Dark Angel 1. Chapter 1

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Raw Emotions

Chapter 1

Spoilers: Berrisford Agenda, Love among the Runes, Freak Nation. 

Disclaimer: Dark Angel and its characters belong to James Cameron, and whoever is also involved with the making of the television series

Summary: Alec died saving the person he loved. Now Rachel, Max and the rest of the gang have to cope with their loss. The transgenics now must face a war without Alec, Biggs and Cece. They were all prepared, ready to win this war against White and their enemies, ready to face the world with open arms, and fight for their freedom. But nothing could prepare them for what White had in store for them. 

Authors Note: This is the Sequel to 'Hidden Emotions' so I recommend you to read that story before you read this story. 

***

She had been running for what seemed like hours, her legs were stiff, and she had a cramp in her side. Still she kept running, never daring to stop. Beads of sweat collected on her brow, her breathing was labored and all she could do was keep running in fear of what was behind her. She never dared to look back, and although she wished she could to make sure Alec was all right, she knew somehow that she just had to keep going. Her wavy brown hair flew behind her as she tried her hardest to keep up her pace.

Alas, her fatigue had kicked in and she slowed to a stop. Only to collapse on the ground below her. Rachel tried to regulate her breathing, and calm her speeding pulse. As she did so, Rachel got slowly on her feet, ignoring the pain that shot up and down her legs as she did so. She dragged her tired body towards the paved road that laid only meters away. Her throat was dry, as she silently called for water. Her exhaustion had taken over, she fainted to the ground seeing nothing but black.

***

Rachel could vaguely remember collapsing onto the ground from pure fatigue. Yet it hadn't explained the fact that she was lying on fabric covered seats, and that she could feel herself moving. She slowly opened her deep ochre eyes, and found herself lying on the backseat of a king cab truck. Slowly and painfully she seated herself in a seated position. "Hello." Rachel greeted her voice quiet. The man driving appeared to have blond hair underneath his blue baseball cap. His muscular arm came up giving her a short wave hello. "Thank you." She said meaningfully. She saw his head bob up and down in a single nod of acknowledgement, and then threw her a bottle of Evian bottled water. Rachel accepted it gratefully, as she drank all of the contents within, letting the cool liquid revitalize her.

"Where you headed?" She watched his cobalt eyes glance towards her in the rearview mirror. "Seattle." His reply was blunt and to the point. She sighed in relief; she was going home. No conversation was made as they headed towards home, and she soon found herself counting the houses they passed out of sheer boredom.   


***

During the time getting home she had dozed off, and dreamt about the events that happened not so long ago. 

__

Her blindfold was tied too tight the smell of mildew invaded her nostrils, and the sound of dripping water was nearby. All she knew was she was alone somewhere damp, and cold. She didn't know who had kidnapped her, but somehow she knew it had some relation with Alec. Then she heard a man's voice; the voice she assumed was the kidnappers."Well, well, well, 494 how nice of you to join us." Rachel could have smiled as she heard Alec's voice mix into conversation. "Like hell I'm here to join you! I'm getting Rachel out of this place… That is after I kill you for kidnapping her." "Bold words." The kidnapper replied. Then she heard the sound of flesh on flesh, as she imagined Alec beating up the kidnapper whom remained faceless. And then she heard nothing, but footsteps coming towards her. Someone had untied her binds, and taken her hand. For a brief moment his eyes met hers, as his eyes penetrated hers she could see the relief within them, and somehow she knew that everything was going to be okay. 

They had taken to running, and they both ran towards a grass field. It had looked like they were home free, but as they caught sight of the fence a soldier stood in front. A gun was pointed to Alec's chest; the soldier was about to pull the trigger as she grabbed the gun from his hand. "No!" She yelled as she attempted to get the gun from the soldier. He just swung her aside, and she hit the ground with a thud. Alec took this opportunity to push the soldier in the fence; he turned his head to her. "Run! Get out of here! I'll be okay I promise. Just get out of here! Please!" Alec desperately tried to get her to go to safety. She soon complied with a slight nod and she was gone over the fence and running toward home. As she ran towards home she heard the sound of thunder claim the sky. She was tempted to turn back to make sure Alec was okay, but her fear drove her on.

Rachel's eyes shot open, her breathing was rugged, and she had been sweating. She replayed his voice in her head _"Run! Get out of here! I'll be okay I promise…" _"Alec…" she whispered as a single tear slid from her eye.

***

"We're here." A male voice stated. He opened the back door to let Rachel out. Rachel looked up at the man in front of her. It was the first time she had actually gotten to look at the man who had basically saved her life. His blond tresses of hair blew freely with the night breeze without his navy blue cap, his eyes were dark as the street lights were the only thing that lit the broken street, he was ruggedly handsome; he was utterly chiseled to perfection. She let a small smile pass, as he held out her hand. "Thank you, for all you've done." He took her hand in his and briefly shook it, letting go as he told her he had to be on his way. Rachel thanked him again, and turned from him walking towards the Berrisford mansion… daddy was probably worried sick about her.

TBC…

Author's Note: I know I said I wasn't going to write a sequel… but I have nothing better to do… so that's the beginning. Tell me what you think! _~ Inevitable_


	2. Chapter 2

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Chapter 2

***

Darkness engulfed the skies of Seattle. A cool wind whipped through her hair, as she sat upon the space needle. It had been almost two days, and Alec still hadn't come back. It only meant one thing; he was gone… She let a few tears squeeze past her closed eyes. No matter how annoying, and how much of a dumb ass he was, she'd still miss him. In some way she loved the guy, and she'd admit it too. He was a part of her; he was her brother. Sure they hadn't grown up together, but somehow he had warmed his way into her heart. She had herself convinced that she wanted him out of her life and, that he wasn't worth anything. But she realized that he was as lost as she was, and he was nothing like her brother Ben. Although his appearance reminded her of Ben, and the sacrifice and pain… all Alec had to do was open his mouth and utter a few words. Max smirked at the thought. She knew that if Alec didn't have a heart he wouldn't have saved Rachel, she was safe… or at least that was what the news had said, somehow Max knew that Alec was behind it; she knew he had saved Rachel. That was the way she was going to remember him, as a hero.

***

It had been a couple days since his arrival in Seattle. It had been a long drive, somewhere in his subconscious told him to come here. To seek the one named Max, for some unknown reason she was the key. Maybe the key to unlock his past, and figure out who Adam really was. 

Things just didn't add up when he was working at the farm with Buddy. The things that Buddy had told him just didn't seem relevant. Most of all he didn't remember a thing. When he was leaving the hospital he thought that maybe if he saw something familiar it would all come back, but that wasn't the case. 

Months after the accident, or so that's what Buddy called it. Adam had been having strange dreams. Dreams so vivid he could remember the taste, scent, and touch of the objects he encountered. He would wake up fully alert and gasping for air. Then he became more aware that somehow he was different. He could hear things that were miles away, see things that no normal person could see with their naked eye. It didn't take much effort for any of the chores that were done at the farm. He soon found his hidden abilities to do almost everything, and found as he watched the news that most the descriptions of transgenics named matched him. 

