text: ‘Now this is the kind of place I want’ she said to herself eyeing the modern two story house like a green eyed monster. ‘Look at the finish on it - it’s perfect. I love the shutters on the front windows. The immaculate garden with those large ornate pots on the wide veranda - just to die for! I could sit here all day’. Then she looked at her watch and realised that she couldn’t sit here for a minute longer or she would be late back to work, and an important meeting. “Where did you go to eat your lunch?” Jessie was asked by her friend - one of the directors of the company. Fiona was such a down to earth woman and acted no differently towards executives or juniors. “Oh I just drove through the new estate looking at the houses and drooling”. “They are well out of your reach, you know that don’t you?’ Fiona reminded her. “Not necessarily. Remember that movie the other night, what was it called? Oh yes, ‘The Salesman’, well that woman in it thought lots of things were out of her reach but it didn’t stop her, did it?” “No it didn’t but she wasn’t happy and I didn’t like that movie anyway”. Fiona had been Jessie’s friend for a long time and knew everything about her, including the fact that with her, the grass was always greener on the other side, but she had found out a few times that it isn’t always. “Hello I’m home” she called to her partner Ben when she had shut the front door behind her. “How was your day? “He asked giving her a hug from behind. “Yeah good, long but alright” she replied “I went looking at the new estate in my lunch break. You know all those lovely houses” she told him turning around to face him and thinking how short he seemed when she had high heels on. She hadn’t really noticed before so maybe it was the new shoes she was wearing. “And?” he asked, already knowing what she would say, and that this perhaps was the start of another ‘discussion’ about where they lived. “Oh I don’t know Ben but it’s just that I’m sick of living in a tiny flat. You said we would only be here for a couple of years and it’s already nearly three” she said twiddling his hair as the ‘touchy feely’ approach would get a positive response from him. “We’ve been through this Jessie. If I hadn’t of been injured in that car accident and unable to work for so long we wouldn’t have eaten into our savings but we did. There’s nothing we can do about it in the short term. And before realising he shouldn’t have said it, out of his mouth came “and if you didn’t actually spend so much of your wages it would be helpful”! She dropped her hand off of his head straight away; angry at what he just said and letting her annoyance get the better of her yelled “Well other people can live in lovely homes, have nice cars and actually enjoy their lives, but not us. The house needs painting, we’ve still only got one bathroom, and my car is well passed its use date! What if I do spend my money? I care what I look like, unlike some! Well I’ve had enough. I’m going out”. With that she grabbed her bag and headed into town. “I’m going to the movies” she told herself as she was driving. It was another modern love story. She’d only just seen one like this at the weekend and loved it. Jessie even loved the ads that came on before the movie! When Ben ever came to the movies with her he was always disgruntled at how much advertising they had to ‘put up with’ before the film and he usually went through his phone while they were on. ‘Oh look at the outfit she has on...how gorgeous’ played over in Jessie’s mind each time a new outfit appeared on the screen. I wonder if I can get that anywhere.’ The loved up couple of the big screen seemed to have a never ending supply of money. They left their state of the art home to go out to dinner at ‘The Gentry” a five star restaurant where the tanned, beautiful staff served scallops with spring salad followed by native lobster, and all the while the stars of the movie talked about their next holiday which by the way they would be jetting away to in a friends private jet. And while eating a chocolate mousse and sipping a dessert wine laughed at the antics they got up to on the tennis court earlier. ‘Oh he is so handsome and so much taller than she is’ thought Jessie remembering how short Ben seemed today. ‘And he’s so in love with her. Imagine receiving a diamond bracelet and matching earrings for your birthday’ she sighed remembering the heat pack, sports socks and movie tickets she got for hers. When Jessie got home after the movies Ben was sitting in the lounge listening to music but as soon as she walked in he stood up and went over to give her a hug. “Let’s not argue honey, it’s not worth it. We’ll have enough money to move somewhere else one day, I promise” and he kissed her on the cheek. “Yeah I suppose so” she acquiesced while thinking “But not to buy the kind of house I want to live in”. Every time Jessica went off to the movies it seemed to pique her desire to have something better in life. She had been brought up in a humble family - mum and dad and four kids. Her parents were quite content with nine to five jobs for both of them, a holiday each year camping in the forest and meat and three veg. for most dinners. Jessie was happy with her life too while growing up, but not now. When Ben came home one evening from work informing an already irritated Jessie that he had taken an extra job to help with the savings, instead of showing him that she appreciated the extra work he would be doing, she was annoyed. “You’ll be doing what? Packing shelves at night? Is that the best you can do?” she asked in her ‘whatever next?’ voice. “What does it matter what I’m doing as long as it’s bringing in the money?” Ben asked her, once again disappointed at what she thought was important. “Well someone might see you?” “The store is closed at that time of night, and so what if someone sees me?” “Actually Jessie I’ve been meaning to ask you about all the money that comes out of the account each fortnight - you just take it out so I’m not sure what it’s for?” “I knew you wouldn’t notice but I’ve been having botox around my eyes for a while now and my teeth have been whitened AND in case you’re interested I’ve been putting money away in a different account to have a tummy tuck!” “What?” said Ben asked hardly believing what he was hearing? What do you want Botox for? You’re twenty seven years of age, not fifty seven and you’re beautiful as you are. You had lovely teeth anyway and what tummy?” “Oh you wouldn’t understand. You don’t care what you look like do you?’ “I care but I don’t need to look perfect. That’s not the real world”. She didn’t care what Ben thought. Jessie knew he wouldn’t approve of any of it. “Of course he wouldn’t be happy when he found out” Fiona told Jessie the next morning in the office. “Ben’s was out of work, and in pain for ages and not through any fault of his own, and here you are squandering the money. No wonder he yelled at you”. “Oh well he won’t stop me from enhancing my looks, if he doesn’t like it too bad!” “Do you want to come and see the new movie out with ‘what’s his name’ in it...that gorgeous guy who was in ‘love has no bounds’? I think he’s just amazing with those bright blue eyes of his and being that tall and slim” “Sure. I’m not going anywhere else, so why not” said Fiona secretly thinking that her friend spent too much time at the movies and was beginning to live in a fantasy world. “Where is Ben tonight?” “Oh I’m embarrassed to tell you that he’s stacking shelves at the supermarket - to make a bit more money”. “I tell you Jessie, you have a good guy there. One of these days you’ll realise that all that stuff up on the screen is fake. Those actors are just like us, you and me. They don’t look like that when they get up in the morning - they’d have bad breath, hair all over the place, dribble marks on the pillow from sleeping with their mouth open and if they had slept badly would be rude and miserable. Of course Jessie was taken far away into the land of make believe while watching the movie. “I would love to be able to live the way those two did in that movie. They were always going on holidays and I mean ‘holidays’ and not a weekend away in an air b&b!!” she said to her friend as they sat eating pizza. “You know Jessie; I’m going to have to tell you a few home truths. You know that guy in the movie we saw tonight? Well he’s actually shorter than Ben - all of his scenes in the movie are of him standing on a box or shot at different angles so he looks taller”. “I don’t believe you Fiona. How do you know?” “You know how I lived in America before I came here - I didn’t like to say what my job entailed so I said I was a PA. Well I was a personal assistant, but to Gena Russel, the movie star. And later on when Gena Russel ‘retired’ I got a job with someone else. Have you ever heard of Reanna Jones?” she asked her friend, who by now was really paying attention. “Are you joking? You mixed with all those movie types, really? Oh of course I’ve heard of Reanna - who hasn’t? I love her. She is apparently a lovely person. And she is so beautiful”. “Well let me inform you that she is a horrible, rude, self-indulgent madame. She has been married three times because she chews men up and spits them out! I’m not sure if one part of her body hasn’t been under the knife and, sadly she is an alcoholic. “Well she’s maybe like that, but they all aren’t...are they?” “Well ask me about someone?” Fiona invited, knowing that this would be an eye opener for her friend. “How about the main actor in the movie tonight, the female lead - I’ve read that she is lovely and generous with her money” “Generous with her money...she went through a court case with her siblings because she didn’t think they should have been entitled to anything from their mother’s will, even though they had been her step children since they were four and two years of age. And guess what, she won and they only got a fraction of what she received. Two years ago she was the highest grossing female actor in Hollywood too”. “Oh well let me see” said Jessie trying to think of someone who could be genuine and to prove her point! “Fern Jackson is not a fake, she is totally natural in looks and personality, and I can tell that from all of her movies and the interviews she gives on television. But you would know Fiona”. “Fern Jackson cannot have any more operations on her pert little nose or it will cave in! She has had more boob jobs than anyone else I knew over there and her ‘naturally svelte’ figure is because she exists on no more than a lettuce leaf and thirty cigarettes a day, oh yes and about twenty cups of black coffee!” “Mmmm, are most of them like that Fiona? There must be some real people among them” she almost begged. “Yes of course there are but they are mostly the ones who are short, chubby, wrinkled, and don’t care because they rely on their acting skills. I’m not saying that all the attractive people are fake but a lot are....they count on others to make them look beautiful and to make them sound generous, interested and real. If I hadn’t of worked with them I would still be like you Jessie, sucked in!” “But honestly I was like you before I worked over there - it’s easy to be. We all get taken in by the lies and falseness”. Jessie sat still, trying to absorb what her friend had just said. “But they do live in massive houses and go away on wonderful holidays a lot....that must be true?” “They live in houses that’s for certain, they aren’t ‘homes’ like we have. There’s nothing warm and inviting walking into one of their mansions - they don’t flop on the couch in front of the tv with a dog on their lap...like you do Fiona. And their so called ‘vacations’ are not relaxing, believe me I’ve been on a few. They spend hours getting dressed, make up on, hair done...and once they are out in public view they don’t let their guard down because they are always on show.” “You’re painting a very negative picture Fiona!” Jessie laughed. “Well it’s the truth. Remember when the four of us went on that trip together - we had saved up for such a long time for it, gone somewhere extra nice, and very pricey, we could still relax, wear what we wanted, slouch around, eat whatever and put a few kilos on....but they can’t. There is always someone watching them and they have to put on an act no matter what”. “Oh I couldn’t stand that” said Jessie “I am sorry if I put you off the movies or any of those actors but I had to set you straight!” “Oh I’ll still go to the movies and enjoy them but instead of wanting to be like them, I’ll try and appreciate not being like them, if that makes sense”. “I probably needed it, to be honest. I was getting rather carried away. And just think how happy Ben will be knowing I’m not spending all my money on ‘enhancements’ - in fact I’ll drop in and see him at the supermarket and tell him” “What a great idea” Fiona called out as Jessie got into her car, and one other thing, the actor with the bright blue eyes, they are just coloured contact lenses, and his eyes are really a dull grey colour”. And they both laughed.