text: [Themes: Slice of life, Religious, Mystery, ghosts, religion, ghost hunt, Christianity, church]
  
  > look up gwen
  (Gwen)
  (in Casey's notes)
  You flick through the notes and read Casey's scrawly handwriting:
  "I'll tell you about the big painting at the bottom of the stairs, but first I have to tell you about Homeschooled Gwen.
  
  "Homeschooled Gwen, so called because she was totally homeschooled, went to our high school. Yes! She was not in fact completely homeschooled, because her parents sent her to West for seventh-period geometry, because they did not remember the quadratic formula. It is:
  x equals negative b plus or minus the square root of b squared minus 4ac, over 2a.
  
  "But Gwen's parents couldn't remember that, even though I, Casey, memorized it so easily. So Gwen went to West High. And she was in my Geometry class."
  
  You pause before flipping the page. This story barely seems relevant
  to the church, much less your investigation. Are you sure you want to keep reading?
  
  > Yes
  You turn the page:
  
  "So, due to being homeschooled, Gwen was not at all socialized for interacting with us teens of the modern era. What I am saying is that she was super weird. I was friends with her mostly out of morbid curiosity. Here are some of the weird stunts she pulled in Geometry: Told us all individually what breed of dog we would be if we were
  dogs. Read us stories, apparently like Wendy read to the Lost Boys. Gave us a survey about what we found attractive in girls.
  
  "When I say 'us' I mean just the boys in class. Gwen was super boy-crazy, because, due to being homeschooled all of her life, Gwen
  had never seen a boy before. Yes."
  
  This looks like it might be turning into an extended rant against the institution of homeschooling (Casey can be something of a jerk when it comes to things he knows nothing about). Do you want to continue?
  
  > Yes
  Casey goes on:
  
  "I mean she had probably seen a male human before. She had a dad; we found that out eventually. But you know what I mean.
  
  "Anyway one day after school, after seventh-period geometry, I was hanging out in the mud room waiting for my ride home, and Gwen was there too, waiting for her own ride back to her own horrible school-home hybrid, and then Patrick the youth leader showed
  up, because he's still allowed on school grounds. And he asked me
  about the lock-in."
  
  It is increasingly clear to you that this story has no bearing on your investigation. Do you want to keep reading it?
  
  > Yes
  You turn another page.
  
  "Or he asked me about something. Probably the lock-in. But we
  were talking, and Gwen was there, and Patrick the youth leader WITHOUT CONSULTING ME BEFOREHAND looks over at Gwen and asks her if she wants to come to the lock-in. And of course Gwen says yes, because there
  will be boys there.
  
  "Gwen came to the lock-in, and after that she started coming to the high school group meetings. And an unfortunate percentage of people in the group did not seem to catch on right away that Gwen was a nutbar, so she felt very welcome and emotionally supported by us, and when Patrick the youth leader opened the floor for 'discussion' after his sermons we all got to listen to her insane opinions about
  Thanksgiving, and family togetherness, and sex, etc., etc."
  
  You look up from the notes. Maybe there's something else you should be doing. Do you want to continue reading?
  
  > Yes
  "Then, this was around the end of last semester, Patrick the youth leader gave all of us in the group one of his CHALLENGES. His
  CHALLENGE to us this particular week was for us to think about our relationship to the church. I mean, like, 'spend the next seven days thinking about this, and come back next week with something really profound.' A lot of Patrick the youth leader's CHALLENGES are
  basically attempts to get us to say something profound.
  
  "And of course we all forgot about this CHALLENGE immediately, because come on. He never follows up on any of them anyway. He just read in some youth leader magazine that you should give your youth group CHALLENGES.
  
  "And when we came back the next week, of course, Patrick the youth leader doesn't bother asking anyone what brilliant answers we came up with to his incredibly vague CHALLENGE. We had a sermon and then we played Sardines or whatever.
  
  "But before we could leave, Patrick the youth leader called us all together, because Gwen had something to share with us."
  
  Keep reading?
  
