The following paragraphs represent weak and strong examples of
focus. You can implement them by having your students read them
and asking them which they like better and why. Weak Example:
When I first brought my cat home from the humane society she was
a mangy, pitiful animal. It cost a lot to adopt her: forty
dollars. And then I had to buy litter, a litterbox, food, and
dishes for her to eat out of. Two days after she came home with
me she got taken to the pound by the animal warden. There's a
leash law for cats in Fort Collins. If they're not in your yard
they have to be on a leash. Anyway, my cat is my best friend.
I'm glad I got her. She sleeps under the covers with me when
it's cold. Sometimes she meows a lot in the middle of the night
and wakes me up, though. Strong Example:When I first brought my
cat home from the Humane Society she was a mangy, pitiful
animal. She was so thin that you could count her vertebrae just
by looking at her. Apparently she was declawed by her previous
owners, then abandoned