text: [Themes: Casual Simulation, orphans, orphanage, corporal punishment, simulation, grooming]
  
  > Look around
  Here are housed the younger children, from the age of weaning to about six years old. Formerly a lumber-room, its ceilings are oppressively low. The Middle House is to the north.
  
  Griselda, Hubert, Percy and Tawny are shedding parasites, encrustations and chunks of skin in My First Delousing Bath.
  
  A pack of savage Ruritanian Mastiffs patrol the grounds.
  
  In one corner, piled up into a small mountain, are the many volumes of Polychromatic Lung's Fairy Tales.
  
  Molly is spending some time in The Box.
  
  > Go north
  This ward is the home of children aged between six and twelve. A series of oddly-shaped rooms produced by ill-considered renovations, it's difficult to heat, the lighting is bad and there are far too many blind corners and hideaways. The Junior House lies south and the Senior north.
  
  A pack of savage Ruritanian Mastiffs patrol the grounds.
  
  Edie, Becky and Frannie are housed here.
  
  Maud and Mildred are busily occupied with the ancient tricycles.
  
  > assign Edie to tricycles
  You command Edie Dillinger to occupy herself with the ancient tricycles. She obediently complies.
  
  > assign Becky to the tricycles
  You command Becky Criggledip to occupy herself with the ancient tricycles. She obediently complies.
  
  > Discipline mildred
  You apply some well-deserved discipline to Mildred Chollop. Her discipline is now poor.
  
  > Discipline frannie
  You apply some well-deserved discipline to Frannie Harris. Her discipline is now poor.
  
  > go north
  Here reside the oldest children, aged roughly twelve to fifteen. The largest, best-lit and airiest of the wards, its walls are decorated with inspiring murals. The Middle House lies to the south.
  
  A pack of savage Ruritanian Mastiffs patrol the grounds.
  
  Jim, Gretchen, Agatha, Cob and Dorinda are housed here.
  
  > assign Jim to Box
  In icy tones, you condemn Jim Tench to The Box until further notice. He folds himself into one of its compartments, and you lock the door.
  
  > ring bell
  The ancient tricycles have fortified Edie Dillinger's vigour, which is now bad.
  My First Delousing Bath has brightened Griselda Much's looks, which are now poor.
  The Box has weakened Jim Tench's morale, which is now bad.
  The Box has sapped Jim Tench's vigour, which is now poor.
  The Box has stiffened Jim Tench's discipline, which is now poor.
  The ancient tricycles have fortified Maud Barnacle's vigour, which is now mediocre.
  My First Delousing Bath has brightened Tawny Scraggley's looks, which are now poor.
  My First Delousing Bath has brightened Hubert Dobson's looks, which are now mediocre.
  The Box has weakened Molly Bogey's morale, which is now mediocre.
  The Box has stiffened Molly Bogey's discipline, which is now poor.
  The ancient tricycles have fortified Becky Criggledip's vigour, which is now poor.
  The ancient tricycles have fortified Mildred Chollop's vigour, which is now mediocre.
  
  You receive a government stipend of 150 for the feeding and care of your orphans; and pay out 45 coins on necessary care and maintenance, most of it going on food.
  Your profligate meal plans have borne fruit: Tawny Scraggley and Dorinda Twite have gained vigour, and Jim Tench, Frannie Harris, Becky Criggledip, Dorinda Twite and Cob Froome have improved their morale.
  
  Agatha Dorrit has reached the age of maturity, and there is nothing more you can do. She is lost to gainful industry and to virtue, and promptly becomes a baby-farmer. (Good discipline is the surest path to a respectable job, though employers also favour those with high vigour and looks).
  
  A new orphan, Madison Codscrote, has been entrusted to your care and is now housed in the Junior House.
  
  > Unassign jim
  You allow Jim Tench to take a break.
  
  A new task: Tympanic Panic
  The popular music-hall ensemble Fariq Nasty and his Timpani Five is due to appear at the local auditorium. According to this leaflet, distributed by the Solemn Order of Platypii Ladies' Moral Auxiliary, Mr. Nasty's lyrics promote street grammar, kissing one's fiancee, regicide, Palestinian independence, bro-hugs, jeepform RPGs, immoderate use of snuff and sacrificing virgin blood to Bel-Marduk. The good Ladies intend to mount a campaign of protest, and as its centrepiece they need a child who has been ruined by Fariq's lascivious kettledrums, or at least appears so. Improving the moral tone of your community should, they imply, be reward enough. (Use RECRUIT on a suitable orphan.)
  
