Lost 1. A is for Ache

HELLO ALL!

Thanks in large part to the lovely devoted readers and reviewers of part 1, I give you Alphabet Soup 2.

Suggestions for letters are welcomed, appreciated and encouraged as well as reviews. Constructive criticism or even just 'hey, i liked this' are perfect, while flames will be used to heat my dorm in the Great White North :)

Without further ado,

enjoy.

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A is for Ache** - inspired by 'Ache' by James Carrington

They relax quietly, sharing a moment of silence. The moon is shining brightly in the night sky, stars glittering in the inky darkness. They lay together in the hammock in their backyard, cool breeze whispering across any exposed skin.

He reclines in the hammock, legs spread out the length of it comfortably and she's curled up against him, head pillowed just under his chin, knees resting on his hip. His arm is wrapped loosely, but protectively, around her shoulders, the other stroking the pale arm warm on his stomach. He feels her sigh and presses a kiss to her hair, feels her do the same to his chest.

In the distance, somebody is listening to Sinatra; a baby cries and quiets; a pot bangs.

She shifts a little and a leg is now wrapped around his, a foot settling between his calves and she's molded to his side. A comfortably heavy weight, better than any blanket. He stretches over his head and grabs the blanket he'd been using as a pillow anyway and one-handedly settles it over them.

She snuggles into the warmth of him and the blanket, a smile playing over her face despite the fact he can't see it. She slips her hand under his t-shirt and rests her hand on his warm skin, feels him take in a breath and let out a low chuckle.

The hand wrapped around her shoulders begins playing with her tousled hair, pulling gently through the strands. Her eyes slide closed and she strokes his stomach once before leaving her open palm over his bellybutton. He grins to himself and lets his hand continue stroking her arm and her hair at the same time.

He rocks gently and the hammock slowly sways with his momentum and she chuckles now too.

They lay there and stare up at the stars. The sky looks infinite from here, open in every direction, endless and deep and empty and full at the same time. The imperfect symmetry presented so simply above them slips into her. Inexplicably, she's crying; soft gasps that he doesn't hear at first but eventually recognizes. He feels it too and also hates it when she cries.

He doesn't speak, just pulls the blanket up around them further until her chin touches the hem of it. Her hand doesn't leave his skin and she pushes up to look into his eyes, presses a salty kiss to his lips, settles back again. He resumes his stroking. Her tears stop.

Her breath evens out and he can tell she's asleep. Faintly, he can hear Jin and Miles coming towards the house, slam open the front door as they usually do, call for him and Juliet. He hears them each grab a beer and start towards the back door.

He knows there's no way to yell at them without waking his hammock partner, so he waits instead, glaring at the door he knows they'll come through. He's surprised though, when instead of bursting into the backyard, they quietly open the door and step through, nodding in silence and settling in the only two yard chairs.

Sawyer raises his eyebrows in question and Miles waves a piece of paper in the air as he takes a sip of beer. Jin sips his own beer and tilts his head up to look at the sky. Sawyer suddenly remembers Juliet taking an extra minute after he insisted they sit in the hammock earlier. She'd written a note.

He smiles a little settles back down.

A few minutes of silence and then Miles quietly asks a question, Jin answers, Sawyer contributes. They have a conversation of whispers as Juliet sleeps, and at that moment, the ache of wanting to go home, of wanting some piece of a normal life back, recedes a little more.

Juliet shifts in her sleep and he knows they've woken her up, but he feels her smile and squeeze his stomach. So he squeezes her back and keeps up his ministrations as she lays there and listens to her guys.

Above, a plane glides silently across the sky, blinking rhythmically as it passes. Juliet watches it fly over head and closes her eyes again, breathing deep.

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and there's A!

Reviews, questions, comments, thoughts, concerns, suggestions are all welcome!

-jules :)


	2. B is for Bonfire

hello people! Thanks for all the great reviews and alerts!

i hope to update regularly, but college life has started up again, lol

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B is for Bonfire**

"You cold sweetheart?"

She didn't answer him and Sawyer just pulled her tighter against him.

He thought this would be a good idea. A bonfire on the beach, s'mores and beer and hotdogs on sticks. Music and friends, and he and Juliet under a blanket.

What he didn't think of was that tonight was the two year anniversary of the five of them arriving in Dharmaville.

On this night, two years ago, he'd talked Horace into letting them stay, had talked to Richard Alpert, had suddenly held the futures of four other people in his hands, wrapped in a con. Within months, Daniel had left for Ann Arbour and he and Juliet had formed a friendship built on trust and not a lie.

Now, as he looked over Juliet's blonde head, he could see Miles and Jin looking equally as pensive as he figured Juliet did.

Miles was staring at the tips of the flames as they licked at the sky, tiny embers flying off the wood and swirling up on the breeze, drifting away. It was difficult to guess at what he was thinking, for a change, as he nursed a beer and relaxed next to Judy, a sort-of girlfriend.

It wasn't too long ago, only a couple of weeks, that Miles had seen his mother in the compound, walking around with a baby named Miles. While he had shrugged it off, making sarcastic remarks and joking about it, they could all see it bothered him a little.

Jin was staring up at the night sky, the stars out and shining brilliantly on the clear night. Sawyer could assume that he was thinking about Sun, about if she'd gotten away from the island, if she was looking for him, if she'd had their baby. Jin touched his ring finger every now and then as he watched the glittering stars, beer can held in his other hand.

It was late by now, the music a little lower, a little slower; the kids were all gone to bed, parents gone as well. Horace had disappeared a while ago, Amy was in bed, hippies slowly leaving until there was only the four of them and a handful of others.

Sawyer shifted and craned his neck to look at Juliet's face; she was staring directly into the flames, blinking slowly, her face blank. He couldn't even begin to guess what she was thinking.

Her sister? Nephew? Home? Ben and his father had made a short appearance earlier, was she thinking about the man the little cretin would become? The fact that she'd spent five years on this rock now?

She hadn't touched any alcohol and hadn't wanted a s'more or a hotdog. She'd smiled at him and gone along with his plans and settled easily against him under his blanket, but it seemed now she was out of energy to try to appear happy, even for him.

"Sunshine?" he whispered, pressing a kiss to her neck, just below her ear. He felt her start a little and then she turned a little in his arms, a smile spreading slowly over her face.

"Sorry," she said quietly, kissing him gently. When she eased back he smiled at her and rested a cheek against her temple.

Her eyes closed and he felt her sigh. "What is it?" he asked.

Juliet shook her head a little and smiled a little. "Nothing, just tired I guess." It was like a code word; he knew there was something bugging her, but he also knew it wasn't something she couldn't handle on her own. If she needed him to listen, she would let him know.

He kissed her cheek and then helped her stand up with the blanket still wrapped around her shoulders. "Let's get to bed then," he suggested softly.

He gestured a goodbye to Miles and Jin who half-heartedly returned the wave before taking Juliet's hand and letting her lead him to their little yellow house. The further they got, the more the cool air pressed against the exposed skin of their faces.

As they reached the front door, Sawyer stopped short and Juliet turned to face him with a raised eyebrow.

"You know I love you, right?" he said seriously. He watched a myriad of emotions roll over Juliet's face; confusion, suspicion, happiness.

"Yes, James, I know. And I love you." she said confidently, reaching up a hand to touch his stubbled jaw. He smiled in a a way he hadn't before getting tangled up with Juliet.

"You know I have your back," not a question, a statement, a promise. Juliet nodded with a small smile. She came forward and kissed the corner of his mouth.

"I know that too."

"Alright." He said with a wider grin before leading her inside and closing the door.

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thanks for reading!

reviews and suggestions are love :)


	3. C is for Celebrate

THANKS SO MUCH FOR ALL THE REVIEWS!

they make my day :)

here's C!

enjoy

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C is for Celebrate**

"What happened in here?"

A glob of something slides off Miles' nose and hits the floor with a wet plop. The other two stand in silence, staring wide-eyed at her. Jin was holding a cookie sheet that seemed to be still smoking even though water dripped off it to the floor that was covered in flour. Sawyer held the bowl the water had previously occupied.

The walls were streaked with flour and icing, the sink full of dishes and pots and pans; the three men in front of her didn't look much cleaner.

She squeezed her lips together to keep from laughing but she felt it bubbling up in her throat. Sawyer blinked and looked over at the kitchen table and then back at her before smiling that smile that brought out his dimples.

She followed his darting look and spotted just one single cupcake, the ugliest cupcake she'd ever seen that also managed to be the most beautiful, sitting on one clean patch of table top. She couldn't quite contain herself and a grin spread over her face.

"Is that for me?"

The three men didn't move. "Yes?" they answered in unison, the answer sounding like a question, as if they weren't sure what she was going to do to them for messing up her kitchen.

Juliet bit her lip and crossed the kitchen, aware of their eyes on her, and picked up the cupcake, inspecting it for a second before taking a bite and chewing thoughtfully. She could practically feel the guys behind her hold their breaths.

"So?" Miles asked as she swallowed. She turned to face them and smiled softly before answering.

"It's absolutely disgusting. I love it." She broke out into a grin and Jin was the first to move, dropping the sheet in the sink before going back to pull her into a hug.

"Happy Birthday, Juliet." He said, his English very specific and enunciated. Juliet laughed and squeezed him tightly before turning to accept a hug from Miles, who enveloped her in a floury hug.

"Happy Birthday old lady," he said, even though she could hear the sincerity in his voice.

"Hey, somewhere in Miami right now a little me is getting her first set of encyclopedias," Juliet said, holding him at arm's length. Miles grinned and rolled his eyes before Sawyer shoved him aside.

"Happy Birthday, Blondie," he rumbled as his arms slid around her. He pressed a kiss to her neck and pulled back. "We were hopin' to make more'n one and surprise you, but you went and ruined it." he joked.

Juliet grinned and pulled back but held his hand as she took in the kitchen. "Well, I _was_ surprised. Are you going to clean it up too?"

Miles and Jin looked at each other and then at Sawyer who shook his head with a smirk, "Yeah, I guess we are darlin',"

Juliet chuckled and took another bite of her cupcake. "You know, I think I can stomach this if I pretend hard enough," she said around her bite. "How'd you manage to make just one?"

Again, the boys exchanged glances and smiled sheepishly at her. "We tried very hard." Jin said carefully with a grin. Juliet laughed now, a full on belly laugh that make her cheeks red and her eyes shine.

"Oh, thank you, all of you. Best island birthday by far," she said, looking each of them in the eye.

"Alright, you go, I don't know, take a bath or somethin' and we'll clean this up and start dinner, got it?" Sawyer kissed her smiling lips and pushed her towards the hallway with a playful smack to her jean-clad behind.

"Yes sir," she mock saluted. Miles groaned, "Please, no foreplay while I'm around. You're gonna scar me for life."

Jin just smiled and turned the faucet on in the sink. Sawyer smacked the back of Miles head and Juliet laughed and went down the hallway.

She came jogging back however and grabbed Miles' head and planted a kiss to his cheek. "Thanks Miles," she said before going back down the hall, laughing again as Miles jokingly complained loudly.

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ahaha ugly cupcake.

aren't they cute?

reviews are love!

:)


	4. D is for Dreams

sooo you guys are all amazing. LOVE the reviews and alerts.

this may just be the longest one i've written so far, so i hope that means it's good :)

enjoy!

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D is for Dream**

Sawyer watched as Juliet ran, crashing through the tree line into the jungle and its darkness.

Something held him back, an invisible restraint pulling tight across his body. He was screaming soundlessly, voice mysteriously and frustratingly gone.

He felt a small spark of hope and relief that Juliet had escaped, that she had the chance to get away, that she wasn't going to be hurt. She was strong; she was fast, smart, amazing. She would make it.

His spark was doused with ice water when she came stumbling through the brush again, head turned to watch behind her.

He couldn't see what was chasing her, _hunting _her, because all he could see was her blonde hair, hacked off to her shoulders in ragged strands, matted with dirt and leaves and was that blood?

Her face turned to him and for the first time raw fear was painted across her face; her big blue eyes, usually full of life, of laughter, anger, cool composure, were now full of complete and total terror. Their depths were overflowing with something Sawyer couldn't put a name to it was so beyond fear.

He was straining now, he was sure his face was red; his throat felt raw and he had a splitting headache. He could hear the wind blowing around him though, could hear Juliet's frantic footfalls as she sprinted towards him, fingers reaching for his jumpsuit. Her ragged breathing.

She was so close; he was pulling at whatever held him tight, yelling, eyes darting behind her as a dark shadow billowed out from the trees and over the grass and gravel of the Dharma compound. "James!" she screamed, voice cracking and full of the purest form of terror and fear. And pain.

The shadow overtook her in one quick surge and she fell forward onto her hands, face crumpling into something anguished and that sent a chill down a spine and a stab to the heart.

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Sawyer shot up in bed, sweat beading over his skin as he took deep breaths, mouth already open to yell her name again. He panted, dragging a hand through his damp hair. He could still see her eyes, her chapped and bloody lips curling around his name as she fell, her soft fingers digging into the ground as she was pulled from him.

A cool breeze came through the open window and made him shiver. A need crawled through him, beginning in the back of his mind and eventually sliding down to his feet, making him stand and leave his bedroom, moving off down the hall to the front door.

He paused in the open doorway, looking out over the peacefully slumbering compound. How many of these people knew the kind of horrors that resided on this paradise-like island?

Sawyer found himself heading silently next door and down the side of the house where Juliet shared a residence with Dan and another new recruit, Jenny. He lifted himself onto a rock, the rough edges digging into his bare feet. Quietly leaning against the ledge, he peered through the pane of glass.

On the couch rested Juliet, blonde hair long and soft as usual, fanning out over her pillow, a blanket lay over her body. The fingers of one hand fisted gently in the material, the other rested under her pale cheek.

Sawyer sighed in relief as her chest rose and fell in the rhythm of sleep, deep and even. He didn't know how long he stayed there, long enough to watch her shift slightly, to fight through a short nightmare, to smile a little in a happier dream. Eventually he felt the air begin to warm as it did just before the sun rose and he jumped from the rock and crept back to his house, slinking easily past Miles and Jin on the couch and makeshift bed respectively.

As he lay in his bed, the sun creeping in through the window now, he stared up at the ceiling and wished this was one of those nightmares he couldn't remember upon waking.

During the day he found himself checking over his shoulder; as Horace led him, Miles and Jin through the workings of the compound, where they would be helping out for the next week they would be staying until the sub came back, how they could get help or find someone.

Juliet was always there, either with them or him or nodding along, half-listening as she looked around at the job Horace pointed out that she could do temporarily.

By the time night fell again and everyone was tucked away, Sawyer felt better; everything was fine. Nothing was coming after them or Juliet. Locke would come back and they would get off the island, into their time and on with their lives.

He sighed and closed his eyes.

Over the next week and even longer as he convinced Horace to let them stay, he endured the nightmare as often as every other night; he would force himself to calm his erratic heartbeat and violently push the image of Juliet from his mind.

What was worse was when it ended differently, in ways he never cared to think of until he was dreaming of it again.

Every time he would get out of bed and cross the small strip of grass to Juliet's window and peek in on her first on the couch and then over time in her own bed, in her own room. Dan left for the mainland eventually, Jin and Miles got themselves into a bigger house with two rooms and he ended up with an empty house.

This night had been the worst yet, with thick crimson blood and bone-chilling screams and tears that stained pale cheeks.

He found Juliet's window easily, now she had her own room and he didn't have to worry about Jenny waking up for a midnight snack and finding him staring in through the glass. Sawyer watched her sleep, watched her breathe and live and not leave him into a cloud of black smoke. Or be dragged away from him by Ben. Or in his slightly less terrifying nightmares, Jack.

He pressed a palm to the cool glass. He noted that this wasn't working anymore. The mere sight of her safe wasn't enough to reassure him; after all the crazy things he'd seen on this island he couldn't quite believe what he saw.

He contemplated tapping on the glass and instead chose to lift the pane, smiling tightly in relief as it slid smoothly up, allowing the cool night breeze and himself to quietly slip into the dark room. Sawyer heard her sigh as the air rolled over her face and bare arms, watched with a held breath as she turned onto her back.

He knelt next to her bedside, sliding a hand across the soft white sheets. His fingers nudged her palm and he whispered her name. She shifted a little and drew her hand back to her side.

"Jules," he whispered a little louder, just barely. Her eyes slid open, sleepy and a deep shade of blue, like the ocean at midnight. She blinked at him before giving a subtle start and turning to face him completely.

"James?" She was frowning now. "What's wrong?"

Sawyer pressed his lips together before turning away from her to the window again.

"James wait, what's the matter?" She was sitting up now.

He looked over at her, blonde hair all tousled, face confused, eyes staring at him in question. Her oversized t-shirt slipped off one shoulder.

Aside from his fear of his nightmare and her being hurt, Sawyer couldn't help but notice she was actually beautiful. Cute even, sitting there like she was.

"James?" Juliet moved now, swinging her legs out from the sheets and over the side of the bed.