Then one day while he was stacking hay, he remembered her face. The one of the young woman he had seen at the hospital, and then placed it with the one of a child a girl with a buzz cut… Max. He knew even before he placed her name to a face that she lived in Seattle. That was where he was going as he hijacked Buddy's white Chevy truck, more specifically where all the transgenics were… Terminal City. He was determined that once he got there he would find some answers. Tomorrow bright and early he was to go to Terminal City and retrieve his past.

***

Another day had gone by, and her hope of Alec returning was diminishing by the second. Logan had tried to reassure her, she commended him for trying but it was no help. It was just her and Joshua now, sure they had Logan, Cindy, Sketchy and the transgenics. But it was their little family of Joshua, Alec and Max that she found she missed. However, through the loss of Biggs, Cece, and Alec, she had found the determination to win the war for their freedom. She had come to the conclusion that they would win, if not for her then for them… for Alec. She would find the one that she was sure was the cause of Alec's death and make Ames White suffer. 

The transgenics around her had already begun to make preparations of the inevitable battle, the battle that would determine their freedom. It was only a matter of time before the humans would strike, and she had a feeling that it was going to be soon. Max knew from all the training that she went through in Manticore and a few tricks she learned along the road, that she was more than prepared to kick some ass… But all the preparations in the world wouldn't prepare her for who was going to come through the doors of Terminal City at that moment.

TBC…

Authors Note: well there's Chapter 2… I know it's short… I'd like some feedback! And while I'm trying to write the next chapter go to my site and join my clique! http://inevitabl3.cjb.net 


	3. Chapter 3

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Chapter 3

He walked in unscathed avoiding any sector police as well as any authorities. As he was about to enter through the gates in the heart of Terminal City he stopped suddenly to the sound of clicking… the sound of guns getting ready to fire. Adam instinctively looked up to the roof of the buildings beside him, and saw transgenics pointing shotguns at him. He stood still no knowing what to do, "I'm not the enemy." He stated. "I'm one of you." A transgenic that appeared to be the leader stepped up and looked him over. "Show me your barcode." Adam lifted his blonde locks of hair and showed him his barcode. The transgenic looked him up and down, then shoved his gun into Adam's chest. "If you try anything you'll be dead in a matter of seconds." Adam looked at him keeping his emotions in check, and nodded once. The transgenic waved his hand to the others, signaling that the gates were to be opened. "Welcome to Terminal City." A transgenic said as he helped open the gate and Adam stumbled in as he was being shoved in from behind. 

Inside he found a community, a huge community working together preparing for what was to come. He found, as he looked around transgenics, all of them different. Some looked like him like a human and others had abnormalities. He sighed as he took his first step into their society. Then as he scanned the main room he found a young woman staring at him. Adam looked at her too, confused at first but then realized that she was the one he had come to Seattle for. She was Max. 

Adam started to walk towards her, as she stood up. "Zack?" Max whispered in uncertainty. "Is that really you?" "My name isn't Zack, it's Adam." He corrected. "I'm here looking for answers, and I know that you can give them to me."

***

They had sat silently watching the sun set upon what was known as Terminal City. No words were spoken between them as if each were contemplating on what they were to say to one another. Not one of the two individuals sitting upon the roof of that abandoned building made an attempt to start any conversation. Though it was silence, it was not one of awkwardness, but a comfortable silence. It was, as words were not needed, for the silence expressed almost all they needed to know. 

Adam Thomson knew he knew this young woman sitting beside him, he knew that in someway they were close… how close he didn't know, but close nonetheless. This silence was driving him nuts, he was here to talk and find the past he left behind not sit around and stare off into space. He sighed loudly, not knowing whether it would be better or not to find out about whom he was before. 

"About your past…" Max had broken the silence with a whisper. "Yes?" Adam wanted her to go on. Maybe he was finally going to get his answers. "You were my brother, my commanding officer, my family." She had said that last statement nearly in tears. Yet she went on. "We were part of a government experiment to make the perfect soldiers, and we are it. We lived in a place called Manticore and we escaped for our freedom, but you are the only one who knows where everyone is." Adam's eyes urged her to go on. "Tell me what happened to me before I became Adam." Max sighed, her sigh full of emotion, he could see her blinking fast as to not let the tears fall. "When we went to bring Manticore down with our brother and sister Krit and Syl, you and I got captured. I got shot by a transgenic and to save me you gave me your heart." A tear fell down her cheek. "They told me that you were dead Zack! And then renfro took me to see you… it was horrible! They said that they were shipping you off somewhere, and I couldn't bear to look anymore. Then the next time I saw you was after I escaped and burnt Manticore to a crisp." She looked up at him her eyes glazed over with tears. Adam looked at her, and closed the space between them in a tight embrace. "Logan showed me a surveillance video and there you were. I found you but there was something different about you, and you wanted to kill Logan. So when you lost your memory again we made arrangements for you to become Adam Thomson and work with Buddy on his farm." 

Adam let her go and looked at her, processing the information he was just given. "So you thought that this was arrangement was going to be better for him… for me?" Max only nodded. His eyes lost the warm glow they once had, instead they were aflame with anger. "You thought that me not knowing exactly who I was, was a good thing? Do you know how it is for you to look at someone knowing that you should know them but don't? Do you know what it's like to one-day wake up and find you have hidden abilities. Abilities that no normal human would have? You don't know how much pain you caused me. How could you have done this? How?" Max looked at him in surprise; somehow she thought that he would have understood why she had done what she did. "I thought that is was the right thing to do at the time." "No you didn't, from the way you talk about that Logan guy and what people around hear say about him and you, it just seems to me that you just wanted to protect him and that's all you wanted. Do you know how it is when someone you love looks at you in fear?" "No." Max whispered in reply. "No. Well I do!" His expression softened. "Max, I loved her… I can't forget her face when she saw my barcode and realized who I was. It broke my heart to see her running away from me, seeing her afraid of me. I blame you… I blame you and Logan for doing this to me. Things could have been different, but all you cared about was yourself. Do you know what its like to not know who the hell you are? I'm not Zack but I'm not Adam either." Max looked at him tears trailing down her cheeks. "I'm sorry." She whispered, it was all she could say. "Sorry? Well sorry doesn't cut it!" 

Adam sighed as he got up from his seat and headed to the door leading to a staircase going down to ground level. He looked back at Max, his face held once again an expressionless mask like the one Zack used to wear. "Suck it up soldier." His voice took on a commanding tone, and softened as he said the next statement. "I know I have." With that he went down the flight of stairs. 

Max watched as he turned his back to her and fled down the stairs. She didn't blame him for being angry after he heard that part of the truth. She understood now more than ever how much she was wrapped up about the not being able to touch Logan thing. She hadn't realized the consequences of her actions, and now Zack or Adam had to pay the price of her incompetence. Nonetheless dwelling on the past wasn't a good thing and Zack was right she had to suck it up and be the soldier she was born to be… this was a war and there was no place for cry babies.

