Question: I recently heard you speak in San Diego and need some
clarification. While I understand that researchers have found
that high self-esteem is not what it was cracked up to be, I
want my kids to approach the challenges of life with confidence
in their abilities. There’s got to be a reconciliation point
here. What is it? Answer: Excellent question! First, researchers
have indeed found that high self-esteem doesn’t live up to its
hype. In fact, it’s not a desirable characteristic at all. The
general finding has been that people with high regard for
themselves have equally low regard for others. Yes, they feel
really good about themselves (the sales pitch), but they tend to
be seriously lacking in sensitivity to anyone else. The
desirable attribute is humility. That was known thousands of
years ago, proving once again that there is nothing new under
the sun. Humble people pay attention to others, look for
opportunities to serve, and are modest when it comes to their
accomplishments. People with high self