text: [Themes: Horror, Science Fiction, Satire, surreal, strong profanity]
  
  > Look around
  A ragged hole in the west wall lets a dusty beam of light in.
  
  Robertson staggers after you, laughing and hacking at the air with his letter opener.
  
  More of the same dirty, broken passageway. It looks as though the entire east wall of the office has been hollowed out from one end to the other.
  
  Robertson isn't looking so good. He's eyeing you up and down in an decidedly un-frosty way.
  
  A ragged hole in the west wall lets a dusty beam of light in.
  
  Robertson suddenly lunges at you, screaming, "GUY'S GOTTA EAT YOU KNOW! GUY'S GOTTA EAT YOU KNOW!!"
  
  > kick the wall
  Which do you mean, the hole in the wall or the wall?
  
  > hit Robertson with fire extinguisher
  You whirl around, swinging the heavy fire extinguisher like a golf club, in a rising arc that catches him right under the chin. Everything below his nose flattens up into his upper jaw like a cheap piece of origami. He hits the floor, his precious letter opener clattering from his limp fingers.
  
  Faintly, on the other side of the wall, you can hear a phone ringing.
  
  [You have just become a little bit more frosty.]
  
  > go south
  An ancient, dusty water cooler is stashed way back in the far corner.
  
  Most of the limited floor space is occupied by a large metal drawer sticking out of the western wall at roughly knee-level. You have to practically climb over it to maneuver.
  
  Faintly, on the other side of the wall, you can hear a phone ringing.
  
  > take cooler
  That's fixed in place.
  
  Faintly, on the other side of the wall, you can hear a phone ringing.
  
  > examine the drawer
  It's a rectangular, open-topped box made of metal, about five feet long, two feet wide and two feet deep.
  
  Faintly, on the other side of the wall, you can hear a phone ringing.
  
  > enter the drawer
  You fold yourself awkwardly into the cramped metal box, noticing, as you do so, a small gray button mounted on the inside.
  
  Faintly, on the other side of the wall, you can hear a phone ringing.
  
  > go outside
  As soon as you clamber out, the drawer retracts jerkily back into the east wall, slamming shut with a bang.
  
  Somewhere in the office, you can hear a phone ringing.
  
  > Go west
  On the desk are an in-tray (which is empty), an out-tray (which is empty) and a telephone.
  
  Your phone is ringing.
  
  > answer the phone
  You pick up the receiver and place it against your ear. It's Biedermeyer.
  
  "This is Biedermeyer," says Biedermeyer. "I would like you to step into my office, please. Immediately."
  
  Then he hangs up.
  
  [You have just become a little bit less frosty.]
  
  > go north
  On the desk are a plastic cup (in which is some nasty coffee) and a microfiche reader.
  
  Somewhere in the office, you can hear a phone ringing.
  
  > take the cup
  Taken.
  
  Somewhere in the office, you can hear a phone ringing.
  
  > Empty cup
  You can't pour the nothing; it's not a liquid!
  
  Somewhere in the office, you can hear a phone ringing.
  
  > Empty coffee
  The nasty coffee can't contain things.
  
  Somewhere in the office, you can hear a phone ringing.
  
  > pour the coffee
  Stop trying to make a mess.
  
  Somewhere in the office, you can hear a phone ringing.
  
  > drink the coffee
  The nasty coffee might stick going down, don't you think?
  
  Somewhere in the office, you can hear a phone ringing.
  
  [You have just become a little bit less frosty.]
  
  > go east
  The vending machine is lying face down and smashed amidst a pile of nougat bars and Beechnut gum.
  
  There's a ragged hole hacked into the east wall, where the vending machine used to stand.
  
  Somewhere in the office, you can hear a phone ringing.
  
  > Go north
  The restroom door wheezes shut behind you as you pass through.
  
  The gutted smoke detector hangs limply from the ceiling, its innards exposed and dangling.
  
  You can also see the stool here.
  
  Somewhere in the office, you can hear a phone ringing.
  
  > go to the east
  You can't, since the stall door is in the way.
  
  Somewhere in the office, you can hear a phone ringing.
  
  > open the door
  Which do you mean, the stall door or the restroom door?
  
  > Stall
  You open the stall door.
  
  Somewhere in the office, you can hear a phone ringing.
  
  > Go east
  Somewhere in the office, you can hear a phone ringing.
  
  > Go west
  The gutted smoke detector hangs limply from the ceiling, its innards exposed and dangling.
  
  You can also see the stool here.
  
  Somewhere in the office, you can hear a phone ringing.
  
  > pour the coffee in the sink
  You dump the nasty coffee into the sink, and it swirls harmlessly away.
  
