All children tantrum. Some children are better at it than
others. Some are very dramatic throwing every ounce of energy
they have into the tantrum. Some are excellent at finding the
most inconvenient time or most embarrassing place to let lose.
Many children are excellent at drawing their parents into the
drama, making them feel responsible for the upset and uncertain
about how to respond. All parents respond to tantrumming. Some
responses are more useful than others. Some responses tend to
reinforce the tantrums, keeping them going longer than necessary
and setting the stage for the next one. Other responses are
neutral. The best responses help the child understand and learn
to manage emotional upset. They may not stop the tantrum in the
moment but can they help lead the child toward calmer solutions
in the future. Before I go any farther, I want to state that you
cannot judge a parent by a child’s tantrums. Some children are
more tightly wound than others; some family situations are more
difficult to manage