RANDOM SHOTS.

[By Zamiel.]

Some write, a neighbour's name to lash; Some write—vain thought '.—for needful cash; Some write to please the country clash, And raise a din. For rue, an aim I never fash— I write for fun.

Necessity, that "mother of invention," has evidently taught our erstwhile slow going Government a wrinkle or two. They are short of funds, and the country is "roaring " out against their extravagance ; but the Treasury will soon be replenished, 'and the people convinced of the sincere #eal of the Government for retrenchment, if our rulers only keep on the path upon ■■which they have now entered. They have ;this week developed about the neatest advertising dodge I ever heard of, and '.evolved a method of creating wealth which ■is as potent as the bale-of-paper-and printing-press process of which colonists have heard so much. My readers are 'anxious to know the secret, so I will keep them in suspense no longer. Well, the richly mineralised vein that the Govern ment have struck is " The Ancbnt History of the Maori," by Mr John White, and the 'cheap advertisement dodge has been very neatly worked at the expense of the press of the colony. The ancient Maori, it would seem, was an indecent old wretch, who was not content with calling a spade a spade, but would insist upon calling it "a b> .shovel." The ancient Maori is fast be i,comi*ig extinct, however, and our paternal (Government, in order that his degenerate descendants shoul.i not sink so low as to .call a spade "an agricultural imple ment," resolved to have the terse .sayings of the ancient Maori pre ; served in book form, with a translation into jthe broad English vernacular for the benefit pi the pakena. So for some years Mr •'John White has, with patriotic devo bbion arid self-sacrifice (at a very hand some salary), been wading through oceans •of Maori muck and setting it all in ■order for the good of the succeeding gener ations. At last " the man with the muck ,'rake" got the first volume of the ancient i»Maori's sayings ready for the public, and [this week the Government printer issued it Ito the world. It is well to remember that i'lnbstpeople were supremely indifferent as to -what the ancient Maori said, or his manner of saying it, and there were few indeed who ipaid attention to the arduous labours of the man with the muck-rake, the people being Snore concerned in questions of the hour 'than in archaeological lore of any descrip tion.

[» And it is just here that the preternatural ,'cutenesg of the Government in advertising thefirsbfiveshillings'worthof muck becomes .apparent. They immediately sent a copy <jf the book to a friendly newspaper, and the friendly critic at once discovered that jfche literal translation of the ancient Maori's story of the creation was so grossly indecent as to be what the ordinary police court re porter would call "unfit for publication." J?he critic condemned the book, the Gov jernment professed to be only just mada aware of its character, and ordered that it should be withdrawn from circulation until jb had undergone a bowdlerising process. The agent of the Press As sociation sent a sensational message all Over . the colony, describing the fQbscene character of the work, advertising £fche fact that a large edition had been I printed to sell at the low price of five shill- SngS, but stating that the Government, out of respect to the public sense of decency, Ijhad withdrawn it from publication. The [result, wa§ as had doubtless been carefully There was an immediate and [extensive demand .for the book ; everybody [wanted a copy "just to see what the Go jVornment considered indecent; you know," 'and the next day a message was sent forth proclaiming that copies of the naughty book Jcouldbe had by applying to the Native' 'Minister. Pecfple who were formerly utterly indifferent to archselogical studies suddenly developed a devout interest in the ancient .Maori* and were consumed with a burning <Jesir6 to know exactly what; that long-dead individual had believed regarding the. /breation of woman ; and our paternal Go- Jvernment, although enforcing a very strin •gent law against the sale of indecent litera ture, agreed to stretch a point in order to "gratify the students of ancient lore, who I/wished to obtain a valuable and " meri torious " work. But only through the i Native Minister, if you please, gentlemen ; this too literal book must not be exposed in the bookseller's window. So the result of j&^se fcacKcs is that the whole edition is in a' fair way of being speedily disposed of ? and the Government neither pay a cent for ad vertising nor give a single commission to a Jjookseiler.

; ♦ «♦ • * « »v. * ♦ • « ! This little glimpse into ancient Maori history—(by tho way would not v myth ology " have more correctly expressed the idea?)—suggests several reflections. Is it not a strange coincidence that the anoient Maori, iike the ancient Greek, should have broken jforth into indecency in his so-called "sacred" records ? In the natural realm, and in the .supernatural, there are things which are considered " tapu," but for very different reasons. The supernatural is held to be sacred: the natural is called obscene or in [decent. The grey fathers of the world— ;Oreek or Hebrew, English or Hindoo—did ■riot recognise such fine distinctions, but 'apparently, like the ancient Maori, held all ,to be equally sacred;, and lam not sure jbut our rude forefathers were nearer the truth than we are. The modern Maori, I ■believe, Has a bad habit of using former : sacred expressions in common speech—a habit resulting, doubtless, from, the per nicious belief that " tapu " v could be im posed or removed at the will of the priest hood ; and hence the language employed with all deyoutness by the ancient Maori has come to be considered vulgar and coarse.

If these .expressions are now considered coarse in Maori, what will they be when translated literally into English ? lam glad to say that I have no desire to taste the forbidden fiuit which it is the privilege of the Hon. Mr Ballance to dispense to frail ; but I know sufficient of Maori nomenclature to be aware that the obscene : largely predominates in that sphere too. The Government have paved the way for a speedy sale of forthcoming volumes of the "fiistoi'y" by announcing that Mr White will explain the meaning oFthe Maori names of 'places, with all the ancient narratives connected therewith. What a rush there will be to see the literal English rendering, say, of "Tarawera" and "Urenui!" A Wellington correspondent puts the, case correctly when he says ib was a mistake to issue this " History " in a popular form. I agree with him ; it ought to nave been em bodied in a " blue " book. Bub our Govern ment as I have remarked, are impecunious, and they have hit upon a method of raising the windbeside which a State Bank of Issue k nowhere!

