text: I saw this girl. She was having a hard time getting a garbage bag in the dumpster so I gave her a hand. She seemed scared at first; it *was* pretty dark but I just asked if she wanted some help. She said, Sure." "Man that bag smelled sooo fucking bad. I couldn't put my finger on it but it definitely smelled like something rotting." "What happened after you helped her?" "She said thanks, and told me her name was Chelsea. I said my name was Mike and started to walk off." "Thats when she asked you to help her with something else?" "Yeah man, she was pretty hot so I kinda just said fuck it and went to help her." "Did she take you into the house or did you go around back?" "We went around back at first. She had this weird hole she had dug, said she had removed a dead tree earlier that day. Asked if I would help her fill it in. She had some blisters from all the digging she had done earlier and didn't want them to pop so I said I would help." "Did she show you the blisters?" "Yeah man, they were pretty gnarly. She had two big ones on her palm right under her fingers and another one in between her thumb and index finger. Shit was pretty nasty." "Alright well what happened after you finished filling in the hole." "She told me she wanted to thank me for all my help by making me dinner. I was pretty hungry by then so I said okay and went in the house." "You just walked into a strangers house that you just met?" "Yeah, like I said, I was pretty hungry." "Okay, well what happened when you went inside?" "Well, she asked if I was okay with steak and I said hell yeah I'm okay with steak. She laughed a bit and got some steaks out of the fridge. She asked if I would light the grill on the patio for her and she would do the rest." "This grill was on the back patio, the one you had just used to get into the house?" "Yeah, that's the one. Anyway, I turned that sucker on and she came out with the steaks. She opened the grill and let out a scream. I was like, what the fuck is going on? and she said, "Uh, nothing, there's just a dead squirrel in the grill. I'm gonna turn it off and do the steaks inside. You can just leave it in there and I'll take care of it tomorrow." "I was definitely okay with leaving that squirrel in there. I hate touching dead animals, they give me the creeps. I always think they're gonna come back to life right before I touch em." "So you never looked inside the grill?" "Nah, I didn't want to see that poor squirrel." "Okay well did you go back inside at this point or stay outside?" "I was gettin bit by bugs pretty bad so I went in. I asked if she had any itch cream for the bug bites cuz they were startin to itch real bad and I hate that feeling. She said she had some but it was in the upstairs bathroom. She told me to go up the stairs and it was the second door on the left." "So what happened when you went upstairs?" "Well, I got to the top and went towards the second door on the left, but got distracted by this rad painting she had along the back wall. It was this badass dragon lighting a town on fire." "Is that when you first smelled it?" "Yeah dude, it was horrible. The same shit that we had taken to the trash for sure. My nose never forgets." "Did you follow the smell?" "Yeah, I was gonna take out the trash bag for her since she had been so nice and all but when I went into the room there was nothing there but the smell." "There was nothing in the room?" "I mean, there was a bed and some old books and shit, but other than that I couldn't see anything. It was dark as hell in there and the light switch wasn't working. I tried feelin my way around the other side of the bed and that's when I tripped over something and fell on my face. I thought I was lucky cuz my face hit something kinda soft but when I felt what I landed on I was like what the fuck man, *not* cool. There was a fucking dude just layin on the ground sleepin, or at least, I thought he was sleepin." "You tried to wake him up?" "Yeah man, I just nearly made out with the guy, I figured the least I could do was invite him down for steak. I was being real nice about it but my man wasn't moving. I tried shakin him and kickin him a little but he was out." "You didn't notice the smell coming off of him?" "Not at first, I hit my nose pretty hard and it was bleeding a little so I just smelled that. After a few second though, that shit hit me hard." "Is that when she came up?" "Yeah dude, this chick wasn't right. She asked me what I was doing in this room and I told her I was just looking for the trash bag to take out." She said, "Oh don't worry about it, it's probably just a rat that died under the floorboards." "I started thinkin that makes sense but then I asked if her friend was okay. Should we see if he wants a steak too?" "Is that when she pulled out the knife." "Yeah bro, she went full psycho. She started running around the bed towards me with the knife in her hands. I was like what the fuck are you doing? She just kept running." "How did you get out?" "My mom was a crazy bitch too, she used to go off on meth binges and think I was a CIA agent trying to take her to the aliens so they could fuck with her. Anyway, she usually had a knife too so I just did what I used to do with her." "Which is?" "I drop kicked that bitch right in the chest. She dropped pretty fast and I got the fuck outta there." "Well son, I don't know whether to thank you or send you somewhere to get some help. This woman was the one that was responsible for all those college kids going missing. Apparently she had been luring em in, same as you, then killing em and cuttin em into pieces. We found 6 bodies so far on the property and I think we may find more." "Jeez man, I can't believe she was gonna cook me a steak. What if it was part of one of those dudes who went missing. Fucking sick man." "Yeah, well, I guess that's all we need from you for now. You might need to testify before a judge about what happened but other than that, I don't think we should be contacting you too much." "Alright man, well I guess I'll see you around." "Alright then, have a good night. And try to stay out of trouble." "Sure thing officer. I've had enough weird shit happen tonight already.