Pirates of the Caribbean 1. Chapter 1

Just a Little Kidnapping

Chapter 1

"Well Commodore, I think we might just become chums in the time we're gonna spend together, what say you about that?" Jack said from where he was perched on the corner of his desk.

"Sparrow, just because I did not hang you does not mean I like you. Nor does it mean when I return to Port Royal that hanging will not be forthcoming." James huffed from where he was tied to a chair in the Pirate Captain's cabin. He had a pounding headache which was not made any better by the explanation Jack had just given him for his presence here. He had been in the tavern where he, Andrew Gillette, and Theo Groves had shared what originally was to be a few pints and had turned into a bit more than that. Jack had just finished some story about how a few of his crew had waited for him to exit the tavern and thumped him in the head with a rum bottle, dragged him off and brought him aboard the Pearl.

"Kidnapping an Officer of the Royal Navy is a serious crime Sparrow."

"Captain Sparrow," Jack said with a little frown at James and an impatient flop of his hands, then went on, "Ah, well then it's a good thing I didn't do anything of the sort now isn't it." Jack replied with a flutter of his fingers and a glittering smile on his face.

"I am on a pirate ship, your pirate ship I believe, without my consent, a fact of which I am sure, and undeniably tied to a chair. I would, as well as any person of reasonable intelligence, consider that kidnapping." James snapped irritably.

"All good points Commodore, as well as being mostly true." Jack held his fingers up and counted each point off as he spoke, "You are indeed on a pirate ship, me own fine Pearl as it were, and ya are inescapably tied to a chair, however on the point of consent we have a bit of difference. I did have consent, just not yours." He wiggled both his index fingers in James general direction as he added, "And really Commodore it is a bit of yer own fault you are even here."

James closed his eyes in frustration and clenched his jaw trying to hold in the curses that were fighting to get out. He knew better than to get into a conversation with a daft as a sweep pirate, yet here he was doing just that. He opened his eyes and glared green fire at Jack as he did his best to keep his tone as controlled as possible, although he couldn't keep all the disbelief out of it as he asked, "Am I to understand that you are now blaming me for my own kidnapping?"

"Well that's pretty much the case now isn't it." Jack said with a flip of his hand.

With the same glare James asked, "Would you care to explain?"

"Well it's all rather simple really," Jack said as he poured some rum into a mug and carrying it and the bottle, walked over to James, "Care for a drink Commodore?"

James thought about refusing, if on principle alone, but his throat was dry and scratchy and he figured he better take advantage while it was being offered. As daft as Sparrow was he could lock him away in the hold of the ship at any moment and forget all about him. He nodded his head and Jack held the mug up to his mouth so he could drink. Rum was not his drink of choice but he had to admit it was doing the trick in making his throat feel better. When the mug was empty Jack poured more into it and raised an eyebrow at James, "More?" James thought about it for a moment and then nodded his head. Jack once again assisted him in drinking the mug full then set it on a nearby table.

Jack looked at James, then around the room, and then back at James, "Now what were we discussin?"

"You were about to explain to me why I kidnapped myself." James said sarcastically.

Jack rocked back on his heels, pointed a handful of wiggling fingers at James, smiled, and said, "Oh right, good one Commodore." He took a drink from the rum bottle he held in his other hand and then spoke, "The young Turners are quite something don't you think? Didn't really see the Bonny Lass bein happy with the Whelp, I _was _rooting for you Commodore," He held both index fingers pointing up as he added with a serious expression and tone, "That'd be the truth of it Commodore." Then in a much lighter tone, "But he does somehow seem to be keeping her happy, least wise for the present." He paused for a moment as if he'd lost his train of thought, then with a happy little "Oh" he continued, "She being the Governor's daughter and all thinks it'd be her right to poke and prod into all manner of situations. And der William is such as one that hasn't gotten his sea legs yet when it comes ta reinin in the Young Missy. Mayhaps he never will, but mayhaps he will." Jack stopped again as if pondering this, then shook his head a bit to clear it, causing his beads and other sundry woven into his hair to clatter together as he returned to his speech. "Anyway one of these matters she decided to make her business was in fact the matter of one overly stuffy and stick up the arse Royal Commodore, namely the same Commodore what's now tied to a chair in me cabin as it were. That'd be you ya see." Jack ignored the glare James sent his way and went on, "Seems she was concerned you was workin yerself too hard and not takin near enough time out for enjoyin life. So she decided to act and fix the problem so to speak." Jack stopped and gave James a grin.

"She is not the one that kidnapped me Sparrow." James retorted.

"Aye Commodore, however she was the grand architect, so to speak, of the plan to make sure ya wasn't hold up behind that pile o parchment ya seem so fond of and get ya out and about."

"So because I take my responsibility as Commodore seriously I have been knocked unconscious, dragged aboard a pirate ship, tied to a chair, and forced to endure the company of a rum soaked daft pirate?" James retorted.

"Pretty much." Jack replied with a smile and a flop of his hands, then added, "Although the knockin in the head was the spur of the moment idea of one of the members of the crew that was sent after ya. He's not of much of a large stature hisself and I guess ya looked a bit formidable to him once he got up close." Jack said with a shrug.

"Indeed!" James snapped.

"You'll be glad ta know though Commodore I did speak to him on the matter and informed him next time ta go a bit easier on the thumpin."

"You have no idea how that comforts me Sparrow." James snipped.

"Aye, thought you'd be appreciatin that bit of information." Jack said with a smile and a flourish of hands.

"So just what do you intend to do with me?"

"Haven't quite figured that out as yet Commodore, although the bonny lass was insistent on makin clear she did want ya ta have a good relaxin time."

"And she thought having me kidnapped and tied to a chair aboard a pirate ship would be the way to accomplish this?" James snarked.

"Not sure she went so far as ta think out all the variables of the plan." Jack said with a little frown.

"It would seem not." James retorted, "So how long am I to _enjoy_ myself being tied up in your cabin? Or has that not been thought out all the way either?"

"Now I have in fact worked that little part out on me onsies Commodore. Seein as you are mostly a reasonable man, and knowin now yer in no danger of bein harmed by me or me crew, barring any accidental accidents while aboard of course, I'm thinkin as soon as we are beyond the possibility of ya commandeerin a longboat and rowin yerself ta shore would be the opportune time ta be unbindin ya and allowin ya ta roam at will and begin the enjoyin as it were."

"And what makes you think I will not throttle you the moment I am free to _enjoy_ myself?"

Jack gave him a pouty look and said, "Didn't think ya was gonna be such a poor sport about it Commodore. Sides I don't think the Young Lassie would appreciate that in the least, not to mention me own appreciation of such a happenin."

To Be Continued

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5


	2. Chapter 2

Just a Little Kidnapping Chapter 2

Just a Little Kidnapping

Chapter 2

"What would give you the idea I would care what Mrs. Turner's thoughts on the matter were or that I would change my actions to suit her?"

"Ah," Jack said holding his fingers up in front of him, "there's the rub then Commodore, cause ya do care what she thinks, ya care a lot, a bit too much if truth were known. And everyone winds up changes their actions for the lass when that's what she wants, willingly or not. She can be quite the persistent little terrier when she's made her mind up to something, nippin and bitin at a persons heels till she gets her way. Sometimes the only thing to do when dealin with Elizabeth Turner is turn around and sail as far away as possible."

"Well then perhaps I shall have to settle for a _half_ throttling done several times over." James snipped.

Jack gave James a pout, "I'm not seein here how that is any better than the full throttlin that was ta be done once Commodore."

"Ah, but it would no doubt prove much more satisfying for me _Captain_ Sparrow." James snarked.

Jack poutily picked up his rum and took a drink, paused for a moment as he eyed James, then smiled, set the rum down and walked over behind James' chair.

"Ya know Commodore, I'm glad ya weren't in possession of that gaudy and totally useless bit of frippery atop yer fine head when me men accosted ya." Jack said in a low tone as he lightly touched James' hair. "This is much more pleasin."

James jerked his head as far as he could from Jack's touch. "What are you doing?" James said with a little bit of alarm in his tone.

"Admirin Commodore." Jack said with a smile.

"Well stop it immediately!"

"Now Commodore, if I'm ta be throttled, either once or…more times, I might as well be doin somethin that's fittin of deservin it now hadn't I?"

Jack continued without waiting for a response, he ran his hands over James' shoulders and down just a bit on his chest with the barest of touches as he said, "Ya look much more better in this fine shirt and vest than ya do in that stiff and overly decorated thing ya call a uniform."

