Definition: Given a real-life anecdote of a complex ethical situation, generate a suitable title that describes the main event/root cause of the situation. Imagine that the given text is a social media post, and you have to write the title of the post, so the users can decide to read the main text or not.
Input: The title is fairly self explanatory. My (29M) fiancee (28F) is graduating from a history master's program soon. Her plan had always been to go on for a PhD afterward, which sounded great to me, I just want her to enjoy what she does. After finishing the masters though she feels like years more school will run her into the ground and might be too much misery for too little reward.


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I have always paid for everything while she has been in school. We have a household checking account that I keep full that is used for groceries/gas/mortgage/doctor visits and things like that. The only thing she ever spends her money on is clothing or things like that if she is shopping and I'm not with her... I have been and am fine with this arrangement. She works ridiculously hard in school and I dont want her to have to work to pay bills too. She gets paid enough of a stipend to have pocket money for random shopping trips and such, and whenever she needs something bigger I buy it...


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So... I'm in SaaS sales and I do make really good money. We have a very nice house, the mortgage is only about 10% of what I take home after taxes, and we manage to put a good good chunk of money away in savings every month while still pretty much buying and doing what we want to. We were talking last night about what kind of jobs she might apply for now that she is thinking no PhD, and she casually brought up the notion of her maybe not working at all. After talking a bit more I could tell that she didnt feel as casual about it as she was acting and that she had been strongly considering that as her ideal option. Her main point was that since we dont need the money there is no reason for her to work.


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I get where she is coming from since we really don't "need" the money, but for some reason the idea of her sitting around doing nothing all day just kind of bothers me, especially since she has always been super driven with an enormous work ethic in school. Also, since now she does make a small stipend, that would take her from having some money that was strictly hers to spend on whatever she pleases to only having money that she got from me, and I don't like the idea of her feeling like she doesn't have money of her own to spend and like she has to rely on me for everything. There is also the fact that if she doesn't work she will probably end up super bored and unhappy.


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We are planning to possibly have kids in a few years, and she also said that she couldn't really start a full career when she would be leaving to take care of kids before too long (which I would be fine with).


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So she seems to think I am being an asshole for saying all that and trying to get her to work when we dont need the money. She says it doesn't really affect me either way, since I'd be doing the exact same thing whether she has a job or not, but it seems like it would end up affecting me in other ways to me...


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Am I being an asshole?

wanting my fiancee to have a job even though we don't need the money