TBC…

Authors Note: Sorry for the long awaited chapter! 


	4. Chapter 4

Chapter 4

Gun drawn, metal gleaming in the sunlight, the cold metal pressing into his chest.  The sound erupted and rang in his ears as he felt pain pierce throughout him; it was the pain that originated within his chest, where the bullet hole showed evidence of why he was here.  It was dark when he was finally revived by his mind numbing pain.  His blue-green eyes widened for he saw his enemy, and remembering his thorough training… he made himself forget.

***

All he could hear was the sound that was emitted by the gun that had fired, the sound echoed within his mind, and he wondered if he was going insane.  Yet as his head pounded from the intense torture he still made himself forget what had mattered to him the most.  It had been days, or so he thought as he had lost count as to how long he had been there.  

Soon after, he had withdrawn himself completely, losing all traces of who he had been before.  He knew before he had wiped his memory clean that his memory was never lost, but kept deep within, in the dark crevasses of his mind, where nothing could penetrate and no one would find out unless he told. 

His hands gripped the metal armrests, his knuckles turning white.  The pressure was too intense as the images pierced his soul.  He had done what had to be done, what he was trained to do.  The soldier had forgotten everything he had seen in the outside world, all that was left was a cold empty shell.  He was no longer resisting the torturous weapons the enemy was utilizing.  Yet he could feel any rational thoughts slowly slipping away, and was soon replaced with murderous orders to seek and destroy.  He was finally ready, ready to take on the people he once thought as allies, the people he had learned to love and become accustomed to as if they were family.  He was no longer their family, he may look like the man that was part of their family, but he had completely changed his frame of mind and now he was their enemy.  He was fatal, and the only emotion on his face was that of a soldier, a mask, and emotionless.  

The soldier even walked different, as if he was stiff and unable to bend.  His posture was not one of a friendly, but rigid and ready to pounce on prey.  He was the predator, and they were the prey… he was no longer the one being hunted down and cowering in fear.  Before his transformation he had always wondered why they had stayed and obeyed those that were inferior.  Yet now he was still obeying them, obeying his once enemy but now he was his enemy's soldier, his pawn to get what the man wanted, and he didn't care, all he cared about was fulfilling his mission, and getting rid of the images that drowned his mind.  

He knew that the images that had been shown to him the ones of his enemy, and that raged him on, as he wanted the pictures to stop playing in his mind.  It was like they were the only things he was able to think about, and all he wanted was to get rid of them.  Getting rid of them was the only plausible way to get rid of them.  The images that radiated within his mind drove him to near insanity and for that he learned to hate the people in them, it took all of his training to keep from screaming out of frustration and keeping his expression neutral.

***

An old rusted metal door was all that shielded him away from that of his orders.   The dark room had no light fixtures, and had only a cot that was situated at the back of the room.  He supposed that this was his barracks and that he was to be called to complete his mission.  The soldier stood restlessly awaiting the people that had been walked towards his barracks, the loud footsteps had stopped and he saw the shadow underneath the door.  

The door creaked open, and his first instinct was to stand ramrod straight and salute the man that stood in front of him.   The man nodded at him and waved his hand gesturing him to follow.   Only then as he stepping into the lit hallway did he notice that his gray shirt was covered with dry blood.  He kept walking following the shorter man in front into another room that was blinding white.  Inside the room a mirror stretched the length of the right wall, and in the center was a table, and two chairs were situated across from one another.  "Sit down," The commanding officer stated.  The soldier only complied with the order and sat in the chair across from the man that was wearing a suit and tie.  "This little meeting is to discuss the mission you will be on," The man spoke.  "Oh and before I begin with the details, 494 you better not screw up."

TBC…

Authors Note: I've updated the story, I didn't know how the story should go but I've ended up going along this note.    I hope you like.  I'd like some feedback so please review!


	5. Chapter 5

Chapter 5 

Life had grown almost back to normal for her.  She had learned her lesson and her guard was always up.  Still she had one question circulating within her mind.  Why wasn't the man that had saved her contacting her?  Though she knew the answer, she wouldn't let herself believe it.  

He had tried to stay away from her when she had finally found him again.  Okay so she hadn't found him, he did.  It didn't matter because he had tried to keep his distance, and she had always tried to get closer.  Somehow though, he managed to drive a wedge between them and she was heartbroken when he told her it was best that he didn't see her again.  When she had found out who he really was she was shaken at first but then, it made her realize just how much more she loved him.  It made her see the strength in him, an explanation of his childish antics, and why he hadn't felt love before.  That especially made her love him more than she had already, the fact that he chose her to love.  

She sighed as she sat upon a balcony chair, and rested her head on her arms as she looked out into the morning sky.  Her chestnut brown tresses of hair blew gently with the wind, her ochre eyes twinkled as the suns rays hit at a certain angle.  The sky shown a brilliant blue and the birds chirped happily, until a couple of dark crows sat among the branches and covered the beauty over with their evil song. 

 "Rachel," A voice behind her said. "There you are."  She turned shaken from her reverie; she hadn't even heard her father walk in.  "Hi daddy."  The elderly man only smiled as he took a seat beside her.  He took in a deep breath of fresh air, "It's a beautiful morning huh?"  "Yeah it is."  Robert sighed, "I know Simon saved you."  Rachel glanced at her father surprised, she hadn't told a soul about Alec rescuing her.  "I didn't tell you that."  "The camera's picked him up on our premises, then you turn up within hours of him being here, I only assumed."  "Oh."  She only whispered her reply.  "I know he loves you Rachel, but you must understand why I feel the way I do… I hope that you won't see him again."  Rachel looked at her father, her eyes wide, and surprise shown in every aspect of her face. "But daddy!"  "Please Rachel I just," He sighed.  "I just don't want you seeing him anymore, he could put you in terrible danger again… I just don't want to lose you."  Then he got up, unable to hold his composure and left not saying another word.

Rachel sat, and stared out at the world before her; the world that wasn't locked away within the Berrisford Gates, but the real outside where people roamed free.  She knew exactly why her father tried to forbid her to see Alec again; she knew what Alec had done to her, and what could happen if she continued her chasing.  But she was like a young schoolgirl, and all she wanted was to be with him… She loved him.  It wasn't wrong that he wanted to stay away, yet his attempts to keep distance between them only made her more determined to be with him.  If he was going to stay away he wouldn't have saved her, and wouldn't have approached her those many times, and her heart jumped with joy as she finally realized that he didn't really want to stay away.  That he really did love her and all he was doing was trying to protect her, and that he did very well.  Her mind however kept wondering what had happened when that thundering sound erupted into the afternoon sky, she wanted to know what had happened… wanted to know what had come of Alec.  

