text: [Themes: Fantasy, cyborg, parody, science fantasy, retro, Comedy, science fiction, fantasy, male protagonist, humour]
  
  > look around
  Your nostrils flare at the lingering smoke from incense, and at the strong scent of holy oils. The TEMPLE is ancient, cold and dark, with but dim shafts of smoky light from high windows. In the center of the room is an ALTAR, on which a SACRIFICE is being prepared.
  
  You can see the VIRAXIAN INCENSE, the ACOLYTE OF TRAGA and GINA THE VIRGIN SACRIFICE here.
  
  > regard ALTAR
  The ALTAR has an oiled, naked VIRGIN SACRIFICE on it. She gives you a wink.
  
  > Smell
  The bloodlust must be clouding your thoughts, barbarian. The HELP command may offer some remedy.
  
  > regard the meat
  The SLAB OF SNOW-SERPENT MEAT shines in its raw ichor. Your tribe has long known that the flesh of this beast, once properly ripened and then consumed rapidly, has magic healing properties that allow Warriors to defeat foes much more powerful than they. Useful, for a Warrior-born such as you! This slab has now ripened; the ichor swirls with prismatic power and the stench is comforting.
  
  > Go outside
  The snow on this mountain slope is all but undisturbed, and it glows a rich orange in the light of the setting sun. You can see that sun, far to the west, sinking into the sea. Its rays touch also on an ornate structure: You may (if you dare) ENTER a black TEMPLE to the Viraxian Demon-Gods.
  
  > Go west
  The pine trees have the first dustings of winter, here, and you espy much more snow to the east, in the FROSTED UPLANDS. The runoff feeds a briskly-flowing stream, which flows west toward the CASTLE. Marshier country lay to the south.
  
  A bit upstream from you, a GRIZZLY BEAR is fishing for food, but not having much luck. The BEAR doesn't seem hostile.
  
  Danger! Your keen ears pick up the barking and howling of the PYREXIS HOUND PACK, nearby!
  
  > Go south
  You stand in a dismal swamp, with the chitter of unpleasant life in every direction. Footing is torturous here, slowed by the grey murk sucking at your sandaled tread.
  
  There is a large, MOSSY STONE IDOL here. Even half-sunken in the mire, it stands a head taller than you, with crude, angry features.
  
  You can also see a PYREXIS HOUND PACK here.
  
  The entire PACK leaps upon you! You feel tooth and claw shredding at your very force of life! You have suffered 4 hits of damage!
  
  > Attack pack
  Damn and blast! A miss!
  
  The PACK take turns tearing at your flesh! You have suffered 2
  hits of damage!
  
  > Assail pack
  Taste barbarian rage, PYREXIS HOUND PACK! You scored 11 points of damage!
  
  The PACK LEADER leaps forward, and cuts deep into your shoulder with his FIERY FANGS OF HEAT! You have suffered 13 hits of damage!
  
  > Assail pack
  You lunge deep, and strike! You scored 6 points of damage!
  
  As the PACK LEADER brays from the rear, the other HOUNDS shred flesh from your legs! You have suffered 4 hits of damage!
  
  > Assail pack
  By Huron's discordant drum solo! Thou hast missest!
  
  The PACK take turns tearing at your flesh! You have suffered 5
  hits of damage!
  
  > Assail pack
  A thousand curses on these foolish percentile dice! A miss!
  
  As the PACK LEADER brays from the rear, the other HOUNDS shred flesh from your legs! You have suffered 13 hits of damage!
  
  > Assail pack
  Curses! A miss!
  
  The PACK LEADER leaps forward, and cuts deep into your shoulder with his FIERY FANGS OF HEAT! You have suffered 3 hits of damage!
  
  > Assail pack
  By Huron's hallowed hiphuggers, a fine hit! You scored 10 points
  of damage!
  
  The entire PACK leaps upon you! You feel tooth and claw shredding at your very force of life! You have suffered 6 hits of damage!
  
  > Assail PACK
  You lash out with the rage of your barbarian ancestors! You scored
  13 points of damage, leaving the PYREXIS HOUND PACK at your
  mercy!
  
  The PYREXIS HOUND PACK is defeated!
  
  With the last of the PYREXIS HOUNDS dead at your feet, you grab the strongest by the jaw and rip its head from its body. Examining the beast, you recall a lesson taught you by a Pioneer when you were a youngling: pluck out the eye of a PYREXIS HOUND, and you need never touch flint to steel again. You dig your finger into the socket, remove the prize, then cast the head aside.
  
