text: Our mom always told us that if we ever went to the outhouse, we pray after we shit. Otherwise the toilet monster would grab us and throw us down into a Great Lake of poo. What a load of bullshit! It took me 6 fucking years to finally realize that all she’s been saying was made up stories to get us to pray. Pray to the food, pray to the dog, pray to the goddamn truck we use to get into town each day. Otherwise some monster would come to get us because of a spooky family curse! WOoOoOoO! I even asked Kyle if his family did the same. But he thought I was joking! My mother made a fool of me and my siblings. So, I’m not gonna pray anymore. Starting with that goddamn toilet monster! -- I remember seeing Dan acting more and more rebellious recently. He even began telling us how we should stop praying and how everything was bowlshit. But we didn’t want to make mamma sad. We didn’t wanna die either. So we continued to pray, doing it honestly too. But not Dan, he only did it to make it seem like he was in the loop. Whatever that meant. Plus, he even began to pop outside in the bushes, but mamma wasn’t so happy about that. Saying he should do it in the out house. “Why should I shit in the out house if there is a monster in there?!” Mamma said “Because if we don’t the toilet monster gets mad!” “And if we don’t pray it also gets mad?” “Our fecal matter are offering’s to the beast. Cease the offerings and it will strike back!” “Whatever!” Then, Dan just stormed off and went into outhouse as mamma told him. Me and the other younger siblings gathered to see if Dan was actually pooping or not. We heard a plop, but no praying. He even said “Fuck you! I hope you eat my shit you god damn shit monster!” We all got worried and tried to pray for Dan, hoping it would help. “Thank you Toilet! Thank you Toilet!” Dan would walk out as we prayed and look at us with a strange look. “What the hell are y’all doing?” But that’s when the monster came out. A wet, light blue, 3 fingered, clawed hand grabbed Dan’s head and yanked him back in. He scream as he held onto the door frame. We all looked in and saw the Toilet Monster for the very first time. As it was light blue, had yellow fins on its arms, and a huge one on its back. It almost looked like a man, but it had some weird round mouth with sharp teeth and a scary look in its yellow eyes. Angry. Really angry. “Help me!” We all tried to pull Dan away, but the monster one arm was too strong. It’s fingers even began to dig in Dan’s head, making small cracking sounds. “Ow! Ow! Ow!” But that’s when we all lost the tug of war. Dan was yanked into the toilet along with the monster. We tried to see where they went, only to find poo and pee. We never knew where Dan went. Not even mamma knew, as she cried over the toilet praying for Dan to be safe. But all we knew was one thing. Pray, pray, pray. Otherwise we might end up like Dan. No one wants that.