text: [Themes: The Owl Consults Extended Universe]
  
  > go downward
  This room is garishly appointed with the hunting trophies Dashing must have scavenged throughout the world: hulking bears and moose from the Americas, lions from Africa, elephants from the Orient, and a menagerie of creatures even I barely recognize. While I obviously don't approve of his vicious little hobby, I have to admit that he at least has a healthy respect for nature.
  
  Exits lead north, west, and east (the last being through a heavy metal door), and a spiral staircase elegantly winds upward.
  
  I can see a green book and a display case (which contains a cudgel and a harpoon) here.
  
  > Examine book
  Dashing's book? I've met the man in real life; his writing can't be any better. I am paying you to consult me, though, so I'll follow your advice. Here, under protest, is an excerpt from the book.
  
  And I, the illustrious Captain Rex Dashing, bravely set out to
  fight the sludge monster! A lesser man might have blenched at such a foe, but not Rex Dashing! Years of bravely exploring the farthest corners of the earth had proven my resolve! Besides, the hero never backs down! I fired a few rounds from my shotgun into it, but it didn't even notice! I even smote it with the butt of my gun, but the gelatinous fiend just ignored it! But every gentleman explorer has a backup plan! I wrested a spear from one of my guides and pierced the monster with it! Even though shooting or bludgeoning was ineffective against the monster, the sharp point of the spear cut through its slimy hide like paper! When I returned to the ship, the unspoiled women of the village were so impressed with my valor that---
  
  I think that's a good place to stop.
  
  > put the mace in the display
  All right, I've put the mace into the display case.
  
  > Go north
  I'm standing at the edge of a vast tank, above which a cage is suspended. Fortunately, I'm no longer in the cage. I know you're already aware of that fact; I just like repeating it. There is a prominent red button on the wall, and an exit leads south. There's also a trapdoor high overhead.
  
  I can see a vacuum flask (which is closed) and a steel cage here.
  
  > hit the flask with the harpoon
  I give the flask a sound thrashing, but I don't succeed in dislodging the ice. It's frozen solid; brute force won't work.
  
  > hit the octopus with the harpoon
  I've put up a good show knocking it around a bit, but I'm afraid I don't seem have done much permanent damage. It's still burbling threateningly in the tank.
  
  > Go south
  This room is garishly appointed with the hunting trophies Dashing must have scavenged throughout the world: hulking bears and moose from the Americas, lions from Africa, elephants from the Orient, and a menagerie of creatures even I barely recognize. While I obviously don't approve of his vicious little hobby, I have to admit that he at least has a healthy respect for nature.
  
  Exits lead north, west, and east (the last being through a heavy metal door), and a spiral staircase elegantly winds upward.
  
  I can see a green book and a display case (which contains a mace and a cudgel) here.
  
  > go east
  This room is filled with the trophies from Dashing's safaris throughout the world, or at least what he claims to be his trophies. It used to be filled with my awards and accolades for SCIENTIFIC BRILLIANCE, rather than the grubby souvenirs of a cretinous lout. But the world will soon feel my ATOMIC FURY once again, with your help.
  
  Exits lead fore, port, and starboard (the last through a heavy metal door), and a staircase leads up.
  
  I can see a green book and a display case (which contains a mace and a cudgel) here.
  
  > Go upward
  The middle deck of the ship is a vast open space surrounded glass windows. I intended to use it for astronomical research; I'm sure Dashing has been using it as a ballroom, or something similarly ridiculous. Exits lead port and starboard, and there is a mahogany door fore. A gangway and staircase connect this deck with the ones above and below, respectively.
  
  I can see a klaxon here.
  
  > Go west
  I'm in the radio room, where Rex Dashing stammers out insipid, exaggerated tales of his "adventures" to a doting populace. I designed this room to broadcast my insight and demands to the captive world, not to entertain it with children's stories. The communications equipment looks to have escaped the worst of Dashing's SCIENTIFIC INCOMPETENCE, fortunately. The exit back to the lower deck is to starboard.
  
