Glee 1. Chapter 1

Summary:

Everyone thought that they had Rachel Berry all figured out but when a series of events cause Rachel to reach her limit ,the Gleeks see a side of Rachel that they haven't seen before.

Disclaimer: Glee does not belong to me no matter how much I wish it did. I don't own the ocean I'm just taking a dip.

A/N: I'm mixing and moving things around to suit the story I have in my head so things won't follow the shows timeline or won't have something's.

Prologue:

People make assumptions, you say one thing and they hear another and then that thing that they think you said gets told to someone else and so-forth until its disoriented and the farthest thing from the truth.

After all the gossip has been spread and all the stories have been told people assume to know _YOU. _And you don't correct them because A.) You don't want to cause a stir or B.) You simply don't care what people are saying about you or at least you act like you don't. But everyone has their limits, a point where you can't handle the gossip, rude remarks and judgment anymore.

I've let people at McKinley twist my words and hurl insults my way since the beginning of school about six months ago and I always brush them off because no matter what, they assume and judge and twist my words or actions to what would suit them.

You would think that in a little club full of social outcast or misfits people would be a welcoming place for Rachel it was not, most everyone else was excepted despite their flaws or treatment towards the other club members outside of the Glee room.

Rachel was very tolerant to them all no matter how cruel they were towards her she had other things to worry about she didn't need to spend time fussing over people who claimed to be a family but treated her otherwise.

She knew that the Glee club thought she was loud, controlling, a know it all and that she only wanted to get on Broadway and that wasn't exactly true there was more to Rachel than they thought, there was a reason behind everything she did but no matter how many times she tried to explain or reason with them they assumed they knew what she was going to say or why.

To be honest she was getting tired of it all ,She wanted to go Fuck themselves ,she smiled a bit to herself as she thought of the looks on their face when "prim ,uptight "Rachel Berry cursed at them .

Ignore it she it she told herself just keep acting like it rolls right off you. She rolled her shoulders a bit before walking into the choir room, she hoped that the drama and insults would be kept at a minimum today after the news she got yesterday she really wasn't in the mood, after all even she had her limits.

***Peeks out from behind computer***

**So, Whattaya think? I don't have a beta so any mistakes are mine also if you're interested in being my beta please send me a message. Anyway reviews are like chocolate and I'm seriously addicted!**

**Lotsa love , Winter.**


	2. Chapter 1: When you get a call

n

**Summary:**

Everyone thought that they had Rachel Berry all figured out but when a series of events cause Rachel to reach her limit ,the Gleeks see a side of Rachel that they haven't seen before.

**Disclaimer:** Glee does not belong to me no matter how much I wish it did. I don't own the ocean I'm just taking a dip.

**A/N**: I'm mixing and moving things around to suit the story I have in my head so things won't follow the shows timeline or won't have something's.

**Rachel's POV:**

"Hey, Man hands ! What do you think your doing?"

Great! I can't even make it to my seat without someone questioning me!

" I'm just taking a seat, Santana is that a problem?"

"Well sit your crazy ass somewhere else hobbit I wanna sit here!"

Moments such as the one currently happening ,unfortunately were not uncommon for Rachel .Sighing she looked around at the members who had arrived and were looking on at the "argument". Quinn was sitting next to Finn on the second level risers looking at her with a raised eye brow , Mercedes and Kurt were staring probably hoping for an a big scene that they could gossip about later. Artie,Tina and Mike were sitting by the door watching with little interest.

Rolling her eyes Rachel grabbed her bag that was next to her and moved to sit in the back . It wasn't that Rachel was afraid of Santana or Intimidated by Quinn's stare ,she just wasn't in the mood to argue over something as mundane as a seat.

She knew that they all were probably expecting her to blow up and rant about her being there first or something but usually when she "goes all diva" and complains before "stomping out" because that's what they think she usually does. The key words being they think , most of the time when she starts to talk someone interrupts her before she can finish and try to act like they already know what she is going to say, and when she asks for solo's the others act like she demands it when she usually doesn't all she really does is make a request as opposed to them who just sit around waiting for Mr. Shue hand it to them without them demonstrating interest and then bitch and moan when they aren't given what they feel they yeah, so maybe sometimes she leaves but it's only because she knows that if she stays she'll end up calling them all out and that will cause an even bigger argument .

