Article: If you’re overloaded by your own or someone else’s emotional experience, it’s best to delay any decision- making. Take a moment to reorient yourself before acting. When you’re caught up in an emotional reaction, it’s easy to say things you later regret or act impulsively. Ask for a break. Go outside and get some fresh air. Get a drink of water. Return when you’ve gotten your emotions back in check. You may often find yourself annoyed because others don't seem to respect your feelings, but you may not have conveyed them clearly. When you learn to clearly say what you are thinking, feeling, or wanting in a certain situation, you can avoid misunderstandings.  A great route to effectively stating your feelings is with "I" statements. This helps you convey your own experience without making the other person upset or defensive. You might say, "I feel ignored. I really need you to listen to me right now. I need your support." This is far better than, "You are a terrible listener." or "You are always ignoring me!" ” It can be hard to balance your feelings with others’ if you say "yes" to requests that don’t benefit you. You need to know when to say “no” and have the courage and discipline to do it. This simple strategy is a hallmark in emotional self-regulation.  For example, your mom suggests you drive down for the weekend to attend the family picnic. But, you have a major essay to finish for a college course. It’s completely normal to feel guilt, but that guilt (or your mom’s shaming you) shouldn’t force you to give in. The smartest response would be to say, “I’m sorry, Mom. I’d like to come, but I haven’t gotten started on my paper due on Tuesday. I can’t.” It’s also ok to just say “No.” You don’t always have to offer an excuse or an explanation. In some cases, the other person will take an explanation as an invitation to try to talk you out of your decision. One of the most important ways you can meet your own needs and others' is through compromise. This allows your own thoughts and feelings to be considered while also honoring those of others'. Compromise involves weighing the importance of a situation and coming to a mutual agreement.  You can weigh the importance of a situation by asking yourself how significant it is in the scheme of things. Will you care about this in a week, a month, or a year? If not, you might honor the other person's feelings or needs and set yours aside for the time being. If you both care equally about the issue at hand, you'll have to find common ground. For instance, you and your friend both want to see a movie, but can't agree on a choice. You might ask a third party to select one or you might decide to watch whichever one starts next when you arrive at the theater. If you consistently feel guilty, bullied, or manipulated when you interact with a person, consider whether they may be emotionally manipulating you. If so, you should try to limit your interactions with that person. A person may be manipulating you if they: Frequently lie or make excuses. Blame you for their own poor behavior or mistreatment of you. “Jokingly” insult or criticize you. Exploit your weaknesses to make you feel guilty, sad, or angry.

What is a summary?
Pause before making decisions. Express your feelings and needs clearly. Learn to say “no. Learn the art of compromise. Recognize the signs of emotional manipulation.