text: [Themes: Surreal, combat, surreal]
  
  > Look around
  The tuna doesn't look hurt, it looks angry.
  
  [ Your Stamina: 2     Bluefin Tuna: 14 ]
  
  The tuna advances again, and you step back again, until you feel the back wall of the alley right behind you.
  
  > examine the wall
  The alley walls are bright red brick.
  
  [ Your Stamina: 3     Bluefin Tuna: 14 ]
  
  The tuna threatens to crush you under its bulky body.
  
  > jump
  Wheeee!
  
  [ Your Stamina: 4     Bluefin Tuna: 14 ]
  
  The tuna gloats triumphantly at your cowardly retreat.
  
  > kick the tuna
  The fish sees your boot coming a mile away and easily evades your kick.
  
  [ Your Stamina: 3     Bluefin Tuna: 14 ]
  
  > Punch tuna
  Whap! You hit the tuna like it is a punching bag.
  
  [ Your Stamina: 1     Bluefin Tuna: 12 ]
  
  > rest
  You rest for a moment to regain your strength...
  
  [ Your Stamina: 2     Bluefin Tuna: 12 ]
  
  > Punch tuna
  Whap! You hit the tuna like it is a punching bag.
  
  [ Your Stamina: 0     Bluefin Tuna: 10 ]
  
  > look at the alley
  The alley walls are bright red brick.
  
  [ Your Stamina: 1     Bluefin Tuna: 10 ]
  
  > look at the tuna
  The tuna doesn't seem to realize it is bound for Tsukiji, yet.
  
  [ Your Stamina: 2     Bluefin Tuna: 10 ]
  
  > Punch tuna
  Whap! You hit the tuna like it is a punching bag.
  
  [ Your Stamina: 0     Bluefin Tuna: 8 ]
  
  > rest
  You rest for a moment to regain your strength...
  
  [ Your Stamina: 1     Bluefin Tuna: 8 ]
  
  > rest
  You rest for a moment to regain your strength...
  
  [ Your Stamina: 2     Bluefin Tuna: 8 ]
  
  > Punch tuna
  Whap! You hit the tuna like it is a punching bag.
  
  [ Your Stamina: 0     Bluefin Tuna: 6 ]
  
  > rest
  You rest for a moment to regain your strength...
  
  [ Your Stamina: 1     Bluefin Tuna: 6 ]
  
  > rest
  You rest for a moment to regain your strength...
  
  [ Your Stamina: 2     Bluefin Tuna: 6 ]
  
  > Punch tuna
  Whap! You hit the tuna like it is a punching bag.
  
  [ Your Stamina: 0     Bluefin Tuna: 4 ]
  
  > rest
  You rest for a moment to regain your strength...
  
  [ Your Stamina: 1     Bluefin Tuna: 4 ]
  
  > rest
  You rest for a moment to regain your strength...
  
  [ Your Stamina: 2     Bluefin Tuna: 4 ]
  
  > look at tuna
  The bluefin looks like a bull that has seen red.
  
  [ Your Stamina: 3     Bluefin Tuna: 4 ]
  
  > Backhand tuna
  Your hand stings from the force of the slap.
  
  [ Your Stamina: 1     Bluefin Tuna: 2 ]
  
  > rest
  You rest for a moment to regain your strength...
  
  [ Your Stamina: 2     Bluefin Tuna: 2 ]
  
  > Backhand tuna
  WHAM!!! The tuna flies back, smashing against the alley wall. The force of its fall causes a brick to dislodge, revealing a dark opening. That tuna is sushi.
  
  You have Defeated the bluefin tuna in 93 turns and 24 attacks, for a score of 0 out of a possible 20 points.
  
  This victory was well earned. Hemingway said it best: "A man can be destroyed but not defeated". You have won, but you'll need considerably more finesse next time if you want to hold your head up high.
  
  You look for a moment at the fallen bluefin, before it floats away with the rest of the trash. Its defeat will not go unnoticed. You had better prepare yourself as best you can, because this isn't just a back alley fistfight anymore. This is war. Your eye lingers on the dislodged brick, and the opening it revealed.
  
  [ Your Stamina: 0 ]
  
  > examine the opening
  There is a small opening in the brick wall where a brick has been dislodged, large enough to reach into, but too dark to see inside.
  
