Definition: In this task, you are given a Reddit post as a text. Your task is to generate a title for this text. The title should start with "TIFU by", followed by a situation that caused humor. The title should contain 7-12 words, ideally.
Input: Text: our first year anniversary is in a few days. my wife - who shops online with a ghost-in-the-shell-level of frequency and proficiency - warned me that "something" is coming in the mail and not to open it.

well, when you put it that way...

something came in the mail and i opened it. this is not entirely my fault. it had her name as the addressee, but the return address was from a dealer in antique parchments. i...i must have blacked out or something in excitement, because the envelope was suddenly open on the counter before me.

it took a moment to realize, "oooohh, first year is paper, this is a paper gift." i collect antique books and this sort of thing is exactly the sort of thing i like. in a florid, handwritten script, a bunch of beautiful garbeldeygook festooned a wine-and-ink-stained page with an official seal from the city of lyon and dated 1689. i'm usually more goal-oriented in the things i collect; but this was a gorgeous piece of parchment, thoughtfully given.

at this point, you've likely assumed that me opening...that the spontaneous and unexplained appearance of the parchment from its mailer is the source of today's fu. i'm afraid i must refer you once more to the title.

my wife understands me pretty well. so she wasn't in the least surprised or angry when certain ancient documents suddenly appeared in my possession. she was excited to see what she ordered, and to be showered with praise for the thoughtful gift.

because i'm that kind of guy, i sat down with my french dictionary to translate the words that i didn't understand (which is most of them). my wife was also curious to know what i came up with. she ordered it because it was old and pretty; the website merely titled the listing as antique official papers. after a few minutes of translation, i closed the dictionary with what must have been an unreadable expression. my wife, standing by, asks what i came up with.

for our first anniversary, my wife presented me with 17th century french divorce papers.

TIFU by translating French on my anniversary.