text: Atlas was my only friend. My computer keys, worn and scratched with the pain of a martyr, were my link to happiness. Now that my keyboard was somewhere in the dumpster, my happiness was too. The darkness surrounded everything here at the Fawkes, but you could still see the outlines. Alcohol hung in the air, a smell that had never vacated its position. No one that found their way here forgot the experience, that was for sure. The glasses gave an escape, a door that we all strived to find in the bottom of the barrel. The Fawkes wasn't my home, though. I didn't have one. "Leaving already, Nika?" Jim, the bartender, was washing up behind the counter. They never miss anything, bartenders, you can't hide from them. "Yeah, it's getting late." I turned to go but rushed back to grab one more drink. You can never have too many. The night sky was muddled with brown, like dried blood on a piece of metal. If it was blood, though, then who was bleeding? I heard Atlas's impersonal voice telling me "Cannot determine, Nainika," and I laughed. It was nice to feel like I had a friend again. I was in Arctica, where the settlements were kind and welcoming. They gave a chance for a new life, one without the prejudice of the real world. I'd come here with the last of the scraps I made from animatron building, but it wasn't enough to live on. It was times like those, times where my stomach begged and pleaded for something to fill it, that made me miss Atlas. When I made it back to my dark hotel room, the cold biting at my shoulders, I was greeted by Penny. She was lounging on the couch with her socks off and watching a live broadcast. "What are you doing back so early?" Penny always talked with a sort of tone that made you think she was interrogating you. She was a great roommate, sure, but she was more of a partner than a friend. "I came home... you know... with my feet," I said. The Uni-heaters felt like warm wind on my bare arms. I settle onto the couch and shoved Penny's legs to the floor, much to her dismay. "Nainika." I kept looking at the TV, not talking to Penny. The odd thing was, though, that she didn't pry. "What did you just say?" She looked at me sideways, questioning my words. "I didn't say anything," Penny said. She sized me up for a second, and then turned her head back to the screen. The documentary on the screen was about a whale that swam across the ocean to find its daughter. It was a cute whale, if you could even call a whale cute. "I bet it's fake." Penny was always the optimist. I chuckled to myself, my fingers still flexing to combat the frostbite. The whale had a white birthmark, which was odd. I'd never seen a whale with a white birthmark. Then again, there were a lot of things I hadn't seen. "That's sweet of you, Pen," I teased, whacking her with a pillow. She kept her eyes glued to the screen, not acknowledging me. Well, some roommate. I went to the kitchen, still wary of the voice, and started to heat up a pizza. There were no good flavors, so I had to have Jalapeño Delight Magnificence, the worst name anyone would ever hear. The supposedly green peppers were now a sickly yellow, and my stomach turned in disgust. It was a great day for disgusting frozen food. "Nainika," the voice said. I had heard it before, it seemed, in another world. I could hear the flat tone, the pointed words. What was it? "Nainika." Atlas. He was calling for me. I grabbed my coat and rushed out the door, let the wind blow in behind me. The snow piled down on my hood but I didn't care. "ATLAS!" I screamed on and on into the darkness of the night, letting it echo into the glaciers. "ATLAS!" "Nainika," he whispered. It seemed almost like a song, lilting its way into my ears and taunting me. "Where are you!?" I couldn't hear any footsteps, but I have no idea why I expected any from an AI program. My chest felt raw, my heart pounding against my lungs and beating faster. Where was he? I needed him. I needed my only friend. "Why do you cry, Nainika?" "Because I have no purpose. You heard them. That's why you're here." "You have a purpose to me. Without you, I would not be able to understand the complications of human life. However little, that is a purpose." "...It's not the same." "What about your situation is not the same to the one that I described?" "Well, you don't count." "Why do I not count?" "Because I have a purpose in your mind, but you're not the world." "How am I not the world?" "Well..." The tears slipped down my cheeks as I held in the words like vomit. I would never release them, no, not even to Atlas. He would never understand, he'd try to minimize it. What if I just wanted to feel sad? What if I didn't feel like rationalizing it? The memory jarred my mind, the snow piercing my skin like spears. "Why do you cry?" Atlas's figurine appeared in the screen. The snow piercing my skin, the voice disappearing in the wind. Atlas would come back. He would. I knew him better than to leave me. When you come back, Atlas, I'll tell you all the things I've learned. I'll tell you about Jim the bartender and all of the stories he tells. I'll tell you about those documentaries that Penny loves to watch. You'd want to hear about that, wouldn't you? And I'd tell you all of my stories, all of the things I've done. You'd be surprised the places I've gone. I'm here, though. I'm here, waiting for you.