Title:  Hey HN,<p>I&#x27;m on my 3rd consecutive job that I hate. I&#x27;m a manager, though I&#x27;ve remained very technical and actively coding. I&#x27;ve liked all the teams I hired, and always had really good feedback from them and well above average survey ratings. I want to feel happy about work again.<p>Despite spending more and more time carefully picking a job, it always feels like I&#x27;m either deceived, or missed some stuff I should have caught earlier.<p>I can&#x27;t get out of bed, am tired all the time. Sometimes on the brink of tears. I&#x27;m at a spot where it&#x27;s very obvious to me that I&#x27;m depressed, it&#x27;s impacting my family life. I&#x27;m losing my time, and should look elsewhere. But I&#x27;ve had 4 different jobs over the past 6y, and I&#x27;d love to settle somewhere. When stuff is f-ed up 3 times in a row, it&#x27;s time to look at yourself in the mirror ; either I have the wrong expectations, not enough patience, or I don&#x27;t know how to find a job that is right for me. I think it&#x27;s a combination of all three.<p>What really f-ed me up is a brief, recent period of feeling love towards my job when I had hope to change the scope towards something more useful, that reminded me how it can feel.<p>If you love the job you&#x27;re in, how did you find it? What are the concessions you made? What are the red flags (or the right signs) to tell you a job is the right one? Did you manage to reform a shitty job in something at least tenable?
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