1. Chapter 1

_Hello guys, I'm back with a new Callen/Kensi fic. I still don't ship Kensi and Deeks, therefore I set my new story in season one when Deeks wasn't even in the picture. I hope some of you out there enjoy Kensi/Callen as much as I do – and enjoy this story, of course. _

_A big thank you to all the readers of "Make the darkness go away" and a special thanks to "Guest" and "Guest" for reviewing, I hope for some reviews on this one as well. They are highly appreciated!_

_Summary: This story follows the events of the first episode of season one, "Identity", but goes its very own way from there. Kensi's worries for Callen make her return to the office late at night, landing her right into Hetty's arms – and later in somebody else's arms. _

_Disclaimer: If NCIS: Los Angeles was mine, I wouldn't be writing fanfiction. So…not mine, unfortunately! _

**Let's forget about tomorrow then**

„Miss Blye", came Hetty's voice from behind her, „what are you doing here this ungodly time of day? "

Kensi turned around slowly, not yet leaving her actual target completely out of view: "I…" but broke up her sentence before it had really started. She didn't quite know the answer herself, couldn't quite decipher the inner force that brought her back here this ungodly time of day like Hetty had called it. Probably Hetty didn't expect an actual answer anyway. Most likely she knew why Kensi came her, she seemed to know everything and sometimes was more aware of her agents' inner thoughts than they were themselves. It was astonishing and shocking simultaneously.

"Miss Blye", Hetty continued, "why don't you and I sit down in my office for a while to enjoy a freshly brewed cup of tea?"

_Most likely it won't be just tea, _Kensi thought. She feared the talk she inevitably had to have with Hetty, but there was no way to deny the offer, of course. Most of the time it was better to leave the talking to Hetty anyway, and right now, she was more than willing to listen.

Settling down in the chair Hetty had arranged for her, Kensi awaited an opening from the elder lady – but, to her unease, Hetty simply sat down opposite her and remained quiet, giving her an intense look. "Hetty…", Kensi hesitated, "I don't know…"

Hetty interrupted her gently mid-sentence, probably sensing her nervousness. "The tea, my dear, I almost forgot. I'll get us some right away. Tea makes everything better, don't you think, Miss Blye?" A small smile of relieve and gratitude washed over Kensi's face.

Kensi turned a little in her pre-arranged chair, noticing she couldn't face her target anymore. _Did Hetty know all along I would be coming here, did she place this chair like this purposefully? _shot through her head. She had no time to linger on that thought any longer, as Hetty returned with two steaming cups of tea.

With an inviting smile Hetty placed one of the cups in front of Kensi who accepted thankfully. Now she had something to fiddle with, keeping her hands busy, easing the uneasiness.

"Miss Blye, your devotion to your colleagues is honorable, but allow me a few words, my dear", registered Hetty's calm voice in her head.

_How could I deny her? _Kensi thought, although she wasn't sure she really wanted to hear them. Her words will probably hit home and, although she came to the office in the middle of the night most likely with the exact intention Hetty was about to mouth, talking about it with the older woman didn't suit her. An invisible force brought her here – and let her right into Hetty's arms. Kensi started to doubt her decision, but leaving now wasn't in the cards, of course. She inevitably had to listen to Hetty and she had no doubt hearing the words will make her want to run for the hills. She had no choice, she had to stay calm to face and fight her inner demons.

"My dear", Hetty started, "I first met Mr. Callen many, many years ago. He was a young agent, full of energy for the job, but full of uncertainty at the same time." Pausing for effect, Hetty took a sip from her still steaming tea. "He was a vagabond, not knowing where home was. And today, Miss Blye, today, he's still the same. I don't want to bore you with details, but the home he's so desperately searching for, desperately wishing for deep down, he will probably never find. The closest he's ever had to a home is here, Miss Blye. Your devotion is honorable, as I've said already, I'm sure Mr. Callen appreciates it as much as I do, but don't fool yourself. The demons from his past still haunt him. They keep him from settling down."

Hetty fell silent, prompting Kensi, but she remained silent, lingering upon what Hetty's just said.

"…_home he's so desperately searching for…, …don't fool yourself…., …the demons from his past…" _Why did she come here in the first place anyway? She wasn't sure, even less than moments ago if that was even possible, but the demons from the past, she knew all too well about them. Did she think she would be the one able to save Callen? Maybe she thought by ignoring her demons, she could at least help him with his.

Absentmindedly she took a sip from her tea. The warm liquid brought her back into the moment, interrupting her line of thought. In absent of anything better to say, Kensi turned to the older woman for advice, like she had done many other times before: "Hetty, what do you suggest I do now?"

Hetty remained silent for a few seconds, pondering upon Kensi's question.

"Do what your heart tells you to do, my dear, but keep in my mind what I've just said. The demons from his past won't be slain in one night, Miss Blye, don't fool yourself."

Hetty got up from her chair, retreating discretely, leaving Kensi wondering for a moment where she'd be going and when she'd be back, but her thoughts were interrupted when she heard a slight shuffle behind her.

Turning around slowly, she knew exactly whom she'd be facing, but still she felt a little bit shocked when she laid eyes on Callen. He looked disorientated, at least she thought so, his eyes and face never told her much, although she'd known him for some time already. Kensi came to the disturbing realization that he probably overheard at least parts of the conversation she's just had with Hetty and it embarrassed her.

In lack of anything better to say, she got up from her chair, moving in line with him: "Hello, Callen."

Callen eyed her with a look she couldn't quite decipher, and a feeling of uneasiness was starting to work its way through her body. "I..", Kensi started, pausing to collect her thoughts and find a way to continue her sentence. In the end it was fear that spoke out of her, a feeling she wasn't familiar with: "Maybe I should go." Taking a few steps in the general direction of the exit, Callen stopped her with a determined grip on her left wrist. It didn't even closely border on pain, but he had put enough pressure in it to make Kensi turn around surprised and slightly shocked.

"Thank you", he said. Hesitating, he continued by repeating the words: "Thank you, Kensi. I didn't get much from the conversation you had with Hetty, but to be fair, I want to let you know I heard her last words." He cleared his throat, pausing in his little speech. Kensi hoped for some more, but after a few seconds she had to realize it was obviously her turn now to say something.