  You stand in a dismal swamp, with the chitter of unpleasant life in every direction. Footing is torturous here, slowed by the grey murk sucking at your sandaled tread.
  
  There is a large, MOSSY STONE IDOL here. Even half-sunken in the mire, it stands a head taller than you, with crude, angry features.
  
  > check what you're carrying
  You bear the following (both on your person and stashed in your trusty THESKIAN DUFFEL BAG): a PYREXIAN EYE, a DELICATELY-OILED CLOTH, a SLAB OF SNOW-SERPENT MEAT, a TWO-HANDED SWORD (held at the ready), an EAR OF CORN, a SUIT OF CHAINMAIL ARMOR (being worn), some STINKY BAIT, a SUIT OF BURLAP ARMOR (currently un-used), a FLASHLIGHT and a GLADIUS SWORD (currently un-used).
  
  > Regard pyrexian eye
  The PYREXIAN EYE, ripped from the skull of the strongest of the SLAVER KING'S beloved pets, is very warm to the touch, and but the slightest squeeze makes it flash briefly with flame. 'Tis nothing sustained enough to provide much light or heat for survival, but the spark is well-suited to lighting tinder for a campfire.
  
  > Go south
  The forest here is mucky and warm, surrounding a sinkhole filled with iridescent, gently glowing water. Some huge PIPES lead from here into the ground, and they drip with a similar strange water. There is a foul electric odor here, and your vision swims. You can feel your body being overtaken by weakness!
  
  You are weakening so quickly ... Your barbarian instinct is to get far from here ...
  
  > go south
  A high WATERFALL cascades down from a mountain ridge above, foaming and roaring into a broad POOL of clean water. The result is a brilliant PRISMATIC SPRAY. The setting is very peaceful.
  
  Swimming in the crystalline POOL is a MAGIC FISH, playing around in the churning waters at the base of the WATERFALL.
  
  > go to the west
  This is the edge of a great cliff, looking over a vast CHASM to the south. The mists are so heavy within that you can barely detect a raging river far, far below.
  
  A tiny TREE clings tenaciously to the edge of the cliff.
  
  > go to the west
  Cracked remnants of walls and a stretch of weed-grown cobblestones tell of an old temple or abbey ... perhaps even a village. Whatever it was, it now lies in ROCKY RUIN. Poking through the remnants, you notice a shadowy archway leading IN to one small structure that remains intact.
  
  Simply walking IN, however, isn't currently an option, as a vast RUIN SLUG - the largest you've ever seen - is basking its slimy bulk in the evening sun, right near the entrance. The SLUG makes no move toward you, but you'd have to ASSAIL it (and survive) to find out what lay beyond the arch.
  
  You can also see a TELEPHONE POLE here.
  
  > Go north
  Forest surrounds this hill on all sides, but there are no trees at the top - only grass and a few sad flowers, bending toward the setting sun. You see farmland to the north, and the CASTLE of the SLAVER KING looming high above. To the west is the harbor TOWN, but there's no good path from here.
  
  > use the cloth on ROBODROID
  Touching the cloth gently to the rusty "wounds" on the ROBODROID'S silver skin, the fine ANOINTING OIL allows some of the tiny parts to move a bit more freely for a moment. Some of the lights on his flat display-face begin to flutter more brightly, and the ROBODROID whispers in a thin, crackling voice:
  
  "Thank. You. Friend. Need. Repair. Cabling. Need. Repair. Power! Find. Cabling. Where. Robodroids. Are. There. Cabling. Power! Help. Please. Please. Please. Please ..."
  
  ... and then the ROBODROID falls silent once more.
  
  > go north
  A gentle breeze ripples the sparse grasses here, under a blood-red sun. There are many paths. You see mountains to the distant east. You feel a manly twitching in your thews, enlivened by the freedom of the open country.
  
  > go to the east
  You stand in a dismal swamp, with the chitter of unpleasant life in every direction. Footing is torturous here, slowed by the grey murk sucking at your sandaled tread.
  
  There is a large, MOSSY STONE IDOL here. Even half-sunken in the mire, it stands a head taller than you, with crude, angry features.
  
  > go east
  The great snow-capped PEAKS now loom above you, dramatic and craggy through the treetops. You can see a WINDING TRAIL leading south that would take you higher into the mountains.
  
  You can see an INFERNAL APE here.
  
  The INFERNAL APE moves with blinding speed, and its fangs sink
  deep! You have suffered 4 hits of damage!
  
