OLD ENGLAND REVISITED.

Sir Goldwln Smith on the Changes

->f Flvo Years.

Mb GomwiN Smith contributes a sugges tivearticletothenewnumberof'Macmillan" on the changes he observes in England during tbe last five years, from which we ti'.o the following extracts :— The Future ot the Squire. Will tbe squire remain at his post, or will he fly from it, as the French aristocracy did when the day of trial came, and vege tate on the remnant of his income in a city or abroad ? If he remains at his post, happiness may yet be in store for him; perhaps greater happiness than he has known in his idle state. Of the three orders—landlord, farmer, and labourer— one, we are told, must go, for the land can no longer bear all throe. But the landlord and farmer may be fused into one, and rent may become the salary for superintendence. Of course the landlord must receive an agricultural training. Of fox-hunting and game-preserving thero is likely before long to be an end. Colonisation as a Calling, Bnt what is to become of the squire's younger sons and of the young gentry generally ? The professions and the genteol callings seom to be glutted, and now the women are pressing into them as well as the men. You will have a set of men bred in luxury, refined, sensitive, and wanting bread, than which nothing can be either more wretched or moro dangerous. In the older colonies not only the professions, but all the more intellectual and lighter callings, are almoßt as much overstocked as they are here. A man bringing out a little money and buying himself a farm in» Ontario may do very well, if he will make up his mind not only to manage but to work with his own hands. But otherwise we ha vo no room in Canada for any butf armlabourers and domestic servants. Colonisation, how ever, if it is to be the resource, will have to be taken up as a regular calling. The youth must learn not only farming, but a littlo of carpentering and everything eleo that may be necessary in a country whero the farmer cannot be always going to the mechanic. Athletics will not do ; they will give muscle and pluck, but they do not givo industry ; rather, they make against it, being, as thoy are, merely a healthy sort of dissipations. Your young athletic comos to the colony, shoots and hunt, spends his money, and drifts into the mounted police. "Waste, Luxury, Distribution."

Wealth of course brings luxury, the ap paratus of which is always growing vaster and more elaborate. In case of a pinch, England has three margins to draw upon —waste, which is still greater hore than in France, though not so great as in America ; the cost of distribution, which is excessive; and luxury. Among luxuries are not to be counted the healthy amusements which are made more than ever necessary by the pressure and tension of commercial life. Io travelling I have been struck with the number of cricket matches and local festiviaes of all kinds that wore going on. The bicycle, too, is evidently a moat happy invention ; it must not only give healthy pleasure to city youth, but tako away city pleasures which aro not so healthy. England has roads suited for the bicycle, which America has not. .

"Life Growing Softer."

Life seems to be growing softer in Eng land and more refined. There is an in creased love of art, of flowers, and of music. I waa struck at Oxford with the flowers in the windows of students, and the sounds of music from their rooms. Laivn tennis, at which women play, is sapping, and will in Pthe end kill, cricket unless it has in it, like croquet, the seeds of its own death. Cricket ■requires too many hands and too much time, especially since the defence of the wicket has become superior to tho attack. 'American base-ball is a throughly manly game, is very lively, and is played in the afternoon. The loss of a manly game would tell on English character.

The Passion For Excite _ent.

With luxury may be coupled, as arising out of the same moral conditions, combined with the electric and telegraphic state of the world, the passion for excitement, which seemi to threaten the sobriety and steadiness of English character aa much as its fortitude ie threatened by luxury. It is having a sinister effect on politics. The first duty of a political leader now is to excite and amuse, and he who can do this may mount without wisdom or character to the high places of the State. Vice. There are ominous mutteringa about_ the growth of vice, especially ia London society. Luxury, great cities, and deferred marriage are sure to produce their effects. Probably whatever corruption there is extends to all classes, though the scandal sticks to the higher, and especially to members ot the House of Lords, which would do well to introduce a censorship. Beyond this, too, there are abysses here and there in human nature. English homes, apparently, in geneial are pure, ond man ond wife are true to each other. In the country, wnere the young squires must havo opportunities, one hardly ever hears of cases of soduc tion. But it would surely not be wonder ful if in the moral interregnum between the reign of religion and that of science, supposing that a reign of scienco is coming, Belf-induleence should become more unre strained. Bishop Fraeer, who was a man of sense, and no bigot, used to say positively that ib bad. Nor would it be surprising if this were to extend to the political and commercial as well as the social sphere. Tbero is another quarter, besides that in which " Minotaurism " arises, to which the attention of those who specially concern themselves with these questions might be turned. Against impurity pure union alone can guard. The mightiest and moat ir resistible of human passions will not be chidden out of existence by homilies and objurgations, in however shrill a key.

We are Not Serious Enough. Luxury and love of excitement cannot be favourable to a seriousness of character or to vigour of national spirit. In the late crisis I think it was impossible not to note a want of seriousness, and to feel that national spirit was at rather a low obb. A race or a cricket match seemed to nil the public mind as much as the peril of the nation ; and men appear to be at liberty to commit with perfect impunity every sort of outrage against patriotism, even to the extent of openly sending advice to foreign conspirators against British power aa to the best mode of effecting their designs. Women. Women are more and more asserting their independence and their right to com pete ia all things with men. Some of tbe male professions and callings thoy have already invaded; the rest they intend to invade They usurp man's hendgear and ulster: some of them, man's cigarette Their appearances on the platform become more numerous, and they talk regularly of "going into public life." Whether Nature showed good judgment and taste in makine two- sexes is a question wbicb, Osteal of being left to be settled by trad, tion is apparently to be submitted to tho test of experience. Literature and the Drama. In literature there appears to be a pause. Fiction hae come down to sensational stories, such aa "Solomon's Mines." "The Trea sure Island." or "Called Back," and no new poet appears. The drama, too, seems tolanguish. I went to thetwop.eees of the day, and found the acting excellent, but ?h. plays themselves naught; there was scarcely a stroke of art, scarcely a touch of wit or pathos, and the plots were tissues of improbabilities the mort crude and revolt ing. Is this falling off in art and literary production which everybody notes mere y a contemporary accident, or is the world about to pasß definitively from its ajsthetic, poetic, and literary youth to a maturity of science ? Journalism. In Engl, h journalism assuredly there is no falling-off. Its ability and power have beon steadily on the increase ; more ana more it draws away the real debate from Parliament to itself. The increase of force is especially remarkable in the great provin cial journals. To a great extent the future of England will bo in the keeping of its P res3, ______———

Foote once asked a man without a sense of tune in bim, "Why are you for ever iumming that tune ?" becauao it haunts no," was the reply. . "No wonder, wd ffoote, "you are for ever murdering it. .

BURNED AT SEA.

Fate of the Packet Three Princes.

AN OLD-TIME OCEAN HOitTtOK.

How a Woman's Life \f_- Needlessly Sacrificed by some Sr.ilors.