Kensi put a hand on the spot where Callen was still holding her by the wrist, hoping to ease the pressure a bit. Callen seemed oblivious to the fact at first though, but released her as soon as realization dawned on him. "I…I am sorry. I didn't mean to hurt you", he said, looking down at the light-red marks on her left arm.

"It's okay", Kensi answered, "nothing to worry about. It doesn't hurt." Adding, but only in her mind: _At least it's not my arm that hurts._

"Callen, I don't know what to say. I don't know where to start. I came here tonight to check on you. I was worried. It's not healthy what you are doing. It might not be destructive either, but it's clearly not healthy." She paused, hoping she didn't have to mouth the words as she feared not to find the right ones, any words at all. Kensi prompted him with her eyes, but he just kept looking at her, not moving.

She won't be able to name exactly what brought her here tonight in the first place, and she certainly won't be able to explain what caused her next move exactly: She reached out her hands to take Callen's left hand into hers.

"I didn't, and I never had, and I still don't want you to stay on this damn office couch. I know I can't offer you what you need, whatever it is. Hetty was right. Hell, she was more than right. I'm afraid, Callen. I am afraid of my own demons, and I despise talking about them, that's why I avoid it whenever possible. Of course I can only guess which demons keep you from settling down, and that's okay, but I don't want you to move from motel to motel. And tonight, when I left work and you were still here, I had a very bad feeling. And I was right, obviously. Callen, I know Sam offered you his guest room and you refused. But I beg you…come home with me."

Taking a deep breath, Kensi felt relieved. Relieved the cards were on the table now. She had nothing more to say, nothing more to offer. Now, she waited impatiently for Callen's reaction.

"Kens…I, I don't know what…what to say." _Shit, _Callen thought. He obviously hesitated for a little bit too long. Kensi released his hand she was still holding: "It's okay, Callen." Turning around, Kensi made her way to the exit without looking back.

Of course it wasn't okay, she wasn't okay.

xxxxxxx

"Excuse my language, Mr. Callen, but you are a big idiot." He hadn't heard Hetty approaching, but when he turned around, she was standing right behind him. "I don't know what our lovely Mrs. Blye's just said to you, but whatever it was, you are a fool."

"Hetty…", he started, but fell silent when the elder lady raised a finger. "You don't have to justify yourself in front of me, Mr. Callen. But you better think of something smart to say to her. The girl came here this ungodly time of day with the ambition to safe you and you let her leave."

"Hetty, what do you suggest I do now?" Callen asked with a desperate look on his face. "Mr. Callen, Mrs. Blye asked me the very same question just moments ago and I can give you the same answer. Do what your heart tells you to do."

With these last words, Hetty left a disorientated Callen standing in the bullpen.

xxxxxxxx

Driving around the city aimlessly for an hour, he ended up in front of her apartment. He saw lights shining through closed curtains dimly, although it was almost morning. She obviously couldn't sleep and he know exactly it was him to blame. It took him some time to build up the courage to get out of his car and ring her door bell.

She opened on the second ring and when he saw her it almost brought tears to his eyes. A feeling he wasn't used to. She looked tired, exhausted and her eyes were red, dark shadows forming under them. She had cried, it was plain as day. He felt guilty. He felt like the literate idiot Hetty's called him.

Kensi didn't move, didn't offer him in, but didn't close the door either. _That's a good sign, isn't it? _Callen thought. His opening line sounded weak even to his own ears: "Can I talk to you for a while, Kens?" "I think there is nothing we have to talk about, Callen." He hoped for another reaction, but of course he couldn't blame her. He wasn't used to being rejected and was at a loss for words. He shifted uncomfortably, before he continued: "I came here to tell you I'm sorry. And I came here to follow Hetty's advice."

Without further warning, he stepped inside Kensi's apartment, moving her out of the way with his body. She was shocked, surprise visible in every fiber of her body. Callen turned around and with one swift motion he had the door closed and Kensi pinned against it. Looking her deep in the eyes, he said: "Hetty told me, and I am aware she gave you the same advice, to do what my heart tells me to do, and that's exactly what I'm doing now."

Moving closer to the woman he had still pinned to the door and at his mercy, he pressed his lips down on hers.

Kensi remained still for a while, not responding, but not kicking him away either. It took her some time to adjust to the situation, to make any sense of it. _Callen is kissing me…_shot through her head…_this bastard. _

When she felt Callen's demanding tongue against her lips, all protests and reservations she might have had vanished into nothing. Struggling to free herself from Callen's grip as he had her still pinned to the door, she moved her eager hands around his neck, while simultaneously opening her mouth to give him access.

All rational thoughts disappeared from Callen's mind the moment her delicate taste registered on his taste buds. It even caused a small moan to escape his lips, bringing a satisfied smile to Kensi's face.

"Callen.., stop." Kensi was breathless, her lips a darker shade of red already. Looking confused and displeased, Callen retreated slightly to look her in the eyes. _You are an idiot, _shot through his head. _How could I have expected her to let me in in the first place? _He wanted to say something, anything, but no words seemed alright. It was Kensi who spoke first: "Callen, what are we doing here? I…I want you, and, well, it's obvious what you want, but _what-are-we-doing_?", emphasizing the last few words.

There was no answer to that question, at least not an easy one and Callen felt a slight panic forming somewhere deep inside.

He had to come with a satisfiable answer, he owed her that much: "I don't know, Kensi. I wish I would! Of course I want you, and it's all I know at the moment. I don't know about the future, I don't even know about tomorrow, but I have never been more certain about what I want right now: And that's you, Kensi."

Callen released a breath he didn't even realize he was holding. Questions that requested long and difficult answers always make him feel slightly stressed and uncomfortable. He has never been confronting his feelings, never been open about them, but neither has she. They both valued their privacy, sharing a lot with the team, their friends, but never enough.

He realized his part was down now. He had nothing more to say, nothing more to offer. And honestly, he didn't want to go there either, not tonight, because – pondering on that line of thought much longer – would end up with at least one of them getting upset. But, somewhere deep down in his brain, a burning question started to nag, the question of what he could offer her. It was dangerous territory, too dangerous, because the question reached for the future; he pushed it away, burying it in the depth of his mind.

