text: The thought of you makes me nervous and excited at the same time. It's like that feeling that you get right before you know something amazing is about to happen. I think about you and I've never even met you, I visualize you and I've never even seen you. In my mind and in my dreams I hold you and I don't even know if you exist. I feel like you're a non obtainable goal, like you may be out there but then again maybe you're not real. Maybe I have put something imaginary onto a pedestal that I can never achieve or maybe you're 10 feet away for me right now. As time goes on I continue to look for you. I question my sanity. I question why I am doing this, why risk it, why risk being destroyed and hurt again. yet I still look. I try to find you in random people. I think maybe that's you or maybe that's you but more and more I am starting to think that you don't exist. So I wont look, wont hope, wont want for what may not exist. This way there wont be a longing for you. Then I can feel safe from what you may bring: happiness, pain, hope, confusion, and an uncertain future. I know you must be beautifully broken, possibly also looking, you should stop too. You aren't looking for me, trust me. Im not good enough and wont ever be. Look if we both stop then no one gets hurt. Then again I'm guessing you cant read this. Simply because you don't exist.