text: I turned down the volume in the car because I noticed squeak had grasped at the back of his head twice since we passed the five lamps on the north strand road. Probably didn't help the fact I let the tyre pressure down on his side, Ha! He must be having a bumpy time back there. The atmosphere was tense in the car so I made a move for the volume dial, I lingered my hand over it for a couple seconds and noticed Mick catch me eyes in the rear view mirror. "Leave it !! " , he says as I crack a grin from the side of my mouth eyes fixed on the traffic ahead coming up to the turn for Ringsend. "Not in the mood for talking Mick no haha! " I said speedily as the blaster we had leaving the gaff comes back up on me again." "Fuck off man, were fuckin red hot nock that music off will Ye! " Mick says tentatively mumbling at the end of the sentence. "We've gone over it a hundred times!!!" I said furiously I was just fed up of the lads going on like nervous pigeons. " Right , firstly I'm the only person that's getting nicked in this car for not being insured!! We get in to this gaff... yous just watch the match with Jay for a few minutes I'll be in the jacks for a few, once I'm out were back skating in the jammer! If we get stopped I'm telling Ye they'll take the car I'll be searched at best! There's no smell a green, we've nothin on us, don't be paranoid, relax the fuck will yous! Ye tell them I said I was picking me mrs up in town, yous haven't a clue what's going on!!! Once where finished, taxi into town, we hit the academy, back to my gaff, the key under the flowerpot was gone , the dog was going nuts, and there was no sign a me Mas car in the drive way". I felt like the lads were not confident about the plan or maybe they were just gettin cold feet, thinking about their day in court down the road backing my statement up in court. I suppose introducing coppers into their world, something they hadn't really got a clue about at the time is something to be nervous about. "Yous are flagged boys." I think to meself laughing at me own thoughts. Get linked to this or stutter when there talkin to Ye or give them any whiff of dishonesty? " You better get the fuckin Tin foil hats out boys haha. Suckers". Maybe they were right to be nervous. 5,000 is a lot of money and they were only gettin a thousand each. Fuckin part timers, I thought, as I pulled in outside Jays garden. "Squeak ! " I said enthusiastically. "Shut up fucking talking will Ye haha!!" . Jay already had the door of the house open before I could kill the engine. Strange I thought, but how and ever, I'm not gonna act surprised, and give this cunt a glimpse of nervousness after all he's the guest in this car not me. I'm a machine I'd smash this cunt up if it comes down to it. He pulls open the passenger door and jumps in. "What's the story pal," jay good to meet Ye pal Ye! " he says, "same bro what's up where we heading" I say as I turn the car outside the gaff and head back towards the quay! "Ehh, we need to spin around to me mates gaff I'm grabbing a bit of Hoover just to calm me down Ye!". " no boder where's he live?" Bollox , I thought this is my fuckin car I told the lads we'd nothin on us and there'd be no reason for them to search thoroughly if were stopped! I was on the back foot with this cunt and he's only in the car a couple of seconds. Better up me game here, as all different scenarios play out in my mind. "What's this stuff like anyway jay" I said hungrily. "Top of the range bro, he's talkin mad money on this so I'm just picking up a Party pack off him, we're heading back your way aren't we? Iv to go back to a gaff in Coolock after town Ye" he says as his head turns out the window looking over at the poolbeg towers. "Pull in here. Two seconds bro". Says Jay. He gets out of the car looking at his phone skips down the driveway the door opens and he disappears into the gaff. Squeak comes back from the dead. " How does he know what our suss is for after this" splurts Squeak, and he was right. How did he know. My mind was racing but focused on my breathing like always, as I let my mind go blank and re think the situation. " why are we only gettin 5grand for this anyway, I'll get sacked from Accenture if this goes wrong", " I want 1,500 put me at ease here youll still earn more and get the car back on the insurance" squeak says as I tap the steering wheel and zone out of my breath and whip around. "I'll give yous the one five for fuck sake I need yous to stick to what we've planned", " squeak you don't say a word there'll be eyebrows raised hearing your big Ivor head on you" "your hear for me Ye don't talk to anyone while we're with this cunt Ye? Act cool but look paranoid alright? That's all brother" I said. Jesus fucking tonight I'm thinking sitting there tapping on the wheel of the car, but I was expecting one of them to bring up the pay rate at some point. Jay comes back out as the door slams behind him. He slips back into the passenger side, and points out of the estate. "Let's move " he says. "We need to drop into me mate he has his own garage just off d strand road I'm picking up a few parts off him before we spin out to Clondalkin Ye " he says confidently . "Here what's going on, Your working off a different blue print to me pal, 2 stop offs and Ye pick up Hoover now we're going to your mates garage I was supposed to leave your gaf without Ye, and give us a look at that Hoover will Ye " I was letting this prick know he's not jumping in here and thinking he's the pilot some little yoke from ringsend hearing a posh twang off my accent goin on like Nidgey because he left school before 3rd year