text: “Are you sure,doctor?” “Yes... your son has ADHD,” A woman sat in a white room with her son sitting beside her and the doctor in front of her behind his desk, telling her what can be done to help her son's disability. “Doctor, is there any alternative to the medication? I just don’t think we can afford it,” the mother said in her worried voice, which was becoming her normal voice. “There are different methods of treating ADHD like physical activities, I’ll have Regina at the front desk print out a list of methods,” the doctor said sympathetically. “Thank you, doctor” the mother stood up, grabbed her son’s hand and walked out of the office. Calvin was an eight year old boy who was going into the third grade. He used to love school, but after kindergarten, people found out he had autism and was a natural born. The kids who remained his friends were told by their parents not to be around Calvin. Soon, Calvin was alone. Calvin climbed into his mother’s old car, that’s practically falling apart. It wasn’t actually his mothers, it was his grandfathers, his mother had to sell her car to be able to get groceries. Calvin had pale skin, like his skin had never been introduced to sunlight before. He was skinny, boney, he almost seemed malnourished. He was very tall for his age, taller than everyone else in his grade. His mother looked very similar to him, pale, skinny, tall, she had lines on her face and a few grey hairs which is shocking for her age. They got home, Calvin and his mother lived with his grandfather in his house that was older than Calvin himself. The house was small and seemed to lack furniture, it was clean but old stains made it look in a permanent state of filth which prevented Calvin’s mother from ever wanting guests. Calvin’s grandpa was watching the news. “Today, a law was passed in 37 states that allows parents to sterilize their children when they reach sexual maturity in order to prevent teen pregnancies,” said the news anchor in her loud, yet calm voice. “Christ, I remember when having a child was one of the most important moments in anyone’s life, watching your child being born, being the first to hold them, now these test tube babies want to prevent everyone from having their own children,” said Calvin’s grandpa is his raspy voice. “It’s still their own child if it’s a synthetic child dad,” Calvin’s mother replied. “Nah, it can’t be the same, a test tube can’t replace the feeling of seeing yer baby being born, ya can’t have the same connection with something from a test tube,” Calvin’s grandpa was flustered, he usually got this way when talking about this topic. “There’s no way I’d be this close with ya if ya were a test tube baby, sweetheart,” he said as he grabbed Calvin’s mother’s hand. Calvin’s mom said nothing, she only looked off into nothingness, as if she could see beyond the walls. She left her father's hand behind as she went into the cabinets to get Calvin some food. Calvin’s mother was interrupted by a knock at the front door. Calvin’s mother stopped what she was doing and walked toward the door. The knock was persistent and loud, it scared Calvin. Calvin’s mother looked through the peephole of the door, her eyes widened in shock, she almost seemed fearful. “Who is it, sweetheart,” Calvin’s grandpa asked, concerned from his chair. “Calvin, go to your room,” Calvin’s mother ordered her son in a shaky voice. Calvin looked at her blankly. “Now, Calvin.” Calvin complied and went through the hallway and into his room. One wouldn’t imagine Calvin’s room to be that of a child’s at first glance. His room was empty except for a small bed and a desk that had a few drawings on it, all of them left unfinished. Calvin could hear the front door being open and someone stepping inside and he could hear the discussion starting through the thin walls. “Jacob?” Calvin heard his mom ask in a shaky voice as if she were about to cry. “Hi, Emily,” Calvin heard a deep voice that he didn’t recognize say in response. “You... You are not welcome here!” Calvin heard his grandpa shout. He had never heard his grandpa shout before. “Dad, please go to your room. I can handle this on my own,” Calvin’s mother told his grandpa. Calvin could hear his grandpa rise from his chair, muttering profanity under his breath. Instead of following his daughter’s command, he instead went to Calvin’s room. He entered to find him sitting at his desk, looking down on his half finished art. “How ya doing, son?” Calvin’s grandpa asked with genuine concern. Calvin just shrugged his shoulders, not looking away from his desk. “Who is that man?” Calvin asked in a whisper so quiet, most would think it was the wind. But not his grandpa, most would describe him as the best damn listener they’ve had the pleasure of talking to, and he was quite proud of that. “That man is Jacob, he’s yer father, son.” Calvin’s mind raced, hopping from one thought to the next, never stopping for even half a second. His face didn’t show this though, it rarely showed emotion at all. Calvin didn’t like his face and how emotionless it was, just another part of him to be made fun of. “I thought he died when I was in ma’s belly.” Calvin responded, somehow even quieter. Yet his grandpa listened still. “Yeah, I’m sorry, both me and yer ma. We didn’t want to lie to ya, it was just easier that way.” He sighed loudly as he sat down onto Calvin’s bed. “He was a lyin’ coward who abandoned ya and yer ma. Left ya guys with nothing to turn to but me and this damn shack.” Calvin’s thoughts kept going and going