The horrible thoughts that she had tried to drive away only tore her apart.  If Alec were the one that had gotten hit by the bullet, would he be gone now?  Had he been captured?  If White had treated Rachel the way he did, than what would come of Alec if he were under Whites supervision?  Questions circulated within her mind and all she wanted was an answer, a sign that he was actually okay. 

 She could feel her blazing hatred for the man that called himself White, and from what she heard of the conversation between Alec and him they weren't fond of each other.  She knew without a doubt that Alec hated White, and she didn't understand exactly why he knew White before now.  She recalled the moment months ago when Alec had had a confrontation with White and his men, where Max had come by to help out.  She remembered clearly the feeling that had overcome her when she had thought Alec or Simon at the time had fallen victim to the gun.  Rachel remembered the feeling of dread coming over her as she closed her eyes, and tried to suppress the tears that were threatening to fall.  

***

Years ago she wouldn't have known that she was to meet this incredible man that would lead her through this whirlwind of an adventure.  When she had first met Simon she hadn't thought of a possibility that Simon wasn't Simon, that she would fall asleep and not wake up until years later, that she would be kidnapped and find out that there were others among her that weren't technically human.  Rachel wouldn't have guessed, yet she wouldn't trade it for anything in the world.  This was an adventure of a lifetime, and if she'd given it up she wouldn't have learned the things of the world around her.  Through all this she also learned more about herself, that she was less independent then she had thought, that she was stronger than she thought she ever was.  Although the journey had ended, she still felt that somehow it was just the beginning, and that there was more in store.

She remembered when she first met Alec; he was Simon at the time.  He tried to act so professional wearing those glasses and always wearing suits.  Rachel smiled at the thought of him.  He was so different from all the boys she had met, not just because of his maturity but every aspect of him.  There was something different, like he was uncomfortable in his own skin… now she understood why.  She giggled at the memory that had resurfaced.  It was when she had asked him to go swimming with her.  Thinking back now it was pretty funny how he stood there so awkward and childish, he was just so adorable.  

Rachel shivered as the breeze whipped through her hair.  Little traces of autumn were starting to show as the leaves had begun to turn their beautiful golden color.  The air had begun to become crisp and your breath would rise into the air like steam.  Frost was settling upon the surfaces that were uncovered by the sky, and she could almost picture the snowfall that would come within the winter months.

She closed her eyes, trying to saver this moment where everything was still and nothing could disturb the serenity this image produced.  When had things become so complicated?  If only things could be the way they used to be when she was a child, carefree.  The only pain children really felt under normal circumstances was that of cuts, scraps and bruises, nothing too emotionally bruising.  If only things could be the same, but as adulthood nears a new outlook in life begins to rear it's ugly head.  Though not always ugly most tend to focus on those of misfortune.  All this pain begins to transcend and all you're left with is a broken heart.  She remembered the way she felt when her mother 'left', and blamed herself that her mother was gone.  Now she realized that she needed someone to blame and it was stupid to have felt that way, but either way it didn't erase the pain that was within her heart.  Now she only wished that Alec was okay, and she wouldn't have to go through that again.

Rachel slumped over on her balcony chair, tears started to form in her ochre eyes.  They wouldn't fall; she wasn't going to cry about something she cried for, fo so many nights in the past.  She was determined to think optimistically, and the bright part was that she was safe, she had her father, and in someway she had Alec too.  That was all that mattered.

TBC…

Authors Note:  Sorry this took so long.  I really wanted to make a longer chapter but it failed.  I guess I just have to write shorter ones.  Anyway I hope you like this chapter.  Please give me some feedback!!

~ Inevitable


	6. Chapter 6

Chapter 6 

He opened the folder one last time double-checking; his designation for the time being was to be 'Alec,' a smart-ass of sorts with numerous wise cracks, someone that doesn't always obey orders, and a transgenic with a family.  _Family_, what a joke, he laughed bitterly.  They are soldiers how can they possibly consider each other as family?  It's a sign of weakness. He sighed as he sat upon the plush couch; the only light was that of a fire glowing out of control within the fireplace.  The darkness of the night shown through the glass windows, and from afar stars twinkled.  The cabin was cozy a soldier led him here; to what purpose X-5 494 did not know.  He was told however to gather his thoughts, and figure out his plan of action to fulfill the mission written within the folder he held in his hands.   He threw the folder into the roaring fire; this was it he was going in.  

***

The light of day found it's way through the curtain covered windows.  He squinted as the rays of light shown in his eyes.  Alec got up, rubbed the sleep from his eyes, and dressed in the clothes given to him as part of the mission.  It was finally time.

Alec walked towards the gates of Terminal City, he could almost smell the stench of war, and he knew that war wasn't too far away.  He wore what looked like the attire he had left Terminal City in, there was no sign that a bullet went through the shirt, nor were there any signs of blood stains.  He took a deep breath as if calming his nerves, wind ruffled through his hair, and he walked on slowly. Alec was soon startled out of his complex calmness.  "Alec! It's you!"  _This was too easy._  He looked up to see the one that has spoken. Alec raised his arm up in a slight wave and the door to the transgenic world was open.

As he walked in he couldn't help but be mesmerized at the secret society, the little city bustling with militia.  He gazed intently at the all the transgenics, all-working on a plan to destroy what was known as the 'familiars'.  "Alec? Is that you?"  It was a hush whisper, and with his enhanced hearing he could detect the shock, surprise, and a hint of relief?  He diverted his gaze to the one who had spoken; it was none other than X-5 452.  His mind kicked in overdrive, X-5 452 was the one he was to seek and destroy.  "Yeah, who else would I be?"  He sounded almost unsure of himself, what happened to that overconfident ego the size of the planet Alec? Max swept the thought away, he was back and everything was almost as it was supposed to be.  She surprised herself and the rest of the transgenic population that saw her lean over and give him a gentle hug.  He visibly recoiled, wincing as if her embrace hurt him.  Once again she pretended not to notice.  "Where have you been?"  Her words muffled as her face was against his leather jacket, she knew he heard her.  "Somewhere."  It was his only reply, as he hadn't thought that through yet, he was relieved as Max didn't press anymore and stepped away from the embrace.  He was almost tempted to take the gun out from hidden within his jacket pocket and kill her there, but he was intrigued, why had she been so gentle?  Why did she even care?  And to an addition to his being intrigued he also needed to follow his order in finding out what was being planned about their mode of attack.  

He could see a man slowly walking towards Max.  "Max!" he called, his face all business.  She turned towards the blond haired transgenic.  " Yeah?"  "Mole set up the radio, says that they're some important info for you and Logan wants to talk to you…"  "Thanks Zack."  "Adam remember?"  The blond replied almost bitterly.  Alec took this as an opportunity to introduce himself.  "The names Alec."  "Zack, but to Max it's Adam … so you're the one that Max and the rest of the guys have been worried about."  Again this confused him, _worried?_  

Why were all the transgenics on the outside so complex?  Had he been this way before?  What adventures had he been through, and why did he have the scar of a bullet hole on his chest?  Try as he might he couldn't remember what he had forgotten.

