text: > Look around
  An incredible ... squadron? troupe?... of bats is converged on the delicious, fragant body of a snake, and are rapidly consuming it. A window has a view of the swamp outside, and there are doorways to the west and northwest. A rope dangles from a hole in the ceiling.
  
  You can see a heap of bats fighting over a snake on a stick here.
  
  > look at the hole
  The hole, through which the rope dangles, leads to the next level of the temple. And, it must be said, it doesn't appear that there are any carnivorous bats there. So it has that going for it.
  
  The bats have finished eating, and quickly return to their previous roosts.
  
  > examine the window
  The view out the window reveals mile after mile of the tops of the Everglade trees.
  
  > climb the rope
  You try to ascend the rope, and make it about halfway, quickly hurrying hand over hand. Until one hand comes down on a bat. And then a bat comes down on your hand. And then many bats descend upon all parts of your body. And your body descends (rapidly) to the floor. And then the squeaking, nipping, feeding frenzy starts.
  
  > Inventory
  Your ill-fated action draws the attention of the bats. The bats notice that you're made of meat. Delicious meat? They decide to find out.
  
  > throw the snake
  You toss the snake onto the ground. At first, nothing happens. Then the bats notice the snake. First one flutters down, then, two, then nearly all of the bats are converging in a heap, fighting over the meal.
  The aroma of the burnt snake permeates the room, and soon every last one of the bats joins the pile. One of the last bats to move reveals a shining golden treasure.
  
  > get the treasure
  You quickly snag the treasure, while the bats are preoccupied. Congratulationment!® number 16 - "You collected a valuable(?) treasure".
  
  > go northwest
  With the bats distracted (for now), you scurry out the northwestern archway.
  
  The Top of a Bottomless Pit (Not a Topless Pit, Obviously)
  A path of marked handholds leads down into the pit, and nothing leads up - you're at the top. You're on a small thrust of wood that extends out over the pit. There are two exits, a metal door to the south and a dark, grimy arch to the southeast. The doors stand, free of obstruction.
  
  > climb the rope
  Congratulationment!® number 17 - "Rope day in gym class would be easier, if you were running from bats."
  
  A Completely Normal (If Paleolithic Evil Temples Can Be Normal)
  Room
  Well, that's a nice change from bottomless pits, gargoyles, bats, grotesque statues, et cetera. This rooms appears to be entirely normal. The floor is normal. The walls are normal. There is a window out of the temple, with a view of the jungle. A rope dangles down to Bat Country, from which emanates excited squeaking. That's not normal. But it really should count against the normalcy of the room below, not this room. To the west is a doorway, that appears to lead to an entirely normal bathroom.
  
  Someone has left a large collection of impressive steel pipes here. Complete with flashing lights, dials and switches.
  
  > look at the pipes
  You have no idea what this machinery is, or what it does. But you know one thing - when confronted with strange machinery, of unknown provenance in a strange temple, you ABSOLUTELY do not touch it. So why do you find your finger sneaking out to turn a dial, or perhaps flip a switch, before you regain your senses and snatch your hand back?
  
  > go west
  Alright, this is creepy. Both because this bathroom is unmistakably evil, now that you see it up close, and because there is a bathroom in an ancient evil temple. The most notable feature of the bathroom is the giant bathtub alongside the far wall. Other than that, there are the standard (evil) bathroom fixtures. Mirror (inscribed with inscrutable sigils), sink (filled to the brim with blood) and toilet (reeking of death and bad choices). To the east is the completely normal room, and set in the ceiling is a door marked with a strange heiroglyph.
  
  > look in the mirror
  You find nothing of interest. Like usual. But adventurers are eternally optimistic!
  
  > look at the mirror
  You see yourself, but not as you normally see yourself. As others see you. What you normally see as a dashing demeanor comes across as pompous. That cheeky grin is a sneer. And your hair looks incredibly strange parted on the other side.
  
  > look at the sink
  The sink is full of blood. That's probably the most pertinent detail. Other than that, it's a stone basin.
  
  > examine the toilet
  The toilet is creepy, as indoor plumbing is a relatively recent innovation. And by relatively recent, we are definitely excluding ancient stone temples.
  
  > look at the hieroglyph
  The language of this hieroglyph has been dead for centuries, which is ironic. Because it means "The Water of Life".
  
