text: Should I get revenge? Should I calm my angry body with such a thing? Do I need it? What would an intelligent person do right now? I am struggling, badly. My head aches and so does my neck. What comes next? Do I stab back after being stabbed? Or do I let her win and relinquish my knife. She has no idea what she's put me through does she? Watching them together, time after time, why would she do that to me? How could she do that to me? I don't know, but I wish to know. Maybe I should stab her back just so she knows what it feels like. Maybe then she would feel my pain, rather than playing the victim like every woman does. Maybe it's the misogynist in me, but how often do women try and get empathy off men? Every day, every sentence, every second? Maybe I'm cold hearted or maybe I'm detaching with care. I'm just saying it how I see it, and exaggerating a little. I'm so tempted to stab her back, just so she can feel my pain. So she can know what it's been like to be me. How close I've been to suicide. How close I've been to slitting my own throat. But I won't stab her back. I'm not sure why, at all really, but I won't. I'll stay strong for a few more days.