Her feet peeked out from the hem of blue track pants, a uniform of sorts they'd been given with the jumpsuits for starting their new wardrobe. Sawyer turned to face her and found himself sitting now, legs bent at odd angles, looking up at her.

"I've been havin' these nightmares," he half grumbled, half muttered, looking down at his hands.

Juliet sighed a little and smothered a yawn. A pale hand reached down to slide over his. This was one of the first touches she'd initiated here in the compound. Her touch was light and gentle, but grounding at the same time.

He could feel her skin against his palm, her fingers lacing through his and pulling him up, her warmth as she pulled him down to sit next to her. She was alive. She wasn't going anywhere.

"What happens in the nightmare?" she asked quietly, not looking at him. Like she knew it would give him courage to not have her piercing gaze on him.

"You get hurt," he answered gruffly.

She smoothed a hand over his arm and muffled another yawn. "I'm not going anywhere James; I told you that I had your back. You still have mine?"

He nodded and said, "Yeah,"

"Well then there's nothing to worry about." A beat of silence passed before Juliet spoke again. "Are you going to stop watching me all day, every day now?" Sawyer couldn't help a low chuckle. His shoulders felt lighter and he looked over at her, her blue eyes still glassy with sleep.

"Who knows what kinda trouble you're gonna get up to, I'm not there to help ya," He drawled. Juliet smirked and nodded slightly to herself, eyes closing again.

"Good night James," She rolled behind him and turned away, her back to him.

He sat there a few minutes longer, until her breathing evened out.

This became routine for them, Sawyer having his nightmare once and while, Juliet starting awake to the sudden realization that there was someone in the room, her pressing a hand or a foot or a hip to him to reassure him that she was still there.

Juliet never remained awake to see him leave, but when she woke in the morning all traces of him were gone.

Until one morning she woke up, having not had a visit from Sawyer, and discovered a small yellow flower sitting innocently on her pillow...

2 years later...

Sawyer jerked awake and gripped the sheets before sighing and scrubbing a hand over his face.

"James? What is it?"

Juliet rolled over and blinked up at him, reached out a hand to grasp his wrist.

"You're shaking."

"Damn nightmares,"

Juliet smiled sympathetically and shuffled closer, urging him to lie down again.

She curled around his back, pressing herself as close and she could get to him and wiggled an arm under his neck to bed at the elbow and tangle in his hair while sliding another around his bare, sweaty waist.

Settling her face against his neck, she breathed evenly, gently stroking her fingers along the skin and hair she could reach.

Sawyer calmed down and took hold of the hand around his waist, grasping the fingers tightly.

"How bad?" she whispered against his neck. He could feel her breath against his skin.

Juliet kept her eyes closed as he answered, his words painting an equally disturbing picture in her own mind, only with him being killed and her watching.

Sawyer lay quiet after telling his nightmare and sunk into Juliet's embrace. After a few moments, he felt her remain tense, arms soft around him, but muscles everywhere else almost vibrating with some kind of...

"What is it?"

Juliet shook her head and he felt her nose brush the back of his neck. "Nothing, James; you're just not the only one that gets nightmares on this island."

He felt her tighten her hold and keep him settled firmly against her until her breathing evened out and she relaxed automatically.

Sawyer breathed deep and watched the clock tick for a few minutes.

"I love you," he whispered.

"Love you...too," Juliet managed before burying her face between the pillow and his neck.

Sawyer smiled.

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whew. dreams had to be done; no way these poor people go through the craziness of the Island without some kind of effects, lol.

reviews are LOVE.

i'll also be uploading E tonight as well, just because I can :D

thanks!


	5. E is for Escape

soo this one is sort of...sad fluff...if that makes sense. maybe it'll make sense after you read it.

enjoy!

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E is for Escape**

She escapes by locking herself away in the house; if she tries really hard, she can pretend the island isn't lying in wait on the other side of the door.

He watches her, day by day; some days she doesn't leave the house, stays away from the windows. Books are a constant companion and the drapes in her bedroom are drawn. Music plays at night, as if to distract her.

Her eyes are beginning to dull, the moments of brightness becoming fewer and farther between. He doesn't know what to do, how to fix it. He wants to, which surprises him.

She doesn't talk to him about it and he doesn't ask; that seems to be the requirement for living with Juliet. Asking questions she doesn't want to answer leads to unpleasant things.

He watches her now from the couch in the small living room; she comes down the hallway, avoids the window where beautiful sunlight is streaming in and heads into the kitchen. She pulls out bread and sliced meat, cheese, a knife.

She makes her sandwich, spreads mayo, all the while avoiding looking out the window. She focuses on her food, reaching up to grab a glass before dumping the knife in the sink. The extra meat goes back in the fridge with the mayo, the bread goes back in the pantry.

She stays away from the sun that fights to bathe her in light.

Water fills her glass and then she's sitting at the table in the kitchen, a book open under her fingers as she eats slowly.

He doesn't know, but she's very aware of his gaze. She doesn't look up.

He wants to say something, to ask why she acts like this; but, after all, it is only now and then she gets like this. Maybe it's just a mood swing.

And then he hears her sigh and turn a page of her book and he rethinks his theory. She can't stand to be on this island. She puts on a good front, most of the time, and this is one way of coping.

If she can't see the island, it must not be there. Or, at least she can pretend it's not.

He wonders where she pretends she is, with him. She can't pretend he's not there, right?

As if she can hear him, she looks up, her finger holding her place and offers a small smile that he accepts with one of his own. He goes back to the book he forgot he was holding and catches her do the same from the corner of his eye.

When she's engrossed in her book again, his attention wanders back to her. Her hair falls over one shoulder and the sun is creeping across the kitchen tile to lick at her feet. She doesn't seem to notice.

"Jules?" he says, breaking the silence filling the house. Her eyes snap up to his and she raises an eyebrow in question.

"Sun's gettin' closer," he says nonchalantly, eyes dropping to the sun on the floor and then back to her confused face.

She does the same before standing on shaking legs and coming towards him into the living room, half eaten sandwich left behind, with her book. She watches him carefully as he gets up and goes to the window.

He holds her gaze as he pulls the curtains, cutting off the view of the blue sky, the white fluffy clouds, the shining sun. The tops of the trees in the distance. The edge of the Dharma security office.

He sits down next to her, still locked in her gaze, her face hardening. Tears form in her eyes when he simply goes back to his book, knuckles white on the pages as he waits for her to make the next move.

She slides across the short distance on the couch and touches a hand to his forearm. He turns his head to look at her and she kisses his stubbled cheek gently.

She leans over and puts her book down on the coffee table before settling against his side. His arm comes up slowly, like he doesn't know what to do and she reaches over her shoulder to pull his hand down around her.

He smiles a little to himself and lets her get comfortable. His hand smoothes up and down the skin of her arm, just touching the the hem of the sleeve of her t-shirt. He feels her relax against her and she sighs a little.

She touches the book sitting on his knee, his hand still holding his place. He picks it up and finds his sentence, feels her rest her head at the place where his chest meets his shoulder.

He skims down half a page before finding where he left off when she distracted him.

She closes her eyes when he starts to read, his rough voice low and even, as he says the words that are already so familiar to her. As he reads, she settles more firmly against him, eyes falling closed.

He doesn't know how long they sat like that, how long he read, but soon his mouth is dry and his throat is parched. She is a warm weight against him and her breath is even and slow. As he sets the book down carefully, he realizes he's just completed Carrie, finishing the last half of the book.

There isn't anymore sunlight slanting across the living room, and the square of a window is dark with nightfall. He considers moving her but can't bring himself to wake her up. So he slowly shifts them so he's laying with his back pressed into the back of the couch, her body settled against him and wrapped in his arms.

It surprises him that she goes smoothly, no sign of waking, sighing and getting comfortable in their new position.

He feels something like panic, something that tells him to get out now, but he pushes it away. He has no need to run, he doesn't want to get away. She is warm and soft and trusting.

She breathes deeply in a sigh and deep blue eyes blink open sleepily. "James," she yawns, eyes already heavy and fighting to stay open.

"Sh," he quiets her, smoothing a hand up and down her back. Her eyes remain closed. "I got you,"

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yaayyy E!

reviews are LOVE.

have a good week everyone!


	6. F is for Fight

SO to make up for lack of updates, i give you 3 at once; F, G and H!

read and review please and thank you! it makes my day :)

enjoy!

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F is for Fight**

This was probably the only time he'd ever been this mad at her. He was yelling, not even real sentences anymore, just yelling, knocking things off the coffee table, things that mattered to her, flinging them across the room. He was in her face and then on the other side of the couch, and anything of value to her in the room was being displaced.

She blocked it out. It was like watching a movie that was muted; she saw his mouth open and angry and screaming, saw his red face and furious eyes, his hands wildly grabbing and throwing, shoving, waving. Her few possessions hit the ground, or the wall, or the door.

She didn't know how they got here, what had been said that set him off, but she knew she didn't want to be here anymore. She was finished being the one who got yelled at, left behind, cheated on, cheated with, hidden; who as quiet, comforting, stable, wise, logical.

She waited for him to take a breath and picked up the little blue flower he'd found for her the month before, on their two year anniversary in Dharmaville. She watched his eyes follow her fingers as she plucked the delicate petals one by one, letting the first fall to the floor before touching the next one.

Suddenly the room was so quiet it was deafening and she watched his eyes on her hands until every last petal was on the ground at her feet. She carefully bent the stem until it tore and dropped it too. Lifted a foot, stepped on the pieces. Ignored his intake of breath.

He was breathing heavily and looking remarkably like someone had just killed his beloved dog for a man who'd just been yelling for seven minutes straight and Juliet looked him square in eye, walked around the coffee table, and stopped, mere inches from his face.

He took her in and she let him look, long and hard he watched her face. And then she turned and left, quietly, closing the door with a soft click, leaving him in his own mess.

It took him a while, but he calmed down and picked up his first mistake.

The glass had shattered and the frame was a little bent; the picture inside looked intact and for that he was glad. A picnic on the beach with Amy and Miles and Jin; Juliet had overlapped a picture of the four of them Amy had taken with one of just the two of them, both reading a book, reclining in the sand, not even noticing the camera.

He freed the pictures and set them carefully on the coffee table.

He swept up the glass.

He picked up his second mistake.

The book was ruined, stained and dripping with the beer he'd spilled on it, probably on purpose if he was painfully honest with himself, and was torn at one corner. The title of the book was still visible. 'Carrie'.

He set it next to the pictures. Mopped up the spilled beer with a dish cloth, wiped at the place with water, dried it.

Bent to pick up his third mistake.

He regretted throwing them the second he did, but he had been so angry. His glasses, the ones she'd painstakingly worked out would suit and help him and ordered from Horace with advances on her paycheck she didn't have, were broken. A starburst of a crack started at one lens and spiderwebbed across the surface. An arm hung at a wrong angle.

He folded them and carefully set them next to the book and the pictures.

This went on for at least a half hour, him picking up things strewn around the small living room that held meaning to her (and by extent, him) and laying them out on the coffee table, cleaning up his mess, and her not being there.

Eventually, everything was clean, just as it was before. Sort of. He couldn't stand looking at all her broken things and raked a shaking hand through his hair. He'd broken more than her stuff, that much he knew.

He left a note next to her pictures and left for Miles and Jin's place a few doors down.

When he came back a few hours later, there was a blanket folded neatly on the couch with a pillow on top. His note was ripped up into pieces that were scattered on the coffee table. Her things were gone.

He went down the hall and looked in on their-, on her bedroom with a painful chest.

She had her back to the door, but he could tell she wasn't asleep. She took little ragged breaths that shook her shoulders. If she heard him in the doorframe, she didn't let it on. Why did that not surprise him.

"Blondie?" his voice was rough from yelling and he swallowed, trying to believe it would help.

She didn't respond to him, but the tiny sobs stopped abruptly and she went completely still.

"Jules, I'm sorry." he tried, and he meant it, every syllable. He didn't think he'd ever been this sorry for anything in his life.

"I'm sorry," he repeated when she still didn't say anything. He stood in the dark doorway in his jeans and t-shirt and work boots staring at her in her t-shirt and shorts pyjamas. His voice cracked and he hated it.

"I love you and I'm sorry." he said again. His voice cracked on 'love' and 'sorry'. He meant them.

She could tell.

She rolled over and stared at him steadily, watching him hold himself in the doorway, giving her the space and power over him. She bit her lip and tilted her head to one side on her pillow.

She looked up at the ceiling and opened her arms, heard his boots hit the floor with loud thuds, flinched as the sound made her think about their life landing in pieces on their floor.

He stopped moving towards her at her flinch. He sighed heavily and let his jeans fall soundlessly to the floor, and his shirt so he stood in his boxers. She still wouldn't look at him. He walked around to her side of the bed and crouched in front of her.

She rolled over to face him, face blank, arms crossed over her stomach now.

Why was it that he had said and done horrible things to her and she was opening her arms to comfort him?

"I'm sorry, Juliet, and I love you." he said, holding the edge of the mattress and her gaze. Tears welled up in her big blue eyes and he reached over to wipe them away as they fell silently.

"I'm sorry."

Juliet sniffled and her face crumbled a little.

"I love you." He kept wiping her tears, one at a time, until she moved back on the bed and he climbed in next to her, reaching out a hand immediately to continue wiping her cheeks.

"I'm sorry."

"That's the eighth time you've said that. If you include that stupid note." she said quietly, staring right into his eyes. His fingers stroked her face as her tears slowed.

"I'm sorry." he whispered and she smiled a little, closing her eyes. He leaned across the small distance and kissed a closed eyelid, then her red nose, a tear-stained cheek.

Her arms unclenched from around her middle and one settled on the hand stroking her cheek.

"Please don't yell at me anymore." she stated quietly, opening her eyes again.

"I promise." he whispered back. She nodded and he folded her into his arms, smoothing a hand up and down her back until she yawned, settled comfortably into his embrace, and drifted off to sleep.

When she was a snoring quietly against him, he kissed her hair and rested his chin on the top of her head.

"I love you."

* * *

not sure about this one, let me know what you think? kthx.

reviews are, as always, love :D


	7. G is for Gift

hello all, continuing our triple feature tonight is G:

this chapter is dedicated to **koralina** who came up with the prompt _gift_ and also to **eyeon** who i believe requested some post-finale goodness.

hope it does you two proud!

**

* * *

G is for Gift**

They'd been given a gift; from whom wasn't important, neither was the reason, only the gift itself.

_Life._

James couldn't get enough of her, standing in a cold waiting room in some hospital, Apollo bar sitting forgotten on the tiled floor. She was crying and laughing and her hands were on his face, as if trying to determine if all of him was there.

His hands moved too, over every inch of her he could reach. Their urgency quieted and in the glow of the vending machine he smiled at her. He pulled her smiling mouth to his again and their kiss was sweet, happy. Full of love and relief and joy.

Eventually she pulled back and he wiped at her cheeks. The tear stains remained, but she didn't seem to care. She was saying something about a church, about going to see everyone off, but he really wasn't listening.

All he could see was that heart shattering moment of her falling down into that hole, the bittersweetness of their goodbye on his tongue. He kissed her again, hard, to get the taste of dirt and her blood out of his mouth.

She's not stopping him and he's insanely grateful for it. He runs his hands through her blonde, blonde hair, clean of blood and debris, down her beautiful neck, free of nicks and bruises. He pulls back and lifts her hands to his mouth, kisses the fingers, pale skin unbroken and smooth.

James can sees she's crying again and lets one of her hands go to wipe at her tears, hers comes to his lips, where a cut used to be, touches his stubbled jaw.

It's still as rough as she remembers. She knows they have to go, have to get to the church and see everyone. She doesn't know, understand or care why exactly, but she knows everything will be so much better when they do.

But for now she's pretty happy with James staring at her the way he is, touching her, kissing her, holding her.

His arms come around her again and she presses her face into his neck, the ends of his hair tickling her nose. She laughs into his skin and he kisses her shoulder through her lab coat. He pulls it off and she stops him with soft hands on his wrists.

She can see the raw need and love in his gaze but they need to go.

"There'll be time, all the time in the world," she says quietly.

A page goes off and barely registers with the two of them. James smiles a little and nods slowly, pulling her hands until she's pressed up against him again.

"I ain't ever lettin' you go again, you hear?"

Juliet laughs and nods against his shoulder, pulls back, keeps her grip on his hand. She pulls him towards the door and the bright light of the hallway stops them for a moment. It feels like reality is hitting them in the face.

"So, not a grease monkey anymore, hm?"

Juliet shoots him a dirty look but can't stop the grin that takes over. "Well, maybe I'll still play the part and slide under a van for you," she says with a smirk as they start to walk again. Their hands are tight in each other's grasp despite their easy, teasing tones. He pulls her to a stop by a bank of pay phones and she goes willingly into his arms again. Neither couldn't care less about their surroundings.

"That a promise Blondie?"

The nickname falls easily from his lips and he smiles at it and sees her close her eyes and smile wider as she hears it. He presses his mouth to hers again and a nurse pushes by them in irritation.