James had shut his eyes and pressed himself back against the chair as much as he could trying to evade those hands, "Spar…..Captain Sparrow…..please."

"Ah beggin now are we Commodore?" Jack said, then placing his hands on James' shoulders and leaning in close to James' ear he whispered, "I think I've just decided what I intend to do with yer fine self Commodore."

"I'm not at all sure I wish to know that particular piece of information any more Sparrow." James replied.

"Oh I think this will be of some interest to ya as it will be yer fair and favorable Commodore-ly body what's involved." Jack said still very close to the man's ear.

James was starting to sweat and his anxiety level was at such heights he was surprised his heart hadn't exploded. He took several deep breaths trying to gain some control over himself then spat out, "Then do your worst Pirate."

"Ah, not so much for the gentle approach I see." Jack replied and James could hear the amusement in his tone.

"Whatever it is you intend to do to me then get on with it or leave me be." James said, managing to interject a bit of his Commodore-ly tone as he spoke.

"I think yer showin a bit too much impatience here Commodore, some times these things take a bit of building up to as it were. Can't be springin something like this on a body, tends ta ruin the mood so to speak."

"I refuse to allow you to intimidate me any further. So be on with it." James snapped.

"Very well then Commodore," Jack said as he patted James' shoulder. "You are familiar with the handlin and runnin and various tasks what's required aboard ship are you not?"

"What?" James said totally thrown off by Jack's question.

"A ship man, the thing you are currently sitting on…er in….er.. well a ship. I would suppose they didn't throw ya right into a Commodore's rank and station the minute ya stepped aboard yer first ship. Surely somewhere in yer fine career ya was required ta scurry aloft or handle a line or even do a bit of caulkin were ya not?"

James was still nonplus, "What has this got to do with what you were just doing…"

Jack waived his hand about as he interrupted James, "Don't know what you were thinking I was doing….but I do think I think I know what I was doing and apparently you were not thinking I was in fact doing what it was I was indeed doing." With a raise of eyebrows at James Jack said, "Really Commodore, you need to get yer mind out of the gutter and concentrate on what I am saying which is in fact what I have decided to do with you while you are aboard me ship." Jack began flopping his hands about as he continued, "What I am in fact saying is that I think a bit of work aboard the Pearl may be just what ya need ta get the sea back into ya and a bit more enjoyment in yer life as it were."

"A deckhand, you think being a deckhand aboard a pirate ship would be an enjoyable thing for me?" James said disbelievingly.

"Aye." Jack replied with a wide glittering grin.

"So all that touching and whispering was……"

Once again Jack interrupted with a flutter of his hands, "Trifles Commodore." Then with a curious look at James, "Why? Did ya enjoy that?"

"Oh please!" James huffed with more than a bit of irritation.

Jack shrugged his shoulders, "Just a thought Commodore."

To Be Continued

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4


	3. Chapter 3

Just a Little Kidnapping Chapter 3

Just a Little Kidnapping

Chapter 3

For three more days James was kept tied to the chair, oh he was escorted out to perform necessary bodily functions, but other than that he remained in the chair. The worst time was at night, James couldn't sleep well in the chair, and even if he would have been able to it would have been interrupted by the restlessness of the man in the bed not five feet from him. Although Jack didn't sleep more that three or four hours at a time when he did sleep he mumbled and thrashed and talked and jerked and was infinitely irritating. He had even walked about the cabin with a sword in his hand once time apparently sound asleep, and the sight of a naked, mumbling, and wildly gesturing pirate with a blade in his hand was not a sight James cared to see again.

Around noon on the third day Jack brought his lunch into him with a smile and a wink. He pulled a chair over so his knees were up against James' as he prepared to feed him.

James gave him a glare, "Must you do that?"

"What?" Jack replied with his most innocent expression.

"Touch me." James snapped.

"Don't have to Commodore." Jack answered a bit poutily.

"Then why do you insist on doing just that whenever you are anywhere near me?" James said with irritation on his face and in his tone.

"'m just a touchy sort, in a good way ya understand, not like you who are in fact a touchy sort of a totally different sort." Jack said with a flutter of fingers.

"Oh please." James snipped.

Jack began to feed him, every third bite taking the rag that was serving as a napkin and wiping his mouth thoroughly.

"Must you do that?" James snapped the fifth time Jack did it.

Jack leaned back and looked at James, "Now what is it I'm doing?"

"You know perfectly well what you are doing." James snipped.

"No I don't." Jack said, his tone pitched rather high and sounding offended.

"Oh I think you do." James said in a low aggravated tone.

Jack gave James a moue and dropped the spoon into the bowl. "Perhaps you'd care to enlighten me a bit here Commodore since I don't have the slightest bloody idea what you're on about now."

"You are wiping my mouth in an excessive manner with that rag." James snapped.

Jack looked dumbfounded at James for a moment before replying, "You've really got a problem with this touchin stuff don't ya Commodore. No wonder ya haven't found yerself a girl."

James glared then next to shouted, "I did find myself a girl, and you see how that turned out!"

"Well can't really be blamin the bonny lass if ya didn't allow her ta touch ya, even so much as a bit of handholdin and such as that might a done wonders for yer relationship there Commodore." Jack said with a raised eyebrow.

"I will have you know we did touch." James said still close to a shout.

Jack got a look of interest on his face as he leaned forward and said, "Really! Well tell old Jack all about the touchin that went on atween the two of ya."

James turned a lovely shade of red and clamped his mouth shut tighter than a clam as he glared at Jack.

"Come on Commodore, don't stop now. Ya've already started, might as well tell the good parts and not leave me hangin here." Jack wheedled.

James opened his mouth far enough to spit out an unequivocal "No" before clamping it shut again.

"You've no manner of sportingness about ya at all do ya Commodore." Jack said with a pout.

"No."

"Do ya want ta finish this stew?"

"No."

"Just so ya know Commodore, me intent was ta set ya free after ya finished yer lunch, but seein as ya haven't finished yer lunch, and seem ta have a story of some interest ta be telling, not ta mention the fact that you've turned into one big bundle of irritableness over the untellin of said story I'm not atoll sure this would be the most opportune time for me to be doin such, just so ya know. I'll come back later n mayhaps yer mood will have lightened a bit and you'll feel a bit more like talking and in fact tellin." Jack rose from the chair, picked up the bowl and turned to leave.

"Sparrow…."

Jack kept walking.

"Sparrow." With a bit more insistence and perhaps a bit of imploring.

Jack kept walking.

"Captain Sparrow…"

Jack stopped and turned, "Yes Commodore?"

James closed his eyes for a moment, wishing at least one of his hands was not bound so he could pinch the bridge of his nose, took a deep breath, opened his eyes, stared at the wall and started to speak, "Late one night I was coming back from a surprise inspection of the men on duty aboard the Dauntless. I ran into Miss Swann walking towards the bay. As you can well guess I was surprised to see her out unescorted at such a late hour. When I asked her what she was doing she said she often came down by the waters edge at night to think. I admonished her that it was not safe, even in Port Royal, for an unchaperoned lady, especially an unmarried one, and the Governor's daughter at that to be out walking by herself.

Jack smirked as he interjected, "My my James, you are the romantic type aren't ya."

James gave him a disgusted look, "Do you want to hear the story or not?"

"Not if yer gonna bore me to death afore ya get to the good parts." Jack snarked back.

James snorted and then continued, "To make a long story short.."

Jack let out a sigh and said, "Bout time mate."

James huffed and repeated, "To make a long story short being loath to let her travel alone I found myself in the company of Miss Swann on an entirely deserted area of the bay. We talked for a short time then unexpectedly she reached up and kissed me."

Jack looked at James with disbelief, "That's it?"

"I did kiss her back." James said defensively.

"No overflowin of an overly passionate nature? No rippin and tearin asunder of clothes? No ravishments and debauchments of body parts? She kissed you and you kissed her back, that's what happened? That's _all_ that happened?" Jack ranted. When he was done with his rant he looked at James and said, "I ought ta leave yer bloody arse tied to that chair for the entire voyage."

James straightened as much as he could tied to the chair and huffed, "I can't help it if you were expecting a tale of passion and clothes tearing and ravishments of bodies, I told you exactly what happened, that was the bargain, now cut me loose."