" I was only 13 yeara of age when I left Cape Town to return to England with my uncle," said Robert Johnson, in telling the story of the ill-fated paokot, the Three Princes. " This waa thirty-five years ago, but all the details are very fresh in my mind. " Tho packet had a crew of twenty-five or thirty men, and left the Capo with over 100 passengers and a large freight. His uncle was an army officer named Dunning, a Cap tain, who was returning home ou leave of absonce to recruit his health. The voyage was without event until tho packet had made a distance of about 600 miles. When off Cape Frio she encountered very heavy woather for two days, losing hor foremast and bowsprit and springing a leak. The injuries were in process of ropair, when, at dead night, with the ship rolling heavily ia the swell left by the galo, the cry of tire Was heard. A genoral alarm had scarcely bean sounded when it was realised that the ship was doomed. The flames had caught in the foro hold, and wero fei by such inflammable materials that thoy soon burst through tho deck. As a matter of fact, aftor the first quarter of an hour, the ship's officers wero un ablo to inforce the discipline. The sailors looked upon tho ship as lost and wanted to be off in the boats, aud thoir example had its influence on many of the passengers. Captain Dunning and throe or four other army officers stood at tho boats with cocked pistols, and prevented the rush which .vould have taken place. Tho ship wns headed so aa to keep tho flamea forward, and the work of lowering the boats and telling off their complement was begun by a few cool-headod men. There wero boats enough to accommodate all, and when this was realised the cowards aud skulkers took heart and offered thoir assistance. There was need of baste, and for thia reason some of tho boats put off without water or provisions, whilo others had only a very short supply. The boat in which young Johnson and his unclo got away had a four-gallon keg of wator and a bag of biscuits, but the latter wero rendered almost useless by the shipping of a soa, which likewise nearly swamped the boat. Thore woro in all fourteen persons, all adults except the one. Of these four woro women, three of whom wore wives, and tho fourth was a waiting maid. None of the boats contained fowor persons, ond somo of them carried tivo or six moro. All had been provided with masts and sails and oars, and the location of tho ship, about 100 miles off tho Capo, was quite generally un derstood. When the Captain finally loft the ship he called the boats about him aud gave such general instructions as ho be hoved would insure their safety. He pro posed to hold up for St. Paul do Loaodo, then the nearest port of civilisation. This was a matter of 300 miles, but could be made in four or five days and nights if tho weather proved favourable. It was ordered that the boats keep together, and that at noon of that day—it was now com ing daylight—there should be a general dis tribution of provisions, so that all should abare alike.

During tho latter part of tbe night, and up to 7 o'clock in the morning, tho breeze was very light, but the boats had scarcely got the course to steer whon a bank of clouds rolled up. the breeze increased to half a gale, and the horrors of shipwreck in mid ocean lowered down on each frail craft. While an effort was made to keep together, noonday came to find the fleet so scat tered that the people in young John son's boat could distinguish only one other, and that one rapidly passing from their sfeht. The boat was in charge of the Bhip's third mate, a Mr Welnrum. Ho proved to bo a man without nerve or authority. Aside from Captain Dunning, young Roberts and tho four women mentioned, there were no other passengers. This made six passen gers to eight sailors, and as the captain was tho only man, the sailors seemed to feel that they had things their own way. In this the mate sided with them. The passengers wore huddled together in cramped quarters, tho terror of the women was ridiculed and scoffed at, and whilo the sailors drank their fill from tho wator keg, the people amidships were supplied with scarcely enough to wet their tongues. Captain Dunning indignantly protested against their treatment, and wa3 coolly answered by one of tbe sailors that it anybody was tG suffer it should be the passengers. The boat was- over loaded anyhow, he said, and if he had his way he would pitch all the women overboard. This speech opened the eyes of the Captain to the fact that he had a heartless lot of men to deal with, and that in ca_> of further disaster or prolonged vpyaging they would stick at nothing. He rejoiced exceedingly ovor the fact that he had brought his pistols with him. In case of a conflict the one single man would be a match for tho eight. "Of all the boats only ono was lost, tho others being picked up by an England brig. Of the four women in our boat Miss Richardson's fate has been told. One of the others was dead when they came to lift her up, and the other two wore so near perish ing that it waa weeks before thoy woro restored to health and strength. My uncle made a report to the captain of the ship, but as that officer was burdenod with his own personal troubles he did not carry the matter furthor, and no investigation was ever made by the legal authorities. "At 3 o'clock in the afternoon, aftsr the last boat had passed from sight, the littlo craft was struck by a 3quall and her mast snapped in twain. It was a close shave that sail and mast did not go ovorboard, but the case was bad enongh as it was. It was o quartering wind off the land, with a smart Bea following, and although a shift was mado to use an oar in place of the maßt, more or less water was shipped, ond the progress of the boat was greatly lessened. However beforo midnight the wind abated and the sea went down, and tho terror-stricken women revived enough to call for water and food. Water was given them in small quantities, but the bißcuit had long ago become a doughy mass which no one would taste. When they moaned with pain and hunger then were roughly ordered to "shut up "and be thankful that nono of them bad been thrown overboard to lighten the boat. The mate bad by this time lost all his authority, and was ob served to be on tbe best of terms with all the men. There was no compass in the boat, and as the weather continued cloudy, the sailors lost their reckoning. But for this, they would have attempted to carry out a plan which one of the women heard them discussing. This was to rob tho pas s»ngers of what money and jewellery they had brought along, pitch them over board, and then make for the land, trust ing that they might hang off and on until picked up by a ship. ,_.__._, ~u , " The noxt day broke fair, with but little wind and sea. The land, according to Cap tain Dunning's notion, was dead ahead, but the sailors disputed this, and as after events proved, headed out into the Atlantic. The water keg was emptied that morning, one of the mon drinking at least half a pint while some of tho women did not get above three thimblefuls. Tho storm having passed, tho sun came out hot and the weather became muggy, and before nosn thero was real suffering. Each woman W3S fully dressed, and each had brought with hor more or less jewellery. As the weather cleared up the bedraggled and suffering wretches had little or no hope left. Captain Dun ning sought to encourage them, but they crouched down in the boat and refused to better their condition. The pangs of hunger came sharp upon the sailors after noon, it now being forty hours since they had eaten. A part pf them insisted that the course was wrong and were for heading another way, bun the wind settled the question by dying entirely out. "There was much wrangling among the sailors during the afternoon," said Johnson, "and two or three times I saw knives drawn. My uncle asked bo questions, nor were any put to him. They ignored us entirely, except now and then to curseone of the women for groaning out. I was in good flesh and a hardy boy, and up to this time I had not suffered for the want of food. It seemed that I could drink a wholo pail of water, but I fought the idea away as much as possible, and secured conaiderable satisfaction by holding a metal button in my mouth. When the sun went down and the calm still held

the sailors were cursing in a way terrible to hear, and my uncle whiepered to mo that he expected something dreadful to happen beforo morning. What it was I did not ask him, for I.was under the influence of a great fear. As the boat lost steerage way the sailors had congregated forward, while the passengers had moved ait. We were thus divided off. The nearest ono to the sailors was Mra Richardson, the laJy's maid. She had been overcome from the very outeot, and since getting away from the ship has been lying in a stupor. I can't say that sho wasn't dead when the darkness of that night shut down. My uncle pulled some of tho women further astern as night-came, but I do not think she moved. "I set out to keep awake at night, but sleep soon overcame me. and it was morn ing when I awoke. It was the angry voices of tho men which aroused me, and I found that my uncle had moved to the centre of tho boat ond hod his pistols out. Three of the mon had oars uplifted and the others had drawn their knives. Thero was some thing of a breeze, but the boat was left to itself. I looked around to find Misa Richardson gone, and I soon undorstood tho situation. A couple of hours before daybroak and while my uncle was a3leep, tho men had pulled her body forward. I cannot say that they turned cannibals. There wero blood stains undor their feet, and it appeared as if they had drunk her blood at least. This they denied to a man afterward, doclaring that sho was dead, aud that tho corpse was flung over to lighten the boat and make moro room. However that might have been, they had sprung up at daybreak and demanded that one of tho women be given up to them to ap pease hunger and thirst, My uncle arcued and coaxed and threatened, but in"the ond he had to bring out his pis tol and declare that he would shoot the first man who approached. They were a desperate lot of fellows, but there was that iv his demeanour which made thorn pause. The result, 1 think, would have boon a rush at him, for thoy seemed rock loss of thoir lives, but for a sight which I was first to discover. It was that of a sail in tho north. As soon as I had shouted my discovery a truce was tacitly agreed upon, and both oars and sail woro put into use to work up to the stranger. It was a French ship bound around the Capo, and she hod already picked up two of our boats. Sho ran down to us in a couple of hours, and wo found the crews of the Captain and the bosuns boats safe and sound on her decks to greet us."

