text: [Themes: Humor]
  
  > go downwards
  A small shadow blocks out the sun for a minute. That crazy robot has jumped out of the plane as well, following you! Soon it has caught up with you. You feel rather safe, though.
  
  > look
  So much blue...
  
  The robot is tumbling down towards Earth besides you.
  
  > examine the Robot
  Falling towards Earth next to you, its propeller harmlessly slicing the air, the mechanical underbelly of the beast is exposed.
  You notice a small hatch.
  
  > look at the hatch
  A small, metal hatch, and a keypad besides it. A sticker reads: "CONTAINS PARACHUTE. In case you're robot mindlessly chases rodents or other critters into dangerous territory. Will be deployed automatically at a height of 5000 ft. Enter 4-digit PIN-code to open manually. Please don't use a number that's easily guessable."
  
  > Type 1234
  The keypad just beeps.
  
  There is no keypad here.
  
  > Type 2014
  The keypad just beeps.
  
  There is no keypad here.
  
  The keypad just beeps.
  
  There is no keypad here.
  
  > look at the keypad
  Numbers from 0-9, the usual stick.
  
  > Type 0001
  That was easy!
  The hatch swings open.
  
  > look in the hatch
  In the hatch is a small parachute.
  
  > take the parachute
  You take the parachute.
  
  > wear it
  You put on the small parachute.
  
  > take the parachute
  You already have that.
  
  > look at it
  It's adorable! It has small shoulder straps and everything, and the tiniest pullcord.
  
  > pull the pullcord
  *flop*
  The parachute opens and you beging slowly drifting towards the ground, while the robot becomes a smaller and smaller speck below. After some time, you land.
  But what now? The plane gets smaller and smaller, as it flies away high above you. You have no way to find out what they're doing to Paul and all your other friends, being just a small rat stranded somewhere in the middle of nowhere. Looks like there's nothing but wallow in self-pity for months now.
  
  Some generic farmland.
  
  > Go north
  Ah, but what's the use?
  
  > Inventory
  You are carrying:
  a small parachute (being worn)
  
  > remove parachute
  You take off the small parachute.
  
  > drop it
  Dropped.
  
  > think
  What a good idea.
  
  > Sleep
  Though this rat, like any good pet, can fall asleep at any time, you don't feel this is a good time to do so. Maybe later.
  
  > look
  Some generic farmland.
  
  You can see a small parachute here.
  
  > Go north
  (first opening front door)
  Uh oh! There is a cat flap. You slip through it, hoping for the best.
  
  A small hallway, brightly lit by a row of Alien Tech(tm) powered neon lights. Dark wooden stairs lead upwards, and a doorframe opens east into the Living Room. A small door under the stairs lead into a storage closet. (Referred to by Paul only as "The Potter Room".)
  
  You can see a chest of drawers (closed) here.
  
  > go east
  This is a spacious, cool room. It once was busy and always kinda untidy. Now, all that's left of the furniture are the two couches, covered in white plastic wrapping.
  A door leads south to the kitchen.
  
  A cloning machine sits in a corner.
  
  An opened letter lies forgotten on the floor.
  
  > read the letter
  Dear Dr. Elbe,
  we here at HAM are sad to inform you that your delivery for
  Time machine parts
  by drone has failed. It seems our delivery drone was shot down by the Air Force somewhere over Spielertor National Park. We can reattempt delivery of a new copy in 2-3 years.
  Has this answered your question, please leave a rating etc.
  
  > examine machine
  You saw a similiar one on Mercury. It has one human-sized vat and an input slot. The only other feature is a big, red lever labelled "CLONE".
  
  > Examine slot
  Looks like it's meant to contain a very small sample of DNA.
  
  > go south
  You were beginning to wonder where all the Sharkmen guards were. Looks like they're sitting around the kitchen table, eating and chatting. Better leave them alone.
  
  > Go west
  A small hallway, brightly lit by a row of Alien Tech(tm) powered neon lights. Dark wooden stairs lead upwards, and a doorframe opens east into the Living Room. A small door under the stairs lead into a storage closet. (Referred to by Paul only as "The Potter Room".)
  
  You can see a chest of drawers (closed) here.
  
  > Up
  Oof! You'd need to be a lot fitter to even try that.
  
  > look at the small door
  A small wooden door. It's slightly ajar.
  
  > enter door
  Which do you mean, front door or the small door?
  
  > Inside
  Good thing the door to the Potter room was slightly ajar.
  