Tapping her foot in irritation Rachel looked over at the clock it was already 20 minuets past the start of Glee club and Mr. Shue still hadn't arrived all of the other members had already gotten there and were playing around, Sam and Noah were throwing a football around and Brittany was sitting next to the seat that she had given up for Santana talking animatedly about Lord Tubbington.

Glee club was only supposed to be about an hour long and she had places to be afterwards, pulling out her phone she started checking her email when finally Mr. Shue decided to grace them with his presence.

"Sorry I'm late guys"

Rachel watched as he put down his satchel and walk over to the whiteboard

"Okay so I have a great idea for this weeks assignm-"

A loud ringing cut him off and Rachel blushed slightly when she realized it was her phone that was ringing ,hitting ignore she muttered out an apology

"Anyways as I was saying this wee- " huffing slightly looked over at her with slight irritation "Maybe you should answer"

Nodding slightly she looked down at her phone and froze slightly when she saw the name on her screen ,she took in a shaky breath before answering

"Hello, This is Eliora Puckerman from Lima Medical Center I am calling to speak with Rachel Berry?"

Rachel felt her heart pounding against her chest, clearing her through a bit she answered " This is she"

"Rachel I am so sorry to inform you but we have a Berry here and she is in very critical condition we feel it would be best if you could get here as soon as possible , The doctors are trying everything they can to maintain her stable but she is in very critical condition"

Rachel stood frozen for a second staring straight processing what she was just told , a sob broke threw her chest and she dropped down on the riser making her seat fall over with a loud thud with shaky hands she brought the phone back up to her ear "I'll be there soon " she whispered brokenly into the phone

She brought her arms around her chest as if to hold herself together and sobbed , she sat for less than a minuet before snapping out of it and looking around frantically for her bag,grabbing it she shot up from the ground and stumbled down from her spot on the top risers frantically trying to wipe the tears from her eyes so she could see clearly she practically ran out of the room with people shouting questions at her as she went.

**OK so whattaya think? **

** I don't have a beta so any mistakes are mine, if your interested please let me know and if you're not interested in beta-ing but wouldn't mind me bouncing ideas off of you send me a PM , Anyways Reviews are love.**

**Lots of love , Winter.**


	3. Chapter 2: Let's all guess

**Summary:** Everyone thought that they had Rachel Berry all figured out but when a series of events cause Rachel to reach her limit ,the Gleeks see a side of Rachel that they haven't seen before.

** Disclaimer:** Glee does not belong to me no matter how much I wish it did. I don't own the ocean I'm just taking a dip.

**A/N:** I'm mixing and moving things around to suit the story I have in my head so things won't follow the shows timeline or won't have something's.

3rd Person POV:

The Gleeks stood staring at the door for a beat before starting to make assumptions.

"Someone probably called to tell her they burned her hideous sweater collection," Santana said in her usual snarky tone.

"She looked really sad San like if someone sucked all the happy out of her or stole her unicorn," Brittany replied with a confused look on her face ,which in itself wasn't that uncommon.

"Don't worry Britt, I bet man-hands will tell us all about whatever it is Monday. She's an attention seeker that way," said Quinn while rolling her eyes.

Finn who was next to Quinn furrowed his eye brows and shared a look with Puck. They'd booth seen that look of heartbreak on peoples face before and hoped that what they were wrong.

Mercedes and Kurt sat still with their eyes and ears open, trying to follow all the conversation in the room with the hope of getting some good gossip on the subject .

Mike, Matt, and Sam sat in the back worried about the little diva. Sure none of them really hung out with the girl but they were all family and none of them had ever seen her so upset, she was tough so to see her like that was unsettling.

Tina and Artie were just trying to stay out of it they were sure that once someone knew something they all would know.

Puck sat debating whether to stay seated or run out and try to catch his Jewish-American Princess. He had gotten pretty close to her since that one week they dated about three months ago. He knew that they broke up for his sake, he could see it on her face when she told him that she knew that his feelings for Quinn were still there, and he was angry and confused with everything that had been going on that he didn't fight her on it. But even before they had gotten close he had been one of her biggest tormentors and nothing that anyone ever did or said was enough to make her break down.

He was sure that whatever that phone call was about was a big deal.