Tears started to form in the corners of Kensi's eyes, although they didn't spill, but didn't go unnoticed either. She didn't offer an answer to her own question, there was none she could come up with. Neither of them was even close to ready to make any promises, promises they most likely couldn't keep, for whatever reason. The time for promises was yet to come, if it ever came. When she finally spoke her voice was low, almost inaudible, but the true meaning of her words didn't fail its purpose: "Let's forget about tomorrow then."

No more words were needed after that. The space Callen's granted her only a few moments ago was closed again in no time. This time their lips connected in a rough kiss, no trace of any hesitation and reservations left. Kensi released a load moan of surprise when Callen picked her up without warning, not breaking their fevered kiss. He maneuvered them around her furniture skillfully, almost like he had never done anything else his entire life, only slowing down minimal at the stairs that let upstairs to his targeted room.

Reaching the top of the stairs Callen realized with embarrassment that he had never been to her first floor before, and was forced to stop now, _now-of-any-moments_.

He released the woman of his desire reluctantly, waiting until her eyes cracked open a slit. It took her some time to realize her surroundings, and some more time to make any sense of it. A seductive smile started to play around Kensi's lips then and she had Callen wrapped around her little finger in no time. She took him by the hand, leading him in the direction of her bedroom, swaying her hips in a sinful way while walking them to her room. Her little show didn't go unnoticed by Callen, his pupils dilating, gleaming in the dark and before he could stop himself he had his hands at her hips, wrapping around her slim form from behind, provoking a surprised laugh from Kensi while they stumbled into her bedroom.

The grip on her hips wasn't especially tight, it didn't hurt, but it incorporated a possessive undertone, leaving no questions what he desired at the moment, the way he wanted and probably needed her and to her embarrassment she liked it! She could already feel her blood warming up under her skin, the first heat coiling up in her lower belly.

Kissing her feverishly, Callen landed them both on her spacious bed, pinning her underneath him with the weight of his body. He was rough, but not careless, and since Kensi didn't put up an argument, Callen figured she seemed to like it, at least tolerate it. He wanted her, and probably had wanted her for some time already, and tonight, all pretenses ceased into nothing. She came to the office to save him, she didn't run for the hills when he showed up at her doorstep, and now they engaged into this, whatever exactly this was. It made them feel good, it was life-affirming, he needed it, they all needed it from time to time, it came with the job, and tonight, the two of them together, it felt just right.

Gripping the hem of her t-shirt he made short process with it, lifting it above her head to adore the delicate skin of her upper body. He was transfixed for a short moment, distracted by the champagne colored satin bra Kensi wore. It matched her skin perfectly and he had never expected her to wear such sexy lingerie, she had always been the cotton day-to-day type in his mind. Kensi didn't miss his hesitation, her observatory skills too highly developed, giving her the welcoming chance to return the favor, ripping at his long sleeve shirt, struggling to get it over his head. When he was stripped clear of it, he took one last longing look at her upper body with her incredible sexy bra, storing the image in his mind, before he unclasped it at the back, removing the straps from her shoulders and tossing the garment somewhere in her bedroom. Without further warning he took her left nibble into his mouth, while he paid the other one special attention with his hand, forming them both into high peaks, standing to his full attention in no time.

Kensi was becoming a quivering mess under his sinful torture, leaving her blissful and a little ashamed simultaneously. She didn't want to be the one receiving, she wanted to give with equal measure, but Callen's treatment of her upper body just felt so good, too good… "Callen", she moaned, trying to struggle free a bit, "I…", but before she could continue his mouth was against hers again, his eager tongue demanding entrance, and all thoughts of giving and receiving faded, leaving her mind and not to mention her judgment clouded. She tried to pour all the emotions flickering beneath the surface, all the things she felt but could not mouth, into that kiss, showing Callen just how much she was with him, how much she was with _them _in this heated moment.

For Callen it wasn't a question of giving and receiving, it was about them being here in this together. He had Kensi mewling underneath him, raveling in the sight and sound she provided him with was more than he could ever have asked for, more than he could ever have wished for receiving. It wasn't about love what they were doing, but there were definitely some kind of feelings shimmering just beneath the surface.

Returning his full attention to Kensi's upper body, he trailed a line of wet and open mouthed kisses down her belly, resting his lips at the hem of her jeans, biting down gently, marking her as his. Kensi made a surprised sound, her eyes flying open, looking down to the place where Callen's lips were still attached to her super sensitive skin. He lifted his head to meet Kensi's eyes and a knowing smile spread over his face. Before she could think straight again, Callen's mouth was back to where it had left off, and his hands fumbled with her tight jeans. Kensi lifted her hips instinctively, giving Callen the opportunity to strip her of her jeans, leaving her in nothing but her almost soaked panties.

His pupils dilated at the sight, and he was happy he still wore his jeans, the tight garment being a welcomed counterpoint to his throbbing erection, otherwise he probably would have come from the sight alone. Hooking his thumbs in the waistband of her panties, he wasted no time to remove the last piece of garment that separated him from her lust. What he saw underneath had his eyes gleaming and his erection growing harder and bigger in no time. He needed release, soon, but for a moment he couldn't help himself but stare: Her pussy was bare, perfectly shaven, allowing him to actually _see _her wetness.

Without further warning he slipped two fingers inside her, stretching her, while simultaneously rubbing her clit with his thumb. He wanted her to come, he wanted to see her falling apart, wanted to be the one making her come. Judging by the increasing heat and wetness he felt around his fingers, she was close already.

Enjoying every second of Callen's torture, Kensi started to moan – almost inaudible at first, but soon her moans become louder and less regular. She felt like she could reach the stars, and Callen wasn't even _in _her yet.

"Kensi", Callen spit out, his own teeth clenched already, "please, come for me." Being able, and above all being allowed to do and say this to her, was receiving enough for him, at least for now. He bent down to kiss her deep and passionate, increasing the speed of his fingers moving inside her.

