RANDOM SHOTS.

[Br Zamirt,.!

*™ Flo write, a neighbours natno to lash, ■ ■ ..,: wrluj- vainthoniflit!—fornmlftilcash, •»iiii.- writi) to nli:asi- the comiiry i-l.ish, Ami raise n ilin. r vi- io, »n aim I n"ver •"''l'— I writo for fun.

THE air is still thick with rumours of wars, an-1 in consequence Now Zealand, including this fair Auckland of ours, is alivo with martial preparations. Tho military spirit is pervading all clussos of tho community, from the University students to tho

veterans who have smelt powdor. Kve» "the smooth faced snub-nosed rogues" in tho city soft-goods warehouses are preparing to " leap from their counter and till" and strike, though it should bo with their yard sticks. Tho " goody-goody " young men of tho Y.M.O.A. have had thoir fear of con tamination mastered by thoir patriotism, and tho patricians of Parnell have con descended (metaphorically speaking) to take the Queen's shilling and don her uniform. Na>, more: tho ministers of the Gospel of Peace have begun to rave in most approved horoics from tho pulpit about the eacrod duty of smashing Somebody or other, and are invoking tho_ aid of the Cod of Battlos in tho cause ot Fatherland. Men are joining Volunteer corps by tho hundred to escapo service m the Militia—a somewhat craven proceeding, methinks, and one not in exact consonance With the bravo professions which aro frooly made. Amid tho crowd of excited pouplo —some panie-strickon and othors fovonshly beilicoso-thoro is ono who prosorvos his mnu froid, ono who has not «lost his hoad, and who seems in fact unduly wHe tioiw of keeping his hair on! I allude to the illustrious W. 0. Carrard, the only legitimate veteran of Auckland, who not"only does not join tho Veterans Corps, but condemns as fools and lunatics all who propose joining it. Any sensible man (meaning himself) who has been shot at or bayoneted, will not, ho thinks, "come for ward again to bo shot at fur "Ol'W'a' Ah, William Coorge, the sting hosin tho tail of your remark. To be shot at for a •' bob "a day and your grog is glory, but to otter yourself as a target "tor nothing is sheer lunacy ! " Zamiol has formerly explained his attitude on the important snbjoct of self defence against the Lussians, and it is somo comfort to him to know that he is not included in the " mad-brained (minings and lunatics " whose insane desire to be "shot without pay hiw aroused the righteous ire of \Y. (■!. G,

Seriously speaking, all this warlike twaddle is very like a child's crying, before it is hurt. " The Russian Fleet la little more than a figure of speech, and its power of inflicting damage in the face of ordinary watchfulness on tho part of Old England's =ea-do"3 is almost nil. Apropon of the crisis, a juvenile 7.. lias produced tho following on The Rushing Bare.

Thh is a wild hanimile what lives in .St. Pctor.ibur" and the boarders of Afgannys tand. It's princerple food is tallow dipps anrl trino ila, witch it conshooms by tho gallon. The Kushinp Bare is not ain«oP bare, but hop bare, for be v ulwTs on the hop. (I hop the reader sees tho jock.) The hop bare is Ins own Bruin. (Anuthor jenhle jock.) He hops to <rot into Afgannystand by means of soft sopo and strong lye. (The intelijunt printer will sco that jock.) The bare is a ku? tomt to lye all winter, and so he gets vow "OOd at lyin. But the British lyin is a diffmnt sort of beest. He will make tho bare paws and consider his position. The lyin is tho king oi beests, and tharebv honss B tale, and wen he wags his tale the bare is in danger of getting a hidinp. The Rush- In" Bare can lyo like a land agent of iorty hols-power. The bare is a big agent in tho land bi/.neas. Ho is a hud-shark and he can gobble up a whole continent most in cDntinently. I wood not be a Kush.ng Bare though I cood ; I wood rather be it Polar Bare what climes tho pole, for 1 oland you know is tho enemy of the Hushing Bare. If tlfc llufhing Bare cornea to New 7«iland we will coax 'ma with tallow candles and fat mutton. That k ijry the mutton is riz a poony the lb. \\ itch that I? awl I no about the Hushing Bare,

Talkin" of boars reruinds mo that a living RCientiut, Professor Gherko (who must be ■i Unssian by his name) has stalled k now theory of' tho development of the human species. Ho has proved to his own satisfaction that tho aborigines ot Amonca and the people of Northern Europe are descended from I '.ilar boars. Towards tho end of tho glacial period, ho argues these bears floated south on icebergs could not return, and were obliged to mako the best of their environment. They gradually shed their Alpino coats, adopt.Mgu lighter and more suitable fur, and desiring to keep at least one pair of feet dry, took to walking on their hind legs, till, in I he course of a few thousands of millions ot years, tho fore let" became arms, and tho bears mon. There is a true Darwinian touch about this which should mako tho theory most beautiful and conclusive to ardent evolu tionists. To particularise only a fow points of resemblance between mon and bears, has it never struck tho reader of the inordinate appetite of bears for whisky, their londncss of "sugar," their habit of growling when ■uicr r y, and their practico of "hugging - ihe latter being adopted chiefly by young me n of ursine proclivities towards tho female of their kind. Furthermore, a bear standing on its hind-leg« and waving its fore-paws excitedly bears a striking resem blance to the pooplo's William George on the "stump," airing a fresh grievance or denouncing " mad-brainodl gulpings. By Ursa Major! Professor Gherko may do ric'ht-and our immediate progenitors in tho scale of development may have been not monkeys, but bears ! Those of my readers who do not relish being classed with Polar bears will think I have pursued this topic white fur enough-worn it threadbare, in fact so I'U forbear for the present.

In Dunedin thero ha 3 been founded an TTnrlv History Society, whose members are attracted together for tho study of the «arlv history of Otago, and tho collection of old documents-printed and unprinted-re rating thereto. Wo are yory laudable obiocts, and one cannot but wish the Society aTuccoss equal to its deserts. It seems strange that in such a matter as this Dun el'n should be in front of Auckland, for here the first history of the colony was »ila In Auckland Province the work of colonisation began, and nearly every part «fig rich in associations of the original «tt>en ™A tMv varying fortunes «? doubt a gwat deal of interest ta taken here in a quiet way in I? Events of the "early days"— indeed the fact is conclusively proved by i?« nresent demand for old publications, whirhtho booksellers aro doing, their best ♦ »M«fv • but we yot want, a society for tho t0 foment of the work and the diffusion «^ed Sat the multiplication of soc.et.es v I fnistake, that thero are plenty; in exist tvith all varieties of aim and intention ; S think that there is room for one dealin" with the early history of this part i vr»J /Pftland It wants a few onergetic Irtnsto make a start, and in all proba bUttv a sufficient number of members would be quickly obtained with enthusiasm enough to make the thing progress and flourish. ■

Tn return to tho one alroady begun in Ota°o The members have held their first ? on fe»a,ionoiu the University Buildings, andthe affair passed oft with great fat. The principal drawback was the largo w of Deonle preaont. Among them IZ oouMStA representative array of "old identities," some of the original nlrXsno (i oubt who bmved the dangers S fortTyoa^ago, when Otago was virtually cut oIV from tho rest of tho world. M r Mac- Wirew ono of tho latter, gave a long but ancirew, u» bt mmm" over with 1854 it took him seventy (yes, three re- S say seventy) days Jo travel from Snnedin in order to atttend tho first S of tho first Parliament of Now Zea land The voyago was made in tho Govern ment brig Victoria, whkih was a rogukr cruiser (and " wind-jammer," one mentally adda). Dr. Hooko" f°lowod *. r t andrew, and his remarks, which dealt principally *>«' literiiry mi>«cr *. w«° equally interesting,

Among the euriositio.-! exliibitod at tho conversazione was v coi>y of tho first book printed in Now Zoulaml. It was tho Oospel of St. Luko, presumably in Maori, printed and bound at Paihia, Boy of Islands, in 4835 by Mr William Coleneo, who etui

survives and is a resident in Napier. It would bo interesting to know if there arc any copies of this publication in Auckland. But the graateft curiosity of all was one of tho charts published in Amsterdam undor Tasman's personal direction. This chart is t!io first one ever drawn which contains tho name "New Zealand," and despite thu fact that it is L»:!0 years old (tho date must be; 1055) tho present copy is fresh and clean in appearance. Dr. llockcn (who, by tho by, to bo tho chief stay and support of (!u< Society) was fortunato enough to obtain it when in England recently. It may bo interesting to note that the nan-.o "New Zealand" first appears, "as v record, on a piece of sculpturo, con sisting of two hemispheres representing a map of tho world, cut in stone by tho eminent sculptor, Anns ijueltiuii*, as an ombcllishmont lor tho new Stailt House, built in Amsterdam in 1648 by Van Kampon, to replace tho original House, burnt in llil-I."' The stone map, which formed tho pavement of tho Croat Hall, was obliterated by tho tread of many feet, and in IT"!! nothing remained of it. I take this information trom "Cumin's Index to the Laws of New Zealand," latest edition, whero fiirthor interesting details aro given.

