text: [Themes: Horror, Espionage]
  
  > Go downwards
  You'll have to get off the roof first.
  
  Sheets of hail lash down from the heavens, driven by a roaring westerly.
  
  > leave
  You'll have to say which compass direction to go in.
  
  Sheets of hail lash down from the heavens, driven by a roaring westerly.
  
  > stand
  You get off the roof.
  
  Most of the space in the east end of the farms high stone barn is taken up by a huge haystack of rectangular bales, each of which is held together with tough, plastic twine. Around the double doors rusty farm equipment, almost inevitably infected with a potent range of bacteria, microbes, protozoa and agriculture ministers, lies derelict and unused.
  
  Towering black cumulonimbus clouds pour forth vast quantities of tiny, hard hailstones onto Skebdale.
  
  A red and white tractor is parked next to the haystack.
  
  Sheets of hail lash down from the heavens, driven by a roaring westerly.
  
  > get off
  This wide rectangle of concrete is littered with the chaotic fallout of everyday dairy farming. And its brown! The stark windows of the farmhouse stare accusingly down into the yard from the north, and, to the east, the roof of the main barn is outlined against the rising sun.
  
  Towering black cumulonimbus clouds pour forth vast quantities of tiny, hard hailstones onto Skebdale.
  
  The farm gate to the south-west is safely shut.
  
  A group of clucking chickens peck their way around the farmyard, desperately searching for grain.
  
  Sheets of hail lash down from the heavens, driven by a roaring westerly.
  
  > go north
  You can't go that way.
  
  Sheets of hail lash down from the heavens, driven by a roaring westerly.
  
  > go northeast
  You can't go that way.
  
  The storm continues to batter unrelenting upon Skebdale.
  
  > go to the north
  The farm's hallway serves its purpose well. In other words, its the way in. It leads up to a dark staircase, the northern end flanked by two low, wooden doorframes. Along the west wall, there is a row of three or four wooden pegs, underneath which is a delapidated welly rack.
  
  A bright yellow floppy sou'wester hangs from one of the pegs, clashing badly with the corridor's decor.
  
  The storm continues at full force outside.
  
  > take the hat
  You take the sou'wester, revealing an electric socket underneath.
  
  The storm continues at full force outside.
  
  > wear the hat
  You put on the sou'wester.
  
  The storm continues at full force outside.
  
  > examine rack
  A welly rack, made out of tough plastic-coated wire, screwed firmly into the wall about a foot from the floor.
  
  The storm continues at full force outside.
  
  > Go upwards
  You don't want to disturb the inhabitants privacy too much, and besides, your scared of the dark.
  
  The storm continues at full force outside.
  
  > go east
  Painted in an uninspiring shade of pastel cream-gunk, the farmhouse kitchen has evolved over time into a mixture of modern and ancient appliances jumbled against the walls. Decorated with stains ranging from champagne to tomato ketchup, the ceiling has obviously seen country life in all its glory.
  
  A single rubber glove lies discarded upon the draining board.
  
  You can also see a kettle here.
  
  The storm continues at full force outside.
  
  > take the glove
  Taken.
  
  The storm continues at full force outside.
  
  > examine the kettle
  A blue plastic electric kettle, which contains a little cold water. I shouldn't waste it: after all, there is a water shortage in Skebdale at the moment. Its black power wire leads to a white three-pin plug. The kettle is currently switched off.
  
  The storm continues at full force outside.
  
  > examine the glove
  You see nothing special about the rubber glove.
  
  The storm continues at full force outside.
  
  > Wear glove
  You try and pull the glove on, but it is too small for either of your well-built hands.
  
  The storm continues at full force outside.
  
  > look at the ceiling
  You see nothing special about the ceiling.
  
  The storm continues at full force outside.
  
  > go to the west
  The farm's hallway serves its purpose well. In other words, its the way in. It leads up to a dark staircase, the northern end flanked by two low, wooden doorframes. Along the west wall, there is a row of three or four wooden pegs, underneath which is a delapidated welly rack.
  
  Built into the west wall under the pegs is an electric socket.
  
  The storm continues at full force outside.
  
  > Go west
  The farmhouse's lounge closely resembles a bomb site. An old sofa, covered in ragged blankets and thin cushions, is positioned opposite a large TV and a wide, open fireplace. The window, hung with clashing flowery curtains, faces out onto the farmyard. A door in the east wall leads out to the hall.
  