  > Yes
  "Now that I think about it, she must have brought the painting in with her, left it behind a couch or something, and waited for three hours
  or however long for Patrick the youth leader to ask for people's answers to his CHALLENGE of the previous week. She was just too
  freaked out and embarrassed to bring it up herself, until the very
  last possible moment.
  
  "So yeah it was this painting. I'm not gonna bother describing this painting, because you can see it yourself. But if you think about it, all those tiny brushstrokes on a canvas that huge must have taken a zillion hours to do, and she supposedly only had a week to paint it. I guess that's what the church meant to Gwen."
  
  It goes on a little longer, but that feels like an end to the "substance" of the story, such as it is. Should you bother reading the rest?
  
  > Yes
  "Well, sometime during the summer, Gwen quit coming to the youth
  group. It took me a while to figure out what happened but it turns out she got grounded from church because her parents
  found out she had a crush on a boy who went there.
  
  "So, that is the story on Homeschooled Gwen. You will never meet her, because her parents will never let her out of the house again."
  
  > Go west
  No time to explore now. Sharon needs to know what's been going on.
  
  > look up nap
  (looking up "nap" in Casey's notes)
  You riffle through the notes, but you can't find anything that seems relevant.
  
  > look up the napping
  (looking up "napping" in Casey's notes)
  You riffle through the notes, but you can't find anything that seems relevant.
  
  > hide
  (in the glowing tissue paper)
  The glowing tissue paper wouldn't make much of a hiding spot.
  
  > look up the CHALLENGES
  (looking up "challenges" in Casey's notes)
  You riffle through the notes, but you can't find anything that seems relevant.
  
  > examine the photo of Orchid
  Orchid scowls out of the photo at you, her eyebrows scrunched and her mouth turned down at the corners.
  
  > examine Orchid
  Orchid, like most girls your age, is taller than you. Her cheeks are covered in freckles that you had never seen before tonight; she must put makeup on over them for school. You have the uneasy feeling that there are more freckles on her left cheek than her right.
  
  She notices you examining her, and you look away.
  
  > Kiss orchid
  The reason your overnight investigatory team had to consist of two girls was to minimize the chances of any funny business.
  
  > look up nativity
  (looking up "nativity" in Casey's notes)
  You riffle through the notes, but you can't find anything that seems relevant.
  
  > look up manger
  (in Casey's notes)
  You flick through the notes and read Casey's scrawly handwriting: "So last year, Orchid said she wanted to run the Christmas play. And
  Marcie Kempulfers, who always runs the Christmas play every year, thought that was a great idea. She said it would be really cute to
  have a little girl be in charge of the play. This was last year, so Orchid was either fifteen or sixteen years old, I think.
  
  "The first thing Orchid suggested was that they use a real baby to
  play the baby Jesus. Some church person had a baby, and Orchid,
  because she's completely a girl, was totally nuts for this baby. But Marcie says oh no, we always use a doll for the baby Jesus, real
  babies cause so many headaches.
  
  "You can see where this is going. But I'll write more about it in some other entries. This is Entry One of Four."
  
  > look up the entry two
  (looking up "entry two" in Casey's notes)
  You riffle through the notes, but you can't find anything that seems relevant.
  
  > look up marcie
  (in Casey's notes)
  You flick through the notes and read Casey's scrawly handwriting: "Marcie Kempulfers is in charge of the bell choir and that kind of thing and she's boring."
  
  > look up HANDBELLS
  (in Casey's notes)
  You flick through the notes and read Casey's scrawly handwriting:
  "Here is the deal with the handbells. Marcie Kempulfers is in charge
  of the bell choir. She has a very strict handbell protocol. The handbells are church property, and she says so frequently as people
  try to goof off in bell choir practice.
  
  "But Patrick the youth leader is not so uptight, and for this youth service he thought we should do a bell choir number, without any oversight by or permission from Marcie Kempulfers. He decided we
  should play 'Seek Ye First', because he could only force an octave's worth of kids to volunteer, and he thought it was an easy song. And it is an easy song. But we were poorly motivated.
  
  "So the youth service rolls around, and the extremely unofficial youth bell choir has yet to master our song. But we're listed in the
  program. We have to go out and perform, and when we perform this song we are going to butcher it.
  
