text: > go downwards
  My treacherous robot minions are blocking the gangway downward. I can't break past them.
  
  > Fore
  I'm in the robot command area of the ship, its innermost cortex from which Dashing directs MY automata. Pfaugh! The lout! The electromechanical computation engine seems to be in recent repair, fortunately. Ah, and there's the bookshelf, where the technical manuals and programmer's notes are meant to be stored. The aft exit leads back to the main deck.
  
  I can see an aquamarine punch card here.
  
  > Starboard
  Now I stand in the master suite. A monument to OPULENCE and SOPHISTICATION, such as the world has never seen! Well-balanced Doric columns, gilt everywhere, and crimson walls that say, "Here sleeps one such as the world has never seen!" Mirrors line the walls and ceiling, drawing the eye to a magnificent painting of Rex Dashing! And the bed! It's ENORMOUS! As much as I hate Dashing, I have to admit that he's got style. The exit to port leads back to the main deck.
  
  On the bed are a scarf and a green book.
  
  Odd, I expected Dashing to be here. It's no matter; nowhere on the ship is safe from the NUCLEAR EXPLOSION I'm going to unleash.
  
  [With the immediate threat resolved, you can now switch freely
  between Dirk and Amelia.]
  
  [Your fee has just gone up by $2 million.]
  
  > look at the scarf
  It's a fur scarf.
  
  > Examine book
  A dimestore novel? By REX DASHING? Sorry, Owl, but I refuse.
  
  > look at the bed
  It's a magnificent thing, red and circular. I'm loath to admit that Dashing got it right, but it is entirely appropriate for a supervillain's inner sanctum.
  
  > examine the mirrors
  I'm reminded of an optics paper I wrote a few years ago analyzing the behavior of light in large gravitational fields.
  
  > look at the columns
  Columns. Doric.
  
  > Wear scarf
  Not really my style, Owl.
  
  > answer the line one
  You switch back to Amelia on line 1.
  
  This room is garishly appointed with the hunting trophies Dashing must have scavenged throughout the world: hulking bears and moose from the Americas, lions from Africa, elephants from the Orient, and a menagerie of creatures even I barely recognize. While I obviously don't approve of his vicious little hobby, I have to admit that he at least has a healthy respect for nature.
  
  Exits lead north, west, and east (the last being through a heavy metal door), and a spiral staircase elegantly winds upward.
  
  I can see a display case (which contains a cudgel, a harpoon, and a mace) here.
  
  The robots have wandered off again, Owl. Let's continue. The God-Slug has to be somewhere on this ship. Dashing is presumably still here too, so let's be careful.
  
  > examine the case
  A display case for that bullet-headed warmonger's weapons.
  
  Inside the display case are a cudgel, a harpoon, and a mace.
  
  > examine the elephant
  A massive elephant, posed as if it's ready to charge. Although the lifelessness of the elephant detracts from its menace, the creature's size is still impressive.
  
  > examine the lion
  Frozen in place, the lions are more of a curiosity than a terror. Trust me, lions are terrifying in real life.
  
  > eat the elephant
  Capital idea, Owl, but I'm afraid it wouldn't work. The unnatural chemicals used during the taxidermy process have made these animals totally unsuited to my power.
  
  > go to the east
  (first opening the heavy metal door)
  The door is tremendously heavy. Even all the animals assembled here wouldn't be able to budge it.
  
  > go to the north
  I'm standing at the edge of a vast tank, above which a cage is suspended. Fortunately, I'm no longer in the cage. I know you're already aware of that fact; I just like repeating it. There is a prominent red button on the wall, and an exit leads south. There's also a trapdoor high overhead.
  
  I can see a steel cage here.
  
  > Go south
  This room is garishly appointed with the hunting trophies Dashing must have scavenged throughout the world: hulking bears and moose from the Americas, lions from Africa, elephants from the Orient, and a menagerie of creatures even I barely recognize. While I obviously don't approve of his vicious little hobby, I have to admit that he at least has a healthy respect for nature.
  
  Exits lead north, west, and east (the last being through a heavy metal door), and a spiral staircase elegantly winds upward.
  
  I can see a display case (which contains a cudgel, a harpoon, and a mace) here.
  
  > go west
  What a dreary conglomeration of stainless steel and Bakelite! There are enormous cabinets set into the walls, with a long metal counter on top. Most of the equipment here is sadly of the physical rather than life science variety, but I do recognize a terrarium here. There is an exit to the east.
  
  I can see a terrarium (which contains a gecko) and a metal enclosure (which is closed) here.
  
  > examine the gecko
  It's a big one, about a foot long. Bright black eyes, green skin, tiny crawly feet. I could just eat it up.
  
  > examine the enclosure
  A rough metal cabinet, about the size of a bookcase. It's closed, but there's a narrow slot on the front of it.
  
  > Examine slot
  The cabinet has an oblong slot on it, about the size of a large visiting card.
  
  > take the case
  That's fixed in place.
  
