Link back to index.html The Death and Dying Process Death and
Dying As caregivers, one either becomes a better person through
compassion, patience, and humor, or they become embittered and
angry. Wendy Lustbader is an author who has written a moving
book entitled " Counting on Kindness: The Dilemmas of
Dependency."1991. The Free Press, New York, New York. In the
book she describes the importance of receiving gratitude when we
help others; because giving help without recognition can
embitter us as individuals. We need to be kind, in order to
count on kindness as we age. The person who has dementia cannot
always provide gratitude for their caregiver. Gratitude must be
looked for in gentle ways and unassuming ways. Perhaps it is a
smile, or a gesture, or an expression of love such as placing
the head on the caregiver's shoulder. If gratitude is not felt
even on an occasional basis, it is difficult to cope with death
and dying. Death and dying as Dr. Kubler-Ross indicates, is the
"final stage of growth". Death an