In tlie sweet byaml-b'ye, of which wo read and sing so much, wo shall possibly learn who is really to blamo for the terrible crowding which occasionally takes placo on tho North Shore ferry tees. Ido not, how over, intend even to hazard a guess at this moment, but incline rather to have a sly shot at two very energetic director!) of tho D.S.F. Company, who usually arc to tho fora upon such occasions- -occasions when the sixponces arc rolling in by hundreds and visions of largo dividends aro brought vividly before tho eyes of tho shareholders. Sundays and weok days aliko I have scon theso two gontlomon buzzing around tho wharves collecting tickets, hustling tho crowd, and Hiving heaps of advico to both tho public ami to the skiptwrs (ill streams of perspiration were running down (heir countenances, and energy beamed forth from every movement, It was thus on Monday aftornoon, whew the sham light took place, and when everybody wanted to got homo by the tirst boat. Of course, a fciv were disappointed. While two or three thousand people, men, women, and children, were squeezing each other most terribly outside of tho barricade, the managing director wus struck by a brilliant idea, and, assisted by a large stall' of police mon, he allowed only ladies to pass until «ie of tho steamers was packed. It possibly did not occur to him in the Hurry of tho moment that most of tho ladies wore accom panied by gontlomen, and the amusing part of his arrangouient became obvious when the lodios wore landed here and they had to wait " cooling their heels " on tho Auckland wharf until joined by their husbands and sweethearts, who were prcvontod from com ing over for somo considerable timo by the crowding of tho boats which followed. However, there aro to bo more sham lights, and more crowding of steamors, and the Company's arrangements will no doubt bo improved upon as experience may suggest remedies for present deficiencies, and thus lessen the probability of serious accidents occurring.

It would appear as if tho evangelical propaganda were being advanced with un wonted vigour and by exceptional methods. I base tho assumption upon a course of pro cedure which an itinerant purveyor of tripe has laid down for himself and has been fol lowing very closely. His first care, of courso, is to push the sale of his nliment for tho grosser man, and this being done, ho invariably falls back upon a well-assorted stock of spiritual manna, in the form nt tracts and leaflets from the Koligious Tract Society. The modus operand/ v aft or tho following fashion: " Any tripu to-day, m;im ? Fresh and sweet, and cheaper than anything else in the market. No ! Then " (producing a tract from the recesses of his co«t-pocj<et, and presenting it w'lth n seductive smile) " perhaps you will do me the favour to accept this," Of course, the careful house wife can hardly refuse a tender so graciously made, and as a result the new method of tract distribution lias been found highly successful. After this we may ex pect to rcceivo similar favours from our evangelical butchers, milkmen, and bakon'. when thoy make their daily calls ; a tract on "Tho Wrath to Come" will very likely accompany the receipt for our disburse ments at drapers' and grocers', and tho barber may wind up his patter of small talk a.i he trims our beard, or clips our Mowing locks, by wrapping up our small chango in a "Call to tho Unconverted." Jt is evident that the systematic dissemination of evan gelical literature is as yot in tho swaddling ulothoa of infancy, but truly it is develop ing with surprising rapidity.

Fn the event of war being declared, tho Militia will bo called out at once, and it is right that everybody should understand that tho New Zealand Militia consists of all tho male inhabitants of tho colony between tho ages of 1" and 55 not oxprossly ex empted, who shall luno rosidod in the colony for tho period of six calendar months. " Zamiel " is certainly bstwecu thoso aged, but lie anil the other married mon may keep tlioir minds easy for a time, us thoy aro not to be called out until tho bachelors havo been slaughtered. Besides, there is quito a long category of " exemptions" from service, including all tho.su affected with lunacy, blindness, deafness, or any othor infirmity that may render them unlit for service. Doctors, clergymen, and schoolmasters are exompt as well as collogo professors, prison, asylum, and hospital attendants. Somo of theso exemptions aro rcasonablo; hut if teachers and professors aro not fair food for powder, surely printers and journalists havo equal claim to consideration—or rath r tho public interest demands that they should be allowed to ■pursue their avocation of sup plying tho latest intelligence and educating the populace in political and social iaoas. Then 1 find that all judges, members and oiiicors of the General Assembly, post masters, Customs officials, telegraph clerks, mail-carriers, shorills and constables arc exempt from Borvico. It scorns to mo that theso paid Government olliccrs aro the vory men who ought to fight in defence of tho colony, and tho whole of the burden ought not to bo cast upon the farmers, shop koopers, and working men. The sapient trainers of the Militia Act, in thoir zeal to exorapt themselves, required to ma-ko a show of oxompting all the executive ollicers of tho Government, and hence the ridiculous con clusion reached. If they had only oxomptcd Justices of the Poaco, tho acmo of absurdity would have been attained, but the line is drawn at " the great unpaid," and the guiding principle woidd thus seem to be that paid officials only should bo oxempt. Kather a contradiction to W. G. G.s doctrine.

To further tho wishes of tho dovornment with respect to the sham fight last Monday, His Worship the Mayoron Sunday morning sent letters to all the clergymon requesting that the intimation should be made from tho pulpits that day. Amongst those 'vho re ceived tho Mayor's circular was tho Rev. Mr Kunciman, tho Presbyterian clergyman of Poneo.iby. Now, Mr Kunciman is a hard-headed Scotchman, aud when ho coened thn letter, I imagine that he must ' iivo put l;he forofinger of his right hand jgainst t'/io side of his nose and winked a knowing wink. The thing was evidently a hoax, and ho was too old a bird to bo caught with chair. He cogitate! a little, however, and his strong logical mind showed that there was an inherent probability about tho communication, Being in n quondary as to what to do, he sought the advice of his Anglican brother, the Rev. Mr Calder, who had also received a circular. " Don't you think it i.s a hoax '!" queried Mr R. "No, I don't," replied Mr C. "How's that?" again queried Mr R. " Well," said Mr C., " the man who brought my circular is a rigid Presbyterian, knows the Confession ot Faith off by heart, and was never known to tell a lio. Besides, ho is a Scotchman, and his nationality renders the idea of his being mixed up in a joke absurd."

Tho other day tho City Inspector of Nuisances was nootly " chisolled " out of tho pleasure of obtaining a conviction for n broach of tho Dog Tax Act against a well-known oitizon—Bloggs, let us call him. His proper name is Albert Bloggs, but through a mistake the Christian namo uppoarod on tho summons as Alfred. Thoastntc Bloggs refused to accept the summons, and tho Inspector posted it olf back to his odico to lay a fresh informa tion. But Bloggs, camo down in a hansom and by the timo the panting oflicial reached t'io City Council otlicos, Blogga's dog, with a now collar round its neck, was gloafully wagging its tail. Bloggs smiled sardonically, and having triumphantly waved his receipt in Mr Goldie's face, whistled for Carlo and withdraw.

The absurdity of going to law for tho pur pose of evading the payment of a trivial bum of money was strikingly ex

ompirfirrl »£io other day. A local seedsman was supplied with a "domestic" from a local registry oif.ee, but she didn't exactly suit, and ho refusal to pay tho 2s (id fee demanded from him. The parties actually went to law over tho amount, and the magistrate held that as tho servant had boon supplied tho defendant was liable to pay tho too, even though he was not suited. Accordingly, he was nonipolled to pay tho L's (id besides the costs of tliu case.

"Z-imiel" has an idea on tho subject of harbour dofoncos. There are in Auckland at tho present timo yomo hundreds of tons of iron water pipes, and "Zami-jl's" idea is that tlieso should bo mounted on the coast from Tiritiri to North lload. If n Uussinn oruiser wcro io catch a glimpse of asboro bristling with these warlike tubes, whose yawning muzzles would perhaps promise certain death to any cruisor, she might bo pardoned for showing her heels in a very speedy retreat.

Tho shabbinoss displayed towards the Auckland visitors at tho recent sod-turning ceiomony was equalled several years ago when the construction of tho lino at tho Thames was about to bo commenced. In vitations wore issued by tho authorities to a number of citizons, but tho only gentle men who accepted were tho then Mayor, Mr Peacock, Mr Waddel, and another gentleman. The Hincmoa conveyed them to the scene of operations, and on tho way down tho party were entertained at break last. When the meal had concluded, Is (id was f-olloctcd from each of the guests to cover its costs ; ;.,., 4a Gd from the lot. It would thus appear that the Croy adminis trators wore not prodigal of their hospitality.

FIELD SPORTS AND AQUATICS.

(BY ACTION.!

In llio Four-Dared bout raco between Ihiuodin find lnvorcargill Iho former won by a length tun! v quartor. Lillywhlto thinks tlint Trumblo and Bruco, of Victoria, arc the two most pro mising cricketers in Australia. It is stated that tho Marylobone Club intend sending a team of amateur cricketers to Australia iuISSG,

It i- statod that tho East Christohurch Football Club intend sending throe toains toTiraam on May -'.I. It has been mon tioued that they will placo live lifteens iti tlH3tield this season.