  Laid out in front of the fireplace is a thick hearth-rug, covered in dog hair.
  
  Curled up on the rug there is, of course, a dog.
  
  The unusually violent storm suddenly dies and Skebdale is silent and peaceful once more.
  
  > look at the dog
  A sleek, speckled, black and white border collie. The archetypal sheepdog, it is laid out flat after a hard night spent sleeping.
  
  > wake dog
  The collie, moving like lightning, tries to bite your hand off, but you withdraw just in time.
  
  > examine the hair
  The rug is even thicker than an agriculture minister.
  
  > take the rug
  It's a bit to bulky to carry around with you.
  
  > move the rug
  The mat seems to be fixed down at one end.
  
  > go east
  The farm's hallway serves its purpose well. In other words, its the way in. It leads up to a dark staircase, the northern end flanked by two low, wooden doorframes. Along the west wall, there is a row of three or four wooden pegs, underneath which is a delapidated welly rack.
  
  Built into the west wall under the pegs is an electric socket.
  
  > Go south
  This wide rectangle of concrete is littered with the chaotic fallout of everyday dairy farming. And its brown! The stark windows of the farmhouse stare accusingly down into the yard from the north, and, to the east, the roof of the main barn is outlined against the rising sun.
  
  The farm gate to the south-west is safely shut.
  
  A group of clucking chickens peck their way around the farmyard, desperately searching for grain.
  
  > climb the gate
  You hop over the closed gate...
  
  A winding country road threads its way between old stone cottages and barns. Daffodils and snowdrops spring from the grass verges, adding a dash of colour to the grey walls and roofs. To your north, the sign of 'The Green Calf' swings in the sunshine, beckoning locals and tourists alike to pop in for a drink. There is a small garden to the south of the road which is attached, unsurprisingly, to a small house.
  
  A short gravel track leads up to a wooden gate to your north-east.
  
  Your car, a battered blue Volvo estate, is slewed across the grass verge, two wheels in the ditch.
  
  > Go south
  A beautiful Yorkshire garden, full of mouth-watering fruits such as parsnips, marrows and broccoli. This is more a vegetable garden than anything else, but the border beds have been liberally scattered with a variety of hardy perennials. To the east you can see a small unthreatening farmer's cottage.
  
  A garden fork has been rammed disrespectfully into a steaming compost heap in one corner of the garden.
  
  > search the bed
  In amongst the bushes you find a garish pink toy pistol. You can well imagine that it would come in useful here - there is a direct shot straight across the street.
  
  The owner of the house looks out at you, suspiciously.
  
  > take the fork
  You're carrying too many things already.
  
  The farmer taps firmly on the window and shouts something unintelligible.
  
  > Inventory
  You are carrying:
  a rubber glove
  a sou'wester (being worn)
  a leaflet
  a burnt-out battery
  a faxed note
  a remote control (which is open but empty)
  
  There is a creak as the window eases open and a rifle barrel sneaks through the crack.
  
  > put the battery in the remote
  You put the burnt-out battery into the remote control.
  
  The farmer shouts "Get out of my garden or tha'll get what thee deserve!"
  
  > take the fork
  Taken.
  
  "I'll count to four!" he shouts.
  
  > drop the note
  You feel guilty about having despoiled the countryside. Litter-bugs only have a few chances before they are caught red-handed.
  
  "One..."
  
  > take the pistol
  Taken.
  
  "Two..."
  
  > shoot the farmer with the pistol
  You pull the trigger but nothing comes out.
  
  "Three..."
  
  > Go north
  A winding country road threads its way between old stone cottages and barns. Daffodils and snowdrops spring from the grass verges, adding a dash of colour to the grey walls and roofs. To your north, the sign of 'The Green Calf' swings in the sunshine, beckoning locals and tourists alike to pop in for a drink. There is a small garden to the south of the road which is attached, unsurprisingly, to a small house.
  
  A short gravel track leads up to a wooden gate to your north-east.
  
  Your car, a battered blue Volvo estate, is slewed across the grass verge, two wheels in the ditch.
  
  > drop the pistol
  You feel guilty about having despoiled the countryside. Litter-bugs only have a few chances before they are caught red-handed.
  
  > go north
  This single-roomed inn is dominated by a long bar, topped with perfectly polished wood. The shelves behind the bar are stacked to breaking point with sparkling glasses and inviting bottles. A single beer pump protrudes forlornly from the bar at one end, but it is, unfortunately, un-manned, so you will have to cope without a drink. A well-oiled wooden door leads south-east into the street.
  