  > Status
  Griselda   bad          poor         poor         poor
  Jim        mediocre     bad          poor         poor
  Gretchen   poor         mediocre     poor         awful
  Madison    bad          awful        bad          poor
  Maud       poor         mediocre     mediocre     mediocre
  Tawny      mediocre     bad          poor         mediocre
  Hubert     poor         bad          mediocre     poor
  Molly      poor         bad          satisfactory poor
  Frannie    poor         poor         mediocre     poor
  Becky      mediocre     poor         adequate     mediocre
  Percy      mediocre     poor         bad          adequate
  Mildred    mediocre     adequate     mediocre     bad
  Dorinda    mediocre     mediocre     mediocre     bad
  Cob        mediocre     poor         poor         mediocre
  
  > recruit Jim
  The Ladies' Moral Auxiliary are in a hurry to put their campaign together, and have no time to question your choice. Jim is escorted to Platypus Hall to prepare for his first appearance.
  
  > go south
  This ward is the home of children aged between six and twelve. A series of oddly-shaped rooms produced by ill-considered renovations, it's difficult to heat, the lighting is bad and there are far too many blind corners and hideaways. The Junior House lies south and the Senior north.
  
  A pack of savage Ruritanian Mastiffs patrol the grounds.
  
  Edie, Becky, Maud and Mildred are busily occupied with the ancient tricycles.
  
  Frannie is housed here.
  
  > go south
  Here are housed the younger children, from the age of weaning to about six years old. Formerly a lumber-room, its ceilings are oppressively low. The Middle House is to the north.
  
  A pack of savage Ruritanian Mastiffs patrol the grounds.
  
  In one corner, piled up into a small mountain, are the many volumes of Polychromatic Lung's Fairy Tales.
  
  Madison is housed here.
  
  Griselda, Hubert, Percy and Tawny are shedding parasites, encrustations and chunks of skin in My First Delousing Bath.
  
  Molly is spending some time in The Box.
  
  > Status
  Griselda   bad          poor         poor         poor
  Jim        poor         poor         mediocre     poor
  Gretchen   poor         mediocre     mediocre     awful
  Madison    bad          bad          awful        mediocre
  Maud       poor         mediocre     mediocre     adequate
  Tawny      mediocre     poor         poor         mediocre
  Hubert     mediocre     bad          adequate     poor
  Molly      poor         poor         satisfactory mediocre
  Frannie    poor         poor         mediocre     poor
  Becky      mediocre     poor         adequate     mediocre
  Percy      poor         mediocre     poor         mediocre
  Mildred    mediocre     mediocre     mediocre     poor
  Dorinda    poor         poor         mediocre     bad
  Cob        mediocre     poor         poor         mediocre
  
  > discipline madison
  You apply some well-deserved discipline to Madison Codscrote. Her discipline is now poor.
  
  > assign Madison to Bath
  You unceremoniously dunk Madison Codscrote into the Delousing Bath, and command her to remain there until she she has learned a lesson about hygiene.
  
  > discipline griselda
  You apply some well-deserved discipline to Griselda Much. Her discipline is now poor.
  
  > Status
  Griselda   poor         bad          bad          poor
  Jim        poor         poor         poor         poor
  Gretchen   poor         mediocre     mediocre     bad
  Madison    poor         awful        bad          poor
  Maud       poor         mediocre     mediocre     adequate
  Tawny      mediocre     poor         poor         mediocre
  Hubert     poor         bad          adequate     mediocre
  Molly      poor         poor         adequate     mediocre
  Frannie    mediocre     poor         mediocre     poor
  Becky      mediocre     poor         mediocre     mediocre
  Percy      mediocre     mediocre     poor         adequate
  Mildred    poor         mediocre     mediocre     poor
  Dorinda    mediocre     poor         mediocre     bad
  Cob        mediocre     poor         mediocre     poor
  
  > scrub Griselda
  You seize Griselda, pinch her cheeks until they take on a healthy red colour, and apply a rough brush to those parts of her person that she has neglected to keep to a hygienic standard. This accomplished, you deliver a short lecture on the spiritual and bacterial dangers of filthiness. Hopefully the lesson is learned; her looks are now poor.
  
  > go to the north
  This ward is the home of children aged between six and twelve. A series of oddly-shaped rooms produced by ill-considered renovations, it's difficult to heat, the lighting is bad and there are far too many blind corners and hideaways. The Junior House lies south and the Senior north.
  
  A pack of savage Ruritanian Mastiffs patrol the grounds.
  
