Definition: Given a real-life anecdote of a complex ethical situation, generate a suitable title that describes the main event/root cause of the situation. Imagine that the given text is a social media post, and you have to write the title of the post, so the users can decide to read the main text or not.
Input: This is in the UK, if that matters.


My[22M] SO[21F] has an older friend [40ishM] 'Bill' whom she is very close with. Their relationship in my eyes is too close and I've discussed this with her before but she thinks I'm being an over protective and reading into things. 


 I don't know much about Bill, other than that they met through facebook before I knew her. He's in a relationship I think, and works in a carehome with kids.


Their relationship has always been a point of arguments for us. Bill often sends her money, and pays for gifts for her (like phones) and even drives 2+ hours each way to see her sometimes, as we moved to a different city recently. He even got a tattoo of a line from one of her poems on his arm.


They use to send each other messages daily and talk about very emotional stuff. They'd send lots of kisses at the end of each message and she told me they even say they love each other. She insists this is all platonic and they both only see each other as friends. She's never hidden any of this from me which leads me to believe she isn't lying. However, she has hidden Bill sending her money before and almost seems to deliberately move away when they message sometimes. She says this is because I try to read the messages over her shoulder, but he's the only person I've noticed her do it for. Also, when he comes up to visit her, it's when I'm busy or they go out alone together. Even if I'm free, and I'd be willing to go with them. She said it was because she wants to spend time with her friend alone.


We'd argued about this before and ended up arguing about it a few times more, but finally we came to a kind of conclusion where I thought she agreed with me that my insecurities were valid and she'd lower the level of the relationship. From then she stopped messaging him as much.


However, from before all this ( before me and my SO met even) they'd arranged to go to a gig in another city (Bill is paying for everything, tickets, hotel and anything like food). Now, this is not all I am concerned about. Initially I was weary about this, had said to her I was anxious as well, but was going to be ok with her going. 


He's driving the 2+ hours (out of the way I should add) to pick her up and then they are driving to the other city ~2 hours from here. This is on a Friday. It turned out my friend who lives in that city wanted to meet up with me and her, so I said it would be convenient if I could go with my SO and Bill as they drive down. I'd meet up with our friends as they see the gig and then me and her spend the rest of the weekend with our friends and get the train back. (Note: my SO is the one who told me they wanted to meet up, and I said it was the same weekend she was going away so it would work. She didn't realise it was the same weekend.)


She said sure at first, but we didn't actually talk about it. As it's coming up closer I was trying to figure out what we're meant to be doing and she didn't really seem like she wanted to talk about it. Then she started saying how she'd feel bad about ditching Bill on the Saturday. I said we wouldn't meet our friends until the evening anyway and that me and her could spend the day with Bill. She said she didn't want me there and would rather spend the day with him alone, as Bill has spent all this money on her and Bill know I'm not his biggest fan. Then she started saying how she felt like me saying I should go down with them was me keeping an eye on them, and that it would be awkward for all three of us to go together. I was a bit upset by this, and I really need to know if I'm being a dick by being anxious about all this? The argument got a bit heated and now she's said she wants to go down to see her family a few days before.


AITA for being concerned by all this?


Happy to elaborate or answer any questions people may have! Thanks for reading.



thinking my SO friendship with another man[40ish] is crossing a line