text: > Look around
  You are in a small side room. The exits all lead back to the main gallery.
  A pirate captain confronts you, waving a cutlass.
  
  > give ring to the pirate
  The PIRATE gives a quick glance at the RING, then tosses it back.
  
  > give trumpet to the pirate
  The PIRATE gives a quick glance at the TRUMPET, then tosses it back.
  
  > kill the pirate
  You attack the pirate with your bare hands, but he evades your attack.
  
  > Go southeast
  You are in a small side room. The exits all lead back to the main gallery.
  A witch turns from her cauldron and raises her gnarled hands ominously.
  
  > hit witch with KNIFE
  You strike at the witch with the knife, but your weapon bounces off of her harmlessly
  
  > give the ring to the witch
  The WITCH gives a quick glance at the RING, then tosses it back.
  
  > give the makeup to the witch
  The WITCH gives a quick glance at the MAKEUP, then tosses it back.
  
  > give the trumpet to the witch
  The WITCH gives a quick glance at the TRUMPET, then tosses it back.
  
  > kill the witch
  You attack the witch with your bare hands, but she evades your attack.
  
  > examine cauldron
  You pass out from the pressure of waiting for the inevitable attack. You come to in the main gallery as the zookeeper snorts. "Must be goin' soft in my old age. But watch out for the Avocado, I ain't goin' near it to grab you out!"
  
  You have come to a central gallery opening onto eight small rooms.
  You hear strange yells, mumbles, cackles, screams and mad ravings coming from the rooms.
  An old woman dressed in a zoo keeper's uniform looks up at you.
  
  > Go southeast
  You are in a small side room. The exits all lead back to the main gallery.
  A very sharp knife is lying there, blade upwards.
  A witch turns from her cauldron and raises her gnarled hands ominously.
  
  > take KNIFE
  You pick up the sharp knife.
  
  > look at cauldron
  Probably just the kind of old crone who would go around turning people into frogs (or toads). She looks you over approvingly and starts gesturing and muttering an incantation. You feel your eyes starting to bulge
  
  > give the HOTDOG to the witch
  The WITCH gives a quick glance at the HOTDOG, then tosses it back.
  
  > Drink cauldron
  Either you are very hungry or very, very sick.
  
  > go southeast
  You pass out from the pressure of waiting for the inevitable attack. You come to in the main gallery as the zookeeper snorts. "Must be goin' soft in my old age. But watch out for the Avocado, I ain't goin' near it to grab you out!"
  
  You have come to a central gallery opening onto eight small rooms.
  You hear strange yells, mumbles, cackles, screams and mad ravings coming from the rooms.
  An old woman dressed in a zoo keeper's uniform looks up at you.
  
  > examine KNIFE
  "Eight rooms to choose from. Most actors I know can't count that high."
  
  It is a large bread knife with a serrated blade.
  
  > Go southwest
  You are in a small side room. The exits all lead back to the main gallery.
  You come face to face with the drama critic who panned your last
  three shows.
  
  > examine the critic
  This is the guy you always suspected was out to get you. Now you are sure of it. He grins maniacally and comes at you with poison pen raised.
  
  > give paper fortune to the critic
  "YOUR FORTUNE MAY RIDE ON YOUR WEIGHT." Must be for some sumo wrestler.
  
  > give the ring to the critic
  You can't read the ring, so instead you just examine it. A simple yet tasteful setting - a single, faceted stone in a 4 prong base.
  
  > give the makeup to the critic
  "Freddie Krueger Special Halloween Assortment"
  
  > give the trumpet to the critic
  You can't read the trumpet, so instead you just examine it. The trumpet is in amazingly good condition. By the style, you decide it was probably made over 3,000 years ago and used by ancient armies as they sieged and attacked walled cities. You always were such a good music historian.
  
  > kill the critic
  You attack the critic with your bare hands, but he evades your attack.
  
  > put the ring on critic
  You pass out from the pressure of waiting for the inevitable attack. You come to in the main gallery as the zookeeper snorts. "Must be goin' soft in my old age. But watch out for the Avocado, I ain't goin' near it to grab you out!"
  
  You have come to a central gallery opening onto eight small rooms.
  You hear strange yells, mumbles, cackles, screams and mad ravings coming from the rooms.
  An old woman dressed in a zoo keeper's uniform looks up at you.
  