  Old Tom, Old Dick, and Old Harry sit around the beer pump, whispering conspiratorially.
  
  > go to the southeast
  A winding country road threads its way between old stone cottages and barns. Daffodils and snowdrops spring from the grass verges, adding a dash of colour to the grey walls and roofs. To your north, the sign of 'The Green Calf' swings in the sunshine, beckoning locals and tourists alike to pop in for a drink. There is a small garden to the south of the road which is attached, unsurprisingly, to a small house.
  
  A short gravel track leads up to a wooden gate to your north-east.
  
  Your car, a battered blue Volvo estate, is slewed across the grass verge, two wheels in the ditch.
  
  You can also see a toy pistol here.
  
  > Go south
  A beautiful Yorkshire garden, full of mouth-watering fruits such as parsnips, marrows and broccoli. This is more a vegetable garden than anything else, but the border beds have been liberally scattered with a variety of hardy perennials. To the east you can see a small unthreatening farmer's cottage.
  
  You can also see a faxed note here.
  
  "Three..."
  
  > drop all
  garden fork: Dropped.
  rubber glove: Dropped.
  leaflet: You feel guilty about having despoiled the countryside. Litter-bugs only have a few chances before they are caught red-handed. faxed note: You feel guilty about having despoiled the countryside. Litter-bugs only have a few chances before they are caught red-handed. remote control: Dropped.
  
  > go south
  A beautiful Yorkshire garden, full of mouth-watering fruits such as parsnips, marrows and broccoli. This is more a vegetable garden than anything else, but the border beds have been liberally scattered with a variety of hardy perennials. To the east you can see a small unthreatening farmer's cottage.
  
  You can also see a toy pistol here.
  
  "I'll count to four!" he shouts.
  
  > take all
  rain clouds: It's hard to pick up an accumulation of water vapour half a mile above your head.
  angry farmer: I don't suppose the angry farmer would care for that. toy pistol: Taken.
  flower bed: That's hardly portable.
  
  "One..."
  
  > Go east
  You can't get inside the house.
  
  "Two..."
  
  > go north
  A winding country road threads its way between old stone cottages and barns. Daffodils and snowdrops spring from the grass verges, adding a dash of colour to the grey walls and roofs. To your north, the sign of 'The Green Calf' swings in the sunshine, beckoning locals and tourists alike to pop in for a drink. There is a small garden to the south of the road which is attached, unsurprisingly, to a small house.
  
  A short gravel track leads up to a wooden gate to your north-east.
  
  A crumpled leaflet, heartlessly discarded by yourself just moments ago, blows back and forth in the gentle summer breeze.
  
  Your car, a battered blue Volvo estate, is slewed across the grass verge, two wheels in the ditch.
  
  You can also see a remote control (in which is a burnt-out battery), a faxed note, a rubber glove and a garden fork here.
  
  > take all
  rain clouds: It's hard to pick up an accumulation of water vapour half a mile above your head.
  wooden gate: That's fixed in place.
  remote control: Taken.
  faxed note: Taken.
  leaflet: Taken.
  rubber glove: Taken.
  garden fork: You're carrying too many things already.
  sign: That's hardly portable.
  Volvo: It's a tad heavy to pick up.
  boot: That's hardly portable.
  
  > examine the fork
  The six-pronged garden fork seems to be quite expensive. The handle is made of some sort of exotic, dark wood, and just below the triangular hand-hold there is a small silver plaque, inscribed simply with a single ornamented letter D.
  
  > Inventory
  You are carrying:
  a rubber glove
  a leaflet
  a faxed note
  a remote control (which is open)
  a burnt-out battery
  a toy pistol
  a sou'wester (being worn)
  
  > drop the glove
  Dropped.
  
  > look at the pistol
  The pistol is an uninspiring shade of washed-out pink, but makes up for it with the battery-powered sound effects generator tagged on to the handle. Its pea-sized water tank is currently empty.
  
  > open the generator
  You open the sound-effects generator, revealing a watch battery.
  
  > take the battery
  Which do you mean, the burnt-out battery or the watch battery?
  
  > take the watch battery
  You're carrying too many things already.
  
  > check your inventory
  You are carrying:
  a garden fork
  a leaflet
  a faxed note
  a remote control (which is open)
  a burnt-out battery
  a toy pistol
  a sou'wester (being worn)
  
  > drop the fork and the leaflet
  garden fork: Dropped.
  leaflet: Dropped.
  
