Definition: Given a real-life anecdote of a complex ethical situation, generate a suitable title that describes the main event/root cause of the situation. Imagine that the given text is a social media post, and you have to write the title of the post, so the users can decide to read the main text or not.
Input: Backstory is needed. Don’t take the title at face value. It’s also worth noting everyone in this scenario are college students, i.e., not particularly wealthy. 

Two days ago, an acquaintance of mine was asking around for donations for a charity drive he’s participating in. Very actively asking around. He’d send Venmo requests immediately to anyone he spoke with, eventually running out of Venmo requests (I didn’t even know there was a limit on daily requests!) and just trying to convince people through word to donate. 

He gets to me, inevitably, while I’m doing some reading for a class, and goes through his whole donation routine. I tell him I don’t have any cash on me right now. He tells me to just Venmo him. I tell him I’ll bring some money tomorrow to donate, because I have some spare cash and change at home I’d much rather donate, since it’s been sitting on my dresser without use for a few months. He’s not at all happy with this answer, and pushes me a while longer to Venmo him, but eventually leaves me alone. 

So that night I go home, collect every spare dollar bill and quarter I have (eventually amounting to a decent donation sum) and stick it in a Ziploc bag so I can just hand it to him the next day without much hassle. 

The next day comes around. I’m back sitting in the same spot, doing reading again. He sits down about 10 feet away and starts eating lunch. I remember that I promised I’d donate to him, and that this might be the only time I see him that day, so I get the Ziploc out of my bag and get his attention. I pantomime throwing the bag for him to catch, and throw it towards him. Poorly. It ends up landing on the ground next to his table, because surprise surprise, throwing things in Ziploc bags isn’t particularly easy. 

He wasn’t happy about this. Not one bit. He immediately goes off: “Seriously dude? Did you just do that? Do you seriously not realize how disrespectful that is?”. This goes on for some time, and I’ve got a shit-eating grin on my face because I was certain he was joking. What was wrong with that? I was genuinely confused in the moment until it hit me he was totally serious. After his rant, he storms off for a good half hour to some undisclosed location, leaving all of his belongings and food just sitting at the table. 

I can understand that there exists a small number of situations that this would be totally disrespectful. If I didn’t know him whatsoever and threw money at him out of anger, yeah, that would be disrespectful. If he was begging on the street corner and I cared so little about him that I tossed money on the ground in front of him, that would be disrespectful. But no, this is a guy I’ve known for three years. Someone that less than a month ago, I was sandwiched next to trying to fit three people in the back of a car, and so we watched football on his phone during the drive. We’re certainly not best buds, but we’re casual with each other. And if he thinks it’s appropriate for him to bother me while I’m trying to read for a donation, I’d think it’s appropriate for me to try to toss him my donation when he didn’t seemingly want to come by me to grab it himself. 

Normally, I would do my best to talk to him and explain the situation, make him understand what I did wasn’t trying to insult him, but he’s been so unwilling to even look at me that I don’t think this is a bridge I need to bother to rebuild. 

So, and I the asshole for tossing him my donation? And am I the asshole for not caring enough to apologize?

tossing an acquaintance a charity donation