A Reign of Terror.

An occasional correspondent sends to tho " Levant Herald" a lotter from Sulelmanieh (Mesopotamia), in which ho says : —" For somo time past there has boen a reign of terror in Mesopotamia. Tbe outlook is very dark, commorce has totally dis appeared, and the high roads can no longer bo safely used for the purposes of communi cation. People at home aro mounting guard ovor their houses at night for foar of boing attacked when they least expect it. Two-thirds of the population of Suleimanieh and the villages of the neighbouring dis tricts havo abandoned their homes, (lying in all directions. Communication between Bagdad and Mossoul is interrupted, and the postal service between these two towns can only be carried on with the help of an armed detachment of horsemen from 300 to 400 strong." The causes to which this complete state of anarchy is due tho correspondence ex plains as follows : " It is known tbat the province of Bag dad and a preat part of Mesopotamia are overrun by Kurdish and Arab nomad tribes. Among theee tribes, that of Hamavends, which is the most turbulent, is composed of a handful of brigands who live by pillage and rapine. It comprises 1,000 souls—men women, and children. Every time that these people find themselves close'y pursued by the Imperial troops, they cross into Persian territory, whence, as they continue their depredations, thoy aro chasod by tho troops of tho Czar, in which caae tho Hama vends again seek refugo on Turkish soil. These trips over the frontier have been going on for a long time. At present this interesting community is on Ottoman torritory, and theirmisdeeda are perpetrated with such violence that tho whole of Kurdistan is terrorised. God alone knows all the sufferings which tbey aow on passage. People will perhaps bo astonished to hear that tho fighting forces of this tribe of 1,000 soula aro composed of GO horsemen and '200 foot soldiers., And it is wonderful to think that this band of 200 Kur dish Brigands dovaatates the wholo of Mesopotamia, from Bagdad to Aleppo, be fore whom the inhabitants fiv in a body, and who put the civil and military authorities of this very country to the greatest straits. At Kerkouk nobody hazards to leavo the centre of the town for fear of being caught by the Hamavends and killed on the spot. • "These brigands have the most brutal and savage instincts ; they kill in cold blood all those who have tho misfortune to fall into their hands, whether soldiers, officers, functionaries, women, or children ; and, what is still moro cruel, they subject thoir victims to the most horrible tortures. " Somo days ago a caravan, composed of a regiment mufti (almoner) and his family, asergaantand 10 cavalry troopers, and about a hundred othor people all armed , was go ing from Mossoul to Kerkouk. At about an hour's distance from Kerkouk the caravan was attacked by the Hamavend Kurds, who dispersed it like a flock of sheep killing some of the travellers, whilo thoy robbed others, and carried off the mufti's wifo. The latter with his children retraced hia stops in search of his wife whom he found lying in a swoon at a certain distance from tho sceno of tho onslaught. Ho managed to reach Kerkouk, where he arrived in a most pitiablo plight. There are many other instances of the ter rible misdeeds of the Hamavends which I wish to relate, but I reserve thorn for my next letter. The inhabitants of Suleimanieh Mossoul. Kerkouk, and other localities have Eant a memorial to Constan ti nopleaddreased to the Sultan asking to ba delivered from the persecution of the Hamavends."

Three Months on an Island.

The three-masted schooner Jerfalcon, which arrived at Melbourne from Maldon Island, brought as passengers Captain Myers, the firat and second mates, and three men of the barque Oiana, which was wrecked on the llth August through striking a reef in the vicnity of Stornbuek Island. From information supplied by Captain Myers it appears tbat the Diana left Puget Sound on the 12th July, bound to Sydney with a -cargo of lumber. Moderately fine weather was experienced until the 9th of August, when at midnight the weather suddenly changed to tho oast ward, accompanied by heavy rains ond squalls and thick drizzling weather. An observation was taken at noon on tho following day, when tho vessel's position was apce°tained to be lat. 3.50 S., and lon. 1.50.28 W. At about a quarter past 2 o'clock on the following morning the veasel struck on a reef, and as the sea commenced breaking over her it wns deemed advisable for the safety of those on board to cut away her masts in order to ease hor as much aa possiblo. The deck load got adrift, ond was washing about, and it became absolutely dangerous for those on board the vessel to move about, owing to the floating timber. Seeing that the condition of the veasel was hopeless, Captain Myora had a raft con structed, and by that means a portion of the crew reached tho shore, and made the necessary arrangements by means of lines to land the others. This was ultimately done, and it waa then found that the vessel had Btruck on a reef in the neighbourhood of the eaat side of Storn buck Island. Sufficient provisions having been landed, two boats were subsequently rescued, without damage, and on tbe 21st September an attempt was made to leave the island, but.owing to bad weather the mon were compelled to return. The bad weather continuing, no further attempt waa made to leave the island until tbe 12th October, when four men, including the cap tain, left in each boat, the remainder prefer ring to remain behind. The boats en deavoured to make a start for Maldon Island, Owing, however, to head winds the attempt was frustrated, and a course was accordingly steered for Manahiki, which was reached on the 23rd October. While at thiß island the three masted schooner Buster, bound to Auck land, called, and one of the crew took service with the captain of that vessel, tne captain promising to call and look after the men who had been left at Stornbuek. The Jerfalcon called at Manahiki on the 10th November, and brought on Captain Mjrers and hia crew to Melbourne.

A GENERATION OF JUDGES.

.REMINISCENCES OF THEIR CAREERS,

Some Good Stories.

(JKOJI OUB LONDON CORRESI'ONDENT).

London, October 22. Few little books of the same size will com pare for wit, humour, anecdote and in formation with tho brochure on " A Generation of Judges " by an anonymous barrister,* just issued. The judges that come into view range from Cochburn to Watkin Williams. I append oxtraots :—

Chief Baron Kelly.