The rich and tempting quality of Mr Wendel's locally manufactured wines has bSen' receiving demonstration in our midst after a novel and unexpected fashion. When the Industrial Exhibition opened, Mr Wendel placed 26 bottles of wine, viz., 12 of red wine, 12 of quinine wine, and 2 of dry light wine, and also offered to leave a corkscrew so that visiting connoismlrs might tasbe' and see thab the tipple w*as go6d. The committee, however, while accep^hg 6he wine for oxhibibiori, rejected the rather suggestive" corkscrew, leaving it toh^anderst66dtealjflidy **ft "no sichj

pussons" as to lend countenance to in discriminate tippling under the rose. It turns out, however, that tho absence ot that generous and convivial corkscrew has been'fraught with disastrous consequences to the wine. It has been taking itself off in a manner that Dominie Samp son would term "prodigious." The " red wine" has been particularly deficient in " staying " power, 11 bottles of the round dozen having disappeared, and both bottles of the dry, light wine have already walked off. Of the dozen of quin nine wine, however, only two bottles have absconded. It is evidently not so popular for the purposes of throat irrigation. Mr Wendel's only consolation is that the attractions of his wine are irresistible. I am open to receive an " exhibit" myself. #** ♦ ♦ *

Pastor Spurgeon sometimes " drops into poetry"—the only " drop" in the way of in dulgence that the allows himself, as he is a strict teetotaller ; but I need scarcely say that he is not the author of the following lines,which a correspondent (" New Chum") informs me " were picked up on board a Thames steamer." I cannot say that I see the point of some ofjthe allusions, but I am content to let the effusion speak for itself. Here it is :—

THE BANANA MISSION.

I miise with deep contrition, On that sweet Banana Mission, And the many opportunities for flirting that i« brought, When the lady missionairy, Light and frisky as a fairy, Entranced me and enticed me to do things I didn't ought! For she told, with deep devotion, How she meant to cros3 the ocean, To labour in Bananaland, so many miles away, Where nabobs harum-scarum Lock their ladies in a harem Where with dolls and toys and ribbons they spend the livelong day. What a blessed time of meetings, Of farewells and of greetings, We had about the mission to the far Banana land. Each lady gave a shilling, But a " fiver " I was willing To give to send glad tidings to tho dear be nighted band. I know I could not see them, Those fair benighted heathen, To shake their hands with winning smile, and murmur " How de do I" But I practised—oh, so wary— On tho lady missionairy, And taught hor how to win tho hearts of maidon3 young and true. As we travelled on the steamer, I, like any foolish dreamer, Sat close to her and in soft accents lovely pictures traced; Oh, 'twas nice, but it was naughty, 'Twos a thing T didn't ought to; But girls, like opportunities, were made to bo embraced. Though my conscience was upbraidin' As I whispered to that maiden That love was heaven, and heaven was love, and love was all in all; Yet, like a gallant fellow, I spread my silk umbrella, To shield hor from the tempest and the rain, drops that might fall. I tremble to confess it, But hci* hand I dared to press it. And She ventured to return it with a most de cided squeeze; It was wicked, but delicious, And I hope you're not suspicious; If you are, you may condemn me, but don't tell my " pater," please. She is gone, and I am lonely: But I think, if I oould only Give another contribution and another mission start, I might feel again tho pleasure Of instructing, at my lcisuro, Another lady mission or on how to win the heart. «4* # # * ♦ ! • • Tell it not in Gath, and please don't let Mrs Z. know about it, but I went to church last Sunday; not intentionally, of course. It happened in this wise : —

Zamiel being in a meditative mood was strolling quietly along Pitt-street in the evening, when he. heard a strange sound close at hand. It seemed as though the Fisk Jubilee Singers had returned, and were holding a service. I paused and soon discovered that the singing was coming from the direction of a fashionable church close at hand. Being naturally fond of anything new, I promptly entered the sacred building, which was crowded. When I had fairly settled myself I was surprised, at first almost shocked, to behold on the platform what appeared to be a troupe of minstrels. I then gazed a little more intently and saw that I had sinned greviously in thinking that a detachment of Hugo's Minstrels had been engaged toassist at the services. It could be easily seen that the circle were differently dressed, especially the feminine portion, the main alteration being that the real dark ones were respectably dressed. But as the eingers were seated in a semi-circle on the platform, with a pleasant-faced gentleman as a centre piece, the Similarity was racher striking. Soon after I arrived this gentleman rose and said, "Shall we have another hymn ?" Immediately the corner woman of the semi-circle led off in a swinging style, and the remainder quickly joined in singing a hymn in the native tongue. The effect was pleasing, although novel. Shortadresseswereafterwards given by a couple of "brands plucked from the burning. ' They spoke with much fervour, and their remarks were translated by the attendant missionary. As this translation was already written out, and in the hands of the missionary, I could not help wonder ing whether that worthy gentleman wrote the address and the speaker learned it off afterwards. Perhaps it was my innate wickedness that made me suspect such a thing. * * *. * #

