text: > describe your surroundings
  You are standing in the dressing room, a room where (and again, you're assuming) people dress and undress. Overall, the room is pretty drab. A metal locker leans against the wall. A few benches line the floor.
  
  You can see some benches and a metal locker (in which are a t-shirt, a costume and some overalls) here.
  
  > wear the bowl
  You're already wearing that!
  
  > get all from the locker
  t-shirt: Removed.
  costume: Removed.
  overalls: Removed.
  
  > wear the costume
  Unless you've grown a couple of arms since you left the house this morning, I don't think it'll fit
  
  > wear the overalls
  You would need to spend four-to-six weeks being stretched on a torturous medieval device to be tall enough to wear these overalls. And even if you did, they'd still be covered in someone else's dried blood.
  
  You know, the more I think about it, the fact that you would even WANT to wear someone else's blood-covered overalls raises some flags. Assuming you don't get killed on your first day of work, you might want to see if your new job benefits include a psychological evaluation.
  
  Really? Giant bloody overalls?
  
  > Go south
  You are standing in a hallway. The walls, ceiling, and doors are all various shades of gray. A small sign on the door to your NORTH reads "DRESSING ROOM". A small sign on the door to your SOUTH reads "TOP SECRET". The hallway leads both EAST and WEST. To the EAST, the hallway gets very dark, very quickly. On the wall hangs what appears to be an alarm system, complete with a blinking red light and some text displayed on a small screen.
  
  You can see an alarm system here.
  
  > Go south
  You are standing in the entrance to a large hangar. The room is so large and the lights are so dim that your eyes have a difficult time adjusting. Next to the door is a small table.
  
  Just past the table is a cage. Off in the distance, you can make out the shape of a UFO.
  
  You can see a cage (which is closed) (in which is an alien) and a table (on which is a flower pot) here.
  
  > look at the table
  It's too dark to make out too many details, but from what you can tell it looks like all the other tables you've seen thus far.
  
  > examine the cage
  The cage resembles a jail cell. The bars glow blue, and appear to be electrified. A lock prevents the cage door from opening.
  
  > examine the alien
  The alien looks like every alien you've ever seen on television. He's short and gray, with big black eyes and a bigger head.
  
  The alien looks quite sad. Apparently it's no fun, being an illegal alie...un.
  
  > examine pot
  In an attempt to freshen up the place, someone brought a flower pot with a few flowers in it. Unfortunately, no one has watered the flowers in quite some time. They appear sad and wilted like your grandpa.
  
  > look at UFO
  It's tough to make out the details in the low light, but you can clearly discern the outline of a classic saucer-shaped UFO. A framework has been constructed around the UFO. Several workers appear to be looking at and/or working on the craft.
  
  > talk to the alien
  0: Say nothing.
  1: "Who ... ARE you?"
  2: "If I let you out, will you grant me a wish?"
  3: "Where did you come from?"
  
  > 1
  What do you want to say to the alien?
  
  "Sup," says the alien, in a sullen voice. "I'm Arfefidedmlioonl, but everybody calls me Arf. I'd shake your hand, but ...". Arf motions toward the electrified cage. "I hope you're here to rescue me, because they're going to kill both of us.
  
  0: Say nothing.
  1: "What do you mean, kill both of us?"
  2: "Kill us? That's nonsense!"
  
  > 1
  What do you want to say to the alien?
  
  "Despite the fact that I zoomed through space, time, and multiple dimensions to get to this planet, apparently my species, most unfortunately, tastes like sushi. I don't know what your story is yet, but based on the fact that you're wearing a fishbowl for a helmet, I'll bet it's a good one."
  
  > talk to the alien
  0: Say nothing.
  1: "If I let you out, will you grant me a wish?"
  2: "Where did you come from?"
  
  > 2
  What do you want to say to the alien?
  
  "Listen bro -- you get me out of here, we'll go get some coffee, rap, compare war stories, whatever. You can write a tell-all book and sell a million copies for all I care.. Right now, we need to get out of here!"
  
  > Inventory
  You are carrying:
  a flower pot
  some overalls
  a costume
  a t-shirt
  a spacesuit (being worn)
  a pair of gloves (being worn)
  a keycard
  a new employee sticker
  a business card
  a bag of Reese's Pieces
  a candy bar
  a coffee mug
  a pen
  a fish bowl (being worn)
  a remote control
  
  > give Reese 's pieces tothe alienn
  You toss the candy into the cage. The alien lets out a small sigh. "I don't want to sound ungrateful but ... eh, you know, it's a little racist. I mean, if I looked like a leprechaun would you have me dance a little jig? No, I mean ... you know, I get it and all, and thanks, but ... man, if it's all the same to you, I'd love some real food. Actually every time I come to this planet, I usually have tacos.
  
  > use remote
  My goodness, is there anything this remote won't do? With the push of a button, the cage door suddenly springs open. The small alien leaps out of the cage and lands directly in front of you. "I'm free!" he shouts loudly, attracting the attention of the workers off in the distance. Uh oh. It's time to get out of here, and fast!
  
  Arf is dragging you by the arm. "Let's go!" he cries.
  
  "Hey!" yells one of the workers. "Arfefidedmlioonl is out of his cage ... and that guy's wearing a fishbowl! Let's get 'em!" The crew of workers quickly transforms into an angry mob. The workers are about 30 feet away from you, and running toward you.
  
  > look at the lock
  The lock appears to be electronic in nature. You can't find a spot to put a key, even if you had one. Which you don't.
  
  Arf is dragging you by the arm. "Let's go!" he cries.
  
  The mob is about 20' feet away, and they look mean (they're mean, they're mean, you know what I mean?)