The " Reporter " recalls Chief Baron Kelly's insistence for tho date of overy fact. " Give him somo date," said a loader to his junior thus hard pressed, " any date will do to keep him quiet." At these times it was an interesting spectacle to see how, when Kelly was per plexing a caae in Banco with endless re petitions and immaterial inquiries, Bram well, his old pupi^sitting on his right would firmly ond tenderly tako him in hand, and make all plain with a fow trenchant statements. His stylo of speaking, never in his younger days concise, developed in hia age into tediousness. "My good woman," ho would say to a witness, " you must give an answor, in the fewest possible words of which you aro capable, to the plain and simple question whether, whon you wero crossing tho street with the baby on your arm, and tho omnibus was coming down on tho right side, and the cab on tho loft side, and the brougham was try ing to pass the omnibus, you saw the plaintiff between tho brougham and the omnibus or botweon the brougham and the cab, or between the omnibus and the cab, or whether and when you Baw him at all, and whether or not near the brougham, cab, and oranibuß, or either or any two, and which of them respectively—or how was it 5" In the course of arguments in Banco he bocamo garrulous, and his judgments were very easy to tako down. If any passage woro missed, the reporter had only to wait till bo came round to it again. Like a raco run in laps, Kelly's judgments always passed tho post sovoral times.

A Housebreaker's Opinion of Baron Cleasby. Than Baron Cleasby, "no man was over more anxious to do right, more patient, or more laborious." He was the inildoat mannered of all mon at tho Bar. No one over encountered a harsh word from Cleasby, except that he had a way of sternly rebuking prisoners for the enormity of their crimes, and finiahm c with a ridiculously small sentonce. " You are one of tho worst men I over tried," Cleasby would say, " ond the sentence of tho Court is that you bo imprisoned for ono month." So it came about that he was not only popular with the Bench and the Bar, but with criminals. " You aro committed for trial," said a *magistrato to a rullian up for his fourth case of housebreaking ; " and you may choose whether you are tried at the quarter sessions next woek, or a month hence at the assizes." "Who is the judgo of tho 'soizo ?" askod Sikeß. " Baron Cleasby," said the magistrates' clerk. " Oh, I'll go to 'soize," returned tho criminal, with alacrity. " Cloasby is the judge for me." It was with feolings of pain that he sontenced O'Connor, the half-witted assailant of the Queen, to be whipped, although it waa only with twouty strokes of a birch rod.

Mr Justice Willcs's Courtship.

The following anecdote is told of Mr Juetico Willes :—Willea, in the days of his youth, before Littleton and Sheppard had absorbed his romance, fell in love with a lady at Cork, whoro his father lived. Thoy were engaged to be married when ho wont to London to seek his fortune. But learn ing waa not highly remunerated, and it was out of tho question that a poor special ploador should marry. Willes joined tho Home Circuit, and his namo began to bo known ; but whon it was suggoetod from Iroland tbat ho must be rich enough to marry, Willos was unable to agree. Even when he was appointed a member of tho Commission, this was rather a tax on his time than a source of income. At laat Willes was made a judgo. Now the salary of a judge con be learnod from an almanac, and it must bo confessed that, though not princely, it is enough to keop a wifo upon. Wliles had no longer tho excuse of poverty. As a lawyer he know tho forco of a contract, while a judge could hardly stand the brunt of an action for broach of promise of mar riage. This is tho tale accredited among lawyers of such romance as thore was in Willos's life. A Breach of Promise Case. Rare is an example of the astuteness of Mr Justice Byles as an advocate :—Once he was for the defendant in an action for broach of promise of marriage. The plain tiff proved the promise to marry, and that the defendant had married some one elae. Tbe case seemed a case of damage?, but Bylea put two questions to tho plaintiff: " Did he not promise to marry you whon his father was dead?" "Yea." "Is his father dead?" "No." "That is my cose, my lord." " But, brother Bylea," said the judge, " he has married some one else." " Wall, my lord," said Byles, "his wifa may die beforo his father, or afterwards, and he may outlive them both, when it will be time to fulfil the promiso." The plain tiff had, in fact, alloged in his pleading an absolute promiso, and tho proof of a con tinual promise waa what was called a fatal variance, which could not be amended. How, Sir John Holfcor Earned an Honest Sixpence. Sir John Holkor's simplicity of nature is woll illustrated.

Holker one day was leaving tho Houso of Commons when he was addrrseed by two strange ladies, who naked him to show them the Houae. He politely led the way, duly pointing out tho objects of interest. At the end ono of tho ladies handed to thoir conductor a sixpence, which the Queon's Atlorney-Geooral took with a low bow and afterwards hung upon his watch-chain, de claring that it was the only sixpence which he could safely say ho hid honestly earned. An Incident In the House of Lords. Mr Benjamin, though not a judge, is mentioned by the author : - At the end of the session of ISSI, Benjamin was arguing a caae in the House of Lorda, with Lord Selborno presiding. Tho learned counsel very early in his argument formulated, after his manner, the propositions of law for which ho was about to contend. One of these, when put in its bare lorm not supported by the substructure of reasoning which Benjamin could mako to look so solid and compact, nor illustrated by ex ample after example from his rich imagina tion, drew from Lord Chancollor Solborne tlie word " Nonsense I" Benjamin stopped short, slowly put his papers together, tied tho tape round them, made a low bow, and left tho bar of tbo House. His junior had immediately to fill the breach ; but before he had proceeded far in his argument, the Chancellor said that he was sorry that Mr Benjamin had left the House ; and ho was afraid he was the cauao of it in saying what he ought not to havo said. This incident happened shortly before Lord Selborno found it necessary, through indisposition, to abstain for a time from the labours of his office. KloptoraaniacE. Space will admit of our giving only one more extract: — . Once whon Mr Justice Byles was trying a prisoner for stealing, a medical witness was called, who said that in his opinion the accused was suffering from kleptomania, " and your lordship, of course, knows what that is." "Yes," said Bylea quietly, "it is what I am sent here to cure."

The French Navy.

The naval arsenals of Brest, Rochefort, and Toulon, are having a busy time at the present moment (December.) Instructions have been received at the two former ports to prepare for laying down the keels of two steel-built first-class cruisers, to be pro vided with barbette turrets. Their length is to be about 355 feet, by 42 feot beam, with a draft of i 7 feet aft, whilst their gross measurement is to be reckoned at 4,160 tons. Thß vessels—named the Dupuy de Lome at Brest, and the Jean Bart at Rochefort—ore to be each armed with four 16-centimetre (3-1-10 inch) guns ; six guns of nearly 3-inch ten revolver-cannon, and four torpedo tubes They are estimated to attain a speed of 19 knots,

Strange Advertisements.

"Betsy Jane " contributes the following to the "Manchester High School Maga zine :"— It is not to the advertisements in any newspapers or periodical that we should naturally turn for amusement, unless very hard up for something to read ; neverthe less, in tho midst of the vast desert which comprises the generality of advertisements, here and there are scattered somo cases which relieve by their "greenness" the monotony of tho dreary waste. Theao are never intentionally funny, if co their charm would vanish ; but it is the gravity and in nocence with which their authors convoy tho most astonishing impressions that pro duces such comical results. Here are some extraordinary losses : "A koyless lady's gold watch," "A greon lady's parasol," and "A brown silk gentle man's umbrella." If the advertisers really possessed such peculiarities, surely it would have beon better to keep tho knowledge of them to themselves and their friends. Tho author of the following must havo been inordinately dosirous of fame, without caring much whether it wero good or bad : " The advertiser, having made an advan tageous purchase, offers for sale, on very low terms, about six dozen of prime port wine, late the property of a gentleman 40 yeara of age, full in tho body, and with a high bouquet."

