text: It has been two weeks ever since i found out about the whispers, And it has been one year and a half ever since my love left this life. I didn’t even get to say goodbye, my love died and left me all alone. It felt as if my heart was crushed into a million pieces. After that i was just a walking body, no soul, no human-like. It’s like half my soul just vanished. I had no desire to do anything, until i heard these whispers calling for me. It was his voice, calling my name. It was a friday night and i was in my bedroom reading a book that i know I’ll never finish. It was so quiet i could hear my own heartbeat, I didn’t think there was any heartbeat left after my true love died. While i was reading i heard something outside my window, i left my book on my bed and went to check what it was. I opened the window and it turns out it was just the sound of the winds, as i had thought. I left the window open because it was summer and the weather was burning hot. I went back to continue on my reading and i could still hear this strange sound. Kind of like bees buzzing, a swarm of them. I went back again and shut the window. I stood frozen in the middle of the room, shocked by this continuing sound. I listened carefully, the sound was getting louder and louder. I thought i was losing my mind, I decided to go back to bed, maybe i have a headache and I’m hallucinating. Maybe the heat of the summer made me ill. I grabbed my book and accidentally shut it and I forgot what page i was it, and the sound is getting even louder. I grabbed my pillow and pushed it on my ears, hoping this sound would stop. The sound was getting louder than before, much more it’s causing my ears to hurt. I grabbed my pillow and threw it in the middle of the room and shouted: “STOP” And this time I definitely thought i had lost my mind. The pillow was frozen mid-air. It’s like a ghost was holding it and it was floating but not even moving. Completely frozen. I didn’t know what to do, i just got up and swiped my hand above and below it, what kind of sorcery is this? I thought so much about this, I grabbed the pillow and said “m-move” and the pillow fell into the ground and i was so shocked. At that moment I wanted to test if what i did was true, I went to the kitchen and returned with a glass of water. I threw it in the same spot and said “Stop” The water came out of the glass and it was as if someone had threw it in a really really frozen weather, but we are in summer. My mind was blown away. Has my longing for my love really drive me this crazy? I’ve always heard about people losing their minds and going crazy but i had never even thought of this happening to me, no I’m not crazy. Maybe I really do have hallucinations, I decided it was time to sleep, but how can one sleep after going through this thing. I don’t even know what it was, do i stop things from moving? Do i control things? Am I stopping time? I go to bed without even changing my clothes. And i try to sleep, insomnia is killing me tonight. After hours and hours of moving around and tossing and turning, i had finally fell asleep. I didn’t even notice i had school next morning, when my alarm waked me up at 6 AM. I remembered i had school, i got up and I forgot what had happened yesterday, i guess I thought it was a dream. I took a shower and dressed up, done my hair and grabbed my bag and went downstairs. I quickly grabbed an apple and headed to the door. I always leave much early, even before school starts. That is because when Joe and I were together, our first date was walking around the bridge which is half an hour away from home but was close to school. In that bridge he had made me a promise that he will never leave me, we met there almost every single day. There was no one but me on that bridge, everytime i go there my tears just keep falling. I stand there like a statue, like I’m frozen. And call out his name: “Joe, why did you leave me? You promised me...” This time was different, this time i heard someone calling me, i turned around but there was no one there. I suddenly remembered last night, it wasn’t a dream and I definitely wasn’t hallucinating. I focused again and the sound sounded more clearer here. It was joe’s voice calling me:”Emma, what are you doing over there? Come down” His voice said softly with a laugh. I remember this, it was when we went hiking once and I climbed a tree to get a better view of the place. But what is this? Why am I hearing this? I couldn’t help it and just used my hands and put them on my ears and yelled. I said stop again, and this time I wasn’t meaning for anything to stop, I didn’t mean for the water to stop moving or the trees to stay still. Or the birds to freeze while flying. I said with a crying voice:”Why is this happening to me? JOE!!!” i saw a spark behind me and turned instantly, it was like a portal. Like the ones i has seen in movies, “this can’t be real” I thought to myself. I came closer and I could hear his voice again in a distance. “I promise you, I’ll never let you go” I could hear joe talking. “What if you do let me go? Find yourself another girl?” I said I came closer and closer to the portal, I raised my hand and slowly touched it. I found myself at the bridge again, but