  Aha, the radio room! As a PROFESSOR of science, it is my duty to enlighten the worthless masses and broadcast my scientific brilliance throughout the world. This room should be just the place.
  
  > look at the microphone
  The setup here is perfect for broadcasting my demands to the captive world! No wonder Dashing has left this room alone; he has much narrower ambitions.
  
  > examine the equipment
  Which do you mean, the relay or the communications gear?
  
  > examine the relay
  It's a radio system, somehow intact despite Dashing's incompetence. It's currently off; closing the relay would cause it to start broadcasting.
  
  > examine the gear
  It's a standard bank of radio equipment, complete with microphone and communications relay.
  
  > talk to the microphone
  The radio is off. It must be supplied with ELECTRICAL POWER for me to broadcast to the masses, but the airship is running on emergency power; there's not enough left for the radio.
  
  > Line 1
  You switch back to Amelia on line 1.
  
  The airship's guest suite is bare and uninviting, possibly a ploy by Dashing to make his own room more appealing. There is a bed, of course, and a tacky rug is underfoot. The only exit is to the west.
  
  There is a small desk next to the bed.
  
  > go to the west
  What a dreary conglomeration of stainless steel and Bakelite! There are enormous cabinets set into the walls, with a long metal counter on top. Most of the equipment here is sadly of the physical rather than life science variety, but I do recognize a terrarium here. There is an exit to the east.
  
  I can see a terrarium (which contains a gecko) and a metal enclosure (which is open and contains a large red lever) here.
  
  > pull the lever
  The lights here flare up again, and the room is once again brightly lit. With that and the now-familiar thunking of machinery, the ship must have returned to main power.
  
  > Line 2
  You switch back to Dirk on line 2.
  
  I'm in the radio room, where Rex Dashing stammers out insipid, exaggerated tales of his "adventures" to a doting populace. I designed this room to broadcast my insight and demands to the captive world, not to entertain it with children's stories. The communications equipment looks to have escaped the worst of Dashing's SCIENTIFIC INCOMPETENCE, fortunately. The exit back to the lower deck is to starboard.
  
  > talk to the microphone
  I've practiced this a thousand times. All right, let's begin.
  
  COWER, PITIFUL INSECTS! You are hearing the words of your intellectual superior! I address you from the doomed airship Mephistopheles, former den of that smirking impecile, Rex Dashing. "Former," I say, because soon nothing will remain of it but a cloud of radioactive ash. As for the good captain himself, he's fled like the worthless coward he is. Nothing can stop Professor DIRK RADON, the IRRADIATABLE MAN! Bwahahahahaha!
  
  [Your fee has just gone up by $3 million.]
  
  > go east
  Not now, Owl! I'm busy with matters of SUPREME importance.
  
  Ignorant sheeple! You cling to your obsolete beliefs because you can't handle the obvious truth of my scientific revelations! You are nothing but the thoughtless guardians of a hidebound orthodoxy that lacks the courage to recognize that it has been wrong for centuries. And you HAVE been wrong, and you have wronged me, and I WILL have my revenge.
  
  > wait
  Not now, Owl! I'm busy with matters of SUPREME importance.
  
  My brilliance was ignored at university, when my so-called 'peers' chose to stick their heads in the sand rather than recognize that I had overturned the entire history of scientific thought. I should be running a physics lab with an iron fist, but I was unjustly ignored; now, I'll have to settle for ruling the ENTIRE WORLD with an iron fist. Try to ignore me now, you worthless buffoons!
  
  > Line 1
  You switch back to Amelia on line 1.
  
  What a dreary conglomeration of stainless steel and Bakelite! There are enormous cabinets set into the walls, with a long metal counter on top. Most of the equipment here is sadly of the physical rather than life science variety, but I do recognize a terrarium here. There is an exit to the east.
  
  I can see a terrarium (which contains a gecko) and a metal enclosure (which is open and contains a large red lever) here.
  
  > Go east
  This room is garishly appointed with the hunting trophies Dashing must have scavenged throughout the world: hulking bears and moose from the Americas, lions from Africa, elephants from the Orient, and a menagerie of creatures even I barely recognize. While I obviously don't approve of his vicious little hobby, I have to admit that he at least has a healthy respect for nature.
  
