Definition: In this task, you are given a Reddit post as a text. Your task is to generate a title for this text. The title should start with "TIFU by", followed by a situation that caused humor. The title should contain 7-12 words, ideally.
Input: Text: please dont use a knife to open packets of any type. this is my own personal  psa to the world.
this was yesterday. i can't believe how dumb i am.
my folks have been coming over on mondays for dinner since they will soon move out of the country. yesterday evening we prepared pho with all the trimmings. i was trying, unsuccessfully to open a heat sealed packet of cilantro by hand so i figured i'd use my knife and this was the moment the fuck up occurred. 
i picked up the package to cut it open.
they tell you not to do stuff like this. it's a common safety tip not to cut anything in the air or in your hand or open a package with a knife.
thousands of nights of home made dinners, possibly a hundred fruit/veggie tray preps, and not a cut. giving birth without drugs could not prepare me for the pain / crime scene-ish bloody kitchen nightmare that occurred. in a flash i felt crazy pain, and saw my finger, only for a split second without the tip- then an insane blood flow. it was like a faucet. 
my husband turned ghost white.
it took about 30 minutes of pressure to stop the bleeding. my folks, both medical professionals deemed the small part of my finger not worth reattaching ( loads of surface area missing, just not a lot of actual skin) suggested the er might be a wasted visit.

this  evening i had to change the dressing and my blood had fused gauz eonto my finger. since i was in such a rush to apply pressure i did not create a barrier between the two. at the suggestion of my folks it was better to remove and redress. reliving the pain from removing the stuck on gauze made me vomit....twice...this is a public service announcement.

 

edit: thank for the stories of how some of you sliced your fingers. it feels wrong to say but the collective suffering comforts me (i'm a monster i'm sure).

edit 2 :  people asking for pics... i can't process the logic of  this. pain threshold is pretty high- visual threshold, not so much. my vomit factor is on edge but i'll see if i can do it when i change to dressing tonight. you guys are sick, ha!

edit 3: i said i was dumb already guys!  it was a human error, a mistake- i was answering a question at the time it happened. my focus was off the task. someone who uses a knife more than once daily will have more cuts over their lifetime overall i would assume as statistics go.  i prep/prepare anywhere from 10-21 meals a week from scratch consistently for 6+ years. muscle memory can't save my stupidity as a human every once and a while, haha. still human, still dumb, still psa either way- buy a multi pack of scissors and place them where they are easy to get. don't be dumb like me (we know-  i suck), the right tool is best.

TIFU by opening a sealed package of cilantro