  Somewhere in the office, you can hear a phone ringing.
  
  > sit on the toilet
  You turn around and lower yourself onto the seat. Aside from the fact that you are now facing the other direction, little has changed.
  
  Somewhere in the office, you can hear a phone ringing.
  
  > Unlock dispenser
  (with the shiny key)
  You insert the shiny key into the keyhole and twist it clockwise. A mechanism inside the toilet paper dispenser clicks, and the bathroom is filled with a rumbling sound. Suddenly, the entire rear wall of the stall spins on a hidden axis, taking the toilet and yourself along with it...
  
  Behind the Restroom (on the toilet)
  You're in a narrow, irregular passageway behind the east wall of the restroom. The walls are all dust and splintered wood and ragged plaster, and the floor is bare concrete.
  
  Faintly, on the other side of the wall, you can hear a phone ringing.
  
  > stand
  As soon as you stand up, the wall spins again, whisking the toilet away and leaving you with nothing but a blank wall.
  
  Faintly, on the other side of the wall, you can hear a phone ringing.
  
  > Go south
  Robertson is gravy. His digging days are over.
  
  You can also see a letter opener here.
  
  A ragged hole in the west wall lets a dusty beam of light in.
  
  Faintly, on the other side of the wall, you can hear a phone ringing.
  
  > go south
  An ancient, dusty water cooler is stashed way back in the far corner.
  
  Most of the limited floor space is occupied by a large metal drawer sticking out of the western wall at roughly knee-level. You have to practically climb over it to maneuver.
  
  Faintly, on the other side of the wall, you can hear a phone ringing.
  
  > take the opener
  Taken.
  
  Faintly, on the other side of the wall, you can hear a phone ringing.
  
  > fill the cup with the water
  The water is inside an enclosed tank -- you can't get at it.
  
  Faintly, on the other side of the wall, you can hear a phone ringing.
  
  > examine cooler
  It's an old office water cooler -- you're not sure how you recognize it, but you're sure you've seen one before. There's a plastic spigot poking out the front, and there's even a little bit of water sloshing around in the tank.
  
  Faintly, on the other side of the wall, you can hear a phone ringing.
  
  > examine the spigot
  The little plastic spigot is old, warped and corroded.
  
  Faintly, on the other side of the wall, you can hear a phone ringing.
  
  > open the spigot
  The spigot is too corroded; it won't work.
  
  Faintly, on the other side of the wall, you can hear a phone ringing.
  
  > cut the spigot
  (with the scissors)
  You can't get the little blades around the spigot well enough to cut it.
  
  Faintly, on the other side of the wall, you can hear a phone ringing.
  
  > cut the spigot with the opener
  You don't have anything to cut with!
  
  Faintly, on the other side of the wall, you can hear a phone ringing.
  
  > Stab cooler
  You jab the letter opener into the side of the tank, puncturing the thick plastic. When you let go, the blade stays, vibrating slightly.
  
  Faintly, on the other side of the wall, you can hear a phone ringing.
  
  > get the opener
  The blade pulls free with a sharp squeak. Immediately, water begins trickling out through the hole.
  
  Faintly, on the other side of the wall, you can hear a phone ringing.
  
  The water trickles slowly out of the tank.
  
  > fill the cup with the water
  You hold the cup under the thin trickle until it fills up with water, at which point the trickle dies away.
  
  Faintly, on the other side of the wall, you can hear a phone ringing.
  
  > enter the drawer
  You fold yourself awkwardly into the cramped metal box, noticing, as you do so, a small gray button mounted on the inside.
  
  Faintly, on the other side of the wall, you can hear a phone ringing.
  
  > go outside
  As soon as you clamber out, the drawer retracts jerkily back into the east wall, slamming shut with a bang.
  
  Somewhere in the office, you can hear a phone ringing.
  
  > Go west
  On the desk are an in-tray (which is empty), an out-tray (which is empty) and a telephone.
  
  Your phone is ringing.
  
  > Bluemen umpty
  Enter saved game to store: Ok.
  
  > go to the north
  On the desk is a microfiche reader.
  
  > go to the north
  The door to Biedermeyer's office stands just slightly ajar.
  
  > open the door
  You nudge the door slightly with your fingertips, and it slowly, slowly creaks open.
  
  > Go north
  A cool, languid ribbon of fear uncurls inside your stomach as you step over the threshold...
  
  Biedermeyer's inner sanctum: a featureless cube with smooth, gray walls, and his desk sitting in the exact center like a great black sarcophagus. There is one door. It is south.
  
  The door to Biedermeyer's office stands open.
  
  Biedermeyer taps his foot impatiently.
  
