Definition: In this task, you are given a Reddit post as a text. Your task is to generate a title for this text. The title should start with "TIFU by", followed by a situation that caused humor. The title should contain 7-12 words, ideally.
Input: Text: so i'm laying on the couch, pretty hungover, 2 pm, and drinking a ton of coffee playing around on my laptop and realize that i'm absolutely starving. i felt like crap though so didn't want to leave my house, and decided that ordering a pizza would be a pretty good way to solve my problem. so i do. they tell me it'll take about an hour. 

about 30 minutes later i suddenly get really horny and figure fuck it, i'll hole up in my room and find some great porn and pull one off before pizza guy gets here. yeahhhhhh, turns out my wank sesh lasted a bit longer than anticipated, and i get a call saying that the pizza guy was here, so i throw on some pants and go grab the pizza.

firstly let me mention as a side note that watching porn while eating pizza isn't really the most satisfying combination. somehow it makes the pizza seem a little, i don't know..... dirty? lol anyway, basically i'm sitting in my computer chair next to my bed, which has the opened box of pizza on it, a slice of pizza in hand, watching porn. shortly after finishing the slice, i advance to the crescendo of my jerking frenzy, and jizz.

here's the thing. i usually don't shoot very far, but i must've not jerked for a few days and not realized how much was stored in my mansack, but no fucking shit, the first spurt shot like 3 fucking feet, right in the direction of the pizza box. 

so here i am, post jerk clarity settling in, looking around frantically on the floor and bed trying to locate where the stray dick-spittle ended up. it's nowhere to be seen. i eyeball the shit out of the pizza, but to no avail. i'd seen it though. i definitely saw a spurt of it fly right towards the pizza. it was on there. i guess it kind of soaked into the hot greasy mess somewhere and was no longer visible. i was still hungry damnit.

no way in hell i'm gonna waste a whole pizza though :d

TIFU by deciding to have a quick wank after ordering pizza.