It is rumoured that Taiaroa— mighty .fack—has joinod tho ChrUtchurch Club. With such an acquisition tho old Club should occupy a prominent position this season.

The glovo tight at Dunediu, on Wednes day evening, botwoon l'ottongell and Scott, rcutlted in favour of tho former, who had nn easy victory, Scott being beaton at every point. It is statod Mrs Annie Sullivan, wifo of .fohn L. Sullivan, has applied for a divorce on tho grounds of cruel and abusive treat ment and gross and confirmed habits of intoxication.

Ud Feb. '23, Charles Mitcholl, pugilist, defeated John F. Schole3, tlie best all-round athlete in Cauadiv, at tiio Rink, Toronto. Scholos is 41 years of age, stands sft ll.jiu in height, and weighed 12st olb. Mitchell weighed lOst 111b. Biaithwaito, of Wanganui, refuses to accept the chuMooge from ilcirLi ull'oriilL' him halt a miuuto in three milos. Ho pays the original offer made was to row three miles, giving him half a milo, or two minutes start.

Detinito arrangement.s havo at 10-^t been made for the long-deferred boxing match between Farntin and Foley. Tho match is to be decided on .luno 30, and is to take plaio in private, at a spot indicated by Poloy.

A match his boon mad; betweon J, Thomas, tho champion 12dt wrestler of Australia, and \V. Hudson, of Isew Zoa land. Tlio conditions aro tho bo^t of nine falls in the Cumberland stylo for .C~>o a-aido, and the match was to be decided in tho Lynuiim Hall, Melbourne, on April 11.

The Cricket Season 1881-85.

MisUKLI.AXKOI

Tho following is a list of the chiofscorers in New Zealand, recontly published by tho "Canterbury Times," ISSI-S.">. Strange, C—Banks v. Insurance Corn panins, March 17 220 Barton, \V. X —Auckland v. Auckland United. Ducomber 13 180 Yalta, n. J.- Auckland United v. Alpha l.vucklnnd), Novembur 1.1 .. .. 13S n-trto-i, VV", X.—Auckland v. Auckland United. March 7 TO Wilding, K-Lnncaatur l'nrk Twelve v. KiKlileonofUlub. October 1 .. .. IS2 Wrik'lit — .-Lyltclton Mulls v. L'lirisl cliiirch Mull's. Januarys .. .. 132t Aim in, T Carrisbroafc v. Excelsior, January 31 l-'lt Ooopor. N.—Wxcolsior v. Thirteen Ware houaiMiien, Ocloljor 2j Ml Ilarion, W. !«.--Auckland Club Ofienin;; Match, October t >-'O I.oncilcii. A.--Unlon Hunk v. liaiik of New Zealand. December 1 .. .. 1151 Porry, ('. Tiinuru Club Match, Novpin her I.". U3I 3tranj,'c. C. -Midland v. United, Novein \nt\ 11l Sniiih. T. -Hoys' lliprh Hclioul Match, Diiiicilin, February 11 10S WilriuiK. Fl.— Canterbury v. Auckland, January I 10,' i liarton, 11. o.—Auckland Second v, Auckluml United Soeoml. Dec. IS .. 100 Krit.li. VV.—CollotfO WnllinKlon v. Non dcscriptH, March 2,' i U7 Homer. J.-Midland b'econd v. AtlillnK toa Second. November 22 .. .. !):! Yatea, U. .f.-Unitcd v. Gordon (Auck liiii'l), NuvombcrS'i 01 liOnt,'itcn, A.—United v. liancustor I'firk, Kcltruary 8 8- UamilMin C—Union Ikmk v. Hank of Now Zenliiml. December I .. .Si Cool;«, P. H.—(■'•urriabrook V. Koslyn, Kov«mbor29 S8 liunkhiim. W —United v. Gordon (A uck lamu, NovoiuburK S3 lioodiiiKton. W.-Otntfo Association Match, February 14 8« Noabiit, —.—Alpha v. Auckland Second, November 'II Sti Kiniinan, K.—AcMinprton Third v. Ex celsior (Chriatclmrch), Octnbor 25 .. 88 Barton, W.K.—Auckland t. "Wellington, Januarys •-..■• •■_••,,•• is Uralilo, A.—Carnabrook V. Excelsior March? 33 Buchanan, J. T.—Midland v. Fifteen o( Addin(?ton, November 22 .. 82 I.onirdcn, A.—United v. Lancaster Park, November IS S2 Mctirogor. J.-Phmnix v. Kxeolsior (l)unodin). November 2!l .. .. S2 t Not Out. Scorors of 50 runs and over in all Inter provincial matches, on I Senior Cup matches in Canterbury: - Strange, C—Midland V, United. Nn vombcr 1 11l VVildintr !<\—Canterbury t. Auckland, lauuary 1.. .. - 163 worn; "•" A.—United v. Lanep.fitcrPart, ■•. ...-iiiiryS 'J2 i Ban-' VV. K.—Aurklir.d v. W'elllng : to i J.riiinry* 83 BuoVuinnn, J.T.-Midland v. Fifteen of Addinuton. V- vetnVr'JJ . .. S2 liOnßdcn, a. - U'llted v. Lancaster Park, November P 82 Cott'M-ill W. i.- Canterbury v. Otago, Deoomber 27 lit Soorutan, H. H.—Canterbury v. Auck land, January 3 72 jlanu'in, K. I).—United, v. Ijancaßtor l'o.rk. November 22 ' 70 Milton, W. V.—United V. Arlington (l.'il, March 21 70 Ashby,, I).—Midland v. United, Jan uary 10 "5 StallorJ, C.ir.—Auckland v. Wellington, Januarys .. •■ -■ •• .. 03 Wilding, B'.—linncastet Park v. Mid land, December 20 C 2 Wlldtmr, P.—Lancaster Park V. Unitod, February 1» fi9 Cott;rill. w. J. —United v. Fifteen of Addinction, December li 57 Milton, T.V. V.-Canterbury v. Otago, February 20 57 Buohanan. J.T.—Midland v. Lancaster Parl;. Dbcc:nber 13 65 Moorehouse, JT.-A<Ulington v. United "ecembcr ,VJ s.">t Parker. W.—Otago v. Canterbury, Feb ruary 2i .. .. .. .. .. olt Firth W. — Wellington v. Nelson, March 7 51 Blacklock.R.—WelllßKton v. Aucklnnd. JcnnnryS fil Elacklock.R.— Wellington v. Aucklnnd, January 9 »0 Ashhy, D—Midland v. Lancaster Park, December C 50 Mathiaa, H. R.-Unitcd v. Adrlington, DccemborlG .. ".Ot Sal""in VV. J.-Wellinßton v. Nelson, March? .. •■ „ 50 f Not Out. NOTABLE BOWLING PERFORMANCES. A^lteKO of 3 runs per wicket and under. ~ a* » % 35 K. Turner, Addinßtou v. Lancaster Park .. .. 70 — 2 1 1 J. Whcatley. Midland v. United SO 7 4 3 1.1 E Turner, Addington V. Midland' f!8 8 S I 2 K. 'turner, Arlrlington v. Lancaster Park .. .. :i2 — fi 3 2 S McMurray, Afluinßton v. Midland.. .. .. ..65 113 5 2.3 S MeMumiy, Addinßton v. Lancaster Par!: .. ..70 ! 17 I! 2 '■> ]) IA-nch, .Auckland v. Ota«O 80 II 17 (! 2.5 D Ashby. Midland v. United 5:! 3 In I) :i J. Taylor. Lancaster v. United .. .. •■ ■• 45 212 4 3 Cooke on December 2i. look nine wickcta for Otni?o v. f.nnterlrary for C 8 runs. Mills took govm Caut-rlmry wickets for 37 runs out o£ a total of 31 ri ou January 5, Halley, for Addington v. Unitptl, December 13 took all tho wickets, one nmn al)3ent. Fairhurat did tho "hat trick" for United V Adding ton, December 20.

SPORTING.

PUIN'CIPAI, UACIN'O FIXTURIC3.

