text: Think of this film as fan service, a wet dream for the slasher genre admirer. We start off with a gory prologue which is pretty much unrelated to the rest of the film. Flash forward nine months and the real meat of the plot begins: The virginal Mandy Lane is coveted by every jock and nerd in her school, and gets invited to spend a weekend at a ranch by three guys who think they can get lucky, and two bimbos obsessed with their weight and boob size. So.. you have a bunch of young students in a house in the middle of nowhere on a dark night, who want to do nothing but have sex, do drugs and drink booze. The only other company is a hunky ranch-hand who may or may not be suffering from Gulf War Syndrome. Hmm... potential future suspect maybe?<br /><br />So as you're probably ascertained by now, all the house-guests end up being slaughtered in a variety of bloody ways, and for a change the black man ISN'T the first to die. There are some conventions that still hold up though, like the scantily clad babe being chased by a car in a field. Or the lights going out mysteriously in the evening as our 'heroes' unwisely separate to tackle the problem. Even down to the so-called shocking twist at the end, the movie is like an old 80's horror updated for the noughties, and on this score it succeeds.<br /><br />Unfortunately, it also inherits a lot of the problems of the films of that era too, namely the paper-thin characters and the predictability of the whole enterprise. People get cut up, shot, bludgeoned etc but because of their innate hatefulness to the audience and stupidity in getting themselves in these situations, it's hard to care as the bodies stack up. Someone gets murdered, one of their friends goes out to look for them alone, BANG they're brown bread. Rinse, then repeat. Maybe one day we'll get a screenplay with plausible, intelligent, likable characters who make rational decisions but still end up being outwitted by a genius killer. Until then, we have to tolerate teenagers with the I.Q of pond-life being picked off by a deranged hoodie. Oh well.. 4/10