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WEDNESDAY, JANUARY 26, 1016
BOOSEVEIiT AND “BIG BUSINESS"
Former President Theodore Roose
velt would wear a yellow blanket and
a sliver collar and follow fawning be
hind a most sordid and dictatorial of
Wall Street trusts, stopping only to
lick the hand that held the chain, if
he could be guaranteed another term
as President. No circus dog ever
turned trick to the crack of the whip
snore.jreadily and gracefully than the
former President would serve boss or
money that would place him once
mpire in the sun. That he is today
asking, coaxing, promising “Big
Business" for support has been es
tablished beyond reasonable doubt.
The ego-inflated ''reformer” politician
and Roughrider hero, who begged a
governorship from Boss Platt, excori
oration of whom had been a Roosevelt
Industry, now gray-haired but still
ambitious for the stage’s center, is
binding the hinges of the knee be
fore the “Money Power” which he
berated so vociferously in the days
when muckraking was in power.
And there are those who look upon
government control as an incident of
business who would put a vain-glo
rious, swashbuckling truckler for
spotlight, with whose characteristics
none are more familiar, at the head
•f the American nation, even in time
of great stress such as that which
lowers heavily at the present time,
Just because they think that he can
keep the gun and shell making rolls
and lathes and gauges in motion and
maintain the tide of dividends at full
flood.
However, we have too much con
fidence in American patriotism to be
lieve that they will ever again be fool
ad by the ambitious Colonel. We
hatre too much confidence in the pa
triotism of those Americans who do
business on Wall Street, to believe
that a majority of them will attempt
to raise the Oyster Bay fame seeker
to the first place in national author
ity. We have too much confidence
in the ranks and file of Republicans
to believe that they would tolerate
such a sacrifice of principle to expe
diency as would be involved in the
nomination of Col. Roosevelt as their
party candidate for the Presidency.
We believe that Col. Roosevelt's sun
has set. We believe that the Ameri
can people are tired of him.—Alas
kan Daily Empire.
WUJL THEY TAKE HER IN?
President and Mrs. Wilson are
back in Washington, the President
to see whether he can keep Austria
in American society and his wife to
see if she can break into Washington
society. There has been more or less
gOBSip in the “exclusive” circles of
the capital over the question as to
whether or not Mrs. Wilson, her for
mer husband having been “in trade,”
is entitled to recognition by the ex
treme upper set—or should it be up
pish? Mr. Galt was a jeweler and
made his living by working. He left
a considerable fortune the income of
which will contribute to the jiin
money fund of the handsome new
mistress of the White House. In the
ripe opinion of some it is tainted
money. It is damp with sweat. Galt
labored with his hands.
Would it not be a comical com
mentary upon American equality if
the fashionable class should choose
to snub the leading lady of the land?
That could be altogether possible in
Wew York City, where, as is well
--THE
EMPRESS
TO-NIGHT
2 Shows—at 8 and 9:20,sharp
PROGRAM
PATHE WEEKIjY’NEWS
The Club Girl*—Comedy
Love Among the Rooeo -
Biograph Drama
The Product—Swell Vltagraph
Story v
Geo. Ade Fable, Comedy.
Four Times Veteran—Comedy
Mary Pickford in "The Eagle’s
Mate on Thursday.
Admission Z8e and 10c.
known, there is such an aping of the
English that everything which
smackB of trade—except the inalien
able right to refuse to pay one’s bills
—is beyond the pale of honorable
breeding.
We of the west cannot comprehend
a state of mind like that, but it ex
ists, attributable to too much wealth,
too much idleness, too much igno
rance. It is another one of the vari
ous branches of social insanity, be
ing the extreme antithesis of the ex
tremist democracy, which also runs
into the unbalance at times.