New Zealand. Mercury Hay Kfiocrf Mny '2' and 2J Tukapuna .).(;. Winter-.... May •_'•} N.Z. (irand National Sti-cpli-cliasi- M:iy'2j Diiiuxlin.l.r. Winter Jliuitins Mav'J:t. '!■'< WiiniMiiiii .I.C :-'ti.,■plech:is(> May tt> Auckland X.C- Sici'lilcclimm,- Mcetin:: ...luiii'l! llawke'sllay .I.e. Sleeiilichasea liine'-Ti Australia. South Australian J.O.(ni bIli>minßton)..Alny 2,7,9 Da,tcs of NonilniiUoiis, Entries anrt Acceptances. Nominations four principal events Taka puna.l. C. Winter MeoliiiK i'-lay S Nominations 11.-iwko'n Uny: St.■.■plcclii:ho..May 111 ; Accoptanc.es (Jivat Northern Htceplcchise midlluiillc* imcl Generalcnlrlon Junol To Corroßjionclcnts, W.u:i:i;,-Tlie Hon. .1. Whito mill 1,200 :;uinea-' (orNordL-ntoldt. M.N.P. (I'arnell).—The Homlwick rancoourso is mio mile anil a quarter in eireunu'trcucc, and '11 yards wide. Rkvoi.vkr.-Thunderbolt carried Sat "!b in the; KlyiiiK Stakci) on Kaster Monday. Houthir limd. who rode him. declared 21h over weight, Mni.noi'Ksi:.—Thorn were two Aunklami Cups run in 1577. On iho lal, .lanutiry (New Ycu-'s Day). Mr .1. Watts'st Arid. list. '.'ln. ridilcn by lirimnur. won. Danebury, 7sl. l()lh, Imini; TOcimd. ;md I •/.■.ink Wiiltoii. (W l-ilu. beiui.r third. Tim Hell.>, list Sib. aud-fh.: Don, Tat Tib, were the other manors. On ilinL'iiili IJc.'tHnbcr (Hoxlns Day). Mr V. Hnlion's l.ura. 7n' 71b, ridden by Caniiilioll, wasreturiiiid the winner. >Clsa. 7;-t lib. hem.;second, and Venus Transit. list i:!lb. third. Gillie CY.lluin. 751.1i1:.0 humed.

NOTES BY HIPPONA.

Thk I'akuianya limit C'liibintouilojioiiiii;; tlio season on the luhl Saturday in .lime. At tho aiiuiml meeting lust week, tlio mem burn unanimously agreed that a voto ol thanks bo a'-eovdod (o tkoso fanners whoso land the hounds have crossed during lust

season, several members oxprossing them solves to Ihu cil'eet Hiat tho aucocdh of the moots woro duo lo tho kindnosa in this respect, Tho bnltinco-Nhoct road ut tho meeting, I am glad to state, showed Hint the Cluli is now entirely out of dobt, and tlio sorvicoH of Mr T. l>roui\ wore recog nised by increasim.* his salary. Tho Wni kato members having applied for tlio uso of tlio honndfl from the 11 tit to the -'01 h .May, it was agreed to send them uji on curtain conditions. Tho South Australian .loekey Club Mcot in<; eommunces at Flotningfon Him after noon, when fho Goodwood Handicap will bo run oil. On Thursday next, tlio Adclaido Gup is set down for decision. By cahlo wo learn tho result of tho City and Suburban Handicap, uiu at tho Kpsom Spring Mooting on Wednesday lost. The winner turned up in Mr 11. K. Tidy's thrco - year - old colt, Bird of Freedom, who had the feather i weipht ot list 41b, Sir (ioorgo Ohotwynd'a MoMahoii (Tst 21b) being second, ami Mr C. Marston's Woodlark (list TH>) third. Bird of Freodoro was not by Thurengian Princo from \ itul.i, and last season was Ijy no incaiiH n bad porfonncr, having out of the throo races ho started for, placed two o his credit, while in tho other he ran second. I fail to see tlio winnor'n muiio among the Derby entries or tho othnr "classic" races to bo decided cm the Enpltah turf during tlio present season,

The Auckland Kacing Club, I under stand, have borrowed tiio necus»ary amount for tho erection of the new grand stand :»t Ellorslie. In tho courao of the next few weeks wo may, thoroforo, expert to hear of tlio tenders being called for.

Mr Robertson ban put tho yearling iUlor to Mitraillouso, owned by him, into French'*l hands, to tccoivo her early education. Tho brown filly by Musket Moonlight, and (ho chestnut colt by Antero; — Naiad, belonging to Mr R. C. (ireonwood, havo been ai'liod to Ucorgo Wright's string, All throo youngsters wore purchased nl tho New Zoa land Stud Company' s.ile in January last.

lam glad to'bo able to state that Tho Dauphin, who had his fetlock broken at the recent North Shore meeting, is progressing most favourably. The horn- is still in sliivs, but Mr liiilsteaiihopCM in tho noiiwo of the next couple of weeks that he will bo nblo to stand in his box without tho aid or a support, Mr V. Martin.-! mr.ro Mischief, who lifts been at Sylvia I'ark on a visit to Musket, was shipped to her owner at Napier a tVw days back. .Major U'almsley tolla me tlio daughter of Albany has every appearance of boinu stinted.

Mr .1. Leunard has named his yearling filly by Randwiok—Xantippo "Auriga."

Nolson and Wapiti, accompanied by tho yearling lilly by Apremont -Kate, recently purchased by Major George, arrived from ChrUtßhurch in tho early part of r!ic wi.i.k.

George Hope who recently eamo hen' from Wanganui. has been handling Mr J. Heunott's yearling colt, by Piscatorioua— Ynttorinn for several days past. I hoar that the youngster will be shipped to Sydney on Tuesday n(!\t along with Snuray.

When l.ho nominations for tho Wanifanui Derby of ISS7 were telegraphed bore, it wan stated that owing to Uicdiiy of clo.-tng being a holiday il. v.is pruhahlo;several unities hud not eomo to hand. Inono of tin: local papurs I notice the following havewinco been added to tho list :—Mr .1. W. .liidcnm'x b g by Totara-Beeswing : Mr 11, Wcslmacott's f by Looliuua Wai-iti; Mr 11. IJodwood's blk cby Leoliium Spritsiiil :Mr 11. Red wood's b c by Cudogan-Awatoa : Mr If. Redwood's b f by Kama P.ania—Amy; Mr .1. Marshall's be by Musket Titania.

I uoliicu in 11 Sydnoy papor that. Sir Mod red ih announced to stand tho season at Minimbiih. Tho fee is fixed at 15 •ruiuaoH, but only a limited number of mures will lio taken. •Sovrrul horses have bueii backed for tho Now Zimland Cup during tliu week (writos "ISoaoon") for greater or less amounU The greatest favourites appear to bo July and Trenton, who find infatuated backers eager to tako 10 to 1 about cithor liorso seven months boforo tlio rnco. I should not be particularly anxiou* to tako kucli ndda that cithor ono would start—lot alone win. Then Vanguard has boon backed for about £1,1101) at prices varying from 500 to ■10 to 100 to OJ, which tatter prico is now obtainable about, him. Mr Butler's colt, Hanlan. lias found supporters to tlicLunoof several hundreds to ~o to 1, while it in stilted that ho his been backed far the Cup mid I'erby to win £1,000 ; but. this must bo takon cum ijrano sidin. Captain Webster linda plenty of friends at 100 to G, and tho same figure is occasionally jottod down about Liverpool and Johnny Faulkner. Several other horses como in for a stray in vestment now and then, and among them may bo mentioned iko and Wapiti at 100 to 4 each.

in tho courso of an article on tho suecosa of tho prauont racing Boason,tho " Referee'1 in its leufiintr columns suggests that, ccn sidorinfj tha lar^o amount derived from the totalisator, tho principal Now Zealand r.icinf: dubs- shorn! combine together, and give £2,000 in added money to a raco wliicli should partake of tho naturo of an inter colonial contest. The writer of the article concludes :—Wo have offcon thought that a second-rate or third-rate Victorian horse would pay hia way in this colony through out a racing soason .'md we liavo often expected soino owner to make tho trip, and havo a out in for Bomo of our big prizes, and probably a race of tho kind we linvo mooted would quickly attract them. Wo would not eonfino tho raco to any ono district, but tho locale should change year by year, and tho clubs could share any profits in the ratio of their contributions, Wo feel sure there would bo a large entry for puch an event—provided, of course, owners found that there was something substantial to run for at a moderate cost— and that sportsmen from all parts of tho colony would Hock to witness tho decision of what we should propose to call the " Britain of the South Handicap."

One of the most interacting features in connection with tho A..1.C. Autumn 'Meet ing (says the " Sydney Sportsman ") was the extraordinary success of the well-known jockey Hale?, the followers of whom had a {Treat innings. If a speculator had invested .(.'lO upon each of his mounts during tho meeting he would, as the appended tablo will show, havo won £165. Tho name of each race in which he rode is givon boloi", and tho price* quoted are those at the fall of tho (lag. Tho table is as follows :— WINKING MOUNTS. PoginaW. Autumn Slakes, 7 to 2 £35 Kvall.l. Chimiimum.St/.kes.fito-l on.. .. 7 MiUTOtu-. Write-Hnnrtiiwp, 12 to 1.. .. I'JO Urallu. Foul Stakes, fitn 4 8 Kc"inai(! (.iiimhßvliiiid Stakes. 3to t.. S Mutvhloi-k. ynvr,ciTil-1"(lk-iip, Sto 1 .. 50 Kosiiiold, A..1 C'.Plate,fito lon .. .. 7 £235 T.OMINr; MOUNTS. Tromando, St. LfiRT £'0 llascotte, TrialShikos '" lieginaH, Hydney Cup 10 Monte ChrUto. I'iwliir.pSt.iUcg .. .. 10 Masootto, Flying Kanrticnp in Magcotte, Donciister Hanrlican 10 .'Gi Amounts won 5%5

At tho Tinwald races in Canterbury several ilnyu b u-lc, a ylai in<; case of pulling uccnrrcd in diofciolling Huck Haco. Brown Boy, riddon by B, Koss (who boforo start ing, was shouting for a cigar to smolio on tlio way), liept; in tho rear hard held till rounding tho turn iulo tho homo strn.i'rhfe, when tho horso made a dttennincd effort to ;;e1 away, and Iho jockey lilK^ed at him and nearly brought him c,\i his haunches. Nolwitlmtandiiij,' this peculiar treatment, Drown i'oy persisted in coming! in second, and tho joi-koy was received with a perfect storm of liissss and hooting. A moetiug of tho jtoivavdn wan itnmediatoly held, and Ross was disqualified for over, Tho stewards, also declared nil wafers Oil tho raco oil', and tho tntnlisator money was re turned to tho investors., less tho commission.

