Castle 1. Lifeline

**Caskett Meeting AU. When Beckett gets pregnant with (author's choice)'s child, the father abandons his girlfriend and baby. Beckett meets Castle, who is her OB/GYN when she goes to have appointments for her baby. (Anonymous prompt from the castlefanficprompts tumblr).**

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The nineteen-year-old gave a loud sigh as she wriggled around on the uncomfortable medical bed, pulling down on the hem of her cotton, white polo shirt as it rode up, then gave a small self-deprecating huff.

_Could have been more worried about your modesty five months ago, Kate._

Her hazel eyes glanced curiously around the room as she waited for the OB/GYN to arrive, quickly moving her gaze away from the terrifying looking equipment on the table a few metres away. However, the posters plastered all over the walls of happy families which consisted parents holding their new-born between them was just as terrifying to her.

As she let out another shaky sigh, the large wooden door swung open.

"Sorry for making you wait," The doctor said, assuming that her large exhale was directed at him, but she quickly cut him off, her voice instantly showing her nervousness.

"No, it's fine." She dismissed as he sat in the chair to her left, next to the small screen and tools.

"I'm Dr Rick Castle," He introduced, stretching out his palm for a handshake, which Beckett returned weakly, willing her hand not to tremble, "Before we begin, Ms Beckett," He said whilst opening up the file he was holding in his right hand, "Did you just transfer to this hospital?"

Kate's eyebrows furrowed slightly as she nervously tucked a strand of her long, dark brown hair behind her ear, "No? I've been registered here since I was a child."

The doctor hummed, though he didn't seem satisfied with the answer, "Have you been having your prenatal appointments somewhere else? Because we don't have any record of your eight week or fourteen week appointments."

She looked down guiltily, already feeling like an awful mother, "This is my first appointment." She explained in a quiet voice, not meeting his gaze.

"Oh," He exclaimed quietly, his focus broken from writing on the papers, "Why did you decide to make an appointment at twenty weeks then?" He asked, curiosity present in his words.

_Because I felt the baby kick and it stopped me from being able to cry myself to sleep like I have been every other night for the past six months._

Her outward response was only a shrug, and Kate hoped that he wouldn't follow up on her answer, which thankfully he didn't as he continued with the procedure.

"Okay, Ms Beckett, could you just lift up your top for me?" He requested in a calm tone, and she complied immediately, letting the hem rest just beneath her breasts.

She watched as Dr Castle grabbed a bottle from a shelf underneath the ultrasound screen. He poured a small amount of the clear gel onto his palm, then wiped it on the paper towel next to him.

Rick noticed Kate's hesitance, so he attempted to make her feel as relaxed as possible, "Don't worry, the gel is heated up." He reassured, but the frown stayed evident on her face. He slowly brought the tube of gel above his patient's stomach and squeezed, Kate gasping quietly at the sensation.

Once enough gel was applied, he reached for the transducer and began to glide it over the gel. He looked up at Kate, who still looked uncomfortable and extremely worried, her lower lip trapped between her teeth as she exhaled with large breaths.

"Have you been feeling nauseated?"

"Yeah, sometimes." She replied honestly, but failed to mention the fact that it could have been from the image of her mother's lifeless body crumpled over in an alley, the crimson blood soaking through her light coloured blouse, her face slack and pale. The image that would never leave Kate's brain.

"Sometimes. Not often?" He prodded, his eyes never straying from the wavy black and white lines that were beginning to emerge on the small monitor.

"Sometimes." She reiterated, not wanting to look at the image on the screen, not wanting it to be real.

"So not enough to be prescribed medication?"

"I'm fine." She replied instantly, the words she had been telling everyone numerous times over the past few months, the words that carried no meaning any more, the words that were lies.

"Have you been leaking fluid, or had any vaginal spotting or bleeding?"

"Not that I know of." She replied awkwardly, her fingers pulling at loose threads that hung underneath the thin cushioned mattress she's laying on as she stared up at the white ceiling, the bright lights creating black spots in her vision whenever she blinked.

A few moments of silence passed, before a loud thumping noise resonated around the entire room.

Her baby's heartbeat.

_Her _baby.

The emotion Kate had been holding back abruptly came out in a choking sob, almost startling the doctor as the involuntary move she made to curl up nudged his arm. The teenager pressed the heels of her palms harshly on her eyelids, willing herself to stop crying, because she knew when she starts, it just begins again. The panic attacks, the fear, the pain.

She then felt a warm presence of his hand on her shoulder, but refrained from peeking out behind her fingers.

"Don't worry, this is a natural reaction to the baby's heartbeat." Dr Castle explained, the sympathy and calmness and care wrapping around each syllable.

