text: It generally takes me about 20 minutes to find a cafe or restaurant to dine in. I start with Google recommendations, searching for the general term ‘restaurants near me’ before my sparking tastebuds narrow it down to the flavour I desire at the time. The images of Indian dishes make my mouth water, especially when I think about warm garlic naan covered in melted butter, then a photo of pulled pork tacos with super fresh slaw from a popular Mexican restaurant draws my attention. But most of the time, it’s Asian cuisine that makes my stomach gurgle in approval; Vietnamese my preference at lunchtime, Japanese an evening favouite. If a restaurant doesn’t feature images of their plated offerings, they don’t even get a look in. If the plates aren’t presented well or nicely garnished, I will scroll on by. Presentation is everything when it comes to promoting your business online, I should know, I judge businesses for a living, as a marketing consultant. To see the shortfalls in a business in order to improve it, you need to inspect it with a critical eye, from first impression to sale. In order to then promote the business effectively, you need to inspect your market and yes, you need to be judgmental; age, income, and gender all come into it. Then, of course, this behaviour carries over into your everyday life. Sometimes it’s a good thing, but it can make you look at the world with cloud-tinted glasses. The other consideration when browsing search results is customer reviews. Of course, this is an absolute given. I can pick a disgruntled customer a mile away, so I’ll scroll past those, disinterested in their rant. I also avoid reviews with poor spelling and grammar, reviews that spell the business name wrong, and outright abusive reviews to the business. Once they’re weeded out, I can then get on to the real reviews and base my personal ranking on those, plus the visual presentation of the business. So you would think that when I walked into the lowest rated restaurant in the city I was visiting, I must have forgotten my phone, it surely can’t have been on purpose. On the outside, the restaurant looked welcoming. It was quiet, but post-Covid most businesses were struggling so that came as no surprise. The front window was clean with very little advertising, and a simple red stenciled sign that read ‘Fusion Delights’. I’d come across it after the meeting when I was walking back to the hotel. It was the first restaurant I’d seen that was open at 11 am, and while it was early, I wanted something substantial having skipped breakfast to get to my appointment on time. Fusion Delights had a familiar ring to it and I immediately thought that the menu would have an Asian influence, but when I picked up a menu from the display stand on the way in, I saw it was a fusion... of various cultures signature dishes. Crumbed Calamari Rings with Satay Sauce Pulled Beef Sliders with Hollandaise Slaw Butter Chicken with Pesto Naan Teriyaki Chicken with Bulgur Pilaf In a way, they all seemed strangely appetizing but the thing that really caught my eye was the price. Not one main dish was over $15. This made me doubt the quality a little, but hunger led the way and I went ahead and approached the counter to order. The counter was clean and the Raspberry and Dark Chocolate Muffins on display were large and looked fresh with just the right amount of chocolate chunks, I almost ordered one but figured if I were still hungry after my super cheap main, I might just get one to take back to the hotel. A coffee machine sat to the right of the counter, and although I’d been cutting back on caffeine, I decided I’d order one to give me a boost to get through the rest of the day. When ordering coffee at a new establishment, I would select a Mochaccino. I figured the addition of chocolate would mask any substandard coffee-making skills, I couldn’t bear being disappointed by burned milk, or coarsely ground beans. When the server came out of the kitchen to greet me, I thought she looked tentative, even a little scared. She smiled and was polite, but looked at me from under heavy quizzical eyebrows and with a slightly shaky voice she said, “Good morning, how may I help you?” So far so good: a clean restaurant, a quirky menu, tasty looking muffins and a lovely server. “Hello, this is a lovely looking restaurant,” I started by saying, while gesturing around the clean white walls and tasteful simple red and black stenciled artwork. “Oh really?” She said, raising her face to look at me directly. “I mean, thank you so much.” “Yes, it really is, and I’m excited to try some food from your menu.” “Great!” She replied, now seeming a bit more lively and comfortable with me. “What can I get you?” I decided on the spur of the moment to go for gold, and ordered a Latte, I felt like she was a person I could trust to treat the beans gently. “I’ll also get the Teriyaki Chicken with Bulgur Pilaf, please.” “Sure, that’ll be $17.50 please? But I’m sorry, your coffee will take 10 minutes or so, I haven’t started the machine yet.” “No problem,” I said with a smile. I had a feeling the wait would be worth it. I returned to my table and within one minute, a fresh bottle of water was placed in front of me with a small plate of Cabbage and Wasabi Mayo. Fantastic. The Latte arrived at my table within the promised 10 minutes. It was served in a glass, the froth was thin and tight, and there was a perfectly formed silver fern pattern on the top, representing our country, New Zealand. I waited until she had left before I put the cup to my lips and took a sip... of the best coffees I had ever tasted; smooth, creamy, strong enough but not to the point of bitterness, and an ever so subtle caramel finish. “Is your coffee okay?” The coffee was so enjoyable that I hadn’t even noticed the server return to my table holding a beautifully presented Teriyaki Chicken and Bulgar Pilaf plate with fresh slaw on the side. “Oh yes, it’s