Next an address was delivered by the missionary himself. It was very interest ing, and contained valuable information as to how the Gospel profession is worked in the Islands. For instance, in the matter of giving he pointed out how generously the natives gave to the church. At the island where he had been staying £2,400 had been raised in a twelvemonth, although the whole population of the island amounted to only 800 men, women and children. That, surely, is direct taxation with a vengeance—£3 10s per head all round. Naturally, I was much gratified when the worthy gentleman began to ex plain how the sum was raised. He said that they divided the island into four dis tricts, and a deacon went round and can vassed for the money. If a native died they also waited upon the relatives and received a gift from them. That, I suppose, would be considered as a kind of legacy duty. " But," said the kind old gentleman, " one of our greatest _ sources of gain are the gifts from the babies." It appeared that as each child is born the parents on the general giving day bring up the child and add a dollar or two to the offering. "And," added the gentleman, piously, "we pray the Lord to send them plenty of babies, you may be sure." It will be seen from this that from the cradle to the grave the same system of " voluntary contribu tions " is carried out. Undoubtedly these saA-ages are to be congratulated upon having received the salvation which is stated to be free to all without money and without price. Another hymn finished the service, and " Zamiel" went homewards meditating up'ori the many sacrifices made by the devoted missionary for the good of the work?

Had the "Eight Hours Mill" been in full operation I should have inclined to the belief that the 'orny-'anded had been patronising it to show their approval of the principle, and had then gone with their supplies of flour to impress upon Mr Withy the blessings of a protective policy. Bub as the Eight Hours Mill is still unfinished,, and as the Newton people complain of hard times and short "tick" at the grocer's, I am forced back upon another theory to account for the superabundance of flour displayed at Mr Withy's meeting on Monday evening last. I am as sured that during last week the Charitable Aid Board distributed three tons of flour as "rations" to the starving poor of Newton and Archhill, who accepted the booh somewhat grudgingly, as they would have preferred it in the shape of hard coin —nob so hard, however, but it could have been " melted" at the nearest " pub "—for the afflicted paupers of this district prefer to take " liquid food " ; poor things ! they are so much reduced by famine that they can't stand solids ! But with praiseworthy cheerfulness amid their depressing surround ings they resolved to make the besbof a bad job, and determined to have a " rise " out of somebody with the flour, instead of converting it into very depressing "dam per." Mr Withy's meeting supplied the desired opportunity; two tons. of the charity flour were thrown about in small bags, both inside and outside of the meeting place ; for a time the vicinity of St. George's Hall looked like a solid section of the "Floury Land;" and the Archhill Chinkies were quite elated at the sight of a piece of their beloved home. This, as I havo said, is only theory ; but if it isn't as good a " working hypothesis" as the Darwinian doctrine of evolution, you may call me a Freetrader, an atheist and a Greyite right away.

Some people have a funny idea of how to magnify their calling, and I am sorry that theso funny folks embrace some Auckland journalists. Like many others, I was astonished last week to read in a " Herald" leading article a suggestion to the effect that H. M. Stanley was circulating stories of his own death in order to keep up the in terest in his African expedition. That was bad enough ; bub this week the morning paper has surpassed itsolf in tactics known as " fouling one's own nest." An article on the Bray Vas lantern that appeared some months ago in the Star is quoted from by Mr Justice Gillies, and an anonymous but " eminent scientist" is allowed to make the following comment upon it: —" Are your New Zealand papers above suspicion ? This looks as though the agent of the Bray Company in Now Zealand had sent a £10 note to a relative of the writer or editor !" It seems to me that a newspaper which will allow such a disgraceful imputation to be cast upon the press, without making an in dignant protest, as good as confesses that it looks upon the offence-charged as a venal one. Well, I know a little about news paper men, and am free to admit that they are nob all Sunday-school teachers and V.M.C.A. habitues; bub in general they have a strict regard for truth, and are ab solutely above being bribed. If there are —as I fear there must be —some presShien in Auckland who do not answer to this de scription, I am happy to say that they are not included in my list of acquaintances.

There must have been a touch of unsus pected biliousness about me when I wrote last week, for I find that my remarks have given serious offence in certain quarters. First of all, I learn that the local fraternity of iEsculapius are up in arms against me for what I said on tho subject of the Sydney quack doctors, and the motives that inspire the regular dustmen of the profession in trying to suppress these gentry. lam sorry for any Auckland doctors who fitted the cap to themselves ; but even at the risk of getting short shrift at their hands I cannot retract a single word that I said. Then I have received from the Editor of the Star notes of a vigorous discourse on the antiquity, beau ty, and utility of thebagpipes, delivered in the sanctum sanctorum by Mr Simon Fraser, interlarded with free ex pressions of opinion to the effect that the man who cannot appreciate ■ the pipes " knows nothing, is not to be trusted, and was probably born in * coal-pib. Shak spere makes one of his characters say some thing tothesame effectabout" the man that hath no music in himself, and is not moved by concord of sweob sounds ;" but I scar cely think the divine William had the bag pipes in view when he wrote. Mr Fraser is further reported to have expressed a desire to see "Zamiel" with a view to en lightening him with regard to an instru ment that is preferred above all others on the field of battle, and a species of music which would be preferred by any savage race before the most refined and high-class performances of the present day. Well, well; lam quite content to let the savages have the bagpipes to chime har moniously with their battle yells ; their music may soothe the savage breast, but it has an opposite effect on mine. I have im plored the editor on no account to let the enraged Burns Club piper know the par ticular coalpit in which I am hiding, lest he should come and give me a " blaw " that would make me think there had been an explosion of fiery gas in the mine. If Simon and the doctors would only lay their heads together and concoct a blue pill that would permanently cure biliousness, all might yet be well.

ATHLETIC NOTES.

(By Action.)

FOOTBAI.Ii.