  There are more fish coming, you can sense it.
  
  [ Your Stamina: 1 ]
  
  > take the brick
  Taken.
  
  [ Your Stamina: 2 ]
  
  > reach in opening
  You reach into the dark opening. It is a narrow fit. Feeling around, the first thing you find is a piece of paper, which you take and pull out into the light.
  
  Outside of the shelter of your small alley, there is a gathering storm. A news helicopter circles overhead.
  
  [ Your Stamina: 3 ]
  
  > read the paper
  The last date was quite some time ago. Apparently cleaning requirements have become lax under the new management, not surprisingly.
  
  > examine paper
  [ Your Stamina: 4 ]
  
  A single sheet of greasy paper, titled "Men's Bathroom", followed by grid of dates and times and handwritten initials. The page is difficult to straighten out as it curls up at the edges.
  
  You see a few pilot fish peek around the corner and peer down the alley, then disappear just as quickly. Scouts.
  
  [ Your Stamina: 5 ]
  
  > reach in the opening
  You reach into the opening again, and this time you find what feels like a wooden pole. You lay the pole down, and pull it out by its end, until it gets stuck at what you recognize as a mop head. It is detachable, though, so a moment later you have unscrewed the mop head and let it drop back in the opening, while you have the handle, which you prefer to think of as a staff.
  
  [ Your Stamina: 6 ]
  
  > hit the fish with the staff
  The swordfish parries your strike, but for a moment, at least, your staff is pressed up against its bill, exposing the left side of its body.
  
  [ Your Stamina: 6     Swordfish: 20 ]
  
  > Backhand fish
  The long sword of the swordfish is in your way, you'll have to concentrate on only one side of this murderous fish.
  
  [ Your Stamina: 7     Swordfish: 20 ]
  
  > hit the body with the brick
  Whack! The swordfish gets a little tenderized.
  
  [ Your Stamina: 5     Swordfish: 18 ]
  
  The swordfish pushes away your staff and swims back a couple paces.
  
  > hit the fish with the staff
  The swordfish parries your strike, but for a moment, at least, your staff is pressed up against its bill, exposing the left side of its body.
  
  [ Your Stamina: 4     Swordfish: 18 ]
  
  > kick the body
  You give the swordfish a good kick to the belly.
  
  [ Your Stamina: 2     Swordfish: 16 ]
  
  > Keep going
  You give the swordfish a good kick to the belly.
  
  [ Your Stamina: 0     Swordfish: 14 ]
  
  The swordfish pushes away your staff and swims back a couple paces.
  
  > rest
  You rest for a moment to regain your strength...
  
  [ Your Stamina: 1     Swordfish: 14 ]
  
  > rest
  You rest for a moment to regain your strength...
  
  [ Your Stamina: 2     Swordfish: 14 ]
  
  > rest
  You rest for a moment to regain your strength...
  
  [ Your Stamina: 3     Swordfish: 14 ]
  
  > rest
  You rest for a moment to regain your strength...
  
  [ Your Stamina: 4     Swordfish: 14 ]
  
  > hit the fish with the staff
  The swordfish parries your strike, but for a moment, at least, your staff is pressed up against its bill, exposing the left side of its body.
  
  [ Your Stamina: 3     Swordfish: 14 ]
  
  > kick the fish
  You give the swordfish a good kick to the belly.
  
  [ Your Stamina: 1     Swordfish: 12 ]
  
  > rest
  You rest for a moment to regain your strength...
  
  [ Your Stamina: 2     Swordfish: 12 ]
  
  The swordfish pushes away your staff and swims back a couple paces.
  
  > rest
  You rest for a moment to regain your strength...
  
  [ Your Stamina: 3     Swordfish: 12 ]
  
  > rest
  You rest for a moment to regain your strength...
  
  [ Your Stamina: 4     Swordfish: 12 ]
  
  > rest
  You rest for a moment to regain your strength...
  
  [ Your Stamina: 5     Swordfish: 12 ]
  
  > rest
  You rest for a moment to regain your strength...
  
  [ Your Stamina: 6     Swordfish: 12 ]
  
  > rest
  You rest for a moment to regain your strength...
  