"I'm so fucked up."

Rick's mouth gaped open slightly at her shaking voice as she began to cry harder between shallow, struggling breaths. He immediately retracted the ultrasound device and wiped her stomach of the sticky fluid, slowly pulling her top back down to its original position before gently hoisting her upwards so she was in a sitting position. And even after those several moments, the patient was still gasping for air between sobs, so he brought his chair over and wrapped an arm around her, his fingers drawing circles on her shoulder.

"I know how you feel." He finally commented, but Kate recoiled instantly, her previously dejected eyes now filled with anger.

"Stop saying that! Everyone says that! You don't fucking know how I feel! Was your mother murdered in an alley six months ago? Is your father so drunk that you have to lock him in his own apartment and check up on him every twelve hours? Did you drop out of college because you couldn't stand the thought of trying to live a normal life anymore? Did you let a random guy in a club fuck you while you were high and intoxicated to make the pain go away? Have you cried yourself to sleep every night? Have you felt so low that you thought you could just disappear and it wouldn't fucking matter?"

Her voice cracked through the last sentence, and the loud cry that released itself from her throat cut through her reverie, but the doctor stayed silent as she mustered up the power to continue.

"I can't do this." She whispered, then repeated the phrase two more times, as if it was a mantra to herself, her body shaking under his grip.

"You know what all that tells me?" Rick finally spoke up, her eyes still downcast, staring at the white tiles on the floor, "That you're strong." Kate scoffed loudly, but he continued on, "You've gone through all that, and you're still here."

She shrugged, but the sobs racking her body slowed to a few stray tears falling down her reddened cheeks, leaving black mascara lines, "I don't want to be."

"But you are." He supplied, but she shook her head, "And you're doing it for your Dad, aren't you?" Her eyes snapped up to his, looking defensive, but he ploughed through, "That shows that you care."

"But I can't care for _it_." She said glumly, her hand gesturing towards her slightly raised stomach.

"You're at this appointment. That shows you care for your baby." Rick reasoned, still speaking in a quiet hushed tone. At her silence, he began to speak again, "You don't have to keep the baby, you know."

She shook her head fervently, "No." His face turns questioning, so she explains, "I would get hung up on the what if's. I already have enough of those stuck in my head." Her left hand lifted to rub against her forehead as she let out a large sigh. "Besides, as much as I hate my situation, I can't bring myself to give it up."

"Her."

The teenager's wide eyes finally made contact with his, which still looked as calm and comforting as when she came in, despite all the information she had bombarded him with over the short period of time.

"Her." He repeated, "It's a girl."

Kate's gaze focused once again on the small screen, plastered with photos the doctor had taken during the ultrasound. She could see everything so clearly despite the grainy texture; the small head, the little peak of the nose, the rounded belly, the little legs sprawled out in front.

It even looked like the baby is giving a thumbs up with her right hand, which despite everything, made Kate huff out a chuckle.

Rick immediately felt a flush of warmth after seeing Kate smile for the first time during the appointment, "See? She's cheering you on from in there."

"Johanna." Kate stated matter-of-factly, her glistening eyes never leaving the screen, "Her name's going to be Johanna."

Dr Castle nodded curtly, "A beautiful name."

She rolled her eyes good-naturedly, "I bet you say that to all the girls."

He can't even think of a response when he sees her donning a fully-fledged grin, her tongue poking out from behind her pearly teeth. He silently cursed himself as she looked away from his stare, but couldn't help noticing that her cheeks had blossomed a slightly pink tint, and this time, it's not to do with tears.

Kate assumed that the appointment must be finished, so she slowly rose up from the hospital bed and leant down to grab her bag, slinging it over her shoulder. When she looked back up at the doctor, he was holding out a small rectangular card for her. She reached out to take it with a shy smile, but it dropped with his next words.

"Call me."

Immediately, a refusal fell from her lips, "No, I can't. I'm not in the place to have a relationship right now."

His mouth opened slightly as he shook his head, "No, no, no. That's not what I meant." He apologised bashfully, skimming a hand through his hair, making a small area near the front stick up haphazardly. "I meant it as a helpline. If you ever need information, or help, or support. Any time, any day."

"Thanks, but I don't need your pity."

"But you do need a friend." He replied without a beat, "And I'm offering to be one."

"I couldn't possibly…"

"Please. Let me help you and little Joey."

"Only if you never call her Joey." She rebutted sharply, but the small smirk growing on her face contradicted her tone of voice.

He pursed his lips and looked upwards, as if he was weighing up the decision before responding, "Deal."