Her release came in an explosive wave, taking possession of each and every fiber of her body. It took her some time to come back down, for her breathing to even out again.

She felt spent, but at the same time she felt something else, something hot and hard applying pressure between her legs. She must have been absent for quite some time, she realized dimly, the aftershock still present in her body, as Callen had enough time strip himself of his jeans and boxers.

Leaning up on her elbows, more feeling her way up to his ear, as her eyes were still closed, Kensi whispered sweetly into his ear: "Next time allow me the pleasure."

A knowing smile spread across Callen's face and he couldn't help himself but to release a lust filled moan. _Next time allow me the pleasure…_her words kept repeating itself in his head, and they filled him with a new sensation and something else entirely, something he wasn't able to put a finger onto yet. _Kensi's actually offering a second time, stating it like it's the normal and logical thing to say and do_, shot through his head. He probably didn't deserve it, didn't deserve _her_, he figured.

He didn't have much time to linger there any longer. All logical thoughts disappeared when Kensi raised her hips, changing the angle and bringing herself in line with Callen's throbbing erection. He growled, still lying on top of her, studying her expressions, but he didn't want to slide in yet although he was only centimeters away. It took him a hard time to resist the urging need, to resist the indescribable heat coming from Kensi.

He pushed against her entrance carefully, teasing, heightening Kensi's anew wave of lust that kept on streaming through her, taking possession of her and gathering at her center.

Callen was still waiting, waiting for her to open her eyes. He wanted to see her, wanted to look in those amazing eyes of hers, when he moved inside her for the first time. "Callen, please", Kensi hissed. Her eyes still closed in bliss, she missed Callen shaking his head.

"Open your eyes, Kens", he ordered in a sweet voice. "I want to see them, I want to see you." With a smug smile playing around her mouth, Kensi obeyed willingly.

The moment he entered her the world around her, the world around them seemed to stop. He was stretching her, and he wasn't stretching her bad. Realizing that the first thrust hasn't been especially strong or deep, had Kensi gasp in anticipation. She wanted him and she wanted him to be a bad boy, not sweet and lazy, but strong and dirty, and judging by his prior actions, the way he played her body, he probably won't deny. She knew she was game, hisgame, game for him. Whatever way, she wanted him to do something, she wanted him to freaking move.

"Callen…G, please, take me", not being able to form another coherent sentence, she simply hoped he got the message. Kensi usually wasn't the one to delegate control in bed completely, it was too much of a risk, especially in casual relationships. She liked to be dominant, at least has gotten used to it, but with Callen it was different. They trusted each other with their lives, neither of them needed to hold back, neither of them needed to stay alert, always careful what to reveal – and most importantly what not to reveal. She wanted to be taken, she wanted this kind of experience with him.

Hearing his first name, or rather his first letterwas unusual. He's always called her Kensi, he preferred it over her last name, although – in their job – it wasn't at all abnormal to only use last names, but she had barely ever called him G before. It made him feel special, it gave this whole _engagement _a special meaning – and one letter was more than enough to express it.

Callen took the wink willingly, sliding in deep with one hard thrust, burying himself inside her completely, before he started to move, establishing a fast rhythm right from the start. She was tight, he realized, somewhere deep deep down he was afraid he maybe might actually hurt her, but he didn't linger there any longer, as Kensi obviously didn't put up an argument.

Kensi tried to meet him thrust for thrust, but soon gave up when he put more pressure into his hammering strokes, clearly showing her now he has gotten the message before. She felt her next orgasm approaching already, starting to take over her body, tickling in all the right places.

Callen noticed the beginning contractions of her inner muscles, her tight channel becoming even tighter – it gave him a hard time not to come right here and now himself. He wanted to hold on a bit longer, wanted to put her and her pleasure first.

Pinning Kensi's arms above her head, fixing her wrists with one of his own hands, he slid out of her completely, but only to ram back inside a second later, having Kensi release an unidentifiable sound of shock and pure lust. He repeated the movement a few times, heightening the pleasure for both of them by stroking her clit every time.

"Kens", he hissed, before he lowered his head to her lips, kissing her passionately before she came apart in his arms.

He felt her muscles clench around him, trying to hold him inside her. He ate up her moans, as their lips were still locked. In a last effort, Callen brought his free hand between their bodies, rubbing her clit with his fingers to prolong her orgasm, all the while hammering inside her, keeping up the fast rhythm he had established.

It took Kensi some time to regain enough consciousness to think straight again; she carefully opened her eyes, feeling a little dizzy and disorientated. Callen was still buried deep inside her, and she released he was obviously waiting, he hadn't come himself yet.

"Callen", she said, gathering enough strength to speak, "please, come for me. I want to see you." Mimicking his words from before was more than enough encouragement he could have asked for. Taking up speed again, it only took seconds before his thrusts became less and less regular and he felt his orgasm taking control over him. Kensi took his balls into her hand, drawn close to his body already, kneading them, and he came in voluminous spurts. Her still tight channel milked him dry, and Kensi could have sworn she felt his seed right up to her womb.

By the time his brain processed again, he had his face buried in Kensi's shoulder, whispering sweet nothings to her while kissing her gently. When he carefully slipped out of her, although he felt like he could stay buried inside her forever, a gush of his seed combined with her juices trickled out of her. He felt a slight shock wash trough him, only now he realized they didn't use a condom. He was clean, and he wasn't concerned about any possible disease Kensi might have, as he was sure she was clean too.

"Kens", he started, feeling like he must bring up the topic, as a gentleman he should have at least asked _before _actually, "we…you know, we didn't use a condom."

Kensi felt sleepy, but with his words spoken she was quiet awake again, giving him one of her sweetest smiles, cupping his face with her hands: "Don't worry, I'm on the pill", kissing him slowly, she continued: "And I wanted to feel you come inside me."

Right before Callen bent down to kiss her, to thank her, she noticed a small flicker of _something _in his eyes. Relieve? Uncertainty? She couldn't say and soon forgot about it again, as it was gone again as soon as it came. She was too sleepy to hold onto the thought.

