text: It’s not that I would have wanted this to happen, it was inevitable anyway. Who did I really think I was? I have a way of pretending I’d never get hurt. How foolish should someone be. It would only take until the middle of our tenth year together and at the infantile stages of autumn. I had to figure it out eventually. You never really found me interesting or worth any time at all. It was just convenient to maintain an illusion. The smoke had to clear at some point. But, God, does it feel so good to finally know. To finally be able to clearly see what you really were. And I knew all along that you were only padding your time. Even knowing, I still let your teeth dig into my heart. You had asked me at some point what my dreams of the future were. You were only parroting the questions I would ask you to avoid the awkward silence. My future was supposed to be with you, or I thought it was at least. A betrayal even the trees could see better than me. A horrible secret you didn’t want anyone to hear or know. I found it all out but not before my time had been wasted. It hurt so deeply that I couldn’t fathom the pain at an appropriate level. Now that I know, I will tell people a lie that is easier to believe, even for myself. You broke your humanity and dragged mine down with it. I will play the victim as I rightly should, but deep down I understand that the aces are in my hand. I will make you pay for the hardship casted onto me but your action and lack thereof. I will dive deep into my river of anguish and pull up with me the leaden casket of my heart. I will cry for others but not for myself. I will wear a disgusting mask made of my own skin to show the world that I was deeply hurt. All of that will not be true at all. I do not feel pain at this point, only anger. I will wear my rotting mask until it can no longer hide my face. For once the tides reside at the highest and you are at the most vulnerable point in your life, I will tear away my mask and eat it. I will wipe the blood over my mouth the same way you did to my ribs. I will defeat your twisted life and take everything from you. With a simple string of words and a well placed breath, I will take you down with me. I do not want to feel better, I want to feel your skin recede against my poisoned dagger of disdain. You aren’t worth the time you took from me, but I will take mine back. I will dig up the fresh soil and lather the mud over my eyes and throat. I am a sad person and I wear a disgusting mask, but one day, the maggots infesting my brain will bear the flies of your downfall. I will consume your happy existence, just as you did mine.