible mumbling and a soft moan when she swiftly opened his shirt and laid her warm hands on his bare chest. He had missed it more than he knew and it didn't take long for his hands to fumble over the denim on her butt. The flashbacks to their nights of tender confessions and ever growing passion made him yearn for her so much he pulled her roughly by the hips, his mind hazy now. She responded by repeating his name over and over again, so softly and quietly he wasn't sure if it was her or his imagination that was running wild with impure thoughts. Guilt tore at his heart as he tried, for the first time, to brush out the memory of his brother and the mounting mess they were in, but her lips were gentle and proved him there was still life to be lived. They both let the feeling grow, enjoying the closeness and forgetting all about the storms in their path. Ann tickled his neck and then run her fingers up through his hair while her hips stroked him gently. It got to the point he had to break the kiss in order to catch his breath.

"You sneaky…" He grinned in between gasps for air but she shut him up by diving in again. This time his clothes were beginning to feel much too constricting and so he grabbed her by the hand, determinedly leading her to their bedroom. Ann had not felt such relief since she narrowly escaped jail time but she kept it to herself. The overwhelming gratitude for him and what he had made of her life was displayed on her face every time his hands touched her, with so little they did far more than anything she had medicated herself with in the past. She trembled under his warm body and whispered words of love into his ear with lips that had dried after being caught in the midst of their heated breathing. There was a glint of hope in his eyes when he said the words back, like a comforting rhyme that could only be heard in that specific tone when they were in their own private space. Ann wrapped her arms around his neck and wished the moment could last forever and it did go on for a long time later that night. In the dark she closed her eyes after being cradled to sleep in his arms while he remained awake and stared into the distance knowing she was the one person who could heal the pain. After everything they had gone through, it would still be there and it would always be the kind of love that would bring out the best in him.

She already was a much better person than she even knew. How lucky had he been.


End file.