Some of the advertisers will probably bo disappointed, as their demands are bo un reasonable. Witness this :—" A lady desires to obtain a husband with a Roman nose, having strong religious tendencies." This next is not quite so preposterous :— " A draper wishes to meet with a young man who would tako an active intoreßt in a small trade and in a quiet family." Possibly tho draper may meet with what he wants, but that depends greatly on the family. _ A ohomiat, with moro honeaty than brains, modestly requests that "Tho gentleman who loft hia stomach for analysis will please call and get it, together with tho result." A Dissenter advertises for a young man to look after a horso of the Methodist per suasion. What crowds would apply for this situation, only to have tho chance of seeing such a wonderful animal! Perhaps even moro marvellous waa the decapitated dog whose body still trotted about inde pendently, for we bear that a gentleman has lost a white torrior excorit the head, which is black. Another horse is notable foritsjfastidioueneas : "To be sold, a splen did grey horse calculated for a chnrgor, or would carry a lady with a switch tail." Unless tho animal was oxtremoly discern ing an article might bo manufactured which wo'nld satisfy, hia whim ; otherwise ho must take tho proffered alternative.

In this instance somocunningia exorcised: "To bo sold cheap, a mail phaeton, tho proporty of a gentleman with a movable head as good as new." As in tho caae of iho Methodist horso, many will bo enticed into a view of the phaeton for the sake of boholding its ownor. A strange manner of travelling is sug gested by the following :—" To be sold, un Erurd grand piano, tho property of a lady about to travel in a walnut wood case with carved legs." A rather oxpensive convey ance, and on tho wholo not so comfoitable aB an ordinary railway carriage. Among men it is a common joko, though a very poor one, that women aro incorrigible talkers. It is surprising how much amuse ment thoy manage to draw from this assumption ; it is constantly cropping up, and however clumsily put seldom fails to produco a laugh ; it is a theme which nevor Srows old, nevor palls. Though it is abso lutely unwarrantable and unfounded, since it amuses them and does us no harm, it may bo suffered to go on ; but women should nover for a moment scorn te admit that it is a goneral truth, aa does tho governess who notifies that sho is " a perfect mistress of her own tongue." This is the way to help in ostabliahing the fallacy of woman's lo quacity. 'Ono pound reward'1 is offered to tho recovoror of a loat cameo brooch, represen ting Vonus and Adonis on tho Drumcondro Road about 10 o'clock on Tuesday morning. It must have beon a large brooch, apd of olaborato workmanship, to represent so much, and with such minutenoss. Tho subject, too, waa novel and remarkable. As a laat instance, we cite a notico of a different'nature. It sounds like a proclam ation of some Eastern, deapot in a fit of clemoncy, "Notice is hereby given, that, owing to tho latonosß of tho harvest, tho Marquis of Camden will not shoot himself j or any of his tenants, till the 14th of Sep tember."

Our Grandmothers.

Ik the "National Review" for November the Countess oi Jersey attempts to answer Mrs Lynn Linton's argument on the rosults of tho "Woman's Movement" by pointing out that our grandmothers and great-grand motbors were quite as emancipated as their descendants, and certainly were not moro *' domesticated." Clarlnda's Diary. Here, for instance, is an example from good Queen Anne's reign : — The lovo of ploasuro and the vacuous lives of the ladies of Pope's day aro nowhere better satirised than by Addison in "Clarinda's Journal of a Woek." It is too long to extract in its entirety, but Wed neaday may serve as a specimen : — From eight till ton.—Drank two dishes of chocolate in bed, and foil asleep after them. From ten to eleven.—Ate a slice of biead and-buttor, drank a dieh cf bokoa, and read tho " Spectator." Prom elevou to one. —At my toilette ; tried a new hood. Gave orders for Vony to bo .combed and washed. Mem : I look best in blue. From one till half anhour after two.— Drovo to the, Change Cheapened a couple of fans.

Till four.—At dinner. Mom. :Mr Froth passed by in his new livories. From four .to six.—Dressed ; paid a visit to old Lsdy Blithe and her sister, having beforo heard they wero gone out of town that day. From six to eleven.—At basset. Mem. : Never sot again upon the ace of diamonds. Swift's "Modern Lady," in 1728, riaea, like Belinda, in tho " Kapo of the Lock," at noon, spends her day in shopping, her even ing in scandal, and her night, till past four in the following morning, in losing largo sums at cards. In Horace Walpolc's Tlma. Wo need but to turn to Horace Walpolo to see that our ancestreeaea knew how to iimuse themselves a little later in the j century. What can be more lively than his supper at Vauxhall ? ■ Ho goes to Lady Caroline Petersham's liouae, and finds " her ond tho little Ashe, or the Pollard Ashe, as thoy call her ; they had just finished their last layer of rod, and looked as handsomo as crimaon could mako I them." Thoy pick up some good company in tho Mall; but though lady Caroline runs up to Lord Potersham with " a familiar spring," he stalks away "as sulky as a ghost that nobody will spaalc to first." | This do3s not appear to affect tho lady's spirits ; they 'get into thoir barge, with a boat of French horns attending, and littlo Ashe singing. At Vauxhall tho "very foolish Misa Spaire," who has never seen a duel, though she ia anxious for the fun, tries to get Lord March to fight one, but he laughs' out of it. "At last we assembled in our booth, Lady Caroline in tho front, with the vizor of hor hat erect, and looking gloriously jolly and handsome. She had fetched my brother Orford from the next box, whero he waa enjoying himself with, his petite partie, to help us to mince chickens. Wo minced seven chickens into a china dish, which Lady Caroline stewed over a lamp, with three pats of butter and a flagon of water, stirring, and rattling, and laughing, and wo every minute expecting to havo the diah fly about her oars. Sho had brought Betty, the fruit-girl, with hampers of strawberries and cherries from Roger's, and made her wait upon us, and then made her sup by us at a little table. The conversation was no leas lively than the whole transaction. In short, tho wholo air of our party was suffi cent, as you will easily imagine, to tako up the whole attention of the garden : so much that, from eleven o'clock till half an hour after one, we had the whole concourse round our booth ; at last they came into tbe little gardens of oach Booth on the sides of ours till Harry Vane took up a bumper and drank their healths, and was proceeding to treat tbem with still greater freedom. It was thrs9 o'clock before we got home."

MODERN ITALY.

Neglect of its Art and Historical Treasures.

In the November "North American Re view " Ouida says that " whatever may be the opinion of Europe as to the"political ad vantages accruing to it from the indepen dence of Italy, it must be mournfully con fessed that tho losses to art and to history through it are groater than any which could have been caused by centuries of neglect or long years of hostile occupation and devastating war. It is scarcely to bo measured, indeed, what these losses aro, so immense are they in their extent, so inces sant in their oxereise, so terrible in their irreparable infamy. No doubt it could never bo foreseen, never be imagined, by those who brought about aud permitted the consolidation of Italy into one kingdom, that the people, nominally free, would beccmo the abjoct slaves of a municipal despotism and of a barbarous civic greed. None of the enthusiasts for Italian inde pendence possessed that power of foresight which would havo told them that its issue would be tho daily destruction, by hordes of foreign workmen, of its treasures of art and ita landmarks of history. Yet there is no exaggeration in saying that there is nothing less than this.