Mr. Schuester sighed and rubbed his temple. There was always some kind of drama in his class and usually it revolved around the small girl who just ran out of the room.

It was obvious that everyone was distracted and not up to paying attention so he figured it would probably be best to just let them Monday he would just go with one of the many suggestions he was sure that Rachel would come up with.

"Alright guys, why don't we just call it a day. We can meet back upon Monday and work on some stuff then." As soon as Mr. Schuester said that everyone quickly got up and left.

The gleeks were glad to have a few extra hours of their weekend free even if it was thanks to Rachel .

**Ok so first I wanna thank my Beta Audrey Noxy for helping me out and just being fantastical in general I know it's not easy following my train of thought ;) Second I know this chap is short but I promise the chaps that follow will definitely be way longer. Anyway Whattaya think? Leave some love people ;)**


	4. Chapter 3: I'd rather not face reality

**Summary:** Everyone thought that they had Rachel Berry all figured out but when a series of events cause Rachel to reach her limit ,the Gleeks see a side of Rachel that they haven't seen before.

**Disclaimer:** Glee does not belong to me no matter how much I wish it did. I don't own the ocean I'm just taking a dip.

** A/N:** I'm mixing and moving things around to suit the story I have in my head so things won't follow the shows timeline or won't have something's.

**Rachel's POV:**

I can hear my heart beat pounding in my ears a wild rhythm, that combined with my shaky hands the frantic thoughts running through my head made tears begin to run down my face.

That feeling you have when you're not sure if you're awake or dreaming. That's how I felt right now, like I didn't really get a call with horrible terrifying line. I was just stuck in some awful dream where I wanted to wake up but couldn't and when I finally do wake up I can just wipe away the tears that leaked out and everything would be alright.

I tried as hard as I could to make myself believe that but a part of me was screaming that this wasn't a dream and that I needed to hurry. I wanted to cling with all I had to the idea that this was just some nightmare but at the same time I couldn't indulge myself with that. I needed to face reality.

I sped down the road and weaved in and out of the few cars that were on the road in hopes to get to the hospital faster.

'Please, please, please, let her be okay!' I silently prayed I shrieked loudly and hit my dashboard hard when I was forced to stop at a red light.

"NO, NO HURRY UP!" I sobbed and pulled frustrated at my hair. I blew out a big shaky sigh of relief when the light finally turned green. Finally after what felt like hours of driving I pulled into the Hospital's parking lot. Parking the car I pushed the door open and slammed it close with a hard shove as I turned and ran towards the hospital

"I got a call, I-I'm here for Eliana B-Berry, please," I told the receptionist whose light blue eyes looked at me with pity.

"I know honey, let me call Nurse Sarah and she can take you to her OK?" She softly asked me and I nodded and looked at her for a second before realizing that she was the same receptionist that I saw almost every day that I came to the hospital to visit.

"Berry?" A woman with curly brown hair and green eyes called out to her. Rachel assumed that this was Nurse Sarah

"Yes," I answered

"Is there anyone else we need to call or-?"

"No, Just me for now I will call everyone else later can you take me to see her now?" I asked cutting her off, I know it was rude but I just couldn't find it in me to care at the moment.

She looked at me before nodding quickly "Yes, of course. Follow me. I'm going to explain what-"

'I couldn't focus on what she was saying; I would have to ask again later and see if they could explain.' Right now I was trying to keep a straight face which was turning out to be ridiculously hard for someone who had so much practice masking their feelings more than they would care to admit.

Noticing that they weren't headed to the room that she was accustomed to visit her Bubbe in she tried to memorize the way but it felt like a million halls; a maze that never ends with walls that bleed together. She can even tell where they made a right turn or a left. She stopped when she felt the nurse turn towards her and tried to focus on what she was saying.

"I'm sure you know that there's not really much we can do. She's refused treatment for so it's too late to start now. We've revived her twice but she is very weak and I am so sorry to say this but you probably only have this time to say goodbye."

My throat constricted and I nodded at her and took a deep breath through my nose, logically I knew this to be true but my heart wanted to ignore my mind and scream that it wasn't true and that she was going to be fine but I couldn't delude myself into believing something just because I wished it to be true .I knew this moment would happen I had been preparing myself for some time now, I had expected as much. She seemed to be getting weaker each time I visited and she was as stubborn as me saying if she was sick then she was sick and she was going to let that happen. She was happy living as long as she did and living through what she had.

