Definition: In this task, you are given a Reddit post as a text. Your task is to generate a title for this text. The title should start with "TIFU by", followed by a situation that caused humor. The title should contain 7-12 words, ideally.
Input: Text: throw away because.  

not a great storyteller so bare with me here.

so this dates back to last night.  i'm in college and i had a party at my house.  it involved throwing paint on people and drinking a lot.  i drank way too much and i blacked out. can't add much more about last night because i simply don't remember.

fast forward to this morning. i wake up to the sound of a fire alarm going off, still drunk im pretty sure.  and im like... no way is this happening.  i straight up said, if there is a real fire, i am willing to die.  (it was just a faulty alarm).  i felt like shit, and absolutely couldn't move.  but then i feel something.  my ass feels so moist... and it smells like absolute shit.  i get up, and see that there is shit everywhere.  on my sheets, on the floor, in my fuckin hamper.  so i quickly go to turn on the lights to really see whats happening.  and i step in my own shit.  i say to myself... this isnt real life. it cant be.  so obviously my first instinct was to record it, which i did.  unfortunately, the firemen got to my house and i couldn't leave my room naked, with shit on me, in front of a bunch of firemen.  so i am just standing, in shit, for about 10 minutes until the firemen leave.  then i run and hop in the shower and rinse my asshole for a good 20 minutes.  the only thought that is going through my head while im in the shower is fuckkkkk.  

i get back to my room and it smells awful.  i went straight scorched-earth on my room.  i took out the carpet, i ripped apart my bed, i threw out my garbage pail.  and did as much damage control as i could.  i had to go buy new everything.  which costed so much.  hundreds down the drain.  (quick rip bank account).  and the rest of the day i have just been reassessing my life.

i told my friends and they thought it was hilarious, so i figured i would share it with you.  

(maybe i could show the vids to the mods so they could confirm its true or something, but definitely not posting that in here)

TIFU by taking the costliest shit of my life. (NSFW)