Facts of experience are the phenomena that occur in our day to
day living. These are the experiences we observe for ourselves
and in others. As parents we witness our children’s ‘facts of
experience’and then make relative assessments about how they are
doing with the challenges in their lives. These facts of
experience are the behaviors we can see. On the other hand, the
feelings, attitudes, motivations and other internal processes
our childen privately experience are not necessarily congruent
or apparent with what we witness. This becomes the parental
dilemma in trying to best understand our children. • Trust what
you observe regardless of what is said. • Acknowledge what you
feel in relationship to what your child is experiencing. • Talk
about what you sense is going on in order to get clarification
of your own values. • Keep a rational perspective.