"Italy cannot bo narrowed to tha petty bounds of a kingdom created yesterday ; she has bean tho mistress of all art, the muse and the priestess of all peoples. What aro the Italians doing with her . It is sicken ing to note and to record. Nothing can over givo back to tbe world what; day by day,municipal councillors having houses to sell, syndicates and companies merely look ing for spoliation and speculation, contrac tors who seize on land as a trooper seizes on a girl in a sacked town, aro all taking from the fairest and the most ancient cities and towns on earth. * * *

"I wholly fail to account, an any philosophic or psychological grounds, for the utter deadnoas of soul which has come upon tho Italians as a nation. Born with lovelinoss ot all kinds, natural and architec tural, around them, tho aesthetic sense should be as instinctive in them as their movements of limbs or lungs. Instead of this it is entirely gone cut of them. Thoy have no feeling for colour or sense of symmetry, and little or no sense of revor ance for the greatness and the gloriousness of the past." Of Rome, Ouida says : "The leaders of an invading and victorious army would havo been aahamed to cauae the havoc and the blasphemy which the Roman municipality havo carried out with Rhamoless callousness ; the indignant voice of Europe would have bidden a Suwarrow, a Napoleon, a Constable do Bourbon stay his hand had he dared to level with the dust the august monuments of which neither the majesty nor tho memo ries have power to daunt the impious hand of tho nineteenth century Edilizia." The Italians themselves are " insensible to the horror of their work, just as they are unconscious why yellow, blue and green chairs on a red carpet offend a dolieate taste. To whitewash frescoed walls; to make old monastries look brand new; to ecrnb peol and skin sculptured marbles ; to daub over beautiful arches and columns and tempera painting, mechanically reproduced in ono set pattern over and over again, over miles of stucco ; to outrage the past and vulgarise the present; to respect nothing ; to eet tho glaring seal of a despotic ond bourgeois odminiatration over all which ngea have mado lovely andreverent—all this they think an admirable and hygienic work, while they let human excrement be strewn broadcast ovor the fields and emptied into tho streets at midday under a boiling heat, aud sot the guards of their rivers to drive out with blows of the scabbard the poor child who would fain splash and bathe in them under canicular suns. The excuse of hygiene is only the parrot cry which covers tho passion for iconoclasts and destruction. To make their own mleressi while tho moment lasts ia the only desire ot the heart of all these civic councillors and engineers, architects and contractors, houeeownors and speculators. To petty personal purposes and sslfiah porßonal profits everything is sacrificed by the innumerable asscsari, consiglieri and sindttci by whom Italy is regarded as tho Turkish pashas regarded the Egyptian fellah.

The Story of Punch and Judy.

There is au account of one of Punch's representations in tho " Morning Chroniclo" for September 22, ISI3. The narrativo is as follows :—" Mr Punch, a gentleman of great personal attraction, is married to Misß Judy, by whom he has a lovely daugh'or, but to whom no name is given in this piece, the infant being too young to bo christened. In a fit of horrid and demoniac jealouey, Mr Punch, like a second Znluco, stranglos his beauteous off spring. Just as he has completed hiß dreadful purpose, Mrs Judy enters, wit nesses the brutal havoc, and exit scream ing ; she soon returns, however,' armed with a bludgeon, and applies it to her hus band's head, ' whifch to the wood returns a wooden sound.' Exasperated by jealousy and rage, Mr Punch at length seizes another bludgeon, soon vanquishes his already weakened foe, and lays hor prostrate at his feet; then seizing the murdered infant and the expiring mother, he flings them both out of the window into the street. The dead bodies having been found, polico officers enter tbe dwelling of Mr Punch, who flies for bis lifo, mouuts his stood, and the author, noglecting, like other groat poets, the confining unities of time and place, conveys his hero into Spain, whore, however, ho ia arrested by an oflicer of the terrible In quisition. Aftor enduring the moßt cruel tortures with incredible fortitude, Mr Punch, by means of a goldon key (a Leautif ul and novel allegory), opens his prison door and escapes. Tbe conclusion of the affecting story ia satirical, allegorical, and poetical. The heio is first overtaken by woarinees and laziness, in the shape of a black dog, whom ho tights and conquers ; disease, in tho disguise of a physician, noxt arreate him ; but Punch ' sees through the thin pretence,' and dismisses the doctor with a few derogatory kioks. Death at last visits the fugitive, but Punch lays about his skeleton carcase so lustily, and makes tho benes of his antagonist rattle so musically with a bastinado, that.

• DcaUi his death's blow then received.' Last of all comes tho Devil; first, under the appearance of a lovely female, but after warda in his own natural shape, to drag the offender to the infernal regions, in purga tory to expiate his dreadful crimes. Even this attempt fails, and Punch ia left triumphant over Doctors, Death and the Devil. The curtain falls amid tho shouts of tho conqueror, who, on his victorious staff, lifts on h'gh his vanquished foe "

Innovations havo from time to timo been introduced in Punch aod Judy exhibitions to meet the circumstances of the day. Fielding, it may bo remembered, complains in his "Tom Jonas" that inconsequence of the very great popularity of "The Pro voked Husband," a puppet thow witnessed by his hero included " tho lino and serious part" of the comedy just mentioned. He thon, through Tom Jonea, points out the inferiority of the old exhibition of Punch and his wife (who is erroneously called Joan, instead of Judy, for that haa been her name "from time whereof the memory of man runneth not to the contrary," as in lawyers' phraseology). Of course this gave great offence to tho " dancer of wires," who fancied that " people roie from his little drama as much improved as they could do from the great" Soon after tho Battle of the Nile, Nelson figured on Punch's boards, and ondeavourod to persuade Punch, as a brave fellow, to go on board the Victory, and assist to fight the French. " Come, Punch, my boy, I'll mako you a Captain or a Commodore, if you liko it." " But 1 don't liko it, I shall be drowned." " Never ' fear that. He that is born to bo hanged, you know, is sure not to be drowned !"

It is related that Sir Francis Burdett re ceived the honour of being introduced by Punch during one of the election campaigns at Westminster. Sir Francis was repre sented as kissing Judy and the child, and as soliciting Mr Punch for his vote " How aro you, Mr Punch 1 I hop 9 you will give mo your support." "Idon'tknow; askmy wife. I leave all those things to Mrs P." "That is very rfght. What do you say, Mra Judy ? Bless me ! what a sweet little child you have got; I wish mine were like it." " And so they may be, Sir Francis, for you are very like my husband—you have got such a beautiful long nose." " True, Mrs Judy ; but Lady B, is not like you (and kissing her). A sweet little infant indeed I I hope it has good health I" Judy, of course, secured a vote for Sir Francis.— " Home Chimes,"

A Fashionable Wedding in Melbourne.

Marriage of Sir Rupert Clarise.

An exceedingly large gathoring, including the most wealthy and aristocratic Victorian colonists, assembled at the Scots Church, Collins-street, Melbourne, to witness the solemnisation of the marriage between Mr Rupert F. A, Clarke, the eldest son and heir of Sir William Clarke, Bart., M.P., of Sunbury, Victoria, with Mies Amy Mary Cummings, eldi_t daughter of Mr Thomas Cummings, of Waratah, Toorak. The day was perfect, and it is probable the sun never shone more brightly on a hand somer or. happier bride or a prettier group of bridesmaids than on this occasion. In Toorak the even t evoked a widespread interest the respect entertained for the bride and her family and the popularity of the bridegroom being testified by the crowds which lined the road to Toorak, while the church and its approaches wero crowded with specta tors.

