Naruto 1. Chapter 1

Disclaimer: I do no own any manga or anime used within this story and I definitely do not own Naruto, because if I did that fucking Sharingan wouldn't be all fucking powerful. This will be the only disclaimer for the whole story. The end got a problem don't fucking read!

I also do not own any other reference I might make to movies or t.v. shows.

Also note all jutsu will be in Japanese and if you don't recognize the prominent ones then you really need to do your homework and stop watching the English fuck up of Naruto.


	2. Chapter 2

He finally saw it, Konohagakure no Sato, his birth place a village he had heard so much about but yet never seen in person. He was finally home, no more traveling and spending nights either in the woods or a hotel, but a real home somewhere he can come back to all the time and meet people and have friends and one day a family. Yes, this is what he had been waiting for his whole life, albeit his so far short life, but a life non the less. His name was Namikaze Uzumaki Naruto, son of Namikaze Minato Yondaime Hokage and Uzumaki Kushina-Hime of Uzushiogakure no Sato grand niece of Uzumaki Mito wife of Senju Hashirama Shodai Hokage. Yes, quite a lineage being related to almost every Hokage there has ever been. But there is also another secret that is even more hidden than even this one and that being he is the Third Jinchuuriki of the Kyuubi no Kitsune, not the first like most believe; that title belongs to Uzumaki Mito. Of course he knew all of this but was forbidden to tell anyone but the current Hokage and his Godfather, Godmother and sister (unless allowed by the Hokage) who were standing right next to him.

His godfather Jiraiya renowned author of Icha Icha Paradaisu adult novel series and affectionately nick named Ero-Sofu by Naruto. For the pass twelve years he has been Naruto's guardian and sensei. Besides him was his long time teammate and wife of eight years Senju Tsunade godmother of Naruto and nick named Tsunade-Sobo; with her apprentice Shizune who is Naruto's surrogate older sister figure and therefore called by Naruto Shizune-ane both also having a hand in Naruto's shinobi education and family with Jiraiya. There would normally be another member to this little family but she is currently out of sight due to complications but not forgotten and most definitely loved by all in this group especially by a certain blond hair blue eyed young teen.

The group is currently standing on a hill over looking Konoha as the sun was rising to start a brand new day each person and one pig ready to finally come home and get on with lives protecting this village. "Naruto!" said blond turned and looked at his sofu and replied in a bored tone "Yes."

"Now remember Naruto what we told you, no showing off and keep ninety-nine percent of your skills hidden unless you or a teammate is in danger understand." Jiraiya stated in a tone that left absolutely no argument. "Jeez Sofu, I know I know already, just because I'm blond does not make me stupid nor am I senile like you" Naruto replies with an all to familiar grin forming on his face as he watches Jiraiya clench his hands and starts to slowly walk over to Naruto to clobber him over the head. Now this would have worked if not for Tsunade already grabbing her otto by the back of his shirt and saying in that sweet voice all men learn to fear "Jiraiya act your age and not Naruto's or I will send you on a one way flight to sensei's office." Needless to say Jiraiya closed his mouth and lowered his hands so fast there was a two second after image.

"Hahahaha sofu you are so whipped" was Naruto's reply to the whole ordeal, but then in his mind he heard Asami's voice, in just a sweet a tone as Tsunade used on Jiraiya " Oh Naruto-koi, if you don't stop it I WILL kick your ass from here to Iwa, do I make myself clear!" Oh fuck he did it now " Yes, ma'am, I'll be good." The rest of the group heard his response and could only laugh at his plight as he hung his head in shame for being the one whipped. But then again he thought love does make you do stupid things and all men know they are whipped by their respective betters or in this case either their wife or girlfriend. But just to make sure Naruto didn't live it down in comes dear old sister Shizune, "Damn Naruto, now who's whipped?" That did it Naruto went to burry himself in the ground and the rest really did bust out laughing at him and one pig squealed. Oh how he loved his family and yet wanted to kick their asses at the same time.

After everyone calmed down they headed off again to the main gate to report directly to Sarutobi. Which is exactly what they did, they walked right pass the two Chuunin guards who desperately tried to stop them in order to do their job, I mean wouldn't you if you were newly promoted and all. (Take a guess to who our two buddies are, yeah they always get treated like shit huh?)

Sarutobi was puffing away on his pipe as always and reading a great piece of literature written by one of his most faithful and favorite students. He was just about to turn the page and get to a steamy hot sex scene with two women when the damn door opened. He tried as he might to hide the novel, but he was too slow when it came down to Tsunade entering first; she saw the orange, she knew what the novel was, she knew who wrote it and she knew who was about to be seeing our two favorite gate guards again in about 3.28967 seconds. Yup the moment Jiraiya walked in he felt it, the feeling in your stomach when you know your fucked and not in a way he wished to be fucked, oh no he saw the fist coming, saw it real well as it dug into his stomach and launched him out the window. Which Shizune happened to have opened while looked away innocently enough for someone to do a double take on how said here window got opened.

"Fucking Otto, serves him right, I know I told him to stop writing those damn books." A very agitated Tsunade yelled as she looked at her sensei, who was trying to jump out of the window himself unless he wants to join his student by the gates in just as much pain too. "Sensei, where do you think your going?" Sung a certain blond.

'Ohhhh fuck I am so boned, gotta think gotta think' was the phrase running through Sarutobi's head. 'Ahh ha, perfect, sorry Naruto gotta take one for the team, I'll pay him back later'. While thinking this Naruto couldn't help but look at him and feel as though his life was now in mortal danger and sure enough when he saw Sarutobi looking at him as if he was a piece of sacrificial meat. So Naruto being smart began hand signs for Shunshin no Jutsu, but at last no luck. For Sarutobi already opened his mouth and said the one thing Naruto didn't want Tsunade knowing, "It was a birthday gift from Naruto Tsunade and he even said which parts might interest me."

Faster than Naruto could currently move due to seals weighting him down and not to mention the KI now directed at him from not only Tsunade but also Shizune only one thought could go through his head 'Fuuuccccckkkkkkkkkkkk!'

Bam!

Once again the window was opened and Naruto went flying thanks in part to Tsunade Airways and landed right next to Jiraiya. Who in part turned to Naruto and said "Sensei told your Haha about you not only reading the novel but giving one to him." All Naruto could do was nod and plan Sarutobi's downfall with a prank so large it would make history. All Izumo and Kotetsu could do was watch and shake their heads.

Meanwhile back in the office and fuming Tsunade turned to her sensei and held her hand out curling her fingers in the give me gesture. All Sarutobi could do is hang his head and hand over his precious and then get sent flying out the window and landing with the other two. Bringing her fist back down Tsunade turned and looked at Shizune and said "No healing those three, I want them to remember this for a while." With a smile on her face, which was mirrored by Shizune as well, before both walked out of the office to collect the three stupid males they for some reason care about.

Back at the gates, just as Izumo and Kotetsu were about to help Naruto and Jiraiya back up in drops Sarutobi, right on top of Jiraiya; who in return let out a grunt of pain. "Thank you Jiraiya-kun for breaking my fall." Said Sarutobi as he stood up with help from the two gob smacked Chuunin after seeing their Kage being punished in such a way. "Ohhh Dai-Sofu" said Naruto to Sarutobi. Now this caused both Kotetsu and Izumo to drop their jaws, some kid just called their Hokage great grandfather and he didn't do a thing about it but turn and look at Naruto. "You know this means war right." Said a smiling Naruto.

All Sarutobi could do was gulp and pray Naruto ended it quick and didn't cause him too much embarrassment. Our to gate guarding friends didn't get what was so bad about a prank until they saw Sarutobi's face pale and a cold sweat start to drip from his face. "Now Naruto lets not get hasty here, I'm sure we can both discuses this like reasonable adults." Said a very, very frightened Kage. This only caused Naruto to smirk and start singing in a creepy tone that only the most crazy of people could love and feel akin to.

Deep in the Forest of Death, Anko sneezed, 'okay who the fuck is thinking about me, better not be Kakashi because he's still on my shit list from last time.'

Now back to Naruto and his demented song:

Ichi, Ni, I'm coming for you...

San, Shi, better lock your door...

Go, Roku, grab your kunai...

Shichi, Hachi, gonna stay up late…

Kyuu, Juu, never sleep again.

Before anyone knew it Sarutobi was gone and in his house activating every security seal there was plus more he was adding. Which only caused Jiraiya and Naruto to burst out in laughter and start to hyperventilate because of it.

The thoughts going through our two Chuunin's heads were as followed:

'What the fuck just happened' Kotetsu

'I've never seen Hokage-sama look so scared in my life" Izumo

This was what Tsunade and Shizune saw when they walked up to the gate. "Ummm what happened here and where is Sarutobi-sama and why are those two laughing like fools?" asked Shizune as she turned towards both guards. "Well you see, the boy, Naruto I believe Hokage-sama said his name was threatened a prank war, which in turn cause Hokage-sama to run away scared shitless." Said a confused Izumo. Realization struck both women who in turn also started to laugh like there was no tomorrow. Queue to very scared Chuunin inching away from the bunch of crazy and highly trained shinobi and a not so there in the head teen. (Remember they don't know how powerful Naruto is.)

"Naruto."

"Yes, Sobo?"

"You are allowed to prank sensei as long as he isn't too hurt and the village isn't destroyed understand, we are not having another problem like last time."

"Hey, I have you know it wasn't my fault the building collapsed because the designer forgot to fucking re-enforce the steel!" cried and very slighted Naruto.

"I don't care and watch your damn mouth around me, you know better, you are not a sailor. Just be happy no one got hurt." Said Tsunade.

"Oh fine, I'll listen."

"Good boy. Now Shizune lets go, I need a drink."

"Yes, Tsunade-oba." Shizune said as she walked away with Tsunade.

Izumo turned to Kotetsu and asked the million-ryu question "What the hell just happened?"

"I have no clue and honestly just want to forget it ever happened."

"Agreed."

Both never noticing how Jiraiya and Naruto disappeared and twin sets of giggles could be heard from a certain bathhouse not to far away. Inside Naruto's mind Asami could only watch through her loves eyes and take notes herself on different ways to one day please said teen, causing and slight nose bleed to form.

Please give feedback, and I mean constructive feed back. Not you suck ass and other shit like that cause you will be ignored and honestly I really don't want you reading my work then.


	3. Chapter 3

Next day we find Jiraiya and Tsunade in Sarutobi's office sitting down and discussing the current events, which namely means Naruto's situation within the village and whose team he will be on. "I'm sorry to tell you two but the teams have already been chosen for about six months now. I wish I could change them around but it's not like we make the teams up on the spot." Stated Sarutobi to his two remaining students, who both looked at each other and just grinned. This action confused their sensei to no end. "Care to explain what's so funny?"

"Oh, yeah well Naruto really doesn't need to be placed on a standard team, it would only slow him down and cause problems." Said Jiraiya, "I mean the only thing holding him back from advancing is experience and growth."

"Yeah, sensei Naruto is about Tokubetsu Jounin level in knowledge, and that's only because we didn't train him day in and day out but spent time making him a well rounded person not just a walking shinobi god." Spoke Tsunade

"Well in that case would either of you like to inform me of his over all skill level, and where is Naruto anyway shouldn't he be here?" question Sarutobi.

Jiraiya decided to field this question after looking towards Tsunade and getting to go ahead, "We decided to let him explore the village, I mean he has only ever heard about it from us and seen pictures, seeing and actually getting to SEE are two different things."

"Well when you say it that way, I guess your right; if he is going to be protecting this village he might as well know the layout and people to better serve it, but go on with his skills please Jiraiya."

"Ahhh, yes, as I was saying he is Tokubetsu Jounin level over all, with kage level chakra reserves, high Chuunin to low Jounin in both speed and chakra control. As we said only experience and body and brain growth hold him back, so by the time he is eighteen to twenty will he ever be considered a shinobi god; which at the rate he is growing will happen, I see him surpassing all of us." As Jiraiya was saying this Sarutobi could hear it in Jiraiya's voice and see it on his face how proud he was of Naruto for all he has accomplished in such a short time. "You say Tokubetsu Jounin, well what field does he show the most mastery over?" asked Sarutobi.

"That would be Fuuinjutsu and Ninjutsu sensei."

"Really now!" exclaimed an excited Sarutobi, I mean after all anyone with even the slightest skill in Fuuinjutsu was a gold mine since so few ever decided to try it out.

