I am a single mother. As a child, I was molested by my mother's boyfriend. I never knew my father. I started having children at 18 right after high school. After having children, I completely lost myself and gave all of my focus on my children. Now my children are getting older, but I still don't know myself. I've had several attempts at relationships, and they all fail. I stopped caring about a lot after my children's father left me. I fell into a spiral and got depressed.
How do I get to know myself?
What your are experience is normal for most women. We usually forget about self and totally focus on our children putting our personal wants and needs aside. So to answer your question of how do you get to know yourself I usually do a 6 session course with my client by having them answer questions such as the following in the first session: What do I love? (other than your children) What are my own needs and desires? What 3 things have I accomplished in my life that I'm most proud of? What are 5 strengths or qualities I have? What is one event that had a major impact on my life? How have that event affected my life today? For their homework assignment after the 1st session, they are asked to write a letter to self tell self what they love, cherish, appreciate and even admire about themselves. Most women feel awkward at first, but I remind them that the truth is that only to the extent that you are able to love and value yourself, you are to love and support others.