Definition: Given a real-life anecdote of a complex ethical situation, generate a suitable title that describes the main event/root cause of the situation. Imagine that the given text is a social media post, and you have to write the title of the post, so the users can decide to read the main text or not.
Input: So I’m 23, and 40 weeks pregnant with a sweet little girl. Her dad and I were together for two years, and split when I found out I was pregnant. He REALLY did not want me to keep this baby. We grew up in the same hometown but never really talked until we were both a few years out of high school and in the military. I’m stationed in GA and he is in VA, in different branches. We have had almost zero contact my entire pregnancy, since it’s normally just him saying everything under the sun to make me upset and cry. 

His family knows about the baby (he didn’t tell them, I had to when I was about 6 1/2 months along) and they are kind enough to call a couple times a week and see how I’m feeling and just make sure I’m okay. 

He doesn’t want to be on the birth certificate, he won’t let me give her his last name (both things I want for her, but if he doesn’t sign a paternity acknowledgment, I have no choice) he doesn’t want me to file for child support either. He doesn’t want any record of this child near his name. I know I can still file without his permission, and a paternity test will be done, and it will all happen anyways. 

He wants to just give me money every month, which I trust he will do since we are both military and his career is EXTREMELY important to him. After talking to his family today, I feel awful about the amount we settled on. We settled on $600 a month, which will only cover daycare and I’m paying for everything else for her. He hasn’t helped with any of the baby gear, clothes, diapers, etc. His family thinks he should only be responsible for helping with half of daycare, which will stretch my budget extremely thin. 

Mind you, he has no bills, family pays his truck and insurance, he pays about $300 for rent in his buddies house, and he has probably $100,000 in savings. If I agree to that $300 a month I will never be able to establish any sort of savings, and always be on thin ice, while he is still rolling in money and no responsibilities. 

My fear is if we go to court, the amount they come up with for him to pay will be similar to that $300 since I “technically” make more than he does because I am one rank higher. (Obviously that’s just how it will be and I’ll have to get over it) I actually have to pay rent, utilities, a car note, insurance, a cell phone bill, and support our daughter. He is deploying soon after she is born, and he has a very high risk career, so I do worry something will  happen to him and it will be as though our daughter never existed on his end.

Am I the asshole for not respecting his wishes and wanting to file for paternity/child support?

wanting to establish paternity even though he doesn't want to