text: **These are the accounts journaled by an unknown man who is suspected to be deceased.** **We can not guarantee that the following events written happened or not... but how can we be for sure?** September 21st 2002 I suppose it is as good as a time as any to start a journal, from the direction my life has been going in these past few weeks I'll be dead within the year. In case anybody reads this I guess I should start from the beginning, get all the facts straight. Ever since I was young my life has been off by just a tick, one notch below normal. Something always seems to be just a bit different from another person's life, growing up in the mountains will do that to a boy. When I was younger I was scared of the woods that surround my home but with age that fear subsided, I guess I shouldn't have let that fear fade. When I was about eight years old my life took a turn for the worse. My life was invaded by a source of evil, something I can’t even describe. I guess some would call it a demon or a monster but I just call it my own personal hell. The first time this thing presented itself I was in my safe place. in the snow forming angels in the snow with my body. That is when I felt the wind, that warm wind that felt like an oven had just been opened right beside me, I stopped what I was doing and slowly got up, I was only eight years old and I still felt unsettled. When I was on my feet I looked around, the warmth had escaped past me, for it had only stayed for a moment, like a wave. That is when I felt as though I should go back home, I walked into my front door letting the screen door clap into its resting place. I took off my boots and smacked them onto the ground letting the snow flying. As I entered the house I was greeted immediately with the smell of freshly baked cookies immediately making me forget of the wave of warmth that I had just felt in the Mountains on a snowy December day. As I stepped into the kitchen my mother handed me a plate of cookies and told me to enjoy them in my room. I took the cookies and ran up the stairs to my attic room, the way they had it set up the ladder to the attic was always open so I could climb up. I had specifically asked for that room, it made me feel like a king living above everyone, and most of all I had a window where I could survey the whole front yard; there had been tons of amazing things I had seen, coyotes fighting, eagles carrying prey, and bears digging through our trash. Along with all these things I had seen I took notes of them, and categorized into folders like “weather” or “animal sightings”. By time I was 16 I had a full box of notes and sightings which sat right by that window. As I walked out of the kitchen with my fresh cookies I thought about snow angels again, and how good I was at making them, when I would get up to my room I would look down at the snow angels and take notes of how much better I had gotten at creating them. Once I got up the ladder I set the cookies down and began to remove my winter apparel, that is when I noticed something move in the treeline, I stopped and ran over to grab the notebook to be ready write down what it was. I was expecting it to be one of the foxes from the hole 30 meters into the woods, but that definitely was not the case. I squinted my eyes trying to find it but it seemed to disappear, after a few more moments of searching I gave up and went back to dressing into some comfortable clothes while munching on some cookies thinking about snow angels. That is when it happened, I turned around to grab my pajama shirt, but I saw something in my window and not just outside it was standing right up against the glass looking right at me, standing at what I estimate was at least 2 and a half meters tall with cracking gray skin that looked like tree bark. Its only facial feature were two empty holes that still felt as if they were staring at me. It’s arms were open as if they were inviting me outside, asking me to play, go make snow angels. I jumped back and screamed at my loudest while backed up against the window trying to hide behind a pile of clothes. It all gets hazy from here but from what I can remember the room began to vibrate, not like an earthquake or anything just a subtle vibration that tingled my feet, then came the noise, it was quiet at first but then got louder and higher in pitch. After that there was nothing I guess I had blacked out. I was brought back to consciousness by my mother shaking me asking if I was alright, i could see she was worried and crying, “how long had I been out?” I thought. My mom was hugging me and crying and saying she had called the ambulance and I would have to go to the hospital. When I was boarding the ambulance I noticed something odd, my snow angels, they were gone. I stayed in the hospital for a few hours until they diagnosed me, apparently I had some kind of seizure, but there was no way... those snow angels could never just go away that fast, and the snow wasn’t falling they were just gone replaced with flat white snow. From then on out I was diagnosed an epileptic, which made my life even more of a personal hell. They told me that when I started to feel how I felt before I blacked out to bite my tongue to help me feel better, so I did, every time I saw that... creature I bit my tongue but it was to no avail, it seemed to follow me throughout my years. I would look out my window at night and the flood light would show its shape just watching me, but I only blacked out if it got close, like it was antagonizing me showing me it had power over me. The problem I had growing up was that no one else would ever see it, because it would only show when I was alone, every time I told my mom about it she always told me “You are just seeing things because of the seizures hun, just bite your tongue and then everything will be A-OK.” then she would smile and go back to baking some new pastry. I do miss my mom, she was a great woman, what happened to her... it was just wrong, but poetic at the same time. I will always remember the trickle of blood that ran down her face and landed into the snow of the mountains, she was still shaking in my arms but there was nothing I could do. I reached forward and closed her eyes and whispered “Just bite your tongue ma... just bite your tongue and everything will be A-OK...”. From that moment on I vowed to never get close to someone again, I didn’t want to hurt anyone else, I was a danger to myself and others.