Pokémon Fears and Insecurities

**Summary:** Grovyle struggles to fight through his nerves as he decides it's finally the day he loses his innocent to his boyfriend.

**Warning:** Modern AU! Slash – Grovyle/Dusknoir (PMD: Explorers of the Sky) Humanised, Fluff, and **Lemons**. **Don't like don't read.**

**Disclaimer:** Grovyle and Dusknoir do not belong to me.

**A/N:** Like I promised, the day I've finally written lemons has arrived! Hopefully this wasn't too…awkward? I'm not used to writing lemons. xD

Anyvay, enjoy you perverts! Feel free to leave a review. c:

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Grovyle's heart pounded with anticipation as he sat in the living room of Dusknoir's apartment. He could hear the ebony-haired male washing up the dirty plates and cutlery in the kitchen from their meal. The two had been dating for three months now, and while their relationship had been growing and blossoming, they hadn't gone very far in terms of sexual interaction. The lithe youth felt it was mainly down to his inexperience and petty fears of venturing into an intimate area he had never been in with another person. He loved Dusknoir dearly, and knew that when they finally did have sex the older man wouldn't hurt him. Despite this he still felt the fear and insecurities of becoming intimate with Dusknoir.

The teen had never been in a proper relationship before. Hell, he hadn't even realised his feelings for Dusknoir until Celebi interrogated him about it. As their relationship grew, so did Grovyle's feelings towards the older male. He was happy to spend as much time as possible with him, but on the occasions where their time together turned into heavy make-out sessions, Grovyle would always prematurely end it in fear of it growing into something else. Dusknoir was patient with him, and Grovyle was thankful for that, but it also worried him. What if he began to get annoyed and impatient with him? Would the ebony-head go elsewhere to fill his needs? His eyes widened at the thought.

He shook his head and sighed. It's not as if Grovyle _didn't_ want it. He wouldn't admit it to anyone else over his stubbornness, but he cared about Dusknoir more than anybody else in the world, and he _wanted_ to do this with him. He was a healthy, young man with the same sexual desires and needs just like anyone else. They were definitely stronger with his boyfriend in mind, but it was his uncertainty that stopped him from acting on his desires. He knew it was probably childish to worry whether he'd be good enough for Dusknoir seeing as he chose him over all of the girls who tried to sway him. Dammit, he hadn't _done_ this before. He had never been in this kind of situation before, so sue him if he was nervous and unsure of himself.

He sighed again before narrowing his eyes with a silent resolve. With more confidence than he felt, he called out his soon-to-be (hopefully) lover's name. Dusknoir immediately stopped whatever he was doing and stepped into the living room.

"Yes? What is it?" he asked curiously.

"I…" Grovyle's sentence died on his tongue and his heart began to race.

"Grovyle, what's wrong?" Dusknoir asked as he crouched down in front of the teen, concern clearly evident in his russet red eyes.

"I'm just…" he stuttered uncharacteristically before shaking his head. "It's nothing." _Coward._

"It doesn't sound like nothing to me. You can speak to me." Dusknoir assured him as he stroked the younger male's cheek.

"I know…" Grovyle took a deep breath and forced himself to continue. "I'm just…unsure and…I guess childishly scared."

"Whatever for?"

"I'm worried about being enough for you… It's stupid to worry about such a thing, but I can't help it. I haven't done this before, so I don't know if I'm making you happy or not." Grovyle raised his hand and placed it over the larger hand that was caressing his cheek. "I want to be with you, Dusknoir. I know that – I _feel_ that – but am I enough for you?"

He was surprised when Dusknoir leaned forward and placed a gentle kiss on his forehead. He felt his face warm up with the blush that stained it, travelling down his neck and body. When Dusknoir leaned back, he gave Grovyle a loving smile, the kind of smile he'd give him whenever the younger male began to doubt himself. It was the kind of smile that lit up Grovyle's world.

"I am happy to be with you, Grovyle." He said affectionately. "You obviously have no idea how happy you make me. I chose you for a reason, you idiot. You're perfect to me, understand? You are all I need."

Grovyle's chest swelled with affection and euphoria at the statement before blushing even more at the end of Dusknoir's small speech. He tried to stifle a laugh which caused the ebony-head to raise an eyebrow.

"That was so cheesy." He snickered.

"Well, pardon me for trying to make you feel better." Dusknoir replied feigning offence before grinning.