The prohibition law of the State of
Washington provides that one may
have liquor in one’s home but not
give it away in public places. A pub
lic place, according to the interpre
tation of the law, is a place where all
may enter freely, each one enjoying
the same privileges as the other. John
Eden, who rooms at the Club, was
arrested on charge of having liquor
in his possession, contrary to the stat
utes made and provided. Eden, on
the contrary claims that his rooms at
the club constitute his home, and that
he is as much entitled to have liquor
in his room as the man who lives in
a private residence. Both sides have
engaged counsel and the fight will
settle the club status. The police of
the city were against prohibition, and
are making the law as obnoxious as
possible in order that people will
sign the Initiative for a referendum
vote on the question again this fall.
Prohibition does not take well in Se
attle, as it cut heavily into the land
lords and restauranteurs pockets, and
diverted thousands of dollars from
the earnings of fallen women. Seat
tle was fast becoming a fester in
Washington’s moral life, and a period
of right living will hurt her none.
Fairbanks has had twenty-seven
fires in the history of the town, caus
ed by electricity, directly traceable
to poor wiring and bad workmanship.
Valdez has never had a fire attribu
table to electricity, as the electric
company here employs none but skill
ed workman, and uses the best and
heaviest insulated wire obtainable,
with a high conductivity. Cordova
shuts her water off all but two hours
a day, owing to the cold weather, and
fear of fires, and her citizens suffer
for H20 many times. Valdez has an
abundance of good water, obtainable
at all times, and at the cheapest rate
in the Northwest. Our blessings are
manifold, did we but stop to con
sider them.
All reports from steamship officials
show that the coastal line has been
whipped by the most severe gales on
record. Blinding snow squalls, heavy
fogs and gales of fearful velocity
have rendered navigation difficult and
dangerous, and yet with all this rec
ord-breaking weather not a ship has
been lost nor a passenger injured this
winter. This is marvellous record,
and speaks well for the superior sea
manship of the officers in command cf
the northbound steamships, when you
consider the treacherous waters of
the North Pacific.
Seattle transportation companies
are having trouble with the car lines
on account of the deep snow. When
the snow gets too deep in Valdez we
tie up the dogs and mush on snow
shoes; and the jitney service co3ts
us nothing.
With Wilson, Bryan and Roosevelt
swinging around the circuit preach
ing. war and rumors of war, the cit
ies on the Chautauqua circuit will
imagine they are having a glimpse
of the simon-pure article.
We may now look for columns of
criticism upon the proper way to ex
pend that two million dollar emer
gency appropriation.
. —... • m • ■
It is estimated that the sun pos
sesses enough heat atoms to furnish
light and warmth for 100,000,000
years. What a strong competitor it
may turn out to be for the coal trust.
‘ -
England has threatened to get up
pish and buy nothing from any nation
that sells to the Germans. We would
advise Alaskans to keep cool and re
member that copper is still 30 cents.
It is reported that the mercury
went to 86 below at Yukon river
points the past week. That’s nothing,
since Judge Spence instituted suit
against the Tillikum Club the tem
perature in and around his office has
reached 120 below and the coldness
is increasing.
• •
The launch Shamrock, Capt. Tim
Marcum, left thismornlng on her reg
ular midweek trip to Ellamar, Fidal
gp, Landlock and. other points dowm
the Sound where mining operations
are being carried on. K. D. Reiter
and Chas. McCallum were passengers
for Fidalgo Bay, and Mrs. Boyd and
Lottie Thorstensen for Ellamar.
Capt. Marcum will sail for Fort Wells
next Saturday and will carry mail,,
passengers and freight. There are a
number of miners in fawn who have
been waiting for the leather to mod
erate so that they could return to
their work in the mines down the
Sound.
RAISING CAPITAL
Young 8am Clemons and His Chume In
a Coonskin Deal.
The adventures of Sum Clemens nnd
his comrades would till several books
of the size of "Tom Sawyer." Many
of them are. of course, forgotten now.
but those still remembered show that
Mark Twubi had plenty of real mate
rial.
It wits not easy to get money In those
days, and the boys were often without
It. Once Buck Blankenship had the
skin of a coon he had captured an<)
offered to sell It to raise capital. At
Selins’ store on Wildcat corner the
coonskln would bring 10 cents. But
this was not enough. The boys thought
of a plan to make it bring more.
