June 1977 | Volume 28, Issue 4 Historians are still puzzling
over the discovery of an official White House portrait of
President Roger Darcy Amboy, who appears to have held our
nation’s highest office somewhere between Van Buren and
Buchanan. Obscured by drapes for over a century, the painting
was discovered by an Amboy descendant who had come to urethane
the baseboards. “I am frankly embarrassed,” confessed
presidential historian T. Fawning Strathalmond. “He was there
all along. We just naturally assumed he was Polk.” Little is
known as yet about our mystery President. Though there is not a
shred of evidence to support it, Roger Darcy Amboy was probably
born in the late 1700s in or around Succassuna, New Jersey. The
earliest documentation, carbon-dated to about November, 1803,
shows an Amboy in Bayonne receiving “seven decapods of barm
fortnightly” from the Huckabuck party bigwig, Boss Nib, who
would later moneybag Amboy’s possible rise to power. A champion
of the bronze standard, Boss Nib broke with the Huc