Definition: In this task, you are given a Reddit post as a text. Your task is to generate a title for this text. The title should start with "TIFU by", followed by a situation that caused humor. The title should contain 7-12 words, ideally.
Input: Text: i'm dying over here. i'm just counting my blessings that i made it home in one piece and didn't get arrested. the concert was yesterday, and today i am drowning in regret. 

i'm female. i had bought tickets to see a group i like and was looking forward to the show for weeks. i should mention that i live in a russian-speaking country but am actually american. oh the horror, being american and making such an ass out of myself.

i decided to bring some vodka in a water bottle to sip on before the doors opened, so i did. i was feeling lit, but still when the opening act started i drank three more vodka and juice drinks at the bar. wtf was i thinking?

also, i got something in my right eye, possibly contaminated makeup, and my eye turned red and was watering. it hurt less to keep one eye closed. i don't want to imagine how shitty i must have looked.

i am not sure what happened but the security walked me to the coat check and got my coat for me. i asked him "what do you want?" in russian and he replied "we think you need some fresh air".

thank goodness i was compliant at this point. i just decided "go the fuck home" and walked to the metro station. my mouth was watering like i might vomit, and it hurts to admit, i spit on the floor. oh i am so ashamed.

i am on the metro. the door of my carriage opens and a policeman walks up to me. i ask him in russian "what do you want?" he tells me to come with him. i don't think i spoke. he walks me outside to the street.
i ask him, "what should i do?" and he tells me to take the bus.

i get on the bus. i don't have a ticket. the attendant comes over and i just figure i am getting fined for not having a ticket and i take out my wallet and ask her how much i should pay. she walks me to the door and it's obvious i'm supposed to get off of the bus.

i get off of the bus and walk the rest of the way home.

this morning i wake up and i see there is a bag by the door. i bought groceries last night on the way home. i bought two beautiful and kinds pricey packages of fresh raw chicken, which at this point has been sitting on my floor at room temperature all night. i can't eat it, because it might have salmonella. this country ha awesome birds of prey that eat meat, so i'll put if out for them maybe tomorrow morning.


i'm just so glad i didn't get arrested, because i had neither my phone or my passport on me. if i had been arrested my boss would never look the same way at me again. i would live in shame forever.

i don't want to go to any more concerts organized by those promoters, as i am too ashamed of myself. oh god i must have looked so disheveled and trampy with my red half-closed eye and i was probably stumbling.

oh and on the event invite of the concert on fb everyone is talking about how great the show was. i had been looking forward to this show for months and had learned the words to so many of their songs in russian.

oh yeah, also i had forgotten to eat yesterday.


i am saving that empty bottle of vodka, and keeping it in a prominent place  to remind me that it's possible for me to lose control. i think i'll feel better if i don't drink at all for a few weeks, and i have resolved that when i go to concerts in the future i will only bring enough money with me to only purchase nonalcoholic drinks or one drink.

i'm just glad my boss doesn't know and i still have a job. fuck. and there are no pics of my on fb looking that shitty. i am telling no one about this, i'm just going to pretend it never happened.

TIFU by drinking too much, getting kicked out of the bar, missing the group I had bought tickets a month in advance for, then on the way home getting kicked off of the metro, and then off of a bus by cops.