It takes more than communication to form and maintain communion
among persons. The bonds of communion are determined and
developed by promises and their fulfillment, while the
boundaries of various communities are marked by appropriate
confidentiality. Promises and secrets are important instruments
which love uses to form and articulate interpersonal communion
in a multiplicity of communities. A promise is a deliberate and
free expression both of an intention to fulfill another’s hope
and of the acceptance of the added responsibility which follows
from expressing an intention to do so.41 Promises can be
unilateral, but many promises, such as those involved in most
legal contracts, are bilateral or even multilateral. Promises
enable two or more persons to will together over some stretch of
time; such union of wills is necessary for dependable
cooperation, which, in turn, is necessary for effective
community of every sort. Love requires Christians to build up
community, and so it requires them to make and keep