  Shelves are nailed to the leaning wall.
  
  In a corner stands a box labelled "Alex' things". That gives you a little pang. You almost forgot Paul thought you were dead for quite a while.
  
  > look at the box
  In the box are a razor, a cardboard tube, a key and a wedding ring.
  
  > examine the razor
  Hey, it's your old, uh, body razor. Unfortunately, it's quite dull and no use as this game's cutting thing.
  
  On the razor is a hair.
  
  > examine tube
  A simple cardboard tube, open on one end. Seems pretty useless. (So it probably isn't).
  
  > look at the key
  Paul gave this to you for one of your birthdays. While he doesn't condone your habit of stealing and destroying golf carts from the course next door, he shows support. It's a skeleton key, that can open 95% of all golf carts in the world, and you've tried at least 34 models so far.
  
  > examine the ring
  It's a simple and golden.
  
  > get the hair
  Taken.
  
  > Leave
  A small hallway, brightly lit by a row of Alien Tech(tm) powered neon lights. Dark wooden stairs lead upwards, and a doorframe opens east into the Living Room. A small door under the stairs lead into a storage closet. (Referred to by Paul only as "The Potter Room".)
  
  You can see a chest of drawers (closed) here.
  
  > look at hair
  Judging from color and length is defintetely one of yours.
  
  > put the hair in the slot
  Ellison put the hair into the slot.
  
  > look at the cloning machine
  You saw a similiar one on Mercury. It has one human-sized vat and an input slot. The only other feature is a big, red lever labelled "CLONE".
  
  > pull the lever
  The machines makes some weird, gurgling noises, then it hisses and the vat fills with green smoke. The smokes gets thicker and thicker. For a few seconds, nothing happens, then the machine goes *ding!*, the vat opens and a figure emerges.
  
  > look at the figure
  This is Alex, lovable sociopath. Well, a clone. For fear of offending any sensibilites, the clone emerged fully clothed from the vat.
  
  > Sleep
  You quickly fall asleep.
  
  This is a spacious, cool room. It once was busy and always kinda untidy. Now, all that's left of the furniture are the two couches, covered in white plastic wrapping.
  A door leads south to the kitchen.
  
  A cloning machine sits in a corner.
  
  An opened letter lies forgotten on the floor.
  
  You can also see Ellison here.
  
  Awesome! Finally, after a game spent either death or in some ridiculous form, you're back in a copy of your own body. As an added bonus, this clone body is like 10 years younger than you were. You quickly check it's extremities and find them complete, in the right place and of expected length.
  
  > talk to Alex
  You says something really important.
  
  > get the letter
  You better let him rest a spell. He's earned a rest.
  
  Taken.
  
  > read it
  Dear Dr. Elbe,
  we here at HAM are sad to inform you that your delivery for
  Time machine parts
  by drone has failed. It seems our delivery drone was shot down by the Air Force somewhere over Spielertor National Park. We can reattempt delivery of a new copy in 2-3 years.
  Has this answered your question, please leave a rating etc.
  
  > Open chest
  You open the chest of drawers, revealing a bottle and The Arabian Nights: Tales of 1001 Nights.
  
  > examine bottle
  A cute retro bottle that once contained some hand lotion. It's made of glass and has a plastic stopper. Also a pirate on the label. Not sure what connects pirates and hand lotions, but when you told Paul this, he just scoffed "That's why you're not in marketing, dear."
  
  > examine arabian Nights
  Paul's Penguin edition copy of this timeless classic.
  
  > take all from the chest
  bottle: Taken.
  The Arabian Nights: Tales of 1001 Nights: Taken.
  
  > check your inventory
  You are carrying:
  The Arabian Nights: Tales of 1001 Nights
  a bottle (closed)
  a letter
  
  > Go inside
  Shelves are nailed to the leaning wall.
  
  In a corner stands a box labelled "Alex' things". That gives you a little pang. You almost forgot Paul thought you were dead for quite a while.
  
  > get the ring and the tube
  wedding ring: Taken.
  cardboard tube: Taken.
  
  > look in the box
  In the box are a razor and a key.
  
  > wear the ring
  You put on the wedding ring.
  
  > take the key
  Taken.
  
  > Go outside
  A small hallway, brightly lit by a row of Alien Tech(tm) powered neon lights. Dark wooden stairs lead upwards, and a doorframe opens east into the Living Room. A small door under the stairs lead into a storage closet. (Referred to by Paul only as "The Potter Room".)
  
