text: From Newspedia the only mildly expensive encyclopedia **The recent history of professional competition** In the year 2068, the stock market was heating up. The top two competitors were the continent-country of Chinassia and the Corporate States of AmericaTM\*(a subsidiary of AmazonTM)\*. Each one's stock market control of the world markets was deadlocked with the other, knowing economic control of the whole world laid in the balance. On the one end, the world could fall into the grasp of Chinassia and their policy of "Kill everyone who doesn't give you there stuff, including themselves; because Chinassia is the best." and on the other side, the Corporate States of AmericaTM(*a subsidiary of AmazonTM)*'s policy of "Slowly kill everyone who doesn't buy all your stuff and then work them to death; because the Corporate States of AmericaTM(*a subsidiary of AmazonTM)*'s 'capitalism never holds a gun to your head'... *(it prefers to poison you slowly and watch die as you suffer in slowly increasing ennui.)*" As such, the world laid in the balance, in baited breath to see how the rest of the world would die or be enslaved. And in this world, the next Olympics approached. People at large viewed the Olympics as a pleasant distraction from the impended eternal servitude to one of the world's two great super-powers. However, those who were educated knew that the Olympics were the worst thing in this scenario and pushed for the Olympics to be canceled, but their pleas were never heard. (They were passed off as those silly people who read independent research papers instead of watching Chinassia-owned or Corporate States of AmericaTM(*a subsidiary of AmazonTM)*'s propaganda/advertising agencies such as NEWS incorporated or FOXTM: Parody News \[rebranded after their status as a news station was revoked for failing to report on any news in 68 years.\]). Often, stocks markets could shift by up to 3% based on what country won the Olympics. As such, both Chinassia and the Corporate States of America*TM*(*a subsidiary of AmazonTM)* both did their best to secure a win. And both did what made the most sense... reach out to a third party to and pay them to do it for them. Both Chinassia and the Corporate States of AmericaTM(*a subsidiary of AmazonTM)* reached out, in secret, to Biomen inc., a startup that had excelled in its field since 2061 that was constantly making the news. The Olympics banned any kind of performance-enhancing drug, and as such, Chinassia and the Corporate States of AmericaTM(*a subsidiary of AmazonTM)* both looked for a workaround, and found it: Constructing the perfect athlete from scratch. Each one reached out with the same contract, "Build us an athlete that will win every every compitition in the Olympics." As such, Biomen inc., if it hadn't been greedy, would have just chosen one and left it at that. However, when has a corporation ever not been greedy? The CEO of Biomen came up with a "brilliant" plan that the shareholders both approved. They would make two perfectly synchronized UltimateTM Athletes who would tie for first on every single event. And so, Biomen grew two identical twins, linked by subconscious flags, in-skin sensitive photoreceptors to be in perfect unison. Their shared cerebral cortexes pre-programmed to love the olympics more than anything. Each had six foot long legs and arms of rippling muscle, and no real torso or head to speak of. They were there, but so small as to require close-ups to see. Each of the 'two' Olympians, Phlegm and Phlagm as their designers has secretly named them, had to be kept on life support between matches. At the end of the Olympics, both collapsed on the makeshift dual-first-place stand with the third place top gold Medalist, a trans man named Tamisha from Uganda looking on in horror as they died next to him. In a later interview, he said, with a shiver, that they died with smiles on their faces. Biomen, as a result, succeeded both its contracts and the shareholders raked in and cashed out their stocks. 3 of the shareholders added 18% to their net wealth that day. Biomen was declared a scandel by the 'news' stations of the two great superpowers as both lost stock strength to Ugunda despite their respective 'victory'. The CEO of Biomen escaped to Cancun, the world's first 10-trillionare where he was shot in the middle of the night by Tamisha. As the two great superpowers began to collapse, and the Olympics closed its doors forever in shame after losing all of its ad revenue (people had stopped watching about half-way through, the constant wins by Phlegm and Phlagm had left the competitions boring and almost noone had bothered watching after the first three events. In fact, the only person who watched it all the way through was Tamisha's mother. This contributed to the collapse of the world, because as the sole person watching many events that were highly anticipated to have huge turn out, her opinions completely skewed advertising algorithms in the direction of knitting and water polo, from which AI advertising companies never recovered.) Despite the setback, Biomen survived. In fact, for sports businesses wanting to win sports (such as the Quebec Yankees, the Seattle Dodgers, or the St. Louis Nicklebacks), it was clearly demonstrated Biomen was necessary to win. Each team had a perfect season with top advertising contracts and payouts followed by collapse of the sport. It is said that competitive sports ended for good in 2073, although some illegal games of pre-school tag randomly occur to this day for full minutes on end before the children involved are immediately monetized by corporate income-seeking drones, speed-enhanced, shown on international media, and are betted on. However, they only manage to move mere millions of dollars before the childrens' hearts give out and they die of cardiac arrest. \[Note: Like most felonies, ownership of any video recording of these illegal sports events are punishable by life imprisonment in most countries unless you make over 195k a year and have purchased an internationally recognized law insurance.