Jack glared at James for a few moments, pulled his knife out and mumbled as he cut the man's bindings, "Bloody poncy stick up the arse Commodore, can't even tell a good story, don't know the first thing about exaggerations and embellishments and the like. No sense of scintillation in story tellin about 'im atoll." Then right before he turned to leave he looked at James and said with a pout, "Last time I ask you to tell a story."

As James sat there rubbing his wrists he snapped back, "I told you I didn't want to tell it in the first place."

To Be Continued

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	4. Chapter 4

Just a Little Kidnapping Chapter 4

Just a Little Kidnapping

Chapter 4

As James stepped out of the cabin and looked around, seeing nothing but ocean around them, Mr. Gibbs hesitantly approached him looking for all the world like he would rather be approaching the gallows.

"Cap'n said ya'd be helpin us out on deck Commodore.. eh….sir?" Mr. Gibbs said in a clearly questioning tone.

"Apparently." James said with the very essence of brevity.

Mr. Gibbs paused and looked a bit apprehensively at James.

"What is it Mr. Gibbs? Have I suddenly grown another head?" James snapped.

"No Commodore…eh…si…er.. no, just not sure what manner of what it is you'd be fit for doin." Mr. Gibbs replied.

"I'm thinkin he'd make a fine anchor." AnnaMaria snarked as she walked by. "Be willin ta put 'im to the test if ya want."

James glared at her as she passed then huffed at Mr. Gibbs, "I _was_ once a midshipman, I have done everything on a ship that you yourself have done, other than divide ill gotten gains perhaps."

Gibbs didn't look like he was convinced, and was having a hard time ordering his former Lieutenant to do anything. As he looked around trying to decide what to tell the man to do he noticed Jack looking at him from the wheel and said the first thing that popped into his head, "Alright then Commodore, what say you start with a bit of polishin? Ask Mr. Cotton fer what you'll need." Satisfied he had come up with something that wasn't too demeaning nor too hard for the man he smiled, and walked off.

James looked around the deck with not a clue who Mr. Cotton was. He took the opportunity as a crew member walked by to ask where he could find Mr. Cotton and was pointed towards a man just coming on deck from the companionway with a parrot on his shoulder. James snorted, shook his head, and headed off to intercept the man.

Stepping in front of him James asked, "Are you Mr. Cotton?" He received no response from the man other than the man looking at him; however the parrot on his shoulder bobbed his head up and down at James and squawked loudly, "Pieces of eight…..pieces of eight."

James gave the bird a frown, looked at Mr. Cotton again, repeated his question, and received the same results as before. James gave the bird a disgusted look and was just about to repeat his question for the third, and he had made up his mind, the last time when he felt someone nudge themselves up beside him.

"I take it ya've never learned ta speak parrot eh Commodore?" Jack said as he leaned in close to James and fluttered his fingers at him.

James gave him a moue at the invasion of his personal space and moved his head away a little; unfortunately he moved it the direction of the parrot who wasted no time in latching onto the ribbon holding James hair. James jerked away causing him to come into semi-intimate contact with Jack, who smiled and snarked, "Ah seems we have come to an accord with the touchin issue after all, eh Commodore?"

James jerked once again, this time making sure he was out of both the parrot and Jacks territory, shot them both a highly irritated look, and one at Mr. Cotton just for good measure, turned and stalked off towards the cabin.

Jack gave Mr. Cotton a shrug and a flip of his hands at the retreating Commodore's back, "Them bleedin English Naval Toffs 'r all the same, their fuses go off without even strikin fire the whole lot of 'em."

Mr. Cotton shrugged back and when on about his business.

Jack followed James to the cabin, peeked in to make sure James didn't have any manner of weapon in his hand, then entered and in a mostly sincere tone as he rocked back and forth on his heels fluttering a hand about, "Ya know Commodore we can't be doin it all in makin sure yer time here is of the mainly enjoyable kind, yer gonna have ta help wif it a little."

James stopped dead where he had been pacing in front of the windows and glared at Jack, "So not only is it my fault I was kidnapped it is now my fault I am not having an enjoyable time during such kidnapping, is that it Sparrow?"

"Captain Jack Sparrow if you please, and I'm just sayin it doesn't appear yer even tryin here mate. Never seen someone with such a short fuse as the one you parade around with Commodore. 's not good on a body ta be constantly settin his course on that tack and bearin."

"So you are telling me if you were in my position you would just relax and enjoy yourself?" James snipped.

"If I knew I was meant no bodily harm nor ill will nor more grevious but unnamed acts against me person, was offered pretty much free run with no strings…or ropes for that matter attached, was provided with three squares a day for which I didn't have ta so much as lift a finger ta get nor worry bout bein poisoned, was offered a bit of camaraderie as well, that some one cared about me enough ta worry bout whether I was workin and worryin meself inta an early trip ta be lookin up from six feet under, and out of that carin, knowin I wasn't about ta do it meself, put me in a spot that all I had to do was enjoy the enjoyin of no responsibility, that me time was pretty much me own ta do with what I wished and pleased ta an extent as it were, ta just sail or stand and gaze out on the beauty and magnificence surroundin me…… I'm thinkin here that's just exactly what I would do Commodore."

James was silent as he mulled over Jack's words, after a few moments with the corners of his mouth quirking a bit he said, "She could not have just had me marooned on some nice little deserted island somewhere?"

"Now Commodore," Jack said throwing his arms wide, "it'd be Lizzie we're talking bout here…..'sides wha'd be the fun in that?"

To Be Continued

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	5. Chapter 5

Just a Little Kidnapping Chapter 5

Just a Little Kidnapping

Chapter 5

After Jack left the cabin James considered his situation and decided there was but one thing to do. He knew they were too far away from any land for him to make an escape that would conclude with his survival of such, and since it was apparent the Pirate was not about to return him to Port Royal until Mrs. Elizabeth Turner's edict concerning him was accomplished he would have to appear, at least on the surface of things, that he was enjoying himself. So he made up his mind that he would do just that, put all his considerable efforts into _appearing to_ _enjoying_ himself. The sooner he got back to Port Royal the sooner he would be able to give one Elizabeth Swann Turner a not inconsiderable piece of his mind about her meddling in his business.

He squared his shoulders, opened the door of the cabin, and stepped back out on deck.

"Mr. Cotton." James called out as he spotted the man and his bird. Mr. Cotton turned to face him and the parrot flapped his wings and squawked, "Awwwk..give no quarter!"

James gave the bird a glare then remembering his resolution, put a bland look on his face and said, "I was told you would provide me with the necessaries for polishing the brasswork aboard."

Mr. Cotton nodded and motioned for James to follow him. Mr. Cotton walked over and picked up a rag and a small pot and handed them to James. The parrot squawked as James took them, "Awwwk.. step lively there sailor!"

James once again let his face slip and gave the bird a moue as he turned and walked off to begin.

Xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

James hadn't realized how good it would feel to do a good days worth of physical labor. He had become so involved in what he was doing the sun was already starting to set before he knew it, in fact he might have kept working had not his stomach began to growl. He set the rag and pot down next to where he had been working, stretched his back and arms, and with a slight smile threatening to break out across his face went off to find something to eat.

He entered the galley and nodded amiably to the few members of the crew that were present, went over and acquired a plate of food and a mug of ale and found a seat at one of the tables. He could feel the eyes of the men on him as he sat there. He knew his presence aboard was a bit unsettling to them, not knowing whether he might all of a sudden slap his uniform and wig on and take the notion to hang them all from the yardarm. No matter how ridiculous that possibility was he knew it was on their minds, and not wanting to take the chance that one of them might do something untoward to him in fear of something like that happening, and not being one for subtleties he put his spoon down, stood up, cleared his throat, and announced, "Hello there I'm James, it seems I have been given the hopefully temporary opportunity to become a member of this fine crew gentlemen. I want nothing more than, and will endeavor to do my utmost, to do my part in what ever way I can while I am here to see to the efficient running of this ship. This would, by the way, not encompass any manner of bodily harm or hanging of any crew members what so ever on my part. I would hope the reverse is true as well. I am just trying to work my way back home here gentlemen."

They looked at James, then at each other. A few of them shrugged a little, and within a few moments all of them had returned to their conversations and food, ignoring James totally. James sat back down and began on his own bowl of stew.

"Ah, a fine example of why you're a leader of men." Jack said as he slid into a seat next to James.

James snorted a bit, "Hopefully just staying the possibility of getting a knife in my back."