  > examine the bathtub
  The giant tub is alongside the far wall. It is about waist high on you, and very sturdy looking. The tub is full of water, making it impossibly heavy. But perhaps this is the famed Water of Life? Probably not - it's very murky. Through the murk, you can just make out a drain.
  
  > examine the drain
  It's what keeps the water in the tub. Or lets it out.
  
  > Drain bathtub
  You pull the drain, and the water in the tub quickly rushes out, over the floor, quickly seeping into cracks. Hopefully *that* wasn't the Water of Life.
  
  > examine the tub
  The giant tub is alongside the far wall. It is about waist high on you, and very sturdy looking. The tub is now drained, and can appears to be several thousand pounds lighter - perhaps light enough to move.
  
  > get the tub
  That's hardly portable.
  
  > move the tub
  You heave and shove and manhandle the tub, and finally manage to get it right to the center of the room. Whereupon the trapdoor opens, spilling you into the room below, and leaving the tub teetering on the edge above you.
  
  You fall nearly on top of the sarcophagus, and twist off in an clumsy gainer, landing on the heap of broken sticks, which break your fall.
  
  Everything is coated in a layer of soot - and for good reason! But you can make out a pile of sticks surrounding a stone sarcophagus, raised on an altar in the middle of the chamber. Around the walls there are bright nozzles, whose purpose is now obvious. Above the sarcophagus, a trapdoor swings, open. To the north and east there are metal doors.
  
  Congratulationment!® number 18 - "Tub thumpin'!"
  
  > go west
  You quickly scurry out the western door, slamming it behind you to avoid the bats.
  
  Everything is coated in a layer of soot - and for good reason! But you can make out a pile of sticks surrounding a stone sarcophagus, raised on an altar in the middle of the chamber. Around the walls there are bright nozzles, whose purpose is now obvious. Above the sarcophagus, a trapdoor swings, open. To the north and east there are metal doors.
  
  > examine the trapdoor
  An open trapdoor swings above the sarcophagus, invitingly within reach - if you were to stand on the sarcophagus.
  
  > get on the sarcophagus
  You get into the sarcophagus.
  
  A thin fluid begins to leak from the metal discs, and the smell of the room markedly increases.
  
  > Go upward
  Crawling on top of the sarcophagus, and thence to the trapdoor, you re-enter the floor above.
  
  The most notable feature is the fact that the floor in the center of the room is missing. Well, it's not exactly missing. It's on a hinge, and has swung down into the room below. The second most notable feature of the room is the giant bathtub in the center of the room, right on the edge of the trap door. Other than that, there are the standard (evil) bathroom fixtures. Mirror (inscribed with inscrutable sigils), sink (filled to the brim with blood) and toilet (reeking of death and bad choices). To the east is the completely normal room, and set in the ceiling is a door marked with a strange heiroglyph.
  
  > look at the hieroglyph
  The language of this hieroglyph has been dead for centuries, which is ironic. Because it means "The Water of Life".
  
  > get in the bathtub
  It would be hard to bathe yourself in an empty tub. Unless you were a mime. Then it would be too easy.
  
  > Go east
  A Completely Normal (If Paleolithic Evil Temples Can Be Normal)
  Room
  This rooms appears to be entirely normal. The floor is normal. The walls are normal. There is a window out of the temple, with a view of the jungle. A rope dangles down to Bat Country, from which emanates excited squeaking. That's not normal. But it really should count against the normalcy of the room below, not this room. To the west is a doorway, that appears to lead to an entirely normal bathroom. Alright, a bathroom in a temple is also not normal. But again... should that count against THIS room?
  
  Someone has left a large collection of impressive steel pipes here. Complete with flashing lights, dials and switches.
  
  You find yourself absently fingering a dial on the machinery.
  
  > turn dial
  You go to mess with the contraption, but then stop yourself. Who knows what could happen?
  
  > flip the switch
  You find yourself strangely drawn, compelled, even, to fiddle with the machinery. You quickly stay your hand before you can do anything. Strange compulsions in mysterious temples are never any good.
  
  The machinery emits a strange, low hiss.
  
  > check your inventory
  You're carrying a Golden Banana, a spool of twine, a metal pirate hook, a greasy bone, a whip and a gun. You are wearing the metal gauntlet, the battered fedora and an old leather jacket.
  
  You find yourself absently fingering a dial on the machinery.
  