  You can see a chest of drawers (empty) here.
  
  > Up
  This is  a small hallway, with a lot of doors. They're all unimportant (and therefor not implemented), except the one to the east.
  
  Holy Moses! Uncle Wallys ghost floats around here.
  
  > examine the uncle
  The acid bath he took in the last game hasn't done much for his complexion. He looks like a Dali painting of his former self, wearing a half-burnt Stalin jacket, and his skin has the color of something you find on the sole of your shoe after a night around town. He still seems to be a ghost, though.
  
  > talk to the uncle
  "ALEX! My favorite arse bandit!"
  "Have I ever told you I'm not the least bit sorry I pushed you into that acid bath?"
  
  > talk to the uncle
  "The Queen of Hearts and Marmalades has hired you?"
  "She's actually called "The Queen of Hurts and Maladies". Women and their fancy names, eh?"
  "Have I ever told you I'm not the least bit sorry I pushed you into that acid bath?"
  
  > talk to the uncle
  "Can you let me in?`"
  "Are you proposing me or ..."
  You just roll your eyes. "Have I ever told you I'm not the least bit sorry I pushed you into that acid bath?"
  
  > Keep going
  "What are you doing here anyway? The last time I saw you was in hell!"
  
  > go east
  Uncle Wally blocks your way and menacingly flings some ectoplasm at you. "Don't make me grill you, son."
  
  > Unclewally
  SAVEOk.
  
  > open the bottle
  You open the bottle.
  
  > read arabian Nights
  You flip through it. This isn't like a Ray Harryhausen movie at all.
  
  > look in the bottle
  The bottle is empty.
  
  > put Wally in the bottle
  (first taking Uncle Wally)
  I don't suppose Uncle Wally would care for that.
  
  > show the book to Wally
  Uncle Wally is unimpressed.
  
  > give the book to Wally
  Wally refuses the book with a raised hand. "Reading classics? Please, that's for people who studied to work at McDonalds."
  
  > Rub bottle
  You give the bottle another good shake and you can faintly hear Wally's pathetic protestations. Teehee.
  
  > open the bottle
  That's already open.
  
  > ask Wally about the bottle
  "You wouldn't understand. The Queen uses Quantum mechanics. Ever heard of the Lampshade effect?"
  
  > ask Wally about the genie
  "Please let me in. We humans need to stick together."
  "Please, I'm at least one step above you on the evolutionary ladder."
  
  > show the bottle to Wally
  "Hey, Wallster, I bet your inflated ego doesn't fit in here!"
  Wally grabs the open bottle and peers at it intently.
  "You must think I'm a total moron."
  Well, shit.
  "Of course I know that ghosts don't have mass, so I can do this easily."
  And with a *plop* he disappears into the bottle.
  You quickly ram home the stopper with the flat of your hand.
  "Hey" says Uncle Wally very faintly. "Good joke, but, let me out, okay? I just got this job." You give the bottle a good shake and that shuts him up.
  
  > look
  This is  a small hallway, with a lot of doors. They're all unimportant (and therefor not implemented), except the one to the east.
  
  > go east
  You kick the bedroom door and it crashes open. (It wasn't really locked). Paul jumps up from the bed with a shriek. He looks thinner, bestubbled, his hair dyed some time ago but the roots are showing. He blinks and then jumps into your arms. You hold him for some precious moments, emotions swirling in you that you are too manly to express. Video games have told you well.
  "You have your body back! You have to tell me all about it!"
  "No time, there will be a flashback later."
  "Later?"
  "Earlier for me, er, the player, er, nevermind. We've gotta get out of here."
  "Not so fast, we need to save Dr. Elbe."
  "The famous temperologist? Where is he?"
  "Actually, she goes by Dana these days. But that's not important. She climbed out the window to attack the Sharkmen while they are having dinner in the kitchen."
  "Attack? With what?"
  "I told her of your secret weapons stash in the undergrow. Anyway, we need to help her. C'mon, >CLIMB OUT WINDOW." He slaps you on the ass and makes shooing motions with his hands.
  "What about you?"
  "I'm staying here. You know I hate guns."
  You nod and grab his head and kiss him gently.
  "See you soon. Don't die on me again."
  "You wish. Oh here."
  It's a bit late for a Christmas present, but here's your uncle."
  Paul looks at the bottle and whistles.
  Then you >JUMP OUT WINDOW.
  
