text: [Themes: modern]
  
  You don't particularly care for Clem, let alone his fat bitch wife Bertha, but if you have to work, might as well be for family. You get in your truck and prepare yourself for a family reunion of sorts. On your way there, you just realized you'll have to put up with his retard son and his bratty daughter as well. Fuck! Well it's been awhile since you've seen them, so maybe his daughter isn't a brat anymore; of course his son is most likely still a retard.
  
  You eventually get to Clem's pig farm. Clem sees you and greets you with a bear crushing hug. He's dressed in overalls and boots. He REEKS of month old pig shit and entrails and is covered in them as well.
  
  "Well howdy there Cousin Mel! What brings you out to these parts?"
  "Holy fuck Clem!" you say pushing him off of you. "You ever hear of a fuckin' bath?"
  "Har har! Same ol' citified Mel! That trailer park got you spoiled, with that indoor plummin' I'll tell you what! You still with that pretty li'l girl?"
  "Who, Tina? Yeah."
  "Yeah, she is sweeeeeet! Too little for me though. I like that Y'know me I likes 'em big. More cushin' for the pushin'! Har Har Har!" Clem slaps you on the back at this point
  "Yeah, that's great Clem, hey look you got something for me to do? I need a fuckin' job."
  "That a fact son? Well you are family and kin folk should always stick together. I got plenty of chores for you to do on this here farm. Question is, are you ready to do some work? Cause this ain't like that BIG city you live in where you get dem dere lunch breaks."
  "Yeah, I got it."
  "Alright then, just so you know. So what do you want to do? You can go feed the hogs, or if yer got the stomach fer it, you can go slaughter the hogs.
  "Is there any job that doesn't involve pigs?"
  "Haw Haw Haw! You got an interestin' sense of humor there Mel! I always liked that about ya!" Clem laughs and slaps you on the back again.
  
  > Slaughter the hogs
  Well it's not people, but it sounds like the next best thing.
  
  "Okay bring on the swine cause I'm about to slice me a pig and slice him thick!"
  "Well hold on there killer! I'm glad to see your enthusiasm, but yer gonna have to take up the killin' manner with Junior."
  "What?"
  "Tarnation Mel! You DO remember Junior right? He's a little slow but a good boy an' a hard worker. He's not much for the conversation, but he sho' knows how to kill dem pigs, I'll tell ya what! Got a natural talent fer it but he gets a little over protective of his nitch."
  "So why do you want me to help at all then?"
  "Well that boy spends TOO much time in that there slaughter house. He ain't been home fer days! His momma's worried about him an' I have to admit I am too. I figure if you can give him a break from the pig killin' for awhile, maybe he'll actually come visit us on his own accord. Okay then, the pig I'll leave you to it."
  
  Wonderful Clem has left you to deal with a retard armed with butcher tools with a love for killing. You approach the small slaughter house. You can hear the sounds of squealing pigs either being killed or awaiting their impending doom. Flies buzz all around and the smell of death is enduring here. As soon as you step in, you feel cold and your boots feel the squishiness of guts on the floor blood is everywhere. Pigs run back and forth in their pens frantically trying to escape, except for one big fat one all by himself in the back that's sleeping peacefully. (Or maybe it's dead, you can't tell from here)
  A big deformed man looks up from his recent kill and directs his attention immediately on you.
  "WHO YOU?" he asks gripping his meat cleaver. This could only be Junior.
  "I'm your cousin Mel, easy there. Your dad sent me to help."
  
  "He knows that, but he says you're overworked, and you should have some help. He's worried about you."
  Junior looks at you for a minute and then speaks.
  
  > Kill
  "Well killin' is why I'm here Junior."
  Junior hands you a heavy sledge hammer.
  "Sonofabitch this is heavy."
  
  "Um, okay."
  "GET PIGGY FOR YOU!" Junior goes to a holding pen and drags a pig out to you, he holds it as it tries to get away.
  
  You slowly lift the hammer up and bring it down onto the pig's head. You don't quite kill it though, now it's squirming and twitching. Junior is upset.
  
  You smash it in the head again, and again and again. It finally stops moving. Junior grabs the hammer from you.
  
  "Well fuck, the hammer's fuckin' heavy as shit! I was havin' a hard time lifting the fucking thing, I couldn't get enough swing power behind it. I'm not as fuckin' big as you!"
  Junior can barely comprehend what you're trying to say, but some of it seems to have gotten through.
  
  > laugh it off
  You make it a policy not to fight with overly strong retards with large hammers in their hands. You laugh it off.
  
  "Ha ha, hey Junior how about I bring you the pigs and you kill them then?"
  
  You and Junior switch places and things seem to work out better. It goes pretty quickly as well. You and Junior are done in no time.
  
  "Well that's why Clem hired me."
  Junior wanders off; he apparently is heading towards the regular house. Looks like you got Junior to finally go home. You go find Clem; he's overjoyed and gives you a bear hug.
  "Fuckin' Christ, get the hell off me!"
  "Sorry Mel, it's just dammit, I never thought he'd ever leave that place! His momma will be so happy to see 'im! Here! Take this money! You earned it! Come back tomorrow! We always got more pigs!"
  "Yeah, I'll do that Clem." You say dismissively and get in your truck and drive off.
  
  You go and pick up beer, cigarettes and porno magazines before you go back to your trailer. Tina comes home and sees you engaging in all three, still smelling of pig slaughter.
  
  "Well I can only guess you made some cash today, since you never stole any money out of my purse to buy all that shit. So what does Clem have you doing at the pig farm? It smells awful whatever the fuck it is, you killing the fucking things?"
  "Nah, just an assistant."