  > Whip machinery
  You can't help it. You start flipping switches and pressing buttons like a mad man. There is a building noise that starts as a rattle, strengthens to a shriek, then ends in a clamorous roar as the machinery jitters and shakes. Finally, the noises cease, and a small vessel is thrust at you.
  
  > get the vessel
  Taken.
  
  > examine it
  You don't know how it was done, but this beverage is the almost complete opposite of tea.
  
  You get a creepy feeling. Probably for no reason.
  
  > Drink beverage
  No thank you. You prefer tea.
  
  You find yourself absently fingering a dial on the machinery.
  
  > go west
  The most notable feature is the fact that the floor in the center of the room is missing. Well, it's not exactly missing. It's on a hinge, and has swung down into the room below. The second most notable feature of the room is the giant bathtub in the center of the room, right on the edge of the trap door. Other than that, there are the standard (evil) bathroom fixtures. Mirror (inscribed with inscrutable sigils), sink (filled to the brim with blood) and toilet (reeking of death and bad choices). To the east is the completely normal room, and set in the ceiling is a door marked with a strange heiroglyph.
  
  > look at the mirror
  You see yourself, but not as you normally see yourself. As others see you. What you normally see as a dashing demeanor comes across as pompous. That cheeky grin is a sneer. And your hair looks incredibly strange parted on the other side.
  
  > show the tea to the mirror
  You can only do that to something animate.
  
  > examine the sigils
  You glance at the sigils. They are in some alien alphabet, full of jagged edges and lines that should intersect, but somehow don't. You find your tongue moving of its own accord as you scan the letters, and yank your gaze away.
  
  > Drain sink
  No thank you. The stopper is probably underneath all that blood.
  Ick.
  
  > throw the tea at the hieroglyph
  Futile.
  
  > Inventory
  You're carrying a drink unlike tea, a Golden Banana, a spool of twine, a metal pirate hook, a greasy bone, a whip and a gun. You are wearing the metal gauntlet, the battered fedora and an old leather jacket.
  
  > look at the tub
  The giant tub teeters on the edge of the trap door, but seems relatively sturdy, if you're careful about it. Standing on it should provide enough reach to get to the door in the ceiling. The tub is now drained, and can appears to be several thousand pounds lighter - perhaps light enough to move.
  
  > Open ceiling
  How? There's nowhere to get a grip on the door.
  
  You can't see any such thing.
  
  > open the door with the hook
  (a metal pirate hook)
  That doesn't seem to be something you can unlock.
  
  > Whip door
  You crack your whip at the door in the ceiling, slapping it fruitlessly against the blank wood. Perhaps if there was something for the whip to grip onto?
  
  > throw the hook at the door
  (a metal pirate hook at the door in the ceiling)
  Futile.
  
  > examine the door
  The door set in the ceiling lies waiting for you. Surely you must be near the apex of the temple, and your destiny, by now. There appears to be no really good way to get a grip on the door and open it (though there is a small hole where it appears a doorknob used to be).
  
  > put the hook in the hole
  (a metal pirate hook in the door in the ceiling)
  You climb atop the tub, being careful to not teeter it into the gaping trapdoor, and, standing on your tiptoes, you screw the hook into the soft wood of the ceiling door.
  
  > put the hook in the hole
  (first taking the door in the ceiling)
  
  That's hardly portable.
  
  > open the door
  You can barely reach the hook, standing on your tiptoes on the edge of the tub. But reach it you do, and yank the door in the ceiling open. An ominous silence greets you from the room above. Funny. You expected Handel's Messiah.
  
  Congratulationment!® number 19 - "Almost there... almost there!"
  
  > go up
  You climb on top of the tub, and carefully pull yourself up and through the door on the ceiling.
  
  This is it. The culmination of your adventure. The culmination, indeed of the Temple. A beam of light spears through the air and spotlights a simple pedestal of pure white marble. Atop the pedestal there is a deep basin, and in the basin - this must be the Water of Life. An unearthly blue glow emanates from the water, bathing the rest of the room in rippling azure light. In the floor there is the door to the lower levels of the temple, but you can't think of going back - not with the end of your quest in sight.
  
  Congratulationment!® number 21 - "King of the world, top of the heap!"
  
  There is a commotion in the room below this one - you peek down through the trapdoor. Bats! The bats have seemingly followed you up the temple, and are circling wildly below (perhaps they are distracted by the sink full of blood). But it is only a matter of time before they start flying into this room...
  