  > examine KNIFE
  "Eight rooms to choose from. Most actors I know can't count that high."
  
  It is a large bread knife with a serrated blade.
  
  > examine ring
  A simple yet tasteful setting - a single, faceted stone in a 4 prong base.
  
  > Go southwest
  You are in a small side room. The exits all lead back to the main gallery.
  You come face to face with the drama critic who panned your last
  three shows.
  
  > hit the critic with KNIFE
  You strike at the critic with the knife, but your weapon bounces off of him harmlessly
  
  > Grease critic
  Don't know how to grease here...
  
  > take all
  You pick up the sharp knife.
  
  > check your inventory
  You're carrying:
  dim bulb (Providing light)
  long hotdog
  stage makeup
  sharp knife
  old lamp (Providing light)
  oaken bucket
  scuba suit
  fortune cookie
  paper fortune
  sturdy plank
  valve trumpet
  You're wearing:
  solitaire ring
  
  > Kick critic
  You pass out from the pressure of waiting for the inevitable attack. You come to in the main gallery as the zookeeper snorts. "Must be goin' soft in my old age. But watch out for the Avocado, I ain't goin' near it to grab you out!"
  
  You have come to a central gallery opening onto eight small rooms.
  You hear strange yells, mumbles, cackles, screams and mad ravings coming from the rooms.
  An old woman dressed in a zoo keeper's uniform looks up at you.
  
  > go to the northwest
  You are in a small side room. The exits all lead back to the main gallery.
  Oh, great, now you find Helen Hipclicks, the worlds most conceited actress.
  
  > hit Helen with KNIFE
  You strike at the helen with the knife, but your weapon bounces off of her harmlessly
  
  > give RING to HELEN
  The HELEN gives a quick glance at the RING, then tosses it back.
  
  > give the makeup to HELEN
  The HELEN gives a quick glance at the MAKEUP, then tosses it back.
  
  > give the trumpet to HELEN
  The HELEN gives a quick glance at the TRUMPET, then tosses it back.
  
  > kill HELEN
  You attack the helen with your bare hands, but she evades your attack.
  
  > Kiss helen
  You pass out from the pressure of waiting for the inevitable attack. You come to in the main gallery as the zookeeper snorts. "Must be goin' soft in my old age. But watch out for the Avocado, I ain't goin' near it to grab you out!"
  
  You have come to a central gallery opening onto eight small rooms.
  You hear strange yells, mumbles, cackles, screams and mad ravings coming from the rooms.
  An old woman dressed in a zoo keeper's uniform looks up at you.
  
  > Go northwest
  You are in a small side room. The exits all lead back to the main gallery.
  A very sharp knife is lying there, blade upwards.
  Oh, great, now you find Helen Hipclicks, the worlds most conceited actress.
  
  > take KNIFE
  You pick up the sharp knife.
  
  > look at the scrapbook
  This is the prima donna who's edged you out of more good parts than you care to think about. Now she's coming right at you waving her scrapbook. Either she's going to bore you to death with her clippings, or she means to attack you.
  
  > read the scrapbook
  Er, READ the SCRAPBOOK? I presume that was just an error in judgement.
  
  > give the paper fortune to HELEN
  The HELEN gives a quick glance at the FORTUNE, then tosses it back.
  
  > kick helen
  Don't know how to kick here...
  
  > read the clippings
  You pass out from the pressure of waiting for the inevitable attack. You come to in the main gallery as the zookeeper snorts. "Must be goin' soft in my old age. But watch out for the Avocado, I ain't goin' near it to grab you out!"
  
  You have come to a central gallery opening onto eight small rooms.
  You hear strange yells, mumbles, cackles, screams and mad ravings coming from the rooms.
  An old woman dressed in a zoo keeper's uniform looks up at you.
  
  > tell the woman about the packrat
  "Had a friend went in there once. Ain't got many friends these days."
  
  > Go upwards
  You've reached the roof over the wings. The hot sun makes you neck prickly. You see the top of an air shaft with a ladder leading down. There is a double-hung casement window in the wall to the West.
  
  > Go east
  This is NOT the Enterprise. You'll have to open these doors yourself.
  
  > open the doors
  You manage to pry the doors open, breaking only one fingernail in the process.
  
  > go to the east
  As you walk through, the doors slide closed behind you.
  
  > go west
  This is NOT the Enterprise. You'll have to open these doors yourself.