  "Then, right before the service starts, Marcie Kempulfers shows up to have words with Patrick the youth leader. The effects of these words were, first of all, we were definitely not going to be performing a non-Kempulfers-supervised handbell piece, ever, and secondly, now Marcie takes the handbells home with her whenever they aren't being used at church.
  
  "I don't know why she doesn't take the case too."
  
  > look up mary
  (looking up "mary" in Casey's notes)
  You riffle through the notes, but you can't find anything that seems relevant.
  
  > look up joseph
  (looking up "joseph" in Casey's notes)
  You riffle through the notes, but you can't find anything that seems relevant.
  
  > look up christmas
  (looking up "christmas" in Casey's notes)
  You riffle through the notes, but you can't find anything that seems relevant.
  
  > look up nativity
  (looking up "nativity" in Casey's notes)
  You riffle through the notes, but you can't find anything that seems relevant.
  
  > look up play
  (looking up "play" in Casey's notes)
  You riffle through the notes, but you can't find anything that seems relevant.
  
  > look up cows
  (looking up "cows" in Casey's notes)
  You riffle through the notes, but you can't find anything that seems relevant.
  
  > look up crook
  (in Casey's notes)
  You flick through the notes and read Casey's scrawly handwriting: "Okay. Just as she's about to land, Orchid's robe gets caught on one
  of the shepherd's crooks, and the Engelgurt suffers a critical failure and Orchid falls to the floor and according to some witnesses almost dies. The whole service gets shut down so that Orchid can go to the emergency room, although I think all that happened was she sprained
  her ankle.
  
  "Of course, Orchid is in huge trouble with Marcie Kempulfers and with the church in general, but what does being in trouble with a church even mean? It's not like they can expel you. We're Methodists. They didn't even get rid of the Engelgurt; it's still in the storage room.
  
  "And anyway Orchid wasn't sorry at all. She kept saying, 'At least it was new!' 'At least it was exciting!' Because that's how she operates.
  
  "That's it. This is Entry Four of Four."
  
  > look up the robes
  Which do you mean, the choir robes or the neat stack of hempen robes?
  
  > look up the hempen robes
  (in Casey's notes)
  You flick through the notes and read Casey's scrawly handwriting: "So next Orchid says she wants the shepherds to sing a song. You have to understand that the shepherds are played by the littler kids, and the older kids play angels or Mary and Joseph or the wise men, and while every older kid ends up having to sing a song at some point, the shepherds do not. I think Orchid wanted them to sing 'Silent Night', which is a pretty good choice for little kids to sing. I will admit that Orchid made a good call here.
  
  "But Marcie did not agree. I'm pretty sure Marcie thinks that because it's impossible to get little kids to carry a tune or understand Italian music vocabulary, nobody wants to hear them sing in church, which is a critical misconception and I think indicates some sort of psychological defect in Marcie Kempulfers's brain. Anyway.
  
  "Marcie made up this insane justification to have the bell choir play 'Silent Night' instead. She said the bell choir had already practiced it, which was technically true, although specifically they had practiced it during the previous calendar year. But Marcie got her
  way.
  
  "I hope you're not reading this as me defending Orchid, because I
  would never do that. Don't worry; we will get to the part where Orchid is horrible in the next entry. This is Entry Two of Four."
  
  > look up the cloth signs
  (in Casey's notes)
  You flick through the notes and read Casey's scrawly handwriting: We hang up the cloth signs in the sanctuary for Advent. I think they say 'Hope', 'Wait', 'Expect', and 'Await'."
  
  > look up boiler room
  (in Casey's notes)
  You flick through the notes and read Casey's scrawly handwriting:
  "I've only been inside of the boiler room very briefly, but I have to assume it's a really cool place to hang out. Make sure you tell me all about it when you get the chance."
  
  > look up the blank page
  (looking up "blank page" in Casey's notes)
  You riffle through the notes, but you can't find anything that seems relevant.
  