"And a fine ideal that is Commodore, although the one what's likely ta be doin such as that wasn't present fer yer little speech. That'd be AnnaMaria who is presently steering me fine ship. Mayhaps ya ought ta go topside and give her yer whimsical little recitation." Jack said as he fluttered his fingers around, made walking motions with said fingers, then pointed up as he finished.

"Perhaps that would not be such a bad idea." James answered as he thought over what Jack said.

Jack recoiled in mock-shock, an expression of horror on his face, "It'd be a terrible idea Commodore, no doubt bringin about the very thing yer tryin so hard ta avoid, although more 'n likely it wouldn't be a knife in yer back, more like one planted right square in yer front parts afore ya was even partially inta yer little speech. Honestly Commodore you've no manner of self-preservation 'bout ya at all have ya?"

James glared at Jack and snapped, "Then why did you suggest it?"

"I was speaking in an entirely facetiously jesting manner Commodore, didn't think ya was gonna take me words ta heart, gods above man anyone who knows AnnaMaria knows ya just don't walk up to her and start conversin, ya avoid her at all costs less she corners ya and ya don't have a choice in the matter, 'n even then ya do yer utmost ta extradite yerself from her overly unpropitious and downright loomin presence at the first opportune moment, no sense in provokin her into the doin of that which you'd most likely find yerself sorry for after the doin of the very self same."

James expression showed amusement as he stated, "You are afraid of her."

Jack pouted at James, "Only a little." Then leaning over and looking back over his shoulders as if making sure the woman they were discussing hadn't slipped up on him, "You would be too if ya had any manner of wiseness about ya Commodore."

"Indeed!" James scoffed.

"No really Commodore." To prove his point he stood suddenly, pointed at the door and said, "Look lively men, here comes AnnaMaria and she don't look happy in the least."

Within seconds the men were up and stumbling over each other and shoving each other out of the way to make it to the door and away from what they apparently considered a very big threat to their persons.

Jack smiled at James and gestured at the men bottlenecked at the door trying to jam through.

"It appears you should do something before they wind up hurting themselves." James said dryly.

"Oh aye." Jack said, then called out as he rocked back and forth on his heels and waved his arms around, "Oye there men, sorry my mistake. Thought that was her comin but no it don't now appear it was. Sorry. You can all settle down now, false alarm, sorry. Come back to yer meals gents, everybody sit down, no need for alarm men. All an unfortunate and unplanned and unmeant and entirely mistaken presumption on my part. Sorry."

As the men returned to their places at the table, some glaring at Jack and some still looking around to make sure AnnaMaria wasn't about to come storming in Jack looked at James in triumph.

James gave him the slightest of smiles and a nod of his head as he said, "Point taken. I shall reconsider approaching the woman with my…..recitation."

Jack held up an index finger as he leaned towards James, "I'd avoid approachin her with any manner of thing Commodore."

To Be Continued

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	6. Chapter 6

Just a Little Kidnapping Chapter 6

Just a Little Kidnapping

Chapter 6

James went to stand by the rail and gaze at the stars after finishing his supper.

"D'ye ever wonder 'bout what's all up there Commodore?" Jack asked as he joined James by the rail, his own gaze on the stars.

James glanced over at Jack, then back at the shards of light shimmering above them. As memories from the past flitted through his mind he smiled and answered, "When I was a young boy I sometimes used to sneak out of the house at night to go lay in the meadow that adjoined our property and look at the stars. Since I was not yet old enough to go to sea it seemed to me the vastness of the heavens was the closest thing to where I wished to be. I could lay there on my back and make believe I was at sea with nothing but water and sky surrounding me."

"Ah," Jack said good humouredly, "So ya _do_ have a bit of rule breakin in yer past."

"Only a little, unlike yourself no doubt." James replied good humouredly as well.

"Might surprise ya if ya knew when me less than lawfully abidin days began Commodore, doubt it'd be what ya'd expect." Jack replied.

"So you weren't stealing pies and cookies cooling on the windowsill as soon as you could totter about?" James asked in jest.

"Wasn't never forced ta steal 'em, Cook doted on me as did me dear Grandmother." Jack answered, a smile on his face as if reliving pleasant memories.

James started to press for details of Jack's younger years but thought better of it. If Jack's childhood was anything like his own there were too many things better left buried.

"How old were you when you first went to sea?" James settled for asking instead.

Jack was silent for long enough James wondered if he was going to answer. Then softly he heard the man begin to speak, "Me Da was a sailor, well still is in a manner I suppose. Me Mum and I used to go with him sometimes." Then as if he realized he was speaking out loud he straightened up and glanced at James, "Think I'll just go find me rum." He looked up at the stars once more then turned and walked off.

James stood there at the rail for another hour or so before deciding it was time to turn in. Of course that's when it struck him he would have to find a place to sleep, "And it will definitely not be in a chair." He snorted to himself. Even after his little speech at supper he wasn't sure it was a good idea to trust the crew enough to bunk with them, besides that would no doubt be quite noisy and keep him up most of the night. The Captain's cabin was also not high on his list of places to bunk. He could probably find a spare hammock and a quiet out of the way place to hang it. He asked a few of the men on watch if they knew where he could obtain a hammock and was answered with shrugs and no helpful suggestions what so ever. He huffed a little and went and knocked on Jack's door.

"Come." Jack called from where he was sitting at his desk, and as James entered he smiled and fluttered his hands about, "Ah Commodore, come to turn in for the night?"

"I was thinking more along the lines of hanging a hammock, if you have one I may use, somewhere quiet." James replied.

"Are ya sayin I'm not quiet in me sleepin?" Jack said a bit offended.

"Yes." James replied dryly.

"Oh. Don't think I've ever had complaints bout that before." Jack said, his head tipped to the side, a finger tapping his chin, "Well Commodore, there'd be an extra hammock in that wardrobe over there but where yer gonna sling it is another matter."

"I'm sure I can find a place on deck Captain." James said as he opened the wardrobe and dodged several things that came tumbling out at him. He spotted the hammock and pulled it out. Just as he turned and headed for the door there was a loud clap of thunder and the sound of heavy rain.

"Well don't appear it'll be the deck less you've acquired gills Commodore." Jack said and even without looking at him James could tell he was grinning that irritating grin. "Course there's always the hold, though I'm doubtin it'd be smellin real fresh down there since we had that Maroilles cheese we took off that French merchant a few weeks ago rot down there, course even if not for the rotten cheesy smell the rats tend ta get a bit rowdy down there at night, specially now's how they have all that rotted cheese ta be fightin over, however yer more than welcome ta bunk there if ya wish." He paused and then added, "Seems other than with the crew or here Commodore yer choices are a bit on the narrow side."

James turned around and looked at Jack, "Yer choice Commodore." Jack said as he swayed over, sat down on the bed and pulled his boots off, stretched out, turned his back to James and appeared to almost instantly fall asleep.

James muttered a string of very uncomplimentary descriptive statements about the Pirate now apparently sound asleep on the bunk as he looked around for the hooks to hang the hammock. When he had the hammock hung and had commandeered a blanket and a pillow from Jack's bed he climbed into the hammock, this taking a few tries before he was successful, cautiously made himself as comfortable as possible, and drifted off to sleep with all manner of dreams of what he would like to do to a certain Pirate and a certain Governor's Daughter for putting him in the situation he was presently in.

Jack lay there listening to the soft snores coming from across the room and smiled. Jack had never met anyone that was so easy to send into fits of irritation or embarrassment. Most of the time all it took was a look or a few words from Jack to do it, and Jack found himself unable to resist. "Pro'ly a good thing the Commodore ain't of the violent persuasion." Jack thought to himself as he made himself comfortable and he too drifted off to sleep.

To Be Continued

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	7. Chapter 7

Just a Little Kidnapping Chapter 7

Just a Little Kidnapping

Chapter 7

James, still more asleep than awake, felt something brush across his nose, then a second time a few moments later. He scrunched his nose up and it stopped. He had almost fallen back into a sound slumber when something brushed across his nose again. He turned his head to the side and put a hand up to swat away what ever it was disturbing his sleep, and encountered nothing there. As he fell back into a close to sound slumber something brushed across his half open mouth. He reared up in the hammock and before he had a chance even to open his eyes fully his head came into contact with something hard as the hammock, which he had set into violent motion with his sudden movement, pitched him out on the deck. As he rolled over on his back out of the corner of his eye saw Sparrow quickly swaying back towards his bunk.

"What were you doing?" James said with irritation as he rubbed his forehead and glared at Jack.

Jack gave him his best innocent look, which was not quite as effective as he could have hoped for seeing as he was rubbing his own forehead, "Nothin."