  > Go up
  This deck provides a spectacular panoramic view of the open sky. It would be enjoyable to watch the fluffy clouds darting past if I weren't on an important mission. Exits lead in east and west, and there is a mahogany door to the north. An ornate staircase leads down, and a more utilitarian gangway leads upward.
  
  I can see a klaxon here.
  
  > examine the klaxon
  This klaxon is attached to the ship's alarm system; fortunately, it's silent now. There's a small black button on the side of it.
  
  > go west
  This room is little more than a closet. It's filled with a bewildering variety of electronics, which I vaguely recognize as being some sort of communications gear. A bulky microphone sits in front of the console. The exit out of this claustrophobic room is to the east.
  
  > Sing
  Perhaps later. Right now, I have a mission to complete.
  
  > Go east
  This deck provides a spectacular panoramic view of the open sky. It would be enjoyable to watch the fluffy clouds darting past if I weren't on an important mission. Exits lead in east and west, and there is a mahogany door to the north. An ornate staircase leads down, and a more utilitarian gangway leads upward.
  
  I can see a klaxon here.
  
  > go east
  The airship's guest suite is bare and uninviting, possibly a ploy by Dashing to make his own room more appealing. There is a bed, of course, and a tacky rug is underfoot. The only exit is to the west.
  
  There is a small desk next to the bed.
  
  > look under the rug
  There are no cunningly concealed trapdoors underneath, though I suppose that sort of thing is passé now.
  
  > look at the desk
  It's a flowery desk of the sort aristocrats often hide their valuables in. It has a single drawer.
  
  The ornate desk is closed.
  
  > open the desk
  It seems to be locked.
  
  > Inventory
  I've got the zeta-transmitter your man gave me, concealed in a cameo I'm wearing around my neck. Beyond that...well, I've got my wits about me, at least; surely that's worth something?
  
  > examine the bed
  It's a mercifully plain bed.
  
  > eat the gecko
  (first taking the gecko)
  It skitters away, but I managed to grab hold of its tail---which just popped off! How delightful!
  
  > eat the tail
  Oh, very well. Give me a moment...
  
  That tasted a bit odd. My hands and feet feel sticky, and there's faint webbing on them. The rest of me feels lighter, too, though I don't suppose I look much different.
  
  > go upward
  All right, I'll climb up the walls with my gecko power. Good thing I'm still barefoot.
  
  I'm in a comfortable room with a long table flanked by opulent leather chairs. It looks like a corporate board room, though there are fortunately no cigar-chomping plutocrats in evidence. A mahogany door leads south, and there is a conspicuous trapdoor beneath the table.
  
  I can see a black bag (which is closed) here.
  
  > open bag
  All right, I've opened the black bag, revealing a set of lockpicks and a paper fan.
  
  Drat, I was hoping I had stashed some useful animal parts in here. My original plan had been to use the roast duck course at dinner to make my escape, so I didn't think it was necessary to smuggle anything else on board. It looks like we'll have to improvize to find a way off the ship.
  
  > take the bag
  Taken.
  
  > unlock door with the lockpick
  Which do you mean, the trapdoor or the austere mahogany door?
  
  > Austere
  (first taking the set of lockpicks)
  With a sullen click, the lock yields.
  
  [Your fee has just gone up by $2 million.]
  
  > Go south
  (first opening the austere mahogany door)
  
  This deck provides a spectacular panoramic view of the open sky. It would be enjoyable to watch the fluffy clouds darting past if I weren't on an important mission. Exits lead in east and west, and there is a mahogany door to the north. An ornate staircase leads down, and a more utilitarian gangway leads upward.
  
  I can see a klaxon here.
  
  My animal power has subsided.
  
  > take the harpoon and the cudgel
  harpoon: I say, these weapons are heavy! I'm already carrying the mace; it's too much to hold onto the harpoon as well.
  cudgel: I say, these weapons are heavy! I'm already carrying the mace; it's too much to hold onto the cudgel as well.
  
  > examine the mace
  A stout mace. Dashing doesn't seem the type to engage in hand-to-hand combat, though.
  
  > put it in the bag
  The mace is too large to fit inside the black bag.
  
  > examine the bag
  My beloved bag! It's a black leather case I use to carry my thievery tools on missions such as this one. Dashing's robot goons took it from me when they imprisoned me in the cage.
  
  The black bag is open and contains a paper fan.
  
  > look at the fan
  A proper Victorian paper fan. When I first infiltrated the ship as a society darling, it was an integral part of my disguise; now it's just a decoration.
  
  > go to the east
  (first opening the heavy metal door)
  The door is tremendously heavy. Even all the animals assembled here wouldn't be able to budge it.
  
  > go to the north
  I'm in a comfortable room with a long table flanked by opulent leather chairs. It looks like a corporate board room, though there are fortunately no cigar-chomping plutocrats in evidence. A mahogany door leads south, and there is a conspicuous trapdoor beneath the table.
  
  > open the desk with lockpick
  With a sullen click, the lock yields.
  
  > open the desk
  All right, I've opened the ornate desk, revealing an access card.
  
  > take the card
  Taken.