It is such a long time since Auckland and the southern provinces met on the football field that with our scant means of gauging their respective merits we had begun to look upon them as something wonderful, and (a great many thought) altogether too good for Auckland. Now we have played them we find that they are not one whit better than ourselves, and that in a great many things we can give them points, though Canterbury did take the shine out of us in the kicking line. Otago could teach us nothing. It is very evident that Auckland is the only province, bar Taranaki, that goes in for the running game, and that has good runners, save Taiaroa, in Hawke's Bay. Though Taranaki did defeat Auckland, they only met a second-rate fifteen, and our backs noW are far s'uperibr to theirs. No province in the colony can boast five backs like Whiteside, Madigan, Elliott, Poland, and Conway, and I am certain that when we adopt the new scoring rules, which we must do. we will be quite as good in the kicking line. When that come 3 about we will also have to revise our style of playing forwards, and I expect next year to see " Reps " play ing without " wings."

It is years since Mr W. W. Robinson captained the Auckland players against Otago, at Ellerslie, when the game re sulted in a draw, and when Auckland met the Southerners on their own ground in '83 the result was the same, but Otago had beaten the first team that toured the colony in 1875, so our victory last Wednesday just equalises matters. I must say I was dis appointed with the play of "the visitors. With the exception of Thomson's, there was no brilliant individual play shown, though Keog-h and Fraser played passably, aiid there was a palpable lack of combina tion., Id 6 nob suppose Fraser ever' had so much work to do in a match" before, and if he had saved the tries obtained, he would be fib for a- New Zealand team, I expected

a lot from Bee, but I was mistaken m him. His play was very mediocre, his tackling sick, and his kicking poor. Things were betteramongtheforwardsjtheyplayedagood honest game, bub were over-matched by our men. Morris was about the best, while Gibson was splendid on the lineout. Turn ing to our men, I was rather disappointed with Conway. He did nob play so well as againsb Canterbury. He neglected White side, and his passing was very often erratic to a degree. Braund I give credit to tor stopping many a dangerous rush, but he held the ball too much. Whiteside ana Elliott were jusfc splendid, and divide first honours, bub the former came in for all the shepherding, and played with the hardest luck I have ever seen on a football field. Madigan "made the best of tho few shows he got, and once brought Auckland out of a ticklish position by a good run. Barlow should use his well-known kicking powers more. Lusk was a decided improvement on the previous week, and I was glad to gee he did not tackle his man by the neck. His run ning was not the thing for a full-back, but under the circumstances was excusable, so I will not say anything about it, while his place-kick deserved all the applause it got. Wooller played a rattling game, and showed what a really good man he is, while Arneil played better than he did against Canterbury. The way he smothered Thomson after the first twenty minutes was very good. Tim O'Connor played far and away the best forward game, shining in every line — dribbling, scrummaging, running, and on the line out. He played a better and more honest game than I can re member him doing. Stone justified his selecbion, doing good work, while Twiname was conspicuous. Keefe and Poland were always in the scrum, though they did nob shine in the open. The only fault I have to find with tho forwards is that they did not pack into the scrum quick enough when they had got past the ball; they seemed to prefer to wait for it to come to them.

Opinion seems to be very much divided in Christchurch in respect to the playing of the wing forwards, one party being for and one against. When the team returns to the City of the Plains the question will be fully discussed, as a motion is to be pro posed in the Union instructing the selector to pick wingmen against Otago.

I consider that it is the duty of every footballer to do his very best for his pro vince, to play when called upon to do so (if he is really able), and when playing, to work bis hardest. The action of the repre sentatives of the North Shore F.C., in refus ing to play for their province when picked, requires an explanation. The Kugby Union should take a firm stand in a case like this, and stamp out any insubordina tion ab once. If club jealousy is to interfere with the affairs' of the Union, and playeVs arrogate to themselves the functions of the Selection Committee, things will soon c6me to a pretty pass.

Joe Warbrick still keeps up his reputa tion, and he can still say that lie has never played in a beaten representative fifteen. It may be news to most of my readers that Whiteside holds the same position.

The game last Saturday between the Auckland 11. and Ponsonby 11. was a very interesting and exciting one. The blue and whites won by a bare two points. The Ponsonby had all of the best of the first spell, when Bruce had to retire hurt, and the blue and blacks played a man shorb for the remainder of the game. The Auck land had the best of the second spell, save in the last ten minutes.

After the Junior Cup matches are over a match is to be arranged between a team picked from the second fifteen's and One picked from the Clubs in the Junior Associa tion.

The following' remarks by Mr Arthur Budd, the famous English footballer, on the scoring rules of the Rugby game, will be found interesting by Auckland foot ballers. They are extracted from the Eng lish " Football Annual" for last season, published before the new scoring rules were adopted : - " It has long been the opinion that our present system (never played here —Actceon) which places the value of a single goal above any number of tries is indefen sible. We contend, and we believe our con tention is impregnable, that the final cause of the game is to discover which side are the better players. If a side which scores one goal to eight tries against them— and such cases occur every season — are recorded winners, is that object attained ? Emphatic ally no! . . . Wo think, then, that if three tries were made the equivalent of a goal, a fair value would bo rea lised, and an amply sufficient premium accorded to place-kicking. . . . Mr Kohler proposes that a goal scored from a try should count more than a dropped goal. This is a' proposition which we should always strenuously oppose, and which we trust will haver be sanctioned. The. effect of ifc w6uld clearly be to discount drop kicking, a result we should regard as almost calamitous. Drop-kicking is at once one of the most distinctive and scientific charac teristics of our game. It is an art which no one can become an adept at without per sonal aptitude and laborious practice, and, in nine cases out of ten, a dropped goal is a cleverer and more skilful bit of play than a run in. We must, however, remind our readers that the tendency of the modern style of play has been to depreciate drop kicking, and that with passing out to the wing three-quarters by the centre and the half-back a grfeat premium has been put on pace. In the old days, When one three quarter only was played, he found himself, as a rule, so hemmed in and with so little opportunity to start for a run that drop kicking was to him a sine qua non; to-day the wing three-quarter has as often as not the ball passed to him with a cleHr opening before him, and there are consequently notable instances of sprinters who, by fleet ness of foot and nothing else, have become useful members of a first-rate team. Un questionably, then, drop kicking has already been discounted in our modern game. Those like ourselves who saw what wonders Lennard Stokes (a famous back of the Black heath Club and a representative of England from 1875 to 1881.—Actseon) could do at drop-kicking, are of opinion that it is not nearly sufficiently practised at present, and in the name of our past traditions we appeal to Rugby football players hot to further dis count one of the chief elements of skill in their game."