  Edie, Becky, Maud and Mildred are busily occupied with the ancient tricycles.
  
  Frannie is housed here.
  
  > Unassign maud
  You allow Maud Barnacle to take a break.
  
  > assign Maud to box
  Knowing that it will do her good, you condemn Maud Barnacle to The Box until further notice. She folds herself into one of its compartments, and you lock the door.
  
  > Status
  Griselda   poor         poor         poor         poor
  Jim        poor         bad          mediocre     poor
  Gretchen   poor         mediocre     mediocre     awful
  Madison    poor         awful        bad          poor
  Maud       poor         mediocre     mediocre     adequate
  Tawny      poor         poor         poor         mediocre
  Hubert     mediocre     bad          mediocre     mediocre
  Molly      poor         bad          adequate     poor
  Frannie    mediocre     poor         mediocre     poor
  Becky      mediocre     poor         mediocre     mediocre
  Percy      mediocre     mediocre     poor         mediocre
  Mildred    mediocre     adequate     mediocre     bad
  Dorinda    mediocre     poor         mediocre     bad
  Cob        mediocre     poor         mediocre     mediocre
  
  > assign Frannie to the tricycles
  You command Frannie Harris to occupy herself with the ancient tricycles. She obediently complies.
  
  > ring bell
  The ancient tricycles have fortified Edie Dillinger's vigour, which is now mediocre.
  My First Delousing Bath has brightened Griselda Much's looks, which are now mediocre.
  My First Delousing Bath has brightened Madison Codscrote's looks, which are now poor.
  The Box has weakened Maud Barnacle's morale, which is now poor.
  The Box has sapped Maud Barnacle's vigour, which is now poor.
  The Box has stiffened Maud Barnacle's discipline, which is now mediocre.
  My First Delousing Bath has brightened Tawny Scraggley's looks, which are now mediocre.
  My First Delousing Bath has brightened Hubert Dobson's looks, which are now adequate.
  The Box has weakened Molly Bogey's morale, which is now poor.
  The Box has stiffened Molly Bogey's discipline, which is now poor.
  The ancient tricycles have fortified Frannie Harris's vigour, which is now poor.
  The ancient tricycles have fortified Becky Criggledip's vigour, which is now mediocre.
  My First Delousing Bath has brightened Percy Dabney's looks, which are now poor.
  
  You receive a government stipend of 150 for the feeding and care of your orphans; and pay out 45 coins on necessary care and maintenance, most of it going on food.
  Your profligate meal plans have borne fruit: Griselda Much, Frannie Harris, Becky Criggledip and Cob Froome have gained vigour, and Jim Tench has improved his morale.
  
  Tawny Scraggley and Hubert Dobson have grown up a little, and been transferred to the Middle House.
  
  > Status
  Griselda   poor         poor         mediocre     poor
  Jim        mediocre     poor         mediocre     poor
  Gretchen   poor         mediocre     poor         bad
  Madison    poor         abysmal      poor         poor
  Maud       mediocre     mediocre     mediocre     poor
  Tawny      poor         poor         mediocre     mediocre
  Hubert     poor         bad          satisfactory mediocre
  Molly      poor         poor         adequate     poor
  Frannie    mediocre     mediocre     mediocre     poor
  Becky      mediocre     mediocre     mediocre     mediocre
  Percy      poor         mediocre     poor         adequate
  Mildred    poor         mediocre     mediocre     bad
  Dorinda    mediocre     poor         mediocre     bad
  Cob        mediocre     mediocre     mediocre     mediocre
  
  > scrub Edie
  You seize Edie, delouse her scalp with carbolic acid, and make her dedicate a few hours to shining her shoes. This accomplished, you deliver a short lecture on the spiritual and bacterial dangers of filthiness. Hopefully the lesson is learned; her looks are now poor.
  
  > go south
  Here are housed the younger children, from the age of weaning to about six years old. Formerly a lumber-room, its ceilings are oppressively low. The Middle House is to the north.
  
  A pack of savage Ruritanian Mastiffs patrol the grounds.
  
  In one corner, piled up into a small mountain, are the many volumes of Polychromatic Lung's Fairy Tales.
  
  Madison, Griselda and Percy are shedding parasites, encrustations and chunks of skin in My First Delousing Bath.
  
  Molly is spending some time in The Box.
  
  > Discipline percy
  You apply some well-deserved discipline to Percy Dabney. His discipline is now poor.
  
  > discipline griselda
  You apply some well-deserved discipline to Griselda Much. Her discipline is now poor.
  