  Exits lead north, west, and east (the last being through a heavy metal door), and a spiral staircase elegantly winds upward.
  
  I can see a green book and a display case (which contains a mace and a cudgel) here.
  
  > unlock the door with the lockpicks
  Done. That sound you hear in the background, Owl, is an alarm going off. I trust you have something in mind; I'm not going to be useful as a sneak-thief if I can't sneak around.
  
  [Your zeta-wave transmitter system abruptly switches to line
  2.]
  What is that accursed noise? It must be the reactor alarm, but how could... No matter, time for ACTION! Just a moment, Owl, I'm going to run up to the main deck and take a look at the reactor.
  
  What, can it be?! AMELIA DERRINGER, you vile leech! The time has come at last for you to DIE!
  
  Aaargh, my eyes! You think you're a pugilist, eh? Well, have a taste of my ATOMIC death ray!
  
  Oh no! It's gone critical! It's going to blow! No! Get off me! I need to vent the---
  
  You hear an explosion, followed by static. It seems you may not be getting paid this time around.
  
  > look at the button
  It's just a simple black button.
  
  > stab the button with the harpoon
  I'd prefer to avoid violence unless absolutely necessary. It's not a matter or morals or squeamishness, you understand, but rather style.
  
  > Answer line 1
  You're already on line 1 with Amelia.
  
  > examine klaxon
  It's a klaxon, mercifully silent for now. There's a small black button on the side of it.
  
  > hold the button
  That seems to be part of the klaxon.
  
  > pull the button
  It is fixed in place.
  
  > Examine button
  This button is the override for the klaxon, allowing someone---namely, ME---to shut off the alarm. I don't want my research interrupted every time a robot trips an alarm.
  
  > Go west
  I'm in the radio room, where Rex Dashing stammers out insipid, exaggerated tales of his "adventures" to a doting populace. I designed this room to broadcast my insight and demands to the captive world, not to entertain it with children's stories. The communications equipment looks to have escaped the worst of Dashing's SCIENTIFIC INCOMPETENCE, fortunately. The exit back to the lower deck is to starboard.
  
  > Answer line 1
  You switch back to Amelia on line 1.
  
  This room is garishly appointed with the hunting trophies Dashing must have scavenged throughout the world: hulking bears and moose from the Americas, lions from Africa, elephants from the Orient, and a menagerie of creatures even I barely recognize. While I obviously don't approve of his vicious little hobby, I have to admit that he at least has a healthy respect for nature.
  
  Exits lead north, west, and east (the last being through a heavy metal door), and a spiral staircase elegantly winds upward.
  
  I can see a green book and a display case (which contains a mace and a cudgel) here.
  
  > Ascend
  The beautiful open sky is around me here on the top deck of the ship. It's a pleasant setting; a high railing even protects me from most of the wind. The view is spoiled somewhat by a garish metal structure to the west, but there are smaller rooms to the north and east. A gangway leads down to the lower decks.
  
  Motionless robots litter the deck. Even deactivated, they're still imposing.
  
  I can also see a vacuum flask (which is closed) and an orange striped lever here.
  
  > open the door with the lockpicks
  Done. That sound you hear in the background, Owl, is an alarm going off. I trust you have something in mind; I'm not going to be useful as a sneak-thief if I can't sneak around.
  
  [Your zeta-wave transmitter system abruptly switches to line
  2.]
  What is that accursed noise? It must be the reactor alarm, but how could... No matter, time for ACTION! Just a moment, Owl, I'm going to run up to the main deck and take a look at the reactor.
  
  What the---AMELIA DERRINGER? Amelia, you shape-shifting sneak-thief! YOUR TIME HAS COME!
  
  Ow! Well, that didn't go as I expected. You've picked up some tricks in the Far East, have you? Well, I'll have you know, I'm on the line with the Owl, and so I'm sure I'll have a stratagem to dispatch you AT ANY MOMENT.
  