  > close the door
  Acting quickly, you slam the trapdoor closed and throw its bolt, locking it. Unfortunately, you were not quick enough - one of the bats slipped through. It brushes your face with a wingtip as you duck out of the way. With a blood curdling screech, the bat starts circling the ceiling of the room, giant wings flapping.
  
  Congratulationment!® number 22 - "Were you raised in a barn?"
  
  > Drink water
  You drink from the Water of Life, and feel it coursing through your veins, healing your injuries, curing your poison, righting what once went wrong. You feel like a million bucks. You feel like you want to drink more, or bathe in it!
  
  Congratulationment!® number 25 - "Thirsty?"
  
  > bathe in Water
  You attempt to bathe in the Water of Life, but the bat swoops at your neck and tries to sever it your head from your shoulders. Hurriedly, you knock it off, and back away from the basin.
  
  > Whip Bat
  You crack your whip at the bat. Great, that just drew its attention.
  
  The bat seems to have regained its sense of purpose, and begins circling above your head ominously.
  
  > check what you're carrying
  You're carrying a drink unlike tea, a Golden Banana, a spool of twine, a greasy bone, a whip and a gun. You are wearing the metal gauntlet, the battered fedora and an old leather jacket.
  
  The bat flaps overhead, waiting for its opportunity to strike.
  
  > examine the jacket
  The coat has served you well. Perhaps that's why you wear it, even in the sweltering jungle heat. It's zipped open, which makes more sense in Florida, at least.
  
  In an old leather jacket is a bundle of maps.
  
  Scree, scree, scree, flap, flap, flap.
  
  > throw the gun at the Bat
  You lack the nerve when it comes to the crucial moment.
  
  The bat makes a feint at your jugular.
  
  > hit the Bat with the gun
  It would be nice. But the gun is completely empty of bullets.
  
  The bat flaps overhead, waiting for its opportunity to strike.
  
  > throw the bone
  Dropped.
  
  The bat screeches, nearly shattering your eardrums.
  
  The bat swoops in at you, and takes a nip out of your neck. You think you'll be okay... until the blood from your carotid starts fountaining out.
  
  > look at Bat
  This bat somehow seems both bigger and more malevolent than the other bats. Which is peculiar, because the bats were already large and malevolent as it was.
  
  > throw Banana at the Bat
  You lack the nerve when it comes to the crucial moment.
  
  > throw the bone in Water
  That can't contain things.
  
  The bat seems to have regained its sense of purpose, and begins circling above your head ominously.
  
  > Xyzzy
  *Poof!*
  
  You find yourself in a wondrous cave. At least you assume it's wondrous. It's dark, and you have no light source. You may be eaten by a grue.
  
  *Poof!* ...that wore off quickly.
  
  Congratulationment!® number 28 - "Text Adventure Veteran."
  
  The bat swoops towards you, but you duck out of the way.
  
  > look at the Bat
  This bat somehow seems both bigger and more malevolent than the other bats. Which is peculiar, because the bats were already large and malevolent as it was.
  
  The bat makes a feint at your jugular.
  
  > examine the fedora
  Yeah, you know exactly what this hat looks like. After all, it is YOUR hat, right?
  
  The bat flaps overhead, waiting for its opportunity to strike.
  
  > get the Bat
  I don't suppose an enraged giant bat would care for that.
  
  The bat swoops towards you, but you duck out of the way.
  
  The bat swoops in at you, and takes a nip out of your neck. You think you'll be okay... until the blood from your carotid starts fountaining out.
  
  > throw the tea at the Bat
  You lack the nerve when it comes to the crucial moment.
  
  The bat swoops towards you, but you duck out of the way.
  
  The bat swoops in at you, and takes a nip out of your neck. You think you'll be okay... until the blood from your carotid starts fountaining out.
  
  > open the door
  Foolishly, ignoring your better instincts, you open the trapdoor. Almost immediately after throwing open the bolt, the door flies up under the pressure of the bat bodies slamming against it, knocking you backwards, into the wall. Your breath is knocked from you, and you are thus at a disadvantage when the bats descend upon you.
  
  > Punch bat
  You flail at the bat, ineffectively, with your fists. Rule one of boxing: don't try to box airborne opponents.
  
  The bat divebombs at you, fangs bared, but jukes away at the last minute.
  