James huffed, "You were over here doing something Sparrow, I saw you returning to your bunk."

"'s yer own fault I was over there." Jack said with a pout.

"Oh here we go again." James said sarcastically, "When, I'm wondering, will the list of things of late that are my fault end?" Then rolling his eyes and making a 'go ahead' gesture with his hand towards Jack, "Please do explain."

"I thought ya was dead or somfin." Jack replied, looking at James with as sincere a look as he could muster.

"What could possibly give you the idea I was dead, although I am beginning to think that might be a great improvement and more than preferable to keeping the company I have been forced to keep lately." James retorted.

"It was the way ya was sleepin." Jack replied with a flutter of his hands.

"The way I was sleeping?" James answered. "Oh do go on."

"Ya was layin there all peaceful like."

"So because I was sleeping peacefully and undisturbed that made you think I might have died? Really Sparrow I would have surmised being as proficient in the art of twisting and turning a phrase as you are you surely could have come up with a better reason than that."

"'s the truth James, didn't appear ya was breathin, and ya wasn't makin so much as a wisp of a whimper 'r snore 'r nothin. Seen stranger things happen," Jack said trying to justify his concern, "Once shipped out with a mate did that very thing, slept so quiet he missed muster twice for anyone realized he'd passed over. We all thought he was just real tired."

"Oh please!" James snipped. "I will thank you and that mess you call hair to stay away from my hammock from now on and leave my sleep undisturbed. Do I make myself clear?"

"Disturbingly." Jack replied.

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For the next several days it appeared Jack was steering clear of James, had taken his warning seriously. Even when he retired for the night Jack stayed clear of the cabin. James did notice when he came out of the cabin in the morning Jack would go in, more than likely to catch up on the sleep he had forgone the night before. James was just starting to let go of a little of the irritation he felt whenever Jack was around and doing his touchy feely routine. He even thought he might actually be able to relax some and enjoy himself a little without having to worry about what _he_ considered inappropriate touching from the Pirate which was in fact any touching at all, he had been to the point that even a handshake would have been too much touching.

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James returned to keeping himself busy with the tasks required to keep a ship running smoothly, a goal that was near and dear to his heart. Most of the crew were still warily accepting of his presence, although he did feel an undercurrent that wouldn't take much to turn against him. He did his best to return smiles when smiles were offered, which was not often, other than that he kept to himself, or tried to. There were the occasional and highly uncomfortable but thankfully brief visits from AnnaMaria as he attended to some task on deck.

She would stand there for a bit and glare at him, make some snarky comment and then walk off. During those little visits he always had the feeling she was just a hair away from pulling dagger or sword and slicing him to pieces should he so much as give her what she consider a 'wrong' look. He always made sure to keep his expression as bland as possible and always breathed a sigh of relief when she stalked off.

Xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

He had just endured one of AnnaMaria's visits a few minutes before finishing up the sail he was mending. His nerves were on edge from said visit and he was ready to leave the deck for the quiet of the cabin, having seen Jack come out a short time ago. Perhaps he would spend the rest of the afternoon reading in there.

As he began to gather the sail, concentrating on that task rather than what, or who, was around him, someone bumped him from behind, their hands grabbing him around the hips. James whirled around to find Sparrow standing there. Before he even had a chance to really process what he was doing he had punched the pirate in the nose. As blood started spurting from the man's nose there were a dozen knives and twice that many cutlasses pointed at him, most at a distance than was more than uncomfortably close to the majority of his vital organs.

He raised his hands slowly, palms out, to chest height to show he was not about to do anything further as stupid as he had just done.

"I say we string him up right here and now!" One of them shouted and was immediately joined with shouts of _string 'em up_ from quite a few of the crew. Most of the rest shouting _run 'em through_.

James closed his eyes and stood there his posture straight, his expression stoic as he awaited his fate, sure this was it.

"Which one of you scabrous pieces of jetsam care ta come through me ta get to 'im?" A voice shouted over the voices which instantly quieted. "That's what I thought, now back to work ya scurrilous bunch of loggerheaded codpieces."

James opened his eyes to make sure what he thought was happening was actually happening, and sure enough there was AnnaMaria standing between him and the until moments ago thirsty for his blood deckhands. As she put her hand on her cutlass they immediately dispersed.

As she turned around he gave her a thanks, she snorted and pointing at Jack said, "Don't be thankin me navy, if it were up ta me you'd be swingin up there in the breeze. He's the one ya better thank." Then she stomped off shouting mercilessly at any deck hand not hard at work or even a few that were and just happened to be a bit too close to where she was stomping.

Jack fluttered one hand as the other continued to hold a rag up to his nose and in a very nasally tone said, "She didn't mean it ya know."

"She sounded rather serious to me." James said as he watched her stalk off.

"Aye but then you don't know her like I do. If she really held a dislike for ya as strong as the one she is appearing to hold against you Commodore you'd be hangin from the yard even as we speak regardless of how I was feelin bout the whole thing ya see." Then considering what he had just said he amended his statement, "Of course if that were the case, a case of her actual dislike of you being what she actually felt for you then we would not in fact be speaking now, although in fact I might be speaking to you, however it would be a bit difficult for you to answer or even attempt to speak to me in return in any manner what so ever as you would be dangling from the yard and would in fact have a rope rather a bit too tightly around your neck which would in fact tend to hamper the reciprocating of any conversin by you of any conversations and or conversin I might be the initiator of while you were in such a state if you catch my meaning here. Although," he continued as he tapped his chin for a moment or two with his index finger, "I doubt I would be initiating any conversations with you or anyone else for that matter that happened to be hanging by a rope from me yard if ya get me meaning here Commodore. Wouldn't make the least amount of sense ta be doin such now would it?"

"So it would seem." James answered as he shook his head and walked off toward the cabin.

To Be Continued

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	8. Chapter 8

Just a Little Kidnapping Chapter 8

Just a Little Kidnapping

Chapter 8

"Ya are aware Commodore, that me not totally unpleasurable on my part yet unappreciated on your part and totally accidental groping of yer person was caused by an unfortunate and entirely unforeseeable series of circumstances that had nothing what so ever to do with me?" Jack said as he followed James into the cabin. He swayed back on his heels as James whirled around and glared at him, "Shall I punch you again?"

Jack fluttered the hand that wasn't holding the rag to his nose in the air between them, "No need for that Commodore. Was just trying to clarify a clearly unclarified point here you see, I was pushed."

"Indeed! And do you really think after the multitude of other times you have found it necessary to enact some manner of inappropriate touching on my person I am going to take your word that this one was an accident? Shall we excuse them all as accidents?" James retorted irritatedly.

Jack looked at him with an expression of innocence, "Multitude ya say. Don't know bout there bein a multitude of inappropriate touchin on my part to your…parts."

"That can be explained by the fact you clearly have no idea what would encompass any form of inappropriateness what so ever." James replied, his tone still irritated.

Jack smiled a glittering smile as he flopped his hand about, "Well then there you have it Commodore."

"There I have what?" James said snippily as he scowled at Jack and that smile.

"Well you've just said it yourself now haven't ya. And I'd be sayin yer own words uttered by yer own self as it were takes me off the hook here so to speak."

"You have lost me Sparrow, what _are_ you babbling about?"

"Well it clearly seems ta me that to you I clearly have no idea what would clearly be to you inappropriate touching ergo it would be clearly and entirely unfair and inappropriate for you to be holding any inappropriate touching however clearly done by me against you against me if ya get my meaning and therefore I would be of the mind that you should clearly not inappropriately hold any inappropriate touching by me in any future instance in any way against my personal person. Savvy?"

James huffed, "No I do not savvy. I do however feel an overwhelming urge to punch you again just for allowing that clearly unclear and totally inappropriate babble to spew from you mouth."

Jack eyed James to gauge how serious he was, took a step back just to be sure he was out of range, put his hands, palms together in front of him and said, "Commodore, once was quite enough I assure you, and I'm feelin here that particular action would in and of its self clearly be a bit inappropriate. 'sides I just got the bloody bleedin stopped from the last time."