"Yeah and we would actually like him to if possible join the Interrogation and Torture Department." This time it was Tsunade who spoke and after she was done both Jiraiya and Tsunade could see the surprise all over their sensei's face. "Why would you want him to go into that field and not just continue to be with you two and go out on missions to better gain experience?" asked a very perplexed Saru (from now on it will just be Saru, cause spelling out his whole name is a pain and redundancy).

"Simple, out of everything we can teach that is one of the few things we couldn't seeing as we never really fought anyone other than the couple bandits and missing-nin, no need for interrogation with them." This of course came from Tsunade who decided to finally get into the conversation. "I mean not only will this help for his goal of becoming Hokage, it will also teach him about the human mind and make him sharper on the battle field to better lead missions, for with an understanding of the mind and what makes people tick can you truly win." Once again came the eloquent reply from Tsunade. "Not to mention with this he can stay in the village more and help with the spy network" Butted in Jiraiya wanting to once again be apart of this conversation.

"Okay, I understand the wanting to stay in the village and not worry about leaving right away and also the whole part about needing to learn more about the human mind and dirtier parts of our job; but where does your spy network come into this?"

"Well sensei it is very simple, since we can both summon toads, if he stay here and I go back out to check on my network once and a while I can just have to toads deliver to him the messages and then send them right to you with even less in between time. Not to mention you can also send him out on missions with the different Genin cells so he can interact with them at least a little bit."

"Well I must say you both make very, very good points and with that I agree, he will be put under the care of Mitarashi Anko and Morino Ibiki. Does this sit well with you both?"

"Couldn't have worked out better sensei, not enough about this, how have you been these pass thirteen years" asked Tsunade

"Well I was wondering…..

We now find ourselves with Naruto as he slowly walks around the village taking in all the sights and sounds his new home has to offer, home, that word was still so sweet to say and now that he finally had one. 'So, Asami what do you think I should go look at next, I've already been to Chichi's and Haha's graves and the memorial stone; should I go see the local shopping district or' but before he could finish his question his ears were assaulted from two hormonal teenage females.

"Back the hell off Ino, I'm going to give Sasuke-kun the lunch I made for him" yelled a very loud pink haired girl to the blond girl next to her, who Naruto could only assume was this Ino. "In your dreams Sakura, Sasuke-kun will be having my lunch and will be moved by it so much that he will ask me out and"

By this point in time Naruto had already drowned them out while starring with the old fashion deadpan looked that said could you be anymore annoying and loud, I think your disturbing the peace, "Couldn't agree with you more on that one Naruto-koi, hey I know why don't you go to the shinobi academy and see who you might be working with for the next part of your life and for the foreseeable future."

'What an excellent idea Asami, what would I do without you sometimes?'

"You mean besides have a dull and crappy life and not to mention the hottest girl as your girlfriend in the all known words, well I have no clue"

'Yeah, sure okay, aren't you being just a little conceded' Though Naruto.

"Nope and you know it!' Cheered an all to happy Asami

"Well okay, off to the shinobi academy it is then" With that Naruto bounded off in search of his future teammates, oh if only he knew what his Sofu and Sobo got him into, he would instead be running to the closest gate and out of the country, cause non of these young teens were going to be on his team.

With said future team. "Listen hear shit bag, I am going to ask you some very simple questions and I want answers." Said a grinning purple haired young woman as she pulled out a kunai and began to fling it into the air and catch it between her middle and ring finger repeatedly. "If I don't you god damn fucking cunt" spat the prisoner." If it was possible Anko's grin got larger, and if you could see behind the one-way glass you would see a large man shaking his head and the poor unknowing fool who just signed his own death certificate. "Seems Anko is going to be very happy for the next couple hours." Upon hearing the aged voice that held a hint of pity for the shinobi whom had incurred Anko's wrath, Ibiki turned to see Saru standing there with his hands neatly folded behind his back. "Hokage-same, to what do I owe the pleasure."

"AHHHHHHHHHHHH, no, please stop, make it stop."

Both men turned to see a snakes' mouth clamp down on said mans' well man hood. Subconsciously both covered themselves and paled ever so slightly. "I just came to inform you that you two will be getting a partner to train and mold for the next couple years." At that Ibiki nodded and was about to reply, but by some unknown force Anko had heard what was said and came flying out the room yelling "I get a new toy, really Hokage-sama, no joke?" Who once again had on her mega watt smile, but it was her eyes that told a different story. See Anko has always wanted a partner or someone to train to show she is trustworthy and can then become a full Jounin, and this was her chance. So with baited breath she waited for Saru to reply. "Yes Anko, you will be receiving a student, he will be under your care, but I would like you both to train him as you see fit in your respective field." Saru said with a small smile on his face after seeing how happy Anko was over receiving a student. He knew she would do just fine and should have had this honor a long time ago.

Back with Naruto just as he was entering the academy ground he paused and though he could hear Shinigami-sama laughing his ass off, all the while Karma-sama sat next to him and getting drunk while looking at Naruto's future. 'Why oh why do I get the feeling my life just went to Hell in a hand basket'

"Simple dear, it just did, although Hell isn't that bad" spoke once again a very amused Asami. 'Well pardon me, I am not the leader of Hell, that job belongs to you for the time being.'

"Well considering who you're dating and the way things work, one day you will be the ruler of Hell."

'That is not going to happen for a few more decades'

"Just reminding you dear."

'Yeah, yeah, now where was I, oh yes.'

With that Naruto walked into the grounds and went up to the main office to sign in and find out where the next graduating class was. "Excuse me miss could you tell me where this years graduating class is?" Peering over her morning paper the woman glimpsed at Naruto and then with a small smile said "Sure, class 325, go down the hall and take the stairs on the left and turn right when you reach the third floor."

"Thank you ma'am." So without future ado he took off to the stairs, "What a kind young man, wish all of them were like that and would stop staring at me like a piece of meat." As she went back to her morning paper "Oh, yay a new movie is coming out, wonder if the girls would like to go see it."

Upon reaching the third floor and heading to room 325 Naruto sees a note saying that the class is outside for the final test. 'Well damn perfect, now I get to see what everyone can actually do, this should be entertaining. I mean I don't think the instructors will be as hard as Ero-Sofu's and Tsunade-Sobo's, but still should provide some measure of their power.' So with that decided Naruto heads to the end of the hall where he saw a window and climbs out of it and begins his descent to the ground in search of the graduating class. After two minutes of walking around the building he sees a large group of not only young teens but also adults, so leisurely Naruto makes his way over there just in time to hear the sensei begin the final test.

"Okay class line up here and I will begin. First we will have you cover the three basic jutsu and as a reminder they're Henge no Jutsu, Kawarimi no jutsu, and Bunshin no Jutsu, followed by kunai and shuriken target throwing. Then finally the obstacle course just behind everyone." Said the still unknown instructor. Now Naruto isn't easily surprised but this really did throw him for one hell of a loop. 'That is it, that is all those, those, those ahhh, that's all my peers have to do in order to pass the academy and become Genin.' To make matters worst he turns to see the "obstacle course" and that did it, he stood there and just well stood there, trying to wrap his brain around it, around the obscurity of it all. He almost wanted to break down and cry or laugh so hard he did cry.

"Umm Iruka-sensei how many different parts must we pass in order to pass" asked the pink haired girl Sakura, if he remembered her name correctly asked apparently the sensei and man named Iruka. "Well Sakura as long as you can run the o-course in under fifteen minutes you pass." Iruka said with a smile, while many of the examinees let out sighs of relief. Now that right there did it, Naruto just dropped to the ground and shoved his hand into his mouth to keep from causing a commotion. As he takes another look at the o-course and what he sees does not impress. It was simply a five meter long set of monkey bars followed by a trench that you had to crawl under and then a twenty meter sprint, with the last but not least a wall rope climb. That was it, and they had fifteen minutes, fifteen, it shouldn't take them any more than five. By this time the most observant and ironically the most last student took notice of Naruto rolling around on the ground. So walking over he stops in front of Naruto and asks what's wrong. "Oh nothing really, just that this whole test is a joke if you really stop and think about it." Replies Naruto. "Oh where are my manners, the name is Uzumaki Naruto it is nice to meet you…"

"Nara Shikamaru, but just call me Shika, it is too much of a bother to keep saying my whole name. I also agree with you, but I happen to like the test just because it is simple and doesn't require a ton of effort on my part, just how I like it." Just by listening to how bored this Shika sounded about the whole test made Naruto laugh some more.

"What's so funny Uzumaki-san?"

"First just Naruto please, and it's just that you sound so bored, care to tell me why?"

"Simple I would rather be playing GO."

"You play Go?"

"Yes."

"Want to play sometime?"

"Sure, about the only fun thing to do besides cloud watching."

That's when Iruka decided to begin the test. Throughout the entire thing Naruto couldn't stop wondering how these people were even going to live pass their first mission?

"Sasuke you're up." Called out Iruka. At that just about every female screamed and yelled all about how he was the best. "Umm, Shika is he really that good?"

"Nope, and before you ask it is all because he is the last loyal Uchiha to Konoha."

"All fan girls. Glad Sobo isn't here or they would all be dead."

"Why?"

"She hates all fan girls. Says they give all Kunoichi a bad name."

"Ahhh." With that they both turned back around to watch as Sasuke finished the o-course in 10.45 minutes. More screams followed that announcement. "What the hell, that Hinata girl did better and they cheer for him so damn much, what a joke!" said a very agitated Naruto.

"Tell me about it, in their eyes he can do no wrong, it is so annoying." Said a bored Shika.

"That concludes the exam, please come back tomorrow to find out which team you're on." Yelled Iruka to get over the screeching little girls since only Hinata and the males were listening to him. "Well see you around Shika."

"Yeah see you around Naruto." With that they all separated and headed home to celebrate. Naruto had just left the academy grounds when Jiraiya strolled up next to him "So Naruto what did you think of the new Genin."

"Please don't, out of everyone there only the Hyuga, Akimichi, Nara, and Aburame really deserved to become shinobi and maybe the Inuzuka, if he would learn to not be so hot headed."

"Agreed, but what about the Uchiha?"

"What about him Ero-sofu, he is just a cocky brat who uses his name to get everything, ahh why did Itachi make us promise to watch out after him, fuck my life, just fuck it." Inside Naruto's mind Asami goes and says 'Naruto-koi that can and one day will be arranged, don't you worry and when we do I will be wearing….'

Jiraiya had notice Naruto spacing out and wondered what he was doing when he saw the blood and perverted giggle escape his mouth. "Asami told you something again didn't she?" Asked a very curious Jiraiya who had begun to pull out his notebook.

"Yup."

"Care to repeat?"

"Nope. Now who am I going to be stuck with for my team?"

"None of those kids that's for sure."

"Then who?"

"You will find out tomorrow, and trust me you're gonna have tons of fun."

"I have the feeling that I am going to want to kill you again."

"Have I ever let you down Naruto?"

"Where should I begin?"

"Shut up we are home."

"Oh fine, but I promise you, if it is some fucked up person, I am so pranking you." That caused Jiraiya to freeze and pale, since he knew Naruto could prank his ass and get Tsunade and Shizune in on it too, 'I hope he likes his team.'

Next chapter will show Naruto meeting his team and the first couple days of his tenure in I&T.

Also to those of you who are wondering Asami is Kyubi's name, hence why Naruto can talk to her in his mind. Also please pay careful attention to the words I use when I describe Naruto's power. Last for this little tib bit of information to how I think, when in a fight you finish it ASAP, as in you will notice that when I write a fight scen it will be fast brutal and to the point, sorry for those of you who like long fights with tons of jutsu. But in my mind that is not how it should go, ninja were silent killers and Naruto will take that lesson to heart.