  [ Your Stamina: 7     Swordfish: 12 ]
  
  > rest
  You rest for a moment to regain your strength...
  
  [ Your Stamina: 8     Swordfish: 12 ]
  
  > hit the fish with the staff
  The swordfish parries your strike, but for a moment, at least, your staff is pressed up against its bill, exposing the left side of its body.
  
  [ Your Stamina: 7     Swordfish: 12 ]
  
  > kick the fish
  You give the swordfish a good kick to the belly.
  
  [ Your Stamina: 5     Swordfish: 10 ]
  
  > kick fish
  You give the swordfish a good kick to the belly.
  
  [ Your Stamina: 3     Swordfish: 8 ]
  
  The swordfish pushes away your staff and strikes at you, drawing blood in a thin line across the bridge of your nose.
  
  > hit the fish with the staff
  The swordfish parries your strike, but for a moment, at least, your staff is pressed up against its bill, exposing the left side of its body.
  
  [ Your Stamina: 2     Swordfish: 8 ]
  
  > kick the fish
  You give the swordfish a good kick to the belly.
  
  [ Your Stamina: 0     Swordfish: 6 ]
  
  > rest
  You rest for a moment to regain your strength...
  
  [ Your Stamina: 1     Swordfish: 6 ]
  
  The swordfish pushes away your staff and strikes at the mop handle, hard, splintering it into a thousand tiny pieces, one of which lodges in your forearm. You are left holding a small baton, no more than 18 inches long. The swordfish grins in pleasure. You pull the splinter out of your arm.
  
  > rest
  You rest for a moment to regain your strength...
  
  [ Your Stamina: 2     Swordfish: 6 ]
  
  > rest
  You rest for a moment to regain your strength...
  
  [ Your Stamina: 3     Swordfish: 6 ]
  
  > rest
  You rest for a moment to regain your strength...
  
  [ Your Stamina: 4     Swordfish: 6 ]
  
  > rest
  You rest for a moment to regain your strength...
  
  [ Your Stamina: 5     Swordfish: 6 ]
  
  > rest
  You rest for a moment to regain your strength...
  
  [ Your Stamina: 6     Swordfish: 6 ]
  
  > Inventory
  You have a brick, a piece of paper, a broken mop handle, and a needle-like splinter.
  
  [ Your Stamina: 7     Swordfish: 6 ]
  
  > poke the swordfish with the splinter
  You can't get close enough to use it.
  
  [ Your Stamina: 8     Swordfish: 6 ]
  
  > hit the fish with the brick
  The swordfish knocks the brick out of your hands with a deft flick of its bill.
  
  [ Your Stamina: 7     Swordfish: 6 ]
  
  > take the brick
  Taken.
  
  [ Your Stamina: 8     Swordfish: 6 ]
  
  > hit the fish with the handle
  The swordfish easily evades the short handle and gives you a cut to the arm to remember it by.
  
  [ Your Stamina: 6     Swordfish: 6 ]
  
  > reach in the opening
  You reach into the opening again. You can feel a mop head, and the rim of a large bucket, but nothing else.
  
  [ Your Stamina: 9     Swordfish: 6 ]
  
  > reach in the bucket
  You reach into the bucket and feel around. You feel something soft and wet and smooth. You pull it out of the opening and take a look: it's a rubber glove. Which is not at all what it felt like, but you've never been very good at that sort of thing.
  
  [ Your Stamina: 10        Swordfish: 6 ]
  
  > examine the glove
  It looks like an ordinary rubber glove to me.
  
  [ Your Stamina: 10        Swordfish: 6 ]
  
  > wear it
  Okay, you're now wearing the rubber glove.
  
  [ Your Stamina: 10        Swordfish: 6 ]
  
  > reach in the bucket
  You reach into the bucket, but don't feel anything in particular.
  
  [ Your Stamina: 10        Swordfish: 6 ]
  
  > hit the sword
  The swordfish slashes at your arm, cutting your sleeve to ribbons.
  
  [ Your Stamina: 9     Swordfish: 6 ]
  
  > kick the sword
  The swordfish nods its head down and slashes at your leg, slicing into your pant leg.
  
  [ Your Stamina: 8     Swordfish: 6 ]
  
  > throw the brick at the fish
  The swordfish deflects the brick, sending it crashing into your temple. Blood trickles into your eyes.
  