ATHLETICS, ETC.

Mick Mbnnoch is entered foi" the Twelfth Sir Joseph Banks Handicap. It is l'&f yards handicap with al3 yard limifi. A. Trindel-, Tom Maldne, and Clarke of Mel bourne-, are scratch on the 13 yards mark, Monnoch has gob 3% yards off scratch,- while' Myers; the" American sprintel*, has half a yard off him. There are 379 entries for the Handicap.

The deciding contest for the Grccco- Roman championship of the world between Corinol- and Gannon took place in the Alex andra Theatre, Melbourne, on August 15th, which was crowded. The betting was slightly in favour of Gannon. Gannon won the first fall very quickly, and Connor the second and third in eight arid six Minutes respectively, thus winning the matqh. The actual time occupied in wrestling the three rounds was 15min. 21se'c. There was a lai'ge muster of police, but their services were not required.

A. C. Ausfcer, our Five Mile Bicycle Champion, competed in the Mile Champion ship of New South Wales on the 6th against C. Wood, W. Elliott, and T. P. Jenkins. He is described as riding well, but being out of condition, Wood won in 3inins. 11 sees., Auster being completely beaten off.

B. L. Gerrish, playing for Axminster againsfi Cfewk'erHe, made 50.ofltf of 5% fchefS wove two s>ndrie§,< arid- €h&6fhef ten m§a mads" d-ueM "

SPORTING.

RACING FIXTURES.

September 29 and 30.—Geraldino Racing Club's October 3 and i.— Hawke's Bay Jockey Club's

November 8 9, and 10.-Canterbury Jockey

Club's Sprinsr. . November 9 and 12.-Auckland Racing Club s Spring.

DATES OF PRINCIPAL AUSTRALIAN RACES.

Hawkesbury Guineas.—Sept. 8. Final pay ment, Sept 5. ■. , . Hawkesbury Handicap.—Sept. 10. Final pay ment, Sept. 9. , „ . A. J.C. Derby.—Sept. 17. Final payment, Sept.

Great Metropolitan Stakes.—Sept. 20. Final payment, Sept. 9. Caulflod Guineas.-Oct. 8. Final payment, October 4. _. , Caul Q eld Cup.—October 15. Final payment, October U. „„,-,., Victorian Derby.—October 29. Final payment, October 28. _. , Melbourne* Cup.—November 1. Final pay ment, October 23.

The A.B.C. Programme for Season 1887-8.

[By Hippona.]