A Nelson correspondent informs "Sir Latmrelot" that Mr.l. A. I larloy has sold his tuo year-old colt Alpine Kcwe to Mr H. llcdu'oud fur Mi:.") (;uinotw. Mr Harley pur olm.-cil tho colt from Mr lied wood when a yearling tor 100 guineas. A Ch'ristchureii paper states that Mr W. Woston li:h purchased tho North Island steeplechaser, Blank Doctor, from T. Sheenan, and intends io hunt him this sea-ioii with tho Christchiirch hounds.

W'oiffhtx for (ho Wanganui Stoojilochiwo are dun on I'Yidny n«xt.

.Mr .1. Kiilinnin's Snider (full brother to Uio defunct Krilp|i) li.-w been added t" tho link.

Cinderella, who won tho Maiden Mutant tho I'apakura Meotinjr, is a duuKlitor of .lavelin anil Uon|;a, and was bred by Ml" A. McDonald. She was purchased at Napier in .March last.

The Inland liny Jockey Cliili(WolliiiKton) intend lioldinj; « mcothifj on the !)tb A lay. Tlu'i-u aro seven i vents, the stakes amount ing to C-100. Writes "Warrior," (ho VnstrnliaiicoiTOS pondonl of the Otaj-'o " Witness ":—^arf?o has ;.'ono amiss again, ami 1 siifipo.se, liko the rest of (ha Hon. .lames White's three yoiir-uldd, will never ho brought lit to tho |nwb to run for any man's uionoy. 1 can t malco out how it ix that this twoycar-old performers f/o so'often crooked beforo buinjj; rallod upon to raoo in any im portant three yuar-old race. Can it be the triiinor'x laulUhat sucli catUe as Sogenlioo, MontnouUi, N'arina, lOlna, ijupnliiro, and Martini-Ilonry can never last till they aro four-yoar-oldsV If the lion, .lamo.s White followed the examplo of tho Hon. W. I'tartiou, and scattered his horses ainotif: two or tlireo lirst-cluss traineis, wo should soon hear ol him having horsc-i of tho Stamp of Chcstui- and Morpeth-Melbourne and Australian Cup winners. When tiio liixt n.uiiod homo won tho Cup. Mr Whito had him in Mr UeMc'tro's stable, Tho same writer adds : -Should the favourite, Moon ahue, run nowhere in tlio Sydney Cup, yon may depend upon it " ho is not on tho job," but reserved for soinuLhin^moio substantial a Catliiiold or a Melbourne Cup —lor he is tlio making of a tirat-ciaHH "joor.

THE WATERLOO CUP.

(ll:oM Ol'H LOMIIOS CIiKKI.: I'OM'KNT.)

Tm; " Derby of (lie Lca-h," as enthusiastic coursing men term Iho Waterloo Cup, attracted but: littlo attention this year. The ultendauco was small, and though nearly nil tho representative groyhoundfi of tho timo were engaged, comparatively littlo betting tui'k place. I'riur to tho draw (or rather on the night of tlio draw) last year's v.iri'iu', Mr Mayer's Mineral Water, was iiuulo lavourito at 10 to I ; other* fancied and backed to win sums varying from C-.',(j0.) to .t'a),uUo being Mi Crosses unueutun pup Olnmur, Mriiltul.-t unit '.-Uroontiuki 'be runner up lait year), Mr Gibson'* Cocklaw Dean (uini.or of the Waterloo Plate last year), Mr Uavuy s Gay City and Mr liibbert'sMiiH cii-ndynu. Thy lir.il round pi-oved fatal to both Mineral Water and tituentick, and in Iho second Cocklaw Dean was put out On Wednesday night Clamor wan a l'i:d hot favourite at !l to -, "ito 1 being laid against Miss Ulondyno, 10 to 1 a-ainst Mr Dent's Bit of Fashion, any odds against others. In the third round only lilllli outsiders sue cumuod, so that when tiio fourth round opened thus dogs loft in wero Bit of IVhion, K. Hallidny, Clamor, Skittles, Rillymomn1, Petrarch, Mi-s (ilomlync, and Clydo Whari Hit of Ka.-hion boat H. Hallidny ci-ily, nnd Mien t-lamor and

Skittles tried conchi-ione, long odd-' being laid on the former, A very close battle en sued, of which tho public thought Clamor had the bost. The judge, however, gave the verdict in favour of Skittles, to tho irn.-nt satisfaction of tho ring, who would have lost heavily had Mr t'rosso's nomina tion won the Cup. Uillymonoy beat Petrarch, nnd Mi-.- Glendyno beat Clyde Wharf. Of 1-ho final four now left in, Bit of Fashion, after a gruelling undo eided, boat Skittles, and Miss Clcndyno ran clean away from Kallymoney. i'oi ihe final coursoloujr odds woro offered o- Miss tilundyw- beating Kit of Fashion, hut the dogs being in tho sumo ownership and having both beau backed to win fourstaUos, it. wax resolved to divide. The Waterloo 1 'up t.£ '.S.-i therefore stands diudjd by Mr Dent's black and whilo bitch pup Hit of l<"ushion (by Paris- I'retty Nell), mid Mr llibhcrt's brindled bitch pup Miss G|.;ndvm)(by Paris -•Udy Clcmlyiic. Mr (iib.-onV Coeklaw dorm v.n "iho Waterloo Plate us early ;.- in '.SI, Mr Ciwso's. Che San running up, and tho W;.(or!oo Purse foil, I hunks i idler to luck than good cours ing, to MrUmlV Ma-don who, but, for .-in accident, would have been beaten by the runnorof Mr .Smith's Kansouse.

An Inland Sea in Africa.

Co.-.nMNnr.i; Lanpa* luff Paris for Africa in i-V-bniary to carry On the work of tho Into Col. [ioudiiiru, whoso project of forming a

■en in Iho desert of Sahara by admitting tho

waters of tlio Mediterranean !un at I racial considerable attention for three years past. There seems to bo some prospect that the enterprise may really bo carried out, This ia not a scheme for turning tho vast Saharan waste into an ocean, as many have supposed. That idea i.s impracticable, for there are more elovatcd plateaus than low-lying plains in tho Sahara. Tho lowest level Dr. Lenz found ill his rccont journey across tho western desert was -Ifl2 feet above the sea, and he had reason to think that tho lowest, levels of tho western Sahara do not fall under .'WO feet abovo tho sea.

Tliero exists, however, south of tho fertile portions of Tunfe and Algeria a chain cf desiccated lake basins, whosesnndyormuddy bottoms, considerably lower than the Medi terranean, stretch away southward to tho Tozour, It wiis Col. Rouduiro's plan to flood thcßO lake basins or Okotls by digging a ennui 150 miles long from the Gulf of Gabes, on tho east coast of Tunis, liy this means ho expected to turn about 0,000 square miles of tho Sahara into a navigable sea, convert a wide belt of territory around the PQitintO fertile lands, open a. waterway for French commerce fur into tiio country improve the climate of Tunis and Algeria, and nrnato a barrier against wild tribes from the Saharn.

Thorois little doubt that Col. I'oudaire's scheme is perfcctlo foasible, though opinions differ as to its utility. A committee appointed by tho French Government re ported that tho plan was practicable, and could bo advantageously executed. Tho late M. Ti<!<ov, the ex;ilo'ror of Tunis, fully agrees with Uoudaire's views. Tho Count do Lesscps and tho engineers who went over tho ground with him early in ISS3 approved the pro.icet. Ml Lfifßops 18 now one of its chief promotors. "Wo have no mountains totunnol or level," ho said a few weoks ago. "The project is perfectly feasible, and we will turn tho desert into a garden. Tlioso who oppose the project doubt that tho inland ocean would revolutionise tho climato of that part of tho Sahara, and believe the sea would bo likely to silt up with saline deposits on account of the rapid evaporation in so dry a climate. All seem to agree, however, that it would givo fertility to hundreds of thousands of acres. The promoters of the enterprise ask no assistance from the Treasury of France, but wish only to receive a concession of the bordering tracts, now a sandy waste, which they expect to reclaim. Commander Landas will first tnko sound ings in tho Gulf of Gabes and select tho most, favourable place for a harbour. He then expects to sink an artesian well for the purpose of supplying the workmen on the proposed canal with water.