It didn't take long for Kensi to fall into a peaceful sleep, while Callen stayed awake, petting her beautiful body from time to time, her last words still echoing inside his head. They came so natural, but to Callen they meant the world. She actually wanted him, and she wanted his very core, it didn't come naturally in the otherwise casual relationships he usually engaged into. Protection – on all levels – was one of his top priorities, but with Kensi, he had forgotten completely.

They made a great team, she was a great partner, the best actually, maybe, he thought, maybe one day they might made the perfect team outside work as well.

With that last thought, he drifted off into a peaceful sleep himself.

_Thank you so much for reading, you are the best. Please, take a moment and leave a review. I'd be delighted. _

_Last, but not least: Happy New Year to all my dear readers here and around the world. _

_PS: I didn't mark it "Complete" yet, I might write another one or two chapters, exploring their growing relationship further. I can't promise yet, as time is always short, but I do my best. _


	2. Chapter 2

_Finally I've managed to write a second chapter, so sorry for the long wait, life got in the way. I hope it doesn't disappoint. This chapter mainly features the infamous morning after (I know, cliché) and I have to warn you: It might be slightly OOC-ish sometimes, but it's just so damn hard to imagine Kensi and Callen together 'the morning after'. I hope it turned out believable, at least to some degree. And last but not least…It's M-rated again, just so you'd be warned. ;) _

_Thank you so much for reviewing, putting the story on alert, adding it to your favorites and and and. You are the best. _

_Disclaimer: The tablet I'm using is mine, but NCIS: Los Angeles isn't, of course. _

**Let's forget about tomorrow then – Chapter #2**

Daylight gradually made its way through half closed curtains and pulled Kensi from a short but heavenly sleep. An indescribable happiness and relaxation was present in every fiber of her body. Waking up a little further, scattered thoughts of last night flickered through to the conscious part of her brain. She registered a pleasant soreness in her lower body, concentrating between her legs, a reminder of last night's activities, one of the pieces of the puzzle waiting to be put together.

Fragments of said kept appearing and disappearing again inside her head: She had sex, passionate sex, incredible hot sex, an experience so different from her usually superficial encounters with mostly random guys. It was anything but superficial, it was meaningful in its very own way. And above all: She was still here, wherever exactly here was, and judging by the weight balance in the bed, he was still here, too. She hadn't been running for the hills yet, her otherwise usual pattern after a night out.

Out? Awareness of her surroundings increased. The familiarity, even the smell surrounding her…This wasn't "out", this was her apartment, her bedroom, her bed. She actually woke up _in her own freaking bed_. Shock mixed with surprise had her open her eyes and jerk upwards in a sitting position.

oh no!

Her heart was beating fast, she could practically feel her blood pressure rising. Reality was a punch in the face. She had sex, really damn good sex in her own bed…with Callen.

OH NO!

She usually wasn't one to pray, but right now, she spoke a silent prayer in her head, a prayer asking please let him not wake up right now. She wasn't ready to face him, probably never would be, but that was impossible, of course. She had made anything else but wise decisions of whom to choose as her partner for the night, but this definitely took the cake.

Only then she dared to lay eyes upon him for the first time this morning. Turning her head slowly, trying to make as little movement as possible, the first sight she caught of him almost brought tears to her eyes. He was lying on his back, half covered by dark blue duvet covers, looking so peaceful, relaxed, but the still fresh scars ripping through his upper body betrayed the beauty in the picture. Her heart melted a little inside, the cracks in her walls increasing, all the disturbing and mixed up feelings from last night forced their way back to the surface. Seeing him like this, she couldn't stop a tear from spilling, wetting her cheek in the process. She remembered her drive back to the office, her conversation with Hetty, her talk with Callen and how she left, him coming to her place later the night… Kensi shook her head forcefully. She couldn't allow herself to go there, not yet, as the memories threatened to drown her.

Heat suddenly spread inside her body, she practically felt her cheeks taking on a dark shade of red. She had the urgent need to get out, to get away from this, from him, to clear her mind, make a meaning of last night's events – or forget about them completely. A shower would be great, and a run, a shower and a run.

Deciding to start with the latter, she crawled out of bed ever so careful, not really daring to make any movement at all, there was no way she could handle Callen waking up right now, and Callen wasn't one to be in a deep sleep often.

Proceeding to the bedroom door, she opened and closed it with as little sound as possible. Standing in the hallway, she buried her face deep in her hands, releasing a breath she didn't even realize she was holding, while absentmindedly shaking her head: _What did I do? What did we do? How – for heaven's sake – did it get that far? _

She really needed to get out now, she needed the cathartic feeling she hopefully would get from a long and fast run, but above all, she needed to get dressed. She would probably die of embarrassment if she was to meet Callen like this.

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Callen usually wasn't one to have _that kind _of dreams. Okay, from time to time _that kind _of dreams visited even him during the darkest hours of the night. He was a man, after all, destined to dream of _that _from time to time, and – although he'd never admit it – he even happened to have _that kind _of dreams about Kensi from time to time.

She was beautiful, impossible not to notice her long dark hair falling over her shoulders in waves, her lovely features…but most of the time, Callen didn't even sleep long enough to engage in _that kind _of dreams at all. But today was different and nothing could have prepared him for it. He felt like something new was to start altogether and he didn't quite know yet if it was for the better or the worse.

His dream was vivid, he dreamt in color, in vivid colors, like it had almost happened for real, like he was really there last night, and above all like she was really there last night, like they were really together. A slight blush washed over his cheeks. He figured he'll sure have some difficulties facing her in the office later. But even more so, he feared facing Sam. Sam was one of the few people in the world he could never hide anything from.

It was all just so embarrassing. He was the team-leader, responsible for her and her well-being and of course these dreams were absolutely inappropriate and unprofessional. And catching his mind wander back to the dream in awe was even more inappropriate.

He needed a shower, preferably a very cold one to erase the reminders of it. _Hope the water's running again properly_, shot through his head, _these motels are crap._

Motel? Awareness of his surroundings started to kick in. This clearly wasn't a motel. The bed was warm, astonishingly comfy, and he was actually in this warm bed and not on the cold and hard floor, bedded on a thin mat. But where was he? And how did he get here, wherever here was? He had gotten careless, protection one of his top priorities usually, how could he not remember where he was?

