text: "I accept your challenge, vampire." You say, standing up.
  
  "Very good," he says to you, "prepare to be defeated." He also stands and the two of you walk over to the dart board.
  
  "I don't see any darts." You say.
  
  "Dammit," says Dracula, "I vill have to get the darts from the bartender."
  
  "All right," you say. "I'll just drink my beer and wait for you."
  
  He nods once and departs your company, headed for the bar. You sip at the dark brew, taking the foam from the top. You roll the liquid around delicately in your mouth as though tasting a fine wine. It is good. You have never been disappointed in a New Castles.
  
  Moments later, Dracula returns with six darts and a tall long island iced tea. "I have the darts." He says to you, setting them down on the table beside you. "You're still here aren't you?"
  
  "Yeah. Behind the floating beer glass." You reply.
  
  "Ah, ah, ah." He laughs. "You go first."
  
  He stands back and kicks back at his drink, taking half of it down in three enormous gulps. He lowers the glass as you throw the first dart, which lands on the outer ring of the bull's-eye. The next you throw lands double 15, and the third dart hits the one. The one always fucks you over.
  
  As you walk to the board to get your darts, you realize that you aren't sure if Dracula plays by the "Bull's-eye is worth 100, outer ring is 50" rule, or the "Bull's-eye is worth 50, outer ring is 25" rule. Most people don't realize that the bull's-eye is supposed to be 50, not 100, and there have been huge factions of enthusiasts playing both versions of the game.
  
  You turn around to question the vampire about his preferred variation of the rule when you see him glassy eyed and staggering, letting go of a dart which flies right at you.
  
  You try to duck, but are not fast enough and the dart hits you right in the forehead. "Vhat the fuck?," you hear Dracula say. You fall to the ground, off balance more than anything, and pull the dart from your forehead.
  
  "You are one stupid shit eating prick, Dracula!!" You say, throwing the dart on the ground with as much force as you can muster. You rub at invisible blood that wells up on your forehead. "I seriously fucking hate you!"
  
  "Vhat?" He says, shrugging his shoulders and looking in your general direction. "Vhat did I do?"
  
  "Fuck you, you stupid drunken vampire!!" You say.
  
  "I smell blood. Are you bleeding?" He asks.
  
  "You just stuck a fucking dart in my forehead, Drac!! Of course I'm fucking bleeding! For crying out loud, man, if I hadn't moved when I did, you would have got me right in the fucking eye!!"
  
  You grab your beer and drink the rest of it.
  
  "Okay, okay." He says to you, "I am sorry. You can have another turn."
  
  You push down the urge to strangle him and reply with a voice that reaches your very limits of control. "I do not want to play darts with you anymore."
  
  He stares at where he thinks you are stupidly, not understanding your anger. "But Vhy not?"
  
  "You hit me with a fucking dart in the fucking head, asshole!! That's why!! You stupid vampyric son of a bitch!!"
  
  "But I am sorry!" He replies.
  
  "You owe me a fucking beer, dick. Make it New Castle Brown, draft." Having said that, you storm off to return to the table with the other monsters, mumbling bitter curses to yourself.
  
  The Creature from the Black Lagoon has a tray full of shots for everyone and is waiting for you and Dracula to return.
  
  "Where are they now?" Wolfman says, staring in the direction of the dart board. "They're not playing darts anymore, that's for damn sure."
  
  The Creature from the Black Lagoon shrugs his shoulders. "I will allow them another five minutes before we consume their shots in their stead."
  
  "I'm already here." You say.
  
  The other monsters look around, attempting to locate the source of your comments. "Sitting at the table." You say. They nod their heads in understanding.
  
  "Where then, pray tell, is Dracula?" Creature from the black lagoon asks.
  
  "Getting me a beer." You reply. They nod in understanding. "Fucker hit me with a dart."
  
  "You can't really blame him for that." Wolfman says. "You're invisible, Invisible."
  
  "I was getting my darts off of the board when he started throwing. Those fucking darts aren't invisible!!" You say. Wolfman is such a dick.
  
  Dracula returns a few moments later and everyone grabs a shot glass, yourself included. The Creature from the Black Lagoon does the toast.
  
  "To friends reunited after a long absence. To The Mummy, for organizing it all, yet passing before everyone showed. And, perhaps most importantly, to Dr. Jekyll, for hooking us up with the dank before his evil counterpart Mr. Hyde could take over and smoke it all up."
  
  You all take down the shot. It's whiskey. Jim Beam. You hate Jim Beam. It has an after taste like butter.
  
  Frankenstein says something to everyone. "Nnnnnnnng."
  
  Your fellow monsters look baffled. "What the fuck did he just say?" Wolfman asks of Frankenstein's' wife.
  
  "How the hell am I supposed to know? He does this shit all day long. Unnng! Hnnng! I have no idea what the fuck he's saying. It drives me up the damn wall sometimes!" She replies.
  
  "Then why did you marry him?" You ask her.
  
  "You see a lot of guys lined up and waiting to marry a reanimated corpse?" She asks you. "I didn't think so."
  
  She leans closer to your position, bumping heads with you momentarily. "And just between you and me, the good Doctor Frankenstein must have found the biggest cock in the graveyard for my man."
  
  You fight back the urge to vomit and nearly fall out of your seat, appalled by her statement.
  
  "Unnnnnng!" Frankenstein says. The blunt is hanging out of his mouth.
  
  "It appears that our dear friend, Frankenstein, is ready to smoke down." says the Creature form the Black Lagoon.
  
  Frank nods and stands up, his wife standing beside him. Creature from the Black Lagoon and the Wolfman stand as well.
  
  "You coming Dracula?" The Wolfman asks.
  