The Auckland Racing Club programme for the forthcoming season is now before horse owners and the public, and a perusal of it shows: that a great many changes have been made on last season's bill-of-fare- As was fully anticipated, the Club have gone in for retrenchment, the amount of added money showing a falling off compared with last season of £900. The total amount to be given away at the four gatherings is £7,180, apportioned thus:-Spring Meet ing (extended to two days), £1,020; Summer, £3,840 ; Autumn, £1,670; Winter, £650. The first day of the Spring Meeting is set down for the Prince ot Wales' Birthday, 9th of November, and the events are identical with last year's excepting that the stakes of the, majority are reduced. The Webome Stakes suffers most, 50 soys. being chopped off, but the Prince of Wales Stakes remains as formerly, viz., 150 soys., and the distance 1£ miles. The " plums "on the second day of the meeting, Saturday, 12th November, are the City Handicap of 100 sovs.,li mile ; Spring Nursery Handicap of 60 soys., four furlongs ; and Spring Handicap of 60 soys., seven furlongs. The dates of the Summer Meeting, as usual, are Boxing Day, New Year's Day (Monday, 2nd of January), and the day following. Great changes have been effected in the programme of the two first days. The opening event is the Maiden "Plate of 80 soys., followed by the Great Northern Foal Stakes (for two-year-olds) of 300 soys. This takes the place of tlie Midsummer Stakes, which is transferred to the second day's bill of fare and the added money reduced to 150 sove. The Great' Northern Derby of 750 soys. is" the boil bouche of the card, and this is followed by the Hurdle Race of 100 soys. and Selling Race of 50 soys. The Racing Club Handicap comes next, the added money being cut down to 250 sovg., and the distance reduced to 1£ mile. In this event the winner of any handicap of the value of 150 soys., after declaration of the weight?, is penalised to carry 31b, of 300 soys, 51b extra. The Railway Plate of 80 soys., run under weight-for-age conditions, constitutes the first day's programme. The big event of the second day is the Auckland Cup. The added money has been lowered to 750 soys., to which is add?;d a sweepstakes of 10 soys. each ; the second horse to receive 150 kovs., and third horse 50 soys. out of the stakes. Nomina tions are due on Friday, 30th September. The winner of the Great Northern Derby, if handicapped below 7st 111b, will be called on to carry that weight. The winner of the Racing Club Handicap is penalised to carry 51b extra, or the winner of any handicap race of the value of 200 soys., after the declaration of the weights, to caiTy 31b extra ; of two such races 51b extra. The distance is the same as formerly, 2J miles. The other races are Midsummer Stakes of 150 soys., Handicap Hurdle Race of 100 soys., Selling Stakes of 50 soys., Ncwmai-ket Handicap of 100 soys., Selling Hurdle Race of 50 soys1, and Criterion Stakes of 80 soys. The third day's nialii Hits" several alterations, notably : A Novel Race of 50 soys; takes the place of the rich1 Sylvia Park Stakes (which has been struck out altogether), and the Auckland Plate, w.f.a., and Grand Stand Handicap have each had 50 soys. taken off. The added money of the Steeplechase remains as for merly at 300 soys. The Autumn Meeting is fixed for Easter Monday and Tuesday, 2nd and 3rd of April. The Easter Handicap has beian reduced from 300 govs. to 200 soys. and the Autumn Handicap lias been cut down to 150 soys. On the other hand, the Northern Champagne Stakes on the first day is increased to 300 soys., and the pro gramme for that day contains two other good stakes in the St Leger of 300 soys. arid Easter Handicap. The Winter Meeting is set down for Saturday, the 2nd of June. There are six events* the only alteration- of note from the laot amended programme of this gathering being1 that the Great North ern Steeplechase has had 50 soys. taken off it, bringing the added money down to 250 soys. With regard to future events, the Club have notseen fit to reduce either the Great Northern; Derby or Foal Stakes of 1889-90, both remaining respectively at 750 soys. and 300 soys. I think that the pro gramme, taken altogether, is an excellent one, and it appears to me well-arranged. Some exception has been taken to the trans ferring of the Auckland Cup to the second day, but several horse-owners whom I have conversed with' regard the change for the better, and the fact of the A.R.C. Handicap being reduced to 1J mile should have the effect of seeing a big field go to the post in Mure for that event. However much we may deprecate" the shortening? of distances, New Zealand racing clubs are compelled to do so to gratify horse-owners, who all cry out for " sprint" races. With the Great Northern Derby to be run on the first day, we may now look forward to the race being surrounded with more interest in future, and considering the rich prize it is, the A.R.C. are to be commended for bringing the race' more _ prominently before the eyes of turfites generally. Why subsidise a race with a large amount of added money and then relegate it to the back ground ? In conclusion, I hope the Racing Club will be rewarded by both horse-owners and the public fdr the first-class and exceedingly liberal programmes they have' placed before them for the 1887-8S season.

The following figures show the amount the Club have given in added money at the various meetings during, the past five seasons, and the amount proposed to be given during the forthcoming one :—

: . 1862-3 1883-4 1881-5 1885-6 188R 7 1887-8 Spring 400 515 570 680 780 1020 Summer . 2500 2750 3250 4150 470!) 3840 Autumn 1195 1310 1310 IGSO 18*0 1670 Winter — — 650 650 SftO 650

4005 4575 6820 7130 8,080 7,180

TURF GOSSIP.

[By Hippona,]

A' PEdMiNfiNT horse-owner in Auckland received a letter from Christchurch this week stating that owners down there will not nominate for the A.U.C. Meetings if the Club insists on Mr Evett's handicaps being passed through bhecommittee's hands before being issued. This is just as I anticipated. The f&ks is that the powers that; be cttine to ti<id h'sfejty & GOWeltisioil oves tiie Saittei?; arid wbea Ihe petition

from the local owners was presented they evidently never gave even & passing thought that the interests of owners outside of Auckland were to be studied. Mr Evett's greatest admirers will freely admit that he made several very bad handicaps last season, particularly at our Autumn Meet ing ; but where are we to find a man as competent to take the work ? Anyone who has had but a small amount of racing ex perience knows how some owners will grumble at handicappers, whether they are well treated or otherwise. The majority of horse-owners look upon it as their just privilege. Let the A.R.C. do one thing or the other. If they are not satisfied with Mr Evett, by all means get a new man, but not place him in the ridiculous and false posi tion of compelling his handicaps to go through a committee's hands. Whatever the A.R.C. Committee may see fit to do, they can rest assured that the " foreign" owners will not submit to the course at present proposed. I notice that the Canterbury weekly papers have taken the subject up, and express their condemnation of the Club with regard to the supervision of the handicapping at the hands of a committee. The writers, how ever, fall into error. It was never intended by the.AiR.C. that interested horse-owners should form part of. the committee, so that their ill-natured remarks on that score, to say the least, are impertinent and alto gether uncalled for* I am glad that the powers that be of the Auckland Racing Club did not cut down the distance of the Auckland Cup. It has always seemed to me that the feature of the race, from a spectator's point of view, was the fact that the start Was in front of the stand. Had the distance been reduced to two mites as suggested, this would of course have been a thing of the past.

Locket, the dam of Thunderbolt and Necklace, dropped a fine-looking colt foal to Nordenfeldt at Sylvia Park on Monday last. The little stranger is a chestnut in colour, with a white blaze down his face. Martini-Henry's full sister Elfin has the honour of producing the first foal to Nordenfeldt, she now having a filly running at her side as the result of the union. Like the rest of the racing clubs in this colony, the Dunedin Jockey Club have found it necessary to go in for retrenchment when preparing next season's programmes. The four meetings show a reduction in added money, compared with last season, of £755, and the Dunedin Cup has be<in re duced to VOOsovs. The Canterbury Jockey Club is now the only New Zealand racing ..institution that can boast of a "thousand pounder" on its programme.

