“A Report to an Academy” (“Ein Bericht für eine Akademie”) is a
short story by Franz Kafka, written and published in 1917. In
the story, an ape named Red Peter, who has learned to behave
like a human, presents to an academy the story of how he
effected his transformation. The story was first published by
Martin Buber in a German monthly. This English version was
translated from German by Philip Boehm. Esteemed Gentlemen of
the Academy! I feel honored by your invitation to present the
academy with a report on my former life as an ape. I am afraid,
however, that I will be unable to comply with your request. It
is now some five years that I have been separated from apedom –
a short time according to the calendar, perhaps, but an eternity
when you have to gallop through it the way I did. And even
though I was accompanied, at least for parts of the way, by fine
human beings, good counsel, orchestral music and applause, my
journey was in essence a solitary one, for the accompaniment-to
stick with the metaphor-kept