  Paul's parents loved this garden, and so do you. It's sorrounded on three sides by walls overgrown by undergrowth, so as to hide the family members going for a seamelss tan.This wasn't necessary for the southern wall, wich is quite high, because it borders on a Golf course (Pauls told you they find the occasional golf ball in the pool nonetheless). It seems that the Pool has been drained some time ago.
  
  The silhouettes of Sharkmen move through the fog.
  Also, you once again don't feel safe.
  
  Dr. Elbe kneels behind the barricade, aiming the M60 at the advancing Sharkmen.
  
  Your most prized possession, an original Colt Army Model 1860 lies beside Dr. Elbe.
  
  A ginger cat lies on one of the reamining deck chairs, watching the proceedings with weary disinterest.
  
  Now your deck-chairs have been piled up to make a barricade. Behind it, Dr. Elbe, in a tasteful yet practical summer dress kneels, reloading your M60 machine gun. She expertly feeds the belt of 7.62 mm NATO cartridges ( or .308 Winchester) into it, and you notice that she uses your M122 tripod.
  As you scramble to your feet, you notice a huge wall of smoke from the huge glass doors that lead inside, to the kitchen.
  You quickly jump behind the barricade for cover.
  
  > take Colt
  You can tell from the weight that it's still loaded with 4 paper cartridges you made yourself.
  
  Taken.
  
  > look
  Garden Area (behind the barricade)
  Paul's parents loved this garden, and so do you. It's sorrounded on three sides by walls overgrown by undergrowth, so as to hide the family members going for a seamelss tan.This wasn't necessary for the southern wall, wich is quite high, because it borders on a Golf course (Pauls told you they find the occasional golf ball in the pool nonetheless). It seems that the Pool has been drained some time ago.
  
  The silhouettes of Sharkmen move through the fog.
  Also, you once again don't feel safe.
  
  Dr. Elbe kneels behind the barricade, aiming the M60 at the advancing Sharkmen.
  
  A ginger cat lies on one of the reamining deck chairs, watching the proceedings with weary disinterest.
  
  > talk to Elbe
  "Hey, Dr. Elbe. I'm Alex."
  "Hey, Alex" she says, shooting you a sideways grin, "please, call me Dana." She squeezes her eyes and shoots of a few rounds, dropping one of the shapes in the fog. "Pleased to meet you."
  
  While Dr. Elbe is busy on the right side of the garden, a Sharkman jumps through the fog to the left. He has a M16 in his hands and fires at you!
  
  > shoot Sharkman
  BANG!
  The Sharkman throws up his hands and drops dead!
  
  > talk to Elbe
  "What do we do now?"
  "I say we wait for Paul to make a run for it, then get away through the golf course."
  
  > shoot Fog
  You don't want to shoot Fog.
  
  While Dr. Elbe is busy on the right side of the garden, a Sharkman jumps through the fog to the left. He has a Uzi in his hands and fires at you!
  
  > shoot Sharkman
  BANG!
  The Sharkman clutches his chest and keels over!
  
  > talk to Elbe
  "And then what?"
  "I have a plan how we can save Earth from the oppression of the Sharkmen."
  
  > talk to Elbe
  "Does it involve time travel?"
  "Uh...yes?"
  "Cool!"
  
  While Dr. Elbe is busy on the right side of the garden, a Sharkman jumps through the fog to the left. He has a Ak47 in his hands and fires at you!
  
  > shoot Sharkman
  BANG!
  The Sharkman spins on his heel and drops to the ground!
  
  > talk to Elbe
  "What is taking your husband so long?"
  "Maybe he's just a little scared. He's really not cut out for all this violence."
  
  > talk to Elbe
  "Oh yeah, he, um, actually told me you died? Was that, like, a metaphorical thing or...?"
  "No, much more mundane. A light grue threw me into a chasm on Mercury."
  
  While Dr. Elbe is busy on the right side of the garden, a Sharkman jumps through the fog to the left. He has two Colt 1911 in his hands and fires at you!
  
  > shoot Sharkman
  BANG!
  The Sharkman falls on his knees and then falls face forward!
  
  > talk to Elbe
  "Well, I see you got better."
  "Yeah, I can actually possess people and stuff? I'm not yet clear how it works, it's like God or someone makes up the rules and changes them as he goes along."
  
  > talk to Elbe
  "Why is your face so red, Dana?"
  "Laser therapy. Beard removal."
  "That must suck."
  "Yeah, it does."
  
  While Dr. Elbe is busy on the right side of the garden, a Sharkman jumps through the fog to the left. He has a knife in his hands and runs towards you!
  