  > Attack ape
  You hit hard, snarling with rage! You scored 8 points of
  damage!
  
  The INFERNAL APE strikes, leaping high and ripping into your chest with a savage snarl. You have suffered 7 hits of damage!
  
  > Attack ape
  You leap, and strike! You scored 13 points of damage!
  
  The INFERNAL APE attacks in a scorching blur of HELL-FIRE, burning your flesh with an infernal howl of triumph! You have suffered 5
  hits of damage!
  
  > Attack ape
  You lunge deep, and strike! You scored 6 points of damage!
  
  The INFERNAL APE attacks you savagely, but misses!
  
  > Attack ape
  By Huron's munificent milkmaids, a blow to be remembered! You
  scored 13 points of damage!
  
  The INFERNAL APE moves with blinding speed, and its fangs sink
  deep! You have suffered 11 hits of damage!
  
  > Attack ape
  By Huron's unsurvivable singing voice! A miss!
  
  With a snarl, the INFERNAL APE is airborne, slashing deeply into your side with his fangs. You have suffered 5 hits of damage!
  
  > Attack ape
  Sa-ho! You give the INFERNAL APE a sampling of your TWO-HANDED SWORD, but good! You scored 8 points of damage!
  
  The INFERNAL APE leaps straight for your throat, and his fangs rip deep into your neck and shoulder. You have suffered 11 hits of
  damage!
  
  > Attack ape
  You attack with all your might! You scored 10 points of
  damage!
  
  The INFERNAL APE attacks in a scorching blur of HELL-FIRE, burning your flesh with an infernal howl of triumph! You have suffered 2
  hits of damage!
  
  > Attack ape
  Sa-ho! A mighty attack! You scored 7 points of damage!
  
  With a snarl, the INFERNAL APE is airborne, slashing deeply into your side with his fangs. You have suffered 9 hits of damage!
  
  > Attack ape
  You could have sworn your aim was true, but your quarry was already elsewhere! A miss!
  
  The INFERNAL APE leaps straight for your throat, and his fangs rip deep into your neck and shoulder. You have suffered 6 hits of
  damage!
  
  > go east
  The great snow-capped PEAKS now loom above you, dramatic and craggy through the treetops. You can see a WINDING TRAIL leading south that would take you higher into the mountains.
  
  You can see an INFERNAL APE here.
  
  The INFERNAL APE leaps straight for your throat, and his fangs rip deep into your neck and shoulder. You have suffered 6 hits of
  damage!
  
  > Assail ape
  You could have sworn your aim was true, but your quarry was already elsewhere! A miss!
  
  The INFERNAL APE moves with blinding speed, and its fangs sink
  deep! You have suffered 6 hits of damage!
  
  > Assail ape
  Sa-ho! You give the INFERNAL APE a sampling of your TWO-HANDED SWORD, but good! You scored 9 points of damage!
  
  The INFERNAL APE attacks you savagely, but misses!
  
  > Assail ape
  You attack with all your might! You scored 9 points of
  damage!
  
  The INFERNAL APE leaps straight for your throat, and his fangs rip deep into your neck and shoulder. You have suffered 4 hits of
  damage!
  
  > Assail ape
  Sa-ho! A mighty attack! You scored 12 points of damage!
  
  With a snarl, the INFERNAL APE is airborne, slashing deeply into your side with his fangs. You have suffered 7 hits of damage!
  
  > Assail ape
  By Huron's extravagant allowance! A mighty blow! You scored 6
  points of damage!
  
  The INFERNAL APE attacks in a scorching blur of HELL-FIRE, burning your flesh with an infernal howl of triumph! You have suffered 10
  hits of damage!
  
  > Assail ape
  By Huron's unwarranted waistcoat, your TWO-HANDED SWORD lands
  home! You scored 6 points of damage!
  
  The INFERNAL APE strikes, leaping high and ripping into your chest with a savage snarl. You have suffered 3 hits of damage!
  
  > Assail ape
  Your foe is astonished by your speed as you strike hard! You
  scored 5 points of damage!
  
  The INFERNAL APE moves with blinding speed, and its fangs sink
  deep! You have suffered 3 hits of damage!
  
  > Assail ape
  By Huron's unrepenting usurpers, a fine hit! You scored 11 points
  of damage!
  
  The INFERNAL APE attacks you savagely, but misses!
  
  > Assail ape
  You attack! You scored 6 points of damage!
  
  With a snarl, the INFERNAL APE is airborne, slashing deeply into your side with his fangs. You have suffered 5 hits of damage!
  