The ceremony was appointed for 2 o'clock, and long before that hour the church was basiegea by strangers anxious to gain ad mission ; but so many gueats being expected, only a small proportion were successful in their object. The bridegroom, accompanied by his best man, Mr Wilson Robertson, of Colado, arrived shortly before the time, pro ceeding at once to the vestry. The church decorationß exceeded anything hitherto attempted in Melbourne, and reminded one of a lovely conseivatory replete with the choicest of white flowers against a background of palms and ferns. From post to poet hung garlands of greenery studded with Christmas lilies, the same pretty decorations adorning many pillars of the church, filling the air with delicious perfume. This, together with the magnificent structural suitability of the church, combined to in crease the brilliant effect of the grand tableau produced by this charmingly effec tive wedding ceremony. The rite was per formed by the Rev. John Ewing, and bis assistant, the Rev. Cerrier, who was the offi ciating clergyman at the nuptials of the bride's parents. Shortly after 2 o'clock the marriage hymn, " Both Jesus was called and hisdisciplestothemarriage," was sung,atthe conclusion of which all eyes were turned to the handsome bride as she walked up the red-carpeted aisle leaning on the arm at her father, followed by a pretty bevy of bridesmaids. The bride, who was given away by ber father, wore a magnificent bridal toilette, compoaed of rich ivory satin duchesse, with a leng elegant train, the latter having a deep flounce of rich and rare old Honiton point lace. On one Bide was a panel of exquisite seed pearls and satin beads, finished with a cascade of the same priceless lace (which waa specially made in Exeter for the occasion to the order of Sir W. J. Clarke, as a gift to his future daughter-in-law), the lace beingcaugbtback with tiny spraysoforangeflowersthatrivailed nature in all but scent; tbe side finished with numberless long floats of ribbon ; the bodice, which was high-necked, was trimmed with narrow lace. She wore a superb reviere composed of 65 large-sized diamonds set in silver, the gift of Sir W. J. Clarke, Bart. On her head, was a small wreath of orange flowers, over which floated an illusion veil of unhemmed tulle, fastened at ono point with a magnificent star of diamonds, the gift of Lady Clarke, and a butterfly composed of diamonds, the gift of the bridegroom. On the other side tbe veil waa secured by a triple crescent of diamonds, the gift of the Messrs Chirnside, of Werribee. On her arm were four diamond bangles (one set), with unusually large-sized gems, being a present from the bride's uncle, Mr George dimming, of Mount Violet, Darlington. In ber hand ehe carried, in a holder of satin and lace, one of the most beautiful bouquets ever fabricated in Melbourne. The handsome bride and hor party of brides maids mado a charmingly picturesque group, standing under a perfectly shaped marriage bell, composed entirely of white marguerites. The four bridesmaids were the Misses Blanche and Ethel Clarke, sisters of the bridegroom and daughters of Sir William J. Clarke, Bart; Miss Chirnside, daughter of Mr Andrew Chirnside, of Werribee, and Miss Ernestine Stevenson, daughter of Mr Geo. Stevenson, of Toorak. Their dresses, which were much admired, were composed of soft Indienne zephyr silk, deep cream colour, panelled crystal beads, edged on either side with a cascade of duchesse point, draped with straw-like draperies of the same lovely soft silk, trimmed also with duchesse point lace. The bodices, which wero high-necked, were finished with Connaught collars of crystal, and all wore extremely pretty hats in the Rubens shape, softened with cloud like trimming of tulle and feathers. In their hands thoy carried exquisite and un common bouquets, composed of white lilies and maidenhair fern.

At the conclusion of the service the happy pair, bridesmaids, aud groomsman, together with Sir W. J.and Lady Clarke, Mr andMrß Cumming and Lord Deerhurst, passed into the vestry to .sign the registry. Shortly afterwards the newly married couple re turned to the church, passing down the aisle to the well-known strains of Mendelssohn's " Wadding March " to their carriage, fol lowed by ovor 360 guests, wbo were enter tained by Mr and Mrs T. Cummings at their residence, Waratah, Clendon Road, Toorak, where a garden-party was held. The guests were received in the ballroom, which was decorated with festoons and bas kets of flowers, presenting a most attractive appearance. The verandah, carpeted with baize, was ornamented with small flags. The enormous refreshment marquee found ita resting on the asphalted lawn-tennis court, the interior presenting a particu larly pleasing appearance, with its wreaths of flowers and evergreen tables, placed down both sides and one end, the space in the centre beinsr utilised by a large cake weighing 2601ba., being the finest piece or confectionery art even seen in Victoria. The cake was of 24 tiers, the bottom one being divided by a 3in, mirror, on which serenely floated little swing beats filled with liquids. The catering was under the superintendence of Mr Christie. During the afternoon Herr Plock's band was in attendance and discoursed sweet music.

At two o'clock Mr and Mrs Rupert Clarke left for Geelong, for Mount Violet, Darling ton, the residence of Mr George Cumming, where the happy pair purpose spending the first week of their honeymoon ; Mrs Rupert Clarke wearing a well-cut tailor dress, grey cloth vest and cuffs, and sapphire blue velvet hat trimmed with sapphire velvet, tan boots and gloves.

Post Card Proof.

Salisbury. Term., April 4,1883. GJT.VTS:—I was Alflioted with serious Kleiner and Urinary trouble for twelve years. After trying all tho doctors and patent medicines I could hear nf. I used two bottles of Hop Bitters and am perfectly oured. B. F. BOOTH. Washington, D.C., April S, 1883. To the Hop Bitters Co.: Sirs:—l write this as a token of the great aporeolation I have for your Bitters. 1 was alllloted with Inflammatory Rheumatism seven yearn, and no medicine seemed to do mo any good until I tried throe bottles of your Hop Bitters, and to my surprise I am as well to-day aa ever I was. 1 hopo you may have great suc cess in this great and valuable medicine. Any. one wishing to know more about my ouro, can learn by addressing me. K. M. WILLIAMS, 1103,18 th St. Prosecute the AwtndlcrsM If when you call for American Hop Bitten (see green twig of Hops mi, the white label and Dr. Soule's name blown in; the bottle}, tho ven dor hands out anything but American Hop Bitters, refuse it aud shun that vendor as you would a viper: and If be has taken your money for anything else. Indict him for the fraud and sue him for damages for yae swindle and we wIU pw you liberally for U*» oonvlotlqp.

Thoy were strolling along Queen-street the other night, he and she. Ho was a faint heart, she a fair lady. "How lovely the moon ia to-night," she murmured. " Glori ous," he replied. " There is a man in the moon, the story books Bay," she remarked. " How brilliant it is," he continued ; " what a splendid setting in the circlet of the sky." " A poem in silver," she whispered. "If it were yours, Miss Annie, what would you do with it?" he inquired, gazing upward in rapt enchantment. " I'd take the man out of it and put it right back again," she said, with unromantic energy. The young man caught convulsively at a tree box. ' What's the matter with me. he exclaimed. He was jealous of tbe man in the moon. She fixed him* No cards.

SELECTED POETRY.

OUR CHRISTMAS SERMON.

(Rev. E. Gulliver, M.A., Otahuhn, 1888.