  > shoot Sharkman
  You're out of ammo.
  
  > kill Sharkman
  Violence isn't the answer to this one.
  
  Oh no! The Sharkman jumps over the barricade and lands on top of you. You try to hit him with the Colt, but he slaps it out of your hand and it skiddles away. Can you raise your hand quick enough to block his blow? Quickly, press B.
  
  > B.
  You manage to raise your arms and block the Sharkman's locked wrists. But the knife is still coming downwards slowly! Quick, press A.
  
  > R.
  The sharkman pushes your flailing hands away with both hands and rises the knife again! O.M.G.! QUICK, press T.
  
  > T
  You roll towards the side and throw the Sharkman off balance. He impales himself on his own knife and ... uh, has to go to the hospital, where he eats lots of ice cream!
  You push the corpse off you, and through the smoke you see Paul's extended hand. He helps you up. Elbe is still firing at more and more Sharkmen coming through the doors. Man, your kitchen must look like shit.
  "Quick!" she shouts. "Get over the wall!"
  "Quick, Paul, I'll boost you." You stare at his ass a little more than necessary as you help your husband onto the wall. He extends his hand to you. "Quick, Alex, get up here."
  You look back at Elbe, who provides more and more desperate covering fire.
  "It's noble she's sacrifing herself, but I don't feel comfortable with such a clichéd end for a minority character."
  "Sacrifice myself? Are you crazy? Cover me from up there, you dick." With that she tosses you the M60.
  
  Your lying on the wall between your garden and the golf course.
  
  A few Sharkmen are advancing while firing wildly at the wall. Bullets chip the stone here and there.
  
  Hey, there is a penny up here! You never noticed.
  
  > shoot Sharkmen
  You squeeze the trigger. Dang! Damn thing is jammed! Better clear it.
  
  Elbe breaks away from the barricade and runs towards the wall. Behind her, Sharkmen advance in formation over their fallen comrades, firing wildly.
  
  > Clear gun
  You pry the stuck shell out of the barrel with the cleaning rod and the next round chambers with a *clack*.
  
  > shoot Sharkmen
  You get a good foothold on the wall to shoot it, even with foregrip. Better unfold the tripod.
  
  Dr. Elbe begins to climb the wall, somewhat hindered by the bullets hitting the wall around her and by her flowing dress.
  
  > Unfold tripod
  You unfold the tripod and try to find a good place on the wall to put it.
  
  > shoot Sharkmen
  You get a good foothold on the wall to shoot it, even with foregrip. Better unfold the tripod.
  
  Dr. Elbe looks at you angrily.
  "Uh, how about that covering fire?"
  "Damn thing was ..."
  A tracer sizzles overhead so close it nearly sets your hair on fire. "Hey!" shouts Paul, "I'm all for addressing problems directly, but how about COMING THE FUCK DOWN HERE first?"
  Dr. Elbe nods and scurries down into the Golf course, with you close behind.
  
  You are at the foot of a small, sloping hill, the lawn neatly cut. You can go eastwards, uphill. The wall of your garden is here.
  
  Dr. Elbe stands around here, eyes alert.
  
  Paul stands around, smiling at you affectionately.
  
  > go east
  You are on top of one of the innumberable hills of the golf course. You can see the whole golf course around you, which is boring as hell. The only interesting part seems to be one of the entrance gates to the northeast. West is the wall to your garden.
  
  You can see a golf cart (closed) here.
  
  Paul trudges along.
  
  Elbe follows you.
  
  > unlock the cart with the key
  You unlock the golf cart.
  
  > open the cart
  You open the golf cart.
  
  > enter the golf cart
  You get into the golf cart.
  
  Paul shu-shus at you. "Scoot over, you're driving all the time."
  "All the time? I've been death for a while."
  Nevertheless, you slide over on the passager seat.
  
  Dr. Elbe climbs onto the backseat and grabs the M60 from your hands. She quickly unfolds the tripod and installs the machine gun on the rear end of the car. "Okay, ready."
  Cool, looks like you don't have to do anything.
  
  > wait
  Time passes.
  
  Paul goes northeast in the golf cart, taking you along.
  
  Entrance Gate (in the golf cart)
  A metal gate bars the way out to a lovely country lane.
  Oh wait, that's what this usually looks like. Now you look closer for the first time in years and realize there's a cemetery on the other site of the road. The way back is sw. I mean southwest.
  
