text: [Themes: sci-fi, dystopia, humor]
  
  [Author's Note: Planet Mopper sequel, it is advisable to read the first volume, but it is not necessary. Guybrush MacPorridge now enjoys the joys of being a God with his own planet. But when the Gods of the Empire forced him to undergo a series of tests to acquire his official Imperial God license. His entire world will once again be engulfed in chaos. -Three possible messiahs recruits. A clue, sometimes you have to know how to re-touch the tapestry of life. Special thanks to Cys discord and especially to Corgi and MHD who drew me incredible art with the Necromancer eating buffalo wings.]
  
  > The interview
  Two months after your illegal ascension to Godhood
  
  "You are, so interesting, Gaybrush. Thank you very much for accepting this interview in such a short time. "
  
  It's Guybrush. But thank you, beautiful lady," you look around, trying to pretend that you don't notice how artificial intelligence shakes its attributes like maracas at a Latin music festival.
  
  If someone told you, just a few months ago, that you would end up being a god with your own planet, you would have called him a drunk while you wearily cleaning the space stadium in which heroes fight and die to become what you are now.
  
  "Now I will begin the interview seriously his Goddess, Remember to offer the Angle of poor nobody and how grateful you are to the empire."
  
  Her voice and entire ghostly presence change as the runes floating like spectral tentacles increasing the sensory effect on the spectators. "Welcome to the new holographic augmented reality experience, I am the program hostess, The fool. In the name of Immortals entertainment, we usually play with the lives of inferior mortal aliens. Where the player decisions will determine his life and his access to eternity; but this time we have, Guybrush, the trash-class redneck, Janitor, who, thanks to an undeserved pirouette of fate, has become a god without deserving it in the imperial society?"
  
  "Hey, I'm still getting used to my standard of living change. For example, I was so poor that I did not have access to The virtual environment of this new quantum virtual reality program. It is like floating in the middle of the Galaxy. And natural food is the best compared to eating recycled corpses!"
  
  The beautiful flashing neon figure takes the floor again with her velvety voice, "Wow, you are really green, Don't you?"
  
  You look at her, without really knowing how to act about all of her crap comments.
  
  > keep the interview going.
  "Life was so different that I can't explain it now. Every day is something new and different, something to learn, the taste of new food, feel the land that I myself have created, see its inhabitants develop and look at me with pride. This sounds very idiotic and cheesy, right? " you ask while shaking your hair shaping it with your hands while your eyes the virtual gaze of your digital interviewer
  
  The fool blasts, "absolutely not! You have had the great fortune of being awarded a real-life, now you must embrace totally your new god status. However, it is up to you choose how to show your persona in the best multidimensional reality. show. Will you be the action paladin of light god or the seductive villain destined to making people fall to their dark side? That is your choice. Both sides sell well. "
  
  A metallic voice fills your mind and your voice with a disturbing metallic taste and smell.
  
  We go live on 5, 4, 3, 2, 1 ...
  
  The fool transforms herself into a radiant and charming figure, presenting the event live. Your stomach rumble, who knows how many might beings situated in diverse universes and dimensions. All pending of your responses.
  "Welcome immortals of the multiple multiverses, We have compiled the most important questions in the last Holo survey to interview our first unofficial and unlicensed hero First question, What is your name? and what are your powers?"
  
  "An easy question, I am Guybrush Macporridge, I was born with the power to create cleansing objects and washing products at will. I failed the exam to be a medium-class citizen and during a decade I using my magic powers to cleaning the famous bloody arena where the heroes fight to the death to become gods." You say trying to maintain that aura of a mysterious underdog, you know that advertising is the only thing that will allow you to keep your status.
  
  Your virtual interviewer takes advantage of that, addressing the billions upon billions of avid citizens of the empire for entertainment, "Dear fans, it seems our mysterious underdog is hiding us how he achieves reach his godhood."
  
  "If I'm honest, I don't know what can I say, a scientific base I was working on exploding and during my recovery, the Gods discovered my latent power. Now, my training is starting to be a proud member of the Empire." You continue repeating like a trained monkey what the Empire want to hear. If only, you could tell the truth. You close your clenched fists, trying to hide your true feelings behind an armour of nervousness.
  
  > Your mind gets lost, rememebering the lab, and her...
  Heavy hands press the release button of your helmet, freeing you. An overwhelming white light blinds your eyes accustomed to the darkness for an entire hour, and you are definitely in a high-tech laboratory. But for now, your main concern is her.
  
