text: [Themes: horror, war, socially important, humor, horror, true story, post-apocalyptic, dystopia]
  
  You are sitting in your bunker, down to your last can of food. It's beets. You think to yourself how disgusting you would have found them a few months ago, but now they could almost be called a delicacy. You wonder if you should eat them now or wait a day or two. After all, who knows when you will find more food again.
  
  How did this even happen again? You think, your mind fuzzy from hunger.
  
  Oh, that's right. It was the elections.... But, who... who did you vote for again?
  
  [Author's Note: A take on what is to come]
  
  > Hillary Clinton
  That's right. Hillary lost and so did you. Your fellow Americans voted for Donald Trump.
  
  Of course, it wasn't bad at first. Sure, your racist uncle started saying the n-word a bit more often, but he was harmless. The first few weeks with Trump passed just fine until....
  
  > He pushed the button
  Yes, Korea pissed him off this time... Or was it Cuba? After Castro plopped over, he said we wouldn't work with Cuba. That didn't set well with Raul. Maybe Putin finally said something that didn't set so well with the Donald.
  
  You can't remember anymore. You're hungry, besides you hated watching the news.
  
  All you can remember is he hit the button, and they hit back. First, it was Charleston to get hit. Why there, you always asked yourself. Probably just because it was close to the border and small enough to attack. Then they hit the bigger cities. New York. LA. DC. Chicago managed to survive nuclear attacks. So did Texas, where you lived, but by then there were riots. You remember everyone trying to flee to Mexico, but Trump ordered a police force to keep anyone from crossing either way. He said leaving was treason to the country, and a war was started. You...
  
  > Were drafted
  Texas needed you to serve at the Wall to keep America strong against the "traitors." You suppose you were luckier than the other SOB's who got shipped off to who knows where.
  
  Life at the wall was pretty good, especially cause no one really believed in America anymore. What was left? You'd let family after family sneak to the other side, but for a price. The standard rations weren't cutting it, so you'd barter their trip across for whatever they had. The Great Ferryman, they used to call you! And how fitting considering many of them were leaving to just another hell.
  
  Mexico was all but destroyed at the start by the start of the war. Trump bullied them to build the war. They refused. He pushed again to get what he wanted, cutting off all trade and ties. He won. They were fleeing to hell from hell and if they wanted to leave, they could...
  
  > go to Hell.
  And when they fleed that hell, the next move was to run to...
  
  > Another hell.
  ...which, unfortunately, is where you were assigned to. And this was the worst hell of all: Wisconsin. You'd been found out by your supervisor and promoted in the name of your country. It was one thing to lose the business a family brings to a country. It was a far greater profit to charge them to leave. And you were good at it. In the name of your country, you were required to smuggle people out of the border. Besides, Canada was a far more lucrative venture than Mexico. It was still intact. Your job was to generate income for the country, but with a catch: any individuals coming over would be caught by a special ops team hiding just on the border. There was no penalty or punishment; rather, they were simply returned with a, "Better luck next time." Gotta keep that cash flow up.
  
  You weren't thrilled with the idea. It meant a cut in your profits, but at least you could live well without the ever-looming threat of death peering over you.
  
  By then, there was another wall. You were stationed with a guy named Frank who couldn't love the Packers more. The official signature of the Wisconsin Wall Force was a cheesehat, and you were made to wear. Who cares if the Packers won the Superbowl four times? You thought.They don't exist anymore Frank! After three weeks of listening to him, you'd had enough. You...
  
  > Requested to go back to Texas where you wouldn't have to freeze your balls of in a foam cheesehat.
  Your request was denied. You were simply too good at your job, they said.
  
  So you got bad.
  
  Real bad
  
  Steve-Urkel-Did-I-Do-That-Bad?
  
  Not only did you encourage families not to cross the border, you told them how great America was to everywhere else. Why, a few cities still had running water! And, in a couple of those, it was clean! Those families that did pass through other guards you made sure made it across. Soon, the US was back to losing money!
  
  The verdict was in: you were being promoted!
  
  In the past few weeks, the US began to topple because of overpopulation in cities. It needed to thin out, and what better way than to push it on Canada?
  
  You...
  
  > continue working with Packers' connoisseur Frank.
  You couldn't take it anymore. One night, you pushed him off the wall.
  
  It's not like it hurt him. He landed face first in 10 feet of snow. And you convinced him, after getting him mildly drunk, if his superiors found him, they'd think he was trying to escape. So he did. Funny how the most annoying man became the only person to make it into Canada.
  
  Two easy months passed and so did the president at the end of those. He'd been shot by...
  
  > The Clintons
  It was Hillary herself who got fed up and pulled the trigger. You were surprised it took so long, to be honest. Looking back, it was ironic the last day of Trump was the last day of the USA. You used to like him before this and thought he would "drain the swamp." That man drained Lake Superior (quite literally).
  
  The US fell into disarray. One political leader dead after the next. This was two years in at this point. You didn't know what to do. Life had descended into pure anarchy when all of a sudden,
  
  > Canadians stormed the wall on a herd of moose.
  You'd never heard anything from the other side of the Canadian border. Secretly, they had been raising a militia since the beginning of the end days. Part of this involved domesticating the moose. How they managed to do it in a such a short time let alone figure out how to let them be ridden is still a mystery, but there they were. The cold winters had ravaged Canada, and they began to run out of food. You figure, as the US was the cause of all of with, they thought raiding America wasn't the most immoral of cases.
  
  All of it was strangely surreal. Here they were marching to the wall, and you stood like Jon Snow in an episode of Game of Thrones. A bugle sounded in the background: an ambush warning. You recognized it from your time in Mexico, when at least the thought of invasion was possible.
  
  You don't have much time to think. What do you do?
  
  > Run
  You book it, but a couple of other guards have already jumped ship as well. They were shot by a sentry. No way that's going to be you. Okay, a quick fight then you run, but how do you deal with the guard?
  
  > return fire
  You shoot at her but she has the high ground and protection you don't. She shoots you in the head before you can manage your second shot.