He sat up in an abrupt movement, feeling his body and circuit protest, eyes wide opened. The duvet covers were kept in dark blue, the room extremely homely, a little messy maybe, but it was a real home, and it almost looked like it could only belong to Kensi. Uncountable times the team had mocked her over her messy side.

Kensi… Her name had a small smile play around the corners of his mouth, and he didn't want to dwell on why, because there was something else nagging just beneath the surface. It had him taking stock of the details in the room and realization slowly dawned on him before lightning struck. This _was _Kensi's bedroom, he was in Kensi's freaking bedroom – and he was naked.

Oh no!

He forced himself to search the bed with his eyes and realized – a little to his relief and a little to his disappointment – that it was empty, but one thought kept running amok inside his head: He had sex…with Kensi, real sex and real good sex.

OH NO!

Strangely enough, Hetty's voice made an unasked appearance inside his head, reminding him how she'd called him an idiot just the other night. _If only she knew how right she was… _He was an idiot, and he screwed big time, how could he have taken advantage of Kensi to ease his own needs? They were colleges, friends even, he believed, but they've never turned to one another for _this. _How could he ever make it up to her, repay this incredible dept?

He clearly couldn't stay here, Kensi could return any minute and he wasn't sure if he could face her right now, or any time in the near future for that matter. And if there is one thing G. Callen was good it, it was running – literally as well as figuratively.

He needed to get out, now.

Grabbing his belongings in haste, he hurried even more so to get dressed, before he made a bee line to the ground floor, aiming straight for his car.

Boom!

The air was forced from his lungs, while he swallowed hard to suppress whatever kind of sound was to escape his lips.

Her already dark eyes took on an even darker shade of brown, almost turning black, while the color of her cheeks alternated between white and red.

"Callen."

Her voice sounded strange even to her own ears, his name coming out just a little above a whisper, almost breathless, sighing.

For a few seconds they just stood there, reflecting on their own thoughts, neither of them knowing what to say or do. In the end, it was Kensi who spoke up first: "Callen…you…I, I mean…it's…." _Crap… This is exactly the kind of situation why I refrain from anything but one-night stands, _shot through her head, while all the time almost absentmindedly fiddling with her keys to canalize the uncertainty.

"You know…I…", hesitating, Callen continued, "I was about to leave anyway." He realized how pathetic he sounded, how wrong even and how he failed to let his voice sound normal. Deep down, he didn't want to leave, he wanted to stay, be close to Kensi, but he couldn't. He wasn't made for it. Nobody has ever taken the time to teach him how to deal with his feelings and even less so how to talk about them. He was a runner, a loner and right now he was lost and all he could hope for was that Kensi didn't take him wrong. Of course he wasn't about to leave because of _her_, but because of _him_.

An almost inaudible "okay" was all Kensi managed, and – much to her discontent – tears started to form in the corners of her eyes again, although they didn't spill. What the hell was wrong with her? Usually she managed just fine to keep her feelings locked and in place, right where they belong, to her and only her. Time and experience had taught her it was for the best.

Callen felt guilty, he never meant for anything like this to happen, but then it just did, without preamble, without warning – and he blamed himself for it all. Seeing her standing in front of him like this, her hair disheveled in a loosening ponytail – and he was pretty sure it wasn't just the run that had caused it in the first place – he felt a wave of shame crash over him. When he got the job at NCIS many years back, it was the chance of a lifetime for him, his only chance even and then Kensi stepped into his life, as a colleague and later as a friend, but Callen's always considered himself too far gone to deserve a second chance of a lifetime, blinding him to the one standing right in front of his eyes. He was smart, an ass-kicking cop, but emotionally he was nothing but blind.

And then, all of a sudden, it hit him, taking him completely off-guard...his last thoughts before he fell to sleep the night before coming back. They actually made him take a step back to keep his balance. _They made a great team, she was a great partner, the best actually, maybe, maybe one day they might make the perfect team outside work as well._

How could he have forgotten and how could he have thought them in the first place? He wasn't made for a 'team' outside work, at least he's always told himself until he started to believe it himself, but right now he wished for nothing else but a reverse, a chance to start over new, a chance to stay and start over new with Kensi. Of course it was the wish of the condemned, ridiculous even, a wish never to be granted, impossible to fulfill, but it spread through who body until it had taken control of it.

He wished for nothing else but to turn back time. Kensi deserved everything, she deserved the perfect team outside work, she even deserved a white picket fence in suburbia, although he wasn't sure she even wanted one, but for Callen it was out of question, he could never give her that. Yet, falling to sleep with her the night before, in the same bed, was the happiest moment of his entire life, a moment he would have died a happy man.

"Kens", finally finding the courage to say her name and even look her in the eyes, he swallowed his fear and continued, "I don't regret it."

Before he could continue, Kensi interrupted him gently: "I don't either" and a small smile played around the corners of her lips while her cheeks turned adorable pinkish.

"No?" _Shit…_ The question was out before he could have stopped himself.

"No."

Practically seeing how she gathered up the courage, figuring it was almost unknown territory to her as well, she added after clearing her throat: "It might not be perfect, but I have at least some stuff for breakfast in the kitchen."

A smile spread across his face, one that was sure to reach his eyes, and his heart started to beat a little faster.

Although he knew about Kensi's 'cooking skills', the team has mocked her about them many a time, he was sure that whatever she was to offer him, it would be the most delicious breakfast of all times.

"Do you leave me in?", Kensi asked, her body posture relaxing visibly and her voice indicating their usual friendly banter with each other, a light twinkle in her eyes, since Callen was still standing in the door frame, a relief for both of them to realize that they were obviously back to normal, or, to better say, to as much normal as possible, since a permanent new normal was yet to be established.

"Try me", he challenged, hoping to continue their little banter here, and not pushing too far a little bit too fast.

He didn't know what to expect, there was no time to contemplate, but he was certain about one thing: He would have never anticipated this, although there was nothing else he could have wished for.

Taking a step forward, Kensi gripped his arms firmly, before she sealed her lips to his. Her tongue was darting out, eagerly searching for entrance, while she brushed her body against, rubbing in all the right places.

