Definition: In this task, you are given a Reddit post as a text. Your task is to generate a title for this text. The title should start with "TIFU by", followed by a situation that caused humor. The title should contain 7-12 words, ideally.
Input: Text: alright, guys, i got you a fresh one. well, some context. i'm gay. i grew up in the backwoods redneck, yeehaw, you're either a foreigner here or you're inbred kind of area.

my parents are very hardcore christians. i mean, you point these guys at a gay couple and you'll see a veritable flood of jesus-shirt-wearing, flag-waving motherfuckers swarm over them like they're indians and these people just killed their goddamn elephant and pissed on the corpse.

because i'm incapable of saying no, i'm currently living with my parents while good friends who are down on their luck have their family in my house.

i know, you came here immediately thinking "brb, x-posting to /r/titlegore". but i think now you're starting to see where this is going. if not, let me give you one more clue: these walls are thin. if you still don't get it, may god have mercy on your soul, because he sure didn't have any mercy when he was handing out the brains.

they had no idea.

there i am, it's 9pm, got my boytoy on the phone, we're chit-chatting, we're shooting the shit, joking around. i say something to the tune of "yeah, but if i wasn't a bitch you wouldn't love me."

i'm not thinking at this point. obviously. you know, i'm kind of surprised it took this long, i use google voice to forward phone calls from my place to here, and when he calls, google voice uses the same introduction clip every time. "you have a call from..." or something like that, and then there's a place for them to say their name. what did he say? "buttfucker". i'm getting massively (de?)railed here, but that's still sort of relevant.

anyway, he responds by saying "true...although i might still love you for that ass, if i got in it more often."

five seconds later, i immediately rememember...these walls. these fucking walls.

i have now barricaded the door to my bedroom, packed a suitcase, and have pre-unlocked the window to await morning. maybe they didn't hear. maybe. just in case, i'm going to be ready to gtfo. will update in the morning.

 

update: i don't think they heard. if they did, they're being silent for now...though there was much more activity on the 'convince me to go to their church on sunday' front.

TIFU by letting my boyfriend speakerphone