  [ Your Stamina: 3     Swordfish: 6 ]
  
  > put the paper on the sword
  There's no good surface on the swordfish.
  
  [ Your Stamina: 9     Swordfish: 6 ]
  
  > take the sword
  The swordfish evades your grasp. You won't stop them by a simple catch and release program, anyway. It is time to settle this, once and for all.
  
  [ Your Stamina: 10        Swordfish: 6 ]
  
  > throw the splinter at the fish
  You hit the swordfish with the needle, but it doesn't penetrate, and falls harmlessly to the ground. You need some way to shoot the splinter much faster if you hope to make it a dangerous projectile.
  
  [ Your Stamina: 9     Swordfish: 6 ]
  
  > Inventory
  You have a piece of paper, a broken mop handle, a needle-like splinter, a brick, and a rubber glove (being worn).
  
  [ Your Stamina: 9     Swordfish: 6 ]
  
  > roll paper
  You roll the paper into a tight tube, almost like a pipe or something.
  
  [ Your Stamina: 10        Swordfish: 6 ]
  
  > put the splinter in the paper
  You carefully load the needle into the rolled up sheet of paper, making a deadly blowgun. (To use the blowgun, simply SHOOT [TARGET].)
  
  [ Your Stamina: 10        Swordfish: 6 ]
  
  > shoot the fish
  You put your makeshift blowgun up to your mouth and blow. The needle shoots out, but the swordfish easily deflects it.
  
  [ Your Stamina: 9     Swordfish: 6 ]
  
  > take the needle
  Taken.
  
  [ Your Stamina: 10        Swordfish: 6 ]
  
  > Break opening
  You'll have to tell me how to do that.
  
  [ Your Stamina: 10        Swordfish: 6 ]
  
  > remove the glove
  Okay, you're no longer wearing the rubber glove.
  
  [ Your Stamina: 10        Swordfish: 6 ]
  
  > put the glove on the handle
  There is no good surface on the broken mop handle.
  
  [ Your Stamina: 10        Swordfish: 6 ]
  
  > put the brick in the glove
  You can't put anything into the rubber glove.
  
  [ Your Stamina: 10        Swordfish: 6 ]
  
  > Inventory
  You have a tightly rolled sheet of paper, a broken mop handle, a brick, a rubber glove, and a needle-like splinter.
  
  [ Your Stamina: 10        Swordfish: 6 ]
  
  > put the handle in the paper
  You can't fit that in the tightly rolled sheet of paper.
  
  [ Your Stamina: 10        Swordfish: 6 ]
  
  > put the splinter in the paper
  You carefully load the needle into the rolled up sheet of paper, making a deadly blowgun. (To use the blowgun, simply SHOOT [TARGET].)
  
  [ Your Stamina: 10        Swordfish: 6 ]
  
  > examine the handle
  There is only about a foot and a half left of the mop handle.
  
  [ Your Stamina: 10        Swordfish: 6 ]
  
  > About you
  You are sick of fish and the way they look at you. You have had enough. Now, it is payback time.
  
  [ Your Stamina: 10        Swordfish: 6 ]
  
  > look at the fish
  The cocky swordfish chooses this moment to reveal that it is left-handed, but as it isn't holding a sword, but swinging at you with its bill, the revelation is less than impressive.
  
  [ Your Stamina: 10        Swordfish: 6 ]
  
  > reach in the bucket
  You reach into the bucket, but don't feel anything in particular.
  
  [ Your Stamina: 10        Swordfish: 6 ]
  
  > move the bucket
  You reach into the opening and fiddle around with the bucket, to no effect.
  
  [ Your Stamina: 10        Swordfish: 6 ]
  
  > read the paper
  The paper isn't really readable in its current configuration.
  
  [ Your Stamina: 10        Swordfish: 6 ]
  
  > open the paper
  I don't know how to open the blowgun.
  
  [ Your Stamina: 10        Swordfish: 6 ]
  
  > Unfold paper
  The paper isn't folded, it is rolled.
  
  [ Your Stamina: 10        Swordfish: 6 ]
  
  > Unroll paper
  You carefully take the splinter out of the tube, and unroll the paper and flatten it out as best you can.
  
