text: ABERDEEN HERALD. Pull 11 <*b fit Kirrr IhnrwlM. IBERDEEN WASH That piano trust will make music. When the doctors fall out, the bacilli give themselves over to catarrh. The newly formed starch trust expects to polish off all its rivals promptly. The oat that is said to have fallen sixty feet unhurt may have only eight lives left. In view of burglars entering all sorts of buildings, isn't it odd none of them get into the jails? Often a man who has eight or nine dollars thinks he has done all that is necessary to hand his name down to future generations. Andrew Carnegie says poverty is a blessing. It is quite a while since Andrew tried it, however, and he may have forgotten. After all, why should there not be combines among place-holders for their particular benefit? Is not public office in public trust? The Czar believes that universal disarmament will come, but he is willing to admit that present complications may delay it a little. In spite of the prevalence of newspapers and coroners' inquests, people are still turning on the gas and trying to blow out electric lights. As a rule of life, it is well not to depend too much on simply being square or upright to escape being played upon, look even at the pianos. Ultimately, the tilth gets out about men. Some are not so bad as they are painted, while others are intensely better than amateur photographers make them. If the Nebraska school. Colonel-teacher who whipped the entire class of boys single-handed does not become jealous later in life so that this story may be told about him he will go against all precedent. A valued exchange refers editorially to a man who had "to rise at a.m. in the morning." Still, his case was so bad. If he had been called upon to get up at.m. in the evening, he might well have grumbled. The other day, because he feared hydrophobia as a result of a dog bite. He called cases of rabies among human beings are largely the result of hydrophobia. Teas of thousands of people are bitten by dogs every year without serious effects. Thousands of readers feel a personal concern of loss on reading of the death of H.D. Blackmore, the author of the exquisite romance, "Lorua Doone," one of the books which have held people of all ages and degrees by its powerful charm and which is reasonably sure of retaining its fame into the next generation. A preacher has resigned because he wants the privilege of dancing when he feels like it, and to use his own words, "of occasionally slapping a friend on the back and saying, 'Hello, there, Hill.'" That poor fellow's parents ought to have known from the beginning that nature never intended him for the ministry. He was born to drive a coal wagon. Jay Gould died leaving his sons and daughters a fortune of $70,000,000. One daughter married a titled foreigner, Count Bonl de Castelaine, of France, and there was a grand wedding. But the titled foreigner was a disappointment. Before the honeymoon was over, he began to furnish sensations for the yellow newspapers of Paris and New York. The other daughter took a different view of life. She would not be a butterfly, but a bee. Following out her ideal, she has made the name of Helen Gould the sweetest name in America. Every working girl in New York idolizes her and there is scarce an American soldier or sailor who would not die for her. Which of these two, think you, chose wisely? About ten years ago, a young widow with three children went to New York seeking employment. The eldest child, a boy of the family, had been before the mast, and his boyish boast of the different knots he could be inspired an inventive woman to order of him a screen of tied rope. The effect was so odd and beautiful that a paying industry in repartee resulted. By the combined efforts of the family, one daughter has been enabled to study art in Paris, the other has lately graduated from Cornell, and the boy is a civil engineer of much promise in the government service. "My resources are what we ourselves can do," said Frederick the Giant to his discouraged generals. The dictum is no less applicable to each inquirer today. There are a few people still convinced that the twentieth century has begun, and there are others who are linking between two opinions concerning the matter. Most of the accepted authorities of the world agree that the twentieth century will not begin until Jan. 1, 1901, and this will be the accepted decision the world over of this much disputed question. It is evident or at least it seems that anyone ought to consider it evident that the nineteenth century will end after the twentieth century has been completed, or at