  > discipline madison
  You apply some well-deserved discipline to Madison Codscrote. Her discipline is now mediocre.
  
  > read the catalog
  A respected specialist catering to the orphan management trade, Fobberfish of Hackney provides a wide variety of goods at virtually affordable rates. Bowing to the decadence of the age, this once-respectable publication now features many vain luxuries that you can safely ignore, such as fair-trade gruel, artisanal wildflower soap, and smallpox vaccines. The few items of real utility have been circled in red pen:
  
  Atherton's Ergonomic Treadmill (400 coins)
  Spinal Corrective Corsets (450 coins)
  Dr. Pranger's Lithium Water (700 coins)
  The Harvest of Sin (700 coins)
  
  > ring bell
  The ancient tricycles have fortified Edie Dillinger's vigour, which is now mediocre.
  My First Delousing Bath has brightened Griselda Much's looks, which are now adequate.
  Polychromatic Lung's Fairy Tales has improved Griselda Much's morale, which is now poor.
  The Box has weakened Molly Bogey's morale, which is now bad.
  The Box has sapped Molly Bogey's vigour, which is now bad.
  The Box has stiffened Molly Bogey's discipline, which is now mediocre. Polychromatic Lung's Fairy Tales has improved Molly Bogey's morale, which is now poor.
  The ancient tricycles have fortified Frannie Harris's vigour, which is now mediocre.
  The ancient tricycles have fortified Becky Criggledip's vigour, which is now adequate.
  My First Delousing Bath has brightened Percy Dabney's looks, which are now mediocre.
  Polychromatic Lung's Fairy Tales has improved Percy Dabney's morale, which is now mediocre.
  
  Mildred Chollop attempted to escape, but failed to get past the Ruritanian Mastiffs.
  
  You receive a government stipend of 150 for the feeding and care of your orphans; and pay out 45 coins on necessary care and maintenance, most of it going on food.
  Your profligate meal plans have borne fruit: Becky Criggledip has gained vigour, and Jim Tench and Madison Codscrote have improved their morale.
  
  Dorinda Twite has reached the age of maturity, and there is nothing more you can do. She is lost to gainful industry and to virtue, and promptly becomes a bondage model.
  Griselda Much and Madison Codscrote have been moved to the Middle House, being of sufficient age. Mildred Chollop is ready for the Senior.
  
  > Unassign Molly
  You allow Molly Bogey to take a break.
  
  Not only does Jim Tench look appropriately pathetic, he demonstrates a remarkable ability to weep on cue, elaborate in chilling detail about the timpani lifestyle from which he was rescued, and go into seizures at the sight of a felt mallet. Fariq Nasty has to flee town under cover of darkness to escape tar-and-feathering, the Timpani Five are barred from respectable auditoria across the country, and the Ladies' Auxiliary return Jim Tench with a small expression of their gratitude.
  
  > Status
  Griselda   poor         bad          mediocre     poor
  Jim        mediocre     poor         poor         mediocre
  Gretchen   poor         poor         poor         bad
  Madison    mediocre     abysmal      poor         poor
  Maud       poor         mediocre     poor         poor
  Tawny      mediocre     bad          mediocre     mediocre
  Hubert     poor         poor         adequate     poor
  Molly      mediocre     abysmal      adequate     poor
  Frannie    mediocre     adequate     mediocre     poor
  Becky      mediocre     adequate     adequate     poor
  Percy      poor         poor         mediocre     adequate
  Mildred    mediocre     mediocre     mediocre     poor
  Cob        mediocre     poor         poor         mediocre
  
  > read about the treadmill
  (in Fobberfish of Hackney's catalogue):
  Atherton's Ergonomic Treadmill produces a negligible quantity of electrical power, but (more importantly) its persistent use strengthens the thighs, calves and buttocks of older children, while teaching them the value of a hard day's work.
  
  > read about the Water
  (in Fobberfish of Hackney's catalogue):
  The world-renowned Dr. Pranger has discovered that pathological and criminal behaviours are rooted in patterns of thought established in childhood. Attempts to improve society will inevitably fail, therefore, without a bold application of behavioural pharmacology from earliest youth, particularly in those classes that produce the overwhelming mass of the criminal and insane. His patented Lithium Formula, added to the drinking-water of your orphanage, juvenile prison, refugee camp or poor-house, is the necessary first step to a brighter future.
  
  > go south
  What you do outside work hours and the Orphanorium is not the concern of this story. (The Middle House is to the north.)