"Well I remember how much you like that shapeless blue jumpsuit. We may just have to go pick one up." Juliet teases when he releases her lips. He shakes his head with a chuckle and his hands splay over her back like a warm blanket. They share another quiet, slow moment until he sighs and they continue towards the elevators.

They walk side by side, neither ahead of the other, and suddenly James can't wait to get to wherever the hell comes next. She wants to get to the church so damn bad? Fine. The sooner they get there the sooner they get their forever back.

So they finally make it to the church, see everyone they thought gone, forgotten, paired off. They sit and never stop touching.

Juliet can't stop herself from pressing her nose to his cheek and touching his opposite cheek with her hand, whispers something in his ear. He can't resist holding her a little tighter when a bright light starts to fill the space, even though he doesn't feel afraid of it.

* * *

When the warmth of the light fades, he's standing in a kitchen staring at a calendar tacked to a wall. A sunny, yellow wall. The smell of paint fills the air and he looks down at himself; worn jeans, work boots, plain grey t-shirt splatter with dried paint.

He doesn't take in the rest of the room though, his only thought that his hand feels empty and cold.

"Juliet?" he calls. There are footsteps racing across the floor above him and then he's moving too, running down a short hall and catching her as she flies into his arms and slams him against the wall behind him.

"Good to see you came with me," he chuckles, sliding down the wall with her sprawling in his lap.

She's wearing jeans too, with bare feet and a grey t-shirt of her own. She grins up at him and pulls his mouth to hers.

"This is ours," she says when they finally separate. His hand is splayed against the skin of her lower back, pinky dipping just below the waistband.

"Our house?" James says, looking around for the first time now. He doesn't question how she knows, how she's found the time to figure it out, but instead takes in what he's now realizing is their dream home.

"Our house," she confirms, grinning up at him. "Just us. And did you see the calendar?" Her eyes are big and blue and he knows her heart is beating just as fast as his. There are tears in her eyes that are brimming, one barely sliding down a flushed cheek.

"We're...we're free." James manages around a lump in his throat. He doesn't worry about where anyone else is, except maybe Jin and Miles for a half second, and he doesn't think of hiding who they are or running from Hostiles/Others or going back to wearing an ugly beige jumpsuit or 70's garb. They're home.

Juliet smiles in that way of hers and laughs, tears sliding down her dimpled cheeks freely now and he's kissing her again.

He pulls back and lifts her hand, twines the fingers together so she can see them holding hands.

"I think you should marry me, don't you agree?" he says more than asks, grin taking over his face easily. She smiles softly and nods, more tears coming to her eyes and his as well if he was honest. She lets go of his hands and places them on his cheeks, looking him straight in the eyes.

"I do,"

* * *

guh. love them.

reviews are love!


	8. H is for Hopeless

this is also dedicated to **eyeon** who's been wondering why Juliet was crying in the last alphabet soup (C is for Cry)

this could be a sequel of sorts, but by no means do you need to read (or even remember) that one to understand this one. but it would be cool if you did :)

enjoy!

**

* * *

H is for Hopeless**

The day was too beautiful.

That seemed to be how it started; the sky was clear and blue, the breeze was warm and inviting, the sun bright and comforting on her skin.

Her mood didn't match the weather. She was looking past the gorgeous day and the smiling faces around her to see the dark and ugly jungle, the security building with men coming and going with guns slung over their shoulders.

When the hell had this happened? When did it become more normal for her to see guns and jungle and VW vans instead of shopping malls and proper hospitals and actual cars?

From her place sitting on the small porch of the house she shared with James she could see him and Miles and Jin coming back from their weekly search of the jungle. For their lost 'crew mates'. It had taken a while, but they limited their searches to only a couple of hours on Saturday mornings.

Miles smiled as he caught sight of his mother carrying a baby him and shaking a little toy in his face, nudging Jin and pointing a little. Jin smiled and clapped him on the back.

The two of them broke off from James and met up with Dave and Chris, two other men from the security team, and went off to presumably get lunch. James got caught up laughing with another friend along the way.

Juliet sighed and felt her stomach clench. They were happy here. Or at least, adjusting. She'd done this already, gotten used to living in this stupid compound with the yellow houses surrounded by jungle and people she didn't know.

She thought going with Jack and enduring the beach camp a little longer would get her off this island, but instead she was just back where she'd started. All those years ago. Years. Tears pricked at the back of her eyes but she forced them back, swallowed the lump in her throat and then cleared it, forcing a mask over her face.

Just another thing she was getting used to.

* * *

Miles and Jin are over for dinner and she's making the pasta while James throws together a salad. Miles and Jin pull down plates and cups and grab forks and napkins. The men make easy conversation, as if this is a normal occurrence. Which it is. Except they're in the 70's, in a secret society of sorts, stuck on a mysterious island with no way home and she's playing house with stubborn Southerner.

Where was home anymore anyway?

They sit down with the guys still talking about work that day and the fact they wanted to trek down to the beach tomorrow to fish and maybe spend a day relaxing. They seem fine, content, and it worries her. Bothers her; a lot more than she wants to let on and a lot more than she can think about.

There's a comfortable silence and she finds she needs to fill it. For once, she wants to talk, wants everyone in that room to understand how she felt. Like she was stuck in slow moving sap that was swallowing her whole.

"I miss my sister," comes out slowly, quietly. She looks up, shocked that she'd actually spoken the words aloud, and sees that the guys are looking at her too.

"You have a sister, Jules?" Miles asks around a mouthful of pasta. He looks and sounds confused, both at the information and the sudden offer of it.

Jin just watches her quietly and James is looking down at his plate, like he doesn't know what to say.

Juliet can't stand the silence and finally puts a name to the emotion that's been wearing down on her for a while now.

She felt hopeless.

She got up from the table and left quietly, going down the hall as fat tears welled and slid down her cheeks. A sob rises in her throat and burns her chest but she won't let it out. She closed the door to her room and leaned against it, a hand coming up to her cheeks in a fruitless effort to wipe away the tears.

There's the distant sound of a door opening and closing and she knows Jin and Miles have left.

She heard James coming down the hallway and Juliet expected him to go into his own room to give her space. When a soft knock comes against the door, her sobs finally break free and she let him in. She turned and he was looking at her, lost and confused but determined to do something.

She can't speak, can barely breathe through her sobbing, and she lets him take care of her.

* * *

whew.

reviews are love :)


	9. I is for Innocence

hello readers!

thanks to all of you for the great reviews and all the alerts and the like!

a short and sweet one here, a little bit different than our usual points of view...

enjoy!

* * *

**I is for Innocence**

She sees them sitting at the picnic table one afternoon, a couple of complete strangers, a man and a woman, sitting together, bodies pressed close, heads bent together.

A book rests between them, two separate bookmarks in the pages at different parts.

To her, even though they are adults and obviously in love, they are the picture of innocence. They have each other and that's enough. More than enough. She watches the woman lean back and look at the man with a wide grin, cheeks flushed with laughter before he leans forward and catches her smiling lips with his own.

Their kiss is not offensive and it doesn't make her cringe; it's sweet and loving, like they're the only two people in the world. Innocent, innocent and happy.

She wants it, this love, this kiss, this togetherness. She wants a man like that to sit so close to her just because he wants to, to have a hand at her lower back, to gently trace her jaw, to kiss her so gently she wants to hold on and never let go of him. She craves it more than anything right now. Probably will continue to crave it into the unforeseeable future.

The man's nose brushes the woman's neck, lips coming up and just brushing her ear as he whispers, a secret caught between them that makes a slow smile spread across her mouth, love and joy lighting up her features as a laugh tumbles out.

He keeps his lips there, whispering to her, smiling through his words, and she laughs and listens. His one hand holds one of hers sweetly, the other alternates between caressing her back and sweeping slowly through her hair.

She feels like she needs that, now, too; she needs that comfort, needs it so much it hurts. She needs someone to treat her like she's their best friend, like they care for her as much as she for them.

She watches them a little longer, simply taking in their happiness and yes, their innocence, before it hurts too much and she turns away to the shade of the house. It's not until later that night she learns their names, and then she can put a name to the whispering couple she can easily admit she's jealous of.

That night, all she can think of is that Jim and Juliet are lucky to have each other.

* * *

did I manage to surprise any of you at the end or did you figure it out? haha, i'm interested to know...

reviews are love!

up next, J!


	10. J is for Julian

alllllrighty then; here's J

i'm hoping it's not too out of character and that i got the storyline/plot of it right, but if some part of LOST trivia is wrong, we'll call it slightly AU and move on, right? okay :)

enjoy!

**

* * *

J is for Julian**

Sawyer asks her one day why she won't look at any of the children running around the compound. She's been avoiding the question for weeks now and finds herself cornered in their bedroom.

"I don't avoid looking at them, James, I just don't stare at them all day," she says, a little testily in his opinion, before rolling away from him. His arm over her hips stops her from getting off the bed.

"It's more'n that; when one runs up to you, because you _know_ they love you, you flinch. You won't play with 'em, you won't look at 'em. I'm just curious, Blondie,"

Juliet sighs and feels a familiar lump forming in her throat. Her eyes sting and she flashes back to years ago (what will be years ago, years from now), a little boy and his mother on a monitor in an ugly Dharma station.

"I can't talk about him." she says before she can censor herself. She knows he's picked up on it.

Sawyer stays quiet even though he knows she realizes she let herself say something she didn't mean to. His arm isn't restraining anymore, but comforting, and he pulls her onto her back so he can lay on his side pressed up against her.

"Was he yours?" he finally asks, nothing but curiosity in his voice. She didn't have a child when he met her, never mentioned one.

Juliet sniffs and Sawyer looks away from her face so she feels less vulnerable, smoothes his hand over her stomach slowly until she speaks quietly.

"My sister's,"

He can hear the tears in her voice and makes a choice. He looks up into her watery blue eyes, stops her hands when they come up to wipe the tears before he sees. She meets his eyes and more tears pool and then slide down her cheeks.

"She had cancer. It went into remission and she, and I-," she stops and Sawyer holds her in his arms, but this time she doesn't try to hide the tears. He presses his nose against her cheek and kisses the skin on her neck.

"She wanted a baby. I helped her get pregnant," she chokes out, eyes focused on the ceiling.

Sawyer slides a leg over hers until she's completely enveloped in him. "You _are_ a goddess," he chuckles. He thought it would cheer her up a little; he's called her a goddess before, joking around.

Juliet hiccups and a sob breaks free. This time he can't stop one of her hands from coming up to cover her mouth. He pushes up so he can look her in the eye.

"I-I'm not, I didn't, and I-," but she can't speak. She squeezes her eyes shut and he doesn't know what to do or say so he just gathers her in his arms as best he can and squeezes until she has her face hidden where his shoulder meets his neck and her arms are fisted in his shirt.

He rubs her back and refuses to shush her.

Juliet sighs and yawns and relaxes a little in his embrace. "I played God, James. I put that baby in her when there couldn't, shouldn't, have been one." she whispers brokenly.

"And then I came here, because they heard about it, and told me to figure out why pregnant women died on the island."

Sawyer keeps up his caress, but he frowns as he listens to her story. "They just kept dying, James, all these dead women and babies and Ben told me he would cure her cancer for good."

Her voice is cracking again. "He showed me. Rachel had her baby, a little boy, named," she breaks off and he kisses her forehead, slides a hand under her shirt to feel her bare skin and she takes a deep breath.

"She named him Julian. And he was, is, beautiful. And she was healthy. And I,"

Sawyer feels her yawn again. "I don't even know if he knows me, if she thinks I'm even still alive. What if her cancer came back? What if she-," she cuts herself off and she's sobbing again.

He hates himself for it, but now he smooths both hands over over, murmuring things that don't make sense but wash over her until her breathing evens out. She's cried herself to sleep.

Sawyer learns a few things about the love of his life in these moments; she has a sister named Rachel, a nephew named Julian, was a better doctor and person than he ever could have thought, and that she was just as human and vulnerable as the rest of them. Maybe more so.

He also learns that he hates to see her cry, more than that, he hates to see her cry herself to sleep.

* * *

so...as i'm editing this I'm seeing i have serious problems with tenses LOL

if you see them, fix them in your head and i'll work on fixing them...better. wow.

reviews are love! they make my day.

:D


	11. K is for Kick

thanks for all the great reviews!

these next two (and I'm putting up 2 at once because they rhyme, lol) are two of my favourites, so I hope you all like them!

enjoy.

**

* * *

K is for Kick**

He finds out the hard (and fun) way that the back's of Juliet's knees are ticklish.

It started off completely innocent; it was how they spent most Saturday mornings. In bed, together, with a book.

Sometimes they read separate books, sometimes the same book over one or the other's shoulder, sometimes they would take turns even reading the book out loud. This particular morning, Sawyer was reading out loud as he sat up against the headboard, Juliet laying perpendicular to him with her head almost hanging off the edge, feet touching the other side of him as her legs draped across his lap.

He was smoothing a hand up and down her calf as he read, only pausing in his stroking to turn a page or push his glasses up onto his nose again.

Juliet lay with her eyes closed, enjoying the sound of his voice, the story, and the feeling of his hand on her skin immensely. It wasn't until he glided his hand over the back of her left knee that she became aware of just how close he was to the one place she was ticklish.

His fingers just brushed the spot before continuing on back down her leg and she relaxed, biting her lip to keep from smiling; he had no idea how close he was to finally finding one of her sensitive places.

He was getting upset, playfully of course, that she found his no problem.

On his next upstroke, though, his fingers stroked over the whole back of her knee and she stiffened a little, biting down hard on her lip. His fingers froze just under her kneecap as they slid around to the front of her knee.

She cursed herself inwardly. He was looking down at her now, green eyes peeking over the top of his glasses and tip of the book.

Sawyer stopped reading when a muffled sound came from Juliet. Was that a laugh? He looked her in the eye and ran his fingers over her kneecap again. She just stared back, lip between her teeth, the picture of innocence.

What the hell had he touched then? He was always looking for where she was ticklish; she found his places with frightening ease.

He ran his fingers around to the inside of her leg and up slowly. Her face blushed for a reason other than being ticklish and he promptly forgot why he was looking in the first place, the second that pretty flush blossomed up her chest and cheeks.

Juliet smiled as Sawyer leaned over her now, pressing her into the mattress and abandoning his search for her spot. His mouth was working over hers now, tongue meeting hers lazily, creating a reaction so strong it forced a soft groan from both of their throats.

He smoothed a hand down her side, over her tank top and over her shorts to her bare skin. She curled her leg around him and his fingers brushed back up again.

He laughed into her mouth when she tugged on his hair.

His hand was on its way back up her body when she jerked, a muffled laugh caught in their mouths. Really? What had he-

Oh.

He retraced his path until his fingers grazed the back of her knee. He detached his mouth from hers and stared down at her with a wicked smirk. Finally. His hand held down her shoulder while the other gripped her leg at the knee, keeping her where she was.

Juliet felt her stomach simultaneously jolt and sink as she saw him figure it out. Her breath quickened as he squeezed above her knee, smirking down at her with a look that screamed trouble.

He fingered the spot again and watched her bite her bottom lip; he knew she wouldn't, and probably couldn't, stop him.

As soon as he brushed it with the full knowledge that it was there, Juliet erupted into laughter and tried, unsuccessfully, to squirm away. He held her down with hips heavy on hers, the hand at her shoulder and kept tickling the spot, grinning wildly as she laughed, tears forming in her eyes.

"Stop! Please, stop!" she was laughing, trying to talk to him. It was too much. She wiggled and couldn't get free. "James, I don't want to-"

And he did it again and her leg jerked, her surprisingly hard kick catching him off guard and flipping him over so he rolled off the bed and hit the floor. Hard.

Juliet swallowed her laughter and wiped the tears from her eyes before rolling over and looking off the foot of the bed. Sawyer was staring up at her in confusion.

What the hell was that? He had been tickling her, enjoying the laughing, wriggling, flushed mess she'd become and then there was a sharp pain in his thigh and he was on the floor, her red cheeks staring down at him.

"Blondie?"

She grinned. "Yes, James?"

"Bit ticklish are you?"

Juliet shook her head. "I have no idea what you're talking about." In that even, cool voice of hers. Her smile gave it away.

Sawyer shook his head and growled as he launched himself off the floor and onto her again, a yelp bursting from her lips.

"I think you're bluffin', sweetheart."

"Prove it," she said breathlessly.

So he did.

* * *

hehe. some fluff for you all, a break from sad. so's the next one, in case you're wondering. :)

reviews are ALWAYS love.

:D


	12. L is for Lick

L!

enjoy -

* * *

**L is for Lick**

Damn cherry popsicle.

That's all he could think as he stared at the closed door in front of him. God damn _stupid_ cherry popsicle.

He heard rummaging around, fabric rustling and then a click as a lamp turned off. Silence.

Damn cherry popsicle.

It had started not even ten minutes before. If he was honest with himself, it had started three months before, after a year and half in Dharmaville with the hippies.

The day had been stifling hot, the heat not dissipating as evening rolled in, making everyone sticky and miserable. Sawyer had found Juliet on the front porch with a cold glass of lemonade that was rapidly disappearing...