  > put the watch battery in the remote
  You put the watch battery into the remote control.
  
  > Close remote
  You close the remote control.
  
  > take the fork and the leaflet
  garden fork: Taken.
  leaflet: Taken.
  
  > show the fork to Dick
  Old Dick is unimpressed.
  
  > go to the southeast
  A winding country road threads its way between old stone cottages and barns. Daffodils and snowdrops spring from the grass verges, adding a dash of colour to the grey walls and roofs. To your north, the sign of 'The Green Calf' swings in the sunshine, beckoning locals and tourists alike to pop in for a drink. There is a small garden to the south of the road which is attached, unsurprisingly, to a small house.
  
  A short gravel track leads up to a wooden gate to your north-east.
  
  Your car, a battered blue Volvo estate, is slewed across the grass verge, two wheels in the ditch.
  
  You can also see a rubber glove here.
  
  > Unlock Volvo
  What do you want to unlock the Volvo with?
  
  > examine remote
  A beautifully styled black handset with an invitingly red button in the middle. A small panel on the back allows you to change the battery.
  
  > open the car
  You open the Volvo.
  
  > get in Volvo
  There's very little point getting in the car - you've got a job to do! But you might like to have a look in the boot...
  
  > open the boot
  You open the boot, revealing a briefcase, a white coat and a key ring.
  
  > open the briefcase
  It seems to be locked.
  
  > unlock the briefcase with the keys
  You unlock the briefcase.
  
  > Inventory
  You are carrying:
  a key ring
  a leaflet
  a garden fork
  a faxed note
  a remote control (which is closed)
  a sou'wester (being worn)
  
  > put the leaflet and note and the remote in the briefcase
  leaflet: Done.
  faxed note: Done.
  remote control: Done.
  
  > Wear coat
  You put on the white coat.
  
  > examine the coat
  The statutory mantle worn by psychiatrists and mad laboratory technicians. It has two conveniently large pockets.
  
  > look in the pockets
  The white coat is empty.
  
  > Typed note
  Operation: Red-Chevette
  Agent: 667
  
  You might find that this comes in useful, I've heard it's more potent than it looks.
  
  > examine the jar
  A small blank glass jar. It is full of a clear liquid.
  
  > open the jar
  You open the glass jar.
  
  > drink liquid
  You daren't risk drinking the unknown liquid. After all, it could be flat lemonade, and that would just be plain disgusting.
  
  > close jar
  You close the glass jar.
  
  > look in the trunk
  The boot is empty.
  
  > Inventory
  You are carrying:
  a white coat (being worn and empty)
  a briefcase (which is open)
  a remote control (which is closed)
  a faxed note
  a leaflet
  a glass jar
  a typed note
  a key ring
  a garden fork
  a sou'wester (being worn)
  
  > Go north
  This single-roomed inn is dominated by a long bar, topped with perfectly polished wood. The shelves behind the bar are stacked to breaking point with sparkling glasses and inviting bottles. A single beer pump protrudes forlornly from the bar at one end, but it is, unfortunately, un-manned, so you will have to cope without a drink. A well-oiled wooden door leads south-east into the street.
  
  Old Tom, Old Dick, and Old Harry sit around the beer pump, whispering conspiratorially.
  
  You can see a toy pistol and a burnt-out battery here.
  
  > pour the liquid in the pistol
  (first taking the glass jar)
  You fill the pistol from the jar.
  
  > ask Dick abouthe Red-Chevette
  Old Dick winks and smiles at you. "I think this young man deserves some reward for his effort," he says. "'E's obviously an 'ard working young'un. 'Ere, have a can of Sikston's on me." He hands you an aluminium can and then turns back to his pint.
  
  > examine the sikston'S
  The sealed can declares itself as:
  
  ?SIKSTONS' EXTREMELY PECULIAR?
  
  > open can
  You yank sharply on the ring-pull which comes off easily in your hand. After a brief sub-second the over-enthusiastic widget kicks into action and froth and foam spurts from the can as if it were a volcano. In shock you drop the can and its remaining contents spill onto the floor.
  
  > Open beer
  You yank sharply on the ring-pull which comes off easily in your hand. After a brief sub-second the over-enthusiastic widget kicks into action and froth and foam spurts from the can as if it were a volcano. In shock you drop the can and its remaining contents spill onto the floor.
  
