text: If you actually had any friends you'd ask them if they could help, but since you don't, you ask Gil if he knows anyone.
  
  "Not really." He says.
  "Come on Gil, I mean you must know someone! There were a ton of aquatic sea monsters!"
  "Oh yeah, we ALL know each other. Damn land dweller ignorance. I bet we all look alike to too you right?" Gil says annoyed.
  "And I suppose you don't think we all look alike?" you retort.
  "Alright nevermind. I don't know though, most of the beings I know, tolerate land dwellers even less than I do. And most of them can't even leave the water to begin with."
  "I guess giant crabs and squids are out of the question then huh?"
  "You guess right."
  "Damn."
  "Okay well, I DO have a cousin that might help, but we haven't spoken in years."
  "Would he be of much help?"
  "Oh he'd be more than enough help; he doesn't much care for aliens in general. In fact he doesn't like anyone and is very violent."
  "Sounds like a great guy." You say.
  "Hmm, yes I'm sure you and he have a few things in common. He's another that pointless picks fights and believes in proving his dominance whenever possible."
  "Well get his ass over here!"
  "I don't know if he'll come, we had a fight about something a long time ago hence the reason we haven't spoken."
  "Gil, I know Moreau has at least one phone on this island. USE IT. NOW!"
  "Alright, I'll try, but like I said I don't know if he'll come to help.
  
  You and Gil make your way back to Moreau's freak town where the freaks still give you strange looks. You knock on Moreau's door.
  
  "Hey Moreau! Open up, Gil's gotta use the phone."
  
  Moreau looks as haggard as ever when he opens his door.
  
  "Damn Moreau, you look like shit, you really need to take better care of yourself. Eat some fucking meat. Anyway, Gil has a bad ass cousin apparently that can help, he just needs to call him."
  "Wolf, I don't know if he'll come, and now that I'm thinking about it, I don't know if I WANT him to come. He might still be pissed at me."
  "Have some faith Gil."
  
  Gil picks up the phone and starts pressing a million numbers.
  
  "Where the hell does your cousin live, Gil?"
  "Japan. Oh I got a tone... here he is. Hello Godzilla?"
  
  "Your cousin is FUCKING GODZILLA?!" you ask.
  "Oh even I've heard of him, heard he was giant lizard that routinely defeated other monsters and aliens. Surely he'll be able to help." Moreau says hopefully.
  
  You look at Moreau in disbelief, he apparently has been such a recluse he hasn't even kept up on who the fuck Godzilla really is and the extent of his power. You know damn well if Godzilla comes here, the Martians will be destroyed, but so will everything else on the island!
  
  "It's me. No don't hang up! Look I'm sorry about that! I didn't mean for that to happen! Come on I really need your help. I'm in a predicament and... "
  
  You snatch the phone from Gil
  
  "Dammit, no matter what shit happened between you two, you should at least know how your cousin's mind operates by now, Gil!" you say to Gil.
  
  "Hello, Godzilla? Big fan. My name's Wolf you might know me, but it doesn't matter if you don't. Look there's a bunch of fucking Martians coming down to Earth thinking they're tough shit and acting like they're going to own the place. Yeah I know you're King of the Monsters here on Earth, but you know how all aliens are, they're arrogant bastards. Okay. Oh why thank you! That was my favorite role; I got to kill 17 humans in that one! Glad to see you have heard of me. Alright bye."
  
  You turn to Moreau and Gil.
  
  "He's coming." You say.
  > sit back and watch the show
  No way are you going to miss a front row seat to watch the master do his work! You just need a good place to be at that's out of the way of the destruction.
  
  "Okay so now that that's settled, is there any place on the island that's relatively uninhabited?" you ask
  "As you can see the island is mostly still in its natural state, but I'm assuming you're talking about areas that aren't visited or traveled very often, well there's a peninsula on the island that's pretty much avoided since it just consists of a rocky plateau. Nothing grows there and it's barren."
  "Good that's where I'll be then." You say.
  Moreau looks at you wondering why you're acting strangely, then he wonders the same thing about Gil when he starts asking to leave.
  
  "Uh... Moreau can you take me back to the mainland? I don't care; just drop me off at the nearest swamp." Gil asks.
  "What?! I can't leave right now, the Martians will be here soon and so will your cousin, I have to look out for my people! Why do you want to leave anyway? I thought you were going to live here."
  "I changed my mind! Look it won't take that long, I just need to leave!"
  "Well I'm not leaving now, you'll have to wait until this blows over. Or if you really want to leave I'm sure you can swim."
  "It's the fucking ocean you dick! I can't be swimming in saltwater for extended periods of time! I can't wait either! My cousin still sounded like he was pissed at me! He'll destroy this whole island and me with it!"
  "What?!" Moreau says startled.
  "Uh, Gil's exaggerating! Nothing to worry about!" you say attempting to shut Gil up.
  "Wait a minute! What the hell have you two brought to my island!?"
  "Dammit Moreau, if you don't know who the fuck Godzilla is it's your own damn fault! Look just keep your freaks out of the way and everything will be fine." You say.
  
  Now Moreau looks as green as Gil, who's looking even greener if such a thing was possible. They're looking very worried.
  > come up with another plan
  "Hey look I got an idea... "
  "SHUT UP! JUST SHUT UP WOLF!" Moreau screams.
  "I can't believe I let you talk me into calling my cousin!" Gil says and then attacks you!
  
  You and Gil start wailing on each other pretty good, eventually your fighting brings you both in the middle of the town where Moreau's freaks look on in wide eyed wonder. They're even more surprised when Moreau comes out with a silver fork and stabs you in the back with it.
  
  "Agh! What the fuck? Fuckin' silverware? You're gonna have to do better than that Freakmaker!" you say turning around, and slashing Moreau a couple times across the throat, killing him. Unfortunately you turned your back on Gil, who takes advantage of the fork in your back and drives it in deeper, puncturing vital organs.
  
  You fall to the ground in extreme pain attempting to catch your breath, as Gil smashes your face into some rocks and reenacting a psycho killer tactic by repeatedly stabbing the shit out of you with the silver fork, until he's sure you're dead.
  
  Gil's revenge is short lived though. He's killed in the big battle between the Martians and his cousin a few days later. In fact nothing on the island survives the battle except Godzilla.