"Looks like you're runnin' out Blondie," he drawled, leaning against the wall of the porch. Juliet smiled up at him, sweat beading at her hairline and over her upper lip. Her face was flushed.

"Do you want it? I've had four glasses in the last two hours," Juliet offered him the glass and he took it gratefully, gulping it down to try and ignore the feeling of a punch to the gut he felt as his hand brushed Juliet's.

"Don't choke," she teased, leaning her head back against the chair. Her eyes closed. Sawyer took the moment to look her over; she was dressed like every other woman in Dharmaville, out of necessity, in short cotton shorts and a fitted tank top and her feet were bare, propped up on the little railing.

_Damn._

"See something interesting?" she smirked, one eye open and watching him watch her. His eyes snapped to hers and she chuckled, closing hers again. She could practically hear him swallow thickly.

"Nah, too hot even for that kinda thinkin' darlin'," he drawled. Even though in his mind, this was the exact temperature for that kind of thinking; he could imagine a single bead of sweat rolling slowly down a pale throat, over a smooth sternum, slicking right down between two-

"James,"

He mentally shook himself and finished the glass of lemonade to compose himself. "What?" he said when he swallowed the last drop. Her hand was held out, pale fingers reaching for him.

He frowned. Juliet smirked. "I said, can you give me the ice cubes," she repeated in that quiet way of hers that he was finding hard not to think of as sexy.

"Sure," he handed her the glass back, careful not to touch her skin. He watched in agony as she tipped the glass back over her mouth, tongue darting out to catch an ice cube.

His gaze followed a torturous bead of sweat that just happened to slide down a smooth column of throat, down a smooth sternum, a few errant strands of hair stuck to her neck. The bead slowly got over them.

She moved. Crunching. Crunching ice cubes. Sawyer shook himself again, this time physically, and sat down on the porch, reaching wordlessly for the glass. She handed it back to him, happily crunching the ice cube in her mouth.

They sat like this a few moments, handing the glass back and forth until there was no more ice.

"I got it," Sawyer said as he swallowed the last of the ice. "Popsicles,"

Juliet smiled gently. "We don't have popsicles."

"No, but Amy does," Sawyer grinned before putting the glass down and taking off running the few doors down to Amy's.

Juliet shook her head with a smile and got caught up watching him when he came back; his eyes were glued to the popsicles, as if watching them would stop them from dripping all over his fingers.

Strong fingers. She watched a single drop from the grape popsicle fall onto his pinkie and slide down the digit to his wrist. She licked her lips.

"Cherry or grape?"

"Cherry," she said automatically, accepting the red treat from him carefully.

They sat in silence again, each thinking about the other in a way they thought they shouldn't. Then Sawyer made the mistake of turning to look at her to ask her a question.

She was licking the last of her popsicle off the stick, then licking her sticky fingers, one after the other disappearing between her cherry red lips. He groaned. Turns out, the sound wasn't just in his head.

"Brain freeze?" she asked innocently, honestly not aware of the effect she was having on him.

"Somethin' like that," he mumbled, quickly stuffing the rest of his popsicle into his mouth to distract his mind from her very red lips. Then she stuck her tongue out at him. He could have choked.

"Ha, is it red?" She went cross-eyes trying to see it before laughing quietly and playing with the stick, twirling it around her fingers lazily.

Sawyer nodded and noticed a single drop of the popsicle beginning to dry sticky at the corner of her mouth. He couldn't help himself anymore.

Sure, they'd joked about their changing relationship a few times, had come close to kissing but never actually got that far, had each noticed the subtle shift; but this time, Sawyer thought, there would be no mistake.

He stood and moved over to her, watching her face carefully as she stopped playing with the stick. He stood with his legs wide apart, hands on the arms of her chair, her legs resting casually between his ankles, and leaned down slowly.

Her eyes followed his, but his eventually strayed to her mouth; she opened her mouth to lick her lips automatically but Sawyer's hand came up to touch her jaw, fingers winding through her hair and tilting her head where he wanted her.

Her eyes stayed open and Sawyer moved ever so slowly, giving her every opportunity to pull away or hit him, like he fully expected her to. She didn't. Her lips stayed parted.

He noted that her eyes slid shut as his breath hit her lips and he couldn't stop himself even if she asked him to now. His tongue slid out and just touched the drop of popsicle, tasting the cherry and feeling something explode behind his eyes as she sighed. His lips closed over the corner of her mouth and his tongue withdrew.

He moved to kiss her cheek and when she still didn't shove him away like he still fully expected her to, he kissed her lips, mouth moving warmly over hers until she softened and responded, pushing up to him with hands on his belt.

He opened his mouth and this time so did she and grape and cherry had never tasted so good until that moment. A dam seemed to burst and his hands were both tight in her hair now, pulling her face towards him and up out of her seat so she was standing between his legs, hips pressed against his, as he leaned back against the railing.

Sawyer pulled her head back and took in her flushed cheek and swollen lips before moving his mouth to her neck, kissing first her jaw and then down the smooth column of her throat, paying special attention to the place where the side of her neck met smooth shoulder.

A gasp reached his ears and he felt fingers digging into his sides. He pulled back and kissed along her clavicles to the other side where he repeated his ministrations. Her head fell back and she finally responded like he hoped she would when she reached up and tugged his mouth back to hers.

Her hands were in his hair and on his neck and his inched down to slide beneath her tank top, feeling cool skin that was rapidly heating up.

When they separated for air, Juliet felt her brain slowly begin to function again; her first thought was,_ God he tasted good_, followed by _why the hell haven't we done this before_ and_ God it's like he knows all of me already _and then the panic set in, the fear; they were stuck in the 70's on this god forsaken island with no way of getting home. She was an Other, even if nobody called her than anymore, and he was a con man; both of them had lied for a living for so long now. This would just be them playing house. She couldn't take that again.

She tried to pull back and he let her back up a little before capturing her mouth in another bruising kiss they both felt down to their toes. She frowned into the kiss, still reeling from the sensations, and pulled back again, almost tripping over herself as she ran into the house and slammed her bedroom door.

Sawyer stood there, hand on his mouth like a lovestruck teenager (which he might as well be), for a moment before rushing after her...

And that was how he got here.

God damn stupid, _wonderful_ cherry popsicle.

* * *

thoughts? :D

this was largely inspired by the gorgeous josh holloway and my love of popsicles, haha.

reviews are love!


	13. M is for Moment

alright you wonderful readers, thanks SO MUCH for the reviews, and to those that go back and read previous chapters and comment! you make my day!

today was a snow day where I am so i had time to finally put this up!

enjoy.

* * *

**M is for Moment **(or My Girl)

They lay quietly in bed, listening to the soothing music coming from the record player. Elvis Presley crooned about not being able to help falling in love, soft strains floating across the room and over the pair settled comfortably on the bed.

Juliet lay on her back, dressed in her usual blue jeans and plain shirt, bare feet crossed and eyes closed as she listened. A small smile played over her lips. Sawyer relaxed on his side next to her, just barely touching, a big warm hand resting over her bellybutton.

At her happy sigh, he smiled and slid a hand under the fabric until he felt the soft skin of her stomach. He smoothed his hand over her in rhythm with the song on the radio and he watched her face. He didn't remember the last time he was this still, this relaxed.

_Take my hand_

_Take my whole life too._

_For I can't help_

_Falling in love_

_with_

_you._

Sawyer smiled wider as Juliet yawned and reached a hand up to hold onto his forearm as he moved his hand over her, not resisting, just holding on. He watched her smaller, slimmer fingers curl around his arm and rested his gaze on her hand as it settled.

He thought of the little box hidden under the floorboards.

Another song started up and Sawyer was pulled from his thoughts as Juliet's quiet, perfectly off key humming reached his ears. Etta James accompanied her and James smiled as Juliet yawned again, curling now under his arm.

He let her settle and rolled onto his back so she rested over him, a leg settling over his, a hand gently stroking his jaw and his moved to the skin of her arm. He didn't bother fixing her raised shirt.

_You smiled, and then the spell was cast_

_And here we are in heaven_

_And you are mine_

_at last_

He felt her shift and press her face against his neck, felt her smile against his skin and he closed his eyes as her touch lulled him. They lay in warm silence as the song ended, hands just barely brushing skin.

It had been too long since, if ever, they had felt this way; this safe, this loved, this comfortable. Sawyer started to drum his fingers against her hip as the new song picked up and he felt more than heard Juliet's chuckle as the words slid over them.

He kissed the top of her head and pulled her tight against him and continued his tapping through the end of the song.

_So darlin', darlin' stand by me_

_Oh stand by me_

They distantly heard children laughing, people talking and yelling to each other, vans driving into the motor pool; it seemed so far away from this quiet room, lights turned way down, just the two of them.

They lay quietly through the next few songs, stroking, holding, breathing, until Sawyer's stomach grumbled loudly. He chuckled and Juliet laid a hand over his belly. "Forget to eat lunch again?" she smirked.

He just kissed her head and snuggled into her welcoming body. "Maybe,"

Juliet sighed with a smile and sat up, hair falling over her shoulders in messy waves from laying on it. "Come on," she said quietly over her shoulder and Sawyer sat up behind her, pressed a kiss to her shoulder, her neck.

"I wanna stay here," He said, a low rumble to his voice from deep in his chest. Juliet felt her stomach flip but kept her smiling face soft.

"I'm sure you do,"

She pulled him up off he bed and he wouldn't let go of her hand upon standing, holding fingers as they walked down the short hallway to the dim kitchen.

He leaned against the doorframe as she moved around the kitchen, heating up a pan for grilled cheese. Sawyer loved watching her; it was a new favourite pastime. He took in her messy hair as she raked a hand through it, the small smile on her face as she hummed under her breath. Her bare toes peeking out from under her jeans.

Juliet wasn't surprised when a strong pair of arms wrapped around her from behind as she waited for the stove to heat up. A grin slid across her face and she leaned back into him as he swayed them to the music they could still hear from the record player in their room.

_You're just too good to be true_

_Can't take my eyes off of you_

_You'd be like heaven to touch_

_I wanna hold you so much_

He was humming now, a gravelly, comfy sound right in her ear that sent a wave of warmth and comfort over her, from head to toe. His hands moved, bodies still swaying and her facing the window in the kitchen, back to his front. Rough palms, gentle on her, felt the skin under her shirt at her waist.

Juliet sighed happily and Sawyer kept humming quietly, then turning her so they were swaying face to face, the beat picking up a little. She grinned and rested her head on his shoulder as he began singing at the top of his lungs, swaying faster as she laughed, until the song slowed again and they were left breathless.

Sawyer smiled as the next song came on and suddenly he was lifting her onto the nearest surface (the table) and running a hand through her hair, adoring smile directed solely at her. It made Juliet's heart skip a beat.

He kissed her then, a sweet kiss that made her want to cry, that turned into something so much more very quickly. They were offhandedly glad they hadn't turned on more lights than the one over the stove and the relative darkness of the kitchen and night outside hid them.

Sawyer pulled Juliet's shirt over her head in one smooth motion, sweeping her hair back off her face as it fell from the material and lowered his lips to her neck.

"Bedroom," she groaned into his shoulder, legs already wrapping around his waist; she was pretty sure her knees were jelly now.

He lifted her easily, barely detaching his mouth from her and headed to the back of the house.

"Wait, James, wait," she pushed at him until his arms loosened and she took a breath, lowering herself down from his grasp. He groaned as she slid over him.

"What, Blondie," he said, already reaching for her again. She stepped back and then around him, heading for the kitchen. Sawyer took in the sight of her in just her bra and blue jeans and thunked his head against the wall.

She came back moments later with a small smile, "Stove," she said innocently.

Sawyer reached out and grabbed her, lifting her up into his arms with a breathless laugh from her. He sang a few lines of the song to her as the door clicked closed.

_I guess you'd say_

_What can make me feel this way?_

_My girl_

_My girl_

_My girl_

_Talkin' bout, my girl

* * *

_

sooo what'd you think?

reviews are love, but you all know that by now :)


	14. N is for Names

wooow it seems like it's been forever since an update! sorry to leave you guys hanging, especially since all those great reviews!

this one is short and sweet;

enjoy -

**

* * *

N is for Names**

_"What's in a name? that which we call a rose_

_By any other name would smell as sweet;"_

Sometimes she still feels like the Other among them; on the outside, looking in on them in their new lives. She doesn't feel like a part of them.

Juliet can't bring herself to admit it out loud, but sometimes she thinks part of this is because she has no nickname.

Jin has several from Sawyer, most of them rude, but all of them inclusive.

Miles has a couple as well, the most popular being '_ghostbuster_'. She doesn't fully understand why this is funny but is still a little jealous if she's honest with herself.

Daniel has just two, '_the mad scientist_' and '_loony tunes_'. Neither are flattering and they aren't used often unless Sawyer is mad at him.

But Juliet didn't have one; sure, he'd throw out a '_sweetheart_' when he wanted to piss her off or butter her up for something she wasn't going to like. Maybe. She'd gotten '_island barbie_' a couple times. Mildly insulting, definitely, but it made her feel part of the group as twisted as that sounded.

Maybe it wasn't the nickname itself that mattered, but the fact that he had one for each of them but her. He knew enough about them, or at least he thought he did, to come up with a nickname that suited them. Even if it was rude.

She knew superficial things about him and he knew next to nothing about her.

She sighed and gave up the pretense of reading her book; there wasn't anyone else in the little house anyway. They were all out learning about the compound with Horace. She'd elected to stay behind and read, saying she was too tired to go running around in the extreme heat.

When they get back and have dinner together, some concoction of pasta and salad and a dessert Miles tries and fails to make, Juliet is quiet and the guys don't seem to notice too much. She's always quiet.

"What's going on in that brain of yours, hm?" Sawyer asks her some time later when he comes out to the small porch with two beers. He hands her one and pops the tab on his, sits next to her and her book.

"Nothing, James, just thinking."

They sit in companionable silence and then Sawyer speaks. "Why do you call me James? Nobody else calls me that,"

Juliet shakes her head a little. "It's your name. What else would I call you?" And then the question that's been on her mind all day comes out before she can censor or filter it.

"Why haven't you given me a nickname?"

Sawyer looks over at her a moment. "I'm afraid for my life," he answers half seriously. But a smirk is tugging at his mouth and she can't help but smile and little and roll her eyes.

"I got tons of nicknames for you, Blondie, I just ain't never used them,"

"Why not?"

"Didn't know you wanted one so bad, Capulet,"

Juliet grins and feels a stupid flutter in her stomach. She feels happy. Included. Not like an Other.

"Thanks Romeo," she says instead, in that low and even voice of hers. There's no need to let _him_ know how absurdly happy this makes her.

"Does that mean you ain't gonna call me James anymore?"

"I'll think about it," she smirks and goes back to her book with him chuckling beside her.

So he calls her _Blondie_ more often because he can catch the little upturn of her lips at the name and she feels more and more like she belongs with them as time goes on. He still throws in _Island Barbie _and _Capulet_ and _Sweetheart_ and different variations of the three and she gets used to it.

* * *

Pretty soon he's calling her '**sweetheart**' for a completely different reason.

* * *

short and sweet; Juliet didn't really get a nickname for the longest time, but when she did, it meant something :)

reviews are love!

hopefully another update soon!

:D


	15. O is for Only

WOW sorry for the huge ass delay! I had no internet for a few days, and then O just eluded me...anywho, here it is! more to come as well, just because I feel awful.

thanks for the reviews from earlier chapters as well!

enjoy -

**

* * *

O is for Only**

_"...and no one or nothing more besides; solely or exclusively..."_

_"Darling, you are, the only exception." - Paramore_

"Why won't you say it?" Sawyer asked one afternoon.

Juliet looked up at him in confusion. "Say what?"

"I love you."

Juliet frowned a little, like the words hurt to hear or think about. "I don't know,"

Sawyer frowned a little now. In his opinion, there was very little Juliet did not know. Especially when it came to how she felt about something or someone. "Sure you do. I love you. You know that don't you?"

Juliet was quick to smile and turn her big blue eyes on him. "Of course I know that, I do. It's just not..I don't know, James, okay?"

Sawyer frowned a little deeper but nodded, letting the subject go for now.

* * *

It was couple of days later when Miles came up to her in the motor pool.

"Hey Jules, you know we're getting to be like family here right?" Juliet looked up at him from the engine of the van in front of her and raised an eyebrow. Miles shifted from one foot to the other under her scrutiny.

"Yes,"

"We've been here, what, like two years?"

Juliet put her tools down and pulled off her gloves now, leaning against the bumper and crossing her arms. She was curious to see where this was going.

"Yes,"

"And we're, friends. Right?" Miles was almost twitching now.

"Yes, Miles, where is this going?" Juliet and Miles were friends, yes. She also knew he was usually extremely uncomfortable talking about how he felt about his feelings.

"It's just. We appreciate you. Me and Jin. We, well, we love you. Just thought you should know. See you at dinner," he quickly crossed the few feet between them and hugged her briefly before turning and all but sprinting away.

Juliet stood there in shock.

* * *

It was another few days later when Jin started a similar conversation.

"Juliet?"

