Definition: Given a real-life anecdote of a complex ethical situation, generate a suitable title that describes the main event/root cause of the situation. Imagine that the given text is a social media post, and you have to write the title of the post, so the users can decide to read the main text or not.
Input: In March 2017 I was scheduled for an abortion after an unexpected pregnancy. I decided I would try to keep the baby last minute and told my grandfather. He called me to yell at me that I should paint my face black and stand in the WIC line because if I keep my baby I'll be a welfare queen. He said I have nothing to offer a baby. Those are the two things that stand out specifically after time has passed but there were other, hurtful things as well. I told him that I was under duress and did not appreciate him yelling at me, said goodbye, and hung up. He texted me to have a nice life.

I don't hear from him or his new wife (married one month after this incident) until two months after I have the baby. He shows up at my mom's house while I was there and I was very civil. 

It's been about another year since I heard from him. My mom is urging me to let the past go. I refuse. He says he will not apologize because "it's how he felt." I'm not asking for an apology for his feelings, I want him to acknowledge that what he said was hurtful, racist, uncalled for, and untrue. Then I will talk to him again.  Additionally, i dont want my daughter to develop the same relationship with him that I had - he was very harsh, critical, and judgmental. Not a person that I'd consider nice. Not a person my daughter needs in her life.

My grandfather and his wife requested that I send the baby up to his house with my mom today to collect Christmas gifts. I said no. My cousins, brother, aunt, and mom went up to do Christmas.

When they came back, my family (except my mom) said that my grandfather's wife called me a bitch when she realized the baby wasn't there. They gave the couple a framed portrait of all us grandchildren for Christmas and my grandfather's wife said she needed to cut me out of the picture to be complete.

Now, my mom said she needed to video my daughter opening the gifts to send to them. I said no, that I have no obligation to allow them to see her. I told her if my daughter was only allowed gifts at the expense of seeing them, then we don't need the gifts. I will not accept bribes or mistreatment. All of my life my grandfather has told me "I will give you x, y, z if you do a, b, c." His love was conditional and had to be earned.

I don't believe in conditional love of a child and I dont want to perpetuate this with my daughter.

So am I the asshole? My husband agrees with me and I feel just, but I dont know if I have tunnel vision from a hurt I should have let go. 

limiting my daughter's contact with my grandfather