  Well, that's got her angry. Hey, what should I do here? She's pulled her jewelry off her neck and eaten it. Wait, was that ivory? This helmet may be ATOMIC, but it's not elephant-proof!
  
  You hear an impressive bout of crunching and screaming. After a moment, Amelia Derringer's voice comes over line 2.
  
  Hello, Owl. Derringer here. It seems you've been playing me for a fool. You've just made yourself a mortal enemy, haven't you? And I do believe you've just heard an example of the sort of things my mortal enemies can expect to get. How well hidden are you, I wonder? I suppose you'll be finding out soon...
  
  You hear a crunching sound, as the zeta-wave transmitter is
  crushed. It seems you may not be getting paid this time around.
  
  > Go east
  The middle deck of the ship is a vast open space surrounded glass windows. I intended to use it for astronomical research; I'm sure Dashing has been using it as a ballroom, or something similarly ridiculous. Exits lead port and starboard, and there is a mahogany door fore. A gangway and staircase connect this deck with the ones above and below, respectively.
  
  I can see a klaxon here.
  
  What, can it be?! AMELIA DERRINGER, you vile leech! The time has come at last for you to DIE!
  
  Aaargh, my eyes! You think you're a pugilist, eh? Well, have a taste of my ATOMIC death ray!
  
  Oh no! It's gone critical! It's going to blow! No! Get off me! I need to vent the---
  
  You hear an explosion, followed by static. It seems you may not be getting paid this time around.
  
  > Line 1
  You switch back to Amelia on line 1.
  
  The beautiful open sky is around me here on the top deck of the ship. It's a pleasant setting; a high railing even protects me from most of the wind. The view is spoiled somewhat by a garish metal structure to the west, but there are smaller rooms to the north and east. A gangway leads down to the lower decks.
  
  Motionless robots litter the deck. Even deactivated, they're still imposing.
  
  I can also see a vacuum flask (which is closed) and an orange striped lever here.
  
  > unlock door with the lockpick
  Done. That sound you hear in the background, Owl, is an alarm going off. I trust you have something in mind; I'm not going to be useful as a sneak-thief if I can't sneak around.
  
  [Your zeta-wave transmitter system abruptly switches to line
  2.]
  What is that accursed noise? It must be the reactor alarm, but how could... No matter, time for ACTION! Just a moment, Owl, I'm going to run up to the main deck and take a look at the reactor.
  
  What the---AMELIA DERRINGER? Amelia, you shape-shifting sneak-thief! YOUR TIME HAS COME!
  
  Ow! Well, that didn't go as I expected. You've picked up some tricks in the Far East, have you? Well, I'll have you know, I'm on the line with the Owl, and so I'm sure I'll have a stratagem to dispatch you AT ANY MOMENT.
  
  Well, that's got her angry. Hey, what should I do here? She's pulled her jewelry off her neck and eaten it. Wait, was that ivory? This helmet may be ATOMIC, but it's not elephant-proof!
  
  You hear an impressive bout of crunching and screaming. After a moment, Amelia Derringer's voice comes over line 2.
  
  Hello, Owl. Derringer here. It seems you've been playing me for a fool. You've just made yourself a mortal enemy, haven't you? And I do believe you've just heard an example of the sort of things my mortal enemies can expect to get. How well hidden are you, I wonder? I suppose you'll be finding out soon...
  
  You hear a crunching sound, as the zeta-wave transmitter is
  crushed. It seems you may not be getting paid this time around.
  
  > Line 2
  You switch back to Dirk on line 2.
  
  The middle deck of the ship is a vast open space surrounded glass windows. I intended to use it for astronomical research; I'm sure Dashing has been using it as a ballroom, or something similarly ridiculous. Exits lead port and starboard, and there is a mahogany door fore. A gangway and staircase connect this deck with the ones above and below, respectively.
  
  I can see a klaxon here.
  
  > Go north
  In designing the airship, I realized that in addition to numerous science laboratories, I would also need a command center from which to issue my nefarious directives. It has the standard amenities one would expect from a supervillain's lair: a long table surrounded by plush leather chairs, a trapdoor cunningly concealed in the floor, a secret compartment full of SECRETS, and a model of the Earth. A mahogany door leads aft.
  