midnight of Dec. 31, 1900. This being the case, the new century will be ushered in at the first moment of time of Jan. 1, 1901. It is curious that such a simple problem should have proved so vexatious, but it illustrates how easily a quibble may be made to appear logical. Those who are convinced that this is the first year of the twentieth century will doubtless continue to hold that notion until public opinion has become so settled that to go opposite to it will result in ridicule. That will end the debate. News that Great Britain may be to fall back upon a supply of dumdum bullets for use in South Africa causes a shock to our conventional sentiments about what is called "civilized war," says the Chicago Journal. And yet, both combatants used the dumdum, but it might hasten the final result, without being inconsistent with their general intentions toward each other. War is no longer waged naturally and honestly and on its merits. We have it relished and conventionalized in a ludicrous attempt to disguise its real character and minimize its necessary horrors. The immediate object of the soldier in battle is the swift death of the other fellow. The ultimate object of the government is to punish the enemy nation until it quits. Disguise it as we will. It is organized manslaughter. If we were natural and honest about it, we should proceed toward that end by doing all the damage to the enemy we could in as many different ways as we could, but ambassadors and envoys have got together like secrets before a duel and agreed that we must be polite and make our mutual hate look pleasant while it is having its picture taken. So we dress up its horrors in attractive garments and agree to use weapons of relatively small efficiency and great tardiness of execution. We may kill the enemy, but we must kill him politely. We cannot shoot him with all exploding title ball because that kills him too rudely and shocks his nervous system too much - as if, when nations went to war, they were not like ravening beasts, drunk with the lust of blood. We cannot adopt any means at our disposal. We can kill a man with a jagged, sharp-edged piece of shell, but mustn't shoot with old nails and broken glass. It is permissible to sweep down whole companies at once with the fan tire of an automatic gun, but we mustn't dispose of our foes by introducing even the gentlest sedatives into his water supply. These things are ridiculously inconsistent with the purposes of war. It is like saying it is laudable to shoot a man through his lungs, but unfair to shoot him through the liver. It is superfluous to hit a big antagonist. The duel that the latter should mark on his person the outline of a man of avenge size, and any shot that struck him outside the mark shouldn't count. Would it not be more consistent if a nation used against an invading enemy, for example, all the resources and ingenuity at its command? THE ORIGINAL SPEECH. True Praise to the Editor of Mun Unlike Any other Writer. The original speech, the true primitive tongue of man, was quite unlike any language we have ever heard; yet we have all talked it and all its elements are present in the tongues of today, says the Contemporary. The primitive language was a vowel language altogether; it had no consonants, or contacts, as we ought to call them, at all. Its words consisted of vowel sounds following each other, repeated  our exclamations, each of which indicates a single emotion, tend to remain pure vowel sounds even at the present day. A Social Dip of Tan you trace the resemblance of a baby to anything under the sun but another baby?" "Oh, yes, indeed," replied the social diplomat. "To what?" "To whichever parent asks me about it." All the masters of diplomacy are not in public life.—Detroit Journal. The feminine Conception. Lawyer—Write that wholesale firm in New York which sent us a claim against the Jeweler that he's attached by his wife's sister. "stenographer—Excuse me, sir, but shouldn't the preposition be to instead of by V—Jewelers' Weekly." The chief valued at $930,000. It took several men to have a better woman more than 20 years, to which it wasn't until a poor husband. EVENTS OF THE DAY Epitome of the Telegraphic News of the World. TERSE TICKS FROM THE WIRES All Interesting Collection of Items From the Two Richmond Precedents Condensed Form The revolution in Venezuela, under the leadership of Hernandez, is said to be gaining headway. The treasurer of Nez Perce county, Idaho, was arrested for depositing public funds in national banks. Two hundred shareholders of the Panama Canal Company met in Paris and chose a new board of