  > Assail ape
  By Huron's seven sonic saprophytes, you strike hard and true! You scored 14 points of damage, leaving the INFERNAL APE at your
  mercy!
  
  The INFERNAL APE is defeated!
  
  The powerful hell-spawned APE slides to the forest floor, his dead eyes staring past you into the spirit world. There is a harsh puff of brimstone, and the ground splits beneath him, swallowing his remains in a rush of foul, superheated air. Then, all is peaceful once more in the WOODED FOOTHILLS.
  
  The great snow-capped PEAKS now loom above you, dramatic and craggy through the treetops. You can see a WINDING TRAIL leading south that would take you higher into the mountains.
  
  You feel the wind change direction.
  
  > go south
  This pathway is steep, and you're currently at a point where great rocks blocks your view of the SLAVER KING'S realm. The rise is too steep to the east, but you can continue the trail to the south if you want to climb all the way to the PEAK OF MOUNT GELIDUS.
  
  > Go south
  The view from the summit of MOUNT GELIDUS is enough to move even you, to give you a moment's peace from your savage thirst for vengeance. But only a moment. As you look down through the mists to the farms and forests stretching out to the SEA, the sight of the CASTLE of the SLAVER KING, framed in the distant sunset, reminds you of your purpose.
  
  An enormous CLIFF GIANT is sitting here, ninety tons of drowsy, rocky mass. Even his beard is made of stone. He's half-looking at the scenic vista, half-sleeping. When he snores, it sends minor slides of pebbles and loose snow bouncing down the mountainside. He rests in front of the entrance to a CAVE.
  
  > examine CLIFF GIANT
  The CLIFF GIANT is really big, really rocky, and really drowsy. He seems barely aware of your presence.
  
  > Go inside
  The CLIFF GIANT is sitting in the way, his vast and rocky BACKSIDE entirely blocking the entrance.
  
  > Go north
  The great snow-capped PEAKS now loom above you, dramatic and craggy through the treetops. You can see a WINDING TRAIL leading south that would take you higher into the mountains.
  
  > go to the west
  A humble WELL provides a centerpiece for this quiet place, surrounded by farmland providing food for the port town to the west. To the north, the shadow of the SLAVER KING'S CASTLE blots out part of the evening sky, but there's no path there from here.
  
  > go south
  Forest surrounds this hill on all sides, but there are no trees at the top - only grass and a few sad flowers, bending toward the setting sun. You see farmland to the north, and the CASTLE of the SLAVER KING looming high above. To the west is the harbor TOWN, but there's no good path from here.
  
  > Go west
  You tread carefully, here. This is the city of the SLAVER KING, and he may have spies anywhere! Fortunately, the crowd here at the docks is a varied, noisy mass of people and creatures from all corners of Vanth. The MARKETPLACE further north surrounds the CASTLE entrance. The DARK ALLEYWAY immediately south might offer shelter if the guards come running.
  
  A GROUP OF PIRATES stands around the gangplank of a mighty PIRATE SHIP, deciding who may or may not go IN.
  
  "Look at that lubber barbarian!" one pirate chuckles. "No pirate he; he hasn't even got a parrot!"
  
  > Go north
  This busy MARKETPLACE is the heart of the town, nestled against the mighty GATES of the CASTLE. You are careful to keep a low profile here, directly beneath the looming facade of the SLAVER KING'S own citadel.
  
  A lone GUARD stands watch before the GATES, staring ahead dutifully and ignoring the throng of the MARKETPLACE.
  
  A pretty barbarian lass brushes past you, her attentions fixed on a burly GUARD she's wooing.
  
  > Go east
  The PORTCULLIS is down, sealing the CASTLE from entry.
  
  > use PORTCULLIS
  "Hands off it, boy." says the GUARD. "That belongs to the SLAVER KING, and isn't for filthy savages the likes of you."
  
  > assail GUARD
  These castle GUARDS are very much for show, and you slaughter him where he stands, causing shrieks of terror in the MARKETPLACE and sending some citizens fleeing in panic. Others, more accustomed to the dangers of a busy harbor, continue about their business.
  
  Another GUARD emerges from the iron door of the GUARDHOUSE to take his place, and the dead GUARD is dragged inside. The new GUARD points quietly to a nearby SIGN.
  
  > Regard sign
  The SIGN says 'NO SOLICITORS.'
  
  In very tiny letters beneath that, it also says 'PLEASE REFRAIN FROM KILLING THE GUARDS AS THEY GROWEST NOT UPON THE TREES.'