  [ Your Stamina: 10        Swordfish: 6 ]
  
  > fold the paper
  You fold the paper into a neat square.
  
  [ Your Stamina: 10        Swordfish: 6 ]
  
  > examine paper
  A single sheet of greasy paper, neatly folded.
  
  [ Your Stamina: 10        Swordfish: 6 ]
  
  > throw it at the fish
  You are in no mood for a game of catch.
  
  [ Your Stamina: 10        Swordfish: 6 ]
  
  > fold the paper
  You have already folded the paper. Further folding would get dangerously close to origami.
  
  [ Your Stamina: 10        Swordfish: 6 ]
  
  > roll paper
  You'll have to unfold it, first.
  
  [ Your Stamina: 10        Swordfish: 6 ]
  
  > hit the fish with the brick
  The swordfish knocks the brick out of your hands with a deft flick of its bill.
  
  [ Your Stamina: 9     Swordfish: 6 ]
  
  > take the brick
  Taken.
  
  [ Your Stamina: 10        Swordfish: 6 ]
  
  > Inventory
  You have a piece of paper, a broken mop handle, a rubber glove, a needle-like splinter, and a brick.
  
  [ Your Stamina: 10        Swordfish: 6 ]
  
  > look at the alley
  The alley walls are bright red brick. There is a small opening in the brick wall where a brick has been dislodged, large enough to reach into, but too dark to see inside.
  
  [ Your Stamina: 10        Swordfish: 6 ]
  
  > climb the wall
  There are no good handholds on the wall.
  
  [ Your Stamina: 10        Swordfish: 6 ]
  
  > climb the fish
  Whoa. Settle down there, Aquaman.
  
  [ Your Stamina: 10        Swordfish: 6 ]
  
  > jump
  Wheeee!
  
  [ Your Stamina: 10        Swordfish: 6 ]
  
  > hit the fish with the glove
  You strike a glancing blow at the swordfish with the rubber glove. "Shall we say pistols at dawn?"
  
  The swordfish does not respond. Looks like you're going to have to take care of this the old fashioned way, with your fist, foot, and, whenever possible, open palm.
  
  [ Your Stamina: 10        Swordfish: 6 ]
  
  > stab the fish with the handle
  The swordfish easily evades the short handle and gives you a cut to the arm to remember it by.
  
  [ Your Stamina: 8     Swordfish: 6 ]
  
  > Climb opening
  I don't know how to climb the dark opening.
  
  [ Your Stamina: 9     Swordfish: 6 ]
  
  > Xyzzy
  You invoke the magic word of prayer your grandfather once taught you. But nothing happens. Some secrets are not passed down from generation to generation, but are simply lost.
  
  [ Your Stamina: 10        Swordfish: 6 ]
  
  > hit the fish with the paper
  It's not very effective to attack with the piece of paper.
  
  [ Your Stamina: 10        Swordfish: 6 ]
  
  > reach in the hole
  You reach into the opening again. You can feel a mop head, and the rim of a large bucket, but nothing else.
  
  [ Your Stamina: 10        Swordfish: 6 ]
  
  > search the mop head
  You find nothing of interest.
  
  [ Your Stamina: 10        Swordfish: 6 ]
  
  > get the mop head
  You can't get the mop head out of the small opening.
  
  [ Your Stamina: 10        Swordfish: 6 ]
  
  > kick the fish
  The swordfish nods its head down and slashes at your leg, slicing into your pant leg.
  
  [ Your Stamina: 9     Swordfish: 6 ]
  
  > hit the fish with the handle
  The swordfish easily evades the short handle and gives you a cut to the arm to remember it by.
  
  [ Your Stamina: 7     Swordfish: 6 ]
  
  > roll paper
  You roll the paper into a tight tube, almost like a pipe or something.
  
  [ Your Stamina: 8     Swordfish: 6 ]
  
  > put the splinter in the paper
  You carefully load the needle into the rolled up sheet of paper, making a deadly blowgun. (To use the blowgun, simply SHOOT [TARGET].)
  
  [ Your Stamina: 9     Swordfish: 6 ]
  
  > shoot the body
  You put your makeshift blowgun up to your mouth and blow. The needle shoots out, but the swordfish easily deflects it.
  