Grovyle grinned back and let out a content sigh as he rested his forehead against Dusknoir's. They stayed in those positions for a moment longer until Grovyle pulled back slightly so he could dip his head to claim the older male's lips. While the kiss was short and chaste, it was also warm and tender. When he pulled back, Dusknoir followed him and pushed him back onto the sofa as their lips connected again. That was all it took for passion and hunger to explode between them. Dusknoir deepened the kiss, rolling his tongue over Grovyle's causing him to moan into his mouth. That ignited a flame of arousal in Dusknoir as he straddled the younger male and ground their hips together, causing their clothed erections to graze against each other. Grovyle broke away from the kiss – the sound of moisture leaving moisture evident – and gasped like a fish out of water.

Warmth and desire coiled in his lower abdomen from the friction. It was like a war between nerves and arousal fighting inside of him, and he wanted the arousal to win so desperately. He wanted this, he _needed_ Dusknoir.

Said blacknette must have sensed something because he pulled back with a concerned look. "Are you sure about this, Grovyle?"

Grovyle knew he was sure about this, but he couldn't deny the shudder of apprehension that settled in his gut. The knowledge of knowing that Dusknoir would be penetrating him – fucking him until he couldn't think straight – scared and excited him.

"Y-yeah…" he managed to say. "But…can we go slowly?"

"Of course," Dusknoir smiled and kissed his cheek before realising where they were. "I know you said to take this slowly, but I'm worried if we don't go somewhere else our activities might happen here."

Grovyle laughed quietly. "Sure."

Dusknoir stood up and tugged Grovyle up with him, leading them into the bedroom. Dusknoir's bedroom was relatively large, and darkly coloured, but nicely so. His room was decorated rather sophisticatedly, and everything was in an organised manner. Dusknoir led Grovyle to the bed they often shared, gently pushing the teen down onto the soft mattress. They both ignore the springs' usual weak protest to their weight as Dusknoir crawls over Grovyle, hovering over the teen. Grovyle furrowed his eyebrows when Dusknoir doesn't move.

"If at any point you don't feel comfortable, I'll stop."

Grovyle couldn't stop the smile that forced its way onto his lips. He wrapped his arms around the back of Dusknoir's neck and pulled him down for a kiss. When Dusknoir pulled back they both were breathing heavily, and Grovyle's lips were swollen from the kiss. There was a noticeable blush that had formed over his face and down his neck. Dusknoir wanted to know how far it went.

He leaned down and began nibbling at Grovyle's neck, causing such a lovely shiver to travel down his spine. Slowly – almost hesitantly – Dusknoir slipped a hand underneath Grovyle's t-shirt, ever-so gently trailing his fingers up with ghost-like touches to his chest before lightly raking his fingernails back down. Grovyle gasped and arched into the touch. Dusknoir took the reaction as a positive and began to pull Grovyle's t-shirt up, preparing to take it off. Grovyle took a deep breath and let him, averting his eyes under Dusknoir's gaze. Dusknoir studied his body, taking in every little detail. There had been times when the two had seen each other's chests, but never long enough to study.

Dusknoir looked back up at Grovyle and smiled. Grovyle made an effort to smile back, but the look was slightly ruined by his flushed face. Dusknoir leaned down and took one of Grovyle's nipples in his mouth, rolling his tongue over the nub again and again. Grovyle couldn't help but let out a quiet moan as the older male continued his actions, he had never felt this kind of pleasure before. Dusknoir gave one last nip before moving over to the other nipple, giving that one the same amount of attention he had given the first.

By the time he was done Grovyle was breathing heavily. His golden yellow eyes were darkened and clouded with arousal as he looked up at Dusknoir longingly. It took all of Dusknoir's willpower to stop himself from stripping the teen of his jeans and underwear and penetrating him right there and then. Instead he settled for kissing his delicious boyfriend to slow his thoughts down.

Grovyle pulled away and tugged at Dusknoir's shirt. "D-Dusknoir…please…" he breathed heatedly.

Dusknoir grinned somewhat smugly and complied. He pulled the shirt over his head, shaking his hair free, and threw it carelessly on the floor. Grovyle gulped as he found his hands down hovering in the air hesitant to connect with the warm skin that was only a few centimetres away. He glanced up at the pair of red irises staring back down at him. While they were darkened like his with desire and a need of _more_, they were also showing worry. Grovyle gave a small smile, trying to assure Dusknoir that he was okay. He wanted this, he wanted Dusknoir. They had gotten this far. He wasn't about to chicken out now.

Slowly and shakily, Grovyle pressed his hands against the warmth of Dusknoir's chest. He was surprised by how warm it was despite how pale the blacknette's skin was. He traced his finger trips all over Dusknoir's chest and abdomen, mapping out his body, finding every scar, every mole, every detail. And Dusknoir let him. He let Grovyle have his fill, allowing the teen to grow more comfortable despite his obvious arousal. The green-head finally looked up and in a sudden moment of courage, moved his hand over one of Dusknoir's nipples and tweaked it in between his finger and thumb, causing tremors of pleasure to shoot around the older male's body.

