I'm in my late teens and live with my dad. The only time I go out is for my college classes. Sometimes when I see my friends I want to talk with them, but sometimes I won't want to talk to them for days or even weeks. Sometimes I feel i'm not worth knowing or i'm never going to do anything right. Are they right, am I depressed?
My family says I have depression
Those are really heavy feelings to have, even if you don't meet the cookie-cutter criteria of depression.It seems like you are still pretty young and maybe have recently graduated? It's normal in the late-teen development phase to have a lot of self-doubt about who you are and what you want in life. There's so much pressure on people your age to figure out what you are supposed to be doing and it can be easy to criticize and compare yourself. It's also common to feel like a sense of loss if your high school relationships have changed since going to college. Maybe these things aren't happening for you, but if they are that's OK. Many college students experience what you are going through and there are usually campus counseling services at reduced rates for students. Right now with COVID-19, those may be via telehealth.What are your personal relationships in your life like? You mention living with your dad--is he a support? Is anyone else in your family supportive for you? It's not clear what role your family plays in your life or depression, but it seems like they are noticing some concerns about your behavior. If it seems like they are highlighting those out of concern, I wonder if they would also want to help you. That's not always everyone's situation, but there are a lot of online support groups, counselors, and resources if you are feeling alone.Other ways to cope with depression (no matter how intense) is to exercise. It's not a cure, but it has awesome benefits for the brain and has shown in studies to reduce anxiety and depression symptoms drastically. Even something like walking can help.If you feel it's unmanageable, you can talk to your primary doctor about medications that could be right for you. There are a lot out there developed for depressive symptoms that work pretty well for most people.Lastly, find some ways to show yourself that you are worthy! Notice in your question that you said "sometimes"--what are those other times you feel worthy? Or times that you feel you are doing things "right"? Reframing that voice in your head can help as well--like maybe you are just doing the best you can with what you have. Could that be true? And that doesn't mean you don't make mistakes! Mistakes are part of being human, and you can definitely cope with them.Hope this helps!