text: I am almost here, with you. Do you smell me? Can you feel my touch against your skin? Is that the air you breathe, the same as what I have already used? Everywhere, always, I am nearly present. Remember when you curled under the duvet, wondering whether that horror film was a hint of truth - is there a monster under the bed, is there something standing right behind you, staring at you with large, unblinking, aching eyes? Recall all those conspiracy stories. I am related to many; the aliens in stars, the ghost of your nemesis, the god in life and in death. There is always potential for my existence. I live behind a veil, an intangible existence, but I am always ready. There is only a button to be pressed, one glowing particle to be dropped, a solitary slip of your attention. Allow me to be. A strike from possibility, I punch into existence. Then, I am real. Then you know my name. My name is risky, so I have many pseudonyms. But you dare not forget my name. My breath against your skin makes your stomach curl. You feel me, and your body flushes with pyrexia, but you have no time to sweat in the heat of the moment, when I am moments from licking you. You tease and test me when you want me. When you don’t want me here with you, you try to run, but then you melt for me. Then we are one, you are me, you are free. MAD. You think my name is violence, or passion, romance, danger. Don’t you understand me? Do not mistake my faceless identity. I am none of them. (I do not feel like you, I need only one thing (or practically three) - to exist. No matter by which colour I take, I leave the same mark on all of you. I am truly indiscriminate. Learn from me. Understand me. I have no consciousness and hence no conscience. My fear equates to my burdens, nothing. I am free. Is that not what you want to be? Let me show you the way. I can be small, gentle, there for you in your darkest hour and ages to illuminate the dark corners and the shadows under your bed, a beacon with which you can ensure help before the dawn arrives. But you never can forget that I am an entity that is foreign, benign, something ‘wrong’. You warn that child, don’t touch me, don’t get too close. Still they come. I don’t mind. Use me when you are cold, empty and hungry, for then I exist. Don’t look away from me, and remember what you have learnt. I can never be covert, so do not forget me. Soak in the warmth and comfort, admire how tall and still I can be, but see that flicker in my attitude, yes, that I can devour the buffet of your material life.