text: Not so long ago there lived a president who loved to build things. He loved it so much that he spent all of his money (and often the money of others) on building things and putting his name on them. Apart from this, his biggest interests were in going on television or hearing himself talked about in the news. He had a different building for every occasion and a different answer for every reporter. Many loved him. Many did not. One day, two business men came to see the president. They claimed to be patriots, suggesting that they knew how to make the finest walls imaginable. “We weave them out of a special material which only we have the technology for.” Not only were their walls extraordinarily “large” and “strong”, but they were impressive in that they were “practically invisible” to those without a keen eye or intellect, yet “impossible to miss” for those who understood the “art of the wall.” The president was impressed. What a HUGE opportunity this presented! “With a wall such as this” he thought, “I could truly tell which of my advisors are worthy of their positions, and which are lame.” “Also, I could use such a thing to keep people who look different than me out of the country.” So, he immediately promised the two patriots a great sum of money to build a wall for him. “No need,” said the two “we will simply make the Southern Kingdom pay for it.” “Even better!” thought the president. The business men brought in their contractors and set up cranes and big trucks with coils of “high tech nanocarbon” (which were really just empty spools) to create their incredible wall. The contractors slowly wove their way through the air across miles of border, using great care to create the most convincing pantomime. Many miles away in his palace, the president found himself pondering. "I wonder how they are coming with my wall!" He became uncertain when he remembered that only those of keen eye or intellect would be able to see the wall. Certainly, the president, with his brilliant mind and vision, had no cause for concern with such a matter. However, he decided to send one of his “best people” to see how the project was progressing. "I'll dispense my most trusted lawyer to the border," thought the president. “He's very smart and has been of great help with many of my building projects. He also understands the importance of keeping out people who are different from me.” So the trusted lawyer went to the construction site where the two patriots sat supervising their crew as they pretended to knit across the skyline. "Crap!" thought the attorney, staring blankly at the open space before him. "I don’t see it!" But he kept this thought to himself. The business men encouraged him to look closely at their creation. “Isn’t it a thing of beauty?” they asked while struggling to maintain expressions of seriousness. “Won’t the president be pleased?” The two went on discussing the quality of their material and the unparalleled craftmanship of their work. The stymied lawyer stared and nodded in response. Try as he might, he simply could not see the wall (which wasn’t really there in the first place.) "Double crap!" he thought. "Could it be that I am lacking in vision and intellect? Am I unfit for my position? It would not do for the president to think so! I must keep this to myself in order to protect my position!” "Is everything okay?” asked one of the businessmen. “You haven’t been saying much.” "Oh...right.” Said the president’s trusted counsel. “I was just...overwhelmed with the brilliance of it all. What a wonderful thing you have created!” he continued. “I’ll be sure to let the president know what an incredible and patriotic service you have been providing.” "Great!" said the two tricksters, and they discussed the many “technicalities” involved in bringing such a marvel to fruition. The lawyer paid close attention so that he might be able to convey the many wonders of the wall when he shared his report with the president. “One last thing” said the pair. “It seems our neighbors to the South are having some difficulty with cashflow. We all know what an unreliable lot they are.” The lawyer nodded in agreement with the last statement. “Unfortunately,” the devious duo continued, “we will not be able to complete construction without immediate funding. What a shame it would be for the president to be denied the glory of such a magnificent achievement!” To the president’s delight, his attorney returned to the palace and gushed about the “amazing” sights he had encountered. “We must make sure this important work continues” cried the president while fantasizing of the fanfare he was sure to receive. “We shall have the people pay for it. After all, it is for their own benefit.” Over time, the president sent other officials to check in on the project and test the aptitude of those in his cabinet. Each of them became unnerved to discover that they were unable to see anything at all. Fearful for their careers, each shared ecstatic reviews with the president in effort to avoid being exposed as inept. Soon the palace twittered with excitement for the massive erection occurring in the South. Then the entire land followed suit. The president, feeling empowered, took to the media boasting incessantly about his wall and extolling its (and his) incredible virtues. In truth, nobody was able to see the wall (because there wasn’t one.) However, many commoners who were loyal to the president started claiming that they could see it. So strong was this phenomenon that some even convinced themselves that they actually could see a wall. Amongst this population, any view to the contrary was considered treasonous. Citizens voicing concern over this mass delusion were chastised with labels like “fake” and deemed as unpatriotic. At long last, the businessmen announced the completion of their project. A grand celebration was planned. “You won’t believe your eyes!” Stated an excited president who was eager to further capitalize on his wall. On the morning of the celebration, the president arrived at the planned sight. He had been looking forward to this day for what seemed to be an eternity. “Take me to the wall!” the head of state demanded. “We are at the wall, sir” his driver replied, catching his employer by surprise. “Of course,” said the magnate. “The sun was in my eyes.” A sense of horror washed over the president as he realized that he could not see a wall. “Could it be that I am somehow lacking? What would happen to my reelection if this were to be known? How could I recover the image I’ve worked so hard to create?” he queried. Nothing scared the man more than looking like a fool. A conclusion was quickly reached. “Nobody can find out about this!” As the day progressed the president was able to return to form. He took opportunities to demonize those with differing perspectives or complexions. He gloated excessively. He happily accepted praise from supporters who had come to revel in their shared victory over sensibility. When the time came to address the crowd (and the nation) the president proudly took stage in front of an empty background which extended for miles. “Isn’t it beautiful?” he said to rounds of applause. From the crowd a voice called out. “Look out! The wall is falling!!” The president hid in terror from the imaginary fallout. The world, seeing the moment for what it was, laughed. And so it came to pass that the president, heavy with pomposity and light in reason, was crushed by the weight of a wall that never existed.