text: Hannah O Connor looked at the invitation on the iPhone screen which lay on the solid industrial style wooden kitchen table. She could sense the bumps of the joins without even touching the table, old habit of rubbing the tips of her fingers left to right while she pondered what to do. “Class of 95!” It screamed. Dear lord had it been so long? Everyone must have changed so much, with the freedoms of youth left beind and the ravages of having children played on the lined faces and stretched bodies of her old classmates. Although sneaky looks through Facebook showed a number of them cheating for sure! Lip fillers and Botox. Seems to Hannah the harder you have to try the older you seem anyway. Stacey, Hannah’s younger sister came into the kitchen grabbed her phone whilst shouting at her two beautiful devil children “Max! Liam! Say goodbye to grandad we have to pop to the shops to get something for dinner before Daddy gets home!” Stacey whirled out, armed with her phone, car keys and armload of bags with kid paraphernalia. Her sister singing “Bye I’ll see you tomorrow” then the beep of the automatic boot opening of the car as Stacey made the bustling noises of a busy working mum who never had enough hours in the day. Sounds of Jim kissing his grandchildren goodbye echoed through the hall, it was a sight to behold. Hannah could feel the love in the air just from hearing the squeal from his only two precious grandchildren. Hannah always felt a tinge of sadness that she herself was never able to have children, she knew her father loved nothing more at Christmas time and other celebrations as a house full of families especially children and the noisy clatter of fun they bring. James. He had been in Hannah’s mind ever since she saw the invitation on the phone. She had seen him a number of times over the years, had seen him grow into the strong capable man she knew he would become. Not classically handsome and with some scaring along his right cheek from the car accident all those years ago, oh but when he smiled! It would melt the hardest of hearts! The corner of his mouth seem to touch his eyes, such a genuine sweet guy. His wife was a lucky lady! Four children seemed to keep him fit, he was such an active dad. His wife Marie was forever putting pictures of their happy family on social media. Hannah was happy for him, even though he was the only person to make her feel truly alive, their happy ever after wasn’t to be. She’d go to the reunion. Hopefully Marie would be there. Hannah’s old best friend from school being there would prevent Hannah doing anything she’d regret! Two days before the high school reunion, Jim O Connor came into his room to look for his reading glasses to read ‘You and me little bear’ to young Liam and Max when he saw Stacey on all fours rummaging through his wife side of the wardrobe. “Honey.. you Ok? You loose something?“ ”Hi Dad, no, sorry, I didn’t loose anything, I was hoping to borrow the dress mum wore to my wedding for the school reunion on Friday night.” “I thought you said that invite was for Hannahs school year?” ”Well yes it is, I know but I was invited too, as I had a lot of the same friends as Hannah from then that I haven’t seen in years and I’d love to catch up, anyway I had no luck at the shops for an outfit“ Stacey moaned. Jim smirked, “you hardly need to buy more!“ “Dad I want to look classy, not like so many women my age in their 40’s trying to pass for being in their 20’s! When I was looking for a dress like mums and I thought maybe I could just borrow her one, it was beautiful and she spent a small fortune on it!” Jim looked forlorn for a second and said “Stace you’re right, it was a beautiful dress, she would want to to have it, Lord knows she would.“ “You sure Dad?” ”Sweetie yes it would bring back lovely memories of happier times“ A yell from downstairs let Jim know his grandsons patience was running out, he picked up his glasses, winked at Stacey “Maybe leave the fancy hat behind though” then hollered “Boys I’m coming go sit by grandads armchair, It’s story time!” Hannah smiled at the exchange she heard upstairs between her dad and sister. Since their mum moved into the care home six months ago after a stroke, it left an emptiness in the family homes atmosphere which sometimes could be hard to bear but it was a lovely nod to the style her mother enjoyed. Even though Stacey was a couple of inches taller than their mother, she would look very elegant in that dress. Hannah actually felt a little pang if envy! She moved from the fireplace where she was keeping an eye on her nephews to make space for her father to perch in his favorite spot to read to ‘his special boys’. “Ah hem, once there were two bears, big bear and little bear...” Jim began as his two grandsons, looking up, eyes wide, smiled, rooted to the spot on the fluffy mat in front of the armchair to hear their favorite story. James looked at himself in tall mirror in the bedroom as he did up his tie. “Marie, are you ready - the babysitters here?” Marie hopped on one foot coming out of the bathroom trying to squeeze her right foot into her black high heel shoe. “Yep nearly ready, God I think even my feet are gaining weight!” Marie complained. She always got quiet stressed about old school reunions. “You look beautiful as ever, you’ll knock ‘em dead! I bet you’ll even have the honorable Judge Sean Sullivan groveling all over you again” ”Stop teasing! He’s not a judge he’s a barrister” James pulled his wife close and smiles but before he could roam his coarse mechanics firm hands on her new dress Marie broke away, “the babysitter...I’ll let her in!” Later that evening as his wife Marie danced and gaggled with old friends, the band played Blurs “Park life” and James stopped in his tracks as he saw Hannah come in the door, it couldn’t be he thought. Stacey smiled at him and held her arms open “James I’m so glad you’re here!” “Stacey! Stacey. It’s great to see you! You look beautiful!” “ You look great too! A bit pale? Anyway I know I was the class of ‘96 and technically I’m gate crashing but I just wanted to see how all of Hannah’s old pals were going, you know, besides I haven’t seen many in years and there’s so many people I never had the opportunity to thank properly after- you know...’ James did know, unconsciously he touched his right cheek forever scarred physically and mentally from a car crash that cost him the love of his life back in ‘95. ”I know I bet people still think I was drinking that night and that the shock of the crash sobered me up“ James said, almost to himself. Stacey stood right in front of James “James that’s enough, you need to let that guilt go, I was there- I saw you leave with Hannah, she had a couple of Bacardi Breezers but you said you weren‘t drinking as your mother told you she’d have your ‘guts for garters’ if anything happened her car” James smiled her lobsided smile and thanked Stacey. “I appreciate that Stacey, I know you‘re right but every now and then I guess I need to hear it out load, hey is your Dylan here?” Stacey laughter, “Are you nuts? My husband miss the golf open to socialize with us- not a chance! When I mentioned it he said he would be feeling sick this Friday night! Cheeky sod! He did say to tell you guys he said hello” ”Tell him he’s a lucky man! A couple of beers on the coach watching sport on a Friday night is definitely more my scene too” James conceded. Hannah stood next to both people in this world whom she treasured the most. it was lovely to hear the easy banter between them. Hannah had long ago accepted just being able to be here and see them was as good as she could hope for. “God it’s good to see you Stacey, you bring so many good memories of Hannah, I feel like she’s here with us“ “You too James, I know she would have loved to see you so happy, oh is that Marie? She is stunning, oh wait that’s not Sean oh what’s his name again...?” James followed Stacey’s gaze over his right shoulder and sure enough Sean Sullivan was trying his charms on James’ wife, whilst she was far too polite to rebuff the overweight bespectacled balding redhead directly, Marie was slowly inching away. “Ha ha some things never change! Sean still has a soft spot for your Marie! I’ll go rescue her, I haven’t seen her since she was pregnant on your first baby!” James as still laughing as Stacey walked over to hold out an olive branch to Marie and for a moment there, somehow it was like the good old days, before that crash and his world changed, it felt like summer 1995 as if time had stood still.