this time i could see Joe and myself. Talking and laughing. I miss this so much, i miss him. I started walking towards us, i can hear him again. I can see him again, my love. I smiled and tears kept on rolling down my face. I thought to myself that this is the only way i could keep on seeing him. I could sit hear for hours and hours and just watch him talk and laugh and be the guy that i loved like no other. When this memory finished and we both went home, the portal showed up again. I walked to it and found myself at the bridge but at present time. What i was shocked about more than walking into a portal is that i was standing in the middle of the road with cars honking and going so fast. I quickly jumped to the side and realized that it was night!!! And the road was filled with cars that could have killed me. I opened my bag and picked up my phone and found 11 missed phone calls and like a billion messages. I quickly ran home, that would have took me half an hour but it only took me 15 minutes because i was worried about what my parents would say. When I started to see my house from a distance I could also see red and blue lights. THEY CALLED THE COPS!!! I instantly went to the door and opened it and my mom and dad and two police officers came up to see me. “Where the hell were you Emma???” Mom said with a worried but angry voice. “We were worried about you” my dad said more calmly. “I’m so sorry officers and thank you so much, we apologize for this” my dad said to the police officers. “Oh no don’t, it’s our job. Next time kid don’t skip school, alright?” The police officer said to me. I nodded with a slight smile and they headed outside. When they were gone my parents started yelling and I couldn’t even understand a word they were saying. While they are yelling and making no sense what so ever, i could hear joe’s voice again. Even though it’s very chaotic i could still focus on his voice, i have to go see him. I looked at my parents and said: “I’m fine, i was at Mary’s place, we have a project together and we lost track of time.” I haven’t talked to Mary in so long, but she was the first person to pop in my head so i just said her name. “You could have called and said you’re going to her place” my dad said. My mom on the other hand said: “what about school Emma?? You didn’t go to school, where were you really?” “Mom! I told you, we asked for permission to leave school and work on the project, I’m so tired can i go to my room now?” I lied and I’m pretty sure my mother didn’t believe a single word coming out of my mouth, but she just went to the living room and I hurried upstairs to my bedroom. When i opened the door i could see the portal again, at the wall in my room. I closed the door instantly and put my bag on my bed, i could hear us talking again. But this time it’s not on the bridge, this time it’s the first day we ever saw each other or actually the first time i saw him. I was a freshman and he was a junior, my name is Emma and his name was Joe. Our love was like no other, every second I thought about him, every moment of my life. I thank my brain for making these portals that I don’t know what exactly they are. My longing for him created portals for me to see him again, but maybe this is something bigger than this. I stepped into the portal without looking behind, there i was walking into school feeling so nervous. And there he was, walking behind me with his hood and earphones on, not caring about the world. I have never seen such an attractive face in my whole life and in that moment the most embarrassing thing happened to me, my nose started bleeding, how ironic!! I was so shocked by both Joe’s presence and my nose bleed because i have never had any nose bleeds so why now!! This sudden blood made me so shocked that i dropped my phone and books that i was holding, Joe suddenly stopped and removed his earphones. He started gathering the books and he didn’t even look at my face, when he was about give them to me he looked at me and was terrified, he saw all the blood on my face. “WOAH!! Are you okay?” He said to me with a really worried voice. “Oh I don’t know, i never had any nose bleeds!” I said. “Are you new here? I can show you the nurse’s office.” Joe said. And he didn’t take his eyes of my face, that made my cheeks the same color as the blood from my nose. I took my books and picked up my phone and followed him to the nurse’s office. First day at a new school and the first place i go to is the nurse’s office, i used to think that I wasn’t very lucky, but i got to meet the love of my life on this special day. The nurse told me that it was because of the heat and dryness, nothing serious. But Joe didn’t leave me, he stayed there the whole time. After resting for about half an hour i headed to class and joe was beside me showing me the way. I looked at joe and laughed. Joe looked at me and said: “what?” With half a smile. “Not so pretty to see me like this for the first time” i said with a laugh. And what shocked me even more was joe’s response : “actually I wasn’t going to say this but i think you’re the most beautiful thing i have ever laid eyes on!” I was so shy by his comment and didn’t say anything. At that moment i arrived at my class and