text: "I want to be a pirate."
  
  The man stares at you in disbelief for a moment and looks you up and down before laughing heartily.
  
  "Aren't you a little old to be having dreams of running away to be a pirate? Get the fuck outta here." The man says.
  "I'm not that old, I'm probably younger than you. And what difference does it make how old I am?"
  "Because this here is the Dominator and as I already pointed out, you're no sailor and we ain't got time to train you and you're not nearly young enough to act as a tag along cabin boy. The pirate shit is easy. Any thug off the street could be one. But bein' a sailor? THAT'S the hard part."
  "Are you the captain of this ship then?"
  "Oh no. I'm Zamed, the first mate. The captain of this fine vessel is Captain Illam and he's less tolerant than I am so you're not going to see him at all."
  "I have skills! I can fight! I mean I'm an accomplished thief! I'm very stealthy! I can pick almost any lock... ANY lock if given enough time!"
  "Yeah... that's not really helping you. Last thing we need is someone on our ship potentially sneaking around and pilfering hard earned loot. And as for yer fighting skills, I doubt if you were doing too much of that if you were sneaking about. I'd wager you wouldn't be much good in a boarding action or a coastal raid. You even know what its like to be in a real fight and so close to a man that when you stick your blade into him that you can smell death upon him?" Zamed says getting in your face and staring you down.
  
  "Actually I do." You say staring up at Zamed.
  
  Zamed continues to study you and then slowly moves back to his original position.
  
  "Okay... so maybe you might qualify in that regard, but that still doesn't mean shit. As I said, we only take on skilled sailors and I KNOW you aren't one of those."
  "But how am I going to learn how to be a sailor if I don't get any on experience?"
  "That's your problem, not mine."
  "Bah, this is bullshit." You say and start to walk away, but Zamed calls to you.
  
  "Look, I don't normally do this, but since you even had the balls to approach me I'll help you out. You see those docks over there? Go over to that ship and ask if they're looking for any new crew. The captain has lower standards on his ship, he might accept you." Zamed says.
  "That big one over there?"
  "Hah. No, that one is Captain Yan's vessel, and you're not getting on that one. She only accepts women. You want the smaller one. The Steadfast run by Captain Rifiv."
  "Figures."
  "Hey, that's your best shot if you're serious about this life. Besides, don't let the looks fool you. It's not called the Steadfast for nothing. Rifiv might be well past his prime, but back in his day he was nothing to sneeze at. He's probably lived longer than most his contemporaries. Anyway good luck I guess."
  
  You leave Zamed and head to the Steadfast. If this doesn't work out, you aren't sure what you're going to do next.
  
  When you get near the vessel, you see a group milling around it just talking with each other. Several of them notice you approach and one addresses you.
  
  "Looking for something?" a scruffy man wearing a rag on his head asks.
  "This is the Steadfast right? I want to join the crew." You say.
  
  They all look at each other and then the scruffy man addresses you again.
  
  "You got any skills?" he asks.
  
  You go on about your abilities the same way you did to Zamed. They don't look too impressed either, but they don't look disappointed either.
  
  "Hmm, well we've certainly had less skilled people on this vessel. We weren't actively looking for anyone new though. However, the captain doesn't tend to mind a few extra hands, so you might get lucky. Come on, let me just go take you to him. The name's Scully by the way."
  
  You follow Scully up the gangplank and wait as he knocks on the door of what you guess is the captain's cabin. He gets an answer to come in and after a couple minutes, Scully comes back out and tell you to come in as well.
  
  That's when you meet this Captain Rifiv. He's practically an old man who is having a hard time walking with a cane. He's dressed better than everyone else on the ship, but that isn't saying much since even his fancy overcoat has patches sewn on it.
  
  "So Scully says you want to join up. Also tells me your primary background was as a small time thief in Klyton and you have NO experience on the sea at all. That correct?" Captain Rifiv says.
  "Yes." You answer.
  "While the premise is still in the same family of taking other people's shit, you do realize being a pirate is a lot different than what you're used to right?"
  "I do, but I'm willing to learn."
  "Better learn quickly then, because if you fall behind or I don't think you're pulling your weight then I'll have you chopped up and thrown overboard for mermaid food. Understand?"
  "Clearly."
  "Okay, we'll see then. Scully show him where he'll be sleeping and everything else. And after you're finished doing that, gather the rest of the men because we're going to be setting off soon."
  
  Well time to see if you're cut out for this line of work.
  > time passes...
  Year 28
  
  When you joined three years ago, you figured it would be a couple months maybe. You didn't know how far away all these places you're raiding were going to be, let alone how long it would be before you returned home.
  
  The raids themselves aren't exactly fun for you either. You realize you're really not the bloodthirsty type who gets off on killing folks all the time. There's been a lot of times you've hung back just so you can avoid most of the direct combat.
  
