Article: Having a goal in mind for making a change can help to keep you motivated. Try to focus on the larger positive aspects of making the change rather than thinking about the negatives. For example, if you want to be a better public speaker, then try writing down what greater goal this will accomplish for you. Maybe being a good public speaker will allow you to become a personal coach or will be a requirement in starting your own business in the future. Write down whatever positive aspects you can think of to help motivate yourself. Instead of letting yourself run on autopilot, get into the habit of paying attention to your thoughts and actions. Notice which situations tend to make your unwanted personality traits come out, and develop strategies for handling these situations differently.  For instance, if you find yourself arguing when someone criticizes you at work, an alternate strategy might be to take a deep breath before you reply. To establish the habit of self-awareness, practice it for a week or two before you start trying to change your behavior. Affirmations are statements that trick your brain into thinking you’ve already achieved your desired outcome, which helps you change your habits more quickly. This is called a “fake it til you make it” approach and it is very effective. Come up with some inspiring affirmations that reflect your goals, and repeat them to yourself several times a day.  A couple of examples of good affirmations are “I feel confident and secure in myself” and “I accept responsibility for the things I do.” Repeat your affirmations first thing in the morning, right before you go to bed, and whenever you have an idle moment during the day. Make sure your affirmations are in the present tense, not the future tense. For instance, instead of saying “I will be optimistic,” say, “I am optimistic.” To change your personality, you’ve got to perform a new behavior over and over until it seems natural. This is a long process, so don’t miss an opportunity to practice. Seek out situations that give you the opportunity to behave differently than you’re used to.  If you want more opportunities to practice your conversational skills, for instance, you might resolve to go to lunch with your coworkers more often. You can also find support from friends, family, or even by connecting with new like-minded people. Try telling a close friend about your goals to help keep yourself accountable, or join a group such as by looking for a meetup in your area on Meetup.com. You might even consider joining a self-development organization to get help developing your new habit. For example, a very useful and well-known organization is called Landmark Education. These can be expensive, but the money may be worth it depending on the importance of the new habit. It can take months or years for your new personality to really feel like you. This is especially true if you’re over the age of 30. Stay persistent, even if you slip up or your progress is slower than you’d like. If you stick with your goals long enough, your brain will eventually forge the new connections you want. Keep in mind that developing a new habit will come with setbacks. Try to develop a plan for dealing with setbacks to help you continue to move forward and progress towards your goals.
What is a summary of what this article is about?
Focus on a goal. Be aware of your behavior. Use affirmations. Look for opportunities to practice your new behaviors. Be patient.