"Thank you, Dr Castle."

"Always happy to help, Ms Beckett. Be safe."

And when she pushed through the double doors of the hospital and returned to her car, she had felt like a weight has been lifted from her shoulders.

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**Might possibly write a follow-up to this story? Not sure, please tell me what you think, I'd really appreciate it!**

**Thanks for reading!**

**Lou xo**


	2. Helpline

**Remember that time I filled a prompt and said I was going to expand on it and write a few more chapters? Probably not, so I added the follow up to the first part for your convenience. ****Sorry I took so long to churn this one out!**

**Anyway, hope you enjoy!**

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Kate let out a shaky sigh as she rested her forehead on the rim of the toilet seat, instantly flinching at the coolness of the porcelain against her boiling forehead, the beads of sweat sticking to the roots of her messily tied back hair. Before she could take another deep breath, she felt another upheaval of vomit, clenching her eyes shut tightly as she did so, wincing at the burning sensation that ripped through her throat once she was finished.

She thought back over her day at what could have caused the sudden wave of illness, and the best solution she could muster up was the ready-made spinach salad that she bought from the supermarket on her way home from visiting her father, since she knew her fatigue would be too overwhelming for her to make anything for herself when she finally crashed through the door of her apartment after the long and uncomfortable ride on the subway.

Kate stayed perched over the toilet for a few more minutes until she felt less lightheaded, then slowly stood back up to make her way over to her bed, her knees knocking together as she rose. Once she was upright, she walked over to the sink to rinse out her mouth, and her eyes raked over the reflection staring back at her. Her head tilted slightly as she took in her appearance in the darkness surrounding her.

Small tendrils of hair were sticking up in all directions from her clammy palms running over her scalp, her skin and lips were paler than she'd ever seen, almost rivalling the colour of the white towels that hung haphazardly on the rack behind her. The purple bags under her eyes almost looked as if they were engraved there as she ran her fingertips over the deep semi circles.

Slowly, her watery eyes fell onto her growing baby bump, which was almost at full size now that she was over seven months pregnant. Absentmindedly, she noted that her bump seemed to have changed position since when she last saw herself in the mirrors that were plastered over the elevator walls in her building. Her small hand tentatively stroked over her stomach, a weak chuckle leaving her closed lips when she felt a miniscule kick from her little girl.

"No more acting up, okay?" Kate whispered, looking down at the bump, "Mom needs to get some sleep."

As she went to bed, she tried not to dwell on the fact that this was the first time in months that when she said 'Mom', she wasn't referring to the woman who inadvertently caused her life to come crashing down all those months ago.

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The loud wail of a police siren from outside her window extracted Kate from her slumber as she cracked one eye open to see the time on the clock that was perched on her bedside table; 4:17am. She turned over carefully in an attempt to go back to sleep, but was disturbed from doing so by the small discomfort in her stomach.

She groaned loudly at the interruption, guessing that she probably had to go to the bathroom once more, so she slowly peeled back the lilac covers of her bed.

Except her usually light coloured bed sheet was covered in dark red.

With a loud yelp, she bolted upwards, and her eyes bulged as she saw the dark colour covering her thighs and mattress. Out of habit, she placed a cautious hand on her bump as she ripped herself from her ruined bed as she ran to her dresser to grab her phone, salty, sticky tears streaming down her face for the umpteenth time that night.

She dialled the number instinctively, not thinking twice. Two excruciatingly long rings were heard before a voice spoke up.

"Hello?"

Kate couldn't speak, her words masked by the strangled gasps falling from her mouth.

"Hello?" The voice repeated, now laced with concern.

She licked her lips as she forced herself to take a deep breath, willing herself to stop shaking violently, "B-Blood."

Once the person on the other line heard the teenager's weak voice, it immediately clicked in his brain.

"Ms Beckett? Kate? What's wrong?" Dr Castle asked, the words coming out in a jumble as he sat up from his bed, turning on the lamp as he tried to concentrate.

"There's blood." She spoke quietly whilst shaking her head, "Blood everywhere."

He inhaled, "Okay, you need to call 911, Kate."

"But-"

"It's okay, they'll help you. Everything will be okay." Rick assured, swinging his feet from his mattress, the soles instantly hitting the cold floor beneath him.

"I'm scared." She whimpered, harshly pressing her hand over her eyes, wiping away the constant stream of tears.

"I'll meet you there. I promise." He replied in a calm tone as he grabbed his scrubs from the wardrobe with his free hand.

He cut off the call before Kate could murmur a 'thanks'.

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Kate waivered in and out of consciousness in the ambulance, only registering a few minute details.