& Very Learned Judge.—A village mag nate was discoursing about a follow-towns man's wife who had been convicted of stealing in a New York store, and sentenced to serve a term in the State prison. "What a singular case !" exclaimed one of tho listener.-. " A respectable woman yielding to such a temptation !" " Oh, you're mis taken about thnt Her record is anything but respsctable," said the magnate. She was recognised by the judge as a woman who had followed the profession of pocket picking for years under soveral and various nomde plumes."

THE GARDEN.

[By HoßTcra.J

Caloudar of Operations, May 2.

[HOHTUK ia willing to answer any nuerieß. Cor responiienta must K'Vn thnlr full names anil mlilrwsßS, thoiiKh not for pnblieation.l

TO CORRESPONDENTS.

Si:i:-Hi.oiji:hiNu (Amateur). —You could not havu a better time to sub-plough your ground for an orchard. Any tinio this mutitli will do, but tho oarlier the butter. You would bo butter to uso thrco horses in eiich pWugh no tia to obtain as i;roat rv dop'li as passible. snout, nine niches in depth ia all Unit you limy r ,|h;rt Lo rjijiiiin, iiica with tlio above powur, and should co9t»)Utlouvur;l2 per aero with tl:i! three lioraus. JJon't ininu a few Kliillm^a i xliv., to thai you koi the work well don.;. Vow best ))lan will be. to take v wall: throui;h tin; Auckland nurseries, see their mock for yourself, i.hen ueo your own judgment. Vink IiOKDKK (Grape). — There iv Htlll time to (lot. soil for nidkiiit? a vine border, but it would have bec-n better to h:iveobiuincd iltwa munUis ago. 'I'he lup spit of uny ijcod s ,'rmis luml if I 111) boat. When putting it m the bnrder, turn tint jjrastmiilo downwuriK }on iiinsl. nsri- H.ilt to kill the Blast.', esnueiiilly if there is twitch ;;rasi3 in It. The ellecl of th<- Milt will bo tfone before the early spring, when you may plant thi) vlnOH. Try ami Kfit a (iiiantlty of old limn, rubbish, mid larRH liunun to mix witli tho Hail. Aliout two foot six incliDM is docp onmiiib for mi! noil in the holder. Hen I hat tho border 3 H«]l drained boforo lillini; in tlio nail. If yi.u iirt" Koiiiß Io crow lor market, the late varieties will pay thiiliest. CXI.XXV (.Mi.).- You Blioilld havo haditeurlhed ui> hoiho limn »'ro, hut do it, tit once. Tlio eiirthiiur-up ia to innko it «ot white and i-rlßp in tho nlalk, or what, ia culled bleaching. X left in earth it would continue I'reon ia the BlulU, Hr.d would Vie mrinuy mid rank to cat. Tie tin; HinllcH upi'iirefuliy, not to:> t,i«lit, so as to give them room to awull. Glv« a nuod watonng, with liiiuicl manure, if possible, then draw looa-.j tuil about them. covonnK up Urn s,ta!U, leaving about Bix iiiclies of tlio leaves aliovo ground. About the mil of ihi.s month, ir they have inado any Krowth, repeat the earthing un uwiiin. The more Htalk you can cover up, [hoijrcatcr ijimntity of t;ool edible iiiiiltor you will Ket I'ioni your planta. Mahkkt GahuKN (Novice;.—Tho soil which you mention id a still'clay, and ianotauited for nmrket garden inn-poses. It costs too much to laoour, and, espccinlly us you havo had no previous experience in Krowiujf vcKetables, 1 do not think it would pay you. A market garden work rci|uiroa uoino considerable oxporience in order to miilco a good living ar, it. with kooil soil. Yiui are i|Uite riKht in Huyiun that Mill1 clay makes the best noil when broken in, bu« the labour and manure roquired while it iB j,'ettiiiK brokon in would run away wilhall the prollts. If you havii made up your mind in kg in for a market, (,'arden, try and a piece of noo<l. rich, friable 3oil which in natur ally well drained ; but don'r. attempt It on any cold, wot soil, or you will bo sum to mako a failure. I could not poet you up in what to k'row. You would need to study the seasons, and u-luii takes best in the markets, for your self.

Lawn.

Tins is tho bost month of the year to renovate lawns which hnvo got into a bad .stale No lawn can bo mown for a number of years without, getting into n poor condi tion. Near after year tho grass taken awuy withdraws tho substance ficm tho noil. When a lawn gets into this condition the gross becomes thin, poor, and feathery, weeds and rubbish get a hold, and instead of a nico carpet of grass, an unsightly con glomeration of rubbish springs up, Now, it is easy to tomedy this, at a slight cost of labour and money. Tho first proceed ing is to pot tho surfaco of tho lawn skinnod : only a flight paring- -sufficient to rlenr away weeds and rubbish -not deep enough tn kill or lift: any of the good grasses which may still bo in the "round. Tnko all the s l:immin<(a and wheel away to a convenient place to rot. Next get a fow barrow-loads of turf with good grues in it. Ki.»r instance, Kentucky blue grass unsworn capitally here. Cut the turfs up into small simarcs about three inches Miuaro, or smaller will do. Take and double these under tho surface on nil places, which are b/iio of glow, about a foot apart. Then get a few loads of (ho best Boil that you can procure-good kitchen garden coil will do ■ and spread tin's all over !ho Huriaco, working it up lino with tho rake : then sow eomo froth growi need all over the surface raUo and roll. Tlio grass m id will niiiku a good lawn by next sprint;, uiiiJ ilic sots which havu boon dibbled in will spread over tho mirf.icn in timn and mako a good lawn if attended to. Tho nbovo in only for lawns which have got into a very bad atato. Where lawns are only throwing a poor crop of gii**, it will be only neces sary to give thorn a plight top drawing of very rich soil, winking it will about tho roots of the grass, raking and rolling it heavily, This by uoxt reason will inako thii crass, grow thicker, and will givo a far better carpet of grass. To keop lawns in first class condition here, they should receive a slight tap dressing every year. Tho nceewary soil should bo got and Marked in aheap during tho summer, along with some good, well-rotted .stable manure. If such wore done, the mould would bo in splendid condition for spreading every autumn. Fig Culture. The common ediblo fig is supposed to be a native of Asia, but long ago became natu ralised in southern Europe, whoro tho fruit, boMi in its grccu and dried state, has for ninny centuries fonnod an important part of (ho food of the inhabitants, In this country it has beon cultivated only sparingly, nit hough it thrives well in tho north of Auckland, requiring an littlo or less care than any known fruit trco or shrub. Pro bably ono reason why tho lig has rocoivod let-H attention in Now Zealand than in Europe is that labour could be put to a mine profitable) uso in raising other kinds of fruits or crops which, when sent to mar ket, would not eomo into direct competi tion with imported articles of the same kind, as would bo tho caso with dried tigs. Soil and climate are doubtless all right with us, but tho incentivo may bo wanting foi raising moro tigs that) nro roquirod for homo u.-e. Fresh i-ipo tigs nro often soen in the markets of Auckland, although there are many persons in our citios who aro very fond (.f tliis fruit and would willingly pay a fair price for it. Tho lig tree usually boars two crops in a season, tho first appearing in early spring, and tho second late in summor. Tho first liga will often appear in spring boforo tho loaves havooxpandod, and from fruit buds or spurs formed tho previous season. This crop ofton docs not come to maturity Ik re, or if it doos it is only a fow figs, which are somotimes vory lino. It would bo tho second crop which could bo grown here to advantage Tho socoud crop should bo extensively thinned, as ofton trees hero aro allowed to carry far moro fruit than (hey can proporly mature The fruit is not procoded by flowers, as in tho apple, poar, and similar well-known fruits ; nevertheless tho fig tree blooms, but the flowers aro very minuto, and on the inside of the fruit, whore wo find tho seed when it is ripe. Fig trees may be raised from seod, but tho more general mode of propagation is from cut tings, layers, or suckors that spring up around the base of tho stems. Cuttings of strong, firm wood, taken off in the fall and kept in moist sand overwinter, grow readily when planted out in spring, Green wood cuttings may also bo taken off almost my time during tho summer, and if placed under a boll glass in a greenhouse, or under a glass in a hot-bed, they will usually striko root quite readily. But plants can now bo obtainod of florists and nurserymen so cheaply that few persons will think it worth whilo to commonco with soods or cuttings The accompanying oxtract is taken from tho " Cornhill Mngazine," and may givo some useful information to those who aro growing ji KH : —"Tho extremely odd. inside-out, topsy-turvy flowers of tho fig owe thtir fertilisation, howover, to a still more extra ordinary and complicated cross-relationship. Hardly anybody (excopta botanist) hay over seen a fig ilower, booauso it grows inside tho stalk instead of outside, and can only be observed by cutting it npon length wise. Tho fig in iti early youth, in fact, consists of a hollow branch, on whose innor surface a number of very small flowers cluster togother, and when they are ripo for fertilisation tho eye or hole ut the top opens to admit tho insect visitor. This visitor is tho lig wasp, who comes, not from other cultivated fig trees, but from a willow tree called tho caprifico, On this tree tho mother wasp first lays her eggs in tho inediblo fifjs, which thercforo svoil out into galls and become tho nurses of tho young wasp grubs. Whon the wasps are mature, they cat their way out of the wild fig whoro they wero born, and sot forth to lay their own eggs in turn, cithor in a brother caprifico or on its sister, a true Sg tree. Tho?o wasps which enter the wild 3gs of a caprilieo .succeed in carrying out their maternal purpose, and lay their eggs 5n the right spot for moro grubs to be duly developed. But those which happen to go nto a true fig merely fertilise tho flowers without laying their eggs, becauso Jie fisrs aro here so constituted that ! j ho.'O is no proper place for them to lay | J m. In other words, the truo fig is a culti- • rated wasp-proof caprifico. But as tho £ igs won't proporly swell without fertilisa- I ion, it becomes important to conciliate the *

