Title: my account is only psuedo-anonymous so i won&#x27;t reveal too much about the situation but someone very important in my life just passed away. i&#x27;ve never been in this situation and i&#x27;m berating myself for not being broken. i&#x27;m with family and assuming the role of keeping everyone calm, but mostly because i am calm, not because i am someone they typically rely on. i am sad. i have cried. yet, i am not broken like them. i can&#x27;t tell if i&#x27;m feeling numb or if i am some sort of sociopath. is it normal to feel so still and empty in the midst of something so calamitous?<p>i feel ashamed. i don&#x27;t think this is absent grief. i loved this person with my entire being. i&#x27;m worried that there&#x27;s something wrong with me. is this my way of grieving? is my coping mechanism letting go of all sentiment and walking through the motions? i feel so out of place; they keep asking me if i&#x27;m okay; i&#x27;m thinking of putting on the act of being completely distraught so that everyone else will leave me alone. i&#x27;m so drained and i think it&#x27;s mostly this anxiety over my reaction. i&#x27;m hungry and exhausted and i really just want to know what to do?<p>are any of you who have experience in this department willing to give me some advice? i can&#x27;t talk to my family, most of them are in an incurable state. the wound is still very fresh.
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