Lying down. Jerking around. Head lolling.

"Katherine Beckett. Nineteen years old. Thirty-two weeks pregnant."

The prick of a needle. Left arm.

"Baby has otherwise been healthy."

Oxygen mask over her nose and mouth.

"Only on mediation for depression, shouldn't react badly to any other substances."

A frail, cold hand in hers.

"Ms Beckett, can you hear me? Squeeze my hand."

Blackness.

* * *

Rick sprinted through the hospital entrance doors, not bothering to apologise to the other doctors he frightened with his outburst. He scurried over to the front desk, the rude receptionist looking up at him from under her false eyelashes.

"What's gotten your knickers in a twist, Castle?" She sneered, her red painted lips turning upwards.

"Patient. Katherine Beckett. Room?" He panted, his hands placed on the desk, holding himself up.

The worker nodded briefly, her long, manicured nails hovering quickly over the keyboard, the clacking sound resonating in the almost deserted hospital.

"Room 147." She stated, giving out a small huff as Rick instantly ran off to the elevator, pressing the button repeatedly as he shifted nervously from foot to foot.

* * *

As he approached the room, two nurses walked out, closing the door behind them as they chatted, one of them flailing her hands around exaggeratedly as the other laughed behind her hand. He approached them hastily, causing them to abruptly stop their conversation.

"Hi, Dr Rick Castle-" He spoke, but he was quickly cut off.

"Oh, so _you're_ the Rick she's been asking for." One of the nurses commented snidely as she pointed in the direction of the white, heavy door.

He ignored the derogatory comment as soon as he laid eyes on her through the small, tinted door window.

* * *

The door swung open, making Kate's head whip round, her lips forming a small smile as her eyes focused on her visitor.

"You came." She spoke softly, her voice carrying an almost disbelieving tone.

Rick immediately sat in the seat to her right, gently stroking the arm that wasn't injected with an IV, the sleeve of her light blue hospital gown bunching up beneath his fingertips, "Of course I did." He replied, keeping his voice as quiet as hers, as if not to startle her.

"You took a while. Thought you weren't coming." Kate said, her eyes now shining with a small amount of mischief instead of sorrow.

"Your vehicle had sirens. Mine didn't. Not very fair, is it?" He huffed, but her weak chuckle instantly brought a grin to his face.

Kate lifted her left hand and gently moved it his palm from her upper arm, making Rick instantly worry that he had made his patient uncomfortable. However, before he could voice his concern, she gingerly brought his hand down to the thin mattress of the hospital bed and gingerly wrapped her smaller digits around his.

"Thanks." She whispered, only looking at their intertwined hands.

He squeezed her hand back in response.

* * *

"I've become so attached to her now." Kate spoke in a gentle voice after a couple of minutes of silence, making Rick's head whip back around from staring out of the window at the night city lights, back to her pale face, though it now showed a small smile.

She continued with her head staring down at her belly, "I went shopping the other day, to get some food for my Dad," Rick nodded at the statement, taking a mental note that her father was still recovering, "and I bought her a little onesie."

Her small smile turned into a grin, her teeth showing from behind her chapped lips, which made the doctor instantly mirror her expression.

"It had little elephants on it," The smile dimmed slightly, "They were my Mom's favourite. She used to say that they were so kind and smart." Her eyebrows furrowed, "She always wanted to visit a country that had elephants."

Rick easily caught her distressed tone, and attempted to make her feel better as best as he could, "Maybe you could go with baby Joey one day." He shrugged with a smile.

Her lips upturned again, this time into more of a smirk, "I'll consider sending you a postcard if you stop calling her Joey."

Despite the circumstances, the two managed to let out a small chuckle each.

* * *

They both sat in silence for a while, Rick trailing his thumb along the back of Kate's palm in relaxing circles as she glared out of the window, trying to block out the panicked noises of the hospital; the cries of patients, the shouts of doctors, the beeping of monitors.

"What if I lose her?"

Rick's gaze snapped up to meet hers, the hazel orbs filling with moisture at the mere thought.

He sighed with a frown, "I can't promise that won't happen, but I'll help you through it if it does."

To his surprise, Kate gave a curt nod as if she was happy with his answer.

After being lied to about how it gets better, how the pain will lessen with each passing day and how she'll adapt to her new individual life soon, she was impressed with the honesty the doctor had offered to her.

Rick's voice cut through her thoughts, "You're about thirty weeks along now, right?"

"Thirty two." She agreed.

"_If _there are complications," He began, Kate noting that he put a lot of emphasis on the 'if', "She could be delivered."

Kate nodded slowly, taking this information in before responding, "But would she be… okay?" She asked timidly, feeling stupid for asking the question.