Thanks to all that have reviewed and please keep it coming, I try to make my chapters somewhat funny. I hope I can keep pleasing you all. ^.^


	4. Chapter 4

The very next day we find our favorite blond (no not Jessica Simpson, damn people. Although Bay Watch was good) and his perverted teacher sitting or standing in Jiraiya's case in the back of classroom 325 waiting for everyone to take their seats and Iruka to start team assignments. Now why are they there when Naruto isn't on any of there teams, simple, just to fuck with the blond who has caused problems with his pranks in the pass and this was Jiraiya's way of paying him back. Just then Iruka and the Jounin instructors came in. "Okay class settle down…." No reaction from anyone besides Shika simply cause he was already asleep and Hinata because she is always calm, cool, collected and finally the Uchiha, who was thinking about all the training he would be getting to kill Itachi and so on and so on. Talk about a one-track mind. This of course caused all the present Jounin to chuckle at poor Iruka's expense. Cue the inhaling of breath and Iruka yelling, "Sit down now dammit!" Of course the Hokage decides to Shunshin no Jutsu in at that particular moment and of course right in front of Iruka getting an ear full. "I am so sorry Hokage-sama, I didn't know you were coming in today." Apologized a very, very embarrassed Iruka, hoping the Hokage wasn't in a bad mood and he found himself guarding the gate for the next three years. "No, I am sorry Iruka for just popping in without letting you know, but I would like to see my future Genin and also a certain something." At the end Saru let out a faint knowing grin as he looked towards the back to where Jiraiya and Naruto were standing and or sitting, just thinking of all the "fun" Naruto is going to have.

"Well, yes thank you Hokage-sama, as I was saying I am here to present the teams that you young teens will be spending your time on honing your skills and preparing to go on harder missions. I am proud to have once called you all my students and wish you the best of luck and hope to one-day call you equals. Now team one…team seven will be Uchiha Sasuke, Haruno Sakura, and Sai, under Jounin Hatake Kakashi. Team eight will be Inuzuka Kiba, Aburame Shino, and Hyuga Hinata under Jounin Yuhi Kurenai. Team nine is still in circulation" at that Kakashi shivers just thinking about Gai "Team ten will be Nara Shikamaru, Yamanaka Ino, Akimichi Choji under Jounin Sarutobi Asuma." At the end of Iruka's speech two different things happened which caused Naruto and Jiraiya and most of the assembled adults to twitch.

"Ha, now what Ino, Sasuke-kun is on my team and all you have is two lazy bums, I told you I was fated to be with Sasuke-kun its fate."

Off in a training ground resting after sparring with Gai-Sensei Neji sneezes. "Neji-kun do you have a cold, that is most un-youthful, we must fix this immediately. We will run 100 laps around the village and if by the end you are not feeling better I Gai will.." At this point Neji just ignores his eccentric sensei and ponders who is talking about him 'Who ever it is, is fated to lose to me no matter what.' Now back to classroom 325.

"Shut the hell up Sakura, I will take Sasuke-kun back from you and prove that I am fated to be with Sasuke-kun forever." Cue more sneezing from Neji and more laps added on by Gai.

"What did you fucking say you god damn pig?"

"You fucking heard me you flat chested bimbo!"

Now if every adult wasn't twitching before they were now. All the while Sasuke was thinking 'Must kill Itachi, must kill Itachi and anyone who gets in my way.' Yeah, homosexual much (I have personally nothing against homosexuality, just for purposes being that Sasuke wants to restore his clan, well you get it.)

"Ero-Sofu, how did those two imbeciles ever pass this academy and become Genin?"

"I have no clue and would you stop calling me that. I am a super pervert thank you very much." Jiraiya says in his boisterous voice.

"Fine then you are no longer Ero-Sofu" Jiraiya is about to smile at the thought of never hearing that name again when "you are now Dai Ero-Sofu." Says a grinning Naruto.

'Must not kill the kid, he will get his soon enough.'

During this whole time Iruka was trying to shrink away being embarrassed by his two former students in front of the Hokage. 'Why me, oh why me, now I can never live this down and will most definitely be put on gate duty, fuck me hard and get it over with. Wait when the hell did those two come in here, I recognize Jiraiya-Sama but who the hell is the kid?' But before Iruka could voice his thoughts said kid takes care of the little problem.

"Would you two both shut the fuck up now and sit down you good for nothing loud god damn hormonal bitches!" Oh yeah that got everyone's attention, including Anko and Ibiki who were waiting outside the door to come in when the Hokage announced them.

"Who the hell are you?" Screamed back Sakura and Ino at the same time.

"I am Uzu….."

"Naruto-kun, while I thank you for getting the attention of the class could you have done it in a different way?" asked a clearly amused Saru.

"Sorry Hokage-Jiji, they were just getting on my last nerves." 'Tell me about it Naruto-koi, ahh so much better my ears are very sensitive.'

"Sorry Asami-hime." Replied Naruto in his mind.

Outside the classroom "You know what Ibiki, I like him already, this will be fun." Said an all, and I mean all tooooo happy Anko, just thinking of all the fun she was going to have with her new toy. "Couldn't agree with you more Anko, I wonder how much "fun" he can have with our various guest hmm?" replied a grinning Ibiki.

"Ohhh, I can't wait to find out, I must remember to thank Hokage-Sama and Jiraiya-Sama and Tsunade-Sama again."

'Why do I get the feeling I've just been sentenced to death and someone is walking all over my grave as we speak?' Guess who. Up in heaven we once again find Shinigami-sama and Karma-Sama getting shit faced once more while looking down at Naruto. Just then Yami-Sama walks in and ask, "What's so funny?"

"Oh just fucking with Asami-chan's jailor, want to join in?" Slurred out Karma.

"Sure why not, I mean I owe it to Asami-chan for all that she has done to me over the years." Replied an all to eager Yami. So with that we return to Earth and find our two talked about beings shivering as if Shinigami-sama just walked all over them.

"Well Sakura-chan, Ino-chan this is Uzumaki Naruto a new Genin like yourselves who I asked to come here today so he can meet his new teammates. Also to meet the rest of you since it is very likely he will be going on missions sometimes as back up when he has nothing else to do here with his teammates."

"But Hokage-sama all the students have already been placed on teams, who is he going to be teamed up with?" Asked Sakura, while everyone else in the classroom had to agree with her logic. But before Saru could explain in walks Anko and Ibiki.

"That would be us, I am Morino Ibiki and this is Mitarashi Anko. Uzumaki Naruto we will be your teammates and we hope you come to enjoy yourself in our company." At this both interrogators smile at Naruto who could only stare in shock cause he has most definitely heard of these two people and was planning on exactly how to get revenge on a grinning Hokage and Sennin. 'Their deaths will be slow and painful. I am not complaining about Anko or Ibiki, this will be a great learning opportunity, but they could have told me last night, but no had to drag me here and make me wait and listen to two dumb little girls.' Both Jiraiya and Saru began to sweat seeing the calm expression on Naruto's face, I mean they thought he would exploded at them, but no, he was calm and cool and 'ohhhhhh fucking shit, he's smirking, why is he smirking?' thought both Saru and Jiraiya.

"Why does he get special attention and not Sasuke-kun, he deserves it?" Asked Ino. Sasuke would never admitted it but he was thankful that Ino asked this question so he wouldn't have to ruin his "cool demeanor" and ask himself 'I am an Uchiha after all, I shouldn't have to ask for a thing, it should all be given to me.'

"Simple blondie, the Uchiha doesn't interest us and no second rate shinobi like him could keep up." Answered Anko.

This got the whole classes attention, and caused three different reactions, Ino and Sakura were about to scream that this, this tramp didn't know what she was talking about and should bow down to Sasuke-kun. It should be noted that Sasuke was thinking the exact same thing. The other students couldn't help themselves but laugh at the Uchiha's expense and enjoy seeing him be put in his place. The adults groaned thinking about how now they were going to have to deal with Sasuke complaining to the elders and trying to once again get his way. Before anything else could be said, "Hey turd get down here so we can leave and get some real work done while these "shinobi" start their day." With that Naruto walks down to Anko and Ibiki as they all three Shunshin away, two with a cloud of smoke and one with a mini tornado. No one ever saw Jiraiya or Saru leave to prepare for the rest of their day and maybe the wrath of a certain blond haired, blue-eyed teen.

We now find ourselves in a bar across town where the three had just exited their respective Shunshin no Jutsu. "Bar keep two bottles of sake and for the brat…"

"I'll have a bottle of sake too, but warm please." Replied Naruto after Anko had stated hers and Ibiki's order. "So what do I owe the pleasure of having you two as my teammates?"

Ibiki decided to field this question as they took their seats in the back "Simple, your Sensei's and Hokage-sama decided that you were too valuable to get stuck doing meaningless chores and that we as in Anko and I could teach you some things. We already know that you have experience in human anatomy from training with Tsunade-sama, but that was in the field of healing. We will show you know how to use it, or shall I say Anko will show you how to use it in association with pain to get our enemies to divulge information. I on the other hand will teach you all about the inner workings of the human mind, which will come in handy on other missions. Do you see why now you are with us?"

"Well yes, and I also it has something to do with Ero-sofu too."

"Ahh perceptive, yes, since Jiraiya-sama has a spy network he often sends us people who could have information, with you he says the process will be sped up, care to explain how?"

"Kuchiyose no Jutsu." Such a simple statement, but one neither interrogator was expecting to hear, a teen this young already able to summon, how much chakra did he have? Then they remembered how he was after their debriefing from the Hokage. Smirking Anko replied, "So that's how he does it. I was right, you are gonna be a fun teammate and toy for me." Slightly disturbed but not showing it Naruto replies "I am glad to be of survive to you, also Anko you will find I am fun in many different ways and hold many surprises." Yeah he could so play her game and if the look on both their faces was anything to go by, he had just passed some hidden test.

"You should also know that while most of our work is done in the village sometimes we have to venture outside of it with other teams to collect the info if the target might be able to escape or if moving will just be too much of a troublesome ordeal." Ibiki states. Somewhere two Nara's sneeze and wonder who's talking about them. One simple goes back to sleep while listening to old people argue about how their little Uchiha was turned down for training that should have gone to him. While the other had to listen to Ino gripe about how he was being lazy again.

"That reminds me, Anko you can summon snakes correct?"

"Yes, what is it to you?"

"Mind helping me with a prank, you can join in too Ibiki?" Both adults looked at each other and Ibiki had to ask, "Prank who?"

"Simple, Ero-sofu and Hokage-jiji." Naruto's grin was contagious as both Ibiki and Anko shared it with him.

"So what's the plan brat?"

"Well Anko since you asked so nicely we are going to.." For three hours they planned and by the end of it Ibiki and Anko swore to never tick the teen off, he was cunning, merciless, and above all a fucking genius of the highest order and could give a strategist nightmares if his eighteen different scenario plan was anything to go by.

The next day we awake to find Jiraiya tied to a poll in the middle of town with all his notebooks laid out around him, If that wasn't bad enough he was dressed like a Geisha and had his face painted in a perverted smirk and a sign above him stating 'The Super Pervert Jiraiya. Famed Author and Still Famed Author of the Icha Icha Paradaisu Novels.' Now Jiraiya was not known as a legendary Shinobi for nothing and very little could scare him, but not in this case he was scared shitless. All because of a very few key facts: he was tied up and it was done very well, next he could not feel his chakra so there must be seals imbedded in the rope, next and above all else there were hundreds of women glaring at him with pure murder in their eyes and non other than his wife at the for front, "Dear, didn't I tell you to stop writing those novels when we got married?" once again in that overly sweet voice. "Now Tsunade dear I can explain." Whimpered a very scared Jiraiya.

"Save it, well have to thank Naruto for such a nice gift, won't we girls?" Nods, that was all Jiraiya saw before the first fist and after that nothing but pain. But in his head 'I will get you back Naruto and your little fox too, did I just see a nipple, oh yes it is a nipple, and look at that rack swaying back and forth.' Then he knew no more as he blacked out. After that Tsunade untied him and took him home to wait till he woke up to have a nice long chat. Above them on the roofs we see Ibiki, Anko, and Naruto laughing at Jiraiya's expense. "Brat, have I told you how much I am starting to like you?"

"No Anko, but it is nice to know. Now how long until Jiji loses it I wonder?"

Not five seconds later we hear a scream or terror from the Hokage tower. Followed by Katon- Karyuu Endan no Jutsu, followed by a stream of fire hitting the Hokage's office as said Hokage lands on the ground after his act is over. Then hearing his scream of "UZUMAKI NARUTO YOU WILL PAY FOR THIS!" Said here blond looked at both partners in crime and then vanished into a Shunshin to get away quickly an act copied by both Anko and Ibiki.

Now five minutes earlier we find Saru sitting behind his desk doing paper work when he hears the screams of Jiraiya 'poor Jiraiya guess Naruto got to him, too bad. Well at least I know I'm safe with all the extra seals I've set up, even if Naruto is better at them than me it would still take forever to get pass them all.' Oh how wrong he was. Cause just then his secretary walks in and gives him the first stack of many. He began his work for the day, but for some reason his first stack never seem to diminish no matter how fast he went, and then to his horror it started to multiply. 'Oh Kami-sama no, make it stop make it stop, why won't it stop?' Never noticing the seal placed on the bottom of the stack by Naruto who was snuck in when the secretary wasn't looking and placed it on his paper work. That's where we now find ourselves. Luckily for the Hokage his office is protected by seals so fire won't damage the main building, only all the paper work that was tampered with was destroyed.

