I'm obsessing about a terrible breakup. Everything is a constant reminder. How do I move on?
Initially, everything is a reminder because there is a trace of that other person present in everything in your life.When we lose someone, we're saying goodbye to what we thought our future was going to be. Accepting that's changed and allowing ourselves to envision a new future is necessary to "move on".Start learning something new or try a new activity that you've always wanted to do. Find whatever is "good" about being out of the relationship and focus on those things. This can be an exciting time of transformation for you. As time goes by, you'll add new things in your life that aren't entwined with this relationship and those things will begin to crowd out those things associated with the relationship. Give yourself a little empathy, no one goes through a breakup without being sad. It's ok to be sad. It's even ok to feel devastated. Loss of a relationship touches a primal need we have to belong. It makes us feel insecure, unanchored. In truth, we are ok, safe even. This experience will open different perspectives for you. There are lessons you'll take from it that will add another facet to you as a person. Maybe in time, you'll even appreciate this experience. I'm sorry you're hurting right now. Best wishes to you,Allison