Papera to hand this week contain full accounts of the doings on the training tracks. The rumour with regard to Niagara being amiss is contradicted, and "Augur" states that the son of Frailty is doing as well as his best friends could wish. Abercorn, it is stated, has also thrownoffhissoreriess. "Martindale,"whois credited with being one of the most reliable toufcs in Australia, thus chronicles the doings at feandwick in the "Town and Country Journal" of the 19th inst. :—The whole of the New Zealand horses were given useful work. Enfilade did.not go along 'as if he cared to exert himself, while Silver Prince ap peared to be anxious to go a trifle faster. To bunch Messrs Drake and Robinson's horses together, I should say that the pick of the lot would be Spade Guinea, The more I see of this mare the better I like her. Monaghan treated Rosebud and Soldier' 3 Wind to a strong once round, of which the mare had the advantage. If she only keeps well, her chance at Hawkesbury looks particularly good. Kingfish I did nob care for ; but I thought Sofella went particularly well in a strongly-run six furlongs with Sentence. The Australian Peer and Pea body were sent a full mile and a half. Peabody is a very nice mover, and should run forward in some of btir handicaps. Arsenal performed a good sound gallop, and appears1 to be very well. The Derby colts, Bowmonfc and Stamford, also did useful work. The sarrie may be said of the whole of Mr James White's string, which are now in charge of Tom Payten. He has been with the late Mr Fennelly since a lad. and a better one to fill the late popular trainer's place Mr White could not get. Cairo did good gound work, with a neck sweater on. At the present time Allsopp has Cairo very well; and nothing would pleaseme!better than to see the son of Goldsbrough and Thirza win the Melbourne Cup, for which his good-natured owner has backed him. But 1 doubt his ability to do so. The Victorian horse Dunlop, which arrived on Monday under Jack Nicholson's care, was also out for a canter. He looks well, though somewhat big.

The Pakuranga Hunt Club has taken a hew lease of life. Last Saturday* no less than 70 followed the hounds, including several ,ladies. During the run at Gwynne land, Waikato, last week, an unfortunate accident happened Volunteer, ridden by Napier Glassford. He got one of his hind legs in. the wire,.and broke it* which neces sitated his being shot. At the dinner in the evening, Mr Thomas Brown, respond ing to the toast of the members of the Paku ranga Hunt Club, said that the Waikato drags were better than the Auckland ones, in fact he had never seen better. He. was sorry to say they had had bad luck with the hounds, having lost fivo couples with •distemper. If he could have his own way, he would have the hounds all of one colour, and one size, and so that they would "pack "well.

Mr Percival this week issued the follow ing circular to the country racing clubs in the Auckland province : —" offic9 of the Auckland Racing Club, Durham - street East, August, 1887. Sir, —I beg to inform you that at our annual meeting held on ist^August, it was resolved : Ist. That the existing racing rules, under which we have been racing, be rescinded. 2nd. That the Metropolitan rules of New Zealand be adopted. 3rd. That rules 135, 136, 138, and 146 of the old rules be added to the code of Metropolitan rules. Under these rules it will be necessary to submit your programme to fche Committee of the Auck land Racing Club before publishing. A meeting of the Committee will be held on the first Wednesday in each month for pass ing programmes. The decisions arrived at by the different Metropolitan Clubs are published in the .' f Referee' for the guidance of country clubs. A copy of our new rules will be sent you as soon as printed for your guidance." The" Sydney "Town and Country Journal" of the 19th inSfc. gives the following quota tions $£ V.R.O. D^BBY. sto IV. Niagara < 6tol v. Cranbrook 5 to 1 v. Abercorn 10 to 1 v. Enfilade, MELBOURNE CUP. lCu io i v. SilVer £rince iOO to i V. Tr6nton 100 to 6v. TrMent Id to iv. Meteor • 100 to 5 v. Bravo 100 to 4 v. Cranbrook 100 to sv. Thunderbolt 100 to 3y. Algerian 100 to o v. Matador 100 to 3 v. Abner ICO to 5 v. Cairo 100 to 3 v. Affluent. I clip the following from the "Canter bury Times ":—Just now it seems probable that the establishment presided over by E. Cutts will present a very formidable front in the New Zealand Cup. Nelson, if ht» would undoubtedly be the pick of the whole handicap. Stonyhurst is going on so well, it seems quite on the cards that he will return to his three-year-old, form, and Fair Nell, as we have written before, is one of the most improved animals at Riccarton. Torrent has thickened out, and looks pounds better than he appeared last season, arid Oruchfield is certainly one of the use ful sort. Teredo was one of our earliest selections, and we have no reason to change our first opinion. Of Bronte we know nothing, except that he has wintered walls bub Lorraine is sure to be dangerous. We recently saw 30 66 10 kid about the stable s cßanee, find we fancy the taker has rather the beßb of tiifr w&ger*