  The door slams shut behind you.
  
  Biedermeyer steps calmly around his desk. He takes a deep breath, and adjusts his glasses slightly. Then he looks at you and says, "Frankly, I don't know what we're going to do with you."
  
  > ask Biedermeyer about the blue
  "Yes, I realize that must have been upsetting to see," Biedermeyer says, nodding patiently. "But you have only yourself to blame. Soon you would have been ready, if only you had played by the rules."
  
  "We tried," he goes on, his voice sad, "to provide you with an environment that was safe."
  
  > ask Biedermeyer about Robertson
  "Ah, yes, poor Robertson," he sighs. "A failed experiment. One I'm not proud of. The blame is entirely mine, of course. I should have looked after him more closely." He chuckles. "I almost made the same mistake with you."
  
  "We tried to give you something familiar, something that you would have no trouble..." he pauses, searching mentally for the right word.
  
  > ask Biedermeyer about the glasses
  Biedermeyer smiles. "It's good to see you finally taking an interest," he says. "You would have been issued a pair yourself, soon, if you had only stuck with the program."
  
  "-- accommodating," he blurts suddenly. "Yes. Something you would have no trouble accommodating. We never wanted this to be anything other than a most pleasant experience for you."
  
  > ask Biedermeyer about the program
  Biedermeyer spreads his hands in a curiously benedictory manner. "Why, this is your home," he says softly. "This is your salvation. Didn't you know that? This is your only hope of refuge from the demons that hounded you here from your former life. You should be grateful that we let you work here at all. I daresay, you could never find a better job than this, even if you spent your whole life trying."
  
  "God knows, you needed it after what you'd been through out there."
  
  > ask Biedermeyer about the former life
  Biedermeyer shakes his head. "No remembering, now. Naughty, naughty."
  
  Biedermeyer gives you a stern look. "But that wasn't good enough for you, was it?"
  
  > ask Biedermeyer about Furman
  Biedermeyer looks almost proud. "I couldn't ask for a more exemplary employee."
  
  "You had to fight us every step of the way, didn't you? You really thought that you knew better than us what was good for you. You thought you could heal all on your own."
  
  > ask Biedermeyer about the demons
  Biedermeyer shakes his head. "No remembering, now. Naughty, naughty."
  
  Biedermeyer shakes his head. "Well, I must say I have no patience for that. And I do not feel sorry for you. I will not tolerate busy-bodies, know-betters, or rule-scoffers in my office."
  
  > ask Biedermeyer about office
  "It's high time you got used to it," says Biedermeyer ominously. "You're staying here for a long, long time."
  
  With a sharp tug, Biedermeyer pulls off his glasses. They come off with a small sucking sound. He rubs the bridge of his nose a bit, and when he looks up you can see translucent membranes nictitating briefly across his pupils.
  
  > wait a while
  Time passes.
  
  "Your days of youthful rebellion are at an end, my boy," he says softly, stepping close to you. "I know you think this will be a bad thing, but I promise you: soon you will see that it had to be done. Soon you will see everything." And he reaches out while you are held paralyzed by his reptile gaze, and he slips the glasses onto your face.
  
  There is a brief burning sensation as something worms quickly into your skull behind each of your ears.
  
  "There, now," you hear Biedermeyer whisper, "isn't that better?"
  
  And the funny thing is -- it is. It is much better. And he's right -- pretty soon, you DO see everything.
  
  > throw the water at Biedermeyer
  With a convulsive jerk of your arm, you dash the water into the bastard's smug, repulsive face. Biedermeyer stops dead, silent, just blinking at you stupidly as the water drips down his skin.
  
  And then the hissing begins. And Biedermeyer's skin starts dripping along with the water.
  
  With a sudden, strangled shriek, Biedermeyer lurches backward, digging his nails into the flesh of his face. "Oh, you miserable little shit!" he yells. "What the bloody fuck have you done?" Already his voice is starting to slur, gurgling as though he were speaking through a mouthful of cold maple syrup.
  
  He turns to you, and his face is a dripping mess running with streaks of oozing blue. Whatever monstrous, cerulean visage lay behind his mask of skin is melting along with everything else. He holds his hands out to you imploringly -- the fingers are pouring away down his arms like superheated candle stubs.
  
  "Uh cuhd... uhf duhn... suh muhsh... fuh yuh..." he gurgles, and then his entire body slops down into itself, leaving nothing but a bluish-pinkish puddle of ooze on the floor, with his thick black glasses lying unharmed in the middle of it.
  
  [You have just become a little bit more frosty.]
  
  > take the glasses
  You gingerly pluck the glasses from the puddle and shake the worst of the goo off them.