text: I fell asleep without trying to. I was exhausted, but not tired. I was in my car. My friend, the stranger, in the passenger seat. We were good friends, both headed to the beach. I’ve never been to the beach, and I wished to know her better. There was a lot of people there. Mostly people I’ve met at least once. Some people were in the water in pairs, happy. Some stayed on the beach, comfortably separated. They all looked well. I took toward the water, ready to wade in its deep blue. Determination drove me as I weaved through the crowd. Close to the water I lost my friend, the stranger. I think she was beautiful. I caught a glimpse of her; she noted me. She came to me and grabbed my hand with both of hers. Her smile calmed me amidst the anxiety of the large crowd. She walked into the water ahead of me and I tried to follow. Another pair crosses our path between us and I lose sight of her for just a second. In that moment, she disappeared. I entered the water alone, ignored by the pairs of people already there. She was here somewhere, and I couldn’t abandon my friend. I searched in boredom, and was all too patient. Minutes passed by and the others started to notice me. I could tell by how they seemed so sad when they looked at me. The minutes turned to hours, then days. As I passed people by, still looking for her, they told me to abandon my search. They can’t tell me why, and they say nothing more. The melancholy looks from the people passed in my search, the advice I never heard yet could recite, and the loss of my friend, the stranger, who wanted to show me the ocean; all this overwhelmed me. I returned to shore, feet wet from the water. The sand was warm, and the people in the water stopped frowning toward me. I relinquished my guilt to a small cabin on the beach I had spotted. A tall old wooden fence almost blocked it from view from the water. The cabin was odd, no windows or doors. Lattice all along the bottom, it was almost impossible to see under the cabin. I sit on the blind side of the fence with the cabin. There’s a fire pit with no firewood or ash. This pit could keep me company, at least until my friend, the stranger, returns. *^There’s ^something ^under ^the ^cabin.* By the fire pit there was a collection of colored pencils. Nearly all had their head buried in the sand so that they stood straight up, as if someone had wanted their heads underground. Perhaps so the pencils couldn’t see that their color was taken from them, that they all were grey-white with clear lead. Moments passed. Thoughts of my friend, the stranger, crossed my mind. *^Something ^wants ^out ^from ^under ^the ^cabin.* I grab a few of the pencils that couldn’t stay under the sand. I align them with the rest so that they all were the same. All of their heads in the sand, blissfully unaware that they aren't what they assumed. It could only ever feel right, nothing more. *^She's ^coming ^out ^from ^under ^the ^cabin.* I’ve finally noticed. Black hair. Blue-grey skin. Her eyes were black holes and her teeth dripped with tar. She wore a familiar dress. *^This ^is ^who ^took ^the ^color ^from ^these ^pencils.* She looked like she’s been here all along. Why would she wait below this strange cabin? Or choose me? *^You ^wanted ^to ^be ^here.* She’s tearing the lattice, inciting dread within me. I grab the pencils from their place by the fire pit. In panic, I throw the white-washed pencils at the stranger. *^I ^never ^wanted ^to ^be ^here, ^not ^like ^this.* She doesn’t seem to notice the pencils. *^But ^how ^could ^she? ^She ^took ^their ^color ^from ^them!* The fire pit was filled with sand in my panic. I struggled, but I couldn’t get far. I could feel her cold breath. It felt like ice water pouring onto my skin. Goosebumps never came, I was content in my fear. *^I ^hate ^this.* Maybe if I had used the pencils as kindle for a fire, I could have warmed her heart. But I destroyed the pit and threw away the pencils in my panic and fear and now my damned hands won’t stop shaking. Everything in me screamed to stay still. She said “Don’t go anywhere.” Tar-dripping smile, cold breath getting heavy. A light faintly shines in the back of her throat as she splits her jaw. Her mouth now open, unhinged and wide like a snake, spews forth a dull light that engulfs me entirely. It feels more than cold. I feel a deep feeling, not unlike the pain of loss, wrap around my mind as my consciousness fades to a singular thought before falling asleep. *^Oh, ^how ^sorry ^I ^am ^to ^have ^lost ^my ^friend, ^the ^stranger.