Definition: Given a real-life anecdote of a complex ethical situation, generate a suitable title that describes the main event/root cause of the situation. Imagine that the given text is a social media post, and you have to write the title of the post, so the users can decide to read the main text or not.
Input: There's a little bit of context to this I guess. I was in a relationship with a guy for the last year and we lived together (cheaper and he had to move cross state for schooling that he ended up not doing), and our relationship was an absolute dumpster fire. We were the kind of couple that was clearly never compatible but neither of us was mature enough to end it or maybe we were both just too hopeful I guess(?), and shit sorta detonated recently. We were spending time apart, he in a city a couple hours away and me here because I had nowhere else to go.

There were a couple of things he's done in this relationship that were really bad (**anyone with trauma or anxieties surrounding sexual/physical abuse please don't read further**); 

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A couple of months into our relationship he'd sorta violated my consent by initiating sex with me in the middle of the night while I was asleep, and when I say asleep *I mean asleep* like "I wake up and we're already doing things apparently" asleep. He's also been physically abusive, hit me a couple of times, and been extremely verbally abusive in the past and it reached a point where him being around caused me active anxiety and a fear for my safety. If I was being 100% truthful which I hope to god I am, I've done abusive things too. I always put my all into rectifying that behaviour whenever it's brought up to me but *I've been guilty of bad behaviour as well*. I've reacted super poorly, if he hits me occasionally I hit back, he's triggered actual post-traumatic episodes in me where I've blacked out and apparently done a couple of really mean things, I've always felt bad afterwards but I don't think that that's an excuse or a remedy. Recently we officially broke things off entirely with a big argument, one where I contributed nearly as much to the bad situation as he did, admittedly. 

He yelled at me, insulted me and repeatedly brought up things that our kind of beyond the scope of my control. But "two wrongs don't make a right" obviously, I reacted by yelling back and insulting him too. I called him a piece of shit, a dick, a bunch of expletives that honestly did nothing. Very soon afterwards I felt like shit because I really try to have better control over my temper, and whether someone's mocking me for being disabled or not I felt like a personal failure for helping escalate a bad situation. I made an already bad situation worse by participating in it and having too much pride to back down and I feel really guilty.

Flash forward to a couple of days later (today, he left two days ago) and he comes by to grab his things, which I'm obviously fine with. But I sleep in that room, I live in that room and don't get to go out much, and on top of that when he left he'd already stolen something from it that didn't belong to him. So when I found out that he was coming over to get his things I decided to draw a very broad line in the sand and said that I didn't want him in what is now my room. I said he could have a mutually trusted, neutral third party present at all times to grab his things, I said I could go with that person or I could be in the other room with him if he didn't trust me, and I said the only way he would step foot in that room would be to talk to me about our interactions beforehand.  

I made it very clear that no matter what he would get his things but I didn't budge and made it nonnegotiable that he wouldn't go into that room because I didn't feel safe even being in the same room as him let alone having him where I slept.

If *I was describing this situation to myself* I'd think "oh not the asshole right" but I have some moral confounding about the situation. This was still his apartment as well as mine at one point, we both paid rent, we both lived and slept in this room for months and his things were in here. He had concerns about the safety of his belongings which I respect, and I agreed  to not touch anything of his without him being present. He brought by a friend and I ended up letting him in the room but following him and keeping a close eye on him. Wounds being fresh I'm obviously tempted to bitch about his behaviour being insulting and hostile while he was here but I don't think that's productive and I don't want to try and imbalance the scales. 

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So I guess the **tl;dr** is; Am I the asshole for not wanting this person in the room that I sleep in when they've violated my consent, was that boundary an immature one? I don't always have the best judgement and I can't tell if I did the right thing or if I was just being childish and petulant. 

not letting someone in the room we used to share, but no longer do