  > look up black light
  (in Casey's notes)
  You flick through the notes and read Casey's scrawly handwriting:
  "Yes! This room! So, Patrick the youth leader got us together a few years ago and had us paint the walls of this room black, and then
  paint Bible verses on it, and then install black lights instead of normal lights, so it would look like a Christian rave or whatever. And I mean it looks fairly cool, I guess.
  
  "But when you have a dark room, with purple lights, and a bunch of couches, and then you invite teenagers into the room and leave them in that room unattended, what happens is, the teenagers will use that
  room for what Patrick the youth leader calls 'heavy petting'.
  
  "So that's why this room is called the Black Light Make-Out Room."
  
  > look up back room
  (in Casey's notes)
  You flick through the notes and read Casey's scrawly handwriting: "The back room is kind of a secret, I guess, although we use it as the 'backstage' whenever we do plays and that kind of thing. Nobody ever uses it as a hiding place when we're playing games, though. I guess it might be too obvious? Or maybe it's just too boring.
  
  "You can get to the basement from the back room, too: there's a
  sliding panel in the back wall, but to get it open, you have to apply some upward pressure to get it out of its groove a little bit. That's the real secret, I guess."
  
  > look up tunnel
  (in Casey's notes)
  You flick through the notes and read Casey's scrawly handwriting: "You might want to know where the tunnel is, because that's where the fuse box is. If I remember to draw a map for you then I'll make sure to point out the tunnel and stick it in here."
  
  There is no map.
  
  > look up fuse box
  (in Casey's notes)
  You flick through the notes and read Casey's scrawly handwriting: "The fuse box is in the tunnel. I don't know how it works. Ohms."
  
  > look up the tuna
  Which do you mean, the open can of tuna or the mass of tuna?
  
  > look up the mass of the tuna
  (in Casey's notes)
  On the subject of canned food Casey writes, "I'm pretty sure the
  people who are supposed to be in charge of donating stuff to the Food Bank are really disorganized, because you always see spare cans of stuff lying around. Or maybe some of the cans were rejected by the
  Food Bank. I don't know how it works."
  
  > look up the cables
  (in Casey's notes)
  But what is it? You're not sure what to look for in the notes.
  
  > look up sugarman
  (looking up "sugarman" in Casey's notes)
  You riffle through the notes, but you can't find anything that seems relevant.
  
  > look up cat
  (in Casey's notes)
  You riffle through the notes, but it looks like Casey didn't have anything to say about the cat.
  
  > Xyzzy
  You sneeze.
  
  > Go north
  A few steps up from the pews to the south are the preacher's pulpit, the altar, and the American and Christian flags. Behind them, to the north, is a tiny doorway.
  
  On the altar are two candles.
  
  A large cross hangs high on the wall above the altar.
  
  to the north.
  
  > Go north
  This is a far cry from the grandeur of the sanctuary. The walls are covered in some kind of dark wood panels, but they're shabby and windowless, and the floor is bare concrete. A huge wooden chest and a closet full of robes take up one wall. You can head back out to the altar to the south, or try the sliding door to the north.
  
  A stack of hymnals is crammed into one corner.
  
  Some more ectoplasm is smeared on the floor.
  
  The cat bounds downstairs.
  
  > Down
  Behind the sliding door you find a steep, narrow flight of stairs with no handrail. You walk down them slowly, not wanting to miss your footing in the dim light.
  
  You could hardly call this a room. It's just a long, musty, narrow space behind a wall. At one end, a flight of stairs runs up to the
  room behind the altar; at the other end a heavy door leads out to the south. In between them, a fuse box is mounted on the wall, its metal door hanging open to reveal a row of switches.
  
  A cheap-looking mirror, a black sphere and some black cloth are lying in a heap on the floor.
  
  The cat sits down underneath the fuse box and starts licking its paw.
  
  > examine the cloth
  Thick, heavy black cloth of some kind—a curtain or something, maybe.
  
  The cat scampers up the stairs.
  
  > examine the fuse
  Unlike some of the other switches, the "West Basement" switch actually has a legible label. It's also the only switch that's not turned on right now.
  