Juliet put her book down and looked into the kitchen where Jin was making dinner for their weekly poker game, just the four of them.

"Yes, Jin?"

"We are friends."

Juliet avoided narrowing her eyes. "Yes, we are."

"And you care about me," he said, in his perfectly enunciated English. She offhandedly noted he was getting more comfortable with the foreign language.

"I do, and you look out for me," Juliet responded. She had a feeling she knew where this was going.

"Good. We love each other. We are friends." Jin said in satisfaction, with a wide smile. Juliet chuckled and grinned back.

* * *

It was the following night when Sawyer crawled up behind her in bed and kissed her cheek.

"You're amazing, you know that?" she said quietly, with a small, thoughtful smile.

"Not all that amazing, charming and irresistible maybe." he laughed into her hair.

She turned in his arms and held a cheek in her palm. "No, you're amazing. And, even if I can't say it now, you're the only one I want to be able to say it to and mean it as much I do. Aside from Jin and Miles. Who I feel completely different about," she smiled.

Sawyer fought down a very un-manly blush and kissed her gently.

"My parent's divorced, something about, they just didn't love each other anymore. I got myself thinking, maybe it's not supposed to mean forever, you know?" she started with a whisper.

"Ed, well, I don't need to tell you any more about him." she cut herself off when she felt his muscles tense and saw his hands curl into fists. She laid a hand over his trembling hands.

"And here, I told you about Goodwin? Ben killed him, not directly, but he knew what would happen when he sent him away. I just want to make sure that when I say it, it'll mean something."

Sawyer threaded a gentle hand through her hair. "I get it. And I still love you."

Juliet grinned and kissed him.

* * *

A week later Amy is having her baby and Sawyer is telling her that she needs to be the one to help get the baby out safely and that he believes in her. She's pulling off the grease-stained bandana and tying on a mask.

Switching her jumpsuit for scrubs.

Holding a squirming, pink baby as it screams and cries.

Crying in the hallway before she goes to tell Sawyer everyone's fine because _everyone's fine _and Amy didn't die and her baby is alive and _everyone's fine_.

And then she's making pasta in their kitchen and he come in holding a big yellow sunflower, kissing her and loving her.

So now she knows. This will mean something, it will last, and it's right. She looks at him with a smile, small and sure, and makes sure he's really listening even as her hands rest at the back of his head and she know that distracts him sometimes.

"I love you." she says quietly, evenly.

"I love you too," he just smiles at her like she's been saying it this time. And maybe she has been.

He's the only one she's felt this way about. The only one she ever wants to say this to again. And then her thought process stalls as his mouth is over hers again.

The pasta goes cold.

* * *

not my favourite, but i still like it. and your thoughts?

reviews are love!


	16. P is for Poker

a slightly longer one here, to make up for my unexplained absence, LOL.

enjoy -

**

* * *

P is for Poker**

He knew this was a bad idea.

Juliet was watching him in amusement, little smirk settled on those lips. A cool breeze travelled the room and made him shiver and the smirk widened. She looked positively wicked as she laid out her cards.

_Shit_, he knew this was a bad idea.

_It had started off innocently enough..._

"Poker!" Miles declared, throwing down a deck of cards after dinner.

Juliet smiled in that gentle, secretive way of hers and cleared hers and Daniel's plate, shaking her head a little. Sawyer just grinned, lifting his plate from the table.

Jin followed with his and Miles' plate as the other man shuffled the cards, watching them expectantly.

"Aw, come on; you're supposed to be the crack con man, you telling me you're afraid of a little poker game? Out of practice?" Miles goaded Sawyer, raising his eyebrows as Sawyer came back to the table.

"Careful ghostbuster, those are fightin' words." he warned, settling back into his chair with a grin.

"Uh-huh, right, and what about you?" Directed at Juliet now, coming back with a glass of water and a beer she handed to Sawyer.

"What about me?" she questioned with a small smile.

"That! That right there; you're so secretive and you never let anything slip, ever. Think you can play some poker?" Miles asked, wiggling the cards. He rolled his eyes as Juliet and Sawyer traded looks across the table.

"Hey, none of that; no teams, no secret little telepathic communications. Cease and desist." Miles said authoritatively, pointing back and forth between them.

"Poker is gambling, yes?" Jin said, reclaiming his seat now and looking at Miles expectantly.

"Oh, this is gonna be too easy," Miles said with a grin.

"I think I'll pass," Daniel spoke up, ignoring the fact Miles hadn't even bothered asking him. Daniel knew logically it was because Miles didn't like dealing with emotions, and Daniel was pretty emotional since Charlotte -

"Are you sure? We can be on a team, forget Miles," Juliet said, smiling up at him warmly as he rose. He couldn't help but smile a little in return; she always tried so hard to include him and he loved her for it.

"You take him, let me know when you win tomorrow," Daniel said quietly, smiling at her and turning to go down the hall to his room.

"Alright, and then there were four. Come on; we can bet chores." Miles said.

"Alright Casper, but when you're stuck doin' all the dishes, don't come cryin' to me." Sawyer said, rapping his knuckles on the table. Miles dealt him in and looked to Juliet, holding out her first card.

"Jules?"

"If you mess up the laundry, I'm not fixing it." She replied with a shrug, accepting the cards as he dealt her in too.

Jin got his cards next. "If I win, Miles do the cleaning?"

"Why is everyone so sure I'm gonna lose?" Miles questioned seriously, looking at them all.

Juliet smiled behind her cards and didn't look at any of them. "Well, not just you; I won't help James when he ruins the laundry either."

"Hey now Sweetheart, what makes you think you can outplay me?" he drawled from across the table. Juliet just kept that half-smirk on her face and rearranged her cards.

"Whatever, you're all going down." Miles commented.

And so their game began.

* * *

It took about an hour before Miles began to attempt to bow out.

"That's it. I'm done! You're all cheating!" he cried, almost knocking over his beer. They'd all lost count of how many he'd had.

"No, we're _bluffing_," Juliet laughed into her second beer. "And you're now on your fourth week of laundry duty." she said, laying out her cards triumphantly.

Sawyer and Jin were glad they had already folded and exchanged glances.

Miles groaned and let his head hit the table. "I'm out. I bow down to your poker skills Jules,"

Juliet smiled a little wider and pushed her cards into the pile forming in front of Sawyer.

"I am finish too," Jin said then, swallowing a yawn. "Shift is early in the morning," he said carefully, proud of the smile he got from Juliet for his English.

"You'll take Casper with you?" Sawyer said as Miles turned over all their cards, as if trying to find where he kept going wrong.

"I will,"

Jin struggled, but eventually helped Miles out the door, trying to explain to the inebriated man in halting English how he had lost.

"So, what do you say Blondie? Keep playin'?" He raised an eyebrow. She raised hers in return, glancing at his fourth beer. "That ain't gonna save you darlin'. I'm not that drunk."

Juliet laughed a little and nodded, holding her hand out. "Deal."

"Uh-uh, we're changin' the rules now sweetheart," his voice was low and his southern drawl more accentuated. Juliet swallowed thickly but didn't let anything show.

"How so?" she asked lightly, tilting her head to one side.

He pinned her with his gaze and smirked, knowing the next two words out of his mouth would shake her unshakeable exterior.

"_Strip_. _Poker_."

A flush bloomed over her face and her eyes widened before she could control herself. They had been spending more time together, had gotten closer; she did get the distinct feeling maybe Kate wasn't the only thing he thought about anymore, did catch him staring at her every now and then.

And she'd already had more alcohol than usual. All a great combination.

She schooled her features, even though she knew it was already too late. "Boxers or briefs?" she said in acceptance. Something flipping in her stomach as he grinned back at her, dimples peeking out from his stubble.

"Black lace or white cotton?" he returned. Damn he loved that pretty pink flush as it crept up her neck again.

"Deal, James." she said, taking a sip of her beer.

* * *

And that was how they got _here_.

"James?" she asked, playing innocent.

He practically growled at her; he was sitting there in nothing but his boxers and one sock while she was still fully dressed, save for her button up shirt. Even then she had on a perfectly respectable tank top.

"I still got one sock." he muttered, pulling it off.

"Actually, you didn't take something off the last time you lost. You went to the bathroom and thought I wouldn't notice." she grinned cheekily at him now, eyes pinning him in place.

"So, I'm down to..." he trailed off, looking over at his pile of clothes, then over at her one shirt, then up at her smirking face.

"Nothing," she supplied. It was his turn to flush now and he didn't know what to do.

"I think you should be in the same state as me, make it fair; then we can do next hand wins all," he tried. She just kept that damn infuriatingly small smile on her lips and shook her head slowly.

At least they were still at the table. "Fine," he declared. He'd just call her bluff; no way was she gonna let him sit there naked. She was too proper. So when she just sat there waiting and watching with that smile he squirmed a little. Finally she took pity and blinked slowly, licking her lips.

"Alright, we'll just say I won; and you're doing all my laundry chores when Miles gets done with his share." She amended, hiding her laugh by taking another sip of her slowly disappearing beer.

"**Fine**," he said, biting out the word.

Juliet just chuckled and watched him fish in his pile for his jeans, yank them on.

"I'm glad you're so amused darlin', this is a one time thing; no _way_ you'd beat me any other time."

Juliet nodded placatingly, still smiling. "Of course,"

"I'm serious," Sawyer pointed at her as he hopped around on one foot, pulling his jeans on.

"I'm sure you are," Juliet answered. Damn smirk.

"You know what, Capulet?" He said, letting his shirt fall from his fingers. Her eyes watched it's descent to floor and then looked up at him easily.

"What's that, Montague?" she replied evenly.

He came around the chair and leaned down over her. Her eyes slid closed as his face slid next to hers, cheeks touching, mouth by her ear. He proceeded to whisper a scenario that made her flush all over again and bite her lip.

He leaned back, pleased with himself, and brushed hair behind her red ear. "I love that pretty pink flush of yours," he commented happily.

Her face evened out, even if the blush was still there and he felt curiosity spike in him. Her hand snaked out and snagged his belt loop, using his weight to pull herself up out of her chair and up against him.

She looked into his eyes, bit her lip and smirked in satisfaction at the groan that came from him when a single finger touched his chest.

"Glad you like it," she whispered back before pulling away and disappearing down the hall before he'd even opened his eyes.

He looked down at himself and sighed. "Damn," he whispered. Another cold shower. And he still had to do laundry. How did she always manage to win?

* * *

hee.

love 'em.

reviews are love

:)


	17. Q is for Quit

sorry again for the long wait, but here's Q, R and S!

enjoy -

**

* * *

Q is for Quit**

It's a normal Saturday afternoon when Juliet comes into the kitchen and sits down across from him.

"Afternoon, sunshine. Somethin' I can help you with?" Sawyer said, glancing up from his book when she doesn't answer right away.

She looks thoughtful, but determined about whatever it is she's thinking so hard about.

"I quit."

"Excuse me?" Now he's just confused. He closes his book and looks up at her with a raised eyebrow.

"I quit. I don't care if it's the 70's and there's nothing on the mainland for me. I don't want to be here anymore. I quit. I want to leave."

There's silence in the kitchen; stunned and confused on his part and pointed on hers. She waits patiently until he can produce words again.

"Blondie, there's nothin' out there. Nobody. Nothing. You don't even have a social security number or a passport or anything like that. What are you gonna do when you get to Ann Arbour?"

Juliet looks away before meeting his eyes again with renewed determination. "I don't know. I don't care. But I can't stay on this Island anymore. I won't. I quit."

Sawyer sighs and closes his eyes for a moment. He's getting better at this, sitting still for a moment and thinking everything over before speaking instead of just reacting to whatever someone has just said or done.

He thinks that she's been getting more and more sad and distant the last few weeks. After six months, she seemed almost happy, content and accepting. But the last few weeks...

Maybe if he just let her go, she'd see there was nothing better for her out there than there was here. He wouldn't say it out loud, but namely that nothing out there that was here was him. He couldn't do this without her.

But this wasn't about him. It was about her. So.

"Alright. When are we leaving?" he asks finally.

Juliet's eyes snap to his face from the collar of his shirt and she looks confused now. Like she's shocked and disoriented that he's agreeing so readily to this and not fighting her more.

"What?"

"When do we leave? I told you, I got your back and you told me you had mine. How are we supposed to do that if you leave and I don't?"

"You'd come with me?" she sounds a mixture of touched and devastated. He's not sure how he feels about the latter.

"Of course." he says carefully, but gently. To him it's the most obvious thing in the world. They weren't together in the traditional sense of the word but they were closer than he'd been with anyone in a really long time.

No way was he giving that up because of a stupid Island. Mysterious and time-traveling or not.

"I don't know when the next sub is." she finally says, her hands come up to rest folded on the table in front of her.

"Wednesday afternoon." he says. It's Monday today. She looks surprised again. It's making him uneasy how much he can surprise her sometimes.

So they pack up the few belongings they've acquired along with their clothes and few books they don't think anyone will notice they've taken on Tuesday night. It's raining on Wednesday morning, a light drizzling rain, that makes everything seem quiet and muted.

They walk to the dock with Miles and Jin and Daniel who aren't sure whether to be more confused at the fact that Sawyer and Juliet are leaving, that they're leaving together or that Sawyer is letting them leave at all.

The three stand quietly and stop at the edge of the dock where Sawyer and Juliet are the first to arrive at the little yellow sub. Sawyer hauls the top open and gestures with a thin smile.

Juliet turns to look at her guys, because they are her guys now after months and months here, and hugs each of them tightly. She looks back at the island, pictures Amy and their pretend house, the job she had that had nothing to do with babies and their mothers dying.

And then she turns and faces Sawyer who's waiting patiently. She thinks;

He doesn't want to leave. There's nothing for him out there. Nothing for me either.

Except freedom from this island.

But it wasn't really freedom if she's still in the 70's, right? The island is still winning.

The best chance of getting back to where she was supposed to be is to stay, live here, with James. And Jin, Miles and Daniel.

But she hates this place, with everything she has in her and possibly a little more, she hates this pace. Hates the trees and the grass and the hills and the ocean, the beach, the compound, the stupid yellow houses, the Dharma logo-

But they're a crew. They have each other's backs. She can't leave them here.

Who will cook on Tuesdays and Fridays? If it's not her, Sawyer will burn something on the barbecue, or Miles will ruin all their pots or Daniel will have them all eating peanut butter and jelly three times a week.

If she left, James would follow her. Who would keep them safe? She'd be safe with James, at least until he left her (and she was sure, not matter what he said, that him leaving was definitely a possibility). Jin could fire a gun well, and Miles could defend himself, but what about Daniel?

But she just wants to go. She doesn't want to be responsible for anything any more. For anyone but herself. She doesn't want to lie and pretend to be someone she's not and carry a gun or work on cars or-

James is staring at her patiently. She's standing, one foot on the sub, her hand in his, one foot on the dock.

_Goddammit_.

"We can't leave." she says quietly. It's a realization and an admission and an admittance of defeat.

She pulls her foot back, takes her hand from his, and take a good twenty steps back from the sub as if forcing herself away from it.

Sawyer lowers the hatch top of the sub and watches Juliet turn pale and sad again. Her face goes hard and unreadable and he's so sorry he had to do it this way.

He couldn't let her leave, but he couldn't make her stay either; it had to be her choice. They had to stick together out here and them all in one place was the only way to do it.

He decides then, as he watches her hands curl tightly around the straps of her bag and turn her knuckles white, that he would show her living with him wasn't so bad.

Sawyer knew he'd changed here, living with her and the others and having people depend on him. Working security and having people (Juliet, Jin, Miles, Daniel, Horace, Amy, the security guys) believe in him without a second thought had shown him he wasn't as bad as he made himself out to be.

So he comes forward and takes the bag from her and holds it with his duffel in his left hand, takes Juliet's hand in his right, and the five of them walk back to the compound. The sun comes through the clouds and it's a sunshower; the rain falling gently and catching the rays of the sun.

They settle back in their house with none the wiser to their plans to leave, not even Horace (but Juliet doesn't know that), and Jin, Miles and Daniel leave them alone.

They sit with Sawyer's arm around Juliet's shoulders and her forehead resting gently at his neck.

"That wasn't really the next sub was it." she says quietly. It's not a question because she's already worked out the answer.

Sawyer smiles a little and starts running his fingers up and down her arm soothingly. "No,"

"That was a supply sub." she says again. Now he can hear a note of amusement in her voice.

"Yeah,"

She smiles and wraps an arm around his waist, rolls into his side. "Thank you,"

"Anytime, Blondie."

* * *

sooo maybe a liiiiittle misleading; they didn't actually quit. but i hope this makes sense because i kinda like this one.

reviews are looooove!

:)


	18. R is for Ring

may be sad, just a warning.

enjoy -

**

* * *

R is for Ring**

"When are you going to put a ring on her finger, eh Jim?" a clap on the back, a chuckle, a retreating beige-jumpsuited form.

"Wait, what?" He called, but the door was already clanging shut with a resounding bang, leaving him alone in the basement with the monitors. He looked around as if the screens would give him an answer.

Needless to say they don't.