  Dr. Elbe is on the backseat, at the M60.
  
  Paul drives the golf cart.
  
  > wait awhile
  Time passes.
  
  > Go outside
  Hello no! This thing is doing a breakneck 30 mph.
  
  You drive past the cemetery and Paul expertly does a handbrake turn to the right. The cemetery passes to the left, and you have the conversation from the intro.
  
  Paul goes northeast in the golf cart, taking you along.
  
  Country Road (in the golf cart)
  Spielertor is one of the oldest National Parks in the state, which you can easily tell from the forest.
  
  Dr. Elbe is on the backseat, at the M60.
  
  Paul drives the golf cart.
  
  > Wait
  Time passes.
  
  What was a black shape down the road a second before turns into tank that's gaining on you very fast. Elbe starts firing the M60, with little effect.
  "Damn, Alex" cries Paul, "do something!"
  
  Paul goes northeast in the golf cart, taking you along.
  
  Forest (in the golf cart)
  This is a forest, with trees in all directions. To the east, there appears to be sunlight.
  
  Dr. Elbe is firing at the tank. Bullets riochet off the armor uselessly. Still, she seems to have fun.
  
  Paul drives the golf cart.
  
  The tank is chasing you!
  
  > throw the tube at the tank
  Futile.
  
  > Examine tank
  It's black and huge, bulky yet sleek. Luckily, they can't get you with their gun turret, but a dude with an Assault Rifle (seems to be an update model of the M16) fires at the cart from behind a manhole cover.
  
  > shoot the manhole cover
  "I'd like to help, Doc, but I'm unarmed. Got any of my stash left?" "Sorry, no, but I can give you this."
  She throws you something that is either a very big laser pointer or a very small flashlight.
  "Oh, is this a laser gun?"
  "No."
  "A lightsaber?"
  "Unfortunately, also no."
  "So, what is it?"
  "It's a very powerful laser. Not powerful enough to hurt anyone-" "Aww"
  "-but you could use it as a, you know, laser pointer."
  "I'll keep that in mind when I want to PowerPoint (tm) them to death."
  
  Paul swerves over the road wildly, trying to avoid the gunner's fire. "Dr. Elbe! Get that guy!"
  "He's too well protected. This looks like a job for the protagonist." "Just give me the g..."
  But just at that moment something terrible breaks through the dense foliage. It's a quadruple human, ridden by a Horseman. That's the most horrible thing you ever saw, at least since Paul had that herpes problem.
  
  Paul goes northeast in the golf cart, taking you along.
  
  Forest (in the golf cart)
  This is a path winding through a dimly lit forest. The path heads north-south here. One particularly large tree with some low branches stands at the edge of the path.
  
  Dr. Elbe is firing at the tank. Bullets riochet off the armor uselessly. Still, she seems to have fun.
  
  Paul drives the golf cart.
  
  The tank is chasing you!
  
  The Horseman rides the Manhorse very closely alongside the cart, in hot pursuit.
  
  > point the laser at dude
  That may look interesting, but does nothing.
  
  Paul goes northeast in the golf cart, taking you along.
  
  Clearing (in the golf cart)
  You are in a clearing, with a forest surrounding you on all sides. A path leads south. On the ground is a pile of leaves.
  
  Dr. Elbe is firing at the tank. Bullets riochet off the armor uselessly. Still, she seems to have fun.
  
  Paul drives the golf cart.
  
  The tank is chasing you!
  
  The Horseman rides the Manhorse very closely alongside the cart, in hot pursuit.
  
  > talk to Elbe
  "Sorry, Alex, would love to chat but it's hard to do it over the exchange of gunfire between us and the"
  RATATATATATATATA BOOM BOOM BOOM
  "I get your point."
  
  > jump on Manhorse
  You lean out of the cart, grabbing the roof with one hand.
  "What are you doing?" screams Paul.
  "We need to stop-"
  "Don't say horsing around!"
  "Okay." And then you jump.
  After some dramatic scrambling, you sit in the saddle behind the confused Horseman.
  
  Clearing (on Manhorse)
  You are in a clearing, with a forest surrounding you on all sides. A path leads south. On the ground is a pile of leaves.
  
  A tank is chasing you, and a guy with an assault rifle fires at the golf cart.
  
  You can also see a golf cart (in which are Dr. Elbe and Paul) here.
  
  A horseman sits before you.
  
  Paul goes northeast in the golf cart.
  
  The tank is chasing you!
  