directors. A bill appropriating $150,000 for the enlargement of the post office building at Portland, Dr., was passed in the senate. After an overhauling at Mare Island navy yard, the Philadelphia will proceed to the island of Tutuila. One of the Samoans. A branch of the mints' union has been formed at Cornucopia. This is noteworthy in that it is the first branch to be formed in Oregon. During the last three months, nearly 250 men have arrived in San Francisco from the Philippines, and it is said 200 more are on the way. The Corliss proposition for the government ownership of a Pacific cable was defeated by the house committee on interstate and foreign commerce, by a vote of 8 to 5. F. O. Tait, amateur golf champion of Great Britain in 1881 and 1882, was killed during General Mac Donald's reconnaissance at Koodersberg, being shot through the body. He had previously been wounded at Magerslown. The British ship County of Edinburgh went ashore near Manassau, leaving a ship on the Jersey coast, near Point Pleasant. She is hard and fast aground, and it is expected to break up. The crew were taken off in the breeches buoy by the life-savers. Iglisias and Eduardo Conde, Puerto Rican labor leaders, have issued an appeal to this government on behalf of the working men of Puerto Rico. They declare that the working class of the island have been reduced by reason of the war, the hurricane, and the action of this government since the storm, to a condition of extreme destitution. By an executive order, a certain portion of the peninsula in the district southern boundary, and embracing Camp Point Spencer, has been reserved for public purposes. The tract is located on the west shore of Port Clarence bay, comprising the peninsula on which Point Spencer, and includes about four square miles. Albay province is much harassed by the Filipino rebels. A territorial form of government is recommended for Hawaii. Dawson merchants are closing up shop to go to Cape Nome. Congressman Sulzer, of New York, is talked of for the government. Van's running mate. Fire in the Brooklyn navy yard destroyed property to the value of $100,000. Four men were fatally wounded during a riot at a dance in Northern Oklahoma. The strike of the Cuban cigarmakers has been settled. The effort was unsuccessful. Robbers made an unsuccessful attempt to hold up a Santa Fe train in Oklahoma. Elijah Cone, one of the oldest newspaper men of Wisconsin, was frozen to death in Fond du Lac. American miners are not allowed to carry arms or ammunition into the state of Sonora, Mexico. Chaplain Wells, just returned from the Philippines, says there is too much whiskey will and used there. The transport Siain, which lost all mules out of 100 on her trip to Manila, is back in San Francisco harbor. The city of Skagway protests against the appointment of a delegate to congress without the vote of the people. Ed. Armstrong, a Medford, Ore., bricklayer, was shot and fatally injured by A. J. Halleu, during a saloon row. Fire at the National Biscuit Company's works, at Worcester, Mass., destroyed property to the value of $600,000. The Kansas supreme court holds that railways cannot be compelled to furnish free transportation to livestock shippers. Butler's attack is now known to have been no feint, he was really defeated in a third attempt to reach Lady Smith. Thomas G. Merrill, of Salt Lake City, widely known throughout the West as an energetic worker in the silver cause, is dead. French railroads have ordered 30 locomotives from Philadelphia. A Leipzig newspaper warns German manufacturers to crowd them out of Russia. A French court sent a man to prison. For three months for insulting Queen Victoria in a pamphlet. The queen of Italy has a handkerchief. AUSTIN NEWS. Plague at Manila is spreading. Lord Roberts' forces have occupied Jacobsdal. Tern tie snow storms are raging in Northern Germany. The house passed the legislative, executive and judicial appropriation bill. General Kelley-Kenny's brigade captured a liquor supply train of 78 wagons near Lacobsdal. A blizzard is raging in New York. Finding clouds of snow are being whirled about by a strong northeast wind. An armor plate trust, composed of 15 firms in the world, which practically monopolize armor plate, will be formed. Will Hurts, a negro, was lynched near Haskett Mills, S.C., by a mob of 250 men. He assaulted the wife of a planter. Rear-Admiral Sampson has been offered and declined the presidency of the Massachusetts institute of technology. Three men were caught in a snow slide in Colorado, near Silverton. Two were killed and the third saved his life by running. The