Seims' back window was open, and
the place where he kept his pelts was
pretty bandy... Huek went around to
the front door and sold the skin for 10
cents to Seims, who tossed it back on
the pile. Then Buck came back and
ufter waiting a reasonable time crawl
ed in the open window, got the coon
skin and sold it to Selma again. The
boys did this several times that after
noon. and the capital of the band grew
But at last John Pierce, Seims’ clerk,
said:
“Look here. Mr. Seims; there’s some
thing wrong about this. That boy has
been selling us coonskins all the after
noon."
Seims went back to his pile of pelts
There were several sheepskins, but
only one coonskln. the one be had that
moment bought.
Seims himself In after years used to
tell this story as a great joke.—Albert
Bigelow Paine in St. Nicholas.
HUMOR AS A WORLD FORCE.
Contrasting the Man Who Create With
the Men Who Destroy.
Sir Herbert Tree in a lecture at the
Birmingham and Midland institute
said:
"Humor way be a help or a clog In
life. Many great men have been with
out It I think it may be broadly
stated that men of action, the great
destroyers, the men who take, are as
a rule devoid of humor, while men of
imagination and contemplation, those
who create, who give, have tb.e gift of
humor. Among those pre-eminently
gifted with humor were Abraham Lin
coin. Disraeli. Goethe and Heine, the
late Lord Salisbury, Arthur Balfour.
Dickeus. Thackeray, Fielding. Shake
speare, Queen Elizabeth, Henry VIII..
Charles II.. Dr. Johnson. Charles
Lamb, Emerson and Byron.
"I could enlarge upon this theme un
til your eyelids would no longer wag
But 1 will content myself with con
trasting as typical examples of the
yea and nay of humor two of the
world's greatest men—Shakespeare and
Xa|>o!eon. the arch creator and the
arch destroyer.
"Shakespeare gave an abiding Joy.
one that win contribute to the' happi
ness. the education and the ennobling
of mankind throughout the ages, 'in
states unborn and accents yet un
known.' Napoleon, on the other band,
took from mankind millions of lives
•ind set humanity wailing.”—London
Telegraph.
A Queer Diagnosis.
A celebrated Dublin physician was
Sir Dominic Corrigan, who was aB
much famed for his brusqueness to
ward patients as for his skill. In the
course of some reminiscences William
Charles Scully told a story of the doc
tor which Is quite well worth quoting.
"1 was taken to see him,” says the
writer, "several times, but he always
treated me with the utmost kindness
However, a highly respectable maiden
aunt of mine had a different expert
enee. She went to consult him. After
sounding her—none too gently—and
asking a few questions be gave a grunt
and relui>sed into silence. Then after
a short pause of meditation be said.
•Well, ina’am, it's one of two things—
either you drink or else you sit with
your back to the Are.’"
More Lovable. 1
Two peevish old dames were sent
over to inspect a Ited Cross hospital in
France. They came hack and' reported
that a black cat was kept as a pet in
the institute. The head of the hospital
was written to about it and replied:
“The black cat is the Tommies’ mas
cot. and they're fond of her—a lot
fonder than they were of the two old
cats you sent out here to inspect ns.”—
Chicago Herald.
Newly Discovered Talents.
“Of course 1 shrieked when I thought
there wus a burglar hi the bouse.” said
young Mrs. Turk Ins.
“Wbut did your husband do?”
“Charley looked at me with deep re
proach and asked why I couldn't hol
ler that way once In awhile when the
home team needed a boost.”—Wash
ington 8 tar
The Beat Chance.
Grubbs—Why did you Indorse so cor
dlally Utehntue’s application for ap
(■ointment to a place In the cousular
service?
Btubbs— Because I could not think of
anything else that was likely to carry
him farther sway from home."—Rich
mond Times-Dlspatcb.
t '-:---:
Hs Went.
Rhe—What are you thinking of. Mr.