\] With the effective end of physical sports, the world turned to Chess. Capitalizing on the new income stream, advertisers went to work. Money was invested in the best super computers. Eventually a computer by the name of *Super BlueTM* created 'The Optimum Path'. The Optimum Path was a series of chess moves, some very strange moves (although later analysis would reveal they existed to prevent countermeasures). The result was anyone who memorized The Optimum Path had about an 85% of winning a Chess match. (When two players who both had memorized The Optimum Path played against eachother, it often became a 50/50 split of who would win, largely dependent on who was the was assigned the white chess peices.) Advertisers loved it. With the game being considered perfected, and a 50/50 split remaining yet always coming out with a clear victor, it wasn't anywhere in risk of falling like the Olympics had. And even better, you could never guarantee who would win. It was a perfect statistics situation that anyone with the algorithms could predict but still liked like skill and talent to outside viewers. Chess was, as a result, heralded as the world's #1 competitive event. Casual Chess became too daunting for amateaurs, and professional chess players became some of the most highly-sought competitors in the world. Traditional chess classes and matches all but disappeared as successful ones focused on two things, and two things only: Memorizing the convoluted Optimum Path and how to attract sponsors. Soon, every chess player in the professional bracket was taught exclusively The Optimum Path. All but one. Sam Tender, a small old agendered from France born in 2015. By this point in 2095, this made them 80 years old. Most of the competitors in Chess were young, beautiful, and well suited as advertising material. The story goes that Sam was taught Chess by their grandmother, on the other side of a plastic sheet, as Sam stayed by her side in the nursing home throughout the pandemic of 2020. Sam never learned the Optimum path, and refused to. When asked why Sam didn't bother, they simply replied, "It doesn't seem fun." Sam was mocked across all of the industry with their measly 25% win rate. However, there was something about Sam's victories. Sam was threatened to leave the league twice, told their 'low win rate was an embarrassment to the competition'. But Sam didn't care. Sam didn't have an advertisers to pull out, and they paid the entrance fee out of their own pocket. The first time Sam refused to leave spread like fire by word of mouth. The second time, news stations eager to make a quick buck pushed out a story attempting to make them a laughing stock. It backfired. Although some people jumped on the engineered bandwagon to mock them, Sam received plenty of heartfelt letters urging Sam to continue. And people began to watch Sam's matches. Sam would make moves that analysts would later prove did neither person any harm or any good. When asked why he did them, Sam only responded, "The game wouldn't be as fun if was over too quick." There were times when Sam would move peieces in ways that seemed that the intent was only for them to be captured. When asked why they did this, Sam would respond, "My opponent was struggling. I wanted them to enjoy the game, too." In just a few short years, the legend of Sam was known across all of the Chess community. It became a badge of honor to play a game that eschewed the Optimum Path, and to play a game with Sam, "By the seat of your pants". Same loved this for awhile. And, as Sam's legend grew, so did Sam's viewership (and advertisers who wanted in on Sam's slots). As Sam refused all advertisers, they could only spend money on Sam's competitors. And the best selling slots were on games Sam won. Soon, competitors bragged about losing to Sam and advertisers quickly hopped on this, and for a month, "Will-Lose-to-Sam" became the highest paying trait of any Chess player. In that month, Sam quickly shot up to the top of the brackets. The professionals competed for for advertising dollars which translated into 'fastest loss to Sam', and in a day, Sam shot up to the #2 slot as six competitors conceded the moment they sat down. In the middle of the final match, the #1 competitor, "Three Fish" Yang from Korea looked across from him. He knew losing to Sam would secure him advertising dollars. However, maintaining #1 spot was also valuable for other ad revenue. And so "Three Fish" began his opening move: the opening move for the Optimum Path. Recognizing what Yang was doing, Sam scooped up their chess pieces. Yang stared in horror; Sam had never conceded a match before. Yang looked at them in shock, "What... what are you doing?" Sam shrugged, "It's not fun anymore." Sam quietly conceded to the judge as the world looked on in silence as Sam walked out of view of the camera for the last time in his life.