text: [Themes: grimdark fantasy, villain protagonist, socially important, grimdark, fantasy]
  
  Darkness drapes the central room of the temple, an ever-present curtain. You smile; the disciples have been following your bidding correctly. The darker the room, the more potent the magicks—that teaching isn't bullshit whatsoever. As you near the pulpit, you trip over a loose stone in the floor, and nearly collapse onto a jagged obsidian-backed pew. Unfortunately, you have not yet gotten any of those wonderful night vision concoctions: you still need a number of corpses to trade to the alchemist, seeing as you lack money (or at least that's what you told him).
  
  "I really should've added the obsidian spikes after we figured out how to see," you think out loud. No one else is at the temple this early. Your faithful minions are probably busy self-flagellating or gobbling up those scriptures you keep feeding them.
  
  Somewhere, glass shatters. Looks like you might have company. You hear it clear as day, but can't determine where it came from. The wonderful acoustics are both a blessing and a curse. The shattering is quickly followed by a slow and determined cacophany of clanking, thundering footfalls. It could be a mercenary troupe, which gives you an opening to simply escape. Mercenary units are generally low in numbers, which means they probably can't have the temple surrounded, but they would still completely destroy you in a fight. Could also be paladins, and that's about as bad as it can get for you. They're certainly righteous and good, which is the exact antithesis of what you are. They're also very enthusiastic about their work, which also doesn't bode well for those on the wrong side of their glistening steel. And if this is the Inquisition brand of paladins, then you're trapped in here; the temple would certainly be surrounded by this point. The stairs to the basement demon summoning chambers are oddly beckoning right now, but some simple mechanical traps have no chance of failing, or of raping, killing, and eating you (not necessarily in that order). The temple is also a winding array of dark hallways, darker corners, and somehow even darker closets. You could probably find a sufficiently hidden spot quite quickly, but you would be totally defenseless if they were to find you, and it's all dependent on how thoroughly they search for you.
  
  > Demons
  Your teachings dictate that demons are misunderstood beings, simply wanting to enjoy the fun company of humans. You know that this teaching is complete, and utter, bullshit. A minor demon lord simply gave you a hefty sum of gold to include it in your holy texts. If even one poor soul creates a proper planar rift, the lord will be satisfied with the profit.
  
  As you grab an assortment of multi-colored candles from a rotting wooden chest in the back of the central prayer hall, you gulp; you never thought that poor soul would be you. You take your copy of Daemonology for Complete Retards along with you. The incantations contained within the human-skin-bound book are also firmly in your memory, but when dealing with demons, safe is easy, and well, safe, while sorry is really really absolutely fucking catastrophically bad.
  
  Heading down the cold stone of the stairs, you enter the basement. No one has ever lifted a finger to clean this room, as the stone must be kept well-lubricated with various essential oils to serve as a suitable planar entryway (and while you wish this was another bullshit teaching, it's actually a magical necessity). These oils also provide a perfect nesting ground for all sorts of brownish-greenery. The whole level is abound with fungus, mold, and other "life" that you can't even classify. Thankfully the oils serve yet another purpose; they're able to fend off the swarms of pestilent insects that would otherwise take up every square inch of this nutrient-rich environment. So now you're stuck with this oil-coated room for an eternity, because otherwise the plants will decay, and the bugs will arrive.
  
  Treading carefully past a cluster of mushrooms that are practically poisonous to look at, you turn a corner and enter the primary summoning zone. Here, the rocky floor is engraved with a complex pattern of arcane glyphs. A pentagram, of course, with the addition of a nonagon, thirteen perfectly straight lines, and a few circles for good measure.
  
  You lay down the book and open it up, but place the candles without even looking at it. You light the wicks, and watch for a moment as they slowly dwindle, just as your time does. Now, you pick up the book. The incantations are still, word by word, in your memory, but the blood on the pages gives you hope. You could summon a mob of weaker demons, which are wild and most likely uncontrollable, but are less likely to cause any lasting damage on the plane. You could also summon a Greater Demon, who can be controlled (not a lot), can be reasoned with, but could potentially cause significantly more damage to you and everything in the city and perhaps everything in this very plane of existence and maybe even beyond that. What page do you flip to?
  
  > One Greater Demon
  You flip to a page near the back of the book. It has a skull and crossbones symbol, underneath which is written "DANGER" in big block letters. Anything written in a book made out of human skin with ink of human blood is implied to be dangerous, so when this book is saying that something is dangerous, it has to be something that is pure, unadulterated danger. You turn to the next page, trying to keep your eyes from lingering on the smatterings of blood—some of which is certainly not human—in the margins
  
  You sigh; others in your position would sigh for fear of the terrible heresy they're about to commit, while others would sigh simply because they're scared for their lives. You, however, are sighing because—no, you're also just scared shitless. You take a deep, controlled breath, and begin the incense waving, wild gesticulating, and operatic chanting. After a few exhausting minutes for your arms and your voicebox, you complete the ritual, perfectly.
  
  There's no shimmering portal, no green flames spouting from your eyeballs, and no dramatic music. There's just a sound like a fart, and a Greater Demon appears.
  
  This demon looks pretty typical: tall, muscular, pure red skin, scheming snake eyes, a spade of a tail, and goat's legs, complete with hooves. The only unusual thing about him is that he has moose antlers instead of ram horns, and as such, barely fits within the summoning chamber. He's also standing with both hands clenched around something invisible, right in front of his rather large member, which is fully erect.
  
  He takes a second to orient himself, sees you, and groans, "What the fuck man? I was just, heh, disciplining this insubordinate little demon, making an example of him for all my other pawns, when you had to summon me!"
  
  You stand like a statue, completely speechless.
  
  The demon takes that as a cue to continue, "So, just between you and me, that gross, pale, fleshy little cunt had kind of a juicy bubble butt. I was going to town on him, and it felt good. So, you better realize that you took a lot of fun away from me. Actually, it's even worse, because I bet that bitch Zerxella is going to try and recruit all my forces! She fucking lucked out, being spawned from the pools of sludge with titties; my guys are going to immediately turn at the sight of nipple," the demon growls, as if staring into his rival's face. "They're nice titties though, I'll give her that. Anyways, you better choose your words carefully, because I am not in a good mood."
  
  > say "Kill the Intruders!"
  Claws slide out with a shink, and across your neck they go, before you can react in any manner.
  
  The demon laughs, "Oh man, you really weren't ready, were you."
  
  You can't do more than gurgle in response.
  
  He continues, "You are one of the intruders. An intruder into my affairs, an intruder into my life. Now I shall go and see what I can make of this plane. Ciao!"
  
  You collapse, more blood spilling from the site of your voicebox. The demon leaves you to bleed out.