Definition: In this task, you are given a Reddit post as a text. Your task is to generate a title for this text. The title should start with "TIFU by", followed by a situation that caused humor. The title should contain 7-12 words, ideally.
Input: Text: so this by far has been the weirdest and worst wardrobe malfunction i have ever experienced.

i, like many people, work in a small cubicle farm. there are few things i look forward to each day outside of lunch and leaving. my daily constitutional is one of those things. everyday, at approximately 9am, i make my way to my appointment. it's quiet, it's private, and it gives me a few moments of respite from an otherwise taxing day. today was no different. i arrived on schedule and found the room to be empty. my throne was bare, awaiting me.

i usually take this time to reflect on the morning and maybe distract myself with a game. today's game was dots. a game that does not require two hands to play. i had finished making my deposit and was jut sitting there, mostly giving myself an opportunity to finish level 334. i have no reason and no excuse to play this game anymore, but for some reason, i persist.

suddenly, i felt it. in a half of a second, i realized i had a tremendous sneeze coming on. i had just enough time to think, "man, i should really take one of my hands off this phone, just in case...". instead i froze, paralyzed to do anything but accept whatever fate may bring. i sneezed. i sneezed ferociously. with both of my hands occupied and/or confused, i had no ability no to restrain my dangling wang. needless to say, the force of the sneeze ejected at least an ounce, possibly two, of previously unrelieved urine.
at first, i noticed a little more than a dribble on the floor, just behind the heel of my shoe. then, i noticed a minor piddle seeping into my pants, from the half dollar sized puddle just above my back left pants pocket. i got my belt too. oh and i'm assuming the initial force and trajectory helped get the first 7 or so drops over the back of my pants, making a direct hit on the crotch of pants, to the left and below the zipper. to add insult to injury, i moistened approximately 4 inches of waistband on my boxers as well.

i wore white, light weight khakis today. i did my best to dry them off, but there was only some much i could do. i trudged back to my desk, through the cubicle minefield, avoiding eye contact and conversation with my coworkers, as if they were medusa herself.
i sat in those same pee pants until my lunch break. i'm not sure if anyone else could smell me, but i know i could smell me. and i did not appreciate me. not one bit. i went home on my lunch break and changed into a remarkably similar pair of pants. not one person said a word to me. but deep down, i know they knew. i'm just scared exactly how much it is, they know.

 
to answer your question, no,peeing your pants doesn't make you cool. the bus driver from billy madison had it all wrong. she had nothing on miles davis and neither do i.


long time lurker, finally had something worth sharing, hope you enjoyed.

TIFU by peeing my pants at work (NSFW)