Pemiless he spoke, this Christmas-tide, Of war and of tHe hero's part; He showed that peace would not nbido Where gre _. nnd pAsslon ruled tho heart. Peace and goodwill, forsooth, said ho. And Europs cue vast ar_ <5d camp. .When the voicaß of dlplomaoy i Re-echo load the martial tramp. A Russian scratched, beho'.d, yon Sad A Tartar ot the demon kind. Twofold tbe nature of mankind, God-like and bestial, both combined. Thus whilst; we now commemorate The birth ot Him, the Prince of Peaoe, Yet soldiers'dfodfl we celebrate— Man's love of war will never cease. And thou, Zealandia, though afar From contests for aupremaoy. The rolling thunder-notes for war Sound the loud call for chivalry ! God fend the blow, yet should it come, Up. men, fight as your fathers fought! Force must be met by force alone. For thus, our country, you Were bought. Keenly we listened—straiaing evory sense To oarch words—redolent with eloquence- Words of doep import at tbe present hour. When war-clouds gather and the prospects lower. The sermon ended—then we homeward turned. Inspired by thoughts sublime, and men's hearts burned To tread the path erstwhile the. fathers trod, By those who died for country, queen, and God. Otahuhu. E. G. Legeb Ekson,

A KING'S GIFT.

An old king sat in the summer boweC Of his palace by the sea, ■■ - Unburicd gods around him lay x He nevermore may see I Why was it thus? 1 need not tell. He loved his treasures passing well; But.thoy must go-and aadand lone He stands by the sido of his empty tlirona. And so day by day, and so night by night, He watch'd his trcasur'd lore; Fair pictures hung on his palace walls. He'll see now nevermore. Why was it thus? no need to toll, He loved the people true and well; And hi. gave to them for evermore The light of worlds and the works of lore. He saw old legends of the golden ago Smiling farewell to him; Old favourites of the far o .lands, And oft his eyes grow dim. Asa father parts with his children fair,' So his heart shall follow his treasures rare. And in visions by day and at night by dream He'll roam by the slaves where they have been. He shall hear the thrush, it shall sins hia praise, -■ When skies aro bright or dim; And tbe laverock in its sweetest lays Shall cirol its evening hymn; But the old king standing beside his throne Shall but think ofhis children past and gon». Yet in visions of joy, or in dreams of pain— Heshall clasp to his soul his own again I For his spirit shall wander to tho gods Who peopled his rare estate— And the thousands who love his gifts so fa. Shall crown him good and great. And in visions by day- in dreams by night, He'll see the world by his work made bgh£ For each loving heart shall his praises ring Who hath given his treasures like a long. W. R. Wills

LOVE LYRICS.

(Fbom the German op Schiller.! <

Was it not this mighty power that found us. In Love's blissful bonds eternal bound us. Linking thus our separate Uvea In one! Raphael,-with thee did bud and blossom Hopes ot perfect bliss within my bosom;— Bright abovo glowed Love's snpernal sunt Joyful! Joyful! lat last have found thee. Have from millions cast my arms around thee, And from millions, Raphael, thou art mine 'Midst contending forces that would sway ua— Atoms mingling In primeval chaos,— Evermore my heart would fly to thine! Must I not from out thine eyes, bright burning, Draw thoss rsys that, love for love returning. Tell my heart It only lives In thee? Earth seems fairer. Heaven's face Is clearer. Friendship's ties more lasting are and dearer. When thou deignest but to smile on mew Storms of life and heavy loads of sadness Change to bursts of singing and of gladness In Love's bosom, fanned by her soft breath; Bnt, impatient In my warm advances, Seek I not in thy divine soul-glances A lightning-flash to blast my hopes to death 1 Though I stood alone In all creation. Thy dear form, to my Imagination, *■ Even from stones ana rocky cli_s should fitart; My grief would speak In groans and anguished kisses; The echoes from the rocks and drear abysses. ijike words of sympathy, would cheer my heart! • * (From tbe German or Heine.) Be who for the first time loves. And loves in vain—a god is he; He who love? a second time. And loves in vain—a fool is he ! Loving t wloe, and loving vainly,: Such a ''.lly fool am I; Sun, moon, stars, at me are laughing And I laugh with them—and diel I went to the halls where my darling ' Had pligcted to me hor faith, .'And there, where ber tears bad fallen. Crawled serpents with polson-breatn Auokland. J. L. Kelly*

Humorous Paragraphs.

A strong man.—A shoplifter. *-' What commodity is always afforded aft cost?— The law. Why are crows the most sensible of birds ? (-Because they never complain without caws. Gold and silver are in these days the most prized and effective of all ldle-metals. i It is the last air on the hurdy-gurdy that gets the player's head broken. "Sing me," he said, "an earthquake: song, for I love to hear you shake." Theodore Hook, in describing a badly dressed dinner, observed that everything was sour but the vinegar. A wealthy reporter has been discovered.' The British Zoological Society are making preparations to catch him. The market reports show that " whisky is going up," The police reports show that it also keeps going down. We know a very ugly and penurious man who works in his own fields in the summer months to save the expense of a scarecrow. " There is something I have just dashed off," said the poet, as be knocked his would be son-in-law off tne front doorstep. A clergyman, in a recent sermon, ex horted his congregation to " vote as yon pray," and later on he advised them to "pray often."

We don't wish to deter anyhody from being polite, but we can't help observing that many a man has been a heavy loser through a civil action. My son, if you will wear tight boots there are three bad things thou wilt inevitably suffer—namely, a bad corn, a bad gait, and a bad temper. Do not be discouraged because yon dis cover that you are not a man of genius. Dr. Richardson declareethat genius is aform of epilepsy. The tradesman wbo does not advertise liberally has been very appropriately 'com pared to a man who has a lantern, bnt is too stingy to buy a candle. A visitor at Castle Garden, New York, asked, "Are all those immigrants Nor wegians?" "No, sir," said the officer, " a few of them are Swedehborgians." " Do you know who 1 am ?" said a police officer to a fellow whom he seized by the throat. " Not exactly, sir, but I reckon you are the malignant eollarer!" Three things a Man never gate Tired of Looking at—The sky—the sea—and woman's face. And why ?—Because they are never for two days together alike. Lecturer: " 1 will pause until that young man in the back of the hall stops whispering." Young Man (cordially): "Go right on; you are not bothering me." The home rule that is embodied in no latchkey and haying to carry your wife's ! breakfast to bed, is not the one that we are voting for every unanimously. "I don't believe it's any use, this vaccina tion," said a Yankee. " I had a child vac cinated, and ho-fell out of the window a week arter, and got killed." - , , "Pay me that six-and-eightpence you owe me, Mr Mulrooney," said a village attorney. "For what!" "For the opinion you had of me." " Faith, I never"had any opinion of you in my life." He sent two shilliugs for a lightning ear wig-killer, and received by return mail two blocks of wood, with directions printed oil them a3 follows : " Take this bldck. No. 1, in the right hand ; place the earwig pa No. 2, and press them together. Remove the 1 insect and proceed as before. "Do you know the prisoner, Mr Jones ?" "Yes, to the bone." WhatMs his char actet ?" Didn't know that he had any." "Does he live near yon ?" "So near that he has only spent five shillings for firewood .in eight yeara.''. _

THE AUCKLAND EVENING STAR, SATURDAY, JANUARY 8, 1887

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