and once done a 4 year stint in mountjoy for aggravated burglary . This fella thinks im in awe of him... Ha! Well here we fuckin go. Trust Dennis to stitch me up with this fuckin ejit! He sure knows how to pick them out. So Jay then dips into the inside pocket of his bomber jacket and pulls out about a quarter of white lightening and throws a coin of it into my face. " get that into Ye kid" he says as I Hoover up what was on the €2 coin. I took a minute before saying a thing after that blaster and listened to him carefully. He was confident which was good and he felt like he was in control which was even better. I needed this cunt relaxed pulling into his brother Johnny's garage for things to swing our way. The stupid cunt doesn't have a clue I know about his brother because of my accent he makes the assumption I'd know no one he knows, that I'm bait that's been roped in to drive us in n outta clondalkin after being smooth talked naively by Dennis over a debt or some shit. Jays brother was into some proper shit. His number was about €30,000 which to me was a terrible lot of money at the age of 24 getting €188 doing an ECDL course in fás in Baldoyle. Realistically he's worth more than 30 grand taking into account his garage and whatever assets he had at the time. No we're talking €30,000 in cash he had coming into his wash shop just off d north strand. He used it as a collection spot for the boys gathering paper for him. I clocked Jay one Friday heading down the garage after we sussed out someone small time from fairview who got stuff off him. The boys in the back seat hadn't a notion what was really happening here, the undercurrents of this physical language is there for only some to translate. Jay got into a bit of friendly debt with Dennis that was just over 3 grand. Jay though being the cocky wanker he is thinks he sits on a golden chair with his brother being Johnny Duffy. Dennis had been growing his business for a while but was looking to advance territorially to make a name for himself. I never travelled that line of thinking and considered myself an opportunist but I k ew what Dennis wanted and he liked the solution I had. Before we pulled in at the garage I pointed out to mick that the back wheel on squeaks side seemed flat. "Well have a look at it in the garage for ye Al don't worry, you'll get this car home not a scratch on it" says Jay as he scoops another coin outta his quarter. "Lovely " I say as I turn the car down by the river bank at the north strand. "Where's this place jay" I said exhaustedly. "Down the end to the left you'll see it I told me mate were droppin in" Jay said as his leg starts bouncing up and down. We turn the corner and I see an old dilapidated warehouse turned into an open plan garage with a n office right at the entrance of the shutters an upstairs walkway looking down into the garage floor and a car half disassembled towards the back of the floor with a pair of legs sticking out from underneath. I pull up and nick off d engine Jay jumps out. As do me and the two lads. "Dennis what's the story pal" he says as Dennis slides out from underneath the car. " Jay Ye pox" goes Dennis with a grin from ear to ear. "Is there a jax here " I say to Dennis treating him like jays mate the chap that just works here. I click mick lookin at the back wheel just as I head in for a piss. I hear laughter from outside and hear Mick laughing nervously which in a way put me at ease, I could tell Jay was starting to get hostile thinking he was frightening to us thinking he lived a life we had no clue about. I breezed outta the jax and ask the lads what score was the Liverpool match as I make my over to kick the back wheel of my Mas 04 focus and give the wheel a kick. " Liverpool aren't playing till Sunday pal haha" says Jay bullishly. " I'm just checking to see if there's a puncture " I say leaning in to look at the outside tyre. Suddenly a hand on my shoulder and it's Mick. "He's planning on smashing you up with a wheel brace and stroking your mas car" whispers Mick , as he steps back around toward the Driver door to Where Jay and Kev where standing with as Jay slips an iron bar up his sleeve. Kev was in on it. Dennis slipped back under his car, Mick stared blankly in fear at Jay. Me ? I let the air outta the tyre earlier anticipating Jay was in debt, he thought he'd do Dennis a favour and spin out to clondalkin with us to tidy up his bill. Jay was a pawn. He got me inside that garage his brothers collection point. It was the last Friday of the month. It was the last drop before the garage closed up the other boys had gone home leaving Dennis and Kev to lock up. Kev planted the idea of a car jacking in jays head weeks ago and confessed to him he'd do it with me after the lads at duffys garage told him a bit about me. It was the heist of the century I thought handy money I said at the time little did I know this stunt would change my life forever and push me over the line of which you don't come back from. I leaned down behind the car wheel and un strapped the 9mm Smith n Wesson handgun I placed there earlier that day. The job of the century on Johnny Duffy and his own brother was about to tell us where his cash drop was ruling Kev and Dennis out of his scope completely. Beside the river on the strand, a damp breeze blew in at us and just as I picked myself up from the ground with the handgun covered by the angle of my sleeve I took a breath before my life changed forever, thought about nature and concentrated on that damp air blowing in. One last thought before I whip around. How evening stole the light and how cold was the fuckin ground.