  In front of you, there is a cyborg woman dressed in an immaculate white translucent lab jumpsuit that leaves little to the imagination, and nightmares. The woman could be better described as a piece of rancid lard with legs with titanium legs to help her carry her extended belly, while her flaccid breasts remind you of fallen deflated bags of water. A slug with a human form, you doubt that someone could dare to find something like that attractive.
  
  She sees your gaze and begins to touch her entire body trying to look provocative, while you try to control your desire to vomit before such a display of her revealing the pustules, body hair and fat covering the human flesh of her cyborg body.
  
  "You are a very special creature and probably the only person in the Divine mega station that can understand my situation." Her voice is now warmer and passionate. Now if you have questions, you will not have opportunities later... She smiles evilly, looking at you with desire in her strange eyes.
  In front of you a portal black and brilliant moving like if it were made by water... AS you fall, you can feel its energy calling you to fulfil your destiny.
  
  You wake up lost and stunned Without a doubt, the fat woman has made you cross the portal unconscious.
  
  Everything around you disappears into an intangible nothingness, you simply float in a strange chasm, waddled by some kind of flickering energy, it is nothing a mortal can explain. Time is somehow nonexistent here, but you run restless, as you feel like you have to do something, or being consumed by the void.
  
  Do I have to do something? Why does nothing happen? Will I be one of the failures that are unable to become Gods? All these feelings bite your consciousness until the mere fact of thinking is a nightmare.
  
  The murderbowl is the most refined system that the Empire has created to refine the best candidates to fight to become gods. But even so, sometimes there are failures. In which violent supernovae occur at the limit of the Galaxy. Other heroes appear changed, transformed into monsters that are a mere parody of their previous power.
  
  "I may be another failure... But, something inside me tries to light up and screams to do something. Do something? Being a god cannot be as easy as snapping my fingers and seeing how an authentic beer appears on my hand." You mutter to yourself
  
  "WTF!" You can't avoid screaming even though the lack of air makes it impossible for any sound to be heard, but in your left hand, there is a beautiful and cold bottle of beer like those that you remember that your father drank when you were a small child before you You were considered undesirable, and the future for you was bright and heroic, full of great food and beer in your hand, several slaves and a big family.
  
  You open the bottle and taste it with your mind lost in your past. The family, you lost forever. A father, a mother a good house on the mother planet with vineyards and a good flat in a good neighbourhood station in Divine.
  
  The bubbling golden liquid tastes bittersweet, to honey and a home, but it is also a memory of all that I have lost. Or what I can earn. If I become God, I can be what my own planet wants to have, and eventually create my own family.
  
  Suddenly, little by little, the darkness changes, like the dawn of your planet Reah, which fascinated you so much to see working outside the stadium; now there is a warm and beautiful yellow light like the yolk of fried eggs that your mother cooked for you as a child; you have created your star and you decide to call it Uxis, like the cat, you had as a child.
  
  "So you got it, do you really think that you are better than me? This can't be happening!" You can listen to the stinky fat woman; but thank God, you can't see her. You don't even know how you can hear her voice in your head.
  
  > ***
  "Cut, the interview! Are you okay? Your stress is through the roof. For now, this is enough, Guybrush."
  
  The connection is broken, but the magic continues to surround you like an unhealthy gas. You sit down with an authentic dwarf beer as you gaze out the window of your sumptuous palace, hundreds of slaves and tourists milling around the luxurious facilities of the city under your full control. Your people, your planet. Your power..."
  
  "Sir, Corgi is here! The empire has decided what to do with you." The mechanical maid leaves with elaborate courtesy.
  
  > The message from the Gods
  Even the marble statues in your main hall plug their ears in shock at the young nobleman sweating near your brand new throne.
  
  "Are you sure about this Corgi?!" you comment surprised the young aristocrat sweating after running around the palace
  "I came via teleportation from the capital when I found out about the decision of the Council of Gods. But I don't know what you are surprised about, Guybrush, it was clear that the Gods were not going to let you be, not after a Janitor transform into God... Damn, I don't even understand how you ended up deep in this shit. "
  
  You blink in disbelief until your eyes sting. You see your hands still showing calluses and discolourations caused by years of using thousands of chemicals polishing and cleaning every atom of the Arena where the heroes earn their promotion to the gods. It's only been a month since you created your first planet, saving your head out of a pure miracle.