 [ Symptoms ] i have not engaged in sex for seven plus years  now i am having difficulty with my partner inserting what do i do [ Disease ] it is hard to know without talking to a doctor but here are some things to investigate that may help you find your answer do you use latex condoms if so try some polyurethane ones does she feel pain when stretched with fingers or a sex toy if not it might be nervousness shame or fear about sex that is causing the issue and relaxation exercises might help does she have sensitivity to a certain kind of lube if she is shy could she subconsciously be feeling the pain because she feels she should not enjoy sex until you find your answer there are plenty of non penetrative sex options that you both can enjoy hands mouths soft places on the body and toys provide nearly unlimited options for fun