Definition: Given a real-life anecdote of a complex ethical situation, generate a suitable title that describes the main event/root cause of the situation. Imagine that the given text is a social media post, and you have to write the title of the post, so the users can decide to read the main text or not.
Input: First off, using a throwaway &amp; typing on mobile so sorry about that. Also TLDR at the end. 

Alright, so my boyfriend and I have never been in a relationship before so we're both quite new to the romance department. Im just curious about where I land in this situation. 

Background: 

My bf and I have a mutual friend I'll call Sam. I've always been closer to Sam but my Bf has known him longer. I talk to Sam a lot because I genuinely enjoy his friendship and our conversations, but also because I feel a bit bad for him. He always complains about how lonely he is and he has a lot of personal family issues that I relate to so I kind of sympathize.

However, our friendship has never gone past anything platonic and I have never given him any indication that im interested or offered to hang out alone with him, etc.

A couple of months ago I had a bit of a disagreement with my Bf and I suffer from anxiety and mild paranoia so I was wholeheartedly convinced he was going to break up with me. I was legit freaking out, sobbing, the works. Tbh very embarrassing looking back but what's done is done. 

I messaged a few of my friends to kind of console me and maybe gauge the severity of the situation because I knew I couldn't do it myself. I have a few female AND male friends besides Sam, whom I contacted. I also decided to talk to Sam just because he was friends (albeit not very close, but he's known him a long time) with my Bf and I just wanted an additional opinion. 

Sam is very nice to me but he kept on telling me to break up with my Bf and saying "I deserved better" and that "maybe I should move on". I really really really did not want to break up so I took his opinion with a grain of salt but politely thanked him for his input and said "I'll see." Since then, Sam has never mentioned how I should break up with my Bf, but he has been talking to me a LOT more than before, plus he asks me to hang out on our own, which I always politely decline or suggest a group setting. 

Fast Forward:

A week or two ago I couldn't login to my snapchat so I asked my Bf to login for me and do my streaks (yeah yeah, very immature, pls don't hate me haha). I was not at all concerned about this because I have nothing to hide and he's done my streaks before for me. He does them and all is well. 

However, once I login to my snapchat later that day, I notice that he's messaged a lot of people on my account, and Sam is one of them. I didn't really care but I thought maybe he said something funny so I checked the messages and he was just chatting with Sam casually. No biggie. (Sam saves all chats so I could see the convo).

Then my Bf texts me. He asks why Sam was flirting with me and why he told me to break up with my Bf. Im honestly super confused because I don't remember Sam ever flirting with me. I check the messages and see the bit where I was freaking out. I then explain the situation and apologize, telling him I never wanted to break up and that I was venting to a friend (I had never messaged Sam that I wanted to break up with Bf or that I was mad at him).

Here's the kicker: my Bf gets PISSED. He tells me that he no longer wants to speak to Sam after the rude things he said and that he feels uncomfortable with me continuing to communicate with Sam, although he of course will not stop me and I can still do so if I want. He then sends Sam a message stating how upset he is, how he never wants to talk to him again, how he doesn't want him talking to me, etc.

Sam has not spoken to me since and I feel awful about it. I never wanted to break up with Bf and I never wanted to date Sam, I just wanted to be friends and never recognized what he was saying as flirting, although I did think it wasn't very appropriate for me to hang out with him by myself (which I never did). I was also a little uncomfortable that my Bf was just reading months and months back into my snapchat messages with my friends, but since I don't have anything to hide im not that upset, I just really value my privacy. 

So AITA? Should I have told Bf that Sam told me to break up with him? Should my Bf have told Sam to stop talking to me without my consideration? I am just very confused and upset and have been thinking about it a lot.

TLDR; I was very scared that my Bf would break up with me &amp; a friend told me that I should break up with him first. Bf read my message history &amp; got upset &amp; told friend to never talk to him or me again, ending our friendship. AITA for not telling Bf that friend told me these things?


not telling my boyfriend his friend was flirting with me