  [ Your Stamina: 8     Swordfish: 6 ]
  
  > take the needle
  Taken.
  
  [ Your Stamina: 9     Swordfish: 6 ]
  
  > go north
  No way you're running from no damn fish. It ends here, one way or another.
  
  [ Your Stamina: 10        Swordfish: 6 ]
  
  > look under the fish
  There's nothing under the swordfish.
  
  [ Your Stamina: 10        Swordfish: 6 ]
  
  > kick the wall
  I don't know how to kick the wall.
  
  [ Your Stamina: 10        Swordfish: 6 ]
  
  > kick the bucket
  Not today. Not if you can help it.
  
  [ Your Stamina: 10        Swordfish: 6 ]
  
  > Punch fish
  The swordfish slashes at your arm, cutting your sleeve to ribbons.
  
  [ Your Stamina: 8     Swordfish: 6 ]
  
  > stand on the sword
  I don't know how to stand on the swordfish.
  
  [ Your Stamina: 9     Swordfish: 6 ]
  
  > examine the handle
  There is only about a foot and a half left of the mop handle.
  
  [ Your Stamina: 10        Swordfish: 6 ]
  
  > pull the handle
  Pulling the broken mop handle doesn't have any effect.
  
  [ Your Stamina: 10        Swordfish: 6 ]
  
  > examine the brick
  A crumbling red brick.
  
  [ Your Stamina: 10        Swordfish: 6 ]
  
  > throw the brick at the fish
  The swordfish deflects the brick, sending it crashing into your temple. Blood trickles into your eyes.
  
  [ Your Stamina: 5     Swordfish: 6 ]
  
  > examine the brick
  A crumbling red brick.
  
  [ Your Stamina: 6     Swordfish: 6 ]
  
  > take the brick
  Taken.
  
  [ Your Stamina: 7     Swordfish: 6 ]
  
  > hit the fish with the brick
  The swordfish knocks the brick out of your hands with a deft flick of its bill.
  
  [ Your Stamina: 6     Swordfish: 6 ]
  
  > examine the brick
  A crumbling red brick.
  
  [ Your Stamina: 8     Swordfish: 6 ]
  
  > attach the brick to handle
  There's no obvious way to do that.
  
  [ Your Stamina: 9     Swordfish: 6 ]
  
  > stab the brick with the handle
  You take out your frustrations on the brick.
  
  [ Your Stamina: 10        Swordfish: 6 ]
  
  > look in the glove
  There's nothing in the rubber glove.
  
  [ Your Stamina: 9     Swordfish: 6 ]
  
  > poke fish with the handle
  The swordfish easily evades the short handle and gives you a cut to the arm to remember it by.
  
  [ Your Stamina: 7     Swordfish: 6 ]
  
  > Poke brick
  Poking the brick doesn't seem to have any effect.
  
  [ Your Stamina: 10        Swordfish: 6 ]
  
  > throw the handle at the fish
  You are in no mood for a game of catch.
  
  [ Your Stamina: 10        Swordfish: 6 ]
  
  > put the fish in the opening
  You can't put the swordfish anywhere.
  
  [ Your Stamina: 10        Swordfish: 6 ]
  
  > look at what you're carrying with you
  You have a blowgun, a broken mop handle, a rubber glove, and a brick. The blowgun seems to contain a needle-like splinter.
  
  [ Your Stamina: 10        Swordfish: 6 ]
  
  > backhand yourself
  I don't know how to backhand yourself.
  
  [ Your Stamina: 10        Swordfish: 6 ]
  
  > examine Swordfish
  The swordfish is putting up a few "Give Swordfish a Break" bumper stickers, but you aren't buying.
  
  [ Your Stamina: 10        Swordfish: 6 ]
  
  > examine the handle
  There is only about a foot and a half left of the mop handle.
  
  [ Your Stamina: 10        Swordfish: 6 ]
  
  > look
  The swordfish is starting to look a bit pale and tired.
  
  [ Your Stamina: 10        Swordfish: 6 ]
  
  > Inventory
  You have a blowgun, a broken mop handle, a rubber glove, and a brick. The blowgun seems to contain a needle-like splinter.
  
  [ Your Stamina: 10        Swordfish: 6 ]