Now back with the main character of this fiction, no not Sasuke, even if watching him get pounced on by five of his fan girls as they begin to undress him and attempt their little rape orgy, he is not the main character. I mean Naruto.

Yes, we find Naruto watching as Anko goes to work on a prisoner as Ibiki explains the subtle way Anko goes about her work. "Now Naruto see how even though Anko is using physical torture she is still playing with his mind?"

"Not really please explain."

"Well she is making small painful cuts by going for nerve clusters and staying away from vital organs. This way the prisoner will believe he still has a chance to survive and when we are done with him he will end up in a prison camp where he might have a chance to escape." Seeing as how he still had Naruto's attention and that he understood Ibiki went on, "Now sometimes this won't work and we get a smarter prisoner who can take the little game she is playing like this one. So she will move onto more drastic measures and more pain, each time reminding the prisoner that he had a chance and should of told us everything before she started breaking bones and cutting him deeper." He was interrupted as the prisoner screamed bloody murder after Anko decided to break his radial and ulna in three places. "Then when the prisoner decides to be forth coming with information Anko will continue to cause him pain." At this Naruto had to ask a question.

"Why would she do that if he is about to spill?"

"Simple, to make him think we don't really care anymore and that in the end we can get better information from a dead body than a living one, which will prolong his agony and therefore with the pain affecting his judgment and believing his life is already over everything will be spilled. No matter how much his training has taught him not to, it will all be forgotten in his pain-induced fog. See is has already started." Sure enough Naruto watch on as Anko did her thing and got all the information they had been needing, and with the prisoner backing up this one they had earlier interrogated it proved their information to be true and a job well done. "Ibiki you said that Anko likes the physical way, how about you?"

"I go for the mind, I cause what you could describe as mental pain. I find their every weakness and self doubt and then exploit it, that's not to say I won't use physical torture if needed, but I rarely do."

"What happens if you get a prisoner that neither of you can crack?"

"We send him to Yamanaka Inoichi to have his mind read." Said Anko as she walked into the viewing room cleaning her kunai from the blood after she had slit the prisoners throat. "Anyhow brat what did you think of my work?"

"I believe I have a lot to learn and will try my best not to let you both down."

After that declaration both Ibiki and Anko look at Naruto and nod in approval, so very few could stand their line of work and most tried to stay away from it, thinking it to be dirty, even if all could honestly answer it was a needed evil. "Good, then here is you homework." With that Ibiki hands Naruto a scroll full of human psychology books and books on different aspects of the mind and how it works with suggestions on how to break it. "You will have your clones start reading those while you are here with us taking notes and gaining some experience, which won't be for a couple more days at least." With that the three walked deeper into the building to get their next prisoner and teaching aid.

_**Two Weeks Later:**_

"In there is a Iwa Shinobi Naruto, we need you to get him to talk, use any mans necessary understand?"

"Yes Anko."

"Well then get to it, oh and you are being graded by myself, Ibiki, and Inoichi so don't screw up or I will unless my snakes again for your training."

Nodding his head as fast as possible Naruto turns around and composes himself before entering the room and making a hand sign before there was a poof of smoke and the door closed behind Naruto.

There was very little light in the room where the Iwa Shinobi was tied to a steel chair with seals all over the room not allowing his access to his chakra. He knew about Ibiki and Anko, hell he even knew about Inoichi what shinobi didn't hear of these three, so in his mind he was ready for anything. So when the door closed and the lights turned on he was ready, so lifting his head to get a good look at which of the three it was he almost had a heart attack; for standing in front of him in all his glory was a man many in Iwa thought dead and had cheered and partied when they heard of his demise. Standing before him was the Yondaime Hokage, Namikaze Minato. He wasn't the only shocked one, because Anko, Ibiki, and Inoichi were just as surprised, before it gave way to a ear splitting smile from Anko and a grin from Inoichi; but it was Ibiki who had the greatest reaction, it started small before he was in a full blown laugh, "Genius, fucking genius he doesn't even know a thing about the man besides ever Iwa-nin is afraid of the Yondaime, now let us see how he uses this fear?"

Back in the room the Iwa-nin was afraid until he remembered that the man in front of him couldn't be real and it was either a Genjutsu or a Henge, "Your not fucking real, give me a damn break everyone knows he's dead so give it up!" Screamed the man. He was so sure of himself until the "Yondaime" started to laugh, "You think I am dead, no, I am the most powerful Shinobi since the Sandaime and even he doesn't compare to I, here I will prove I am real." So deactivating the chakra seals in the room and untying the Iwa-nin the "Yondaime" backed up and gave an order, "Well release the Genjutsu if you truly believe it to be one."

Outside the room the three head interrogators were all wondering what Naruto was up to. If the Iwa-nin failed to release the Genjutsu then he would try to touch Naruto and see that it is indeed a Henge. "Dammit!" Exclaimed Ibiki, "What is he doing?"

"Calm down Ibiki, he's not stupid, let us see what he has planed I mean you two did teach him after all." Spoke Inoichi.

Once again in the room right after the Iwa-nin tried to release the Genjutsu, "Fine it's not Genjutsu, so it must be a Henge." With that the Iwa-nin placed his hand on the "Yondaime" but to shock and horror he was real, he could feel only bone and skin, everything right about a man his age and not someone else. With that "Yondaime" threw the man back into his seat and retied him. "Now we are going to have a nice conversation and you will answer me." Said a very calm Naruto.

"No, how, your not real I refuse to believe you're real!" Already the Iwa-nin was freaking out, I mean he was in the presence of a man who killed countless of his comrades and did it in less time than it took thousands of other Shinobi. So to hit his point home "Yondaime" held up his hand and smirked as a fully developed Rasengan appeared in his hand. "Not real am I, huh, well then I guess I'll have to prove it to you, so which arm shall I choose first?"

"Wwwwaaa, what?"

"Since you seem to be hard of hearing, I'll ask again which arm shall I destroy first?"

"Fuck you, choose which of my arms you want to destroy your damn self!"

"Oh, forgive me, I wasn't talking about you, I meant when I go to Iwagakure no Sato and kill all your family and friends, I need to know which arm I am going to take apart with my Rasengan here and beat them all to death with." "Yondaime" said in a way that left no room to doubt he wouldn't go through with his treat. "I mean I did already kill hundreds of your brethren before and here I want to finish the job. So won't you help me?"

By now to say the Iwa-nin wanted to run away screaming and never return would be an understatement. But before he voice his opinion the "Yondaime" turned around and said "Never mind you're no fun, guards take him away." The Iwa-nin didn't see the seals activate and he never noticed that he fell asleep; nor seeing the Henge disappear and Naruto standing there looking very proud.

The next thing the Iwa-nin knew he was back in his cell, but this time it looks like the idiots forgot to reactivate the seals. 'Yes, this is my chance just gotta wait till they serve me food, then I'll make a dash for it, gotta warn Iwa.' He couldn't tell how long it had been but eventually an ANBU showed up with his dinner and that was when he made his move, snapping the ANBU's neck when he probably thought the man was drained and couldn't move that fast due to having his chakra sealed. So taking the ANBU's clothing and making a run for it, e found himself outside and heading for the gates. He did notice that there weren't very many Konoha-nin around and that disturbed him, so increasing speed he ran towards home.

After a week of travel he finds himself back in Tsuchi no Kuni and only a couple hours from Iwagakure no Sato. But what he finds when he is only five miles out makes his heart stop, Konoha-nin all over the place and celebrating. Running into the village what he sees makes him stop and just stare, feeling numb and unable to do anything but stare and shake. His brain wouldn't allow him to process what was before him, but he could touch and feel everything, he tried to release this horrible Genjutsu and tried to wake himself, nothing worked, it was all real. Before him stood the "Yondaime" with a severed arm and blood, oh the blood it was everywhere not a single inch was clean on it.

"Oh, you made it did you, some dumb ass must have forgotten to activate the seals, but non the less it a moot point, as you can see. Also thanks to you for not choosing which arm I removed to beat to death everyone with, I decided to use both. It was really fun, I mean the looks on everyone's faces as I walked in here and started to kill everyone. It was wonderful and they all have you to thank for it, if only you had told me what I wanted to know then all this could have been avoided. Too bad, well your next so stand still and I'll try to not make it too painful." So walking up to the Iwa-nin and charging a Rasengan the "Yondaime" thrust it towards his left arm and the next thing the Iwa-nin knew was pain as he watch the "Yondaime" grab his discarded arm and slowly walk back to him, "Scream for me bitch."

Everyone else was wondering what was going on, Naruto was just watching the Iwa-nin after he passed out, then they saw the Shinobi shake before he woke up screaming about how his village was destroyed and it was the "Yondaime's" fault. That was before he noticed where he was, and still in front of him stood the "Yondaime".

"So little Iwa-nin like my preview to the destruction of your home?" The Iwa-in was so mortified that he couldn't answer, he didn't want to answer, he just wanted to go and hide, to never see day light again afraid of this man, no demon in front of him. He felt numb, his brain couldn't think straight, he just wanted to go back to his cell and never have to see this demon again.

Seeing this the "Yondaime" smirked and causally said, "You know if you just answer my questions you can go back to your nice cell and I will never bother you again." That did it, the Iwa-nin told the "Yondaime" everything, and I mean everything even his first crush.

After Naruto got everything he needed he deactivated the seals so the Iwa-nin could see whom he was talking to the whole time.

"You, you, you fucking bastard you tricked me."

Naruto couldn't help but laugh, and when he got it under control he replied, "Well of course you dumb ass, what do you think I am suppose to do, but I shall thank you and give you a quick death by your favorite jutsu." With that Naruto charged up a Rasengan and showed it to the now once again shaking Iwa-nin who spoke, "I thought it was all fake?"

"Oh it was, but you see my grandfather is Jiraiya, so he taught me the jutsu, have a nice time." With that he shoved the ball of energy into the Iwa-nin's stomach and proceeded to walk back to Anko, Ibiki, and Inoichi.

Once he walked out he was bombarded with questions.

"Whoa, okay, okay damn slow down."

"Kid how did you do all that, all we saw was him fall asleep and how did you keep you Henge up after he touched you?" Asked Ibiki.

"Simple, I used seals to make it where all the chakra he sent into my body was absorbed by the seal therefore allowing me to keep the Henge up, much like how Tsunade-sobo does."

This time Inoichi asked a question, "What did you show him?"

"I showed him the Yondaime standing in what was once Iwagakure no Sato with everyone dead, after the Yondaime tore off their arms and beat them to death with said appendages."

"You are a sick little fuck, and I have never bee more proud, when I have a kid I want him to be just like you." Cried Anko as she mock cried totally disturbing the other three males.

"So you three do I pass?"

"Are you kidding you aced this damn test, welcome to the club kid, we are going to have so much fun." Said Ibiki.

"Yay, drinking time, lets go." Stated Anko and she started to walk off to the closest bar being followed by the three males wondering what will happen next.

So that is chapter three and I am loving the reviews and questions I am receiving, which I will answer now.

Once again Asami is Kyuubi, since Kyuubi is only a title that states how many of something she has and in this case kyuu or nine.

Next this could become a harem, I have written this story out and at one point it splits into four different off shots, one being just Naruto x Asami, then Naruto x Asami x Hinata, Naruto x Asami x Shion or all four together. It can go either way; there will be a poll later on to decide.

There will be Sakura X Naruto, sorry, I have always liked NaruHina because the fit together so well, then the movie came out and I saw that Shion would also be a good pair. Kyuubi also works since I can basically make her any age or Naruto have extended life so she is also easily workable. I just think Sakura is too much of a bitch and should really grow up.

You might also notice that Naruto doesn't shy away from killing. This Naruto is smarter and uses logic, mostly utilitarianism, aka few for the many. Or to quote Spock " The needs of the many out weight the needs of the few or the one." So he will kill if he has too, but he will not be a crazed killer. That will be my next fan fiction.


