text: With all the stresses of modern life, it can be difficult to set aside time to clean your residence. One day you drop a few crumbs on the ground, and before you know it, your house is infested with ants! Here at Pest-Corp, we pride ourselves on our bug-blasting knowhow. Today, we're gonna give you some handy dandy tips and tricks on how to prevent ant infestations in your household. Tip one: Clean after every meal Especially if you’re a parent (kids are dumb, and messy). Nothing attracts ants faster than easy to aquire, freely available food. You're gonna want to look out for crumbs and leftovers as you clean. Tip two: Wipe up spills The residue of soft drinks gives off a very strong odor, and is a surefire way to bring ants into your home. Make sure to quickly wipe up any spills to prevent infestation. Additionally, use some disinfectant spray to seal the deal. Tip three: Practise good hygiene Because the ants view you as food, the scent that you and your family members give off can quickly attract ants to your location. Make sure that everybody in your house takes daily showers. Additionally, wear deodorant, and brush your teeth frequently. If anyone begins bleeding, wipe it up immediately. Try to keep all bodily odors to a minimum. The smell of tears is quite salty and potent to them, so avoid stress when possible. Here are some fun games you can play with your family to avoid stress: -Hide and seek -Tag -Chess -Checkers -Cards -Charades -Pictionary -Twister Tip four: Think twice before inviting over guests During a national emergency, sitting around in lockdown can be very isolating. However, it is important that you do not allow guests into your house unless absolutely necessary. Your guest might have a strong odor, allowing ants to track them. Even if somebody is banging at your door, it’s best not to let them in, and pretend like you’re not home. Tip five: Eliminate lines of sight Ants have poor vision, but if you’re not careful, they can see you roaming around outdoors, or through the windows of your house. In order to remain undetected by ant swarms, stay indoors. Shut your curtains, close your blinds, or nail blankets to your windows. If you do need to go outside for whatever reason, do it under the cover of night to avoid detection. Tip six: Avoid noise If an ant hears a large amount of commotion coming from your abode, it might prompt them to investigate. Try to avoid arguments, screaming, power tools, etc. If you know there is a concentration of ants within your area, make a plan with your family to eliminate as much noise as possible. Tip seven: Stockpile supplies In the event of a [REDACTED], it will be difficult to find an opportunity to leave your home. Make sure you have supplies you need saved up beforehand, such as: -Non perishable food items -Drinking water -Life straws -Clothing -Padlocks -First aid -A generator -Gasoline -Any kind of chemical freshener to mask your scent, like febreeze. -Firearms When stocking up, remember that too much is better than too little. Tip eight: Incorporate air fresheners into your outfit You know those little trees that you hang up in your car? You can actually make necklaces out of them. This is a very easy way to eliminate bodily odor, and it’s also quite fashionable. For added effect, hang them from the ceiling fans in your home. The more unnatural scents in your home, the more protected you are against an infestation. Tip nine: Avoid confrontation Although ants might not appear to be any more dangerous than the average home invader, they most certainly are. They move with incredible speed, and are prepared to devour your flesh. Only use firearms if you absolutely have to, as this creates a ring of noise with a radius of about one mile. If an ant enters your house, the best course of action is to take your family into a room, lock the door, stay away from the windows, and wait for the ant to leave. Tip ten: Know that, in the event of a [REDACTED], your demise is inevitable If you stay indoors, you will starve. If you risk leaving, you will eventually be torn to shreds by a mob of ants. One will see you, then alert the rest. You will be ripped limb from limb, mandibles digging into your flesh. When you stop struggling, they will bring you back to their festering hills, and consume you. There can be no hope, only delayal of the end. Know that you are fighting for the moment, and not the future. The festering wound that is humanity will heal. Buildings will fall, and hills shall be erected in their place. Ants will pour out into the streets, consuming and purging all in sight. When there is nothing left to consume, they will starve. Nature will once again reach an equilibrium. Civilization will fade, and God's work will be complete. He rests easy, knowing that the innocence and purity of all natural life shall be forever maintained. ////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////// We’d like to thank you for taking precious time out of your day to read this guide. If this helped you in any way, please consider donating to one of our fundraisers, or purchasing some merchandise on our website.