Definition: In this task, you are given a Reddit post as a text. Your task is to generate a title for this text. The title should start with "TIFU by", followed by a situation that caused humor. The title should contain 7-12 words, ideally.
Input: Text: this happened on this day about 5 years ago, so it still counts, right? anyways, i’m in the army and on this special day in 2010 i just so happened to have cq. for those who don’t know, i sit behind a desk at the entrance of the barracks for 24 hours ensuring the safety of the soldiers who live there. it’s post valentines and a lot of the soldiers are young and single and they found the love of their life just a couple of days ago. go them. 

it’s about 8pm when a soldier walks in with his, i’m assuming, girlfriend. all visitors have to be signed in and i have to check her id card to ensure she is not underage or anything like that. i’m giving them a hard time, because i’m bored and have nothing better to do with my time. they come in and out multiple times, i guess they’re smokers, and i make her sign in and out and check her id again over and over. it’s a weekday so visiting hours is over at midnight, so i have to go to all the rooms who signed in visitors to tell them times up. if you didn’t get your dick wet by now, tough shit. oh, the couple i was giving a hard time to earlier haven’t signed out yet. i head up to his room, and loud music playing. take note: loud music after 8pm is not allowed per our standard operating procedures. two strikes, homie. i beat on the door and the music gets turned down, i head some shuffling, and the soldier peaks his head out, obviously naked. i tell him she has 30 seconds to leave, time now. of course it took a little longer, but i’ll let it slide this time. she leaves with her hair a mess and walking bow legged. not my problem.

here’s where the fuck up happens. i’ve been dabbing into online dating for about 2 weeks and haven’t had much success. it’s a small town outside of our military post, and i already know the options are going to be limited. i really didn’t take it serious to be honest. i got a message from a girl when i woke up from my sleep after my 24 hour shift, and talking about how good looking i was and i seem interesting and whatever. curiosity spikes and i check her profile, and she looks familiar but i couldn’t quite put my finger on where i might have seen her. i messaged back saying thanks but looking at her profile made it seem like we wouldn’t be a good match. i’m a nice guy like that. i thought i put her down softly and wouldn’t get a reply or just some kind of hate-mail i can just ignore. nope. she messaged back just a couple minutes after i replied saying things about not being serious, just hanging out. all things to lead “i want the d.” eh, why not. i didn’t reply yet, i wanted to take a shower. half way through my shower, i’m finally wide awake and it dawns on me. that was the girl from last night! i laughed to myself and had to quickly call her out on this. i asked her if she was the girl i was giving a hard time to when her boyfriend brought her to the barracks. “omg! i thought you looked familiar. in fact, i was hoping it was you! you’re so hot. he’s not my boyfriend, just someone to fool around with but was disappointed.” that was probably because i interrupted but that’s not the point. i pretty much told her to fuck off that i’m not into “barracks bunnies.” she didn’t reply. i had to tell the dude, but it seemed like he ok with it. poor guy.

it’s been about a month since said incident, and i started seeing someone. we’re at the mall going to see a movie when i feel someone grab my shoulder, spin me around and a huge sting comes across my face. when my vision clears, i see the barracks bunny. “you asshole! you got me pregnant and stopped talking to me!” wait, what? this is going to damper my date now. a lot of yelling from her, and a lot of slight laughing from me, the security guards finally came and controlled the situation. my date looks a little irritated at this point, but luckily i saved those messages from that dating site and showed her the messages of how i didn’t have any interest in her and she took the barracks bunny comment a little harder than i intended. she believed me, but broke up with me soon after because it seemed like i had some “extra baggage” that i needed to take care of. i didn’t date again until i moved away.

 

**edit:** i see a lot of hate going on because i had to interrupt them. some of you need to realize that at 10 minutes after midnight, my sergeant major will come into the barracks to make sure i'm doing my job right. if he would've showed up when they were still in there, it would be on me. so, i don't need to apologize for doing my job right. maybe i should have just ignored her from the beginning and not responded to her, but regardless, she shouldn't have slapped me in public and make a total scene for no reason.

TIFU by trying online dating in a small town.