	5. Chapter 5

It had been two weeks since Naruto pulled his pranks on both Saru and Jiraiya, which ended with an official truce being signed between all three parties. Everyone, well shinobi anyway wanted to know how it was done but Naruto was very tight lipped about the whole ordeal and refused to give up his secrets and just stated that it was all training. But many still couldn't grasp how one young teen could prank both a Legendary Shinobi such as Jiraiya and their Hokage and man know as the Kami no Shinobi. But they all just said that Naruto knew Jiraiya too well and that he found a simple way to get at the Hokage, but then again most of his own shinobi wouldn't try and attack him to the idea of screening his paper work was never brought up and so far never needed. Which was now changed, to where everything was inspected by a special seal Jiraiya designed.

But we now find ourselves in Saru's office with the three new Genin teams handing out their d-rank missions. But just as Saru was going to speak he heard a knock at his door, so saying enter in walks Naruto and Anko with a scroll in their hand; most likely from their latest interrogation.

"To what do I owe the pleasure Naruto, Anko?"

"Oh, just the latest information the brat here got after, well you know which mission it was from." Anko says not wanting to speak about their missions in front of these Genin, especially a certain Uchiha who saw her on the street one day and demanded she teach him what ever it was he was teaching the worthless commoner Naruto. "Very good you two, well you will both be paid accordingly, but please stay because later this I would like to talk with both of you."

"Very well Jiji." Naruto said as both him and Anko stood in a corner.

"Why are they still here and what was so important about the mission that they couldn't say it in front of us?" Spoke up Ino with Sakura agreeing, before adding, "Yeah, it can't be that important if Sasuke-kun wasn't apart of it, probably some stupid d-rank mission that you two failed." Yelled Sakura.

"Sakura, I am sure that what ever mission those two were on that there is a good reason that they can't talk to us about it." Spoke up Kakashi, knowing what job Anko had and therefore what Naruto would also be doing with both Anko and Ibiki.

"But Kakashi-sensei, Sasuke-kun was number one and therefore the best there is." Trying to argue with her very narrow sighted logic.

Looking towards Naruto and Anko, Saru just let out a sigh seeing them getting well in Anko's case a little kunai happy if the one twirling in her hand was anything to go on. "Anko please put the kunai away before someone gets hurt." Saru told Anko hoping she would calm down before two if his Genin got cut up.

"Yeah put it away before you hurt yourself stupid ass looking slut." Exclaimed Sakura. At this everyone in the room turned towards her. The Jounin, Hokage and Naruto looked at her as if she wished upon death. But tat did it, Anko was filled with rage, 'How dare that little pink hair wanna be fucking Kunoichi, oh she was going to love cutting her up real good.' But before she could move she felt a tag being placed on her back by Naruto freezing her in her tracks, so growling out, "Naruto let me go, I am going to maim her."

"Normally Anko I would agree but we can't go killing all the dumb asses in this village who have narrow sighted views about you and think that Sasuke over there is a super shinobi." Said a very calm Naruto, who went on to say, "Also Sakura, was it, I would suggest that you try not to get Anko her pissed off at you as I am sure your Jounin Sensei and the other sensei's can attest to my advice." At that all three Jounin Sensei's nodded their head. "Sakura, Anko is many things but a whore isn't one of them and trust me, any mission she goes on alone, the Uchiha would die faster than a snow ball in hell." Asuma spoke out.

All the other Genin where just standing there confused about the who situation and or in Shika's case just didn't care and wanted to get his mission and then go cloud watching for the rest of the day. But this time it was Ino who spoke up, "Then why is Naruto here, from the looks of it they went on the mission together, so are you saying that Naruto is better than Sasuke-kun?"

"You miss understand Ino, and I though you who know who Anko and Ibiki are from your father?" This time it was Kurenai who spoke up.

"I do, they are our villages interrogators like daddy."

"Then by that logic what do you think Naruto does?" Once again Kurenai asked.

"I guess interrogation."

"You are correct Ino, and one thing you need to know about this field is that sometimes they must leave the village and go to where the prisoner is being guarded. That is also the type of mission the two of them just came back from." Stated Saru, not only to Ino but also to everyone in the room. "Now for the reason why I have all three Genin teams here is because I would like to ask your Jounin Sensei's if they believe you're ready for a c-rank mission." At that all the Jounin Sensei's turned to each other and just had a silent conversation and then nodded at the same time.

Kakashi decided to speak up as the highest ranking Jounin there, "Yes, Hokage-sama we all believe we are ready for our first c-rank mission or missions."

"Very good, your team Kakashi and Asuma's team will be going to wave country with Tazuna here to Nami no Kuni to protect him till he reaches his home." At this he waved to the Chuunin guard who escorted Tazuna into the office. "So who is the team that is going to be protecting me?" Asked Tazuna, and at that both team seven and ten stepped forward. To say Tazuna was not happy was an understatement, "These children are going to be in charged of my protection?" He practically spat.

"Yes, we will be and trust me we are more than capable of defeating bandits and not to mention both Asuma and I are Jounin so you really have no worries." Kakashi said in his normal bored tone. During this whole thing Naruto and Anko were studying Tazuna and wondering why he thought he needed more protection, but left it at that till a later time knowing that with both Asuma and Kakashi could handle just about anything. With that Tazuna and teams seven and ten walked out after receiving their instructions.

"Now team eight, you will be heading of to Shiawasena Machi and take out a group of bandits that have been attacking the local villagers that is all the information they have given us, do you think you can handle it?"

Looking at her students Kurenai replies, "Yes, we are ready Hokage-sama."

"Good, I wish you good luck." With that team eight bows to Saru and walk out the door. "Now you two, what did you learn?"

"It seems the information Jiraiya sent with the information we received from the latest interrogation is that Orochimaru is indeed the leader of this new Otogakure no Sato." Anko said and when her ex-sensei's name was mention the amount of venom coming out of her mouth could make carbonized titanium melt.

"This is most disturbing and from what we have also gathered Danzo is in league with Orochimaru."

"So what are we going to do about it Jiji?"

"Right now, nothing Naruto we need more evidence on Danzo and Orochimaru, well if Jiraiya and get more information I will try to take him out when the time arises. I know Anko, that you want him dead and so do I, but we cannot rush this you now as well as I do that Orochimaru is too intelligent to not see through an open attack. Also with Danzo helping him, he will have even more warning."

Anko was not happy, but she did understand what the problem was and had to agree, "Very well, but I request that if you do launch an attack that I be apart of it please and if any other information comes to us that I be apart of it?"

"I will allow it, but only if you promise me that you keep a cool head, or I will have Naruto hear silence you with his tags." Saru says trying to lower the tension within the room. With that all three had to laugh at his slight joke. "You both may leave and keep up the good work." With that both interrogators Shunshined out of the room to meet up with Ibiki at the bar.

"Fucking little pink haired whore, next time I see her my snakes will be having a nice meal." Both Naruto and Ibiki look at each other and just shake their heads before Ibiki decides to say, "You know Anko that you can't hurt her, she is a fellow Konoha-nin and therefore we have rules."

"You don't think I don't know that, but damn she pisses me off and the damn stupid blond haired girl, damn blonds, no offense Naruto."

"None taken."

"The only female in that office who is anything of a Kunoichi was that Hyuga."

"You mean Hinata."

"Yes, wait how do you now here name Naruto?"

"I looked up every graduate's name and information to find out who I would maybe have to work with one day, remember I am an alternative if any of the others have to go about other business. But you know if you were to speak to Asuma and Kakashi, you could maybe get them to agree to allowing you to train both and I am sure Kurenai would gladly join you with Hinata in having a female training."

"Naruto I am so tempted to kiss you, you know that?"

"Once again Anko I thank you for your praises, but I think Ibiki would be jealous."

With that Ibiki spat out his sake and started coughing trying not to blush as well. The same was happening to Anko. "What the fuck Naruto."

"Well I mean, I see how you both look at each other, so why not?" Naruto stated with a shrug to accent it. Also watching how both Anko and Ibiki looked towards each other and then away quickly. 'When will those two finally get together, they do deserve each other, not to mention it would be one hell of a show for the next many years.' After they had all calmed down and gotten some more drinks in them Ibiki decides to ask a question, "So Naruto you know that in 4 months the bi-annual Chuunin exams are coming here correct?"

"Yes, what of it?"

"Are you going to try and take it?"

"No, not really, I know there is more than one way to become Chuunin, and plus I have no team members that are Genin; not to mention the fact that any team I am placed on will not really work due to the fact that we never worked together." At this both Anko and Ibiki nodded. "Besides it is way too much fun working with you two."

"I swear Naruto if you tell anyone this I will kill you and you know I could too, but I really do enjoy your company too and it is fun." Anko replied, not only with words but also with a kunai held to Naruto's pancreas to add extra notice about how she would kill him if he did speak.

While holding another kunai to Naruto Ibiki adds, "I also agree with Anko on both accounts."

"See this is why I said you two would make a great couple, and yes, yes, I know not a word, damn."

"Good!" Both replied in unison, only adding to Naruto's claim.

"Well guess I will be taking my leave then, I have training from Shizune-ane and Tsunade-sobo tomorrow." With that Naruto walked to the door but before he left turned and shouted to the rest of the bar, "Now Anko and Ibiki, don't stay up late and do things I wouldn't do, we have work tomorrow and we can't have Anko walking funny now can we Ibiki?" Silence, followed by massive KI directed at Naruto who only puffed out of existence giving away the fact he was only a clone. With that the bar turned to see two red-faced people.

"Ibiki?"

"Yes?"

"I call the lower half of his body when we skin him alive and hang him up in the middle of the village."

"Agreed." Both got up and proceeded to leave the bar at the same time, really not helping their situation in the less.

Outside Ibiki turns to Anko, "So see you tomorrow night for our date?"

"Yup, but damn wish Naruto wasn't so smart to see it, I wonder what gave it away?" She asked not expecting an answer. Then out of nowhere she heard Naruto's voice, "Simple, I didn't till now for sure. I mean there were little signs like you two coming in the morning at the same time or how you two smelled like each other and the list goes on, but thanks for confirming."

Looking up both Ibiki and Anko saw Naruto sitting on a roof once again with his one million mega-watt grin, that was before three snakes and two kunai shot out after him as he ran away.

"Damn brat, he tricked us, and you know what, I feel kind of proud that he is learning so well." To that Ibiki could only nod his head in agreement and add, "Yes, but it is also a pain in the ass for us, cause now there will be no denial, but hey I don't care, you're happy right?"

"Yes, so we won't kill him."

"No, only maim, so your idea still works."

"That's why I love you Ibiki, we have so much fun together this team, so when should we do it?"

"We'll give Naruto four days to prepare, and then we will strike."

Neither noticed the other Naruto clone listening in on their conversation smiling at how he is so gonna turn the tables around on them. Then poof, he was gone like dust in the wind. (Great song btw.)

With the real Naruto, 'When will they learn that I leave Kage Bunshins behind after all my pranks to see what people are going to plan to try and get me back, well then again good thing they don't.' Naruto mused as he read up on seals and other things he had to learn to be a good shinobi and be good in politics when older. 'Ahh the power of Kage Bunshin no Jutsu.' (Think the same way he said it as the ahh power of cheese.)

Three days later we find Naruto, Ibiki, and Anko in Saru's office. "Hokage-sama what is it you need of us?" Asked Ibiki, is two teammates and friends, the latter something you would be hard press to get him to admit.

"There is a little problem." Cue the looks from the three saying no duh. "It seems both of the Genin groups sent out earlier have ran into problems, and both will be in the need of your teams unique specialties. The first up is Naruto, you are to go back up Kurenai, it seems the bandit group is bigger than first thought and instead of sending a whole squad I am sending someone who can basically make an army. But also because I need you to gain other information, it seems these bandits are working for someone and I would like to know who, this will be your mission alone, even if you must stay after helping Kurenai's team; you may take as much time as you require and if you need back up send for as much as you believe you'll need."

"Understood."

"Next Ibiki and Anko, you will both go and back up Asuma's and Kakashi's group, they ran into Momochi Zabuza and his apprentice who is also about high Chuunin level. But that's not why I am sending you, Asuma and Kakashi can take care of them, it is Gato, the one employing them I want information on. We have long heard of him taking over companies and also doing what he is doing to Nami in other villages but with little to no proof. But because of already having a team I there we can intervene. I want you two to gather any and all information on Gato and then either bring him in or end him, understood?"

"Yes, Hokage-sama." Anko and Ibiki replied in unison like good Shinobi should.

"Then I will let you three go and prepare for your journeys."

