1. "To live life with purpose" - is missing a comma after live
2. "But wellness and balance as our new rabbit." - there is no mention of a rabbit in the poem so far
3. "no more microwave whim" - what is microwave whim?
4. "We frequent our bank, with morals in mind," - this doesn't make sense
5.  "No longer a pig, in a cage on antibiotics." - this ruins what is otherwise the best bit of the poem by being crude
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