Bor ley? He—I was thinking It was
time to go home. She— Now, here Is
the difference between men and wo-,
men—I arrived at that conclusion long J
ago. and yon have only Just worked It
out _-_
There are no chagrins so venomous I
an the chagrin of the Idle: no pangs
so sickening as the satieties of ptees
uce — Raskin • '<
ENGLISH LEGAL TERMS.
Use of Now Needless 8ynonyms Is a
Thirteenth Century Legacy.
When the English courts of the thir
teenth century desired to make It
known that a man bad been murdered
they bad to take into account the con
fusion of languages in England. Be
cause every Englishman did not use
the same word for "kill" It was neces
sary to rake the languages of Europe
for synonyms In order that every
wight In Albion, whatever his educa
tion or ancestry, might find at least
one word which he understood.
And lawyers today retain all these
Norman and Saxon synonyms. It is
not enough that an indictment shnll
allege that a man was "unlawfully
killed with a club.”, but that he was
“unlawfully, feloniously. Illegally, In
tentionally and diabolically ktled. slnin.
done to death, murdered, slaughtered
and beaten till he was dead, with
a blunt instrument, club, stick, bludg
eon. billy, cane, staff, stave or cudgel."
If the bludgeon Is left out the accused
is set free. It Is also necessary to use
the words "thereupon” and “afore
said" at least seven times apiece or
the indictment Is faulty.
The effort to purge the law of medie
val inequalities and outworn theories
of justice Is almost as difficult as to
modernize Its language.—Des Moines
Register and leader.
STORY OF THE MISTLETOE.
A Curious Plant With a Curious Way
of Making a Living.
Very curious are the ways of the mis
tletoe. The story of how the mistletoe
gets on the trees is a most interesting
one. Covering the mistletoe twigs are
pearly white berries. These come in
the winter season, when food Is com
paratively scarce, and hence some birds
eat them freely.
Now,'when a robin eats a cherry he
swallows simply the meat and flips the
stone away. The seed of the mistletoe
the bird cannot flip. It Is sticky and
holds to his bill. His only resource Is
to wipe it off. and he does so, leaving it
sticking to the branches of the tree on
which he is sitting at the time.
This seed sprouts after a time, and
not finding earth—which, indeed, its
ancestral habit has made It cease
wanting—it sinks its roots Into the bark
of the tree and hunts there for the
pipes that carry the sap.
Now, the sap in the bark is the very
richest in the tree, far richer than that
in the wood, and the mistletoe gets
front Its host the choicest of food.
With a strange foresight it does not
throw its leaves away, as do most
parasites, but keeps them to use in win
ter, when the tree is leafless.
Queer Collateral.
••Here Is a fact as strange as Jt is
true.” said an Egyptologist. “Mubs
tales in ancient Egypt were used chief
fly as collateral.
“When an Egyptian wanted to bor
row he gave his father's or grandfa
ther’s mummy as security. Sometimes
if he required a large sum be gave his
father and both grandfathers, and be
would.even throw in the mummy of
his inotber-ln-law if she fortunately
happened to be hi a mummified state.
’•Joking aside,” the Egyptologist con
tlnued. “what 1 tell you is the truth.
An Egyptian was not permitted to bor
row without pledging the mummy of
some near relative. It was deemed in
Egypt both impious and infamous not
to redeem so sacred a pledge as that,
and be who died with a family mummy
still in pawn was himself buried in un
consecrated ground.”
Boroughs of Greater Nineveh.
The ruins of ancient Nineveh, on the
Tigris river, are now fairly well deter
mined. The north wall, extending due
east from the river, was 7,000 feet
long, the eastern wall was three miles
long, the southern wall only 1,000 feet,
while the western or river front ex
tended for two and one-half miles
along the Tigris. The actual extent of
the city contained about 1,800 acres.
But Greater Nineveh—compare Greuter
New York—was made up of a tetrapo
11s of four cities—Nineveh proper.
Khorsabad. Calab and Keramils
whlch agrees with the dimensions giv
en by Diodorus, the Greek historian,
and fully justifies Jonah's path luto
the exceeding great city of three days’
journey.—Christian Herald.