Dusknoir claimed Grovyle's lips again and the younger male almost sighed. He shamelessly bucked into the hand that suddenly cupped his erection, and he couldn't ignore the pleasure and heat growing in his stomach. A moan of pleasure erupted from the back of his throat into Dusknoir's mouth as the ebony-head continued his ministrations. He could feel himself pulsing under the other's hand, and he knew he wouldn't last long at this rate.

"Grovyle," Dusknoir's voice was rough and deep, probably from being aroused. "Are you sure about this?"

He honestly wanted to laugh. "Y-you're asking me this _now_?"

Dusknoir smirked for a moment before giving the teen a serious look. "I told you if you feel uncomfortable at any time we can stop."

"I know." Grovyle whispered and squirmed, gasping when he caused slight friction against Dusknoir's hand. "I-I want this…"

"Only if you're sure,"

"I am."

Dusknoir nodded and began to unbuckle the belt on Grovyle's jeans. He took a deep breath and lifted his hips up, helping Dusknoir pull his jeans and underwear off. He didn't have time to dwell on his fears as he gasped when he felt the open air of the bedroom hit his erection, making it swell even more. Dusknoir's eyes widened at the sight of it, and felt a desperate need to touch it, to smell it, to taste it. He looked up at Grovyle for consent, and all Grovyle could do in his embarrassed state was nod. Dusknoir allowed his hands to travel up the teen's legs, gliding between his thighs before finally reaching his member. He gently took hold of it, and it throbbed in his hands. The more Dusknoir fondled with it, the more the heat in Grovyle's abdomen grew and the more a strange wetness formed in his eyes.

At last Dusknoir let go of Grovyle, letting him breathe for a moment as he began to strip off his trousers and underwear, revealing his own erected member. Grovyle could feel his face heat up at the sight of it. While he felt strangely embarrassed, he also felt a need to touch it, similar – if not identical – to the need Dusknoir felt moments ago. Once again Dusknoir was patient with him, and allowed Grovyle as much time as he needed. For a moment Grovyle was completely oblivious to what was going to happen, and then it hit him like a bucket of cold water. He _knew_ what happened between two men during sex, and he knew the first time always hurt at the beginning. That Arceus-damn fear was back, but he wouldn't let it stop him now. He had never gotten this far with Dusknoir without breaking and running away like an idiot. For what must have been the millionth time, he reminded himself that he wanted this.

He leaned forward and hesitantly wrapped his hands around Dusknoir's erection, surprising the ebony-haired male. It was warm and heavy in his hands, and he gently stroked it getting accustomed to the feel of it. He gathered his courage and quickly flicked his tongue along the top of Dusknoir's cock, tasting the pre-cum that was lightly dripping from it. Dusknoir groaned and finally pushed Grovyle back down onto the bed before blindly rummaging around in his bedside cabinet. Grovyle watched somewhat nervously as pale fingers pulled out a bottle of lube and a condom. He felt his heart begin to pound into overdrive; he knew what this meant.

"Relax, Grovyle." Dusknoir whispered against his cheek. "It won't hurt too much, I promise."

Grovyle nodded and believed Dusknoir's words. "I trust you…"

Dusknoir smiled again and opened the bottle before carefully pouring some of the lubricant onto his fingers. He reached down and gently massaged the muscles of Grovyle's entrance in a circular motion, causing said teen gasp. He had never been touched there before, and while he enjoyed it he had to force himself to calm down. He tried to calm his breathing as he felt Dusknoir's finger slowly pushed inside him. There was a slight burn as the finger moved deeper inside him before it paused.

"Are you okay?" Dusknoir asked him as Grovyle grew accustomed to feel of his finger inside of him.

"Y-yeah," he breathed, "keep going…"

Grovyle shuddered as the finger began moving inside him in a circular motion, and the more it moved the more the burn seemed to lessen. Dusknoir paused again and added another finger. Grovyle gritted his teeth and tried to ignore the slight pain that accompanied the burn. As Dusknoir moved his fingers to try and loosen the teen his other hand was on his cock, distracting Grovyle from the pain with pleasure. Grovyle threw his head back and let out a low moan when he felt an intense glow of arousal shoot around his body, and he knew Dusknoir had found his prostate. Soon Dusknoir's fingers felt no longer like an intrusion, but something that was filling Grovyle, and he couldn't help but roll his hips every time they moved.