While it took team eight two days to reach Shiawasena Machi, it only took Naruto one day with him stopping to rest, no need to arrive tired and be of no use. Upon arrival at the camp sight that team eight had set up he found that all four were expecting him, 'figures, they are a tracking team and I am not exactly trying to sneak up on them.'

"Hello, Kurenai-sensei."

"Hello, Naruto, am I to assume you are our back up?"

"Yes."

"That doesn't make sense, I sent back a report stating.." But before she could finish Naruto finished for her, "That there are approximately one hundred bandits, yes I know, hence why instead of sending a full squad he sent me. Just because I am working with Anko and Ibiki do not under estimate me."

At this Kiba being the more vocal of the group decided to try and assert his opinion, "What do you mean, you weren't put on a normal team what good can you do if you are being trained by interrogators?"

Deciding to give a small hint Naruto says, "Well that would be because I didn't need combat training like the rest of you." That got everyone thinking so Hinata decides to add her two cents, "So you are saying that you have more combat experience than us and therefore were just working on an area you were weak in."

"Correct, I have been trained by my grandparents and elder sister since the time I was five to fight and other things."

"Such as seals, given your demonstration in the office."

"That is correct Shino."

"Well that's good and all but what makes you so special were taking down one hundred bandits is easy, and note this is only an estimation, this is not a combat team." Kurenai states thinking that Saru has gone crazy sending one Genin to help her when a whole Chuunin squad would have been better.

"Well if you must know Kage Bunshin is a wonderful jutsu not to mention I have others that can help out too, but that is the main one for taking on large scale battles, were I have to worry about comrades."

He didn't want to mention his ability to summon toads and other jutsu that well let us say can cause great damage. Cause lets face it he was smart, he knew many jutsu and could use them, but most of the time they were meant for large areas and the others for close combat he didn't feel like showing right now. Besides he was a master with Kage Bunshin, he didn't need the hand seals for it anymore and knew how to use them.

"So Kurenai-sensei what information do you have?"

"First Naruto I would like to know how many Kage Bunshins you can make, I already know you can make them because it is a Jounin level move."

"Fine, Taju Kage Bunshin no Jutsu." In a giant puff of smoke over 400 Naruto's appeared shocking the whole of team eight.

"Naruto, can I use my Byakugan on you and see how much chakra you happen to have?"

"Yeah sure why not." With that Hinata activated her Byakugan and what she saw, well words couldn't describe it.

"Your chakra network is vast, it looks like someone approaching Kage level and not to mention you still have tons of chakra left in your body, just how many of these Kage Bunshins can you make?"

"Well last time I checked it was about 2,000." That did it; Kurenai fell to her butt not believing what she just heard.

"How the hell is that possible?" She asked as even her students were too shocked to say or ask anything themselves.

"I have a little extra help you could say, I will inform you latter Kurenai." Naruto did not feel like telling the rest of team eight he held Asami or in their knowledge Kyuubi within him. Also with that Naruto ordered his Bunshins to go set up a parameter with seals to alert them of any incoming enemy attacks. "Now, Kurenai-sensei, what do you know?"

"As I said before there are about one hundred bandits located five clicks due south, south-east of here in a camp. But there could be more, I called in for back up as soon as I determined that even one hundred was too much for my team and have held position here since trying to not get caught."

"Well then I will send out my Bunshins to do a search both in and outside the village in a Henge of course, while we stay here and prepare since my seals will alert us to anyone entering the area, is that okay with you?"

"Yes."

"Good." Just when Naruto thought it was over Kiba had to open his mouth, "Kurenai-sensei why are you listening to him, he is the same rank as the rest of us?"

This time Shino decided to answer, "That is simple Kiba, it is a most logical idea that puts us out of harms way and allows the job to get done faster without us expending unneeded energy."

"Correct Shino, it also means I can train you in water walking to help boost not only your chakra but also you chakra control."

With that Kurenai lead the team away to a stream that was located near her team's camp sight. While she would love to teach them Genjutsu several problems arose, one Shino and his Kikaichuu, next the fact that Hinata had the control but not the capacity and also the fact that most Hyuga didn't use it and preferred to fight head on since Genjutsu were worthless against them because of their Byakugan, and next was Kiba, he just wasn't cut out for it either not to mention like Hinata with Akamaru there Kiba had someone to always dispel the Genjutsu. 'I wonder if Naruto would like to learn some Genjutsu, he might have the control for some.' Kurenai wondered, and so she decided to ask, "Naruto, do you know any Genjutsu?"

"I know two, but they are a wide area effect Genjutsu, but I can dispel just about any if you're wondering."

"Really, well would you like some help with your Genjutsu so maybe you could become better with them?"

"Sure, why not it is always good to know more, even if I end up not being able to use them, at least I have the knowledge, and with that I can create seals to work the Genjutsu for me."

"Wait I thought you said you couldn't do any Genjutsu but two and those were area effect ones?"

"Sorry, misunderstanding, I alone cannot create but two area wide effect Genjutsu, but with my seals I can create Genjutsu just fine, but of course that takes time and planning and most of the time I use those for other things, unless I know of a target to hit in advance."

Kurenai nodded at this, it did make sense, but this could also come in handy, hey maybe he could help her make seals so that instead of wasting a lot of her chakra it would only require a little to activate a seal. So with that she decided to ask Naruto his opinion.

"Yes, I could, it would take time for me to do it, but it could be done." This made both Kurenai and Naruto smile. Kurenai because she could now become an even better Kunoichi, and for Naruto, he was once again able to help someone with his sealing knowledge showing once again the value of a good seal. Maybe later they would see the value of also mastering Ninjutsu and not just knowing them, not to mention knowing Ninjutsu, besides just clan oriented ones. With that they came to stream and after a little demonstration by Kurenai and Naruto who also gave some advice team eight was off learning to walk on water and also what it meant to be very wet. Naruto also sent off about 200 clones to work on his chakra control, with water walking combined with kunai balancing. Not to mention another one hundred to work on his kaze chakra in hopes of mastering that as well, because he knew how to use it, but since Naruto is a bit of a perfectionist and getting it beat into him at a young age the difference once again between knowing and mastering something.

We now find ourselves with Anko and Ibiki as they approached Tazuna's house and upon knocking on the door are greeted by two sets of kunai belong to Choji and Sai.

"Well, well, well what a nice welcoming present Kakashi and Asuma, but are you sure your brats know how to use those weapons?" Questioned an amused Anko.

"Anko, Ibiki, we weren't expecting you for another day, how did you get here so fast?"

To answer Asuma's, "We had a little help from one of Anko's snakes that happens to like swimming and was all but to glad to help, I mean it's not often that it gets to come out." Said Ibiki.

"Makes sense, I suppose, but where is Naruto your other teammate?" Asked Kakashi, but once again before anyone else could answer here comes, wait not Sakura or Ino but Sasuke himself, hold fuck he speaks!

"Tch, probably couldn't handle it and as a matter of fact why are you two even here, we don't need you I am plenty strong enough." Sasuke said with an air of confidence. (Read huge ass ego that was about to get busted in 3. 2. 1.)

"Sasuke, both Asuma and I called for help, you six are not ready yet to face either Zabuza or his apprentice, you all would only end up dying, also I am sure that Naruto could handle this mission along with Anko and Ibiki, but was not sent for another reason." With that the Uchiha got up and walked outside being followed by Ino and Sakura like the good dogs they were.

"Kakashi, Asuma when we get back I would like to propose a joint training day and one where I and Kurenai take the three girls and teach them, that way I can get it through those two little girls what it mans to be real Kunoichi."

Both men just looked at each other before nodding their heads to Anko in agreement with her idea.

"Well why don't we all go to the woods to do some chakra control practice, and this way we can also fill in Ibiki and Anko." With that the remaining people walked outside to see Ino and Sakura just staring at Sasuke while he brooded by a tree. 'This is going to be a long mission, I can already feel it.' Thought three males, well one added troublesome but you get the idea.

"Lets get going, we need to train if we are going to be able to protect Tazuna, because if Zabuza or his apprentice get pass us then you will have to guard Tazuna until we get back to you to re-enter the fight." So the teams walk into the forest a little ways away and come to a decent size clearing that Kakashi and Asuma decide are big enough with a nice pond in the middle.

"Okay, team ten you know what to do, out into the water." At this Kakashi turned and looked at Asuma and asked his question, "You have already taught them tree walking?"

"Yes, I did it during our first week of practice, don't tell e you haven't taught it to them yet?"

"Well no, I had them working on team building exercises, which as you can tell they really do need, and besides I know the Uchiha library has chakra control scrolls, add in the fact that as we both know Sai has received training from Danzo; I also know that Sakura hangs out with Ino so I figured they also trained together since she never came to me for help." They were all thinking it, but it was Anko who voiced it loud enough for everyone to hear, "Kakashi you dip shit, do you really think that dumb ass Uchiha", said here Uchiha glares at her plus Ino and Sakura but Anko just brushes it off, "would really train in chakra control, he's too stupid to understand the need for it; knowing that arrogant ass he believes the only two things he needs is his damn Sharingan, which he hasn't unlocked yet and a bunch of powerful Ninjutsu. Plus the pink haired bimbo training, yeah right she probably only trains when you make her, look at her she has no muscle on her damn body besides what she was born with, both her and the blond haired one probably barely eat a damn thing!"

"Hey I will have you know that I eat a ton, one bowl of rice a day and a little salad." Replied Ino with Sakura nodding. Both thinking that this would make Anko happy, oh how wrong they were.

"See point, and case closed, two stupid wanna be Kunoichi that think their figures and some boy will come in and save the day." Turning away from Kakashi and Asuma who both had the decency to look ashamed now yells at the two young teens, "As for you two dumb little fucks, the Uchiha isn't all powerful and I would bet all my money that the Nara over there could bet him in any match with his brains alone because brains are far more important than brawn; also not to fucking consider that you two need to eat, if you were to fucking train you would burn off all the fat you put on and put the energy to good use making muscle."

"But Sasuke-kun is way more powerful than Shikamaru and why do we want to put on muscle, everyone knows that men like slim, skinny women."

"Once again you two are fucking stupid and I refuse to listen to your shit, I cannot wait till we return to the village. Kakashi, Asuma have fun teaching them."

With that both Anko and Ibiki walked away to prepare for their own duties, that being right now recon and then the capture of Gato.

Later that night at team eights campsite everyone was tired, well besides Naruto and Kurenai, after all Kurenai was a Jounin and well Naruto was Naruto case in point. After watching Naruto all day with her Sensei Hinata decided to go speak with Naruto about a little project she was hoping he could help her with. So walking over to him she decided to make herself known, "Naruto-san are you busy?"

"No, and you do not have to be so formal with me, and what can I help you with?"

"Then may I call you Naruto?"

"Yes, may I call you Hinata?"

"Yes. Now if I may ask a question?"

"You mean besides the one you have already asked, yes go ahead I am all ears." To make his point known Naruto turned to face her completely and tapped the space next to him on his log for her to sit.

"I noticed earlier that you are quite proficient in seals, and I was wondering if you could help me with a little project I have been working on?"

"I will help in anyway I can, what is your problem?" With that Hinata goes into the story about how her clan is divided in two and what the seal does and how it works, being the heiress to the Hyuga clan allows her to know these things. "So you want me to design a seal that will not only protect the blood line but without the slave like properties it takes on when used the way it is. It is possible, it will take time because I would like to get this right and enable your dream to come true, which I must say you are very different from the normal Hyuga, but it is also refreshing."

"Thank you Naruto, all I ask is that you try."

"No thank you, I enjoy a good challenge and this will be excellent, but if you don't mind stay and chat for a while, I enjoy your company, could I interest you in some tea?" After Naruto asked this he pulls out a scroll and places it on the ground and out pops a tea set. Hinata deciding that Naruto was good company and it would be nice to talk with someone intelligent, not saying Shino wasn't but he just didn't talk, and Kiba had his moments, but far and in between.

"Sure Naruto that sounds nice." Says a smiling Hinata.

Back with Kakashi and Asuma's teams everyone was heading to bed tired, sore and in one persons case pissed.

"How dare they make fun of me, an Uchiha! If that wasn't bad enough they make me do this lame chakra control exercise when I should be learning powerful Ninjutsu to kill HIM. Fucking retards, I will make you pay if it's the last thing I do. Yes that will do just nicely; I wonder how they will feel after I unlock my Sharingan and the show them how to really use Ninjutsu. After that I think I will have that Anko woman bow down before me and then I will take her, she should provide powerful offspring and it will show her, her place, below me.' Deranged much?