The Deceit of Man.
She was buying some birthday cigars
for her buslmnd. and the dealer sold
her a box for 40 cents.
“Her husband will give you fits
when he gets those.” said a bystander
to the cigar man.
"Ob. no. he won’t.’’ said the dealer
placidly. “He told me to sell her those.
His wife would divorce him if she
knew he paid $T> a box for his cigars.”—
Ladies' Home Journal.
The Pyramid*.
The atones of the (treat pyramid* ere
not In Id with niortnr. The (treat piece*
tf atone were evidently rubbed lutck
wnrd and forward upon each other un
til the surfaces were assimilated to
each other, and so |»erfectiy assimilat
ed that to this day the breaks between
them can hardly be discerned.—New
York American.
Calculated.
Daughter—Do you think that paint
Ink look* like me. mother? M other
The face does, but no one would ever
(ptess that your (town cost your father
• cold $1.000.—Philadelphia Ledger.
The Quaker*.
The term Qttaker was lirst applied to
the sect because of-the founder’s fre
quent use'of the word "tremble” in hi*
exhortations.—London Teltorugh
S. BLUM & CO.,
(INCORPORATED)
To the Man Who Pays
$20 or More
And Who Hasn’t Learned to Come Here
$20 has been a popular clothing
price for years. Unconsciously mer
chants plan to mark a big line at $20.
Unconsciously men everywhere have
formed the $20-clothes habit.
We have a revelation for you men
with $20 or more to spend.
We will keep you from buying a
suit made and sold with the object of
catching “the popular price trade.”
We will sell you ;\
Styleplus <)t 17
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The new STYLE
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fabrics tempt men no
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We can fit your age
as well as your shape.
Special style concep
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Lots of men simply
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GOOD GOODS
CwY-ftl. <**».
Hmui Ww4«nkU. lM
DR. H. COCKERILLE
Graduate National University.
Washington. D. C.
DENTIST
Fourteen Years In Valdez.
PHONY! 110
Office Rooms In Whaling Building
DR. GERMAN
phonb is THE DENTIST
Office rooms over Owl Drug Store. Of
fice hours 9 a. m. to < p. m., 7 to 9
p. m. Sunday by appointment.
All Work Guaranteed.
E. C. DALTON,' M. D.
PHYSICIAN AND SURGEON]
Phone'42
Alaska Avenue Valdez, Alaska
DONOHOE & DIMGND
ATTORXKYS-AT-LAW
Oflcc OpiHialte Court Room
Phoae 84 VALDRS* ALASKA
JOHN LTON* »• RITCHIE
LYONS A RITCHIE
lTTOIt»KVI-*T-LAW 4 >.
OMcm la Wtaltaz Balldlaa
Phoae 10S VAS.DK*. ALASKA
Valdez Miners Union No. 188
W•store Federation of Miner*
ROBERT BHAFmyWJwft
OMir, McCAU-W^rsU^.
A. M. DIERINCER
Valdez Transfer
Company
Office on Alaska Avenue, in
George C. Treat Building
Telephone No. 60
General Trucking and Freighting
to all Interior Points.
LIVERY and FEED STABLE,
STORAGE,
Teaming of All Kinds
Positively No Coal Delivered Un
less Paid for in Advance
The Beat Place in Velde* to
Stop at ia the
Arctic Hotel
Vue, U*kl Rooaa-TW Hun* «f Cudut
RATES .‘REASONABLE
BATHROOM Sp*d*lRituBytL*Mm*
PHONE US MRS. STRING. Pta*
%
VALDEZ IDDGjf
no tea ,
Pm ui *«»**"l M>—Pit
Regular Communications first Wei*
nesct&y In each month tn. McKlihf
Ha». Vialtore ^
BD. WOOD. Secretary.
When b Seward Step at the
COLEMAN HOUSE
SEONOE SEXTON. ?»•*•
STRICTLY FIRST CUSS
Fourth Ats, aswsKt. Ahutos