gorgeous, thank you so much.” She put the plate in front of me with chopsticks and a fork, and I saw her nametag read ‘Bethany’. She was startled when I thanked her again by using her name. Then smiled shyly as she remembered she was wearing her nametag. “You’re welcome. Enjoy, and let me know if there’s anything else you need.” The chicken was the first thing I tried. It was tender and the sauce was so rich and tasty, I could tell it was homemade. The bulgur was next. I was somewhat of a bulgur connoisseur as it was one of the first dishes I’d ever made. Cracked bulgur wheat is cheap to buy, and with simple ingredients including tomatoes, stock, onions, and oil, it was very easy to make. But to get the taste just right? That was another thing. The first mouthful of bulgur was warm and comforting. It wasn’t too flavoursome and while tomato isn’t normally something I’d have with teriyaki anything, it complimented the chicken perfectly and I had to stop myself from audibly moaning with foodie pleasure. The slaw was as fresh as it looked, light, and with just the right amount of mayo so as to refresh the palette. My Japanese Turkish fusion meal went down a treat; every mouthful with the right mix of flavours. I washed it down with the cool filtered water and sat back, satisfied with the size of the meal, and impressed with the quality. Bethany had peaked at me a few times during my meal, clearly trying to figure out whether I was enjoying it or not, and noticing I had finished, she came over to clear my table. “How did you enjoy your meal?” “With every ounce of my being,” I replied. And she beamed. I added, “could you point me to the bathroom, please?” You can always tell a good food establishment by the condition of its bathroom, and Fusion Delights did not let me down. The benchtop was sparkly clean, the toilet equally so. Ample toilet paper was available, displayed in a wall cabinet with a glass door, and foaming soap was available at the sink for handwashing. There were hand towels, and a hand dryer available to suit both preferences, and the feature wall displayed a print of various famous landmarks from around the world: the Taj Mahal, Great Wall of China, Statue of Liberty, and the Colosseum - another addition to the ‘fusion’ theme. When I returned to my table, my used plate was gone, and in its place was a small bowl with a few M&Ms surrounding a Starlight Mint - very cool. I popped the M&Ms in my mouth and the mint in my pocket for later. Having paid when I ordered, I could have just walked out, but Bethany watched me curiously as I walked back to the counter. “Bethany, can you call the owner of this restaurant for me, please?” Her cheeks blushed and it was then that I noticed how young she was, she can’t have been older than 20. “Was there something wrong?” “No, everything was perfect. I just need to speak to the owner for a moment if that’s okay?” Bethany nodded and picked up the phone, and the owner answered straight away. “Uh, hi Bruce. It’s Bethany here. Sorry to call you at home but I have a customer who would like to speak to you.” She was quiet for a moment. “I’m sorry, we did try hard. We did. She told me everything was good and she just wants to talk to you.” Bethany’s blush had turned a deeper pink as the owner’s voice rose, berating his staff member and I could see her eyes were welling up with tears. “Put the phone on speaker please, Bethany,” I asked calmly and gave her a reassuring smile. “And stay to listen to our conversation.” She did as asked without warning the owner and his voice continued, over the loud speaker now. “We’ve talked about all this Bethany, what did you do wrong? I can’t believe it, I can’t believe you.” “Hello, Bruce.” I interrupted, and was met with silence. “Bruce, it’s me, Sarah.” “Sarah? I-I didn’t know you were visiting today, I’m at home.” “I know,” I replied and winked at Bethany. “That was the point.” “You, you know each other?” She whispered, and I nodded in response. “Bruce, I wanted to speak to you straight away and congratulate you and your staff. Everything, from the new sign on the window to the cleanliness of the bathroom, to the tastiness of the food and quality of your newly trained barista’s coffee... was perfect.” Bethany raised her eyebrows in shock as she heard quiet sobs coming from the other end of the phone. She couldn’t believe her stern boss was crying! “Th-thank you, S-Sarah. Thank you so much for everything, for bringing us back from the dead.” I laughed. “Bruce, you could have taken every bit of advice I had given you, and thrown it out the window, continuing to do the things you were doing. But you chose to fight, to give it one more push and make the improvements this place so needed. And you and your staff did it. You didn’t just do it, you ACED it!” “So you don’t think we’ll be the lowest-rated restaurant in town anymore?” “Hah. Absolutely not. Once word gets out and customers have the same experience I just did, you and Bethany here are going to be rushed off your feet. People want, people NEED to socialise again now that restrictions have been lifted,” I reassured him. “And Fusion Delights is going to be THE place to go.” With more tears and congratulations, Bethany ended the phone call, and looked at me shaking her head, “you tricked me! You actually Mystery Shoppered me!” Smiling, I nodded and said “I did, that’s part of my job. I make recommendations and then I follow up with a sneaky visit, and do you know what the last recommendation is that I’ll be making to Bruce?” Bethany shook her head. “That Bethany gets a pay rise.” I was still smiling when I left Fusion Delights, the name Bruce and I had agreed upon when he hired me to help him revive his restaurant after the pandemic had forced him to cut costs and quality, resulting in it becoming the lowest-rated restaurant in town. But now this will change, and being part of that change is what drives me. May the five-star reviews roll in!