  There is a sudden flash of lightning and a distant rumble of thunder, warning of impending gloom.
  
  > take the can
  (putting the garden fork into the briefcase to make room)
  Taken.
  
  There is a sudden flash of lightning and a distant rumble of thunder, warning of impending gloom.
  
  > shake the beer
  You apply a shake equivalent to 6.4 on the Richter scale, but nothing happens.
  
  > look at what you're carrying with you
  You are carrying:
  a can of beer
  a glass jar
  a toy pistol
  a white coat (being worn and empty)
  a briefcase (which is open)
  a remote control (which is closed)
  a faxed note
  a leaflet
  a typed note
  a key ring
  a garden fork
  a sou'wester (being worn)
  
  > put the beer in pocket
  You put the can of beer into the white coat.
  
  There is a sudden flash of lightning and a distant rumble of thunder, warning of impending gloom.
  
  > put keys in the pocket
  You put the key ring into the white coat.
  
  > go south
  A beautiful Yorkshire garden, full of mouth-watering fruits such as parsnips, marrows and broccoli. This is more a vegetable garden than anything else, but the border beds have been liberally scattered with a variety of hardy perennials. To the east you can see a small unthreatening farmer's cottage.
  
  "Two..."
  
  > shoot the farmer with the pistol
  The liquid squirts feebly towards the farmer who just gets even more angry.
  
  "Three..."
  
  > give the beer to farmer
  (first taking the can of beer)
  The farmer shouts several expletives and then shuts up.
  
  "Three..."
  
  > throw beer at the farmer
  (first taking the can of beer)
  (putting the garden fork into the briefcase to make room)
  The farmer shouts several expletives and then shuts up.
  
  "Three..."
  
  > ask the farmer abouthe Red-Chevette
  The farmer shouts several expletives and then shuts up.
  
  "Three..."
  
  > climb the gate
  You hop over the closed gate...
  
  This wide rectangle of concrete is littered with the chaotic fallout of everyday dairy farming. And its brown! The stark windows of the farmhouse stare accusingly down into the yard from the north, and, to the east, the roof of the main barn is outlined against the rising sun.
  
  The farm gate to the south-west is safely shut.
  
  A group of clucking chickens peck their way around the farmyard, desperately searching for grain.
  
  > go north
  The farm's hallway serves its purpose well. In other words, its the way in. It leads up to a dark staircase, the northern end flanked by two low, wooden doorframes. Along the west wall, there is a row of three or four wooden pegs, underneath which is a delapidated welly rack.
  
  Built into the west wall under the pegs is an electric socket.
  
  > go west
  The farmhouse's lounge closely resembles a bomb site. An old sofa, covered in ragged blankets and thin cushions, is positioned opposite a large TV and a wide, open fireplace. The window, hung with clashing flowery curtains, faces out onto the farmyard. A door in the east wall leads out to the hall.
  
  Laid out in front of the fireplace is a thick hearth-rug, covered in dog hair.
  
  Curled up on the rug there is, of course, a dog.
  
  > shoot the dog with the pistol
  The liquid squirts feebly out of the pistol and into the ground.
  
  The wind picks up and the sky darkens as black rain-clouds appear on the western horizon.
  
  > open the jar
  You open the glass jar.
  
  The wind picks up and the sky darkens as black rain-clouds appear on the western horizon.
  
  > open the remote
  You open the remote control, revealing a watch battery.
  
  > take the watch battery
  (putting the garden fork into the briefcase to make room)
  Taken.
  
  > put the battery in the generator
  You put the watch battery into the sound-effects generator.
  
  > Close generator
  You close the sound-effects generator.
  
  > shoot the dog with the pistol
  The liquid squirts feebly out of the pistol and into the ground.
  
  > Examine generator
  The generator consists of a panel on the gun's handle. It has a small battery compartment and three buttons - blue, green, and yellow.
  
  > Button
  Woof! Woof! Woof!
  
  The collie gets very excited and jumps up from the mat, leaping in a canine frenzy at the gun.
  
  > move the rug
  The mat seems to be fixed down at one end.
  
  Black cumulonimbus clouds tower over Skebdale to the north-west.
  
  > roll the rug
  You roll up the hearth-rug, revealing beneath a small wooden trapdoor.
  
  > take the fork
  Taken.
  
  The border collie pads off towards the farm hallway.
  
  > open trap with the fork
  The prongs of the fork fit perfectly into the holes and you easily manage to lever the trapdoor open.