  > lock door with the lockpick
  All right, I've locked the austere mahogany door.
  
  > Ascend
  The beautiful open sky is around me here on the top deck of the ship. It's a pleasant setting; a high railing even protects me from most of the wind. The view is spoiled somewhat by a garish metal structure to the west, but there are smaller rooms to the north and east. A gangway leads down to the lower decks.
  
  Motionless robots litter the deck. Even deactivated, they're still imposing.
  
  I can also see a vacuum flask (which is closed) and an orange striped lever here.
  
  > unlock the door with the lockpick
  Done. That sound you hear in the background, Owl, is an alarm going off. I trust you have something in mind; I'm not going to be useful as a sneak-thief if I can't sneak around.
  
  [Your zeta-wave transmitter system abruptly switches to line
  2.]
  What is that accursed noise? It must be the reactor alarm, but how could... No matter, time for ACTION! Just a moment, Owl, I'm going to run up to the main deck and take a look at the reactor. Wait, the door is locked? Bah, a mere locked door can't stop the mighty DIRK RADON! To the main deck!
  
  What the---AMELIA DERRINGER? Amelia, you shape-shifting sneak-thief! YOUR TIME HAS COME!
  
  Ow! Well, that didn't go as I expected. You've picked up some tricks in the Far East, have you? Well, I'll have you know, I'm on the line with the Owl, and so I'm sure I'll have a stratagem to dispatch you AT ANY MOMENT.
  
  Well, that's got her angry. Hey, what should I do here? She's pulled her jewelry off her neck and eaten it. Wait, was that ivory? This helmet may be ATOMIC, but it's not elephant-proof!
  
  You hear an impressive bout of crunching and screaming. After a moment, Amelia Derringer's voice comes over line 2.
  
  Hello, Owl. Derringer here. It seems you've been playing me for a fool. You've just made yourself a mortal enemy, haven't you? And I do believe you've just heard an example of the sort of things my mortal enemies can expect to get. How well hidden are you, I wonder? I suppose you'll be finding out soon...
  
  You hear a crunching sound, as the zeta-wave transmitter is
  crushed. It seems you may not be getting paid this time around.
  
  > eat the ivory
  While having the strength of an elephant would be advantageous, I would prefer to rely on my considerable charm and wit for now. I'm saving the cameo as a last resort. Besides, the cameo itself is invaluable as a memento of my grandmother and quite valuable as a piece of jewelry.
  
  > Inventory
  I've got the zeta-transmitter your man gave me, concealed in a cameo I'm wearing around my neck. I'm also carrying:
  a harpoon
  a paper fan
  a scarf
  an aquamarine punch card
  an access card
  a set of lockpicks
  a black bag (which is open but empty)
  a gecko tail
  
  > look at button
  It's a big red button. Given its prominence and the glass box, it's presumably important.
  
  > Examine box
  A glass box, currently closed, with a big red button inside it.
  
  > Go south
  (first opening the austere mahogany door)
  It appears to be locked.
  
  > Line 1
  You switch back to Amelia on line 1.
  
  This room is garishly appointed with the hunting trophies Dashing must have scavenged throughout the world: hulking bears and moose from the Americas, lions from Africa, elephants from the Orient, and a menagerie of creatures even I barely recognize. While I obviously don't approve of his vicious little hobby, I have to admit that he at least has a healthy respect for nature.
  
  Exits lead north, west, and east (the last being through a heavy metal door), and a spiral staircase elegantly winds upward.
  
  I can see a green book and a display case (which contains a mace and a cudgel) here.
  
  > Go upwards
  This deck provides a spectacular panoramic view of the open sky. It would be enjoyable to watch the fluffy clouds darting past if I weren't on an important mission. Exits lead in east and west, and there is a mahogany door to the north. An ornate staircase leads down, and a more utilitarian gangway leads upward.
  
  I can see a set of lockpicks and a klaxon here.
  
