Definition: Given a real-life anecdote of a complex ethical situation, generate a suitable title that describes the main event/root cause of the situation. Imagine that the given text is a social media post, and you have to write the title of the post, so the users can decide to read the main text or not.
Input: So there's a lot of story but I'll start with the TL;DR: I came out as transgender (mtf) and my wife came out as pansexual. Her very Mormon family flipped out. Her sister blocked me on Facebook making my wife angry because we're a package deal. Her sister refused to acknowledge my pronouns until recently. A bunch more drama ensues - most of it around me and my relationship with my niece. Her sister is either lying about what happened, a 1 in a billion glitch happened, or she honestly has memory issues. So her sister won't apologize and is mad at being called a liar. Her daughter (our niece) is crying about missing us. I bumped into them and she spent 5 minutes explaining to her daughter my new pronouns and how I am a girl. Wife is still upset and hurt and doesn't want to fix things. A child is honestly crying over not seeing us. I'm mad. I've nicely talked about it with her, because I know she's hurting so me being angry won't help. But in my mind she needs to grow up, be the bigger person, and work stuff out with her sister - even if it means compromising things she'd rather not. AITA for being upset here?

So to go into more detail. We announced leaving the mormon church and came out all in one fell swoop. My wifes sister and her fought because she didn't tell her. Her sister said it was a betrayal not to confide on her and that she should have told her the moment she knew I was transgender. At this point, my wife actually brought up conversations where she tried, and brought up transgender people in general and her sister said down right transphobic things. Even saying that all transgender people are child molesters. Her sister acknowledged that she said those things, acknowledged that she still felt those things and then told her sister it wasn't too late to leave me. 

My wife goes on a tirade for about 2-3 months on Facebook with bi-weekly posts about how the mormon church is an awful organization. I post daily, I use rhetoric that I know is hurtful because I'm mad. It's part of what happens when you find out your depression was preyed upon to bring you to a false-god. Rightfully, this causes some distress to her family, sister included.

Her sister uses the take a break option on Facebook with me making it so I can only see her public posts. The next week she calls my wife and tells her she misses talking and can they chat more about life. She doesn't use the right pronouns for me and when confronted with it she says she never will. Invites my wife to my nieces birthday and at that point my wife agrees to go because she knows my niece shouldn't be caught in between them. 

My wife goes and is informed of the rules. No telling the niece to call me aunt (I was specifically told I wasn't invited). They weren't to use my pronouns around her while talking about me. And there would be no talk of me transitioning. The niece was told to only refer to me by John (pretend dead name so I don't dox myself) or it (not he or she). My wife comes home and says that she wouldn't deal with her sister if it wasn't for the niece. 

A few months go by and it's my wifes birthday. I'm big on family and conversations with her mom were going well - though tenuous. I asked her if she wanted to get together with them and her response was, only so we can see the niece. So I set it all up. I was told I wasn't allowed to be alone with the niece ever and I wasn't to hug her or touch her unless she was in immediate danger. And the same rules my wife had before. When I asked why I was told that I know why. Now, bear in mind, Brother In Law has been relatively silent about this, but chose to enforce these rules with me. His brother lived with them, child-sat and was alone with their daughter for hours at a time. Not really noteworthy his brother if you ignore the fact that he had just gotten out of a 5 year prison stay for sexually assaulting children as young as the niece. 

The birthday party comes and goes and my wife agrees that her mom is really trying and would like to see more of her. We hang out with her mom once a month and anytime I'm in the area for work I get together alone with her for lunch or dinner. She's treating my wife better than I have ever seen her, and honestly she's fun to be around most times. We have a great time and we've worked most of it out. She struggles to use my pronouns, but no more than my own mom and she's always quick to correct herself. She hasn't used my dead name in months, so the relationship is thriving there.

One day, at a lunch with her, I find out that my wifes sister is having a pretty big surgery and unexpectedly within a week. She never calls my wife or texts her only letting her find out if it went well through her husband Facebook post (which I couldn't see still). This drives a bigger wedge between them. During her surgery there was a moment where her heart stopped and that caused them to talk to their daughter about death. (She's 6). Every night since she prays she gets to see her aunt and me before we die. (Were in our 20s so it's not about to happen, but she doesn't get that). My mother in law informs me of this and the fact that she's cried quite a few times about it during a phonecall trying to plan Christmas. 

Well, my wifes sister messaged her last week and went with the whole we never talk and it's because of you (despite never reaching out herself) and I want to know why. So my wife tells her it's because she doesn't respect me, treats me worse than an actual pedophile she knows, and blocked me on Facebook. We're a package deal, if you cut one of us out of your life you cut the other. They go back and forth and the sisters timeline doesn't match up to when she actually blocked me - she says it was after the birthday party but we know that's not the case (thanks to my religious journaling). She then unblocked me and claims that she had done it weeks ago but conveniently didn't actually take effect until the same day she was confronted about it. They never resolved the issue and my wife called her a liar and stopped responding.

I happened to have another lunch with my mother in law the next day and it had snowed so my wifes sister had to borrow her moms car so I had to pick her up at their place. Well, she fell in the driveway, so when we got back from lunch I shoveled their driveway. My wifes sister pulled up with my niece in the backseat and my niece was desperately trying to get out but my wifes sister was talking to her. A five minute conversation later and they got out. My niece used the right pronouns and the right name. My wifes sister never used any pronouns or names. She did let my niece give me a hug goodbye. 

So I tell my wife all this. She knows about my crying niece. She knows all of it and she still doesn't want to try to fix things. I've told her she doesn't have to take blame. I've told her you can fix things by giving her another chance. She's clearly trying herself and my wife says it sucks for the niece but her sister refuses to acknowledge her wrongdoing and until she does she won't see her. My wife has acknowledge her wrongdoing to her. 

Don't get me wrong, I'm still mad about the things she's said and done but I'd rather move forward and fix family issues than let them get worse. I haven't used the words grow up with my wife. Like I said, when we talk about this, I am calm, cool and collected. I've tried to reason with her. I've talked about the turmoil its cause everyone. She says without an apology and acceptance of wrongdoing she won't see her. While her sister is clearly trying (or at least pretending to try for her daughters sake) she wants and demands an apology. 

Until we came out and left the mormon church they were super close. They have lived together in adulthood. They have always been two peas in a pod. But then everything happened and now my wife won't move past it. 

AITA for thinking my wife needs to grow up and be the bigger person here? Or is she right in her anger. 

thinking my wife needs to grow up