  > Up
  This is a far cry from the grandeur of the sanctuary. The walls are covered in some kind of dark wood panels, but they're shabby and windowless, and the floor is bare concrete. A huge wooden chest and a closet full of robes take up one wall. You can head back out to the altar to the south, or try the sliding door to the north.
  
  A stack of hymnals is crammed into one corner.
  
  Some more ectoplasm is smeared on the floor.
  
  > look up Bible
  (the huge Bible)
  (in Casey's notes)
  You flick through the notes and read Casey's scrawly handwriting: "But if you turn the lights on, you'll see there's a Bible on that podium. I'm pretty sure that Bible is worth hundreds of dollars. It has a lot of really nice pictures in it, at least. Don't mess with it."
  
  > examine Bible
  The Bible is obviously a well-respected object around here, but it's not a mere display piece; the pages have been creased and scuffed by continuous use.
  
  > look up podium
  (in Casey's notes)
  You flick through the notes and read Casey's scrawly handwriting: "You want to be careful if you're sneaking around the narthex in the dark, because there is a podium in there that is really, really easy to not notice, and the corners of that podium are right about at crotch level."
  
  > look up the genesis in Bible
  You can't seem to find exactly what you're looking for, but you do
  find this: "Then I saw a new heaven and a new earth, for the first heaven and the first earth had passed away, and the sea was no more."
  
  > examine the podium
  It resembles a miniature Roman column, although you think it would probably fall over in a stiff breeze.
  
  > hide
  What do you want to hide in?
  
  > hide in the chest
  You lie down inside the chest, and notice that there's plenty of space inside. It's not a bad spot.
  inside. It's not a bad spot.But there's no time for napping now.
  
  You pull yourself out of the box.
  
  > look up chest
  (in Casey's notes)
  You flick through the notes and read Casey's scrawly handwriting: "I don't know if we've ever used the chest in the back room for anything. I think Patrick the youth leader said they could keep sheet music in it, but fat chance of Marcie leaving her sheet music at church.
  
  "But it doesn't bother me if it's always empty. Sometimes I take naps in there."
  
  > Nap in chest
  The huge wooden chest would make a terrible bed.
  
  > go south
  You could hardly call this a room. It's just a long, musty, narrow space behind a wall. At one end, a flight of stairs runs up to the
  room behind the altar; at the other end a heavy door leads out to the south. In between them, a fuse box is mounted on the wall, its metal door hanging open to reveal a row of switches.
  
  A cheap-looking mirror, a black sphere and some black cloth are lying in a heap on the floor.
  
  (first opening the heavy door)
  The heavy door slips out of your fingers and slams shut behind you, leaving you in darkness.
  
  It is pitch dark, and you can't see a thing except for the dim light trickling in from the south end of the hallway.
  
  It's almost completely dark. At least you can still see the light at the south end of the hallway. The rectangles to the east and west must be doorways to somewhere, but they're barely distinguishable from the walls.
  
  > Go east
  Thanks to the light filtering in from the south end of the hall, you can make out some kind of mural painted on the wall, but you can't
  tell what it's supposed to represent in the gloom.
  
  The hallway runs north into darkness. It's hard to tell how long it might be from here, though the Sunday School room to the east provides some light at this end. The plywood lighthouse, on the other hand, peacefully fails to provide any light. Behind the lighthouse and partially obscured by it is a mural of Jesus blessing the little children.
  
  This is a room designed for small people. Low benches are arranged
  like pews in two rows, facing toward a small table that serves as an altar. A poster explaining the Ten Commandments hangs on one wall, and doors lead north to the basement stairway, east to the youth room and west to the hallway.
  
  The TV trolley is standing in the middle of the room, looking lonely.
  
  > Go north
  This room is apparently just for show; there are no tables or chairs.
  A wide staircase runs up to the main floor of the church, and doorways lead east to the nursery, south to the Sunday School room and north to the boiler room. Mounted on the wall is a gigantic abstract painting.
  
  This must be a fairly large room, but most of the space is given over to snaking pipes, anonymous machinery, and the church's giant boiler.
  
  > examine the pipes
  Many of the pipes run all the way down to the floor from their tangled maze in the ceiling, making some corners of the room impossible to reach.
  