It took Callen some time to adjust, but the moment he stepped out of his passive state, there was no holding back. He answered every little move of hers with one of his own, heightening the pleasure for both of some in no time – and it almost scared him how much he wanted her.

His hand wandered down the small of back, resting at the top of her buttocks, before he pulled her even closer to his body. He was sure she could feel his growing hardness through the thin fabric of her work out clothes and when she released this incredible hot sound into their kiss, it was proof and encouragement enough.

Pushing and pulling their way inside her apartment, her upstairs bedroom suddenly seemed impossible far out of reach, had them opting for the couch instead, the furthest they got in their heated state.

The kisses were hot and passionate and thorough, and pushing her down into the cushions did nothing to tame the searing fire racing through his veins, but, awkwardly, he wanted more. He could have his way with her easily; fast and seamless, and judging by the way Kensi was moving underneath him, into his touch, she was anything but averse to it. It would be an almost perfect replicate of last night's activities and none of them could deny they didn't enjoy it, but it would just be sex again, great sex, but still sex.

"Kens", he breathed out against her mouth, "slow down", while he had a hard time telling this to his body. He wanted something different, more, he didn't just want sex with Kensi, sex he could have with random girls as well. Maybe to make love was still a bit of a strong word, and, to his great misery, Callen barely had any experience what _love making _does really feel like, but he was certain that they were about to engage into something more than just sex. Maybe not a relationship, maybe friends with benefits first, and when better to start then now?

Slowing down their kiss a little, he felt Kensi panting against him, her breathing uneven and fast, a little disorientated: "Callen, please…", while she tried to speed it all up again, not making any sense from his actions.

"Relax, Kens", Callen hissed against her skin, kissing his way along her collarbone gently, and then even lower down her cleavage, leaving goose bumps in the process.

Trailing a hand down the side of her upper body slowly, he found her delicate soft skin where her top and pants met, while Kensi's heart beat gradually evened out, allowing her to go with the slow exploration Callen's started of her body, although she wouldn't have complained about another passionate ride as well, but in the end she had to realize that Callen obviously had other plans in which she had no say in whatsoever.

Bringing them both upwards in an almost sitting position, Callen took the opportunity to gently bring his hands under her top, drawing circles over her flat belly and then up her ribcage with his fingertips, applying only a minimum of pressure, before resting just beneath her breasts, patting the delicate skin there.

Kensi lifted her arms, unasked, in a silent plea to maybe make Callen change his mind and speed up the whole process, but she found it to no avail. Of course he wasn't totally unimpressed, his fingers pushing down into her flesh, but ultimately it didn't lead to the wished result either. She wasn't sure yet if he was going this damn slow for her sake or for his own sake, and in the end, she figured, it wouldn't make a difference anyway, since whatever attempt she was about to make, he was not to speed up in the near future. Instead, she decided to just go with it and enjoy.

At least, Callen took the wing and stripped her off her top, not revealing a champagne colored push up bra this time, the one he immediately fell in love with the night before, as it was so unexpected, but a functional sports bra, and Callen couldn't decide which he liked better on her. In the end, it didn't matter anyway, since it wouldn't be long until her bra was past.

Capturing her lips with his mouth gently, he simultaneously cupped her breasts with his hands, they felt different from last night, flat inside her sports bra, and he couldn't wait to free them for their tight confines, feeling them with his bare hands where they fit so perfectly into. Wandering to the back, he unclasped her bra with a light click, before guiding the straps down her arms, and tossing the garment on the floor.

Callen started with her right breast, before moving over to the other one, licking at the pink flesh and this time, it was a slow burn that Kensi started to feel right down to her toes, not the blazing flame from last night, but the pleasant tickling inflaming her, and then she understood. Taking it slow this time was Callen's way to show her, yeah, what exactly? She didn't know, and wasn't even sure Callen could give a precise answer himself, and then it didn't really matter again. He was clearly showing her something, affection might be a close call, and the fact itself was worth enough, because it definitely meant something to him, what exactly was secondary and Kensi decided to let him lead and just feel.

A warm hand on her inner thigh had her moan in deep pleasure, desperately moving into the touch, while her lips almost lifted off their own accord, and when Callen moved his hand even further up her leg, he noticed the heat radiating from her center.

She was much hotter than she should be, Callen hasn't even touched her _there _yet and she already felt like she couldn't hold it much longer. The effect he had on her, driving her this far up with such a little amount of touch only, was startling her, and when she felt Callen's thumbs hooking in the waistband of her pants did nothing to calm her.

"Callen…", moaning inside their kiss, Kensi moved her hands down to rest them over his, and it was as much a permission to continue as it was a plea, since she was becoming desperate to feel him _there_. They were trained to communicate with looks, with gesture, anything but words, they could risk a mission too much, and it was only natural that they continued this pattern on their very special mission now as well, neither of them surprised that the other wasn't the vocal type, and Kensi was grateful for that.

A deprived sound escaped Kensi's lips when Callen stood up, just staring down at her for a few seconds, before he pulled her to the front of the couch cushions, forcing her to put her feet down to the ground, and Kensi complied willing as she had a notion of what was to come. Lifting her hips up, was invitation enough, impossible to reject, and with one swift motion Callen pulled her pants and panties down to her knees, before he removed them completely. He had a hard time controlling himself, seeing her completely naked in front him, clearly willing to take him, and he felt his jeans becoming extremely uncomfortable, but he reminded himself to take it slow, postpone his own pleasure and instead worshipping her in every sinful way, because he felt like he owned her at least that much.

Kneeling down between her spread legs, he brought his lips to her breasts again, biting down gently on her high peek, while he cupped her crotch with his hand. He wasn't yet sure how far he could go, how far she was okay with, but when he looked up, he saw her head leant back in pure lust, and he dared to kiss his way lower down her body.

When he reached her belly button and then even lower, he looked up a last time, not wanting to ruin the moment by doing something stupid, where he was met by a pair of dark brown eyes, gleaming, and when he saw Kensi nod her head slightly, he placed a gentle kiss to her outer folds, before he found the center of her desire.