  The Horseman rides the Manhorse very closely alongside the cart, in hot pursuit.
  
  > point the laser at the dude
  That may look interesting, but does nothing.
  
  Paul goes northeast in the golf cart.
  
  The tank is chasing you!
  
  Manhorse rides very closely alongside the cart, in hot pursuit.
  
  > examine dude
  A sharkman with an assault rifle!
  
  > look at Manhorse
  The Manhorse is as a big horse, but looks like a man! Surprisingly, he manages to keep up with the cart. One of the saddlebags is marked with some writing.
  
  >READ WRITING
  
  It says "DANGER! EXPLOSIVE."
  
  Paul goes northeast in the golf cart.
  
  The tank is chasing you!
  
  Manhorse rides very closely alongside the cart, in hot pursuit.
  
  > take the saddlebag
  That's hardly portable.
  
  > Light saddlebag
  This dangerous act would achieve little.
  
  Y'all arrive at a nice fire tower, and at a glance you see the package for Elbe on the floor, but there is no room for you to go, and the tank runs over the golf cart with a terrifying crunch (everyone escapes unharmed).
  
  > wait awhile
  Time passes.
  
  You drive past the cemetery and Paul expertly does a handbrake turn to the right. The cemetery passes to the left, and you have the conversation from the intro.
  
  Paul goes northeast in the golf cart, taking you along.
  
  Country Road (in the golf cart)
  Spielertor is one of the oldest National Parks in the state, which you can easily tell from the forest.
  
  Dr. Elbe is on the backseat, at the M60.
  
  Paul drives the golf cart.
  
  > Wait
  "I'd like to help, Doc, but I'm unarmed. Got any of my stash left?" "Sorry, no, but I can give you this."
  She throws you something that is either a very big laser pointer or a very small flashlight.
  "Oh, is this a laser gun?"
  "No."
  "A lightsaber?"
  "Unfortunately, also no."
  "So, what is it?"
  "It's a very powerful laser. Not powerful enough to hurt anyone-" "Aww"
  "-but you could use it as a, you know, laser pointer."
  "I'll keep that in mind when I want to PowerPoint (tm) them to death."
  
  What was a black shape down the road a second before turns into tank that's gaining on you very fast. Elbe starts firing the M60, with little effect.
  "Damn, Alex" cries Paul, "do something!"
  
  Paul goes northeast in the golf cart, taking you along.
  
  Forest (in the golf cart)
  This is a forest, with trees in all directions. To the east, there appears to be sunlight.
  
  Dr. Elbe is firing at the tank. Bullets riochet off the armor uselessly. Still, she seems to have fun.
  
  Paul drives the golf cart.
  
  The tank is chasing you!
  
  Time passes.
  
  > wait
  Time passes.
  
  Paul swerves over the road wildly, trying to avoid the gunner's fire. "Dr. Elbe! Get that guy!"
  "He's too well protected. This looks like a job for the protagonist." "Just give me the g..."
  But just at that moment something terrible breaks through the dense foliage. It's a quadruple human, ridden by a Horseman. That's the most horrible thing you ever saw, at least since Paul had that herpes problem.
  
  Paul goes northeast in the golf cart, taking you along.
  
  Forest (in the golf cart)
  This is a path winding through a dimly lit forest. The path heads north-south here. One particularly large tree with some low branches stands at the edge of the path.
  
  Dr. Elbe is firing at the tank. Bullets riochet off the armor uselessly. Still, she seems to have fun.
  
  Paul drives the golf cart.
  
  The tank is chasing you!
  
  The Horseman rides the Manhorse very closely alongside the cart, in hot pursuit.
  
  > jump
  You jump on the spot.
  
  > jump on Manhorse
  You lean out of the cart, grabbing the roof with one hand.
  "What are you doing?" screams Paul.
  "We need to stop-"
  "Don't say horsing around!"
  "Okay." And then you jump.
  After some dramatic scrambling, you sit in the saddle behind the confused Horseman.
  
  Forest (on Manhorse)
  This is a path winding through a dimly lit forest. The path heads north-south here. One particularly large tree with some low branches stands at the edge of the path.
  
  A tank is chasing you, and a guy with an assault rifle fires at the golf cart.
  
  You can also see a golf cart (in which are Dr. Elbe and Paul) here.
  
  A horseman sits before you.
  
  > search the Saddlebag
  In Saddlebag is rocket grenade.
  
  Paul goes northeast in the golf cart.
  
  The tank is chasing you!
  