"A ring?" he says quietly to himself. Sawyer did not buy rings. He didn't even think about rings; what the hell!

A ring. Presumably and most probably, Pete had meant a ring for Juliet. His...girlfriend? Sounded very juvenile. Lover? Like that would go over well. Significant other? Life partner?

_Jesus._

Sawyer sat down heavily in one of the chairs and scrubbed a hand over his face. True, Sawyer never thought about getting a girl a ring; but he was Jim LaFleur now. Maybe Jim LaFleur would think about getting a girl, his girl (that sounded a little better, right?), a ring.

Especially if that girl was Juliet.

Speaking of, the monitor directly in front of him caught his attention as her blonde hair caught the sun before disappearing under a bandana and under the hood of a van.

And then it hit him that maybe it wasn't something that 'Sawyer' or 'Jim LaFleur' wouldn't or shouldn't consider, but something that, he realized with startling clarity, he was. James. Just him.

He also realized he was going to end up with multiple personality disorder if he kept thinking about himself this way.

Okay. Thoughts, organize. One, this thing with Juliet is no longer a con. If it ever had been.

Two, thoughts of a ring were now entering his mind with startlingly little resistance or panic. Interesting.

Three, he was pretty sure she'd be receptive to the idea. Granted, she'd been married before and the guy was a smarmy little ass. And he himself was a conman and world-class jerk sometimes.

He sighed heavily as his mind veered off topic again. Damn.

"Hey boss,"

Sawyer whirls, not having heard the doors open or Miles' footsteps, but there the other man is, standing with eyebrows raised at the jerking movement. "What's up?"

Sawyer shook his head and frowned. "A ring?"

Miles frowned now too in confusion. "What?"

"A ring. For Juliet. Thoughts, ghostbuster?" Sawyer said, still a little foggy.

Miles let out a low whistle and smirked. "Thinking of popping the question? Can I be there when you do it?"

Sawyer leaned forward so his elbows rested on his knees, hands dangling between them. "I'm not even sure I'm gonna; I mean, Pete said somethin' about puttin' a ring on her finger and now..."

Miles nodded and crossed his arms. "The wig out. I see. So what're you thinking?"

Sawyer reclined now, mouth quirked to one side. "I don't know."

"Oh, come on; the con man not thinking about his next move? Try again Tarzan."

Sawyer glared at Miles and Miles shrugged. "What, you're the only one with nicknames?"

"This ain't a con, at least not anymore."

Miles nodded again with a growing smirk. "I know. And I think by now you've realized it wasn't really a con before either, right?"

"Get outta my head ghost whisperer." Sawyer said halfheartedly. He was staring at the screen again, where Juliet was taking a break and drinking from a water bottle.

"You think she'd say yes?"

Miles considered it a moment. "I think she'd say yes."

Sawyer nodded and before he could censor himself, a plan started to form...

* * *

It would be during the Christmas celebrations, he decided, with the bright twinkling lights and decorations, the tree, the presents, all of it. Dharmaville had a party every year and it was always fun.

He would take Juliet's hand, lead her out around the back of the party where he'd already have soft Christmas lights set up. Mistletoe would dangle from the strands and he'd pull her into a kiss she would laugh through happily.

At this time of night, soft Christmas carols would spill from the party inside and he would wrap his arms around her, sway to the music, feel her smile against his neck and her hands holding onto him.

He would kiss her temple, her forehead, mouth, and she would smile in that way of hers. And then he would become aware of the box heavy in his pocket, where he's sure she's felt it. She wouldn't know what it is though.

She would watch him carefully, lovingly, as he took her hands in his and squeezed once. Her eyes would widen and fill with tears as he sank to one knee in the grass and pulled the little box from his pocket.

He would say his speech, without hesitation or joke, and she would cry and whisper a watery 'yes' through trembling lips.

She would lower herself in front of him and kiss him and they would go home together, spend their lives, wherever they were, together...

* * *

That was the plan. Within the month he had picked out a ring and showed Amy, gotten her approval with a crushing hug. He'd stashed the ring under the floorboards in their bedroom because he was that paranoid that he would either lose it or Juliet would find it accidentally.

"You look worried," Juliet told him that night.

Sawyer snapped out of his thoughts, his mind down the hall on the little box under the floor.

"Sorry sweetheart, just thinkin'," he smiled at her and she smiled back, tilted her head.

"About what?" she asked curiously. She brought him a beer and sat next to him with her own. He immediately pulled her against his side, an arm over her shoulders. She settled against him easily.

"None of your business, darlin'," he replied with a chuckle and she shook her head with a grin and took a sip of her beer.

"Alright, if you say so,"

Sawyer never did it often (even in the beginning), compare Juliet to Kate, but when he did, Juliet always came out on top (even in the beginning). Kate probably would have pushed and poked him into telling her whatever it was and he would probably not tell her just for the sake of seeing her angry. She would get angry and go do something stupid that would piss him off before coming running back to him. He had to admit, the passion, the volatile chemistry; as bad as it was for them and everyone involved, it was amazing.

With Juliet, though, she trusted him. She didn't need to know everything, believed he would tell her if she needed to know. She waited patiently and eventually he wanted to tell her, to share it with her. To him, that passion was greater. It was love. It was a different kind of chemistry, one that said they fit together perfectly. She would be the rock keeping him grounded and he in turn made her come out of her comfort zone a little, have more fun.

"It's a surprise," he grumbled against her neck. He saw her flush.

"For me?" she guessed quietly. He smiled against her skin and she flushed deeper. "What is it?"

"Well that would ruin the surprise now, wouldn't it?" he teased. He took her beer and set it and his own down on the table. He turned to her.

She raised an eyebrow at him but was smiling. "What?" she asked when he just stared.

"You're extraordinary, that's all." he said. She smiled and kept eye contact with him, even though he knew it killed her to take a compliment.

"You're pretty great yourself," she said back in her soft voice.

He grinned now. "What, you get 'extraordinary' and I just get 'pretty great'?"

Juliet laughed and shook her head. "Well, I could give you something else," she trailed off.

Sawyer laughed too and hauled her across the couch to him, sealing their mouths together.

* * *

The next morning, Jin calls. It's early and Juliet's still asleep, skin glowing in the morning sun. He braces a hand on her back to answer.

In a matter of seconds, it feels like, Juliet is dead, buried on the island she said she'd never escape from, he's sitting on that goddamn dock holding that goddamn ring, talking to Kate about how he was going to propose.

Goddamn Pete.

But he knew, as soon as that ring - Juliet's ring - hit the water, he would have gotten here just the same if Pete had never said anything. He also knew he regretted throwing that little piece of her into the ocean. He took a shuddering breath and turned, leaving Kate crying on the dock, and went back to their house. His and Juliet's.

* * *

guh. i couldn't resist the ending. but there it is.

reviews are love!

:)


	19. S is for Shirtless

as you can tell by the title, a little less sad and more fun ;)

enjoy -

**

* * *

S is for Shirtless**

"Hey Juliet." Amy came up to Juliet as the blonde sat on her porch, reclining with an iced tea. She took a seat on the step next to her and looked up expectantly at her.

"Juliet?"

Amy followed Juliet's focused eyes across a short distance where the off-duty security members were playing a pick-up game of touch football. Miles and Jin were huddling with the rest of their team, some of them with sweaty shirts, others sweaty bare backs, coming up with strategy.

"The guys finally getting around to that game they've been batting about?" Amy tried again, but Juliet didn't answer, her eyes focused on Miles and Jin's huddle. "Are you okay?"

Juliet didn't respond and Amy waved a hand in front of her face, snapping her fingers. "Julie!"

Juliet flinched and blinked a couple times before noticing Amy. "Amy! I'm sorry, were you saying something?" Confused blue eyes turned on her and Amy was looking at her curiously.

"Are you okay? I've been calling you for like, two minutes," Amy raised an eyebrow as Juliet's attention was drawn back to the huddle as they broke for their play. She scanned the guys in the vicinity of Juliet's stare and couldn't hold back her smirk as Sawyer emerged from the cover of the other men.

"Oh," she drew out the syllable with a suggestive tone, nudging Juliet's shoulder. "I see what's got your attention." Amy figured she was talking to herself by now as Sawyer caught the ball and took off running.

"Sorry?" Juliet said distantly, watching Sawyer run down the length of the make-shift field, dodging men with ease. Amy trailed her own eyes over Sawyer's shirtless torso and even caught Juliet bite her lip when he turned and they caught sight of his front.

"Hm, see something you like sweetie?"

"Sure," Juliet answered offhandedly, like she hadn't really heard the question. The sun beat down on them and Amy leaned back on the step, fanning herself and grinning, deciding to have a little fun.

"So you admit it, finally? You'd like to have that leaning over you right now, wouldn't you?"

"Yeah, okay." Juliet kept saying as Sawyer ducked back into the huddle. "Wait, what?" as he disappeared from view.

Amy laughed now and shook her head. "You've got it bad, Jules." She bit her lip as she watched Juliet's face twist up in confusion, looking from the huddle and back to her friend.

"What were you talking about? I completely zoned out, I'm so sorry," Amy waved her off, grin still in place.

"Oh, don't worry about it; I'd be distracted too if I had the hots for Jim and he was walking around half naked and glistening with sweat."

"Amy!"

"What?" Amy replied innocently, reaching over to take a sip from Juliet's sweating glass of iced tea. "Don't deny it Jules, I see it; everyone sees it. You're even starting to see it," she chuckled at her joke.

"He doesn't see me that way. We're friends. Crew. That's it." Juliet tried. The huddle was breaking up again.

"You live together." Amy pointed out as Juliet's eyes were drawn back to Sawyer. Amy smiled slowly.

"You can't take your eyes off him." she continued as Juliet watched the play get stopped by the other team. They huddled again.

"You obviously get distracted by him." Amy nudged her again and Juliet forced her eyes back to Amy.

"That doesn't mean anything. Besides, he was, he had," she didn't know how to explain this to Amy without blowing their secret. "There was someone, he left, before here."

Amy nodded and watched something flick across Juliet's face, quick as a shadow and gone before she could put a name to it. "Well, I think he's over her, honey." she said with a grin.

Juliet wasn't looking at the huddle anymore, or Amy for that matter, but something in the middle, lost in thought.

"He can't take his eyes off you either. And you distract him." Amy said. Sawyer's team tried again for a touchdown, but they failed because Sawyer was distracted, looking at something in their general direction.

Amy took in her friend's attire; cotton shorts stopping just millimetres from being indecent, fitted navy tank top, sandals, glass of sweating iced tea. Hair falling from a ponytail, face flushed from the extreme heat. Amy sighed, damn her friend was hot. If only Juliet could see herself that way.

Suddenly Sawyer was in front of them, drawing Juliet's eyes away from whatever she was lost in. Amy watched as their eyes took each other in, like she wasn't even there.

"You're distractin' me sunshine," he said lowly. Juliet licked her lips. "Sorry. Should I not watch?"

Sawyer grinned and Amy saw Juliet's face flush. This time from a different source of heat. "Don't even think about it Blondie, you're my lucky charm,"

Juliet smiled a little and held up her glass. Sawyer took it and, with eyes locked on hers, took deep swigs from it, draining half the glass easily, before handing it back to her. His hand, wet from sweat and the condensation on the glass, touched Juliet's red cheek.

"You're lookin' a little flushed sweetheart,"

Juliet tilted her head to one side, away from his hand, with a small smile. "It is hot out here, James."

His other hand touched her other cheek, both slid back into her hair, messing it up anymore, leaned down until his lips were so close to hers Amy couldn't breathe herself. Juliet's eyes were locked on his until his hands came down from her hair and settled so he was holding her jaw, tilting her head how he wanted her.

"Not the only thing that's hot I see," he smirked, watching in satisfaction as her eyes closed. Her lip pinked nicely under her teeth as she bit it carefully.

Amy couldn't believe what was happening not three feet from her face. "You know James," Juliet said quietly, eyes still closed. "You do look hot yourself."

Sawyer chuckled low, and Amy gulped. "You think Blondie?" he tilted her head back so his lips just barely touched hers when he spoke next. "What're you gonna do about it?"

Juliet smiled and licked her lips. She licked his too. "Cool you off," her big blue eyes opened and he was momentarily distracted. He jerked back as cold liquid rushed down his head and neck, quickly rolling over his back. "Hey!"

Juliet was laughing now, holding her empty glass. "Good luck," she smiled sweetly, tilting her head to one side again.

Amy saw Juliet's eyes travel Sawyer's dripping chest and when she looked over at Sawyer, could see him smirk and shake out his hair and let his eyes roam over Juliet as well.

He went back to his huddle. Juliet put down her empty glass.

Amy marveled at the fact both looked thoroughly kissed, ravished even, without actually pressing their mouths together.

"Does that happen every time Jim's shirtless?" Amy managed, fanning herself in earnest now.

Juliet smiled a little as Sawyer rejoined the game. "Hm," the sound was non-committal.

"It so does," Amy sighed, leaning against the step. "Damn," she breathed.

* * *

just because we i love shirtless sawyer :)

reviews are love!

:)


	20. T is for Tequila

helloooo people! it's STUDY WEEK for me which means updates for you!

enjoy -

**

* * *

T is for Tequila**

A year and a half. They'd been stuck here a year and a half. Juliet still knew exactly when each and every sub was due at the dock and was acutely aware when it, or any people, left. Sometimes she would sit by the dock and watch the people come and go until the stupid thing submerged and left again.

It took almost a year for hers and Sawyer's relationship to go from a strained trust to a deep friendship and then something more. Although, at times like these, with the night folding in around her and the stars beginning to glitter in the sky, she always sees that it would have happened this way no matter what.

He's kind. Considerate. He thinks of her and says and does little things that make her smile and blush and feel so much like she hasn't in so long. Not to mention he was way too good looking for his own good.

But all this is not what's on her mind right now because Amy had dropped off a bottle of tequila earlier for a celebration they ended up not going to. She'd found a glass and sat on the dock, watching the moonlight on the waves.

She refused to admit it was making her sick.

James found her eventually, he always does, and sits next to her, watching her face casually.

"How many shots you had Blondie?" he asks when he sees her light alcoholic flush. She shakes her head and waves him off with her empty glass before pouring another.

"There's strength in numbers." she says, quite clearly, before taking her shot. She doesn't protest when Sawyer takes the bottle because she knows he's going to drink with her.

He poured a shot and took it before setting the bottle down on his other side where she couldn't get at it and handing the glass back to her. She looked around, a little confused, for the tequila.

He heard her sigh and grinned a little when the glass landed with a thunk on the wood next to him. "Fine." she muttered.

"What's goin' on?" he asked now.

"Do you think she thinks I'm dead?" Juliet asked quietly after a long moment, staring out over the water with a thoughtful expression.

Sawyer shook his head. "I don't think she'll give up 'til she sees your body, from what you've told me about her."

Juliet thought this over and nodded a little, reaching for the empty glass and twirling it in her hands. He lays a hand over her thigh and she feels like she's going to cry.

"Hey," he calls her and she turns to look. She frowns as he presses his lips to hers.

He hates the pained look on her face when he kisses her. He pulls back and the frown is still there, even as she bites her lip with her eyes still gently closed. Even as she pulls him back to her. He puts it down as her feeling guilty for being happy here. At least, that's what he tells himself.

"I love you, you know that?" She whispers against his mouth.

He pulls back and smooths his thumbs over her forehead until it stops frowning and then kisses her nose, her cheeks where her dimples came out, her now smiling lips. "I know."

"And?" she chuckles as his arm settles around her, the tequila forgotten.

"I love you back," he grins.

* * *

I'm realizing I have a slight problem with tenses...hm...

LOL

reviews are love!

:)


	21. U is for Umbrella

here's U!

enjoy -

* * *

**U is for Umbrella**

_'When the sun shine, we'll shine together, told you I'll be here forever, said I'll always be your friend, took an oath I'ma stick it out to the end, now that's raining more than ever, know that we still have each other, you can stand under my umbrella, you can stand under my umbrella.'_

They're sitting in the church, surrounded by everyone they've lost. They're alive (_or some version of it_) and they have each other and they're hands are tightly clasped and they're not letting go.

They sit next to each other and wait (_they're not entirely sure for what_) and smile.

Then there's a flash of light and they're alone in a house (_one that looks exactly like their little yellow home from 70's Dharmaville_) and they keep smiling and there are tears.

It takes a few days, but they figure out that they're in some form of afterlife, mostly because they recognize people on the news that have already died (_and also because Jack and Kate live four blocks away and Miles lives across the street and Jin and Sun live next door_).

They believe they have their happily ever after now, and they couldn't be happier; Miles and Jin come over all the time and they have barbecues and almost burn their eyebrows off and Sun and Juliet become closer, forgetting the history the island put between them.

James and Miles are godfathers to Ji Yeon and Juliet is a godmother.

They try not to think about the fact that Jin and Sun's little girl is in their afterlife too.

The first thing that truly gets to them is when Rachel and Julian show up at their front door.