said bye to Joe, that’s when the portal showed up again! I stepped through it into my bedroom again, and again i had spent so many hours there that it’s morning now. I didn’t get any sleep and i have to go to school because I skipped school yesterday, this thing is getting out of hand! I looked at my phone to check the time and it was 7:15 AM I don’t have much time till class, so i took a quick shower and dressed up real quick and grabbed my bag and headed downstairs, i was so tired and so hungry. I had just noticed that i only ate an apple yesterday morning, nothing else!! This time i had to eat something before i go, what if the portal showed up again. I found my mom in the kitchen talking with my dad, actually whispering not talking. When they heard my footsteps they stopped talking. They called me and said that they are very worried about me, I’ve been skipping school and my mom noticed that I didn’t eat at the house, and I’ve been very secretive. I just told them that i ate at my friend’s house and they don’t have to worry and I’ve been working so much on this project,that doesn’t really exist. I’ve made so many lies and if my parents ask mary and she denies that I’ve been at her place, I’m going to be in trouble. My parents are even more worried because when Joe passed away, I didn’t do anything for days, didn’t eat, didn’t sleep and didn’t even talk. At that time they sent me to a therapist who told them that this will pass by time. But it didn’t!. I had made my way to school and nothing unusual happened today, I thought the portal would show up again but it didn’t. I finished school and headed home, feeling so sad because I didn’t get to go to the portal today, I didn’t get to hear joe or see him. I tried to act normal i front of my family but on the inside i was dying. I couldn’t help it anymore and just said i was tired and wanted to sleep, and I really was sleepy and tired. Not sleep in two days can make a person go crazy. I went to my bedroom and I actually fell asleep right away, that’s when i woke up by his voice again. Joe’s voice, I don’t want this to end but i also can’t stay like this all the time, when i go through the portal i just leave all my life behind. I haven’t talked to anyone but my mom and dad. I opened my eyes and the portal was at the wall again, “what would happen if I don’t go through it?” I thought to myself. I kept on thinking and I actually had a brilliant idea, i had stopped time before, maybe i could do it again! I quickly got up and stared into the portal and said: “STOP” I didn’t know if it worked because i could still hear his voice, so i went to the window and looked outside, and it did work!! I saw a woman and her child crossing the street but frozen in the middle of it. The odd thing is that that didn’t seem to affect the portal. Maybe I could stay in the portal all this time and then come out of it and unfrozen time again and just carry on with my daily life. I stepped into the portal and this time it was our first date, it was at a carnival. Joe and i were holding hands and walking into the carnival and i looked genuinely happy back then, we played some games and ate cotton candy and popcorn. Joe pointed at a lady who’s in costume and her whole face and body are covered and blood and said: “she looks like someone!” And just burst out laughing. “Ha Ha very funny!!” I said with an annoyed voice but also burst out laughing with him. I was afraid to ride rollercoasters and Joe made me do it with him, i used to regret doing that but looking at it now, I’m so happy i made those memories with him. After hours of walking around and playing games, Joe took me to see the stars. And we had our first kiss there! I was looking at this memory and sobbing. That’s when the portal showed again, and I’m back into my bedroom yet again. My trick did work, everything is still frozen, i said: “move” and looked out the window, the woman and her child continued walking and life carried on, but my heart didn’t. I felt so empty, I thought these memories would heal me but they destroyed me even more. Seeing those memories made me miss him even more. I can’t carry on with this, that morning i went to school and acted normal, talked to a few of my old friends that I haven’t talked to in months. And while i was walking in the isle i could hear girls talking about me: “I wonder how she can handle it, it’s his anniversary in a few days” and another girl who seems to be a new student responded :”who’s anniversary?” “Her boyfriend, he died almost two years ago, drowning accident.” The girl responded to her. I felt a sudden pain my chest and hurried to the bathroom, I couldn’t breathe. Hearing others talk about him hurts even more. That’s when he showed up in front of me, not in a portal and not a dream. He showed up with his own body and soul and was looking directly at me. “Emma, it’s all in your head.” Said Joe. It was later known that Emma had lost her mind after Joe passed away, imagining things and hallucinating. She saw the only open window for her was to be with her beloved Joe, she didn’t want anything else in the whole wide world. Sometimes you meet your other half and you literally can’t live without him, but Emma was finally with him.