  The Horseman rides the Manhorse very closely alongside the cart, in hot pursuit.
  
  > look at the rocket grenade
  It's a neat little Mahavira-Arnaud rocket grenade. You can either fire it from a rocket launcher, even an improvised one, or throw it. In either case you should first you  hit it on the top, the the 4 turn,er, second, fuse is activated.
  
  Paul goes northeast in the golf cart.
  
  The tank is chasing you!
  
  Manhorse rides very closely alongside the cart, in hot pursuit.
  
  > hit the grenade
  You bonk the grenade on the top. Something clicks mechanically inside.
  
  > wait awhile
  Time passes.
  
  Paul goes northeast in the golf cart.
  
  The tank is chasing you!
  
  Manhorse rides very closely alongside the cart, in hot pursuit.
  
  > throw grenade at the tank
  You throw the grenade at the tank! Unfotunately, it just bounces off the armor harmlessly and explodes by the wayside. Luckily, there are more grenades in the saddlebag.
  
  > wait for a while
  Time passes.
  
  Well, if you were wondering what happens if you hold a grenade in your hands for too long, the answer is, unsurprisingly, it explodes.
  
  > throw grenade at the dude
  Futile.
  
  Well, if you were wondering what happens if you hold a grenade in your hands for too long, the answer is, unsurprisingly, it explodes.
  
  > put the grenade in the tube
  You put rocket grenade into the cardboard tube.
  
  > hit the grenade
  You bonk the grenade on the top. Something clicks mechanically inside.
  
  > wait awhile
  Time passes.
  
  Paul goes northeast in the golf cart.
  
  The tank is chasing you!
  
  Manhorse rides very closely alongside the cart, in hot pursuit.
  
  > Shoot tank
  You need a gun.
  
  Well, if you were wondering what happens if you hold a grenade in your hands for too long, the answer is, unsurprisingly, it explodes.
  
  > throw the grenade at tank
  (first taking rocket grenade)
  You throw the grenade at the tank! Unfotunately, it just bounces off the armor harmlessly and explodes by the wayside. Luckily, there are more grenades in the saddlebag.
  
  > check what you're carrying
  You are carrying:
  a laser pointer
  a key
  a cardboard tube
  rocket grenade
  a wedding ring (being worn)
  The Arabian Nights: Tales of 1001 Nights
  a letter
  
  Well, if you were wondering what happens if you hold a grenade in your hands for too long, the answer is, unsurprisingly, it explodes.
  
  > attach laser to tube
  You clip the laser pointer to the cardboard tube. Neat. Now you can point (or aim) the  whole tube at distant objects.
  
  Well, if you were wondering what happens if you hold a grenade in your hands for too long, the answer is, unsurprisingly, it explodes.
  
  > attach the laser to the tube
  You clip the laser pointer to the cardboard tube. Neat. Now you can point (or aim) the  whole tube at distant objects.
  
  > hit the grenade
  You bonk the grenade on the top. Something clicks mechanically inside.
  
  > put the grenade in the tube
  Wow, you have an improvised rocket launcher.
  
  You put rocket grenade into the cardboard tube.
  
  Paul goes northeast in the golf cart.
  
  The tank is chasing you!
  
  Manhorse rides very closely alongside the cart, in hot pursuit.
  
  > Point launcher at dude
  You aim the tube at the tank. This will either net you a Darwin Award or be awesome,you think.
  The grenade ignites.
  The tube burns up in your hands faster than aluminum foil. There is a loud hissing and a trail of smoke towards the tank.
  For a second, nothing happens. With a loud, defeaning roar, the tank explodes, pushing over the golf cart, throwing you off the horse and into the woods. You crash against a tree and fall down. Around you, the forest has quickly caught fire. Flames roars, and metal cracks in the distance. You try to get up, but your back hasn't hurt this bad since your first yoga practice.
  
  This is just a place in the woods, surrounded by a roaring ring of flames.
  A burning hubcap rolls past you.
  
  A broken bottle lies here.
  
  > examine bottle
  Oh crap. You know this bottle.
  
  A shape stumbles from the fire, ragged, burnt patches of skin on the hands. Paul. He otherwise seems okay, though.
  "Paul" you croak, "I didn't know that the tank would explode quite so messily."
  Then you notice his red glowing eyes and crap your pants (not literally).
  "Oh, not to worry" says Uncle Wally. The last step he takes towards you feels like it takes a year.
  
  Alex and Paul will return.