  > unlock door
  What do you want to unlock the austere mahogany door with?
  
  > go to the south
  (first opening the austere mahogany door)
  
  The middle deck of the ship is a vast open space surrounded glass windows. I intended to use it for astronomical research; I'm sure Dashing has been using it as a ballroom, or something similarly ridiculous. Exits lead port and starboard, and there is a mahogany door fore. A gangway and staircase connect this deck with the ones above and below, respectively.
  
  I can see a set of lockpicks and a klaxon here.
  
  > look at the lockpicks
  Hmm, I'm not sure what to make of them. Thievery is, after all, beneath my dignity as a brilliant scientist and infamous supervillain.
  
  > get them
  The clouds are far away.
  
  > Go upwards
  I'm on the main deck of my ship---MY ship, not Dashing's. The deck is made of the finest, technologically advanced materials, and a tall railing runs around its perimeter. There is the reassuring sight of an ATOMIC REACTOR to port, and there are also smaller rooms fore and starboard. A gangway leads belowdecks.
  
  My deactivated robots are stationed around the deck.
  
  I can also see a vacuum flask (which is closed) and an orange striped lever here.
  
  > unlock the door with the lockpicks
  Like a common criminal? No, I'm a SCIENTIST.
  
  > Line 2
  You switch back to Dirk on line 2.
  
  I'm on the main deck of my ship---MY ship, not Dashing's. The deck is made of the finest, technologically advanced materials, and a tall railing runs around its perimeter. There is the reassuring sight of an ATOMIC REACTOR to port, and there are also smaller rooms fore and starboard. A gangway leads belowdecks.
  
  My deactivated robots are stationed around the deck.
  
  I can also see a vacuum flask (which is closed) and an orange striped lever here.
  
  > go north
  I'm in the robot command area of the ship, its innermost cortex from which Dashing directs MY automata. Pfaugh! The lout! The electromechanical computation engine seems to be in recent repair, fortunately. Ah, and there's the bookshelf, where the technical manuals and programmer's notes are meant to be stored. The aft exit leads back to the main deck.
  
  The light bulbs around the computation engine are dim, and the protective glass box attached to the engine sits defenselessly open.
  
  I can also see a silver punch card here.
  
  > put the silver in the slot
  I'll have to be holding the silver punch card before I can put it into something else.
  
  > put the silver in the slot
  I hear the sound of robots stomping belowdecks, followed a few moment laters by the sound of robots stomping back abovedecks.
  
  > Inventory
  I have your zeta-transmitter and my trusty laser gun. I'm also carrying:
  a set of lockpicks
  an atomic helmet (being worn)
  a jetpack (being worn)
  
  > Go south
  I'm on the main deck of my ship---MY ship, not Dashing's. The deck is made of the finest, technologically advanced materials, and a tall railing runs around its perimeter. There is the reassuring sight of an ATOMIC REACTOR to port, and there are also smaller rooms fore and starboard. A gangway leads belowdecks.
  
  My robots are practicing their motion subroutines, which unfortunately takes the form of executing dance motions. It's undignified, but at least it prevents them from bothering me.
  
  I can also see a vacuum flask (which is closed) and an orange striped lever here.
  
  > Line 2
  You switch back to Dirk on line 2.
  
  In designing the airship, I realized that in addition to numerous science laboratories, I would also need a command center from which to issue my nefarious directives. It has the standard amenities one would expect from a supervillain's lair: a long table surrounded by plush leather chairs, a trapdoor cunningly concealed in the floor, a secret compartment full of SECRETS, and a model of the Earth. A mahogany door leads aft.
  
  I can see a vacuum flask (which is closed) here.
  
  > put the flask in the trapdoor
  I'll have to be holding the vacuum flask before I can put it into something else.
  
  > take the flask
  The vacuum flask is too heavy to lift, but it's on casters; I could push it.
  
  > Go south
  I can see a klaxon here.
  
  > go upwards
  My deactivated robots are stationed around the deck.
  
  I can also see an orange striped lever here.
  
  > Go east