His perception of this mission had been utterly wrong.  When he was preparing to go undercover he had never thought of the little society he was so readily accepted into again.  He had thought that this mission was to go undercover into a colony filled with hardcore soldiers, soldiers that knew all emotion was a sign of weakness, the ones with the coldest of hearts… the ones he felt the most comfortable with.  Although he now realized that he once was like the ones in this little community filled with emotions and weakness, he wasn't like that now.  He was the soldier that followed the orders given to him, and if he was a good enough soldier he would risk his life to complete the mission.  He only hoped that his curiosity wouldn't get in the way with the completion of the mission, and already it had begun to be a problem.  Isn't curiosity what killed the cat?  And knowing that he had feline DNA, that wasn't a good example.  

"Alec it's nice to see you."  Alec looked at the taller transgenic, his long brown hair uncombed, his face like one of a dog,  "Uh yeah, nice to see you too."  The larger transgenic took a few strides and embraced Alec into a tight bear hug taking Alec off the ground.  Joshua set Alec back down, "I'm glad you're back."  "Yeah buddy…  me too."  Joshua too found the uneasiness of the words spoken by Alec, Alec was different, and he intended to find out why.  Under Joshua's watchful eye, Josh saw that Alec was different from when he had left to find Rachel.  He had somehow changed between finding Rachel and now, Josh saw his friend find solace in being alone, and how uncomfortable he was with the transgenics around him, this wasn't the Alec he once knew.  Joshua only hoped that this transformation was temporary, and that he would return to his old self soon, because they all needed that Alec back now more than ever.

To be continued…

Authors Note:  Sorry about the long delay, I've been suffering from writers block, and I had a burst of inspiration!  So I wrote this chapter, short I know… the inspiration died on me.  Sorry in advanced for the next long awaited chapter!  Thanks for your patience.  ~ Inevitable


	7. Chapter 7

Chapter 7 

He woke up in a haze, his mind covered by glistening fog.  He had shot up from bed, his throat sore from the scream that had erupted from within him.  It hadn't been the first time he had this nightmare.  He could almost feel the fierce heat upon his skin, taste and smell the smoke that was floating above the crisis.  He could still hear the screams echoing within his mind, the loud explosion replaying making his ears ring.  He could feel himself running, numbly towards the wreckage, but they had gotten a hold of him pulling him away.  He could hear his voice, feel it rumbling with sorrow, and anger… _"No!" _and then it was silence, and there was nothing but him in the darkness, all he could find solace in was his sorrow for what he had done.  For the one who had killed all that had meant anything to him, he was going to kill her; he was going to kill 452.

Alec sighed as he wiped the sweat off his forehead, his heart pounding within his ears, it hadn't been the first time he had this dream.  This nightmare that haunted him of things he couldn't remember, of people he couldn't remember.  All he knew was that _Max_ was the one that pushed the button and killed the one thing that meant anything to him.  He knew now that he would never let anyone in his heart ever again, he was going to be the soldier he was meant to be.  He was going to be X5 494, and nothing else.  

He got up from the cot, and got dressed.  Alec sucked in a deep breath as he walked with large strides towards the center of the transgenic haven.   He walked in to find everyone already bustling to get things done.  He recognized a few as he had only truly met them the first day he had gotten there, but found that as everyday went on more and more transgenics seemed to show up.   Alec had grown accustomed to the things that were happening, to the people there.  He found that even though Max had given him such an affectionate welcome she had become hostile to him.  Not _hostile_ per say but somewhat like that, she didn't hold the same affection towards him anymore, and reverted to calling him names.  Somehow he had found comfort in the little bouts they had, where she would make a remark and he would say something clever.  Though she always looked at him weird after he had said something, like she was expecting another reaction out of him.  Hell, he couldn't act the way he was supposed to after all he wasn't the same man anymore he couldn't even remember who he had used to be.  Though she wasn't supposed to know that, and neither did the other transgenics.

Though he was almost hell-bent on killing 452 something held him back every time he tried.  Alec had so many opportunities to pull the gun out from under his jacket and put a bullet in her head.  Although a swarm of transgenics would come to see what happened to their poor little maxie, they were so gullible he could just act like it was a sniper or something and he would be out of there.  Sure not a polished situation but it was the only way since Max hardly ever left the city and when she did he didn't even notice.   He growled as his frustration took over, he hated her so much for killing the person he loved, but yet he didn't want to kill her.  Something was holding him back, and he didn't know what.  All it came down to was that he cared about Max but hated 452, and that just didn't make any sense.  He knew what she had done, he knew he wanted revenge he wanted vengeance for the death of someone he cared about.  Guess he wasn't the soldier he thought he was, because the soldier he was supposed to be the soldier that would stop at nothing to fulfill the mission he was given.  

Alec was shaken from his reverie as Max called to him.  "Huh?!" he asked acknowledge the object of his thoughts.  "Can you get some supplies, we're running low on essentials here.  I know, you're probably going to ask about why I'm not going to go and why I won't ask Logan.  You know the danger if Logan tries to get stuff into T.C and you know that the press has already caught me on camera.  Alec, you are one of the only people I really trust here in T.C and I'm hoping that you can do this for me."  "Uh, yeah I can do that for you."  He smiled and as if on cue she gave him a confused look.  

***

It just happened again!  He smiled?  What the hell was that?  Is it just me or did he just genuinely smile?  What happened to that smirk on his stupid face?  What happened to all the bantering?  What happened to the Alec we know and love?  Her thoughts consumed her for the thousandth time this month.  She had been really worried about him, he was really quiet now and she didn't know why.  Every time she tried to talk to him about it he would turn her away or make up an excuse like he had a nightmare about his old missions.  Sure it was a legitimate excuse but this was ALEC!  He wasn't supposed to act this way, he was supposed to hide behind the mask and stay protected, use his fast wit and clever remarks to get through the day.  She hoped that he wasn't going to be like this forever as she watched him sneak out of Terminal City and disappear into the gray smoke and morning rays of sun.

***

She took a deep breath as if relishing the crisp morning air.  She loved this time of month where everything just seemed so beautiful, and the air seemed to dance around, as the steam would rise.  A smile graced her lips as she walked out from the gates of her home.  She had snuck out, she didn't want her father to worry, but she didn't want to be cooped up any longer.  What kind of life would she have if she was afraid to set foot outside of her own house, and somehow a life with a bodyguard watching her every move didn't appeal to her. 