Hope everyone is enjoying my chapters so far? If anyone has noticed they are indeed getting longer, but that is because with more happening and more character interaction there will be more dialog. I do not like stories where there is little talking or if it is all over the place that you cannot follow it. I am also writing much like you would see in a play, each chapter is like a scene or maybe two that encompasses one thought or topic per chapter, this way it is easy to follow. Lastly I am also starting to slowly introduce Naruto to multiple characters within the story. Well once again hope you like it and give me reviews please, and do not worry I might talk about your reviews but I have a policy of never telling people whom the review comes from if I ever post it within one of my chapters. ^.^


	6. Chapter 6

After two days of recon Naruto had determined that there was indeed only one bandit camp, which in truth kind of put him off, he was hoping for a little bit more of a challenge it wasn't arrogance speaking, it was just the fact that he had taken out bandit camps almost four times this size before when Jiraiya and Tsunade would send him in alone for practice. Freaking practice, but then again he was allowed to use everything he had, which always made life easier, but then again he never needed everything. Just a little planning and confusion on the bandit's part usually made his life simple.

"Okay everyone come here so we can plan." Kurenai ordered and since she was the highest-ranking shinobi there Naruto was under her command, which he really didn't mind at all. "As we know, thanks to Naruto, there are only one hundred bandits that we have to eliminate for this mission to be a success. This will not be easy, even if you are trained shinobi they have the numbers, well at least they use to; so with that we are going to have to still play it smart."

During the whole explanation Shino, Kiba, and Hinata were getting nervous, sure they were good and could fight and win but that wasn't what was bothering them, they had to kill, take another life. Even Shino with his logic was having a hard time trying to grasp what he was about to do, even with Hinata's cold exterior anyone that knew her knew that she was still a kind and caring person. Kiba was also had problems he knew he would have to kill but the odds were he would do it by accident with his claws, something he was thankful for because since most of his jutsu or at least the ones he knew required him to spin he wouldn't see his targets face.

Naruto on the other hand was thinking of what he was allowed to do with his in placed restrictions unless they came under heavy attack and were in mortal danger, something that one hundred bandits couldn't ever cause. 'I think I'll just stick with my kunai wire seal trick, yeah that and Kage Bunshin will take care of all my problems.'

"I would like it Naruto if you could set up Kage Bunshins outside the parameter so if any bandits try to run they won't get far. Then send in a swarm of Kage Bunshins to distract the bandits while we follow behind to do our jobs too." A simple plan, but one that would work in this situation, no need to make too complicated a plan since sometimes simple was the best policy. Plus Kurenai knew that Kage Bunshin were easy to destroy, only one hit anywhere would take them out, so she couldn't rely on them.

"Also we'll try to take the bandit leader alive so that way we can return him to the village to be interrogated for more information." She completely forgot who was standing not five feet from her. With that Naruto had to smirk and decided he would remind her later after the real danger was out of sight.

"Okay, we move out in ten minutes, make sure you have everything and Naruto please send out your clones." With that all the Genin gave their nods and got to work.

"Kage Bunshin no Jutsu, okay I want 400 of you to spread out and create a parameter up to .25 clicks out, you are to eliminate any and all bandits that make a run for it. The last 100 are to charge the bandit camp when we are ready." After his orders were given the 400 clones shot off to the trees to prepare their traps. While Naruto was doing this Kiba, Shino, and Hinata check all their supplies and prepare them selves mentally to get the job done and to go home, but there was still doubt in their eyes, Kurenai say this and decided to say something about it, hoping it would help.

"Pay attention you three." This got their attention and Naruto's who just looked up at her wondering what more she had to say.

"I know this is going to be hard, you must kill I know you are still young and taking human life is always hard. But you must remember these people are thieves, rapist, and murders they are the scum of humanity. They will not hesitate to kill you and because of this you must not hesitate to kill them, you must turn off your heart and kill. Afterwards you can then and only then feel guilt, but remember they are the worst, no matter if we kill them here today or take them back to Konoha, they will die. After this is over I will be glad to help you in anyway I can, but you must do this because they will kill you, that is if you're lucky, Hinata this is mostly for you and I. So go out there and fight with everything you got."

The affect was immediate, Kiba, Shino, and Hinata each lost their doubts and got ready to do their job, each coming to terms with not only having to kill but understanding why they had to, they weren't going to like it, but they would do it for the betterment of their country. Naruto just looked on and gave a slight nod of his head to Kurenai, remembering his first kills and what Jiraiya and Tsunade told him and how Shizune talked with him afterwards. With that their ten minutes were up.

"Naruto please proceed." Her response was the 101 Naruto's launching kunai towards the bandit camp it a grid like pattern followed by their charge.

Naruto reached the first bandit who was just starting to get his bearings after seeing multiple blonds, who were the same kid charging their camp and seeing his fellow bandits getting nailed by kunai which came from nowhere. He never had a chance because Naruto used that one second to slit his throat and move on. His clones doing much of the same thing, not giving the enemy a second to recover and trying to remove as many as possible as quickly as possible. He was ruthless and cold, if anyone were to look at his eyes they would be shocked, the normal warm blue color with a spark of life was gone. In place were cold calculating eyes devoid of all life and if the need arise would take the life of young or old, woman or man, it didn't matter. All before him would fall; the only saving grace to the bandits was their quick death.

Kiba was having very little trouble with his group of bandits. Between him and Akamaru both using Gatsuuga and ripping apart their opponents. It also had an added affect, since they were spinning so fast the blood was being flung off, so when all this was over the added shock of being covered in blood wouldn't set in.

Shrugging Naruto moved onto the next group whom by now had recovered from the initial shock and were finally fighting back, not that it mattered much to him their fastest running was like watching the baby crawl with an extra 200 pounds attached to them. Yeah, just really slow, but he didn't care they were as good as dead, so with that he pulled out a two kunai and threw them. But instead of aiming at any of the bandits both went wide going left and right respectively. But what the bandits couldn't see was a thin, very thin steel wire tided between the two and with that the wire wrapped around all six bandits and before any could make a come back about how it wouldn't hold them the two kunai turned into two Kage Bunshin who then pulled on the wire tearing through the bandits and ending their lives. With the deed finished all three Naruto's moved off to keep up the good work.

We find ourselves with Hinata, who like Kiba was doing extremely well considering the fact she has never had to kill before. The only difference is that like Shino on the other side of the clearing her strikes left no visible mark, they just fell to the ground either dead or much like Kiba disabled, even the one trying to sneak up on her fell quickly.

The last two to die were from Kurenai casting a Genjutsu allowing her to sneak up behind them and slit their throats.

"Alright team good job, Naruto could you get your clones to round up the living bandits so we can take them to Konoha."

"Sensei why would we take them to Konoha?"

"Good question Kiba and a simple answer, to be interrogated for information."

"Why do we need to interrogate them Sensei?"

This time Naruto decided to answer, well at least one of his near by clones did, "That way Shino we can find out who they work for, and where they deliver their spoils, this way we can stop the bandits once and for all because without money they won't do a thing, also Kurenai-sensei do you forget who I work with?"

"Isn't it Anko and Ibiki?"

"Now, what are they known for and because of that what do you think I have been learning to do?"

"Interrogation." Kurenai says sounding like it should have been the most obvious thing in the world.

"Wait you're an interrogator, doesn't that bother you, I mean you are breaking people for information and then what kill them when they either tell you or don't tell you things." Exclaims Kiba, while Hinata and Shino look on both equally shocked.

"Yes, Kiba I'm an interrogator, but you have to understand what is the most important tool a Shinobi or anyone in power can have?"

"I don't really know, I always thought a strong army and lots of fire power."

"Well yes, Kiba, but information is key, with information you can plan and make strategies with effective tactics without wasting man power and know exactly where to hit. Without it you could attack a base that was abandoned three months ago and just wasted all that time and then what have another regimen come and attack you while you're weak."

All three Genin on Kurenai's team nodded to the pure logic and saw that the statement held true. While Kurenai just thought, 'He is very smart and has the power, with a little bit more training he would make an excellent Chuunin, Anko and Ibiki sure are doing a good job.'

"Now if you'll excuse me I have a job to do with the bandits left alive."

"What do you mean Naruto?" Asked Hinata, Kurenai already had a good idea.

"Oh, you know, gotta ask them some questions."

"If they don't answer?" Asked Kiba, while Shino looked on also wondering the same thing.

"Why I will make them answer." Said Naruto as he returned to the clearing after the clone originally talking to the group dispelled. Now what got everyone in the clearing was the sound of Naruto's voice, it was almost as if he was hoping they wouldn't answer him. 'Anko must be rubbing off on him.' Thought Kurenai, but little did she know that it was just Naruto's naturally sadistic side showing. So with that team eight and Kurenai followed Naruto to the six remaining bandits who were all tied up.

"So you guys stand back and please don't interrupt."

So as Naruto asked all of team eight stood off to the side as the Naruto clones behind each of the bandits pulled off their blindfolds. All six looked up and when they saw Naruto all but one started to tremble but it was one that decided to test Naruto.

"So they send some punk ass stupid fucking kid to do a damn mans job, what the hell is this, please why don't you run along and go home and play you little cunt." After his rant the other five started to get their bearings again and were also throwing around insults. So Naruto finally getting tired of his pointless bitching decided to smack him in his right cheek.

"Now that your pointless bitching is over and done with I can now start asking you some questions and please do answer them for it will make all our lives easier."

"Go fuck yourself!" Yelled the indigent bandit from before, becoming pissed at being slapped around by some child.

"I'd rather not fuck myself, but I can tell you right now that if you don't start answering my questions you will be fucked, and trust me not in the way you want to be." Naruto said as he signaled his clones to tie ropes to all the bandits' limbs and toss the other ends over the tree branches.

"Kurenai-sensei, I am confused, why hasn't Naruto taken more extreme measures after being cursed at like that?" Asked Shino, who was confused thinking someone not of his or the Hyuga's clan would become illogical.

"I do not know, but if I had to guess the ropes being tied to them will answer your question." Although Kurenai was starting to think that maybe she shouldn't allow her students to see this, they were too new and had just got done making their first kills, adding this would only make things worst. But she stopped herself and thought that it might as well happen now and believing that because it was someone their own age they would be able to cope with it better.

"Well it seems you six need some lessons in mannerism, something I can easily help you with." After saying this Naruto walked up to all six and put seals on their heads and then took a step back signaling his clones as he did. Once the clones got the signal they began to pull on their respective ropes causing the bandits' to at first rise up into the air. But the ropes tied to their legs went taunt the continued pulling then caused their legs and arms to be pulled to the point of them almost being dislocated. But Naruto didn't want that, no, he needed to do this nice and slow so that way he had plenty of body parts to attack. I mean he had to make sure he had all their information.

"Now, whom do you work for?" All he got in response was spit at his feet.

"Okay, well I guess then before we begin, I must thank you for being excellent exhibits for my teammates, as well as test subjects I've always wanted to try this." So making a hand sign the seals Naruto placed on the bandits glowed and then nothing else seemed to happen. Everyone stood there or in the bandit's case hung there confused but Naruto didn't even care as he created more clones.

Each clone walked up behind a bandit and preceded to take the bandit's shoes and if they were wearing them gloves off. "Last chance to tell me whom you work for and where." Once again spit was his answer and one even was able to give him the finger, but no words came out of their mouths, not because of the seals but because of not wanting to accidentally slip up and give him the answer. 'Who said no honor among thieves or in this case bandits, this shall prove to be fun.'

While Naruto was thinking this Asami was on a completely different thought pattern. 'Damn Naruto you know when you turn all sadistic and dark I get turned on and there is nothing you can do about it and I am oh so tired of pleasuring myself.'

There was no verbal response from Naruto only each of his clones breaking each bandits small toes, electing screams from each bandit and making all the Genin besides Naruto cringe. But it wasn't over, no not by a long shot.

"All you have to do is tell me whom it is you work for and I will stop, but if you don't well…" to complete his statement each clone made a small slit in the bandit's legs and poured a clear liquid over the cut. Which only caused more screams. "I will keep this up."

"Kurenai-sensei is this really what interrogation is all about?"

"Yes, Shino, this is one way to gather information." Team eight watched on as Naruto continued to work.