Abbott, Downing Carriage Company, of Concord, N.H., has made an assignment, with liabilities of $200,000 and assets of $600,000. The strike situation at the island of Martinique is now calm. Several arrests have been made of strikers for interfering with men at work. The body of Miss Esther Cullen, of Olympia, Wash., was found on the side flats of that city. A complete air of mystery surrounds her death. The Vermont State Federation of Women's Clubs is attempting to secure the appointment of women on the state board of penal and charitable institutions. A band of Creo Indians, camped near Putte, Mont., bought a quantity of alcohol, and by mistake... The wood alcohol, three of the band dying in great agony. The Owen brothers, two of the band, who held up and robbed a Wells Fargo express car at Fairbanks, Ariz., have been captured near Pearce, Ariz., by a Tombstone posse. Urates are causing much trouble in Chinese waters. A crew from a British guuboat had a lively fight with them near Chou Chow Chang, in which several pirates were killed and one sailor shot. At El Paso, Texas, a mob of negro soldiers from Fort Bliss attacked the city police station with the object of releasing two of their comrades who had been arrested and during the fight one officer and one soldier was killed. Fighting men. The army appropriation bill carries $11,700,000. Treaty between the United States and Trinidad has been signed. Charles Lewis, of Lewisville, Or., killed himself accidentally while hunting. Astoria, Or., is taking special precautions against the introduction of plague. The anti-trust conference has declared in favor of the government ownership of railroads. A press agent of the defunct Franklin syndicate believes that Miller made a million dollars out of the swindle. Manufacturing, railway and ice harvesting interests have been greatly damaged by severe storms in New England. Three well-known citizens of the town of Nanaimo, L.C., were drowned while on a hunting trip on Vancouver Island. The United States government has all new naval vessels under construction, which will require in officers alone, 2,000 men. Willis L. Sullivan, Mayor Phelan's secretary, was chosen by the board of police commissioners of San Francisco to be chief of police. Sam I'eswick, an old and well-known character on the Chicago Board of Trade, died. As a charity patient in the Baptist hospital of that city, Mexican papers are giving much attention to the proposed construction of the Nicaragua canal. They believe it will benefit Mexican trade. England is suffering from a severe blizzard. Trains are snowed up in all directions and street-car lines blocked and telegraph and telephone wires are down. The Salvation Army celebrated the 20th anniversary of its establishment in the United States with the baptizing of Booth Tneker's baby. The ceremony took place in New York. The Vladimir Yostock, one of the supply ships chartered by the government for the transportation of quartermaster's and commissary stores, arrived at San Francisco from Manila. Patriotic women of Vancouver, B.C., have deviled a means to aid the British soldiers in South Africa. Three thousand pairs of socks are ready for shipment, besides sweaters, caps, and handkerchiefs. Captain Charles Loeltier has been doorkeeper at the entrance of the executive chamber in Washington for over 510 years. The oldest consul of the United States in continuous service is Horatio J. Sprague, who became consul at Gibraltar in 1848. The persons engaged in raising funds to buy a home in Washington for Rear-Admiral Schley have made another appeal for money. CRONJE GOT AWAY Doubt About Capture of the British Wagons. HOW ROBERTS' PLANS WORKED Burr From Natal Are Reported to be Moving to Australia or His Free Stalls. London, Feb. 20.—It is now amply confirmed that General Cronje escaped. Every detail received, however, proves how admirable Lord Roberts' plans were. conceived and were succeeding. But for the unexpected delay at Dekiel, the first force would have been surrounded. The delay of one day there gave them their chance for a hasty retreat. All the other movements of Lord Roberts were executed on time. Apparently General Cronje is retreating with the main army, and even if he shall escape altogether, he will probably lose all his baggage. There is still something doubtful of about the capture of the British convoy. According to a Daily Mail correspondent with the convoy, which consisted of 200 wagons, each loaded with 6,000 pounds of ration and forage, and each drawn by 10 oxen, it was quite unexpectedly attacked by a command supposed to come from