and going, with no sign of stopping. He felt angry, sad, confused, hurt, all at the same time, and yet his face still remained without expression. Why did he leave? Why did they lie? His grandpa had tried to explain, but Calvin was even more confused. Why is he back? The volume of Calvin’s parents talking in the living room increased ever so slightly. Calvin tried to listen, but he wasn’t as good as his grandpa. Their volume kept increasing. “Things seem to be heatin’ up out there... maybe I ought-” He was interrupted by the sudden explosion of yelling coming from the living room. Calvin jumped, his eyes widened. Calvin’s grandpa shot up, an angry scowl on his face. He stormed swiftly to the door, Calvin had never seen him move so fast. He swung the door open, and looked back at Calvin, a concerned look replaced his exasperated expression. His eyes met Calvin’s, the first time he had ever since he was born. “Ya stay here, ya hear me?” Calvin said nothing, just looked back at his drawings. Calvin’s grandpa closed the door behind him. Calvin could hear his grandpa’s voice join the screaming competition. “Who the hell do ya think yer talking to like that, ya prick!” Calvin’s grandpa’s voice easily overpowered Calvin’s parents, he could hear the yelling so easily, as if he were in the same room. “Dad! I told you to stay out of this!” “I ain’t gonna sit back there and let this test tube baby speak to ya like that!” “Look, I am just trying to help, I know you guys need it!” It was the first time Calvin really focused on his father’s voice. It was unlike any voice he had heard before. It was deep, aggressive, commanding. The way he spoke, it seemed like he demanded attention, and he definitely had Calvin’s. “You know it wasn’t hard to find you guys, I might’ve asked five people at most!” Calvin got up from his desk, abandoning his drawings for another time. He walked in front of his door, staring at the white paint peeling off of it. “I just asked if they knew any people with a natural born son, and they all made the same face!” “Yeah and what face was that?” Calvin’s mother sounded as if she were on the verge of tears. “Their smile disappears, pity fills their eyes. They tell me the same sob story I bet you told them.” “Who exactly did ya ask, huh?” “Dad, stop!” “A gas station clerk, a cashier at a McDonalds. They told me how you begged for a job, how you had to quit your old one because they didn’t offer maternity leave anymore. How your boy is troubled!” “No! You do not get to talk about him like that, I’m the one who raised him!” “Raised him? In this shithole? No! He deserves better!” “You don’t think I know that? He is so special, so talented, his drawings are so amazing and he doesn’t even know it!” “I’ve turned my life around, I’m not the same man from all those years ago. I can get him out of here, both of you out of here, just say yes, please!” “Just more lies! Don’t believe him sweetheart, don’t!” “Why did you come back Jacob, why are you doing this to us?” Calvin’s mother could no longer hold back her tears. “I had to make things right, I know what I did was wrong, but I wasn’t ready, I needed to get my life straight.” Calvin noticed his father’s voice begin to fault, he wasn’t used to yelling this much. “What about her, huh? You think she had her life straight? She did, but ya popped into her life and destroyed everything!” Calvin’s mother just continued to cry. “Look I’m sorry, I was barely out of my parents' place, I was scared!” “You don’t think I was too?” “Well I’m here now! I can help now, just please let me.” “We don’t need yer help-” “Like hell you don’t old man!” “Don’t you dare talk to my dad like that!” “Look, you can’t keep living like this!” “Calvin is more than I will ever need!” “That is such bullshit and you know it!” Calvin could hear disgust in his father’s voice. “That boy has taken everything from you!” “Fuck you!” It was the first time Calvin had ever heard his mother curse. “You could’ve been so much more, built an actual career, that’s what you were actually doing! Then this kid came, don’t blame me for leaving, blame yourself for keeping him!” “Shut yer mouth, of course she kept him, she’s no murderer!” “Yeah, old man? She was definitely considering it. What? You didn’t tell him about our talks about the abortion?” “What’s he talking about, sweetheart?” Calvin’s mother stayed quiet, apart from some sniffling. “Yeah we had it all planned out didn’t we? Neither of us wanted that shit on us so we were just gonna get rid of him, would’ve made both our lives so much easier.” It became quiet. Calvin could hear his own heartbeat. “Tell me it’s not true, sweetheart.” “I love my boy, more than anything in this world.” Her voice was shaky, yet clear. “Keep telling yourself that. You resent that kid, he destroyed you.” Calvin understood. “I love my boy!” The screaming match resumed. Calvin opened the door, none of them noticed over the yelling. Calvin’s mind was clear as he entered his grandpa’s room across the hall. He turned the light on and looked around, the arguing continued right outside. Calvin looked under the bed and found what he was searching for. He picked it up and went back to his room. He sat at his desk, staring at his art, still unfinished. He remembered what his mom had said, “He’s so talented,” a tear rolled down his face, “I love my boy,” he smiled to himself. The yelling was quickly stopped by a sharp, loud bang that came and went in an instant. The room was quiet, more quiet than it has ever been, or ever will be.