text: “Let me put it in terms that even you, with your exiguous human capacity for only the most basic comprehension, may understand. Consider for a moment a scenario something like this: at some point in the dark, dim and distant past, some sick-slob of a cosmic entity has a flash of inspiration for conjuring up a bit of distraction. Picture a pasty-skinned, grossly overweight, greasy-haired slacker-type who looks like he hasn’t bathed or changed his food-stained T-shirt for months and smells so rank his dog steers clear of him... a degenerate knuckle-dragging exemplification of utter moral atrophy who, to the misfortune of anything under its dominion, possess a certain degree of... omnipotence. Someone you know perhaps? Minus the omnipotence of course. Somewhere out in the space/time continuum of the infinite cosmos this error of empyrean evolution eventually gets bored with its meaningless existence, having run through it's vast collection of quantum-computer games so many times, it can now play any of them in it’s substance-assisted sleep and win every single time. In a rare blink of brilliance, it decides to write a little program for some diversion... for a bit of mindless amusement... something that will perhaps stem the recurring flood of it's ennui for a while. It codes-up a sweet little star system out in the back forty of what you humans refer to as the Milky Way, close to the outer edge of that superlative spiral galactic array. It conjures a modest but slick solar configuration, with a lovely little yellow sun and nine companion satellites... including a beautiful ball just bursting with promise and potential which circles well within the yellow power-plant's habitable zone. It gives this third stone from the sun an interior dynamo core of liquid iron to generate a magnetic field which acts to deflect the searing radiation generated by that happy star. Wouldn't want it to be toasted to barren cinder after all. It then covers two thirds of that planet in deep, vast oceans teeming with life and oxygen-producing phytoplankton... shapes the land-masses into majestic towering mountains and lush fecund valleys, interminable grass-covered prairies and savannas, along with prodigious forests, awe-inspiring canyon panoramas and gently rolling verdant hills... next it fills the whole planet with a fantastic potpourri of plant life and a multitude of creatures, virtually uncountable in number and diversity and all living in perfect harmony within a totally self-sustaining system... Paradise incarnate!!! That annotated book of fairy tales you creatures call "The Bible" refers to it as The Garden of Eden. Ring any bells for you? And then that execrable empyrean entity, being the unhinged sick-slob that it is, figures to make things just a little more interesting by adding a jolt of adrenaline to the whole equation. It gives half the animals on the planet a taste for fresh blood and still warm and quivering fear-infused flesh, programming that half to stalk, kill and eat whatever it can catch of the other half, which now desperately clings to it's miserable nightmare existence, waiting for Death to claim it's bounty at any moment... and Shazam! Just like that, paradise turns into a pitiless and terrifying place for the hunted... their short brutish lives become one of frenzied and perpetual heart-pounding panic, more often than not punctuated by a horrific and grisly end... really not a pretty picture is it? Sure fun to watch all the action though! But as one easily bored, this deranged bad joke of a being cranks-up the entertainment factor a notch and introduces yet another life-form... a woefully confused biped with a large brain mischievously constrained by a tiny intelligence and most importantly, a sequence in its DNA making and forever keeping it violent, blood thirsty, forever fearful but best of all, totally and utterly insane. And then this fatuous, fiendish Creator of Cosmic Chaos leans back in its well-worn food-stained recliner, reaches for a fistful of Extraterrestrial Twinkies and cracks another can of an ethereal energy drink. With a stream of drool slowly working its way down its chubby unshaven chin, it watches gleefully with a dolt-like smirk as those naked, psychotic apes really screw-up that beautiful little blue-green ball circling the happy sun... over and over and over again... in an infinitely repeating loop! Sleep well little human.