Definition: In this task, you are given a Reddit post as a text. Your task is to generate a title for this text. The title should start with "TIFU by", followed by a situation that caused humor. The title should contain 7-12 words, ideally.
Input: Text: tifu well, it was a while back, but this is something i don't think i can come back from; so much so that this is a throwaway.

 

a little background: my so, we'll call him johnny, and i are really close to our families and often times we have a family member staying at our home for days at a time. we are gracious hosts and always make sure that our wine cellar is stocked for when out guests/family want a little alcohol with a meal or party.

so, for the "incident": 9 weeks ago we had johnny's brother at our house, we will call him jamison. he's a good looking guy, not going to lie there, but johnny and i have been together for years and i have no interest in his brother, however; one night of profuse wine intake made me a little incoherent, and flirty. i was unaware at the time of my fuck up and i wound up having sex with jamison. he went his way, i went mine and i only remembered getting laid, so naturally, i assumed it was with johnny and i didn't think anything of it.

so, today i go to my obgyn and find out i am, in fact, pregnant. yay! we've been trying to have a baby, so i'm excited. i go home to tell johnny the good news and playfully say that we need to have dunk sex more often to which he replied, "we have never had drunk sex". at this point i think he is pulling a pretty cruel prank, and i reminded him of the night jamison him and i got drunk, to which he replied, "if you had sex that night it wasn't with me."

realization kicked in and now i feel like the worst so in the whole world.




-update:

i had a lot of requests for an update, so...

jamison is now surprisingly excited about being a father. i was definitely not expecting that. he and johnny had a heart-to-heart, and it looks like they want to work things out as a team. johnny initially asked me to move out, but changed his mind as i was about to leave.

TIFU By Not Keeping It In My Pants