attentions of the wasps, and for this reason tho [taltnn peacantv hung °>»"'! v -"i; |A'": '. the enpritiuo on the bougie 'i I'< '" ■.aic^i tig fees, at th'- i ■ •■ • ' ■'■ ■ ' that thoy are ready "to bo feri iiised, The Hasps as they emerge from their own homes enter the figs at onco, and there set the little hard .seeds on whosa impregnation tho pulpy part of the fig begins to swell. Tho fruit of iho eaprilico itself never come= to anything, an it hardens and withers on tlio tree, hut aiiieu the true figs aro dependent upon it; for pollen, it follows that if tho caprificos were ever to become extinct, the supply .of best olemc in layers would forthwith coaso cntivoly."

GOSSIP FROM STAGE AND STUDIO.

(By Euteepe.)

Fiwppo Ramahxom, 1!i« great Italian violicint, in just dead, n.^oil (SI.

Tlio Pollard Juveniles have loft for Lnuiicenton, having completed their round of this colony.

MM, Dumas and Merino havo in hand a French voniion of " Hamlet," which will bo shortly produced at t)ie ('o.nedie iVan^ttiee.

Mr Sala, as a lecturer, has failed to make any imprefseion in Melbourne, and it is doubted if iiin chances in the other Colonies will bu any hotter.

Miss Florence Marryat, wlm is locturing in tho United States, write* 20 pages of manuscript every day. Sho writes fluently, without making corrocMaiM.

l?y r'>o approaching doparturc of Miss Mary Hume from Diuicdin thut city loses cortuinly tho bust trained Koprwio resident there.

Jir Ccovgo Darrcll bus returned to Mblbourno by the Garonne. Jiia hand .still ciiuhos him much uncasinoss, and it will be somo time before ho plays again.

Mr lollard i« said to bo under engagement to appear shortly with a juvenile opera company at tho Savoy Theatre, London. '• Futinitza " in to bo the opening piece

M. Leon Caron, tho musical director of the late Melville Opera Company, and a first-ohws violinist, has got an opera com pany on tour in tho Northern Queensland ports.

(Ixhard, tho brilliant French actor, who is called by his admirers tho now Fechter, is about to undertako an English tour with Mrs Rose Saker, a sterling and well-known actress manager.

In a now American comic song just out a certain phaso of Y.inkoo humour is exemplified by a verse which rofera to the Queen of Shcbn on her way to " masli tho wisest man in Christendom."

Tho Dunning Opera Company are now in Brisbane, and their season has so far been successful. An " Uncle Tom's Cabin " com pany is preparing to follow tho opera com pany.

Mr T. B. Apploby, the well-known comedian of tlio Dunning Opora Company, has sustained an irreparablo loss by the death of his only daughter in Sydney on the "21st of March.

Mr Sims Reeves has had for onco to pay for tho luxury of hoarsene.se. He was sued on account of his inability to sing one night at Stratford, and a Middlesex jury eon domnod him to pay .l:"0 and costs.

Mips Genevievo Ward, nommonoes her farewell Amorican tour at San FrnnwVoo in September. Jlor manager there Mill be Mr \V. F. Morse, to whom .she has written insisting that a lirst-elase company shall bo engaged, Chang, Iho Oliincse (,'iant, has boon telling a St. I onis interviewer that ho intends to marry a rich lady of Kansas City, Mo., who is 6ft din tall, 'and ho add* that after marriage ho is x°' nX irlto tno te(v biHncsp. Miss Florence Warden, author of that vory successful story, "The Jlouse on tho Marsh," I ma adapted her work for tho stage, and is about Htartinj* oil'with it. on a pro vincial torn-. Minn Warden Ihui had nun- Hidcrnblo oxporionco uh an actrcsw. Mr U.K. Walton, tho Australian actor, who wax last in Auckland with tho " Voiith"i'aml " Lights o' London" Company has .just mado his lirrt appearance in Now York, at a bonctit performance. Ho was well received.

I'anipior has boon doinjj a lively business at Sandhurst, during tho holidays, and ha* hoisted "Tho Black Flan" over "Tho Green Lanoi of England" "All for Cola," with hopcn in "The Royal I'ardon," pro vided no ono turned " <juetn's Evideneo " against him.

Mr ,1. ('. Williamson w said to have arranged to purchase tho next tlirco plays by Sardou : ditto, ditto, of (ioorge 11, .Sinn; (lilbcrt and Hullivan's next, lUMOrtmcnt of topsy-tiuvicil operas : tho next play by Mr Henry Merman, part author of tlio "Silver King':" ditto, by Mr Henry A. .Innc.

Macdermott,tliogrcftlLoiidoii//i'wiw<//i/i/r, is Hinging a now song on tho tweniyfour o'eluck crazn, in the course of which hosup nosen that wo shall in (ho future bo risked to " Call at two-foot-six o'clock, to havo a live foot tea." Tho applicability of this is not. very apparent.

Mi^s Mary Anderson's rcviv.il of "The Hunchback" at tho Lyceum in another popular success, and her costumes as .lulia aro designated "a dream of lovelinessl" Mis.^ Anderson, as :i devout Catholic, would not play during Holy Week, and Mdmo, Modjoska filled her placo.

Mr Frank Weston, of \\ izard Oil famo, lias taken tho much-abused JJall of Scioncc in Molboui'llO and proposes to make it a popular placo of amusement. Jlo lias started with a Troubadour company. Tho entertainment is of tho usual minstrel pattern.

Lord I'larmoylo, now Earl Cairns, is .'•aid to havo boon sovoroly bitten by another foot light fairy on his visit to America. Miss Florence Girard is tho name of his new inamorata. It ia related, by-the-way, that Mr Henry Dixoy, a New York actor, nearly scared tho sensitive Garmoyle to death in a cn/'c, by protending thathe was a dymtaiter.

Tho ballet of " Messalina " at tho Eden Thoatrc, Paris, is doscribod as "rapturous" and " unapproachable." Tho reader is to imagino ,'iO) trained dancers, and as many as 1/200 gorgeous if somewhat scanty costumes, and then try to picture the effect of tho great scone of the triumph of Claudius.

Comic opera in London ia unmistakably on tho doclino — killed, so gays one writer, by (in insensatoidcaon tho part of managers that scanty costume compensates for lack of talont. At the boginning of March not a single comic opera, was playing in the motropolis, save at the Savoy Theatre, and only one new work, "Tha Lady of tho Locket," was promised.

Ur. J. E. Taylor, tho editor of " Science Gossip," and the now lecturer engaged by JVIr Smythe in London, leavesforJVlelbourno ou April Sth. If he oan only lecture as well as ho writes.he should prove a worthy rival to Archibald Forbes. Ho brings out an immense assortment of slides For use in tho oxy-hydrogen lantern to illustrate his lectures.

Mr Augustus Harris lately treated a merry crowd of soldiors' children to a glimpse of the Drury Lauo pantomime Tlio fathers belonged to tlio various regiments of font guards stationed in London, and tho military authorities granted Iho use of the wnffgoiw of tho enmmi.isfirmt transport corps to convoy tho yoiuifj^rers to and from tlio theatre.

Aosordins* to n Olirktcluircli exchange Miss do Grey's Company separates in Auckland, leaving Mrs Walter Hill and Mosers.T. P. West and Patterson behind. Mr Kingliornc, the low comedian of the troupe, is .so enamoured of the colonies that ho intends immediately upon his arrival in London engaging a company to travel through Australia and New Zealand.

An admirer of Shakespeare ia now claim ing for the poet the credit of bavin;; anticipated Sir Isaac Newton's discovery of the taws of gravitation, lie bases his con tention upon tho following linesiii "Troilus awd Crcssida," spoken by Cressida in not IV. scene .'!.— Rut the stronn base ami building of my love Is as the vory contra of the earth, Drawing all things to it.