Colesburg. The escort, consisting of 80 of the Gordon Highlanders, 40 men of the army service corps, and a few of Kitchener's horse, maintained a defense until the arrival of reinforcements sustaining insignificant casualties. The Standard's correspondent at Jacobsdal, telegraphing February 17, says: "An attack was made yesterday upon the rear guard of our main body by a force of 1,400 Boers, who were hurried up from Colesburg. They succeeded in capturing some of our wagons, but Lord Roberts did not delay his march to retake these. There were few casualties on our side." The last of our supply columns arrived from Honey Nest kloof today, having met with no opposition on the way. Specials from Ladysmith report an apparent movement on the lines toward the Free State, presumably with the object of assisting General Cronje. Bombardment. City of Mexico, Feb. 20.—The president has issued a decree for the establishment of a system of bonded warehouses at ports of entry. Managers of warehouses may lend money on the goods deposited, as well as enjoy the usual privileges pertaining to this business in foreign countries, collect storage charges, etc. Exemptions of customs duties on the materials for the construction of the warehouses are granted for five years. Several banks here are interested in this business, and New York parties are expected to take a portion of the capital required. The business was projected some years ago, but was defeated in congress, but it is now certain to pass. Mexico City, Feb. 20.—A special to the Record from Monterey, Mex., says: An American syndicate with a capital of $10,000,000 will immediately begin the construction of a great steel plant in this city. The plans for the mammoth concern have been completed and the ground purchased for locating the several buildings. An abundance of high-grade iron ore and coal is within easy shipping distance. The plant will make a specialty of manufacturing steel rails, and will be the first industry of the kind to be established in Mexico. It will give employment to about 4,000 men in the different departments when they are in operation. Several American capitalists in Monterey are heavy stockholders in the enterprise. The Veitegii«*l>»ti llevoliitlon* Havana, Feb. 20.—General Ignacio Andrade, former president of Vene zuela, who is now in Havana, said today: "I left Venezuela for the good of my country, as it was claimed that I was the cause of the revolution. As the revolution continues, 1 can scarcely have been the sole cause. I confess that 1 do not know the precise cause of the war. liy some it has been at tributed to the division of the country into 20 states by congress. The revo lutionists pretend to consider it uncon stitutional, but they have themselves maintained that diivsiou." Kl«>|>li»iit* ltan Amuck. London, Feb. 20. —An exciting scene took place at the Crystal Palace, Syden ham, this afternoon. Two large ele phants belonging to the circus rau umiick, killed their keepers and gored another man. There was a terrible panic in the audience attending the concert in the place. One animal was captured after gieat damage to prop erty. The other escaped through the grounds, but was captured late this evening in the suburbs of Breckenham. Fire in Denver, Colo., destroyed a tour-story building. Loss is estimated at $150,000. Mrtrn Sturm Worth tHD.IIOO, Hurnvil. Clarksdule, Miss., Feb. 20.—Fire which started in the rear of Itacol & Capps' general store destroyed seven brick stores in the business portion of the city today; loss, $50,000. Cu|lr|« llnlrnyMl by firm. New Orleans, Feb. 20.—The St. CliArles college, at Grand Coteau, to gether with a large and valuable libra ry, was destroyed by tire today; loss, #50,000. BATTLE IN SOUDAN. FrrtK'li Fori')' I><-frnti-<l ISiilmili, n Nmlivr Clili'Ttiiln. Paris, Feb. 19. — M. de Crais, minister of the colonies, has received a telegram from the governor of the French Congo, M. Ho Laniothe, announcing the defeat in battle of Kabul, the principal chieftain of Central Sudan, by a French expedition under M. Gentil. Kabah has long been the strongest opponent of the extension of French influence in the Sudan. It appears that he was strongly entrenched at Kouna, between French Congo and Lake Tchad. Kouna was defended by 12,000 men, with 2,500 rifles and three cannon. After a desperate fight, the French demolished the fortress. 