  > examine the machinery
  A menagerie of valves and pressure gauges stick out from the pipes at awkward angles, some dangerously close to your eye level.
  
  > search pipes
  A menagerie of valves and pressure gauges stick out from the pipes at awkward angles, some dangerously close to your eye level.
  
  There are few gaps wide enough to stick your head through, and they only reveal more of the same scenery.
  
  > examine the boiler
  A massive faceless hulk of an appliance. You can hear it murmuring quietly to itself—or maybe you're hearing something else.
  
  > listen
  Now you can only hear air currents: the whisper of an empty building
  at night.
  
  > look at the painting
  The piece is very pleasant, if not particularly interesting: the inoffensive greens and pinks could suggest river waters, or branches waving in the wind. Its size is probably its most impressive quality.
  
  > examine the door
  Which do you mean, the ladies' room door, the men's room door, or the pastor's door?
  
  Which do you mean, the ladies' room door, the men's room door, or the pastor's door?
  
  > look at the Pastor
  seen, but the plaque on it reads, "Pastor Ivan Shearer."
  
  > look up ivan
  (in Casey's notes)
  You flick through the notes and read Casey's scrawly handwriting:
  "Good old Pastor Ivan! What can you say about someone like Pastor
  Ivan? Not much!"
  
  > Unlock Pastor
  You rattle the door handle, gently at first and then harder. Nothing happens.
  
  > Unlock Pastor
  happens....and then the alarm starts screaming at you.
  
  > go to the west
  This room is a bit crowded for your tastes: between the many round tables, each surrounded by a complement of folding chairs, there isn't much space to get from one end of the room to the other. The main stairway is north, the kitchen is east, and the narthex is west.
  
  One corner is given over to a glass case containing a model church.
  
  The main entryway to the church, this room has been set up to be as welcoming as possible. A rack of pamphlets sits in the center of a large table, flanked by pots of fake flowers. Lying open on a podium
  is a huge Bible. Pinned up on one wall is a board full of name tags.
  
  To the east is the fellowship hall, and the large passage to the north obviously leads to the main sanctuary. The way out of the church is south of here, but that's none of your concern currently.
  
  > examine tags
  There must be a name tag on here for everybody who's ever set foot in this church.
  
  The cat strolls in from the east and purrs at you.
  
  > go east
  The cat bounds into the fellowship hall ahead of you.
  
  This room is a bit crowded for your tastes: between the many round tables, each surrounded by a complement of folding chairs, there isn't much space to get from one end of the room to the other. The main stairway is north, the kitchen is east, and the narthex is west.
  
  One corner is given over to a glass case containing a model church.
  
  The cat wanders off to the north, glancing back at you as if to check whether you're following.
  
  > Smash case
  You have to assume you'd get in huge trouble if you broke anything.
  
  > look up ladies'
  (in Casey's notes)
  You flick through the notes and read Casey's scrawly handwriting: "Well, Robin. I actually explored the ladies' restroom briefly, during a game of Sardines. But then, because of events that transpired, the ladies' restroom was declared to be off-limits. And shortly after
  that, because of fairness, the men's restroom was declared to be off-limits as well. For Sardines purposes at least."
  
  > look up men'S
  (in Casey's notes)
  You flick through the notes and read Casey's scrawly handwriting: "If you have time, you should go ahead and take a look in the men's room, since who knows how many opportunities like this you'll have in the future. I won't spoil anything by describing it here."
  
  > look up the urinals
  (in Casey's notes)
  You flick through the notes and read Casey's scrawly handwriting: "The thing about the urinals in the men's room is, there are no divider walls in between them. I don't like it, Robin. I don't like it at
  all."
  
  > look up the potted meat food product
  (in Casey's notes)
  On the subject of canned food Casey writes, "I'm pretty sure the
  people who are supposed to be in charge of donating stuff to the Food Bank are really disorganized, because you always see spare cans of stuff lying around. Or maybe some of the cans were rejected by the
  Food Bank. I don't know how it works."
  
