Definition: In this task, you are given a Reddit post as a text. Your task is to generate a title for this text. The title should start with "TIFU by", followed by a situation that caused humor. The title should contain 7-12 words, ideally.
Input: Text: happened in january, but noteworthy,nonetheless. my boyfriend and i were on a business retreat, out of town, in a swanky golf resort hotel that apparently does not equip their rooms with a bottle opener. the last evening we were there, we had a few drinks. i decide to open a beer with the most unnecessarily sharp and huge seal team knife i've ever seen. i've done this about a thousand times before, and don't think anything of it. though in my slightly tipsy stupor, the knife was turned toward me, rather than away. applying some pressure toward the bottle, and using the end of the handle of said knife, i await the sweet release of the cap from bottle, slip, and slice the fuck out of my hand. a gnarly slice 12cm long and deeper than hell presents itself between the knuckle of my index and middle fingers. 

after arguing for a good twenty minutes with my boyfriend about going to the emergency room, finally i submit. flash forward two hours, after we've seen a man roll through the er who had "been stabbed in the back," and welcoming a gentleman whose very overweight and traumatized girlfriend greeted the woman at reception desk by saying "i accidentally shot his pinky off..." we leave. went to the immediate care first thing in the morning after being patched up to the best of our ability. ended up with internal and surface stitches (11 total), and permanent damage to my hand. i'm an administrative assistant, so the next few weeks were challenging, and i'm still trying to gain full function back from the tendon damage.

TIFU by trying to open a beer with a seal team knife