  And that's starting to getting a bit noticeable mainly because enough of the crew has died that it can't afford to have any slackers. Fortunately Captain Rifiv hasn't called you out on it and it's just been a few of the crew bitching at you.
  
  This isn't even counting the rape and there's a lot of that you haven't been engaging in either. Though some of them seem content on buggering each other. (And no matter how long you've been at sea, you can honestly say there's nothing that would even make you THINK about sticking it to any of this loathsome lot you're with!)
  
  The only minor upside is you've been doing okay as far as loot is concerned. These idiots haven't been paying attention that you've been pilfering the odd coins or baubles from them so you actually have more than your share. However, you aren't exactly doing all that much better than you were as a regular thief though and worse, you're stuck at sea most of the time so you can't even enjoy it like you'd prefer.
  
  There's also the fact that you've learned your way around a ship a lot more, though you question if this knowledge would actually ever be useful since you're having serious doubts about ever setting foot on another ship ever again.
  
  Currently you're somewhere in the far southwest seas at some small port town called Gix. The Steadfast has been using the place as a rest stop in between raids mainly because it's the only civilized place in this area that is accepting of pirates and has been for as long as anyone can remember.
  
  This place isn't Hessla though and isn't a "criminal town." It's just run by normal people going about their simple normal lives. The locals are a bit live and let live for the most part. They don't particularly enjoy having violent drunken pirates visiting, but as long as the pirates aren't messing with them, they're fine with accommodating them.
  
  Sort of reminds you of how Teckleville used to turn a blind eye to you and your sister robbing travelling merchants.
  
  You miss those days and not even the robbing part. You find that you're missing home in general. Maybe not even home so much you miss the environment as strange as that might seem. Then again, you never had the wanderlust that your sister had. (You imagine other than the killing and rape, she'd find all this pirate stuff pretty exciting) Had things been different you probably would have never left Teckleville.
  
  Maybe you would have eventually settled down and become boring like everyone else in that town. At this point that doesn't seem all that bad. You guess you're just realizing that you're starting to get tired of this life.
  
  Since you're hanging out with the Steadfast crew most of the time, you always take the opportunity to stay away from the lot of them when in town. Instead of drinking at the "pirate bar" of the town, you drink at the quieter one that the locals seem to prefer.
  
  The first time you entered you got a lot of strange looks, but now nobody bats an eye. You're just minding your business after all. Still, occasionally the barmaid speaks to you and is fairly cordial. Seems to be in a more talkative mood today... 
  
  "Another successful voyage of raiding and pillaging?" Ola asks.
  "I suppose so. Got enough money to spend here." You answer.
  "Drinking does seem to be one of the more civilized favorite past times of you lot. Good thing of course since we'd have significantly less coin coming into the town. Sort of wondering though, how come you always come in here rather than going to the usual taverns?"
  "Because I have to spend practically all my time around those assholes, so the moment I actually don't have to is a blessing."
  "If you don't like the folks you sail with, why do it?"
  "Good question, and one I've been asking myself more and more each day before finally coming to the inevitable conclusion."
  "Which is?"
  "That this pirate life isn't for me. As soon as we get back to Hessla, I'm not setting foot on a ship again. (Sigh) Another year at sea though before we return... ugh... I just dunno if I can take it."
  "Well, why not just leave now?"
  "... hmmm... I suppose I could... I doubt if they'd come looking for me. Do you have any transport ships that go to Hessla?"
  
  Ola frowns a bit.
  
  "We don't have ANY big ships. In case you haven't realized, we're a small town not a bustling trading city we hear you lot talk about. If it weren't for pirates coming here, we probably would never have much contact with the rest of the world. I mean the best you could do is get yourself a rowboat and row to this Hessla place. How far is it?" Ola asks.
  "Too far. I doubt if I could even make it to Jicol in a rowboat. Oh well, guess I can tough out another year." You say.
  "Why not just stay here?"
  "Here? What would I do here?"
  "Um, well you know your way around a ship right? You could work as a fisherman."
  "Ugh, trying to get away from boats actually. Still, sitting in a rowboat and peacefully fishing sounds a lot more attractive right now than what I am doing."
  "What are some of your other skills... um, I mean those that don't involve killing and raping people."
  "First off, I've never raped anyone... " you start to say before Ola interrupts.
  "You haven't? Oh thank Kalhu!"
  
  You give Ola a bit of a strange look. Granted you two don't really know each other that well, but she seems way more talkative than she has in the past. If you didn't know any better you'd say she was flirting with you in some strange way.
  