If it was a silly question, the doctor didn't show any sign of judging as he informed her, "She'll be thinner than most babies, about three to five pounds. She's less likely to have serious disabilities than if she were born before 28 weeks, but there is the possibility that she could have learning or behavioural problems."

Kate took in the information with wide eyes, shifting them around the room as the thought about his words.

"But to answer your question," He continued, "Yes. She'd be okay. She'd be great."

* * *

It was Rick who interrupted the next period of silence.

"So, your file says you've been seeing a therapist?" He asked tentatively, but figure the question would be safe to ask since they had already conversed about quite personal topics during their wait for the results.

Kate nodded calmly, "He helps."

"I'm really glad to hear that." He replied with obvious pride, making Kate squirm in discomfort.

"I'm not ready to be the kind of person I want to be yet." She warned, repeating the words she had stated to her shrink so many times over the past few months. He nodded with a glum look of understanding at her confession.

"But I'm getting there."

The small spark of positive thinking made his smile increase tenfold, "There's no rush, Kate."

* * *

Kate let out an exhale, resting her head onto the scratchy pillow as she glanced at the bare black and white clock that was hung over the door. Squinting at the numbers, she calculated that she (and Rick) had been waiting for four hours for her results.

As if she could feel her impatience, the nurse suddenly walked in with a brown wooden clipboard with multiple pieces of paper clasped onto it.

Unconsciously, Kate's hand gripped tightly onto Rick's, so he offered a comforting smile in her direction before her began to talk.

"So, what was the problem?" He asked vaguely.

"Ms Beckett," The nurse with the name tag 'Kathy' began, basically ignoring Rick's presence, "You mentioned when you arrived that you had been vomiting, correct?"

"Y-Yes." Kate stuttered, suddenly feeling that she had done something wrong as she saw the nurse's glare.

"The movement that you did while you were crouched over made the baby's head bang onto your cervix." Kathy read from the paper in monotone.

Kate breathed in a sharp exhale, but Rick's thumb tracing circles on her skin assured her that it was going to be okay.

"With the pressure that is on your cervix at the moment, it's not surprising that a small burst of blood was released." She explained, Kate's shoulders slumping in relief.

"So she's okay?" Kate asked, just to be certain.

"The scans indicate that she's fine, just moving into position to be born in a couple weeks' time."

Kate opened her mouth to thank the nurse, but no words came out as her throat began to feel like it was closing up. Rick seemed to understand immediately though, thanking the nurse and sending her on her way.

Sticky, warm tears ran down Kate's face as she allowed herself to cry from relief, unaware of how tense she had been until the threat was removed, her shoulders shaking from the force of her crying. Rick stayed in his place, but ran his large palm up and down her arm as a reminder that he was there, which she greatly appreciated.

Once she had calmed down slightly, she pulled away, hastily wiping her tears away, "God, why do I always cry around you?"

He decided to test the waters, "Maybe it's a sign that you need comfort?"

She smiled at his compassion, her eyes still shining, "I wouldn't say no to a hug."

Carefully, Rick sat up from his chair and wrapped his arms around her, making sure not to put any pressure on her as he leaned down. She lifted her chest up to make contact with his, her arms curling around his shoulders tightly as her head tucked into the crevice of his neck, his head turning to place a gentle kiss to her head.

* * *

The journey in his car back to her apartment was silent, the two of them silently basking in the feeling of relief that washed over them, Rick noticing that Kate was absentmindedly stroking her bump with her left hand as she watched the sun rise, the dashes of pinks and oranges illuminating her face, a much appreciated change from the snow white her porcelain skin had been for the past few hours.

They finally reached her door, and Kate tilted her head up to look at him, a sad smile gracing her features.

"I'm sor-" She began, but was soon cut off.

"No, you don't get to say you're sorry," He stated in a firm tone, Kate recoiling slightly at the seriousness of his words.

He immediately paused for a moment, then approached her another way, "I'm very happy you called." A warm upturning of her lips enthused him to go on, "I don't mean to sound condescending, but you made the right decision."

Instead of a retort of _what other decision is there when my bed's covered in blood_, Kate bit her lower lip bashfully, "Thanks. I'm just trying to do what's best for Johanna." She whispered, a sense of awe wrapping around her words.

"Which is wonderful, as long as you're doing what's best for you too." He replied hesitantly.

Her next words made his face break out into a fully-fledged grin.

"I think I am."

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**Still have some thoughts about doing an epilogue, let me know if you'd be interested and thank you for all the follows already! Thanks for reading, loves :)**

**Lou xo**


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