"Kurenai-sensei is correct this is only ONE way to gather information, Anko likes to use pain and Ibiki likes to use psychological attacks, but either way we can and will get any and all answers." Said another Naruto clone.

"Which way do you prefer?" Asked Shino wishing to gain more insight into how Naruto thinks and works.

"I happen to like a combination of both, but sometimes I only use one when it is needed no need to complicate things."

"That is logical."

Their questions where cute off as one of the bandits had it after Naruto began pulling back his finger nails and pouring more of the clear liquid over the bloody digits, "Please stop I'll tell you who it is, just please stop and let me go; I promise to never do anything like this again please for the love of Kami-sama let me go, ahhh fuck it hurts!" Screamed the Bandit at the end finally starting to break.

"Well then spill, whom is it you work for?"

"Ahhh, if you tell him you fucking moron I will kill you myself, don't tell him." Yelled the apparent leader of the group.

"F F FUCK YOU, his name is Nori, he lives in a house about twenty-three clicks away, now please I promise I will never do anything like this again please let me go." Begged the Bandit to Naruto. For his answer Naruto just walked up and slapped him causing a tooth and blood to fly out.

Now incase you're wondering why Naruto did this, it is a very simple reason remember the seals, well it made it seem like that to the other Bandits that when their buddy told Naruto their employers name it sounded like instead he told Naruto off. So staying in character Naruto had to beat him in order to keep up the charade. Then to only add to it Naruto pulled out the guys tongue and removed it due to his "unwillingness" to cooperate.

"Whaa, what the hell is Naruto doing, this guy just gave him the name of their employer and he goes and does this, I think I'm gonna be sick." Cried Kiba as both Hinata and Shino silently agreed with his assessment of what Naruto did. But it was Kurenai who was the most confused and wanted an answer herself.

"Naruto." Said person, or at least said clone of person turned to Kurenai.

"Why did you cut off his tongue and smack him for giving you the answer?"

"Oh that's simple, you see the seals block out his answer, and at least the answer that I am asking for and instead makes it seems as if he as back talking me, therefore I am playing along to keep up the ruse that he has not answered me correctly."

"Okay, but why?"

"Once again simple, Anko and Ibiki have taught me that just because one says something doesn't make it true, and this way the other bandits cannot hear his answer to also play along therefore keeping them all in the dark and me with the only knowledge so far. This way of another Bandit answers with the same answer I will know it to be true."

Another scream pierced the air as a Naruto and his clones placed needles in the Bandit's kidneys followed by pouring what looked like oil on their hands, which had already had every bone broken. Naruto once again asked the question for what seemed like the millionth time and once again no answer. So igniting the oil Naruto and company watched as it burned at the Bandit's hands and a few seconds later skin and muscle started to melt off. This time all three Genin on team eight vomited, this site only making Kurenai grimace and wish that she had maybe not had her students watch this spectacle and should have waited like most till they were a little older.

But doing what he did, did get the results he wanted right after burning off their hands another Bandit decided to grace Naruto with the name and location of their employer.

"His name is Nori and he lives in a mansion twenty-three clicks due south by south-east of here, now please let use go in peace." Once again begged another Bandit.

"Okay." Replied Naruto, which only made the Bandits faces light up with glee, even without their hands because by now their brains had shut down their nervous system to their arms due to the pain.

"Very well, you may go in peace." Now this had a two prong effect, team eight and Kurenai were all confused since they were told that the people who were interrogated were usually killed or put in jail and these men deserved nothing less but death. But it made the Bandits almost smile because they were now allowed to leave, but when the ropes only continued to tighten around their arms and legs they grew worried, as they should have a while ago.

"Oh did you believe I would let you live, oh silly me no, you are to die, but I will be allowing you to go to the after life in peace, no more pain on my part so enjoy meeting Shinigami-sama." Before the Bandits knew what happened their heads were stabbed right at the base of the spine and head causing instant death.

"So Kurenai-sensei shall we go pay this Nori a visit?" Asked the original Naruto since all the clones dispelled.

Turning to her students Kurenai sized them up and thought long and hard, her mission was over but at the same time the Hokage did say that they were to eliminate all the Bandits and if they kill the leader than all the problems for now will be solved, so technically they could do this and not worry about the Hokage getting mad as long as they alerted him to the development. Her Genin did need to experience and they had already started to might as well finish.

"Yes, team eight we are going to continue the mission and go find this Nori and bring him to justice, we will move out in the morning, no sense in rushing this since we already know where he is going to be." Team eight looked at Kurenai and she saw the relief in their eyes, after what they had been through today was taking both a physical and mental toll on them. With that team eight plus Naruto all went and made camp about five clicks away. Preparing for the day to come, which was sure to cause even more fatigue on the newly made Genin.

While this was going on in Nami we find Anko and Ibiki in Tazuna's house telling Asuma and Kakashi what they found.

"Well this is quite the mess you two have gotten yourselves into, there are over fifty Bandits and at least another four Chuunin level shinobi on top of Zabuza and his accomplish. Good going the both of you." Said Anko, voice dripping with sarcasm.

"While I wouldn't phrase it like Anko here, you two really do know how to pick them, why didn't you return to Konoha and have Tazuna request higher ranked Shinobi, you are only two Jounin and six Genin, no where near the amount of fire power needed to take on a mission of this level; this is no longer a simple C-Rank mission this is now at least a mid A-Rank mission bordering high A-Rank just because Zabuza is here." Calmly replied Ibiki, but if you knew him well enough, which both Kakashi and Asuma did, well then you could tell he was extremely pissed, and I mean extremely pissed, which meant that both Kakashi and Asuma were going to get it when they returned to Konoha.

"Errr" groaned Asuma as he removed his cigarette butt from his mouth while with his other hand went for another one replied in a lazy voice, "Yes, thank you for reminding us, but enough of how we royally fucked up, how are we going to fix our little problem since now with you two here we now have four Jounin and six Genin, this should be enough for the mission. The Genin will be enough for the bandits while one of us takes on the four Chuunin and the rest of us Zabuza."

"While normally yes, that would be a very sound argument there is also one little problem; that being that none of your Genin have high combat training, and after watching those Kunoichi on your teams I am less then enthusiastic about going into live combat. Then we have the males who for some reason cannot work together to save their lives, and most of the blame is to the Uchiha and his arrogance, something if I remember Kakashi you were to work on. Then we have…"

Before Anko could continue her rant Kakashi decided to step in, "Anko, we know we fucked up as you so eloquently phrased it, but that is not the issue here, we can train the Genin for the next week and hopefully that will allow enough time for their skills to improve."

"That is the best we can hope for." Replied Ibiki, while Asuma nodded and Anko just looked on, but on the inside, 'Ahh why me, what the fuck did I ever do to deserve this shit.'

Once again we find ourselves with Karma-same and Shinigami-sama still shit faced and loving it. Laughing at Anko's expense all because she was being grouped in with Naruto, "Hey Karma do you think we are being a little mean?"

"Hell no, wait till she gets pregnant and married to Ibiki, I'm gonna have Naruto be their kids Jounin Sensei!"

"That's so fucked up, but yet so funny, ahh this is gonna be a good couple years." Now back to our favorite purple haired women.

'I suddenly feel like killing Naruto. What ever I have bigger problems.' "Fine to bed we go and tomorrow I get to train the shit stains." Both Asuma and Kakashi were too tired to care and agreed.

While in their rooms all the Genin felt a chill go up their spines as if someone had walked over their graves and took a piss.

The next day we find all six Genin lined up right in front of Anko, who was grinning her sadistic grin of pain with Ibiki standing behind her with their Sensei's, "Okay now you little shits since it is obvious that you are all as I stated before little shits, Ino, Sakura and Sasuke all bristle at this comment, we are going to fix it. So lets start with something simple fifty laps around this clearing." When she saw no one moving she summoned a snake, "Run or my little friend will eat you!" Commanded Anko as her snake did just that and attacked the six Genin who took off running.

"Anko isn't that a bit much with the snake and everything?" Asked Asuma.

"Don't ask, at least it is only one snake and it isn't ordered to attack, at least not on the first day, you should see what she does with Naruto." Sighed Ibiki while looking at his secret girlfriend, which reminded him, "Hey Anko, when are we going to get back at Naruto?"

"How about the next time we see him, I already have everything ready."

"Sounds good, I cannot wait, this will teach the boy to mess with us."

Fifteen minutes later the six Genin stood gasping in front of an irritated Anko, "What took you so long?" It wasn't a question she wanted an answer for, she was disgusted with their performance. "Since it seems you six need some real work and with that said I want you six to practice tree walking." In return she received six questioning looks. Which only caused Anko to turn and look at Kakashi and Asuma, "They don't know tree walking yet?" Anko asked in a not too kind tone, more like the one where your life was in danger. "Never mind."

"You six are to walk up to a tree and stick to it with your chakra. Now get going."

"Asuma, Kakashi what have you two been doing all these weeks?" Ibiki asked as he turned around away from the six Genin who were trying not to get hit by the kunai Anko threw while they tried to tree walk.

"Well…"

"It was a rhetorical question, this is pathetic, and those Genin known nothing I am surprised that they have yet to die. Anko is going to have a ball with those six." With that done Ibiki and company turned and watched as Anko laughed like the crazy ass women she was and the Genin well lets just say that after this if they never saw her again it would be a blessing. But little did they know that their wishes would not come true.

Back with Naruto and company we find the team already in Nori's house with said person tied up and spilling his guts.

"So your boss is Gato, as in the multi billionaire from Gato Inc. and he is the man who supplies you with your men, well I thank you for your information and well I will let Kurenai-sensei and her team decide your fate." Said Naruto who then walked outside.

"Well team what do you think his punishment should be?"

"Death."

"Death." "Bark."

"Ummm, death."

"Well there you have it, enjoy your after life you piece of shit." With that Kurenai stabbed him in his temple killing him instantly.

Outside we find Naruto surrounded by the dead bodies of Nori's guards after the team assaulted the mansion splendidly in his opinion because each of his fellow Genin killed without hesitation and did their jobs. After their talk for three hours that morning they each came to the conclusion that killing for the betterment of the world is bad karma they were willing to build up. Sensing Kurenai and the other three Genin coming up behind him he decided to speak up, "I am going to go help the rest of my team, they will need my help if what Nori told us is anything to go by."

"Naruto, after all the help you have given us as a whole team and the fact that it could be argued to still be apart of our mission we are willing to come along and help you."

"Thank you Kurenai-sensei."

"Now we just need to talk to the Hokage and ask him for his permission."

"There is no need Kurenai, I already received a report from Naruto here and I agree you may go with him for back-up and good luck." Stated Saru who was standing behind Kurenai's team without their knowledge.

"But how?" Asked Kiba.

"Simple I sent a message with one of my summons and Jiji decided to send a clone to listen to us and make a decision." Spoke Naruto. "I also already sent ahead a message to Anko and Ibiki letting them know of our whole teams arrival."

"Very good Naruto, well once again good luck and see you all back in Konoha safe and sound." With that the Hokage disappeared.

"Well then team and Naruto, shall we get going then?" Her answer was four nods and with that they left.

Sorry for the late update, but well the game of life comes to mind and well yeah life is defined as life.

Also thank you for the reviews and now to answer some of them.

1: Yes, Sakura and Ino are immature little girls and they don't act as one is suppose to in front of a leader but guess what, THEY ARE CHILDREN. Saru knows this; he is old and has children and grandchildren of his own. He is not stupid, he knows that the will grow up and mature. Please remember they have been inside a village that has protected them for the first decade and a little more of their lives, they are ignorant. I am not a girl but having two sisters I can tell you that it is true they all have crushes and that knight in shining armor type thing going on, not so much now a days, but in medieval times and stories hold true. But once Anko and Kurenai start helping train them it will diminish.

2: Next, politics are not as simple as most think. Yes, it is a mostly military village, but that doesn't mean that Saru can do what ever the fuck he wants. Shinobi are great for military things but do they want to take the time to make their own house, prepare food, and travel for trade and everything else the civilians' supply instead of training. No, so therefore politics are not as simple once again as some tend to think they are.

3: Lastly the Hokage knows Naruto because he does need to go on trips to different villages and because of that they would meet up and therefore Naruto and Saru made a relationship. It also helps that he is receiving training and traveling with Saru's students.

This is a note to explain my writing style, I do long stories, I hate quick oh hey I love you lets get together etc. No, I love character development, so this story will have lots of it.

Once again sorry for the long wait but yeah, life is a real pain in the ass.


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