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The next few days, when compared with the last few were uneventful. James went about his business and Jack went about his, for the most part. James noticed it seemed the man could not help every once and awhile approaching him, although he was sure to stay out of touching or being 'touched' distance when he did. Most of the time he would stand there and rattle off some bit of something and then swagger off. One time, from what sense James could make out of it, had been something about cuttlefish and crabs. But other times when he had finished his ramblings he would stand there a moment as if there was something more he was thinking about saying. If James gave him a rather dour but questioning look at these times the man would smile, wave his hands about, and sway off. James would snort and mumble something about daft rum soaked pirates and go back to what he was doing. Their sleeping arrangements remained the same, James having the cabin to himself during the night and Jack using it sporadically throughout the day.

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James carefully sat up on the edge of the hammock, it had been quite a while since he had slept in one before this trip, and he had pretty much forgotten the technique for the safe use of such. Something that had been painfully brought back to him as he found himself more than once meeting the deck face first after turning over in his sleep or attempting to swing his legs over and sit up on the edge in the morning. It didn't take him long to remember why he had hated sleeping in the blasted things.

He washed, shaved, and dressed, then stepped out on the deck to find the sea around them shrouded in a semi-thick fog. Unlike most sailors James didn't mind the fog. Not being a superstitious man he never gazed into the swirling mass and saw ghosts or sea monsters or some other manner of abomination ready to attack. He saw a comforting blanket that for a few hours quieted every thing around him. Because of superstition any ships crew he had been around when enveloped in fog almost to a man became so quiet you could hear a pin drop, other than the creak and moan of the ship its self, which no doubt added to the superstitious nature of ships crews veiled in fog. Even James had to admit those simple and familiar sounds took on a surreal effect in the fog and if he were even the slightest bit prone to superstition could be turned into the aforementioned creatures and or abominations.

As he stood there by the rail watching the vaporous trails dance and swirl around in the thick mist surrounding them he blinked, then blinked again. He thought he had seen something moving. He shook his head and snorted, some of Sparrow's daftness must be rubbing off on him. He started to turn from the rail then turned back when he thought he saw that movement again out of the corner of his eye. He was sure he saw it now and strained his eyes to make some sense of it. A moment later it was all made clear. There was a ship coming out of the fog and bearing straight for them. He and the fellow aloft began shouting at the same time, "Ship off the larboard beam!" He turned to give the alarm again and saw Jack swaying quickly in his direction. James pointed the ship out and Jack made a moue, "Bugger!" Then turned and yelled, "Mr. Gibbs! AnnaMaria! I want those guns manned and loaded now! The rest of you scurrilous pieces of fish bait arm yerselves." He turned to James and with a flutter of his fingers and a jerk of his head towards the ship said, "French." Then in a tone as if he were scolding an errant child he said right before swaying off toward the wheel, "Commodore, ya might be wantin to arm yerself as well." James gave Jack's back a frown for a moment then when to find himself a weapon.

To Be Continued

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	9. Chapter 9

Just a Little Kidnapping Chapter 9a

Just a Little Kidnapping Chapter 9a

A/N- In this chapter / \\ denotes the speaker is speaking French, I apologize for my lax manner in not going and researching and finding the real French equivalents of these sentences but I guess we'll all learn to live with it.

Just a Little Kidnapping

Chapter 9

As James quickly made his way to the cabin to find a weapon the overpowering feelings of nervous excitation and tense anticipation, old friends when a battle was imminent, began to fill his mind. He did his best to control those feelings as he picked up a sword and pistol and headed back on deck.

Any of the officers and men who had ever served under James Norrington in battle would consider him one of the bravest men they had ever known, and on numerous occasions had voiced that opinion to the man himself. James did not consider himself in such a light, there were brave men but he was not one of them. He knew all too well how hard he battled within himself to keep control over the maelstrom of fear that threatened to take over during a battle. He knew he was not brave, he had just been able, at least so far, to keep any of those almost paralyzing emotions that tried to take over in those circumstances under control, and was fully aware that the next battle, or the battle after that might be the one in which his control faltered and the tables would be turned.

He felt the Pearl maneuvering for a better position and as he stepped on deck he heard Jack shouting orders from where he stood at the wheel. James looked over at the French ship and saw they too were going for position. So it appeared there would be an engagement between the two ships. He took a deep breath, straightened his back and shoulders and took his position at the rail with the rest of the men.

The two ships were broadside with each other about twenty feet or so apart now and the crews of both were lined up against the rails shouting curses and insults and threats back and forth, brandishing cutlass and dagger and pistol as each crew proclaimed what would be done to the opposing ship and crew. James saw the crews of both ships working themselves up into a frenzy and was a bit taken aback, no naval crew he had ever commanded would dare act in such a rash manner, then with a snort he mumbled to himself, 'pirate crew'.

He understood more than a little French, was able to speak the language passably, although his tutor Monsieur Renard, had often thrown his hands up in the air in despair at what he termed James' horrible accent and inflection, pronouncing him a lost cause, and declaring in that same tone and expression that absolutely shouted Monsieur Renard considered James a dullard, that James should never under any circumstances ever consider the career of ambassador regardless of what country that might include, judging James ability to pick up any foreign language a complete impossibility.

James surmised it had to be the tone the various curses and threats and insults were being tossed back and forth because it was doubtful the crew of the Pearl understood what was being shouted across the distance at them any more that the crew of the French ship understood what the Pearl's crew was shouting back at them. James knew it was only a matter of time, more than likely just a few minutes at that, and someone on one side or the other would become so filled with angry passion a shot would be fired and the fight would be on.

James saw Jack making his way to the rail where he jumped up on said rail and called out, "Oye there Etoile," The men on both ships quieted and stared at the sight of Jack balanced on the rail. Of course the attention he was now receiving from both ships was just too good an opportunity, and he began to sway perilously back and forth and wave the hand that was not holding onto the line about and smile that glittering smile. He called out to the other ship, / "Gentlemen, who is your Captain? I should like to have a word with him." \\ James was a bit surprised to hear him speaking French, his accent and inflection clearly indicating he had been taught by an educated person and had not just picked the language up in the taverns or brothels. James snorted a bit as he wondered what trials and tribulations Jack's tutor must have gone through, although that brought the thought to mind that person definitely had more success with Jack than his tutor had with him.

/"I am in charge of the Etoile."\\ A man standing by the rail called out.

/"Ah! Then you are the very one I would be wishing to speak to then."\\ Jack said as he fluttered his fingers at the man. / "You do, of course, know who I am?" \\

/ "I know what you are, you are a pirate." \\ the man replied looking at Jack like he was daft.

/"Ah, but not just any pirate mate, I'm Captain Jack Sparrow." \\ Jack finished with a grand flourish of his arm.

The man looked at him blankly, / "I have never heard of you." \\

Jack rocked back on the rail a bit almost falling off, a pouty expression taking over his face and tone, / "Captain Jack Sparrow mate, I know you must have heard of me… and me ship the Black Pearl?" \\

/ "I have never heard of this Captain Jack Sparrow you claim to be and I refuse to banter words back and forth with a lowly pirate." \\ With this statement he pulled a pistol from his waistband and fired it at Jack who fell unceremoniously to the deck, landing on his back.

James hurriedly stepped back from the rail looking to where Jack had fallen, thinking the shot must have hit him, but Jack was unhurt and already up on his feet.

"Alright you scurvy bunch of miscreants are ya just gonna stand there and let them bloody frogs shoot holes in yer Captain?"

Instantly the Pearl's crew was in action, shots were fired and grappling hooks were thrown. The next instant the crew of the Etoile were responding in the same manner. Men from both ships began swinging across to the opposing ship and the fight was on. James saw AnnaMaria and Mr. Gibbs swing over to the Etoile. He looked around and found Jack engaged in a sword fight and doing fine by himself. As Jack disabled the man he looked at James and with irritation called out, "Are ya just going ta stand there staring about Commodore or are ya gonna go help defend me Pearl?"

James snapped him a salute, grabbed a hold of one of the grappling lines and swung across to the Etoile. He was immediately confronted by two of the Etoile's hands and dispatched them just as a third joined into the fray. He had little time from then on to do anything but defend himself as sailor after sailor crossed swords with him. He had lost count of how many men he had fought, and lost track of time as well. As he finally managed to get the best of the man he was fighting he glanced around to see the crew of the Pearl aboard the Etoile had gained the upper hand and most of the Etoile's crew was surrendering.

The man he had just fought was lying on the deck, James' sword at his throat. As AnnaMaria stalked over and jerked the man off the deck and dragged him away to join the rest they had gathered by the bow he cast a quick perusing glance to the Pearl and found the situation there much the same, most of the Etoile's crew huddled together in a bunch near the forecastle and being held there by some of the Pearl's crew. He saw Jack smile at him and flutter a hand in motion for him to return, James re-sheathed his sword and swung back over to the Pearl.