  > look up robin
  (the name tag)
  (in Casey's notes)
  You flick through the notes and read Casey's scrawly handwriting:
  "When the new pastor came, he insisted that everybody wear name tags all the time, but that didn't last long. Name tags are a pain."
  
  > look up camera
  kitchen, only more so. Long countertops line the walls, with cupboards and drawers underneath them. A break in the counters allows you to leave the kitchen via the door to the west, and on the far side of the room a sink is set into the counter.
  
  (in Casey's notes)
  You flick through the notes and read Casey's scrawly handwriting: "I'm really glad you're using a Polaroid to get proof of the ghost, because that's what Winona Ryder used in Beetlejuice to get proof of
  Alec Baldwin and Geena Davis.
  
  "Now that I think of it, in the movie, the ghosts didn't actually show up on the Polaroids. But that's probably not how it works in real life."
  
  > look up cross
  (the small white cross)
  (in Casey's notes)
  You flick through the notes and read Casey's scrawly handwriting:
  "Man, when I was a little kid in Sunday School, and we had those
  little kid Bible lessons, I always used to stare at that little white cross, to pass the time or something. I'm pretty sure I was too smart for Sunday School. Sunday School is a weird thing to be too smart for, I guess.
  
  "Although I guess when the high schoolers broke off to be their own mature group, that was basically the same thing. Kind of. In that situation it was because we were too cool for the junior high kids.
  But that's still really weird.
  
  "What I mean is, it's really weird for people who identify as Christians to also identify as being too cool for something."
  
  > look up the wooden cross
  (in Casey's notes)
  You flick through the notes and read Casey's scrawly handwriting: "If you ask me I think that big gnarly cross in the black light room is in kind of poor taste, mostly because of the barbed wire crown on top. It doesn't belong in a church, it belongs in a grungy music video, with some rotting steak or something.
  
  "I dunno, I feel like the torture of Christ isn't exactly radical? But I guess Patrick the youth leader likes it."
  
  > look up large cross
  (in Casey's notes)
  You flick through the notes and read Casey's scrawly handwriting: "A cross is not technically a crucifix unless there's a Jesus on it. We are not Catholics, so we have a plain old cross, and it suits us just fine."
  
  > look up the notes
  (in Casey's notes)
  You flick through the notes and read Casey's scrawly handwriting: "I know there's a lot of the church you haven't seen or that you don't remember, so I'm writing down everything I can think of. I feel like these notes will be an invaluable resource when I get older and feel the need to revisit the carefree days of my youth, so make sure you give them back to me."
  
  > look up the candles
  (in Casey's notes)
  You flick through the notes and read Casey's scrawly handwriting: "Churches are all about candles. I bet 30% of any given church's
  budget is probably spent on candles and candle paraphernalia. But can you imagine a church without candles? No, you can't."
  
  > look up kitchen
  (in Casey's notes)
  You flick through the notes and read Casey's scrawly handwriting: "If you've seen Jurassic Park then the kitchen is really scary in
  the dark. If you haven't seen Jurassic Park then you should
  get around to that."
  
  > look up sink
  (in Casey's notes)
  You riffle through the notes, but it looks like Casey didn't have anything to say about the kitchen sink.
  
  > look up the matches
  (looking up "matches" in Casey's notes)
  You riffle through the notes, but you can't find anything that seems relevant.
  
  > look up match
  (looking up "match" in Casey's notes)
  You riffle through the notes, but you can't find anything that seems relevant.
  
  > look up light
  (the light switch)
  (in Casey's notes)
  You flick through the notes and read Casey's scrawly handwriting: "I don't have much to say about the lights. Sometimes there's a problem and you have to go mess with the fuse box. But in your case it doesn't matter, because you should be leaving the lights off anyway! You're hunting a ghost!"
  
  > look up sharon
  (in Casey's notes)
  You flick through the notes and read Casey's scrawly handwriting: "Why do people like Sharon want to become teachers? (By 'people like
  Sharon' I mean 'people who obviously hate everything about teaching, even and especially students'.) If you're already completely jaded and cynical after your first semester of student teaching, isn't that a sign that you should give up on K-12 education and possibly on life in general?"
  
  "No thanks," you say.