Since ignoring Ji Yeon's appearance with Sun and Jin (_because they've all, theoretically, died and have moved on_), they've stopped overthinking everything; people who are supposed to be here with them are. It's some kind of magic of the island they're becoming okay with that.

At least until Rachel shows up with Julian and a tear-filled smile. Julian is five, almost six years old and somehow he knows exactly who his Aunt Juliet is and runs into her stunned arms and holds her tight.

Rachel follows behind her son and they're a hugging, crying, sobbing mess. James stands back with a single tear in his eye and watches Juliet happier than he's ever seen her.

She introduces him and Rachel engulfs him in a bone crushing hug, whispering a heartfelt 'thank you' in his ear. They sit down in the living room, Juliet between Rachel and James, Julian chattering to the adults happily and playing with his aunt's fingers.

Later that night, when Rachel and Julian are asleep in the guest room (that they've been trying to figure out what to do with), Juliet cries and James holds her closely, their bodies touching from sternum to toes. He holds her and runs a hand through her hair and Juliet eventually smiles up at him and he kisses her.

It rains a week later when Rachel finally explains that the last thing she remembers is a pair of headlights on a dark night coming home from Julian's friend's birthday party. The sisters cry again but Julian has them smiling again when he comes in on James' back, both of them laughing and shouting.

Jin comes in with Ji Yeon and there's a surprise when Daniel comes in with Charlotte.

The fear that the island will claim them again is slowly receding and they relax into their lives.

They've stopped counting the number of days they've been here but they think it's been a little over a year. They celebrate an anniversary and eat amazing food in a fancy restaurant.

The next day, James goes off to the precinct where he's a cop (_completely by choice and based on those moments leading up to remembering Juliet, and he still has small panic attacks about how the hell he could have not known her_). Juliet goes off to the hospital where she's a doctor and a researcher (_even though Edmund is long dead, thanks to a bus, he's not in their afterlife, which Juliet is eternally grateful for_). And they come home together at the end of the day.

James is reading in bed when Juliet comes out holding a thin white stick, a glowing smile on her flushed cheeks and he raises an eyebrow, takes his glasses off his face.

She calms her face a little and walks slowly towards him, the stick dangling from her fingers.

He takes it from her and finally breaks their eye contact, looks down at the little pink plus sign.

James smiles a little, a loving, wonderful, completely content smile, before dropping the stick onto their bedspread and pulling her by the waist over his lap. The book is discarded and she laughs as he pulls her against him, pressing his mouth to hers and then over her cheek, her ear and down her neck.

She's laughing breathlessly and his hands are moving over her and then one is gone, fumbling in a drawer and she's breathless for a different reason.

It's not what she thinks. He pulls his hand back from the drawer and stops his assault on her body. She settles against him with a smile before her eyes are drawn to the little black velvet box in his palm.

They both cry when she says yes and he puts the pregnancy test on the bedside table next to the empty ring box.

That night, they fall asleep spooned (_which is a comfortable, usual occurrence_) with James' hand draped protectively over her still flat stomach and her hand (_the left one glittering softly in the moonlight filtering in through the curtains_) curled around the arm over her waist.

They're home.

* * *

i hope the song and fic make sense as being connected!

reviews are LOVE!

:)


	22. V is for Valentine

enjoy -

**

* * *

V is for Valentine**

He hated this day.

He hated the stupid amounts of money, the overpriced cards, flowers and cheesy commercials. He hated all the pink and red, the ugly stuffed animals with hearts for eyes and preprogrammed, disgustingly sweet sayings.

What he hated most was how much people expected of each other. If you loved someone so much, you should show it all year, not just on Valentine's Day. He'd always felt that way, from the first time his classmates had exchanged cards in school.

As an adult though, he couldn't deny the perks of Valentine's Day for a con man. Fat, lazy husbands and their rich wives; a little chocolate, some flowers, bubbly champagne in tall flutes and the women were hooked.

To top off the stupid holiday, he'd woken up that morning hungover (from consuming what he realized now was just a stupid amount of beer on an empty stomach) thinking of a curly haired brunette with green eyes.

Would they have made it work if he'd stayed on that helicopter? Would she expect flowers or chocolate? Would they-

A soft knock pulled him from his musings. He knew who was on the other side of the door; living with the other four of them in one small house for those first two weeks taught him enough about his crew to tell them apart without looking.

"What?" he grumbled out, swinging his legs over the side and picking the book up off the bedside table to make it look like he was doing something other than wallowing in his hangover thoughts of Kate.

Juliet's pale hand came into view first, closely followed by the rest of her, still in her pajamas. The hand not resting on his doorknob was behind her back. There was a small smile on her face.

"Somethin' I can do for you Blondie?" he asked. His tone was gruffer than normal. It was the stupid day. Stupid Valentine's Day. It doesn't deter her and the smile remains.

"No, just wanted to say good morning, and um," Sawyer's eyes widened a little before he raised an eyebrow at her stuttering. Juliet never hesitated, not over something like saying good morning.

Unless she was going to do something he wasn't going to like.

"Cat got your tongue?" he teased when she bit her lip.

They'd been living together, in separate bedrooms, just the two of them for the past seven months. So far with no major loss of limb. He got the feeling that was about to change.

Juliet smiled a little wider at him and pulled her hand out from behind her back. A little yellow flower rested between her fingers. She came just into the room when he didn't speak right away with careful, slow steps.

He looked from the flower to her gently smiling face and back before he locked eyes with her.

"That supposed to be for me darlin'?" he said. His tone was gentler, a bit teasing. She smiled wider and edged further into the room, bare toes drawing his attention for a brief moment.

When the hell had she gone from being a scary, mysterious Other to this barefooted woman with a cute smile? Cute? Had he really just thought that? In relation to Juliet? Oh fuck.

He shook his head when she came to a stop in front of him, the flower stretched out towards him. Sawyer sighed a little and took it. She clasped her hands behind her back and watched him twirl the stem in his larger fingers.

"What's this for?"

"It's Valentine's Day." she said simply, still watching him. "Happy Valentine's Day."

"You know I don't got nothin' for you," he said, still watching the little yellow petals as they spun between his fingers. If he'd looked up, he would have seen the look of slight nervousness on her face.

"That's okay. It's not what today's about. I think we can move past the grunting and mumbling and call ourselves friends. So happy Valentine's Day."

Sawyer couldn't stop the sharp retort on his tongue. "You grunt and mumble Blondie?" he said instead, swallowing what he wanted to say.

Juliet laughed and went to leave. "Sure, when I feel like channeling my inner James."

"You not get enough of these from your husband?" he said curiously. He watched her freeze in the doorway, hand gripping the frame tightly.

"What?" she asked quietly, not turning around. Now her voice sounds like the scary, mysterious Other.

"Your husband. I heard you talking to Amy about you being married before we 'crashed'," he made quote fingers and stood from the bed, dropping the flower on his pillow.

"He got me flowers, at first." she said after a tense few moments of silence. She turned her head a little so he could just see her profile. "Then he didn't." she turned back to the doorway and left.

He didn't know why, but Sawyer felt something tug at his stomach. He turned back and picked up the flower resting on the pillow, twirled it and stared at where Juliet used to be.

"Hm," he said.

* * *

That night, he came upon Juliet in their living room reading a book with a can of Dharma cola in front of her.

He held his hand behind his back, just as she had that morning, and rapped his knuckles on the table. She looked up at him in surprise and smiled slightly.

"James," she folded her page over and set it down. "Something I can help you with," she teased.

He grinned and brought his hand forward, a bright yellow sunflower in his hand. Her smile froze and her eyes fell on the yellow flower. She bit her lip.

"Happy Valentine's Day darlin',"

He watched in surprised satisfaction as her face lit up and she smiled big, taking the flower from him. She brought the flower to her nose and looked up at him.

"Happy Valentine's Day, James."

Maybe this Valentine's Day business wasn't such a bad thing after all.

* * *

reviews are LOVE!

:)


	23. W is for Want

Alright peeps, a couple things here and please **READ THIS** before continuing:

1) this dips into a higher rating category: maybe T or above for slight sexual situations, not overly explicit or graphic. I'm trusting you guys to read this warning and stop reading when you see it start getting more mature if you don't want to read it. Also, there is swearing (one obvious, the other less so) - again, not explicit and it's not in a crude way, I'm sorry if it offends you, but fair warning.

2) there is a companion piece to this and it's posted below as well under a line break and can be read separate or as part of this fic in a larger picture

3) i hope you enjoy :)

**

* * *

W is for Want**

_"And how can I, stand here with you, and not be moved by you?...'Cause you're all I want, you're all I need, you're everything, everything." -Lifehouse_

James looked out over the water from his seat on the dock. The wood was rough under his hands but he was lost in thought.

Two years. Two years tomorrow. Daniel had left for Ann Arbour a little over three months ago and he knew that Jin, Miles and Juliet had stopped counting the days they'd been here long ago.

He heaved a sigh and settled back against one of the left over empty crates from the last shipment. Two years. Two years since he'd jumped from that chopper, since the freighter exploded, since they'd started skipping _through fucking time_, since they'd been tossed around through decades like they were in some goddamn science fiction movie, since...

Soft footfalls broke through his rapidly darkening thoughts. Two years since he'd been stranded here with Juliet...

James felt her sit next to him, leaning against the perpendicular side of the crate. She didn't say anything, but then she rarely had to these days. He could see her jean-clad legs pull up to her chest out of the corner of his eye.

"Been lookin' for me, Blondie?" he asked casually. Juliet usually found him when he wandered off. It rarely, if ever, bothered him anymore. That and she seemed to know when he really needed to be alone and when he actually needed company. How did she know that when he never did?

"Just making sure you don't get hit by a flaming arrow," came her soft voice. It had a teasing note to it.

This was close to their usual script. He would ask a question he already knew the answer to when she eventually found him and she would lighten the mood by tossing back a reply like that.

"I think I'm safe by the water darlin'," he said back with a small smile.

He heard a soft chuckle and smiled a little. She stayed quiet and he breathed deep; the scent of the ocean and the jungle was touched by the scent of her. He smiled wider.

"You didn't come home for dinner," she finally said quietly. Juliet's words were careful, when she did talk in these moments.

It was such a domestic and housewife-ish thing to say, especially coming from Juliet (who could probably outshoot and take down any man in the DI), that he chuckled. She turned at this and he grinned back at her, tilting his head to face her.

She smiled a little and shook her head. "What?"

"Nothin'," he said, reaching out for her hand. She folded their fingers together and he tugged gently until she shuffled around to sit next to him. He lifted his arm over her shoulder and pulled her close.

"What is it?" Juliet asked now, curiously look up at him as their feet bumped against each other over the water.

"Nothin'," he replied honestly, turning his face to catch her lips with his. She smiled into their kiss and allowed him to deepen it gently. His hand came up behind her neck and carefully held her there and her hand braced on his thigh.

This was nothing new, they'd kissed before and kissed often (it started off as either hard and rough or sweet and soft depending on what the occasion warranted and progressed into everything in between the two) and that was as far as it ever went.

James had conned countless women and had thought he loved Kate and Juliet had been married but this was the closest either had felt to another person.

He pulled back and felt a tug in his gut as Juliet's eyes remained closed, her cheeks flushed and lips parted, and kissed her closed eyelids. She smiled at him and opened her eyes to look at him.

Seemingly reading the other's mind, they stood up together and laced their fingers together.

_Find me here, speak to me  
I want to feel you, I need to hear you  
You are the light, that's leading me  
To the place where I find peace again  
_

They got back home and James pushed the door closed behind them. When he turned back to Juliet, he saw her leaning against the doorframe into the kitchen, arms folded over her stomach, looking for all the world like a teenager on her first date.

She smiled nervously up at him. He came towards her and smoothed hands up and down her arms. She relaxed and pressed her mouth to his.

"I really like you, you know that?" James said quietly against her lips. He felt her smile and kiss him again, hands unfolding to settle easily at his back.

"I really like you too." she said when they came up for air minutes or hours later.

James took her hand and led Juliet down the hall to the bedrooms and let her pull him into his.

This was new.

She dropped his hand and moved further into the room, pulling the drapes closed and flicking off the bedside lamp.

He watched from the doorframe as she turned slowly to face him with a small smile. He grinned back and toed off his shoes and socks. She did the same.

James crossed the room slowly and when he reached Juliet, he stroked a hand down her cheek gently. She smiled up at him and her fingers inched up under the hem of his button-up. This was new too.

He followed her lead and slid his hands under the hem of her light cotton t-shirt, ghosting rough fingers over her skin. She smiled and lifted her hands, pulling his shirt up and off, pressing a kiss to his mouth when the material fell free over his shoulders.

Juliet reached for his jeans next and his hands over hers stilled her. "I may just more'n like you," he said lowly.

She smiled wider and moved again, unbuttoning them and lowering the zipper carefully. He shimmied them off and stood in just his boxers and Juliet looked up at him again, waiting.

James lowered his lips to hers again and slid his hands around her waist under her shirt, skimming his fingers up her spine until he hit the clasp of her bra. He didn't undo it. Juliet smiled into his mouth.

He lifted her shirt and grinned at her when her hair fell in waves over her face when the shirt came free of her. She laughed a little as he gently smoothed the wayward strands back off her face and kissed him thoroughly, hands at his waist again, as his moved to explore the newly exposed skin.

James felt Juliet stiffen slightly when his fingers found the button on her jeans. He pulled back and looked her in the eye, seeing what she didn't necessarily want him to see. He understood her about as much as she understood him, and that was saying something.

So he maneuvered her down onto the bed carefully, until she was on her back, and settled over her with his elbows bracing his upper half and his legs off to one side of her.

Juliet licked her lips and pulled him down again. He slid his tongue into her mouth and she may have groaned lightly. Something zinged through her stomach and made her pull back again, fingers threading through his now unruly hair.

James grinned down at her and kissed her cheek and reached for the button on her jeans, popping it open before she could stop him. She flushed and he kissed the other cheek and then went back to her lips.

When she relaxed again, he carefully and slowly lowered the zipper, the sound the only other thing audible in the world to them aside from their slightly frantic breathing. Juliet looked up at him as James hooked his fingers into the belt loops and pulled the material down until he had to get off of her to pull them off completely.

She bit her lip.

He tossed aside the jeans and lay on his side again, pressed right up against her, before laying a hand on her opposite hip and turning her body so she was on her side facing him too. She looked a little confused and James kissed the tip of her nose.

"I know you ain't ready yet, even though you want to be. Even though you think you should be," he whispered in that deep voice of his, full of understanding. Juliet's face softened and smoothed into a smile that made James feel warm all over.

Her hand came up and touched his chest before running down his stomach and around to his back, just feeling him. His came back to her hip, thumb smoothing over the hip bone, before coming up her sides and into her hair. He pulled her into a sweet kiss before shuffling closer, so they touched almost everywhere, and shared her pillow.

"I trust you," she said, mostly because she did and partly because he'd said something first.

James shifted then, managing to get the covers (his were never tucked in so he could hook the sheet with his foot) up and over their still partially-clothed before his hand rested over her back. His thumb rubbed gentle circles on her back.

"You've taken care of me from day one it seems. I trust you too." he said with a grin. She kissed him again and then they just lay there, together, hands barely touching skin and just barely brushing the remaining fabric between them.

Two years suddenly seemed like no time at all.

_You calm the storms, and you give me rest_  
_You hold me in your hands, you won't let me fall_  
_You steal my heart, and you take my breath away

* * *

_

**Companion** -

_You've taken care of me from day one it seems..._

Juliet thought back to what James had been talking about, when he had gone through what she determined were the five stages of grief.

He had searched doggedly every day for hours those first two weeks for any sign that Locke or any of the others had come back. As the months passed, he searched on weekends and days off, relentlessly moving from grid to grid around the compound and radiating out. In total he spent seven months straight doing this until Juliet told him he was in **denial**. He didn't believe her.

The disbelief, and her quiet intervention and confrontation, quickly spiraled into **anger**. He would come back to the house he shared now with just her and yell. He would throw things or pick fights (that she sometimes fell into) or smash plates. Juliet took it all because she'd been through this herself during her first stay in the Dharma Initiative.

He never hurt her though, and she stayed by his side as he moved into **bargaining**. Juliet had caught him, one night, sitting on the porch with a beer looking for all the world like he'd given up. He told her that he would _never_ con another person, that he would _stop _searching like a maniac and stop being _so angry_ at her if they would _just come back_.

Juliet told him it didn't matter what he did or didn't do. If they weren't coming back, then they weren't coming back. This hit him hard and the following weeks were spent in his version of **depression**. He withdrew from them, only interacting to snap angrily. He would eat alone and do his temp job alone and he would walk through the jungle to the docks alone.

He never stopped her from following him every time though. Sometimes he would just leave the house and within a few minutes, Juliet was following him. When Sawyer sat on the dock, staring out over the dark ocean, she was there too. Juliet never touched him, never said anything, and neither did he.

Eventually, Sawyer started waiting for her. He would say something about needing air and would wait at the door while Juliet pulled her work boots on and they would leave the house together. Most days by this point they ended up at the dock, sitting on left over crates, watching the moon ripple in the water. One night, he shifted just a few inches over and his thigh pressed firmly against hers. They both sighed a little in relief then, like the burden they'd both been carrying was spread across them now and easier to carry. A few weeks later he reached for her hand, just to help her up, and neither let go.

