text: Moscow, December 18th, 2021 I felt exhausted. It had been a long journey and I felt the sharp pain from the blisters on my feet with every step I made. But the night was fast approaching and the temperature was dropping drastically with every minute past since sundown. I needed to find a place to settle for the night, somewhere that could protect me from the elements. As the sky was getting darker, the city started to pick up a nefarious vibe. With every direction I turned, I saw evil looks lurking from behind the flickering impromptu fires that littered the dark street corners, the kind of sinister looks from the steely cold eyes that told me to get lost or else. I found a dark abandoned building nearby. These places are notoriously dangerous at night and could harbour the most vicious populations but beggars can not be choosers, besides, I really couldn’t walk any further in this condition and I was used to this way of life. I found a corner that shielded me from the cold wind and snow. I was beyond hungry and soon asleep. ‘Alexei, look what I found!’ ‘What did you find Igor?’ ‘A Chink!’ Loud laughing noises and bright light on my face woke me up to a young man standing in front of me with a torchlight in his hand. He looked in his early 20s, dark hair and was in a thick green winter coat. A second young man about the same age came right after him and looked at me from a safe distance with a suspicious gaze. He was in a leather jacket and had fairer hair than the first man. I instinctively grabbed the knife in my pocket. ‘Igor, could you not.’ ‘Not what?’ ‘Not use that word. I don’t like it.’ ‘Oh, really, what do you care?’ ‘Chinese people are people just like us, Igor!’ ‘Sure, Jesus, never knew you are such a saint.’ ‘Shut the fuck up Igor. Hey, you, still alive?’ He was obviously talking to me. ‘Yes.’ I nodded. ‘You speak Russian?’ ‘Only a little.’ I covered my face from the torchlight. Alexei pushed Igor’s hand down and came closer to me. ‘You don’t sound Russian, you Chinese?’ ‘Yes.’ ‘You alone?’ ‘Why? You gonna rob me?’ ‘I’m just trying to help, is all. I will leave you alone if you wish to but it’s getting too cold for you to survive the night in a place like this.’ ‘Hey, Alexei, not our business, let’s go.’ Igor nudged Alexei but he held up his hand. ‘We are the nightguards that look after this site. You are welcome to come to our office with us, it’s just around the corner and it’s warm there.’ I was still holding on to my knife tightly as I slowly got up from the cold concrete floor. Suddenly I felt dizzy and fell against the wall. ‘Hey, hey, you ok?’ Alexei caught hold of my arm and steadied me. ‘Look, I don’t know what happened to you and I’m not gonna ask if you don’t want to say but you are safe and you are coming with me ok?’ ‘Ok.’ I nodded and held onto Alexei’s arm as he slowly helped me get to my feet and walk to his office. ‘Igor, finish doing the round then get some snacks from the shop, will you?’ Alexei took out his wallet and stuffed some money into Igor’s hands. ‘I don’t believe this is fucking happening! Back in a few minutes.’ Igor reluctantly took the money and shuffled on. With each step I took, the half-healed blisters broke again and fresh sharp pains shoot up my feet like electric shocks. But we made it to his office quickly and as he opened the door, a sudden flood of light and warmth washed over me. ‘Sit.’ Alexei pulled out a chair for me and took out a pack of cigarettes from his jacket pocket. ‘You don’t mind, do you?’ ‘No.’ I shook my head and smiled faintly. Alexei lighted up his cigarette, put the kettle on, pulled out a chair for himself, and sat next to me. ‘A woman like you, in a place like this, alone. Hmmm...’ He puffed on his cigarette and breathed out a cloud of smoke. ‘Is there a particular place you were going to?’ ‘No.’ ‘No? I see, a woman with few words. Maybe you are just hungry and lack energy. Don’t worry, Igor will be back soon, in the meantime...’ He suddenly stood up as he heard the kettle was boiled and went to the desk in the corner of the room. ‘Coffee?’ ‘Hot water if you don’t mind.’ ‘Just hot water?’ ‘Yes, thank you.’ I nodded. ‘Ok, you got it.’ He nodded and poured hot water into a cup and brought it to me. ‘Here ya, hold on to the cup and warm your hands up. ‘Thank you.’ ‘No worries.’ Alexei sat back in his chair and puffed another smoke. ‘You sound well educated I must say. It is strange that you end up like this. Look, I mean you no harm, and I probably understand a lot more than you think, you can talk to me if you wish. We got all night. But it’s ok if you don’t want to.’ ‘It’s ok.’ I slurped some hot water and nodded. ‘We can talk.’ ‘Yeah?’ Alexei looked up and smiled. ‘Yeah.’ I smiled back faintly. ‘I, um, many years ago, decided to become a ghost.’ ‘A ghost?’ ‘Yes. Wiping myself off the grid completely, become none existence. I am no one, so I can be anyone, anywhere, doing anything.’ ‘That sounds, insane.’ Alexei pulled another puff and continued. ‘But you don’t appear insane to me. There’s a thin line between genius and madness and I guess you are the former.’ ‘I don’t know about that but I realized since an early age that the only way to know the whole truth is not to be bound by the biased truth. Only then, one can be truly free to choose one’s own identity and life path.’ ‘And how free are we talking about here?’ ‘I have traveled on foot across continents, slept under streetlights, ship decks and stars studded night skies. I have witnessed exceptional cruelty and tremendous kindness. All I learned is this: there’s no good or evil, we are all capable of anything. You live what you manifest. And you Alexei, manifest positivity in this world.’ Suddenly Alexei paused and looked at me, ‘I have heard that gods walk among people in ancient Greek legends, but...’