  The bat swoops in at you, and takes a nip out of your neck. You think you'll be okay... until the blood from your carotid starts fountaining out.
  
  > Whip Bat
  You crack your whip at the bat. Great, that just drew its attention.
  
  > Whip Water
  You crack your whip at the water. That'll show it.
  
  > examine pedestal
  The pedestal is made of pure white marble, and seems to have been molded- formed? birthed? - complete and whole. There is not a chisel mark upon it.
  
  > take basin
  That's hardly portable.
  
  The bat seems to have regained its sense of purpose, and begins circling above your head ominously.
  
  > Examine beam
  The beam of light enters through a crystal block placed at the apex of the room - the apex of the apex, really. The crystal absorbs the rays of the sun, and concentrates them into an almost blinding shaft of light, which then pierces the air of the room, almost setting the dust motes ablaze, until it spotlights the marble pedestal, making the pure white stone seem to radiate, itself.
  
  The bat screeches, nearly shattering your eardrums.
  
  > look at the crystal
  The block of crystal is the real apex of the temple, occuring as it does at the top of the room. It is here that the rays of the sun are focused into a beam of light, and that light directed down to the pedestal.
  
  The bat screeches, nearly shattering your eardrums.
  
  > get in the beam
  That's not something you can enter.
  
  Scree, scree, scree, flap, flap, flap.
  
  > get in Water
  You attempt to bathe in the Water of Life, but the bat swoops at your neck and tries to sever it your head from your shoulders. Hurriedly, you knock it off, and back away from the basin.
  
  The bat's eyes glow with a pure red light. Is that possible?
  
  > put all in Water
  drink unlike tea: That can't contain things.
  Golden Banana: That can't contain things.
  a spool of twine: That can't contain things.
  whip: That can't contain things.
  gun: You dunk the gun into the water, which is generally against the operating procedure for guns, but it can't hurt, right? And lo, the glow in the water flouresces about your gun, and it suddenly feels just a tiny bit heavier - as if it has de-aged back to the time when it had a single bullet in it.
  
  Congratulationment!® number 23 - "Water pistol!"
  a greasy bone: That can't contain things.
  
  Scree, scree, scree, flap, flap, flap.
  
  The bat swoops in at you, and takes a nip out of your neck. You think you'll be okay... until the blood from your carotid starts fountaining out.
  
  > Xyzzy
  *Poof!*
  
  You find yourself in a wondrous cave. At least you assume it's wondrous. It's dark, and you have no light source. You may be eaten by a grue.
  
  *Poof!* ...that wore off quickly.
  
  Congratulationment!® number 28 - "Text Adventure Veteran."
  
  > throw the gun in Water
  You dunk the gun into the water, which is generally against the operating procedure for guns, but it can't hurt, right? And lo, the glow in the water flouresces about your gun, and it suddenly feels just a tiny bit heavier - as if it has de-aged back to the time when it had a single bullet in it.
  
  Congratulationment!® number 23 - "Water pistol!"
  
  > shoot bat
  (with the gun)
  You take careful aim, and fire the gun straight into the bat's heart. With a screech, it plummets - directly into the basin filled with the Water of Life! You rush to the basin, and peer in - but the bat is gone. Did it de-age itself to death? Is that even POSSIBLE?
  
  Congratulationment!® number 24 - "Violence was the answer to this one."
  
  > bathe in Water
  You splash handfuls of the water over yourself, then double handfuls, faster and faster, reaching deeper and deeper into the basin, until you feel yourself fall in, pulled under the water, the unearthly blue glow building around you...
  glow building around you...## A Bar, Three Days Ago, On the Outskirts of the Everglades
  The bar extends the length of the room, and the ceiling fans and lone bartender are equally overworked by the rough and tumble crowd. Alligator ranchers, adventurers and native guides rub shoulders the entire length of the bar, shouting at the bartender, waving grubby fistfuls of money and pointing at the grimy bottles on display along the back shelf. To the east lies the exit of the bar, though the humid swamp air blowing in from that direction makes it not too tempting.
  
  A man with a snaggly-toothed smile is here, bargaining with you.
  
  "My friend!" says the man, "Let me tell you, if you want to venture into the Everglades, you will need a canoe!"
  
  > ask the man about the canoe
  You smile, and reply "Sure I do, bub. And can you run me a deal on a couple of boxes of bullets?"
  
  Congratulationment!® number 26 - "I hope the 'AMUSING' section is good..."