Definition: In this task, you are given a Reddit post as a text. Your task is to generate a title for this text. The title should start with "TIFU by", followed by a situation that caused humor. The title should contain 7-12 words, ideally.
Input: Text: so. today, i fucked up. yes yes, we all fuck up. i get it. obviously because there are 14,000+ other fucker uppers on right now. but seriously. i fucked up.

for a little backstory, let's go back to the end of march- i was still casually hooking up with my ex.. ya know, attempting the whole fwb thing. fine and good. never disappointing-- a sure thing. then i started casually dating two guys at the same time. in a matter of two days, i had slept with all three guys. -- and no, this is not a "maury,help!" tifu story--about a week after that, i noticed i had a yeast infection- obviously concerned, i stopped sleeping with everyone. i've always kept a clean shop- never had even a uti before, so i was trying to determine who i needed to stop fucking. 
after about 2 weeks, i thought i had narrowed it down to "bmw-3d printer dude" or the dirty after work sex i was having with "construction worker by day, rapper all the time dude". my idea was that "bmw-3d printer dude" had long finger nails which may have scratched up my labia causing some kind of infection 
--sidenote- guys trim your fucking nails, toes and otherwise- unless you're part of the columbia drug trade, that shit is gross and no one will want to fuck you--
"construction worker by day, rapper all the time dude" had this bumpy tongue. nothing crazy, just a few bumps like you have when you've just gotten over a cold. 
so, after careful consideration and being the kind of girl that needs to not be needed, i dropped "bmw-3d printer dude" because he was too clingy anyway and i couldn't make it past the long nails. 

this brings us to about a week ago. "construction worker, rapper dude" has been hanging out a lot- we finally decided to actually start dating and it's been wonderful. the dude knows how to please a woman. like-- seriously, from every angle, every stroke and every perfectly applied pressure point while going down. i have never had such incredibly imaginative sex until i met him. i was never able to get off from cunnilingus before we started fucking around. truly unreal. with that said, i developed another yeast infection. diflucan is an amazing drug and clears it up within a day or two, but i was still concerned.

this morning, my first day off from an incredibly stressful job, he left for work and i stayed in bed curiously poking around webmd. 

then i saw it-- fucking thrush. http://www.webmd.com/oral-health/guide/dental-health-thrush

i immediately texted him inquiring about the bumpiness of his tongue. the texts came across as rather accusatory, and presumptuous, but i didn't really care at this point. i was half asleep and fighting a still itchy vagina. that's a rough combination.

he was confused, blissfully unaware that his tongue was even the slightest bit abnormal. he even called to let me know that he had the dudes at the construction site look at his tongue, and they didn't notice anything weird. 

by the end of the call, i had successfully accused him of giving me a vaginal infection with his mouth. 

i don't think he's coming back over tonight.

yay for me!

TIFU by enjoying company with a bumpy tongue