  "Nah," He replies, "I don't fuck vith that shit no more."
  
  They turn to your general direction. "What about you, Invisible?" The Wolfman asks.
  
  Well? What about you.
  
  > stay behind
  Mrs. Frankenstein, the Wolfman, and the Creature from the Black Lagoon stand up immediately. They look between where they think you are and where Dracula is. Dracula waves them away, and you decline as well. You haven't smoked that stuff in years and there is no need to do so now.
  
  You sit across from Dracula in silence for a short while, he looking around the bar while you stare at the form of the Mummy who is passed out beside a mug of brew, face down on the table.
  
  "Are you still there, Invisible?" Dracula asks.
  
  "Yeah." You reply.
  
  "I have noticed something about this bar that does not sit so vell vith me." He says to you in a low tone.
  
  "What's that?" You ask.
  
  "Do you see any vimen in here?" He asks.
  
  You look around and are surprised to locate so few women within. But there are a few, and you point them out to lord of vampires.
  
  "No, no." He says. "That viman," He says pointing at one of the three you directed him to, "has a mustache. That vun has to be the most masculine looking viman I ever have seen. And that one," He says pointing to the third, "Has an erection."
  
  You take all of this in and realize he is right. "My word." You say aloud.
  
  "Yes," He says, "The Monsters Lounge is a gay monsters lounge."
  
  "Damn," You exclaim, "You are one observant fucking vampire."
  
  "I vish that vas the case. I vas actually tipped off to the fact vhen one of the men grabbed at my ass. You are lucky you are invisible in a situation like this." He says to you.
  
  "I guess so." You say, drinking more of your beer.
  
  "Why don't you go grab us some more beers?" You ask of him.
  
  "Give me some money, friend." He says to you.
  
  "I haven't got any." You reply. "Why don't you check and see if any one wants to buy you a drink?"
  
  "I don't think so, Invisible." He says.
  
  "Why not?" You ask. "You were apparently born with an attractive quality that members of your own gender cannot resist. Use this to your advantage, Dracula. Get us some free beer."
  
  He considers this for a moment. "You are right." He says. "I vill do so."
  
  As he stands up and begins his walk to the bar, you call after him with a reminder. "Just don't feed, Drac! You could get AIDS!"
  
  He displays to you the longest of his fingers as he goes to the bar.
  
  Your eyes stray once again to the unconscious form of the Mummy at the table. He hasn't so much as twitched once since you arrived, and you were kind of hoping to talk with him a little today.
  
  > try to wake him.
  You stand up and make your way over to the unconscious form of your mummified friend. He organized everything, and he really ought to be spending time with his old friends.
  
  You reach his side and give him a little shake. "Hey Mummy," you say, "Wake up, man."
  
  He doesn't stir, doesn't move, doesn't even make a noise. A cold lump of fear drops into your stomach, and you shake him again. "Mummy!" You shout next to his ear. "Wake up!"
  
  He doesn't react. You roll him onto his side and see foam spilling from his mouth from between his wrap. You fall back a few steps and cover your mouth with your hand. The mummy is dead.
  
  Dracula returns with two beers, he sets one on the table where you were sitting. "Here you go," he says.
  
  You walk up behind him and call out hid name. "Dracula." He jumps up in the air, his bones nearly coming free from his skin.
  
  "Don't do that to me!" He says. "You are such an asshole, Invisible!"
  
  "I think the Mummy is dead." You say.
  
  "Of course he is," he replies, "He's been like that for hundreds of years. They don't exactly mummify the living, you know?"
  
  "No," you say, "I mean he's dead."
  
  If the vampires face could pale any more than it already is, you're certain that he would be transparent. His mouth drops open and his eyes go wide with shock, as he takes a half dozen steps back. "Vhat...?" He said in that state of shock where you completely understand what is happening, but refuse to believe it.
  
  Just then the other monsters return from smoking outside. They walk over to Dracula and take their seats.
  
  "What's with you, Drac?" The Wolfman asks.
  
  "The Mummy...," He says.
  
  "Yeah," Wolfman replies, pointing to the form of the Mummy. "He's unconscious on the table over there."
  
  "He's dead." You say.
  
  "Yeah." Wolfman says. "That's how he became a monster in the first place."
  
  "No," You interject. "He's dead."
  
  Wolfman takes a hard swallow. "Someone call 911," he says.
  
  Frankenstein whips out a cellular phone and dials the numbers. "Nnnnnnnnnnng!" He says. "Nnnnnnnnnnng! NNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNGGGGGGGG!!! NNNNNNNG! Unnnnnnngggg!!" Then a pause. "NNNNNNNNNNNGGGGGG! Uuuuunnnnnng!! Unnnnnnnnnnn! Nnnnnnnnnnng-nnnnnnggg-unnnnnngg!!"
  
  Frankenstein waves his hands in the air fanatically as he attempts to communicate with the operator. "NNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNGGGGGGG!!! Unnnnnnnga-unnnnnnga!!"
  
  Mrs. Frankenstein rips the phone from his hand. "Oh for Christ's sake, give me that thing." She places the phone to her ear and tells the operator that there is "a dead body in the Monster Lounge".
  
  The ambulance arrives some twenty long minutes later. Everything happens like in one of those movies where they just rush the body away while some song dubs over all of the noises and voices of the bystanders.
  
  A couple of days later, you read in the paper that the Mummy died from a drug overdose. The obituary claimed that he had originally died some 1500 years ago. Somehow, they said, his body continued to roam the earth until it encountered a substance known as MDMA, which his body was not able to handle in the dose he had taken after mixing with alcohol.
  
  It was a sad way for the reunion to end.
  
  You wonder if anyone will try to organize another get together ever again with your group...