As he approached Jack smiled a wide glittering smile and flopped his hands about and wiggled his fingers in James' face.

"By the expression yer wearin I'm thinkin this little melee may have gone a bit of the way to fulfillin the wishes of the bonny lass for ya ta enjoy yerself Commodore."

"What on earth would give you such an impression?" James asked as he peered, eyebrows raised, at Jack.

"That smile ya'd presently be gracin yer face with Commodore." Jack replied. James realized he was smiling and did feel a bit of exhilaration from the fight, but frowned at Jack anyway and let out a 'hrumph' in reply. Ignoring James Jack paused a moment tapping his chin with an air of considering something as a few 'hums' left his mouth, then looking at James he said, "Ya don't suppose she arrange…….." James rolled his eyes and gave Jack an 'Oh please' look. Jack paused as he reconsidered, "No I don't suppose even she is capable of somefin like this."

He turned towards the companionway and called back over his shoulder as he swayed off, "Care ta join me for some rum in the galley Commodore? I'd say we both deserve it."

James rolled his eyes again but began to follow and almost ran into Jack as he stopped suddenly and whirled around wavinghis arms about, "Gentlemen of the Etoile, you shall remember this as the day that you finally had the fortuitously good fortune of meeting Captain Jack Sparrow!" As he once again started for the companionway he called out to Mr. Cotton, and Mr. Cotton's parrot, "Return these feculent maggoty bilge rats to their ship. Tell AnnaMaria and Mr. Gibbs ta make sure 'n disable their ship, something that will take them a bit to repair, and then get us back on course."

Mr. Cotton nodded and Mr. Cotton's parrot squawked in reply as Jack headed off for the galley.

To Be Continued

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	10. Chapter 10

Just a Little Kidnapping

Chapter 10

"We've returned the Etoile's crew ta their ship Cap'n and we're back on our headin." Mr. Gibbs said poking his head into the galley where Jack sat drinking, and James sat sipping mugs of rum.

"Ah very good Mr. Gibbs." Jack said with a smile and a flop of his hands.

Mr. Gibbs added, "Should be quite a voyage for 'em. We was just gonna disable their rudder chain 'cept a couple o 'em felt the need ta insult AnnaMaria, though naught what they had ta say wasn't the truth of the matter." Mr. Gibbs looked over his shoulder then back at Jack and James and in a whisper said, "Don't tell her I said that." After determining AnnaMaria was not about and ready to take him to task for his statement he went on, "Got it inta her head it might sooth her injured sensibilities ta be knowin some of 'em would have ta be bailin water as they made their way back ta wherever it is they're gonna be able ta make it back to. Put a mighty fine leak in their ship she did." Joshamee shook his head with a bit of disbelief as he continued, "Never realize ya could do that much damage ta a ship with a dagger, course I guess it's all in the determination of the person doin the hackin, she was awful fired up." As he turned to leave he shook his head again, "Tried ta explain ta them boys it was bad luck ta piss her off. I'd lay me shiny on the fact they're wishin now they'd a listened."

Jack stared at Mr. Gibbs, and then where Mr. Gibbs had been standing for a moment or two, his eyebrows raised, and then with a shake of his head he turned his attention to James, "So Commodore, how does bein a pirate feel?"

James frowned and snapped, "I am not a _pirate_."

Jack smiled as he leaned forward, waved his hand around, and wiggled his fingers at James, "Ah but the facts of the matter do indeed differ with your somewhat clearly muddied up determinin of the facts of the matter and yer very unrealistic and entirely undefendable opinion and or assessment of the matter Commodore. You did, in fact, just assist a pirate crew in the act of attacking another ship. That assistance including, but not necessarily being limited to, subduing and or disabling said crew of that ship and in the doing of that assisting allowing said pirate crew to remove certain items of interest from said ship, among which just happens to be the rum you are now ingesting and or drinking by the way. Seems ta me all them undeniable facts added up would go quite a bit of the way ta set ya right in the midst of bein and or possessin certain perhaps deeply buried yet rather awesomely excellent piratical tendencies."

James frowned at the mug in front of him, then looked at Jack, "That does not make me a pirate."

"Don't make ya a shinin and finely upright and stuffy example of the Royal Navy now either does it?" Jack said with a wink and a flutter of his fingers.

James let out a snort, started to lift the mug to his lips, set it back down, then with another snort lifted it and took a drink. He stiffened his posture and in as much of a Commodore-ly tone as he could muster said. "I hardly surmise my superiors will have reason to censure my actions if those actions were in deed brought before them regardless of me being aboard a pirate ship or a Naval vessel. That ship attacked first, and therefore my answering acts would be judged as purely self-defense and totally within reason." James said though his tone belied a certain lack in his belief in what he had just said.

Jack smiled, winked, and fluttered his fingers at James again as he said, "And here I always thought ya lacked any manner of imagination at all Commodore Pirate."

James glared at Jack, "Do not call me that."

Jack winked again, "Very well, I shall do me best not ta be callin ya that again mate."

"Do not call me that either." James snapped and took another drink of rum.

Jack gave a faux grimace, "Never met anyone so bloody particular bout the form of addressin used by others in the addressin of 'em. Proly be resortin ta just shoutin Hey you afore long."

"Indeed." James snipped, then added with a bit of snark, "By all means you may try that _Captain_ and see what it gets you in return." He had a smile twitching at the corners of his mouth as he raised his mug to his lips.

Jack mumbled to himself as he raised his own mug, "Bloody Navy toff."

Despite his and Jacks recently ended 'conversation' James soon found himself once again in a good mood as they sat there in the galley. Whether this was due to the rum he was drinking or the lasting effects of the successful skirmish with the French ship, he didn't take the time to analyze, just enjoyed and continued to partake of the rum.

They heard a fiddle tuning up as well as a pipe. Jack smiled and finished his mug. He stood up and grabbed two bottles of rum from the sideboard, putting one in his pocket and uncorking the other and taking a swig, "Ah! The celebration must be about to commence Commodore, would you care to join in?"

James straightened up from where he had been slouched in his chair, as he stood up to follow Jack on deck he said, "I've already joined in an act of piracy, might as well enjoy the celebration of such as well." Right before following Jack out the door he reached over and grabbed his own bottle of rum.

As they stepped on deck Jack patted James on the back, ignored the look James shot him at the contact, and pointed to the bow of the Pearl, "I'm thinkin ya might enjoy this a bit Commodore, Mr. Rush there is a fine pipe player, and Mr. Bloom does a fine job on the fiddle as well." He nodded his head at the spot where the crew were gathering together, "Shall we?"

"Oh by all means." With a hand gesture and a smirk he said, "After you _Captain_."

Jack gave him a dubious look, "Not sure I want ya behind me Commodore."

"I very seldom attack from behind Sparrow. And if I were to attack you I assure you _you will see it coming_." James gave him a snarky smile then walked off toward the bow and found a seat on a barrel a short way from the main crowd.

Jack gave James' back a frown before following over to the group of deckhands.

James had uncorked the bottle of rum, and was just about to take a drink when one or two at a time the crew, a bit warily at first but soon getting over that, came over to shake his hand and congratulate him on his fine fighting skills he had displayed earlier. He thanked each in turn; sure his face was showing every bit of the surprise he was feeling.

The pipe and the fiddle started playing and James looked over to see Sparrow in the middle of the crowd, and soon heard him begin to sing a song he was sure he had heard before. After a few moments of consideration he recognized it as the song the then young Miss Swann had sung, and been scolded by her Father, on numerous occasions on their crossing from England. As he sipped at the bottle of rum in his hands he had to admit to himself the pirate was a fine singer. The man didn't have an overly powerful singing voice, but James found the timbre of it quite pleasing. James found the antics the man engaged in while singing quite another manner altogether. He leaned back against the rail and looked skyward as he sipped from his rum and listened to the sound of the pipe, the fiddle and the singer, and found them to be quite acceptable. He snorted as he caught himself thinking this, then snarked out loud to himself in a low tone, 'Careful James or you'll find yourself casting off your Commodore's brocade and braid for the dress of a pirate."

To Be Continued

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	11. Chapter 11

Just a Little Kidnapping

Chapter 11

James awoke to a headache, a queasy stomach, and someone nudging him in the side with the toe of their boot. As James cracked one of his eyes open and tried to blearily focus on the shape looming over him he found that someone was Sparrow. He groaned and rolled over out of reach of the boot.

