Things
Jacqueline A. Lott
collaboration constrained writing cover art funny humor key-pooping creature parser Speed-IF >= 20 SpeedIF SpeedIF April 2004 TADS TADS 2 walkthrough
Enter
But the damn thing's locked.
You open the thing
Which thing do you mean, the locking / unlocking thing, the manual insulating things, the short vegetable thing, or yourself?
Locking
I don't know how to open the locking / unlocking thing.
You examine the structural thing
Within this wooden structural sheltering thing you know there to be essential things, including soft horizontal things to sleep upon, warming things and (most importantly) potable alcoholic things. Yet it is locked against you.

Around its lower structural thing, interesting short vegetable things grow.
You check your inventory
You have a locking / unlocking thing and manual insulating things.
Unlock thing with locking thing
Which thing do you mean, the locking / unlocking thing, the manual insulating things, the rustic wooden structural sheltering thing, the short vegetable thing, or yourself?
You look around
All around you, mountainous unimplemented things rise up into the lofty heavenly unimplemented thing. Beneath your pedal things, the well-worn linear pedestrian unimplemented thing descends into the lower geographically interstitial unimplemented thing. Nestled among the rocky unimplemented things, a notably implemented rustic wooden structural sheltering thing awaits. It looks promisingly warm.
You take the vegetable thing
You pluck a relatively small thing of the vegetable things. You now have a plucked herbal thing!
You examine hoary
A furry, cute yet dastardly sciuromorphic thing, which has lately swallowed your prized thing by which locked things are rendered unlocked (and vice versa). It is notably hoary.
You check your inventory
You have manual insulating things (being worn) and a plucked herbal thing.
You give the herbal thing to the hoary thing
You seize the hoary sciuromorphic thing and force the herbal things into its oral thing! You hold its struggling furry corporeal thing against your corporeal thing and stroke its tubular peristaltic thing until it swallows. As you release it, it viciously bites your manual thing! Ow!

The hoary sciuromorphic thing trills nauseously.
You examine hoary thing
A furry, cute yet dastardly sciuromorphic thing, which has lately swallowed your prized thing by which locked things are rendered unlocked (and vice versa). It is notably hoary.

The hoary sciuromorphic thing looks a little queasy.
You wait for a while
Time passes...

Eww! The hoary sciuromorphic thing violently defecates! Your locking / unlocking thing is returned, albeit somewhat icky!
You take the unlocking thing
You carefully retrieve the locking / unlocking thing, and thoughtfully wipe your manual insulating things on the hoary sciumorphic thing afterwards.
You unlock the shelter thing with unlocking thing
Once again you insert the locking / unlocking thing into the thing which was made to accept it, and carefully unlock it. The flat wooden thing sealing the thing by which you may enter swings aside, its articulated metal things creaking!
Enter
An emotionally satisfying thing swells in your metaphysical personal thing as you stride through the thing for entering or exiting the rustic structural thing. You light and stoke the heating thing, crack open a glass thing containing alcholic things, kick off your pedal insulating things, collapse onto the horizontal soft thing and rest.

After a relaxing slumbrous thing, you awake refreshed and warm, and continue merrily on your ambulatory thing through the mountainous things. Hooray, you win the interactive thing!
You eat the hoary thing
The hoary sciuromorphic thing doesn't appear appetizing.

The hoary sciuromorphic thing looks a little queasy.
You wait for a while
Time passes...

Eww! The hoary sciuromorphic thing violently defecates! Your locking / unlocking thing is returned, albeit somewhat icky!
You take the unlocking thing
Blech! You got hoary sciuromorphic thing exretatory thing all over your manual things! But at least you got your locking / unlocking thing back.
You enter
An emotionally satisfying thing swells in your metaphysical personal thing as you stride through the thing for entering or exiting the rustic structural thing. You light and stoke the heating thing, crack open a glass thing containing alcholic things, kick off your pedal insulating things, collapse onto the horizontal soft thing and rest.

Your osseous, somewhat stinky organic things are discovered many chronological things later. Infected sciuromorphic dentally piercing things work fast.