  "Okay, first who is Kalhu?" you ask.
  "The god of this island of course. All the times you've been here, you've never heard of him before?" Ola says.
  "Don't really pay much attention to religion. You're not going to preach at me are you?"
  "No, why would I?'
  "Because you seem very interested in my future and we don't know each other very well, so I'm wondering what this is all about."
  
  Ola looks around and finally sits down next to you. A couple people look, but say nothing, you're a little taken back by all this though.
  
  "This town is a good place with good people. We like our relative isolation, especially after hearing some of the tales from your pirate shipmates and other pirates we've dealt with in the past. But um... isolation has its downsides. There sometimes is um... lack of potential mates. At least not related ones." Ola says.
  
  You start to tense up at where this might be going.
  
  "Now some women of this town have sex with the pirates that visit here and that's good as it provides new blood for the town, but it is sometimes hard on these mothers to raise these children without a father around. A good family should have a mother and father." Ola says.
  "So... what exactly are you asking me?"
  "I'm asking if you would consider... (breathes nervously) being my husband."
  
  You had a feeling, but you still weren't quite prepared. How could you be? It isn't like you get asked out of the blue to be someone's husband!
  
  Ola goes on to explain that she knows how this might seem strange to an outsider like you, but she says that she fears her arranged marriage to her cousin since he has many undesirable physical traits that would not make for a strong child.
  
  However, she also doesn't wish to submit herself to a one-night stand with some pirate (Apparently she's a bit on the moral side which is funny that she would come to you in the first place) and wants a husband to stick around to help raise your children. (Yes, she's already implied that she wants more than one.)
  
  So she's picked you as a "last ditch" effort to find a husband who is physically fit (and attractive as she has mentioned as a secondary concern) and is most assuredly not related to her in some way. She also has said in the few conversations you've had with her you seem okay personality wise and not being a rapist is a big plus to her. (Curse your parents for instilling some sort of values in you)
  
  For her part, Ola seems like a nice girl and isn't ugly. She's no Annah or Yvette, but you could certainly do worse.
  
  You're a bit overwhelmed by all this sudden information though and as much as you don't want to get back on the Steadfast again, that's only going to be a year. This is going to be well... presumably until you die because she's already made it quite clear that passage off this island is a rarity.
  
  You probably wouldn't see home again.
  
  But then again what did you really have going on there? You tried being a thief and that didn't work out like you planned. You tried this pirate thing and that hasn't worked out either. All you've gotten is headache from your life of crime and not much to show for it ultimately. Also you don't really have a home anymore anyway seeing as you got permanently kicked out of Teckleville.
  
  That thought about you finally giving all this up and becoming a normal boring person? Well that day might be today.
  > get married
  It's crazy and maybe you're going to severely regret this later, but getting married and out of this life sounds a whole hell of a lot better than getting on that ship for another year.
  
  "Fuck it, let's do it." You say.
  "Seriously?" Ola asks a little surprised.
  "Yeah, I'm serious. Where and when is this going to happen?"
  "Uh, well when I get off work in a little while we could go to the temple of Kalhu. The shaman should be able to perform the ceremony."
  "So we don't need your parents there or anything?"
  "No, all we need to be is bonded in the many eyes of Kalhu. This is great! This is really wonderful!" Ola beams.
  
  You still have a few questions even though because while you're half way committing to this, there is still time to back out if it's too crazy.
  
  "Um, okay, but wait I do need to ask. This isn't going to piss off your family is it? I mean you were engaged to your cousin, I don't want to cause some family drama or feud."
  "Well I suppose my cousin will be upset, but you hardly have to worry about him. He's not really fit and strong like you are. His mother might also be upset, but as far as my family goes you shouldn't have too many problems. My father might be gruff with you, but his main concern is if you're going to be a good provider. Now did you do anything before being a pirate?"
  
  You explain to Ola some of your past, which causes another frown from her. However when you get past all the thief stuff and briefly mention dealing with some wildlife for Dr. Gossey she stops you.
  
  "Wait, so you have experience trapping and dealing with fauna?" Ola asks.
  "Well I wouldn't say that exactly. I mean I had a pet qweepa, but that's because I had it from when it was a baby. And I had to collect these monster snail crab eggs." You say.
  "That may be good enough. My cousin is a trapper and needs help sometimes keeping the pest population down in this town. He can teach you all you need to know. You could probably work with him."
  "Won't that be weird considering I'm marrying you?"
  "Huh? Oh no, this is a different cousin and he's married to my older sister so there won't be any trouble there."
  "Oh. Well that's good to hear, I guess."
  
  Ola goes on excitedly about how she will be a good wife to you and believes that Kalhu must have sent you personally to reward her for her prayers to him. This is all getting a little too "real" for you and you tell her that you need to get a few things from the ship, but this makes her nervous.
  