Life hadn't been the same since the incident with the kidnapping; everyone around her was worried about her.  They wouldn't allow her to go outside the berrisford premises without an officer.  What kind of life was that?  Rachel knew she couldn't live that way, and she sure as hell wouldn't stay in the house any longer.  She wanted to be alone, so she left as quietly as she could, leaving a note upon her piano telling her father that she went out and for him not to worry. Rachel needed this time alone, she needed to think, and to get out into the world that so readily passed her by.  Already so many things had changed and she was just getting used to things around here.  Rachel had lost the two-years she had spent sleeping unconscious in her bedroom, she had lost the years that she could have spent learning and moving forward with her life.  Yet she had remained within that bedroom through those years and instead of moving forward or backward she was stuck in the middle not moving at all.  She couldn't help but be happy for she was alive when things looked grim, and yet again she escaped death.  Sure it didn't look like that man… 'White' was really going to kill her, but she had seen movies and she wasn't about to rule out that possibility.  If Alec hadn't found her when he did who knows what would have happened. 

Alec, funny how every thought seems to find it's way back to that subject.  She loved him transgenic or not, there was no denying it.  If only he would contact her.  She knew that he was busy with all the transgenic stuff, the whole becoming free thing… kind of like an act of independence.  Nonetheless she wished that he was with her right now, and maybe he would be when this whole thing blew over.  That is of course he doesn't fall for one of those transgenic women, she'd be stupid if she thought that there wasn't any_ competition, _considering his friend that was with him, what was her name again?  Max was it?  Although she didn't seem like she liked Alec in that way her mind might change, after all war can probably change anyone's mind.  

Rachel sighed, he did say that they couldn't be together, and then things just started to look a little more depressing. Before she took that as something that he said for her to stay away from him, but if he tried so hard to make her stay away didn't that mean that he didn't want them to be together?  Didn't that mean that he was trying to tell her to move on?  But how could she?  He was all she dreamt about, he was all she thought about, and he was in her heart and soul.  In a way he could be her soul mate.  What stupid revelation did she just make?  A tear slipped from her eye, she couldn't believe herself.  What had she been doing?  What had she been expecting?  That he would run to her with open arms, that he would love her back, that he would even allow himself to love her back?  He was a soldier and she found that out that day they were all held captive inside of Jam Pony, only now did she let herself believe that they could never be together.  Only now did she let herself know that they were from to different worlds, and it could never work especially since danger would be around every corner if they were to be together.   What kind of life could that be?  

She found herself entering the broken streets of Seattle.  Although the nature before her was beautiful, this part of it wasn't.  Everything around her was in shambles; people would live among cardboard boxes and sleep in alleys.  Everything just seemed so dark, and unhappy.  Sure ever since the pulse things had been this way, but not where she lived, she guessed that everywhere there was a piece of something bad there was a piece of something good.  It was weird how even though it should have been a sunny crisp morning, the gray clouds still hung over this part of town.  The weatherman may say that it was because of the wind, but somehow someway she thought that maybe those clouds where there for a reason.  That maybe the reason was a little more than the wind, that it meant something.  Maybe it was just her over active imagination but she could almost feel the storm coming.

Rachel turned her head to look beside her into a window of a grocery store, and almost fell over as she saw who was staring at her.  She gasped as she took a step back it was Alec, scary how she was just thinking about him.  She shivered although she was almost sweating from wearing the heaviest, warmest jacket she owned.  She kept telling herself to walk away and not turn back, but her legs wouldn't work.  Her legs just stayed planted upon the pavement, she would need a bulldozer to move her from that spot.  Rachel blinked a couple times trying to clear her vision; yes it was Alec all right.  He was still staring right at her, like he had never seen her before.       

Rachel took a deep breath, willing herself to turn away.  Slowly she turned away from the market, her back now towards the window she stared into seconds ago.  Letting out the breath that she had been holding he took her first step, and other steps followed.  She could feel her heart beat in pain, yet she still felt proud of herself.  She was letting him go like he did for her, and although it hurt she had to do it.  She had to let Alec go so he could be happy; after all it was all she wanted.  All she wanted was for him to be happy, if not with her then with whomever else he loved.  Tears threatened to fall, but she wouldn't cry.  For once she was going to be strong, and do the right thing.  As much as she wanted to turn back and run into his arms.  He wasn't hers anymore; he wasn't hers to begin with.   _"Goodbye,"_ she whispered as she began to walk faster retreating towards the Berrisford mansion.  

***

He had known that girl from somewhere, he didn't know where but he knew her.  Then if hit him; it was her, the one from his dream.  The one that 452 had killed, the one he loved.  His eyes widened, they made him believe that 452 had killed her, then why was she standing outside that window moments before?  Why did she recognize him?  It was her, he had to see her, he had to talk to her.  He immediately walked out of the store leaving his heaping full grocery cart he could shop later.  She was about a hundred meters away from him, he must have been thinking a lot or very slowly for her to be so far away.  But of course no human can match the speed of a transgenic soldier.  He opted to running and he caught up with her.  "Hey! Wait up!"  She stopped as if stunned to hear his voice she turned to him.  He grimaced as he saw her pained expression, what was wrong with her?  "Hey Alec," her voice was quiet.  

TBC…

Authors Note:  Aren't you proud of me? This has been the longest chapter of any fic I've written! Anyways please read and review!  


	8. Chapter 8

Chapter 8 

His eyes scanned the perimeter of Terminal City.  The breeze ruffled his blond hair, his muscular body leaning against the railing on the roof of an abandoned building.  He smirked as he watched the sector police and other authorities sitting lazily around the perimeter of Terminal City.  They'd have a field day if they found out about the tunnel underground.   

This had been under control as the transgenics waited for their opponents to strike first.  Though they were still having negotiations with the humans, they knew that White would find a way to attack.  

Sure he had known nothing about White, but it seemed that White was a lot more ruthless compared to Lydecker.  Max and the rest of the transgenics only confirmed this.  His breath, water vapor rising, as he gained new determination.  They were going to win this war, they were going to win their freedom and they were going to walk among the humans.  If this weren't going to happen then he would die trying.

The hope for a normal life had died for him when he had found out that he wasn't exactly normal.  His heightened abilities had freaked him out enough, imagine the surprise when he woke up one morning and his normally blue eye was pitch black.   He had seen a doctor about it, but the doctor had not seen anything wrong.  The image of his blue iris had come back with added pressure to his eye.   

He did have a somewhat normal life before everything went wrong.  Buddy and his wife were really great people; they were a kind and loving couple.  Buddy's family had embraced him with open arms, and accepted him, as if he was part of the family. He had even found someone to love.  Sure she hightailed it out of his life when she found out about his abilities, she didn't really love him, and he realized it now.  But he had still hurt when she had left and didn't accept him as he was.  He remembered the fear in her eyes when she put everything together with the newscasts.  The fact that he could lift something twice his weight with such ease, and the barcode imprinted on the back of his neck was the last straw. Still there was something holding him back from loving her completely and it had saved him more than enough heartbreak.  

The first time he saw Max in Terminal City he had felt something inside stir.  Sure he was still mad at her for what she had done to him, but he knew there were feelings for her that weren't classified as brotherly.  Zack knew she loved Logan virus or not.   So why couldn't he just let go?