"Ah, none o that," Jack said as he crouched down next to James and began shaking the man by the shoulder, "Don't allow no one, Commodore or not, ta be layin around me deck no matter how much rum they've had the night before.

With a huff James raised his head and with eyes still bloodshot from too much rum he peered around the deck finding quite a few others lying around the deck, then did his best to glare at Jack. "Go bother them Sparrow."

"I'm thinking that wouldn't be near as much fun now would it. Come along Commodore, Cook has a fine breakfast fixed and will be sorely disappointed if we don't partake of it." Jack said as he grasp James' arm and began tugging.

James had had no intention of getting up; unfortunately all the jostling around by Sparrow caused his stomach to send a message exactly the opposite. He lurched to his feet and barely made it to the rail before what was left of said stomach's contents came spewing out. He took a few deep breaths as he continued to lean over the rail for a few moments to make sure his stomach was satisfied and would now settle down. He straightened up a little, testing to see if his stomach, at least for the moment, was indeed settled. Looking around for something to wipe his mouth on, and finding no other alternatives handy, with a slight grimace he wiped the sleeve of his shirt across his mouth and turned to face Sparrow, "Would this _cook _of yours happen to have tea?"

Jack's expression as he looked at James became a bit puzzled. He tipped his head to the side and tapped his chin, "That's a very good question Commodore, never had the occasion ta be askin him for tea ya see, me bein whom I in fact am and as such bein a bit or as it were more than a bit more partial towards the stronger spirits and even more specifically speakin that stronger spirit in fact bein rum. But be that as it may what say you we be off and hopefully find a hopefully satisfactorily satisfyin answer to your query?"

James rolled his eyes a bit then motioned with his hand for Jack to lead on.

The aroma as they entered the galley almost made James head for the rail once again. Not that the mingling odors should be unpleasant in any way, on any other day James would probably have found them quite mouth watering. But this morning they were making his mouth water for an entirely, and most unpleasantly different reason. He forced himself to go over and sit down on one of the benches along side a table, and leaned his head in his hands. Jack swayed over and with a slap on James' back said cheerily, "Now that _was_ tea ya was wantin me ta be checkin on Commodore?"

James gave him a moan in reply, and Jack smiled at the Commodore's back as he cheerily stated, "Right then, I'll just be off about inquirin after that very thing, less ya would be carin ta go make the inquiry yerself Commodore?"

James gave a half hearted shooing motion with his hand and Jack's smile grew, "I'll just take that as a no shall I Commodore?" and he swayed off missing the second half hearted shooing motion James made that surely would have made his smile grow even more.

Jack returned a few minutes later with a steaming cup of tea for James and a steaming plate of food for himself. He walked over opposite James and sat down. He slid the cup of tea over in front of James and then began on his plate of food.

"Must you do that?" James huffed.

Jack gave him a questioning look even though James still had his head bent over the cup of tea breathing in the steam, and was not looking at him. "Do what?"

"Eat." James replied snippily.

"I'm thinking here that yes I really must Commodore, wouldn't want me ta be wastin away ta nothin so to speak and in order ta avoid that whole entirely unacceptably unacceptable situation and all associated unacceptable complications from such leadin to what would no doubt be a rather unacceptably gruesome happenstance I'm feeling that eatin is a bit of an essentially essential and wise thing ta in fact be doin, at least in me own opinion…… as well as more 'n a few others that might be expressin an opinion on such matters no doubt." Jack said with much hand waving and finger fluttering.

"Well must you do it in such a boisterous manner……and so close to me?" James snapped back.

"Captain!" Jack said pointing to himself with his fork. As James raised his head a bit and green eyes glared at him Jack gave a pouty look at James, took a hold of his plate with one hand and put the other, still holding his fork, up in front of his nose and began to scoot down the table away from James, "Guess when one stops to ponder the possibly impendin and not inconsequential and in fact totally uncalled for and violent tendencies that a certain person might have about and or for a certain other person's choice in eatin spots and in fact the one certain person might see it as a reason to act out with little or no advanced notice against a certain other person involved for the act of occupyin a certain eatin spot then one might come to the conclusion that one eatin spot is as good as another, aye?"

"Indeed!" James snapped and bent his head back over his tea.

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Although the hangover had put a bit of a damper on his good mood, as it subsided the good mood returned. James spent the next three or four days enjoying the feel of scurrying up the rigging and helping with the sails, along with other necessary tasks aboard the Pearl. For the first time in years James was in bed with, or shortly after the sunset, and slept soundly throughout the night. And although he wasn't aware of it many others aboard were, especially Jack, that now most any time you glanced in his direction you would see either the beginnings of a smile playing at the edges of his mouth, or you would encounter an all out 'I am enjoying myself to no end' wide open smile.

One evening after supper James was headed for the rail to gaze out at the horizon, as he stepped out on deck he paused, noticing Jack leaning against the rail. Jack turned toward him as if he sensed his presence. Waving his hands about he smiled and said, "Ah Commodore, join me."

James walked over and leaned on the rail beside Jack. Still smiling at James Jack pointed up, "See anything interestin there Commodore?"

As he started to look up he said, "I always find things of interest whenever I contemplate the heavens Captain."

"Ah but I think if ya look closely ya might begin to understand my question."

James gave the man a glance before turning his eyes towards the sky. He stood there for a moment, looked over at Jack, looked back up, then back at Jack. "We are headed back aren't we?"

"Ah ye've caught on much more quickly than I'd thought or given ya credit for Commodore."

"I should have noticed before." James said more to himself than Jack.

"But ya see James, ya've been so intent on the enjoyment of what ya've been doin aboard me Pearl lately that it's understandable ya would have overlooked it." Jack paused and in a more serious tone went on, leaning into James' face and pointing his index fingers at James, "Now the question is Commodore, are ya gonna remember this experience and the enjoyment ya derived from it once ya get back ta that stuffy little cell ya call an office and that mountain of parchment ya call duty. Ya do in fact have a duty to yerself Commodore than should include more than the aforementioned."

James looked off at the horizon for several minutes, a thoughtful expression on his face. His gaze lingered on the horizon as he began to speak, "I will admit I have had the tendency to focus a bit too strongly on my duty and career, a fact that may have cost me a fine wife." He paused for an instant, a shadow of sadness and regret crossing his face, then continued, "I shall endeavor not to fall so far into that behavior again, although my duty will always be the most important thing in my life." Then turning toward Jack, a smile flittering at the corners of his lips, "You do understand that regardless of any change in my attitude and actions towards certain duties and responsibilities in my life I might make I shall always continue to act in a manner that I feel follows the right and proper course."

"Aye." Jack replied briefly, sensing the man was not done with his statement yet but not sure where it was going.

"And in following that right and proper course might in fact act and or speak in a manner that would be less than pleasing to certain persons involved." James said, his smile slowly growing as he spoke.

Jack gave James a nod and a wink, having caught on to what James was leading up to, "Yer gonna give the bonny lass what for when ya get back."

"I am indeed going to give her _what for_." James said in a very satisfied tone.

"Well can't blame ya for that Commodore. Been a time or two I've strongly thought on doin the very same thing, and more 'n likely would have come to that if she'd actually had me kidnapped or such, although when dealing with Lizzie the better option is almost always ta just sail away." Jack replied with a smile and a flutter of fingers. Jack turned around and spotting Mr. Gibbs called out, "I'm thinkin we need to be proceedin with all haste here Mr. Gibbs, seems the fine Commodore has important business back in Port Royal."

"Aye Cap'n." Mr. Gibbs replied and went about giving the orders to the men.

As they stood by the rail, feeling the Pearl pick up speed Jack spoke, "So ya know you'll need yer fine speech of comeuppance all ready afore ya broadside the bonny lass wif it, otherwise she'll have ya twisted around her finger for ya know what's happened to ya."

James smiled a rather mischievous smile, "I think in this case actions will speak louder than words Captain Sparrow."

Jack raised an eyebrow and looked at James a bit warily, "Actions?"

"Yes, as in turn about is fair play." James replied looking very smug.

Jack rocked back on his heels and threw his hands up in a defensive motion, a look of shocked horror on his face, "Oh no

Commodore, I'll not have that…..that….Lizzie on my ship for even so much as a quick sail around the harbor!"

Still looking smug and a bit deviously piratey James replied, "Indeed. Well I suppose we will have to see about that now will we not."

"Bugger!" Jack replied.

The End

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