text: My daddy was a lucky man. I know this because I saved special things to give him luck. Sometimes I found pretty stones or a penny when we went for a walk. Once I found a four-leaf clover. I always went to old Mrs. Pike’s house next door after school because Mom worked until late. She showed me how to press the leaf between the pages of a book until it was dry and pretty. We glued it onto a card which I decorated with glitter and magic marker for Daddy. I showed it proudly to Mom when she came to get me, still wearing her waitress top, her face pale and drawn with fatigue. “Very nice, baby,” she said. “Now, if we only knew where he was, we could mail it to him.” Crestfallen, I put the card down. Mrs. Pike quickly interceded. “Keep it in a safe place, Kerry, and you can give it to him next time he comes,” she said. "I'm sure he'll show up soon." “But he’s always so busy doing important work,” I said. “He told me so. He has to travel a lot. That’s why he sends the postcards.” I had a treasured collection of postcards which he'd sent me, carefully glued into an album, from New York, Los Angeles, Arizona, even one from Paris, the real Paris in France. Mrs. Pike and I had had fun looking up where that was. My mother wearily pushed her hair back from her face. “It would be nice if he was as quick to send the support checks,” she said dryly, then bit off whatever else she was about to say as Mrs. Pike gave a warning cough. “You’re exhausted, Leila. Sit down and have a quick cup of tea before you go home.” Mom plopped down in a chair and rested her head in her hands. “You’re a gem, Mrs. P,” she said gratefully as Mrs. Pike returned with the tea and some cookies. “I’m sorry I was late paying you last week. I got a puncture and had to buy a new tire. Always something.” “Don’t worry about it,” said Mrs. Pike. “Ms. Kerry here has been a big help. We did laundry together and she washed all the windows she could reach. Now, Kerry, don’t be like a squirrel and forget where you put the card before your daddy next visits.” I giggled. Daddy did have a way of disappearing for long periods and then showing up when least expected. Sure enough, the next week he arrived unannounced and pressed a large bundle of crisp notes into Mom’s hand as she opened the door. She grabbed it as if expecting him to change his mind, eyeing him suspiciously. “Where’d you get this? Dogs? Horses?” I wondered how you could get money from dogs and horses. That didn't make sense. One of those weird adult things. Daddy gave a wry grin as he escorted me out. “Ask me no questions and I’ll tell you no lies,” he said. “I think luck rubbed off on me from that shiny white pebble that Kerry gave me last time. That’s all you need to know. I’ll have her back by six.” Both Mom and I gaped as we saw the shiny red convertible sitting in the driveway. “Mom, look,” I said, almost too excited to speak. “That is the most amazing car I have ever seen!” Mom shook her head. “I don’t want to know what you’ve been doing to get that, or who you’ve been working with. Just make sure she wears her seatbelt and mind the speed limit.” “Yes, ma’am,” said Daddy, opening the door for me. “I will drive like the safest little old lady you have ever seen.” It was a lovely spring day, so Daddy put the top down. I laughed with glee as my hair whipped in the wind. “What do you want to do today, princess?” he said. I never hesitated when he asked me this. There was a park in town with a renovated antique carousel. I loved riding on the gaudy, prancing horses. “The carousel, and then the row boats and then pizza for lunch and ice cream after. Mom doesn’t let me have it ‘cos it’s not healthy and...” “Whoa, steady on,” he said, laughing. “Your wish is my command, but one thing at a time.” Suddenly something occurred to me. “Daddy, can we go home quick? I forgot your card with the lucky four-leaf clover that I made for you.” “We don’t have time, sweetheart. Give it to me when I take you home.” We had a wonderful day. Daddy’s car drew admiring glances wherever we went. I felt very important when we went for lunch in an Italian restaurant and the owner greeted Daddy like an old friend. I was allowed to sit at the bar next to him. The bartender asked Daddy what he wanted. “I’ve got special cargo today, so no drinking and driving for me,” he said. “Make it two Cokes.” The bartender nodded approvingly and gravely put a little umbrella and a cherry in mine, which made me laugh. It was so sweet it made my teeth hurt, but I was determined to finish it because Mom would never let me have soda. I sipped on it so slowly that the ice melted. Replete with pizza and ice cream, I sighed happily. On the way home, though, my stomach began to swirl and lurch. I pressed my lips together and tried to take deep breaths through my nose. I could not, would not throw up in Daddy’s new car. When he parked at the house, I shot out of the car, raced past Mom who had come out to meet us and made it to the bathroom just in time. When she entered, I was washing my face with cold water. “He overloaded you with junk food as usual, I see,” she said with a sigh, gathering me to her for a hug. Feeling slightly better, I hugged her back, then remembered. “I have to find the card I made for him,” I said. “I need to give it to him. It’s his lucky four-leaf clover.” “He’s gone, baby. He said to tell you he's sorry, but he couldn't wait,” she said. “He had to talk to a man about some business.” I felt tears welling. “But I didn’t give him anything,” I said, frantic. “I know where I put the card. Now he won’t have good luck.” “Your father’s always made his own luck, or so he thinks,” she said. “It’s nice of you to give him lucky charms, but his luck will depend on the choices he makes." I must have looked puzzled because she squeezed my hand reassuringly. "Don't fret. When you’re older, I’ll explain it better. But so far he’s landed on his feet every time. Just like a cat.” A week later, Mom and I were awoken by a loud knocking at the door in the middle of the night. I heard Mom scrambling around to get dressed and peered through the stair rail as she opened the front door. I could just make out two police officers in the weak light of the porch. “Mrs. Donovan? May we come in? I am afraid we have some bad news.” It was a nightmare after that, with fragments of words floating up to me. “...car accident...possible sabotage, no, not a chance, dead at the scene...any recent disputes...criminal associates...” I pressed my head against the railing, tasting the salt of the tears trickling down my face. I knew it. Daddy never got his four-leaf clover and he hadn't landed like a cat after all.