A bitter laugh escaped his lips.  Since when had he become so weak?  Sure he had his moments of weakness, but not that many moments.  Emotions had begun to interfere; he was becoming almost too human.  The one thing he knew was that humans were weak, sure humanity could be a good thing but when emotions get in the way everything comes crumbling down.  

There were still things that he couldn't remember; his memory was like Swiss cheese holes everywhere.  However, he would have dreams about the past or at least he thought it was the past, he really didn't know.  They could after all just be dreams. 

Max had told him that he was the only one who knew where all their siblings were.  He had spent a lot time racking his brain trying to remember where everyone was.  It frustrated him that he couldn't remember, and it only made him angry when he heard that Tinga and Ben were gone.  Zack only blamed himself; it was his fault that he let Ben go down the wrong path.  Sure Ben could be classified as insane but Zack was his big brother, his commanding officer.  Zack took it upon himself to look after his siblings and he had failed both Tinga and Ben. 

He had heard also that Brin was caught in the explosions to the DNA labs when Krit, Syl, Max and himself tried to bring down Manticore.  They still didn't know if she survived or not.  Still he couldn't remember everything that had happened that day, all he knew was that he had killed himself to save Max.  That's when everything went wrong.  Manticore had installed him with high-tech technology, and erased him of almost all of his memory.  Max took it upon herself to decide where the disorientated Zack would go so she could save her beloved Logan.  

A loud sigh escaped his lips.  Maybe she had been right to send him away, but did she have the right to make that decision for him?  No.  She had been selfish, thinking only that Logan could have died.  Sure if given the chance he would have killed Logan.  But he would have killed Logan even if he was normal, he just didn't like the guy.  He only refrained from doing so because Logan could prove to be a good ally, but Logan still hadn't proven his worth.   Maybe he had proven it to everyone else, and maybe he had won all the transgenics over.  But Zack had higher expectations even though Logan wasn't a transgenic.  When Logan finally proves his worth, Zack might respect him.  Zack smirked, probably not.

TBC…

Authors Note:  Sorry for the long wait.  It's beginning to become a trend with my writing isn't it?  Anyway it's just because I've been suffering from writers block.  So it might be a while for the next chapter to come out.  SORRY in advanced!


	9. Chapter 9

Chapter 9  
  
His eyes clouded over as he knelt down to sit on the curb. Rachel watched him intently her ochre eyes full of worry.  
  
"What's wrong Alec?" He looked at her, his blue-green eyes glazed with tears.  
  
"Everything." He whispered.  
  
Rachel sat down beside him, "what do you mean?"  
  
"I don't remember anything. You're the only thing I even remotely remember." He framed her face with his hands. "I could never forget that face." His hands dropped to his side as he sighed. "But I don't remember, I don't know anything anymore."  
  
"Alec."  
  
"That's the thing, I'm not Alec. Sure I may look like him but I'm not him. I have dreams and I don't know whether they are a figment of my imagination or if they were memories. I don't know what to do! Hell, the ones I was supposed to trust betrayed me, I don't even know what side I'm on anymore. I didn't even know their names; you know the ones that claimed to be my family. Hell I don't even know your name!"  
  
Rachel placed her hand on his shoulder. "Alec calm down okay? I'll help you." She wrapped her arms around him in a comforting embrace. "By the way, my name's Rachel."  
  
They pulled apart and Rachel extended her hand to help him up and they started to walk side by side again. Alec took a shuddered breath, breathing out he watched his breath rise into nothingness. Things were still bothering him but it was starting to look up. He glanced over at Rachel; he couldn't help but feel more content. He felt good just being around her, and he knew one thing for sure, he loved her.  
  
"This would be my home, the good old Berrisford mansion." Rachel smiled as she gestured to the building. "Thanks for walking me home."  
  
"You're welcome." Alec replied as she turned walking towards the gates.  
  
Something inside him stirred as he saw Rachel turn away from him. Something inside him kept telling him to call her back. "Rachel, wait up." She stopped and slowly turned around as Alec jogged towards.  
  
"What's wrong Alec?" She asked as he caught up to her.  
  
"It's just that I forgot something."  
  
"Oh? What did you forget?"  
  
"This." He whispered as he took her into a warm embrace. "Thank you for everything. I'll see you later."  
  
Rachel smiled as they let go of one another. "Okay, Bye Alec."  
  
Alec simply nodded at her, there would be no goodbyes spoken between them. Then he willed himself to turn away and he was off back to the supermarket to gather the supplies they needed back in T.C. Alec walked slowly towards the market; he had so much on his mind. Everything from the good feeling he had when he was with Rachel, to the frustrations he felt when he was with the other transgenics. He racked his brain trying to find something, something he had missed somewhere in the crevasses of his mind. Somehow he would find out his true identity and remember everything; somehow he was going to find his locked up memories.  
  
He hadn't really thought about it until now. Now that he knew that Rachel was still alive, and Ames White had lied to him he wanted to know who he used to be. He had never really thought about his identity. All he knew was that he was a soldier, and that his designation was X5-494. That was enough for him. That was until he saw Rachel. Now he realized that the transgenics back in Terminal City had looked at him funny whenever he smiled, or said something sincere. The real Alec must have not done those things; maybe the real Alec was a closed off and cold person. That didn't seem right either since the reports he was given was that Alec hung around many transgenics not to mention bars. He growled in frustration, whoever he once was, was a very complicated and complex person.  
  
He found himself standing in the entranceway of the market he was at moments ago. He found his cart in the middle of the canned goods aisle. It was a miracle that the market employees didn't start putting away all the stuff in his cart. Although he didn't blame them for not wanting to put all of the stuff away after all his cart was full to the rim. He didn't think he could possibly put anything more in it let alone carry all the bags out with him. He pushed the cart effortlessly towards the cash register, the cashier looked at him wide eyed and surprised. It seemed as if he hadn't bought groceries in months.  
  
Alec felt compelled to explain, "I have a large family." A pretty flimsy explanation but it seemed to have worked as the cashier smiled at him. She handed him his bill, a whopping $400.00 dollars worth of stuff and this wasn't even for a quarter the population of T.C. Alec gave her the cash and grabbed the bags not looking back as she stared after him. It was suspicious to have that kind of cash on hand. He piled the stuff into Logan's Aztec and went on his way back to the warehouse and into Terminal City through the underground tunnel.  
  
Mole met him at the entrance of the tunnel. "Been wondering where the hell you were." Mole explained as he grabbed a few bags from Alec's grasp and brought them inside. Alec didn't reply he didn't know what to say, on top of everything else he didn't know.  
  
Alec unloaded all the groceries from the Aztec; he'd return the car to Logan later. He had some things to think about, and he decided he needed to clear his mind. He found himself walking towards one of the abandoned buildings (not so abandoned now) and went up the old creaky fire escape stairs up to the roof. He opened the metal door only to find his thinking spot was currently inhabited by none other than Zack. Alec sighed; at least Zack and him didn't really know each other. He didn't have to pretend around him, and what's more was that Zack was going through almost the exact same thing that he was. What a coincidence.  
  