It was too much, and not enough at the same time, for both of them. She tasted heavenly, incredible sweet to him, and he realized he must have done something right to deserve this. Absentmindedly Kensi brought her hands to his head, pressing his head closer to her center, she was rewarded with his tongue darting out, licking at her entrance, before sticking it in.

"O God, G.", she was close, her gaze and mind clouded to the point of no return, "please". He originally had no intention to grand her her release just yet, but the use of his first 'name' did strange things to him, he'd never known that it could have such an effect on him. Probably because he wasn't used to hearing it, especially never in bed, and now, he had heard it twice already in less than 24 hours.

The moment G. bit down gently on her clit, Kensi was sent over that miraculous precipice, and on the peak of her orgasm Callen added two fingers into the play, prolonging it to the point that equaled eternity. He was pretty close himself already, tasting her release with his mouth and lips had his jeans tighten around his very hard member uncomfortably, but he wasn't ready to stop playing yet, her female juices surrounding her adorable pinkish center were just too delicious to deny himself, and he took his thorough time licking some more of them.

Meanwhile, Kensi couldn't tell exactly when this incredible orgasm had ended, or if it had already for that matter, feeling Callen's lip and tongue between her legs was much more than she could ever have bargained for, while the aftershocks kept on rippling through her body, enlightening the flame of lust and passion anew.

It took Kensi her fair share of strength to order her brain to work again and her limbs to move again, but she didn't want to leave Callen hanging there and, more than that, she wanted to live up to the promise from last night, which – miraculously – made its way back to her consciousness right in time.

Pulling Callen's head upwards, she brought his face level with hers and locked their mouths in a tender meeting of lips, while her hands trailed down his torso, feeling its movements increasing the lower she got and when she reached the hem of his tee shirt, pushing it upwards carefully, Callen released a little moan into their kiss, which she drank up eagerly. She didn't want to ruin the moment by going too fast, and although two could play this game, she couldn't vouch for anything here, because Callen's very hard member was pressing against her overly sensitive clit now and even through the scratchy fabric of his jeans it felt heavenly.

Wasting not much time on his shirt – she had more important things in mind – Kensi tucked it upwards until Callen lifted his arms, a little reluctantly first, torn between kissing her and breaking contact for the ultimately greater good. When his shirt was finally gone, Kensi pushed forward a little, forcing Callen to stand up, before she re-did her former explorations south, this time using her mouth and placing feather light kisses along his hair line, only stopping when she reached the waist of his jeans.

Her hands were shaking slightly, and a groaning Callen did nothing to calm her, when she opened his belt and fly to relieve some of the pressure he must sure be having, before she gently pulled his jeans down. Pooling at his feet, Callen stepped out of them, all the while not losing eye contact, and he remembered her words from last night right in time as well, having his heart miss a beat. "Thank you", was all he managed through clenched teeth, her lips dangerously close to his member, too close because he could lose it here any minute now and he didn't want to risk that. He was a man, of course he'd enjoy a good blow job, who wouldn't? But he was afraid it might all be over too soon then, and instead, he opted for tucking at Kensi's ponytail, bringing her upwards, and before he had a chance to kiss her, he heard a faint "It was my pleasure" coming from her in a sweet voice and they sealed their agreement in a passionate kiss.

It started with a slow burn deep inside, a feeling so sincere it was almost unbeknownst to Kensi, the moment he felt the tip of his cock nudging her entrance. They were still standing upright, not her favorite position, but to be honest, she didn't really care enough right now, because by the time he pushed inside, only an inch or less even, she was sure it wouldn't be the last time they'd be doing this. They were both into it too much, enjoying it too much, although they've only done it twice by now, but she could tell beyond doubt by the way Callen was kissing her, moving against her, even opening up to her just a little – and she felt precious, special. They had a long way to go, a long way with an uncertain outcome, but in the end, they might make it, they will make it, but until then she didn't need to worry about any of that right now. Instead, she lifted her leg to wrap it around his waist, digging her food into the back of his thigh for better leverage, giving him better excess.

He wasn't a fool, and there was no way he could deny the offer, but he was a man on a mission and, although it gave him a hard time, he hadn't forget about his vow to take it slow this time, worship her, no matter her begging. "Kens…", he hissed, before placing his hands on her hips to slow their movements, "don't rush." Kensi wasn't a fool either. Exhaling deeply she realized she was trapped here and had no choice but to go with it, to go with him, although she wasn't quite sure yet where it would lead them.

Callen went careful this time, pushing easily in and out of her wet and hot sex. The rhythm was slow, set at a deliberate pace, allowing him to learn about her body not just with his hands but also with another part of his own body, and he came to the conclusion that he couldn't survive this slow torture himself much longer.

The moment he felt the first contractions of her inner muscles around him, her breathing shallow and ragged, he couldn't help himself any longer. While the first strokes had been shallow and careful, he now speeded up the whole process a little, still nothing compared to the rough ride from last night, but enough for Kensi to stumble over the edge again, and Callen was right with her this time. They rode out their joined orgasm as good they could, their knees almost giving way under them, to crush on the coach with a loud 'uumph'.

"Thank you, G.", was all she managed at that particular moment, because she finally understood. He was on a mission to repay, although there was no debt, at least none that she'd known about, but that was secondary, because it had been important to him, obviously. Maybe she would ask him about it one day, but right now, she was nothing but grateful. She had experienced an orgasm so different from the multiple ones she had with random guys and she could only imagine what it will be like next time, because, now more than ever, she was convinced there will be a next time.

It seemed like an eternity they were just lying there, their bodies gradually cooling down, enjoying each other's company, and in the end, it was Callen who spoke up first, surprising Kensi, but above all surprising himself: "Would you like some breakfast now?"

She needed some time to understand his question, not that it was challenging, language-wise, but difficult for her to gauge the whole meaning embedded, and when she finally did, she needed to laugh, it was all so surreal. Callen, her, breakfast...She wasn't used to any that, but figured she'd love to continue down that path, wherever it may lead. Propping up on her elbows, she locked her eyes to his: "I'd love to."

_Thank you for reading. Please leave some more reviews. _


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