The death of Mr M v "~"*v. never come personally i? *^ ffi Deceased snecifll),•? * with AucklS^^frW, success with ho raeß I& O chased here, S b^ v« trainer was so wellteJ 10 A^Jr was an Irishman by &>> 5? resident of this colonJS" HWff Mr Fsnnelly ; . and.if w« f "?" < results, Mr-White teuffffl^ happier choice. This wJ, haTei>ad(! nelly's first attempfa? Sif^ prepared Wanderer foV&>C was in that gentleman'siiSJoßl'l * I also Receipt" Sir 3SJF&?*.* which were all hunters, C£§Nfc meetings. He also prepX?^ I Want; and it ff£^« horse that his clerer aJf T^ 6 Payten, first joined^TSf J 6 ft the first horse of note wlX*^ was Chester, which was ffif9«fl line of \vitmers. In fact of' W traliahas turnedSC didatesas Mr FennelljT/^% the blue tod white SS fe*«4 lock arid trident hi S fk h.^ Stekestwice.andtheM?4^ Chester and Martini-Henrt vP^ byrnong Plates have■"-iSS* rfSrf "** crcditbythesr^yyo?^^ Stakes were won with Bargo, K«kM and Trident-and it is that only lately Mr Fehnelly dwffl besbho^hffi trained. Though>he won theoS?? politan Stakes with The PoiitlffSSS cra.fc, he bnlyotice sent oufthe«C the Sydney Gup. This wg.^fj. crat, in 1878. A host of other viS were scored by horses prepared snS supervision.. ' .77* "Sir Launcslot" interviewed fe rn. pants of Mr D.O'Brien's stable i-fc? backi and he thus gives hisiiajp^'i the most prominent Jnembers oflhete. —I was hardly prepaYed to find such jjk provemeht as I did in Sextantj andhi* I pearance should set his backers on Z terais with themselves. He h^po»i« till ho stands, I should say^ every: j 16 hands, andatthesameiWhehajfo nished and put on muscletill he Btriij^ day one of the handsomest1 horses in til colony. Of course he may not' be csj upon to measure strips with imr cfabfe) this season—Austrafiamay be his desft* tion, but, as far as 1 know, MrO'Briah not, up to the present time, decided 14 he shall emigrate. " Taking one censidw tion with another," I fancy: it &tj&i his stopping here. As regards the nMif merits of Sextant and Maxim over afelj course, I must admit that my prejujis are all in favour of Sextant, b'nt I am ami that I have really no valid groundsfctfe carding Maxim in his favour. Itrieme^ a matter of opinion—nothing more.fi aught we know, Gipsy Kin?, who ffsjik next eblt 1' tooked at, may. oe to tb task of lowering the colours of iie pa; He certainly was a good constant tm>js» old, and as I said in reviewing fc SI Cup handicap, with 7sb he seenis tome<U pick of the young horses engaged IM there is not the slightest reasofifljk shouldn't gett the Derby coarse* iijii ing fihe colt like he is well nptdWf weight, andi judging frotn the races Pn seen him run, h's is as game as i pebble,'mi comes at &c right end.

CONDENSED ITEMS.

Hortense is in work again at Fl^ii^ and doing well. Musk Rose has arrived safely iri.Tijsiiiii, arid is now located at Calsfcoek CoCb&nu't, the,dam of tliosfi fiite Navigator and trident, is hotinfwi season.;' Advices from Napier state that twit*; Zealand Cup candidate, Silence, tewiln ward in his preparation. . , A colt, by Ingomar—Sprite, ran Jiw, Irish Derby at Curragh on JuM JBfl,l^ failed to secure a place. '... i Mr Cooper, the owSer of Trentoo m Niagata, contemplates breaking fip J stud at the end of the Bandtfick Mm Meeting in April. . . ■~, .«■ A horse named Ginger, K. M* which once stood the wear 4&i »« P, work, trotted in England recently Sum in three hours 52 minutes ...,,*. The tfeV Zealand-bred CarnM, iff, dueer^Jeu d'Efeprit, tfa's recent «y« Melbourne for 18% the Hod. W. PeiW; being the1 purchaser., ...,«,-J DiTririg fifteen years 276 m g daughters of the ' gfc* B#Ag Hermit have won 508 races, repress a total value ol £295,306. , „ - ,j Last week's " Canterbury Tin* m\ that Nelson is still under si» »i after cantering a couple of flua Wednesday morning walked bite 1 have to thank Mr L. tt Sctaflgg copy of his1 handy little, waistcoat pj "Sorting Guide? It C tip***** useful information in small umi» ..^ The Agent broke down m ti«|, Steeplechase at the ChrisJcW* » Club meeting, and is noNvlMy ; to f his final retirement from Hie J^^ J Algerian, by Goldsbrough-^g^ said to be a good thing for « Cup. He is a five-year-old, noffl'tij Mr G. Osborne, and has fist law his name. „ . 1,,-if infill I* It is thought in papier tha the^. a bigger fiefi for the Haw^^ this y&* than on «%.^Sb Percy Martin has no less than ga rau for the event in his B£Wft j^S* From all accounts the Dunedm^o 0 mark has wonderfully i«tf said that if he gets on as veil» now, he will sho* a W&Mjfcm Canterbury Derby The committee of the NfPf^L A Club have decided to « % programme contains sevens £525 added money. jjinutadpo**" The youngsters which di P"^ of the recent Geelong Wg tb^' are said to have #«? SwSlyinL^^ ~^it; The ''Melbourne Sportsman thit season theVß.C.Blue^^ such an unusually open jg^ would be difficult at gP^ft** to indicate which is rewy for big money. ft rflDa»«*^2 The thoroughbred mare^ j^j aswwgttsss SSSSgtffg and dam pf Qmonde. - Tfi In Christchm-ch, there j^gi inquiries laSdCup, and 6. Fusillade has been sow OJ| ahdArtille.7 100^:^0, Pf' br firm afe 2to 1 for ff fch^ s t ft^g} „( it to 2 is the best oflerg^- fefrf %■ Cardigan v »f°s rifi g bft^fgjii* Sydney fche g sPg ingt *J. the recent Ne*«f'•"wtnnU**«f ''I hero of thb second daj, Handicap and the J«» byG'jS from Siffnora (inij>. a" m ,fc» W^ HaWkeslury .HWd.^ .^ Hit »^

THE AUCKLAND EVENING STAB, SATURDAY, AUGUST 27, 1887.

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