Zack was leaning against the railing the second time that day. He heard the clang of the metal fire escape stairs. In an instance Alec was beside him, also assuming the same stance. Alec sighed, "Hi."  
  
Zack nodded in acknowledgement. "So, what brings you up here?"  
  
"I just needed to clear my mind. I have a lot to think about."  
  
"Yeah, me too." Zack breathed. "So what's on your mind?"  
  
Alec looked at him confused, did soldiers actually confide in one another? "Nothing really." For some reason Alec felt compelled to keep the conversation going. "You?"  
  
Zack shifted his weight, "just trying to remember everything. I've been told about all the things I've done but it's not like I remember any of it. Hell, I didn't even know I was a genetically engineered human until recently."  
  
"Yeah tell me about it." Alec's eyes widened, he'd been so careless that he basically given himself away. "I've basically lost everything, memory and all. I got shot the last time I was out; Max said it was when I went to find Rachel. I just woke up at a clinic one day and found myself needing to come back here to Terminal City. Like something was beckoning me to come. Imagine my surprise when everyone welcomed me in and said they all missed me. I didn't want to tell Max or anyone, I know they all have enough on their minds. But I'll be okay, I always am."  
  
Alec inwardly sighed with relief; it looked like Zack bought the lie.  
  
Zack slapped Alec on the back, "the memories will come back. they have to." Zack then began to head towards the metal door. Opening it he turned back to Alec, "Good luck." With that he headed down the fire escape stairs, the noisy clanging of the metal followed closely behind.  
  
Alec leaned on the railing, his dirty blond hair ruffled in the icy breeze. He could see the sky light up as the lightning struck, the crack of thunder following soon after. A storm was brewing and it would be in Terminal City within a matter of hours.  
  
TBC.  
  
Authors Note: Hey everyone! I'm sorry for the delay of this chapter. I really didn't think I'd keep this story on hold for this long! Anyway, I promise it shouldn't be more than a few weeks for the next chapter to be up. I really want to finish this story!! Anyway, ENJOY! 


	10. Chapter 10

Chapter 10  
  
Negotiations between Max and the humans were going as planed. The negotiations had at least postponed the upcoming war. People were starting to get tired of standing around the Terminal City borders waiting for something to spark their attention. However, the transgenics have been lying low, and doing everything in their power not to draw unwanted attention. Yet everyone knew that White was concocting a new plan of attack and doing everything in his power to make the genetically engineered beings look bad in the public eye. Thus far, he hadn't pulled anything drastic since Annie's death. He was planning something big; little did they know that they were going to be betrayed by one of their own.  
  
***  
  
Months had gone by since he had connected with Rachel again. They had spent almost every moment they had free together. He had found that while spending time with her, Max and Joshua he was beginning to remember and act like he used to. Sure he was still somewhat uncomfortable, but there were times where he'd let go and do or say something that was most definitely Alec-like. Nonetheless he still doubted it, as much as he believed what he felt and remembered he still had a mission to do. He still didn't know whether to go through with it or not, and he could tell Ames was getting a bit antsy. Alec smirked; he'd probably make White wait a little longer.  
  
Alec looked over at Zack who had just joined him at their favorite thinking spot atop one of the buildings of Terminal City. They had grown close after the past few months, most likely because they were both going through the same thing. Zack had somehow convinced Alec to tell the truth, letting everyone know that he too had lost his memory. Only Alec told half the truth and lied about the rest. The support he got from everyone was overwhelming, only now did he realize that the transgenics here really were his family.  
  
Over the small amount of time that he had known Zack, they had become fast friends and Alec would even go as far as calling him his big brother. He had learned a lot from Zack, and one of the lessons that stuck out the most was that love was a bitch and unrequited love was even more so. He was lucky to have Rachel.  
  
After talking to Zack, Alec found that there was something in Zack's eyes that betrayed him whenever there was a mention of Max. Sure enough Alec had made Zack confess but as always Max was too wrapped up in Logan. Yeah, he could understand that Max had to do her job in the negotiations between the ordinaries and the genetically enhanced, but the other part of her mind was far from that. she was always thinking about none other than Mr. Logan Cale and how she could cure her virus. Maybe someday she would realize that everything has been going wrong for her and Logan right from the start. Or maybe she had already realized this and she just wants to believe that Logan and her would actually have a chance. Either way, she was blind to the fact that Zack's feelings toward her were more than just brotherly.  
  
He scanned the shambles that was Terminal City. Logan could prove to be a good ally; the transgenics did need some friends on the other side. It's just that everything is so different now. Before they used to hide and cower, and now they were confined to opposite sides. They were of two different worlds, and being a soldier was all they knew. Being around humanity had changed them, and made them somewhat soft, but maybe that was a good thing. Without compassion humanity would have died out long ago, and so would the transgenics. Without compassion the transgenics would have lost in the war already out numbered by the strength of numbers.  
  
He looked over to his left side where Zack stood also leaning against the railing silently watching. Alec couldn't possibly read Zack's thoughts, but they would probably resemble his mixed emotions about Max, trying to move on without having to remember his past, and trying to remember his past. Though most people probably would like this Zack a lot better than the commando Zack. Alec turned back to the scene before him, maybe the commando Zack was what they needed right now. But Alec could be damned sure that Zack was trying to find the middle ground between Adam and the Zack that used to be Max's commanding officer.  
  
"This is so hard. all this waiting is driving me nuts." Alec finally broke the silence.  
  
"You can say that again. I don't really know what's happening, the negotiations aren't really getting us anywhere. But I know it's better then a whole lot of bloodshed. We have to do everything we can to prevent a war because war should be our last resort."  
  
Alec nodded in agreement. "Yeah, I just hope that it won't last too long though. We all know White's planning something, most likely something to ignite this war."  
  
Zack sighed. "Yeah the enemies are always planning something. All we can do is be as prepared as we can and try to overcome everything that they throw at us." He paused. "I know we are prepared for almost anything. But I can't help but feel like there's something that I'm missing, that something is out of place."  
  
Alec glanced at him, "What do you mean?"  
  
"I really don't know Alec, maybe it's the fact that I've been thinking so hard lately. With everything that's been going on I really haven't been able to concentrate with the task at hand."  
  
"Yeah." Alec sighed. "I know."  
  
Zack sighed as well; there was too much going on in his mind. Yet all he could really think about was Max. All he could think about was when he had finally confessed his feelings, sure the first time was subtle but the second time he had just said it right out. The second time he told her through tears, and she knelt there not even hugging him back. He didn't understand it at the time, but she never felt that way for him. She never would. It wasn't easy watching her making eyes at Logan, but there is a famous saying that if you love someone you should let them go. Zack wondered if whoever said that knew how much it hurt to let go.  
  
Authors Note: Sorry! I would have updated sooner, but my computer hasn't been working right the past month. But now that it's fixed it should be okay! 


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