And then Sawyer started answering automatically to Jim (from the DI folk) and James (only from Juliet) and waiting for Juliet on the off days that he was done before her and sharing meals with her in their little house.

He gave up the grid search and didn't think of it again. They shared their first of many kisses

He picked a flower for Juliet on her birthday that first year and she grilled him the perfect steak on his...

**Acceptance.

* * *

**

Reading week means being able to write until 1:30 in the morning and not feeling guilty about it when the sun comes up!

This was probably the longest chapter EVER and I would really appreciated feedback! But you already know what I'm going to type right? All together now:

**reviews are love :)**


	24. X is for Xena

Yes, you read it right, Xena. I am a Xena fan, not obsessive mind you, just a fan; this is inspired by a quote from an episode.

enjoy -

**

* * *

X is for Xena**

_"It's hard to be alone."_

_"You're not alone."_

If you asked James when he and Juliet truly became friends, he would say he didn't know. And it wouldn't be a lie; to him, it was a slow progression from a simmering hatred to a bond nobody seemed to be able to get in on. A bunch on small things, he would say if you really pressed him, one of them being when he started answering to James when she called him.

If you asked Juliet, she would say one of two things; either the night when James convinced her, when nobody else could, to stay those first two weeks and not leave on the next sub or when she finally had enough and snapped at them all at dinner one night and he came looking for her...

* * *

Miles sat in shock at the dinner table, beer can still halfway to his mouth, as Juliet shoved her chair back and stormed out of the house following a full three minutes of yelling about things he didn't understand.

Something about being stuck here _again_, without her family _again_, not able to leave _again_, because some** idiot** had convinced her to stay _again_ and being in an ugly yellow house _again_...

The door slammed shut with a resounding bang and silence filled the small room. Sawyer stared at his plate like it had the answers, Jin looked down at the fork in his hand and Daniel folded his hands and braced his elbows on the table, leaning his forehead on his laced fingers.

"Does anyone know what that was about?" Miles finally asked after a few long moments of silence.

Sawyer sighed and leaned back in his chair tiredly.

"We make sure, Juliet okay, right?" Jin forced out. He was getting better under Juliet's carefully instruction, but when he was doubtful, like now, it got difficult to remember.

"I'm not going after an angry woman. That does not lead to good things," Miles replied, looking over at the closed door. He lowered his beer can though and sighed, a sign to the others that even though his words sounded slightly caustic he cared.

"I'll go," Daniel said quietly. He and Juliet had formed a friendship based mostly on the fact that she was the only one who seemed to understand him those first few weeks after Charlotte...

"Nah, I got her, you guys clean up for her," Sawyer grumbled. His slightly concerned look was also a sign that, like Miles, even though he sounded gruff the sentiment was sincere.

It took him a while, but he found her on a swing in the playground behind the school. Her shoes were kicked off and her bare toes were buried in the sand as she swayed gently. He paused as her hand darted up to her cheek to swipe away a tear.

When her back stiffened, he knew he'd been caught out and he continued towards the swing set.

"Quite the show back there, Blondie," he said casually, taking the swing next to hers.

"Yeah, well," was all she muttered. Her foot came up and kicked at the sand. She wouldn't look at him

"You going to tell me what it was for?" he asked. She pushed her feet back into the sand and he waited for an answer.

"No," she finally said.

"You know I got your back, right? And you can, you know, talk to me," it sounded uncomfortable and he knew it. What seemed worse, Juliet knew it too and she scoffed a little but didn't respond.

"You know that, right?" he reiterated. She sighed and nodded.

"Yes,"

"Okay. So why the wig out?" he asked. He grinned at her slight chuckle at his choice of words, but she still didn't turn to face him.

"Nothing." she said.

He could hear something in her voice that he didn't like. Something like disappointment and sadness and a touch of giving up.

"I guess we're in for a long night then, 'cause we ain't leavin' 'til you tell me," he tried again, pushing his swing so he swayed a little.

She sighed again and leaned her head against one of her chains.

They sat in silence for a long few minutes until Juliet spoke again. "This is going to drive you up the wall. You can't out-silence me, James."

Sawyer grinned and he caught a flash of her blue eyes when she turned to take it in before turning away. "I'm learnin', Blondie," he said.

She chuckled again and he laughed a little too. Least she wasn't hitting him.

"I hate it here," she said, long minutes later.

"The swings ain't so bad," Sawyer joked gently, trying to get her to turn and look at him. It worked and she turned in her swing so he could see her face. It was flushed and her eyes were bright with tears.

"I hate it here on the _island._ I don't, I **can't**, be here anymore. And you and Miles and Jin have all these little inside jokes, which are fine, I don't mind and even Daniel is finding colleagues if not friends at the research labs," she paused to take a breath. This is the most he's heard her say at once in a long time. "You all go out into the jungle together to search and tell me to stay here because you know I have the most level head and what if you didn't come back?"

Sawyer's followed her so far until the last six words. _What if you didn't come back?_ "What?"

Juliet swallows thickly and licks her lips before speaking. "What if you flash out of here and I don't? I've been here on my own before, and for so long after it seems, and I can't do it again,"

"We ain't goin' any-"

"I just got tired. You all seem to be doing better with all this and I'm just," she takes a breath. "not,"

Sawyer waits a bit longer.

"It's hard to be alone," she says quietly.

"I've got your back," he says firmly. He believes it, well and truly believes it and intends to honour it too.

She chuckles a little.

"You're not alone," he says now. It seems to be the right thing to say because there are tears sliding down her cheeks but she's not hiding them from him anymore. She reaches out a pale hand and he takes it carefully.

They sit there, holding hands across the sand, in their swings in the dark. A cool breeze drifts over them and they bury their toes in the sand.

"Feel better?" he asks sometime later.

She looks over at him and nods, squeezing his hand. He grins back and swings their joined hands a few times.

They both looked up at the chains holding his swing at an ominous creak and groan.

"Maybe we should get back before I bring this whole contraption done, huh Blondie?" he says, standing carefully and backing away from the swing. Sawyer wonders why she gets up so quickly after him until he looks down and sees their still linked hands.

He doesn't let go and neither does she.

* * *

kinda cute ending, right?

reviews are love!


	25. Y is for Yes

good things come in threes? three chapters at once? yes?

This can be read as a companion to **R is for Ring **but like most (if not all) of my chapters can be read standing alone.

enjoy -

**

* * *

Y is for Yes **

One year.

They'd been in the 'real world', that is, their proper time and place and alive, for one year.

They lived in a nice two story house just outside the city; house hunting had been surprisingly easy. All he wanted was a backyard and a barbecue.

"What are you thinking about?" warm, slender arms wrapped around his stomach from behind and he grinned into the sink.

"Nothin', just, it's been a whole year." he replied quietly. She squeezed him and kissed his shoulder before settling her chin there.

"Still happy?"

"Juliet, it's _stupid_ how happy I am." He said as he turned in her embrace and rested a hand on her cheek, thumb stroking the skin slowly. She mirrored his smile and bit her lip.

"What are you thinkin' about?" he countered. She looked up at him and he could see the start of a flush coming up her cheeks. "What?" he asked, curious now.

"Just thinking there's not enough time before people get here for you to show me how happy you are." she said softly, looking down to his mouth, toying with the shirt at his back gently.

"You, ma'am, are going to kill me one of these days with that mouth of yours, you know that?" he groaned out before pressing a loving kiss to her smiling lips.

As if on cue, the doorbell rang and James sighed as Juliet pulled back. "I'll get it," she whispered against his lips before sliding from his arms with a light laugh and heading for the front door.

James took a deep breath and turned back to the barbecue utensils he'd been washing in the sink before he'd gotten lost in thought.

From the kitchen he could hear Juliet greet someone, Jin and Sun if his hearing was still working, and smiled a little as he rinsed the tongs.

As soon as he and Juliet were sure they were staying put in this world, their world, indefinitely, they had looked up all the news from the past 3 years (for him) and 6 years (for her) that they could find.

First off, here there was no plane crash.

Second, they had money, passports, social security numbers, credentials and savings.

Third, they were not going to question why this was the way it was; instead, they were going to go with it and be happy.

Once this was established, they agreed a move was in order; they looked at a map and decided to throw a dart. It landed in Connecticut. They packed up their few belongings and bought a car (he was _not_ getting on another plane and she wasn't about to make him) for the drive.

They arrived in New Haven, Connecticut and bought the first house they agreed on, a modest two story. With a backyard and barbecue.

He joined the New Haven Police Department and did well, Juliet proud of him and his NHPD badge. She was quickly employed at the Yale-New Haven Hospital and also worked part time at Yale University in the research department, sometimes teaching the odd class of advanced research students.

Jin and Sun had found them before he and Juliet had even thought about trying to contact anyone from the island.

Here, James was James Ford and Juliet was Juliet Carlson. Jin had a difficult time remembering their actual last names and when he did, it took a while to track them down in New Haven. It had started as a mission to reconnect and ended up with Jin and Sun and their little girl Ji Yeon moving to Hartford, an hour away by car.

"Jim, do you need help with the barbecue?" Jin interrupted James' thoughts and he turned to face the other man with a grin.

"Sure, Jinbo, let's go get the grill all warmed up," with a clap on the back and warm smiles the men were lifting the tongs and spatulas and carrying them through the living room and out the back door to the fenced in yard.

"Oh, she's getting so big," Juliet said with a grin as Ji Yeon reached for her from Sun's arms.

"You have no idea; she told me 'no' and crossed her arms yesterday." Sun replied, handing her daughter off easily. The two women grew close over the last year, connecting instantly when they learned to trust each other.

Now they referred to her and James as 'uncle' and 'aunt'.

James looked up as Juliet came out into the yard talking with Sun, with Ji Yeon on her hip. He felt something tug at him and grinned when she met his eyes.

"Are you going to have a child soon, Jim?" James turned to look at Jin who was trying to light the gas. He still hadn't dropped the habit of calling him 'Jim' and now he just answered to it.

"A baby? Me? Can you say disaster," he brushed it off, but he hadn't been able to get the image of a little baby girl with stunning blue eyes and a dimpled smile out of his head since he saw Juliet with Ji Yeon for the first time a year ago.

"Hello!" A holler came from the front of the house. James rolled his eyes but a grin appeared anyway. Miles had found them next, had actually tracked down Jin and Sun to Hartford a month after they moved. The surprise came when he showed up a week later with a woman named Anna and a duffel bag.

He stayed too, but only for two weeks before moving to Middletown, halfway between James and Juliet, and Jin and Sun. Anna became a permanent fixture. None of them could figure out how he'd found such a wonderful woman so quick who could get over his obvious annoying tendencies.

"Back here Ghostbuster!" James hollered back and Miles came through the wood gate with Anna right behind him with a fruit platter.

"Miles, Anna," Juliet greeted them happily, a crushing hug for Miles just like every time they saw each other, and a gentler one for Anna. Jin and Miles shook hands and caught up and Anna went to coo over Ji Yeon who was chasing a ladybug.

"Need some help?" Juliet suddenly said from around his left shoulder. James blinked and wordlessly moved to the side. Juliet laughed and easily pumped the gas before sparking the fumes. The barbecue rushed to life and James shook his head.

"What would I do without you Blondie?" he dropped a kiss on her forehead.

"Let's hope you never find out," she replied, their scripted and comfortable rhythm.

"You guys hear from Dan? He and Char are 'stuck in traffic'." Miles called from inside the house where he was helping himself to a beer. He came out with three and handed one to Juliet and one to Jin.

Juliet popped the cap on hers and took a sip before handing the bottle to James who did the same.

"Oh, leave them alone Miles, they just got engaged. Let 'em enjoy the glow." Anna spoke up from the patio couch. The conversation flowed easily and steaks and burgers and hot dogs were grilled. Hours later, Daniel and Charlotte showed up, both grinning and blushing as they accepted hugs and food and drinks.

It was dark and Ji Yeon was asleep on her father's lap, Sun rubbing her back soothingly. Anna and Miles were talking with Daniel and Charlotte, cards being laid down and picked up and shuffled.

Juliet leaned against the patio door and watched her friends with a small smile. James came up behind her and slid strong hands over her hips and around her waist to meet over her bellybutton. He smiled against her neck when she sighed and leaned back into him.

"We did good, huh?" he mumbled softly. She nodded with a smile and murmured a 'yes' back.

"You ever think about makin' one of those?" he asked gently. Rachel and Julian were still a sore subject, even after having them show up and be over all the time, a spare room devoted to them. The tear filled reunion the sisters had experienced as soon as Juliet and James were settled in New Haven was still fresh in their minds, mostly because they figured this was an _afterlife_.

"Maybe," she replied just as gently. She knew about his doubts.

"You know, I never thought about kids, at least not until I heard about Clementine," That meeting was awkward and hard, for all parties involved, but he and Cassidy had agreed to monthly visits.

Cassidy and Clementine would spend a few weeks this coming summer with him and Juliet too.

"You're a great father," Juliet says immediately, squeezing his hands. He squeezed back and kissed her shoulder now.

"I never thought about having a kid," he repeated, "until I saw you with Ji Yeon that first time." he finished. He could see her frown a little and opened his mouth to clarify.

"I never thought about kids, just about how I'd screw 'em up, but now, here with you in our home with our friends and family? I want a kid with you. With blue eyes and dimple and blonde curls,"

Juliet chuckled. "I don't think you get to choose what they look like," she replied.

It wasn't a no, but it wasn't a yes either.

"So, what do you think?" he asked.

"I never thought about kids either," she said quietly back.

He stayed quiet until she spoke again.

"Not until you. Only you." she said, turning in his arms like he had earlier that day. "You're the only one,"

"You're my only one too," he said back, pressing a kiss to her nose lightly. She smiled.

"One and done?"

"One and done. I hope that means one person and done and not one kid and done, because once you say yes," he trailed off with a smirk. She laughed loudly and James enjoyed the sound thoroughly.

Miles and Jin looked up at the couple and then at each other, exchanging knowing glances.

They saw James reach into his pocket and grinned as he held her hand and led her inside.

They knew what was in their friend's pocket (they'd been with him to pick out the ring) and they knew Juliet would soon be out here with the beautiful band on her finger and tears in her eyes.

James had told them a while ago (years and years if you counted the 70's time warp) about his plans to propose. So it wasn't Christmas in Dharmaville and there weren't carols on the speakers and there was no string of twinkling lights and no mistletoe: they knew she'd still say yes.

* * *

Of COURSE she's going to say yes :D

Also, points to whoever can see the blatant Castle reference (that show i may just be obsessed with...)

one more!

reviews are love!


	26. Z is for Zeta

alright, we're at the end and this one is short too :(

thanks to all of you for your reviews and alerts and amazing support, this is definitely for all of you!

and so, for the last time from Alphabet Soup II,

enjoy -

**

* * *

Z is for Zeta (7)**

There were seven things that tipped Juliet off to the fact that James wanted to propose.

_One_, Amy had been looking at her and James, grinning wildly, for a week now. When Juliet asked her why, Amy would just shake her head and smile, 'I'm just happy is all,'.

_Two_, the floorboard in the bedroom no long squeaked. He probably hid the ring there so he wouldn't lose it and she wouldn't find it. She was tempted to look and see if she was right, but that would take all the fun out of it. Plus, James would probably find out she'd peeked.

_Three_, Miles and Jin had sly smirks on their face like they always did when they knew something she didn't. Granted, it wasn't very often they wore those faces, but when they did, she knew something was going on. Miles was worse though, because he would tease her about him knowing something big and exciting, while Jin just smiled and said everything was fine.

_Four_, James avoided talk of weddings and marriage like the plague. He wouldn't be obvious about, but while before they could talk to people in the compound who were getting married, even the word 'wedding' would make him change the subject. Juliet had a theory that James thought that if they didn't talk about it, it wouldn't cross their minds.

_Five_, when he held her hand, he would stroke her ring finger absently, gently. This one took her a couple of days to notice, but when she did, it sent a warm feeling through her.

_Six_, she would wake up with him watching her some mornings, with a soft smile on his face, a hand gently moving over her. Again, not completely unusual, but it was the look in his eyes that took her breath away.

The seventh thing was actually the first. They'd been sitting on the small porch out front, Juliet's feet in James' lap, reading their books in comfortable silence.

Every now and then, James would pass a hand over her foot or calf and she would smile behind her book. It was when he put his book down and gently tipped hers down so he could fully see her face that Juliet sat up and actually looked at him.

"I had an interesting comment from Pete today." he said carefully.

"What did he say?" Juliet asked curiously.

When are you going to put a ring on her finger, eh Jim?

"Nothin', just got me thinkin',"

"About what?"

"How I'm just gonna have to marry you one of these days,"

They smiled at each other and went back to their books, her feet resting in his lap and his hand smoothing over her skin.

* * *

To me, they're already married ;)

thank you so much, again, for the amazing continued support!

:)


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