text: > Look around
  You are inside a vast cave that vanishes into darkess on all sides, except for the entrance to the west. The lush carpet of wealth contained herein is enough to make even you, Elmo Fuld, millionaire, gasp. A narrow beam of sharp desert light flows in from outside and reflects off a ruck of rubies, from where it bounces off into brood of beryl, heads for a heap of heliotrope, crashes into a clot of carnelian, hurries to a hunk of hyacinth, bashes into a battillion of bloodstone, careens into a cohort of carbuncle, makes for a murmuration of moonstone, and, completely zonked, catches some z's in a crowded zareba of cubic zirconium.
  You see a ridge in the ground running from east to west here.
  
  > go east
  You take a step into the vast darkness of the mine, but you realize that, without a light source, you risk plummeting into an unseen shaft. Better not risk it.
  
  > Blow
  The East Winds blow furiously for a moment, then subside.
  
  > Go west
  You stand in the middle of a huge desert, north of a stand of struggling trees and west of a deep cave. As you stand staring into the vast darkness that lies within the cavern, a strange smell on the wind makes your nose twitch. You pause for a moment and recognize it. It's the smell of wealth.
  You see a ridge in the ground running from west to south here.
  
  > smell wealth
  I don't understand that sentence.
  
  I don't see any wealth here.
  
  > Go south
  The trees here are sparser, and the thick moss that covers the
  ground seems to be fighting a losing battle with the desert that approaches from the north and the west. Paths lead east and southeast back into the forest. A large metal cage stands empty here.
  You see a ridge in the ground running from north to east here.
  
  > Go east
  You are in a thick patch of towering redwoods. A path leads west, where the trees grow sparser, and south. Looming over you to the north is the tower in whose base you were so recently imprisoned. From the outside, you can see that the tower looks like a humungous carrot.
  
  Oooooooh, you're going to get that rabbit.
  You see a ridge in the ground running from west to south here.
  
  > go south
  You are standing deep within the woods. A thick roof of leaves
  blocks most sunlight from entering, and a thick wall of treetrunks blocks you from exiting in most directions. You can squeeze through to the north and the northwest, where the forest seems to grow less dense. There's a hole in the ground, but it's too narrow for you to fit through.
  You see a ridge in the ground running from the south and ending in a hole here.
  Bud Bunny is here.
  
  "It's so thoughtful of you not to have shot me yet," Bud says. "I could just kiss you." He throws his furry arms around you, plants a huge kiss on your lips, and then goes back to scrutinizing his map.
  
  > examine the map
  It's a large map of the United States, covered with an elaborate route marked in purple crayon.
  
  > Blow
  The West Winds blow furiously for a moment, then subside.
  
  "It's so thoughtful of you not to have shot me yet," Bud says. "I could just kiss you." He throws his furry arms around you, plants a huge kiss on your lips, and then goes back to scrutinizing his map.
  
  > examine Bud
  Like all rabbits, Bud is buck-toothed, big-eared, and roughly six feet tall.
  
  > shoot bud
  As you raise the gun, Bud sticks his finger in the barrel. "Sorry, Doc, it's duck season." Embarrassed, you lower the gun.
  
  > show the sign to Bud
  Bud looks at the sign, blinks for a moment, and then says "If you'll excuse me, I believe I've left a pot on the boil." Before you can react, he leaps in the air, executes a neat flip, and dives headfirst into the hole."
  
  * * * Your score just increased by 1 point. * * *
  
  > examine the hole
  It's a narrow dark hole.
  
  Suddenly, like Venus arising from the waves, a vision of loveliness pops out of the hole. She has the largest curves, the sweetest breath, and the merriest eyes you've ever seen, all combined into one six-foot-tall package. And, most attractive of all, the has a thick mane of beautiful blond hair. You are overcome with love and desire. You can think of nothing better than wedding her and devoting the rest of your life to making her happy, even if she does have buck teeth and big floppy ears. "Eh, what's up, dear?" she asks, in a faintly Southern lilt.
  
  > Kiss woman
  The woman slaps you. "Not on the first date!" she says.
  
  > Blow
  The West Winds blow fiercely for a moment, setting the woman's beautiful blond hair just a little bit askew. You stare at it suspiciously as you realize it may be a wig--but you decide that, unless the hair comes off completely, you will trust your newfound love.
  
  > Blow
  The East Winds blow fiercely, ripping the woman's beautiful blond hair off entirely. As it goes sailing off into the distance, you realize with a shock that this vision of loveliness is none other than Bud Bunny. Oh, cruel, cruel fate! Oh, to have love so near, then snatched away! Ooooh--in short-- that rascally rabbit!
  
  * * * Your score just increased by 1 point. * * *
  
  > shoot bud
  You lift the gun to shoot Bud. He stands bravely at attention. "Go ahead, shoot me, Doc," he says. "I don't deserve to live." As you are about to pull the trigger, a single tear cascades down his cheek, smudging his mascara and making you hesitate for a moment, gun in mid-air.
  
  > shoot bud
  You steel your nerve to pull the trigger. "What are you waiting for, Doc?" Bud asks you. "Just shoot. Try not to think about the wife and fifteen little ones whose lives depend on me." You pause. Can you really make fifteen litte ones starve just so you can dine on hasenpfefer?
  
  > shoot bud
  All right. This time you're going to do it. As your finger tenses on the trigger, Bud, who has been quietly sniffling, suddenly breaks out into full fledged tears. "Go ahead, Doc," he bawls. "Put me out of my misery. Put a bullet in my brain. Forget about all laws of human kindness, I beg you, and shoot me. What does it matter if you'll be hated, mocked, ostracized, even, for shooting a helpless beast? You'll be doing me a favor. Surely you're not so selfish as to condemn me to a lifetime of guilt over my cruel trick just because you'll have to endure a lifetime of humilation for shooting me." You stop and consider the image that Bud has painted for you. Is a single meal worth destroying your life?
  
  > Yes
  That was a rhetorical question.
  
  > shoot bud
  Drat that rabbit! He's just playing with your mind. Well, you're going to shoot him. You close your eyes so you can't see his tears. You pull down your hunting cap over your ears so you can't hear his sobs. You raise the gun and pull the trigger--but at that very moment, the game warden runs up and knocks the gun out of your hands. As you open your eyes and stare at him in frustration, he shrugs. "Sorry, Mr. Fuld. It's now roadrunner season. If you had only fired a few minutes earlier..."
  "Bud's tears vanish in an instant. "Sorry about that, Doc," he
  says, grabbing your hand and shaking it wildly up and down. "Better luck next season. Good luck hunting roadrunners. Been a pleasure doing business with you. Ta ta. Don't forget to write. Don't let the bedbugs bite. Don't take any wooden nickles. Look both ways before crossing the street. Say hi to the missus for me." With that, he strides off, leaving you to fume for yet another year.
  
  * * * Your score just increased by 2 points.* * *
  
  In a total of 161 turns, you have achieved a score of 10 points out of a possible 10.
  This makes you Worthy Of The Memory of Mel Blanc.
  Thanks for visiting Toonesia. Th-th-th-that's all, folks!
  
  Well, what did you expect in a cartoon--a satisfying ending?