  "You're coming back right?" she asks.
  "I'm coming back, don't worry. I just really need to get the rest of my belongings off the ship. I mean I have a tidy hidden sum still aboard the ship, if I'm staying I don't want to just abandon that." You say.
  "... okay I trust you. But please hurry back!" Ola says and then kisses you on the lips.
  
  She then walks away with a smile, but it's very apparent she's concerned you are leaving.
  
  And honestly you're wondering if you should.
  
  You leave the tavern and quickly make your way back to the ship. You pace the floor of the empty cabin still wondering what the hell you're going to do. You feel really bad for just leaving Ola. She didn't really deserve getting her hopes up, only to get them destroyed. But... 
  
  Getting married? Being a pest trapper? Settling down and having a whole mess o babies? What the hell were you thinking?
  
  "Hey, didn't expect anyone to be aboard, well except the captain and he's always in his quarters." One of your fatter crewmates says as he comes wandering in the door.
  
  "Hey you seen my lucky dice? Gotta game with Fleegle and Hok an' those dice never let me down yet." He asks.
  "No." you say still lost in your own thoughts.
  "Meh, no matter, those two idiots got the worst luck anyway. I'll easily take them like I took that long haired lass on the last ship we raided, hahahahaha!"
  
  You continue to pace and think, but this asshole keeps insisting on speaking to you.
  
  "What's crawled up yer ass and got you all jittery? Yer about to wear a hole in the floor." He asks.
  "Nothing." You say.
  "Doesn't look like nothin' to me. You worrying about all the mermaid rumors in these southern waters? Listen I've been at sea long before you were even unleashed from yer father's balls and I ain't never seen a mermaid. They don't even fucking exist... "
  "Will you just shut the fuck up?! I don't give a shit about what you have to fucking say! I got my own problems!" you snap.
  
  The fat pirate's demeanor now changes to hostility.
  
  "You fucking little cunt. Don't think I won't kick the shit out of you and throw you overboard after I'm done shoving my big fat cock up yer prissy ass. I see you walkin' around here thinkin' yer too good for this life and keepin' to yerself. And that's fine, but I also see that YOU haven't been pullin' yer fuckin' weight around here. Whenever we go on a raid, you stay in the back like a fucking bitch. Well let me tell you something, the next raid we go on, I better see some fucking bloodshed or I'm gonna make good on my previous threat."
  
  This fat ass is twice your size and you don't have much room to move around. You back down.
  
  "Alright, alright, apologies. Just a little preoccupied with something and I didn't mean to take it out on you." You say holding your hands up and stepping back. The fat pirate smirks and snorts in distain at your compliance.
  
  And it's at that moment you've made your choice.
  
  As soon as he turns his back, you punch the fat fuck as hard as you can in the base of his skull. The big man being unprepared for this crumples into the lowest hanging hammock and then you do it again. You aren't sure if you've killed him, but he's not moving. No matter, they'll probably think he's just asleep for awhile.
  
  "All that time at sea and you never learned not to turn your back on a thief. Stupid fat asshole." You say.
  
  You quickly gather up your belongings, loot the body of your dead crewmate and leave the ship. Fortunately you don't bump into any other crewmembers or the captain on your way out.
  
  You return to the tavern where Ola works. She's busy at the moment, but smiles when she sees you. While you wait for her shift to be over, you go through your small bag of valuables (as well as your newly acquired one) and try to find something to give to her. With a bit more luck on your side, you manage to find a gold ring. Probably not her size, but it's the thought that counts.
  
  Later that night, you and Ola go to the temple of Kalhu. The shaman there is a bit strange and so is the ceremony, but happily it's not that long. Within just a half hour, you're married and you soon find out that Ola's years of purity have paid off in your favor because apparently she had A LOT of pent up... "energy." You don't even make it that far out the temple before she's ready to consummate the marriage! Certainly no complaint on that front at least.
  
  Over the course of the next few days you mainly hideout at Ola's cousin's home (The pest trapper, not the one you just stole his bride to be from) since you're a little concerned that your fellow crewmates are going to come looking for you. However, they either don't give a shit that you killed fat ass, or they still think he's asleep. Either way, they ultimately leave without you and you're finally in the clear.
  
  You aren't exactly religious yourself, but you do give a little silent praise to Yag for your incredible fortune over these last few days. You just hope if he IS watching over you even to the smallest degree that your luck doesn't suddenly turn to shit for your brand new life.
  
  And it is a brand new life now. You're married and on your way to be just some boring normal person in some boring small town that was much like the one you got run out of over a decade ago. Not to mention you'll most likely live out the rest of your life and die here.
  
  But that's okay. Things could be a lot worse. Who knows, maybe you'll even still find a little excitement here and there even if it is of the mundane kind. This is after all a whole different experience for you to discover and enjoy if you can.
  
  Whatever happens, your days as a rogue are over.