text: Why had I ever agreed to play this game of all games? Now what was I going to do? Let me back up to last night. There’s a group of us who get together in some combination or other to play table games every other Friday night. There aren’t any rules about which game or games we play or who we can invite. There isn’t a membership or anything like that; if you come you get to play. The numbers can run from four to more than a dozen, but it’s usually six or eight. Last night there were only five of us. Ted and Mary have been married for a year and half or so and got to know each other at these games nights. Laura and Ashleigh have been partners for more than ten years and, if we had membership rolls, would be charter members. I was invited by Laura and have been coming, off and on, since the second meeting. It’s a great group and I usually really enjoy myself. So here we were, the five us. Now, five isn’t the best number of people for some games so we ended up talking more than playing. Talking and drinking to be more accurate. I was hosting and had no idea so few would show, so there was more than enough wine for everyone. After trying a couple of different games and realizing none of them grabbed any of us, we switched to the oversized colouring book I kept around for those occasions when keeping hands busy kept conversation going. What I didn’t expect was for Ashleigh to suggest we play Truth or Dare while we worked on a medieval battle scene. After some humming and hawing, we all agreed. Even after agreeing to it, I figured it would mostly be an opportunity for us to embarrass each other by asking about stupid stuff we did in college or high school. In other words, I was fairly sure it would be mostly Truth with very little Dare. In the first round, everyone chose Truth. The four of them found out I had only used cocaine once, and it was in a doctor’s office, which seemed to disappoint them. The other truths that came out were similarly interesting but generally innocuous. I was the only un-partnered member of the group so I probably should have expected I’d get something relating to my continued state of singleness. I don’t know what Ted was expecting when he asked me how many dates I’d gone on over the past year but when I said “None,” he seemed taken aback and all four of them shared a significant look. There are many annoying things about being single but most of them relate less to singleness than to other people’s response to you being single. I had no idea these two couples were so interested in why I was single, to say nothing of why they wanted to “rectify the problem.” The third round started after I got back from using the bathroom and by then everyone was “well-oiled” as my Dad would have said, except me: I don’t drink. There was a bit of a different vibe in the room, the four of them making eye contact with each other but avoiding making eye contact with me. I sat down and asked, “Who goes next?” Laura asked Ted how many women he’d slept with before Mary. He answered nonchalantly with, “Six” and a shrug. Mary laughed. I began to wonder if this meant things were about to go down a path we might regret later. But then Ashleigh turned to me. “Why haven’t you dated anyone for a year?” she asked. I’m a pretty good sport when it comes to games. I’ve always felt if you aren’t going to enter fully into the game then don’t play. Watch from the sidelines and make snarky remarks until the players throw you out or read a book or play a different game but if you are going to play, then play. Ashleigh’s question was one I simply would not answer. I almost wrote “could not” answer but that’s not entirely true. I could physically answer the question but, even after a year, it was still too raw, too personal, too bloody painful to even think about, let alone talk to anyone else about. As I was going through this in my head, I realized everyone was waiting for my answer. “Well?” asked Ashleigh with an arched eyebrow. “It’s Truth or Dare. We’ve had lots of Truth, you wanna Dare?” slurred Mary. I was still silent, so they started a ragged chant of “Dare. Dare. Dare!” What could I do? I said, “Dare.” I think Ashleigh and Laura had been thinking about this for a while because they looked at each other for a second and Laura said, “You have to go to the train station tomorrow morning, get on the first train leaving the station, sit beside the first person you see, and get their phone number before the next stop.” My jaw dropped and I gaped at the four of them. I had expected something stupid like stand on my head and drink from a glass or something mildly salacious like kiss one of them. But this, this was awful. “Umm, I’m not so sure about this,” I said. “Look at me. I’m not a small person and you’ve all had opportunity to enjoy the fact that I’m intimidating sometimes, however that works. If I sit beside almost anyone and even say hello, I’ll probably get arrested.” “Well,” Tom said owlishly, “you probably should’ve thought of that before you decided to play.” He had me there. I cursed internally but did my best to put a happy, or at least neutral, look on my face. I hoped none of them would be in a state to remember any of this tomorrow. “Okay,” I said, “so who’s up next?” The rest of the round was all Truth and I couldn’t even muster the mental energy to try for revenge. After the round was over, everyone decided they may as well stay at my place and finish up the open bottles of wine and crash on the floor or wherever. I felt this was my best chance to get them so liquored up they’d never remember anything tomorrow, so I surreptitiously opened an extra bottle and got pouring. The next morning, despite the number of empty bottles, all four of them, dammit, were up, remembered, and wanted to take me to the train. Ugh! We all piled into Laura’s Subaru and headed to the train station. It was early. I wasn’t expecting a lot of people to be on the train but I didn’t know if this would make it better or worse. They dropped me off, made sure I had enough money for the round trip and said a cheery, “Bye! See you later! Can’t wait to find out what happens!” I caught the first train; there was only one person in the car. Attractively, if unconventionally, dressed even with, God forbid, crocs. Why had I never believed in love at first sight?