Rachel's grandmother was a strong woman and a proud one. She had heard what chemo did and how bad it made you feel inside. When all was said and done you might have fought of the cancer and you might not have, it wasn't a guarantee.

So in the end she decided against treatment. Swallowing back the lump that seemed to have permanently lodged itself in my throat and trying to blink back the tears in my eyes, I twisted the door open and started to walk in. Only to be immediately shoved back out when machines started to beep and hiss and doctors and nurses came running. I stood shocked for a moment before trying to run into the room to see what was going on only to be pulled gently out by the nurse who had walked me there. The nurse closed the door lightly before turning to face me.

"Rachel I am so sorry I need you to wait in the Waiting Area, I promise to let you know anything as soon as I find out ok? Do you want me to walk you there?"

The little girl in me wanted to scream and cry and push the door open. I wanted to demand that they tell me what was wrong and why they were taking so long to fix her Bubbe, but the adult in her said that she had to be more like an adult. The adult in her knew that more often than not that wouldn't be of any use.

"Yes, no, I mean um, would you please show me the way?" She asked the nurse.

** 3rd Person:**

Sarah Puckerman's heart broke for the small girl in front of her. She realized that the girl probably didn't recognize her at the moment and she didn't blame her.

She had only bumped into the girl a few times. But from what she had heard from others and from Eliana, Sarah felt like she knew the girl and she felt for her.

She could see how the girl was trying so hard to keep it together but small chips of the wall that she built were falling and Sarah could see the small scared girl underneath.

**Rachel POV:**

I've been in this stupid waiting room for 15 minutes and still no news.

I lean back in my seat and lay my head on the white wall behind me and squeeze my eyes a movie, the memories play behind my eyes, mocking or comforting, right now I wasn't sure...

**_*Flashback*_**

_ "Add some more sugar Bubbula!" My grandmother said with a laugh, her brown eyes sparkling ._

_ "OK, ok, ok. Then, when were done with the Mandelbread my daddies will come home and have some right?" My six year old self asked. Bubbe's smile twisted from joyful to sad. _

_"My darling your fathers are traveling and won't be back for a while but I am here and you are here. We are together and this way we won't have to share our wonderful treat." Bubbe answered me in a soft caring voice. _

_Giggling I nodded. "Yeah Papa always tries to take my piece too! And- OH! But Bubbe what about Ana, can she have some?" _

_"Yes my darling we can invite your friend and her mother over later after Temple ok? Now let's hurry and finish up so we can get ready." She told me and took my small hand in hers to lead me into the kitchen. _

_In that moment I was happy and content. It didn't matter that my parents were not around because I had my Bubbe and that's all I needed. _

**_*End Flashback* _**

I took in a deep breath as more memories played out like a movie in my mind. Thankfully or sadly though, my trip down memory lane didn't last long.

" Rachel Berry?" A soft voice called out to me and my eyes flew open and I shot up from my seat.

Just by looking at the doctor I felt a ice-cold blanket fell upon me, and almost instinctively, I cleared my face of the convoluted emotions that were ripping my insides to shreds.

Clearing my throat and nodding a bit I spoke before they could tell me what I already knew.

"Could you please inform me where I need to go to sign the proper paperwork, please?"

Even to my own ears, my voice sounded dead and impassive, and in that moment, I resigned myself to the inevitable 360 my entire life was about to take

. Nurse Sarah stepped forward from behind the doctor who looked at me with sad and compassionate blue eyes. "Come on sweetie, I'll show you the way," she told me in a soft voice.

I nodded and followed her silently feeling myself shift into auto-pilot. I needed to be strong and get things done. I knew this would hit me hard eventually but for now there were things to be done.

**So? Whatta y'all think? I lotsa help from my Beta with my awful grammar so bless her heart for being able to shuffle threw my rough draft and produce something readable. Also a Huge thanks to JazMitch for giving me some much needed advice and feedback. I would love to know what ya'll think so please review! **

**Lotsa Love, Winter**

**p.S**

**Can anyone recommend a good fic or book series?**

**I recommend The Janet Evanovich Series it's brilliant and if you have read it then check out JazMitch's Fics there fantastic!(:**


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