Definition: In this task, you are given a Reddit post as a text. Your task is to generate a title for this text. The title should start with "TIFU by", followed by a situation that caused humor. The title should contain 7-12 words, ideally.
Input: Text: so, i'm currently sitting on the floor with a hot compress over my left eye. about 20 minutes ago i decided to snack on some delicious hot fries (the fried spicy snack chip). no big deal, except i have a bad habit of not washing my hands well before taking my contacts out. my wife gets onto me all the time, but i've never had anything bad happen before. so the hell with it. 

as you can probably already guess, i just came up stairs, filled up my contact lens case with solution, and went to pull my left contact out. immediately, as soon as my fingers plucked the lens from my eye, it felt like the vengeful striking hammer of thor was smashing me right in the fucking face. the stinging sweat of the devils ass crack was moisturizing my cornea. it was like being under the rocket ship at cape canaveral right as it launches. i think it actually singed off my eyelashes in the process. 

i screamed, woke my wife up, woke the dogs and the neighbors up, and proceeded to frantically wash my hands before splashing cold water in my face. fast forward a few minutes, now i'm sitting on the bathroom floor. everyone's back in the bed, mjolnir is back by thor's side, and i'm here trying to type this up with one hand and one eye. 

g'night reddit. i'm going to curl up into a ball and cry now.

TIFU by taking my contacts out without washing my hands....