Dusknoir knew Grovyle was ready and removed his fingers from his arse. He ripped open a condom and rolled it over his cock before adding a little more lube to it. He gently pushed Grovyle's legs up and said teen took the hint. His nerves came back with a vengeance as he bent his legs up to his chest. Dusknoir positioned himself between Grovyle's legs and looked up at him.

"Last call, Grovyle," Dusknoir murmured. "Are still sure?"

Grovyle nodded and forced himself to keep his eyes open.

He was sure about this. Dusknoir had promised him it wouldn't hurt too much, and any pain he was about to feel would be worth it. He wanted this just as badly as the ebony-head did, and he wasn't about to back out now. As he fought with his nerves he looked directly at Dusknoir and nodded again.

"I want this."

That was all the consent Dusknoir needed. He smiled before thrusting his hips forward, slowly entering him. Grovyle tried not to groan at the pain he was feeling as he took in Dusknoir's length inch by inch, feeling stretched beyond belief. He felt the man kiss his chest and run his fingers soothingly along his legs in an attempt to relax Grovyle and distract him from the pain. He took deep breaths and willed his body to relax instead of clenching around the intrusion, and found that the pain decreased ever-so-slightly.

Once Dusknoir's length was fully inside he stopped moving, allowing Grovyle to grow accustomed to the feeling. After a few minutes of Grovyle breathing heavily as he felt a hot throbbing in side of him, he felt as if he could handle movement. He opened his eyes – when had he closed them? – and looked at Dusknoir, telling him with his eyes that he was ready. Dusknoir leaned forward to kiss him lightly and pulled back until he was almost out of Grovyle before thrusting forward. Grovyle moaned as Dusknoir thrusted slowly gently inside of him. He was almost torn between pain and pleasure, but thankfully the pleasure seemed to be winning inside of him.

Grovyle wrapped his arms around the back of Dusknoir's neck and pulled him down for a chaste, heated kiss. Dusknoir's thrusts were beginning to pick up pace, hitting Grovyle's prostate over and over again. Grovyle couldn't think coherently, his thoughts were drowned and then jumbled up by the pleasure Dusknoir was giving him, and he loved every second of it. All of the nerves and fears and insecurities from earlier were gone, and in their place were pleasure and love. Grovyle fought to keep his eyes open as the arousal and heat coiled even more in his lower abdomen. He knew he wouldn't last much longer, especially with Dusknoir's hand tugging at his erection.

Dusknoir thrusted faster and harder, and Grovyle struggled to keep a hold of him as their bodies were slick with sweat. He couldn't keep his moans down as Dusknoir collided with his prostate harder than before. That combined with the pleasure of Dusknoir's hand jerking his cock sent Grovyle over the edge. He came in pulses and bit down on the ebony-head's shoulder to stop him from crying out. He clenched around the member inside of him and Dusknoir thrusted forward almost violently before coming, causing Grovyle to keen helplessly.

Grovyle could feel himself twitch as Dusknoir's softening cock slipping out of him. Dusknoir slipped the condom off and tied it up before throwing it into the bin conveniently placed near his bed. He collapsed down gracefully next to his young lover and held him in his arms. They were both breathing heavily as they fell hard from ecstasy. Grovyle shuffled closer to Dusknoir as he pulled the cover over them, trying to keep as much warmth as possible. Dusknoir kissed him on the lips gently before placing an equally loving kiss on his forehead.

"Are you okay?" he asked quietly.

Grovyle laughed. "Me? Yeah…it was nice." He murmured groggily. "What about you?"

"I'm feeling brilliant." Dusknoir grinned slyly. "I'm just worried about you being unable to walk tomorrow."

He laughed when Grovyle punched him slightly in the arm. "Well, I hope my bite leaves a mark on you tomorrow."

"I hope so too…" Dusknoir sighed contently and lowered his nose into Grovyle's hair.

Grovyle nuzzled his lover's neck feeling just as content before frowning.

"Dusknoir?"

"Mn?"

"Can I sleep here tonight?"

Dusknoir laughed at that, and Grovyle listened to the vibrations erupting from his throat. "Of course you can, you idiot."

Grovyle chuckled lightly. "Thank you, and Dusknoir?"

"Yes?"

"I love you."

Dusknoir kissed him again. "I love you too, Grovyle. Now go to sleep, I'm tired."

Grovyle smirked.

"Yes, Lord Dusknoir."

* * *

Finally…the deed is done…

I enjoyed writing this (in an embarrassed, perverted way I guess). This is the first time I've properly wrote something like this, so don't kill me if any parts seemed awkward. xD

Thanks for reading!

Dolan


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