15,000 ball, who was wounded during the fight, fled six hours before its conclusion. The commander of the French expedition, however, admits that practically half of his own force was placed in his defense. Forty-three Senagalese sharpshooters were killed, and four Europeans, including Captain Robillard, and 100 Senagalese were wounded. The commander of the expedition says in his report: "We had altogether 820 rifles, so I thought it advisable to continue the march to Lake Tchad. Captain Robillard occupied a fortified cantonment at Tounia." The commander of the expedition returned to Haines to inform the governor of the defeat of Kabah. He reports that the result will be very important, as Kabali is completely demoralized by his losses, estimated at between 2,000 and 3,000. Yaqui prisoners. Hl* If inidrail of TI|«I11 Will H«' nutrlb- I 111 I'll Viirluim Cilli'M. Austin, Tex., Feb. 11. — A dispatch from Manzanillo, Mexico, says that the Mexican gunboat Unxaca has arrived there from the mouth of the El Paso river with 600 Yaqui Indian prisoners on board. They were captured in the battle fought about three weeks ago near Mazatlan. The prisoners will be taken to Guadalajara, and there distributed to the various interior cities. They will not be confined in prisons, but will be kept under surveillance for a few years, until they have become educated in the habits of the Mexican people when they will be allowed to return to their tribe and impart their newly acquired knowledge to their fellow tribesmen. When the El Paso left the Yaqui river, the government troops were making good progress toward subduing the rebels. General Torres had divided his command, and the two armies were to advance into the Yaqui country from two different points. No official confirmation is obtainable as to the government's loss in the recent battles, but it is reported that there were over 400 killed and wounded. It is also stated that the Yaquis left 300 killed, about 300 wounded and 600 captured. Huron's Expedition. Washington, Feb. 11. — Consideration of the financial matter having been concluded, discussion of the Philippine question was resumed in the senate today. McFenry, (Rep. La.), strongly opposed the permanent acquisition of the islands, and believed the United States ought to relinquish them as soon as the authority of this country had been asserted. Stewart, (Silver Nevada), took a pronounced position in favor of the admission of the products of any of the island possessions of the United States free of duty. The bill providing a form of government for the territory of Hawaii was read, but beyond that formality nothing was done with it. In Chicago, Feb. 10.—Five persons were injured, one fatally, in four fires that occurred late last night and early this morning in the residence portion of the city. All about 15 lives were imperiled by the fires, and there were heroic deeds of rescue by the firemen. M. W. Littlefield, Mrs. M. W. Littlefield, Curtis Jameson and Frank Hampden were overcome by smoke and rescued by firemen. The two small children of Mrs. H. F. Hamp, sleeping on the first floor, were also overcome by smoke and rescued by their mother at the peril of her life. The total loss will not amount to $50,000. Most of the fires were caused by overheated furnaces. Topeka, Kan., Feb. 19. — Two men were killed and several others were injured in a fire that destroyed the residence portion of the city. All of the firemen were injured, and the fire was quickly extinguished. The fire was not discovered until late this morning. were instantly killed and three frightfully injured by the explosion of a locomotive boiler in the Santa Fe roundhouse this afternoon. The dead are: John Heustis, a boilermaker; NeU Linden, fireman. The injured are: John Linden, fireman. L. Keardsley, will probably die; Artie Sailor, bruised and badly shaken up, and Bert Shields, face cut and one eye injured. The explosion was caused by compressed air, which was to be used as a motive power in the "midget" locomotive, a small switch engine. Keardsley was letting the air into the boiler when the explosion occurred. Calaveras His Tree Grove, Shii Francisco, Feb. 17.—Robert Whiteside, of Duluth, Minn., has practically purchased the Calaveras High Tree grove, having paid the company owning it $1,000 for an option of $1,000. The price for the grove is $100,000, and it consists of 3,800 acres, he has already purchased 5,000 acres of timber land west of the Calaveras Grove and has bonded two other large tracts east and south of the big tree park. A joint resolution is preparing in Congress authorizing the secretary of the interior to open negotiations for the end of the Calaveras county groves of sequoia gigantea for a government park. If cakes and cookies stick to the pans in which they are baked, rub the pans with salt before using them again. 