text: “Ariana, please listen to me.” I shoved past her, grabbing the neat pile of shirts from my desk before shoving them in my bag. It was quickly getting full and I eyed the neon suitcase that sat on the top shelf of my closet. My mother was quick to follow my gaze. “Absolutely not,” She said with a strict finality in her tone, stepping in front of the closet to block my access to the suitcase. “The fact that you still think this is happening is insane. So, sit your ass down and start unpacking.” I paused, considering. Clearly, the idea that she would just give up on stopping me from going away was not true. I sat down and watched as relief flooded her features. She clearly thought she had won this battle. “This is not worth it. I know you think you want it. I get it. You’re eighteen and you think you’re an adult now and you think you know what you want. But you don’t. Attending a school in the middle of nowhere is not the great idea you think it is.” Kulu Dyheu University. A private university on a tiny, tropical island in the middle of the Arctic Ocean between Iceland and Norway. A university that I knew logically I had found by complete accident, and yet it seemed like fate. The university had a broad range of majors that appealed to me as well as a beautiful campus. I may not have been there yet, but the pictures that were displayed on the webpage for the school boasted large, gorgeous plants and a close-knit campus to make the journeys between classes easy. I had applied immediately and despite the huge scholarship I received, Mom remained unconvinced. She begged me to stay in state. Told me that Minnesota had many wonderful institutions to attend. I remained uninterested, however. Even as other acceptance letters flooded my mailbox, nothing grabbed my attention or excited me like my acceptance letter to Kulu Dyheu University. So, I submitted my fee to the university and made the official decision to attend there. Did my mother know that? No. Not at the time. But now she did know, and she was not handling it well. “This is where I want to go. It’s a great school. And I can call you everyday. I’ll be fine.” Perhaps, an appeal to the technology of today would sway her. Her frown deepened. “You are not going to school there.” She walked out of my room, casting one last glare at my half-packed bag. I thought that this would pass. That she would grow used to the idea of me leaving. Weeks of summer flew by and the start of a new school year dawned. But as I brought up my need for a passport and buying clothes for the warm island I would be staying, she brushed my words aside. I realized, with a start, that she truly meant what she had said at the beginning of my summer. She had no intention of letting me go there. This was going to be harder than I thought. But I was nothing if not resilient, so I got myself a passport to start. This, although a scary experience, was not difficult to do. I had all my forms prepared and various pieces of identification to prove I was who I said I was. After six weeks, I received my passport, shiny and new, with the smell of freedom. It was so strong it intoxicated me. My bags remained mostly packed for a month. And when the time to leave grew near, I finished packing, placing my toothbrush and deodorant in last. Everything was in place. The house was silent as the clock ticked towards midnight. Adam, my best friend and apparently my getaway driver, was on his way. I was nearly bouncing on my bed from the excitement of it all. My phone lit up with a text from Adam announcing his presence in my driveway. I glanced out the window and could see the headlights from his car facing the garage door. Shouldering my many bags, I slid into the hallway, doing my best to avoid the creaky floorboards. Before creeping down the stairs, I paused outside the pink painted door. Gently, I pushed it open and peered inside. My sister lay curled atop her covers, hand still wrapped around her phone. I muttered a goodbye she would never hear. After exiting the front door, I made as fast of a dash as I could with many bags. I shoved them into the back seat, before sliding into the passenger seat and grinning at Adam. He rolled his eyes and he backed out of the driveway. The airport we were driving to was a few hours away. I insisted on choosing the one that was not the closest to my house, in case anything went wrong. “They’ll check the closest airport, if they realize I left,” I had explained to Adam over a bowl of mint ice cream. “So, we’ll go to some random one a few cities away.” Blasting music to keep the both of us awake, Adam’s hands were glued tightly to the steering wheel. His nerves about this whole operation were unrelenting, and I could practically see him working himself into a panic attack. “It’s going to be fine,” I reminded him, carefully placing one of my hands over one of his. His eyes never left the road, but he did appear to release a breath neither of us had realized he had been holding. “Easy for you to say. You’re not the one being left behind to clean up your mess,” he retorted after a minute. I gave an apologizing smile, and he rolled his eyes. I knew I was forgiven. “But seriously, is it worth it? Ditching your mom and sister, leaving in the middle of the night, going behind everyone’s back, facing the unknown, all for a college? Is it really worth it?” My eyes fixated on the exit sign for the airport. One mile. “It is. It’s what I want. Don’t I deserve to do what I want to do? To go where I want to go?” “Of course,” he said, hurriedly. “I just wish where you wanted to go wasn’t so far away.” “I’ll come back. For Christmas and things like that.” “It won’t be the same.” Adam was attending an in-state school for elementary education. I was going thousands of miles away to study aerospace engineering, graphic design, and gender studies. To say, we would be leading different lives was the understatement of the century. He pulled into the airport, parking close to the entrance. As we both unbuckled, Adam reached for the cooler of homemade sandwiches. Feasting on peanut butter and jellies, chips, and capri suns, we were once again reminded of the fast coming future. We were no longer children. As excited as I was, fear gripped me for the first time as I fully realized what I was doing. Moving so far away that I could never just drive home for the weekend, or have my mom come visit if I needed her. Adam squeezed my hand, sensing my anxieties. “You’re going to be amazing.” “You sure?” “Absolutely.” I had never been on a plane before. They were bumpy and crowded and smelly, and yet I could not stop myself from smiling. This was my beginning. The plane landed in Iceland, which was surprisingly green to me. I suddenly felt very silly in my coat and jeans as a slight gust of wind provided me and my fellow passengers with a breath of relief from the humidity. I stayed the night in a hotel, flopping on the creaking bed with exhaustion. My many bags lay abandoned by the door and for the first time since leaving, I checked my phone. I had thirty missed phone calls from my mom and over 100 messages. Adam had sent me five texts, asking me if I was okay and then telling me that my mom was freaking out. Finally, Annie, my little sister, had texted me. Unlike the upset tone to my mom’s messages or the concerned tone of Adam’s, Annie’s were curious. I took a moment of consideration, before sending her a message informing her that I was okay. Then, I let the exhaustion overtake me. I was up bright and early the following morning to board the boat. My bags overwhelmed me as I stumbled toward the dock from the taxi, yet no one moved to help me. I managed to make it onto the boat, handing the crumpled ticket to the person who appeared to be in charge. He looked at it in distaste before letting me board. The tiny boat was small and shaky. I threw up four times. My head pounded the entire time and I nearly regretted it all, as I buried my head in between my knees, begging for the headache to loosen the terrible grip it had on me. But, this was still what I wanted. My classes, the new friends I would make, living on a tropical island away from my family- it was everything I was excited about. After quite a few hours, we docked on the island. I had just barely stepped out onto the deck when the boat and its crew took off away from the island. I began walking on a dirt road. I passed by a café and waved at two girls who sat outside, side by side, eating ice cream. Soon enough, the large sign of Kulu Dyheu University came into view, brightly colored and intricately designed. A smile took over my face. Finally.