Definition: Given a real-life anecdote of a complex ethical situation, generate a suitable title that describes the main event/root cause of the situation. Imagine that the given text is a social media post, and you have to write the title of the post, so the users can decide to read the main text or not.
Input: I met this friend online 2 years ago, hit it off immediately like we were long lost sisters, I love her but we're the same person almost down to a T, both dealing with mental health issues as well as physical. We naturally bonded and talked almost everyday, got into a huge fight where I was admittedly the asshole for blowing up on her and a mutual friend, eventually we made up and last year we started talking again. My friend (who I'll call A for convenience) sometimes mentioned a guy, but we didn't talk about that too much since she's really reserved about her personal life, which I understand, but sometimes get a bit offended with since I'm super open about my personal problems (like I'm being now I guess). 

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One day her ex hit me up on twitter. I'd tweeted something about MBTI and he loves that thing so we talked the entire night about that. I mentioned her bc she also liked MBTI and he said he should send her his regards since they hadn't talked in a while and that he missed her, and I didn't think much of it (this will be relevant later). It appeared to me he was a bit flirty and I have to admit he ticked some of my boxes - he's incredibly well-spoken (which at my age is rare) and has a weird sense of humor, a bit of dad jokes mixed in with dark humor, not to mention liking some of my favorite movies and anime. It was a pleasant night of talking, nothing happened because I had an idea there'd been something going on between him and A and didn't want to stick my foot in that. Also I wasn't so incredibly attracted to him that I'd risk a friendship over that (well, guess what!)

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I was a bit conflicted and told our mutual friend that T (her ex) had hit me up and that I'd enjoyed talking to him. I asked if  I should tell A, since I didn't want to go behind her back, especially since we were on good terms now. My friend said I should say something just to get it off my mind, so I did. A has the weirdest reaction ever, like she was clapping at a really elaborate comedy shtick which just left me kind of dumbfounded. She laughed super hard about it and I decided to play along, told her that we didn't talk about much of anything. A asked if I'd mentioned her. I said yes, because of MBTI, and said he'd told me he missed her and was going to hit her up. She said that wasn't possible, since she'd blocked him a year ago... I just thought that was weird and didn't think much of it, but she kept talking about how manipulative he was and how he was such a disgusting person who ruined her life and manipulated her for years to his benefit. I was starting to lean toward him being an asshole. But then I kept talking to him and he was always super nice to me; a superficial kind of nice, but nice nonetheless. From a rational point of view, he hadn't done anything to me, so why should I hate him? 

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We kept talking but not for long. I guess the combination of A talking shit about him with me and him being aware that we knew each other and we talked made for a weird atmosphere. I don't regret it much, but I like being on good terms with people. We didn't stop talking because of what A said about him, just there wasn't much interest on my part (he kept replying to my instagram stories and complimenting me, so I guess he was a bit attracted but I can't say for sure). 

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Now, A was never open about what happened between them, despite my insistence. I insist because I don't want to hate someone just from what my friends say; while I understand sometimes they are right to be mad, I also think there are always two sides to the story, and so I'm usually skeptical, even when they tell me the whole story. I hate being unfair to people just because someone pretty much ordered me to, which is kind of what happened. She started to become increasingly paranoid about me and him, asking if we were talking much and what we were talking about. A bit of backstory: T and A had known each other for some 4 years I think and they dated for two weeks. They never met in real life, he was an asshole to her, pretty much manipulating a naive girl into sending him nudes and being there for him while he went around flirting with other girls. I KNOW he was shitty, which is why I didn't want to get very involved with him, but I also didn't want to be outright a bitch (or a white knight I guess). 

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So one day T says "hey we need to talk", and I get a bit scared. He says I probably know that it's about A. He tells me he tried to talk to her, which I know because she showed me: he was super casual saying he missed her and she basically told him to fuck off and that she never wants him in her life again, saying how after they broke up he'd hit on her best friend and now he was doing the same thing to me just to get to her. Well, I don't want to be the one to say it but IT DID GET TO HER. I sent a print of the "hey we need to talk" bit to the group chat I had with A and our mutual friend. I had stuff to do so didn't deliver (also bc I was nervous about A's reaction since he'd pretty much trash talked her to me after the initial message). A asked "where's the rest? can you send the prints?" and I kept postponing it until she lost it and pretty much bullied me into showing her the convo. I said I didn't want to because it was going to hurt her, and she said she had the right to be hurt. I almost had a panic attack bc she wouldn't stop blowing up my phone. Before you say it, yes I know I messed up here and it was natural that she wanted to see the prints, but I told her what he'd said in them (albeit in a much nicer way since T was really a bitch to her). She wouldn't stop pressuring me to give her the damn convo, so I said fuck it, if you want to let your ex who you dated for 2 weeks affect you this much then be my fucking guest. Btw I tried to defend her in the prints, saying I understood why she blocked him and didn't want to talk to him. I wasn't SUPER WHITE KNIGHTE-Y about it, because I wanted to hear his side. Yes, the side of an abuser, I know I know. So after she saw the prints she said she didn't want to talk to me again about T or anything for a while and left the group chat. I didn't go after her, but I went into a panic that night, talking to my best friends trying to understand what exactly had happened. She usually insisted I show her my convos with him, meanwhile I never showed him any convos with her... Because he just didn't care. Now if you ask me, A has a great boyfriend now so I really don't understand how this affects her so much. I've also never had a boyfriend, but I have talked to my share of almost-boyfriends online, so I know how to spot a manipulative asshole and cut them right off. A didn't and she suffered for it. I suffered the first time, then I learned to get over it. 

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To sum up, A tried to talk to me again for a while, but I accidentally mentioned his name twice and she said she couldn't do it anymore so she left mid-conversation. I think she overreacted a lot, especially for someone who seemed to be so close to me. Btw I haven't talked to T since November when all of this stuff happened. Now I know how much of an asshole he is, but only because another friend who knew him told me since she wouldn't open up about it. A wished me a merry xmas to which I replied "merry xmas to you too, but when are you going to reply to me?". Took her some 10 days to reiterate that she was offended and couldn't understand how I could do that to her, and that maybe we really weren't compatible after all. She might be right...

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So, reddit, am I the asshole for not taking her at her word and talking to him regardless? (Or also, am I the asshole for taking printscreens and posting them to the group chat? Actually I am, and I know that one, so don't mention it, I've learned my lesson.)

talking to my friend's "ex" despite her warnings and consequently ruining our friendship over it