Romcnyi lias been enthusiastically ro ceiral on tho West Coast. Ho was (says the ITokitika "Timos ") so cnvapturod with the beautiful scenes presented during the journey from Christchnrch to llok'itika, that ho haR undertaken to write for the benefit of our readers a sketch of his im pressions. Tho papor will be entitled " A I'ccp Into and a I'.ido Through a ITairy Land."

Mips Emelio Melviilo writes to the Melbourne papers to say that hor company have treated her very Iwdly in Oalcufii. The chorus rebelled over salaries one night, and tho opera "OitohY: Girclla" was produrorl with a chorus of six. Miss Mclvilio says 1 hot they demanded higher

wages in India th.-in had been aprocd upon, -nri <,!,„ , ,f,, a ,,,l £(,„ ~ ;ll ~;,„ „ ~„,.,..„. ; n " -vl-n ] !.!,{',. rrn '!» ,'., T -T.^-,,', <-•'.<* | Tho event whii'h is just now sotting London society ugi,g- is tho intended return to the stage nf age mine lady of rank in the person of Lady Maxse, widow of the late ijovomor of Newfoundland. Many of the aristocracy have tried in vain lo dissuade her from the step. Lndy Mu::se is a very beautiful womun, has been a widow only a fow months, is very rich, and lonely, and is understood to cock solace for her griuf in her former beloved calling. She was at the time of her marriage a, noted actress in Vienna, where »he created a perfect furoro in some ot iiistori's roles.

[>y the way, Mr A. T. Dunning has had a bad time of it lately. A writ was issued against him by a well-known printing firm ot Sydney for the sum of £10211s, alleged to be duo for advertising and posters for "Man teanx ISoirs." A wiit was issued, and Mr Dunning was arrested when on the point of ■joing to Xowca.-tle He then paid i'5U, and gave a promissory noto, under protest, for the remainder. An action was brought to set aside the writ, which was defended on the ground that, plfiintiil'would not return from Brisbane. After argument the writ was set aside, the costs of application to be. defendants' i:o:4 in the suit.

On April 9, lit Melbourne, nn application wai made in Chambers on behalf of the defendants in thopa^o lollard v. Mackinnon ami ulliors, proprietors of tho "Argus'1 news jia[)cr, for commission io ispuo to examine witnesses in Calcutta and New Zoaland. The action id oiiq by Ihe proprietor of the woll-kuown Pollard Juvonile Opera Com pany to recover damages for an alleged libel in tlio '"Argna" of December, ISSX It if pro posed to examine Mr H. Sulir.gei1, publican, of Calcutta, and two girls, in'cmbors of the company, named l>u Lormo (niece of the late W. 15. Langbridpe), and Wallace. It was stated for tho plaintiff that Salinger was now travelling as agent for a theatrical company in the Malay Peninsula, and that the two girls would shortly return to Mel bourne An order was made for a commis .sion to Calcutta, returnable in two months ; the commission to New Zealand to stand over awaiting the return of the girls.

A LADY'S LETTER FROM LONDON.

Feminine Facts, Fancies, and Frivolities.

(»Y KUBK.)

London, March,

Dkah Mr Editor,—Tho season lias opened dolefully, and promises to be a? Hat, stale, and utterly unprofitable as last yoar's. Fashionable milliners are in despair. In the first place, there is to be no Drawing Koom before Easter, a fact unimportant enough to most of us, but which signifies want of work, hunger, and possibly starva tion to scores of needy sempstroeses. Then,

some great ladies have decreed that society is to go into mourning for General Gordon, Colonel Burnaby, and Sir ijorbert Stewart, and tlie other heroes who lost their lives in tho Soudan. The peeresses' gallery at tho ] louse of Lords during the debato en tho vote of consure presented a atrango spectacle. It was. tilled with ladies, but nowhevo couhl ono discover co much as a speck of colour. All wore black. l'oor Lady Stewart has never lifted up herlioad since the fatal news of herhusbnnd s death wa.s communicated to iier. She had only been married eight ycurs, and wan devoted to him. They have two littlo boys ; the oldest, is said to bo a tiny replica of hia father. '1 hu absence of the Guards makes a great diU'erencii to London " society " in heaps of ways. At Sandown Park last: week, for in stance, familiar taces were missing on every hide. Tho feminine element., liowuvor, mustered in force, and much admiration was bestowed on (ho Humorous tailor-made dresses, neat and exquisitely fitting, which adorned tho lav. n. 1 was not there, but I hear those who were enjoyed the meeting iminentoly. There in but cue opinion in London society about the Durham divorce case.' The un happy husband was most shamelessly de ceived by his wife's family, and ought to ljuvo his liberty. I never saw Lady Durham after her marriage, but 1 remember Aliss Kdith Milner perfectly. She was at Ascot with tho Cisrards in ISS'2, and attracted a yood deal of attention Her pa!e, chilly, statuesque beauty was a striking contrast to tho piquant vivacity of pretty Mrs llorard. Tho pair were surrounded by c(ui!o a bevy of men, more especially on 11 tint ('up day, when they wore the " Sweet bread " colours, and (in consequence of Mr Gerard's colt's victcry) became tho heroines of tho afternoon.

Many of you reading the divorce proceed ings may wonder why Lord Durham di.i not break oil tho marriage when his Jiancut. acted so strangely. As a matter of fact, I bcliove Jlisa Miiners conduct at tracted rather than repelled tho young man. Sho confessed to loving him, ana knowing heposscit-ed her attachment, her ox cessivo shyness and modesty, and her lack of pass-ion, did not trouble him much. "When wo are married that will soon disappear," ho said to himself comfortably. The fact is, men in Lord Durham's position learn to despise fast women of every class whilst '• sowing thoir wild oats. "Consequently when they resolve to sottle down and marry, they invariably a fleet shy and quiet girls. Miss Milnor seemed likely to make Lord Durham a beautiful and dignified Countess. Ho knew she was a "very stupid girl," but that doesn t seem to have troubled him much, tier odd ways of going on at times ho put down either to girlish coquetry or petulance

No doubt the Milner family took good care Miss Edith should not bo too often with her lover. It was only on " certain days" sho was permitted to see him. Lord Durham doesn't appear to have had a suspicion of the truth till the marriage ceremony was just over. Then as bis bride lay back in the carriage which had just pickod them up at the church door, and, wildly repulsing his caresses, stared stonily out of the win dow, the first awful doubt crossed his mind. That night he knew (or thought he knew) his wifo was absolutely mindless, little more than a beautiful animal in fact, but even then he had no notion that she was, or could ever bocome, a maniac.

Subsequently, "-honthefactof therebeing hereditary mania in the Milner family trans pired, when his wife's mother committed suicide in a fit of insanity, and when that wifo herself sank into dangerous idiocy, Lord Durham '^indignation knew no bounds. Was he to bo tied to a lunatic wifo all his days? Lady Durham's bodily health was perfect. She may, probably will, live for 50 year? He consulted his lawyers, and eventually tho case just concluded was laid beforo tho Divorce Court. ]n tho opinion of.' society, the Milners showed shocking bad taste in defending tho action. The likeness botwecn Lady Durham's condition and that of the supposition heroine, of "Called Back" lias formed a fruitful subject for paragraphcrs in tho "society " journals. Many of them take a romantic view of the cuso, and blame Lord Durham for not making more efforts to woo his "beautiful, silent divinity" back to lovo and sanity. As a matter of fact, tho poor girl's easo is hopeless. In society a very strong belief prevails to tho cil'ect that Lord Durham was principally inspired to rake divorce, proceedings by lovo for liladys, Lady Lonsd:ile, tlie famous beauty.

Tom took us to sco Lord Lytton'a post humous drama, "Juntas, or the Household Hods," tho other evening. I'laycd at somo provincial or colonial theatre without tho gorgeous spectacular clients, countless supers, and powerful anting which now render it ono of the most attractive pieces i'l London, I ean,quito imagino " Juntas " would bo heavy, not to pay dull. At the Princora's, Mr Wilson Barrett has simply dnno everything that could be done for the piny. Ancient Rome, ideally classic, pic turesque, and luxurious, lies before us. The I'rineo of tha Xarquimi, the mined Temple of Romnlua by night, Lucrotia'e homo, find last, but not leant, tho famous Hall of Tarquin,arc one and all reproduced in scenes as romantically beautiful as (it is averred) they arc archsuQlogieally correct. The old story of the rape of Lucrece and the vengeance of Brutus never enjoyed a more perfect setting. Lord Lytton's lines, too, arc sonorous, and often beautiful. One lias less tawdry sentiment and more genuine, feeling than is usual in his poetic dramas. "Juninp" will nr-.ver be half RO popular as " Richolieu, but in many roapoeta tho critics consider it a bettor play.

The last scene deserves a word of descrip tion, though I'm afraid I can never convey to you its wonderful oil'ect. Upon a lofty, golden throne, between two massive pillars reaching the full height, of the stage, sits the tyrant Soxtus Tarquin, surrounded by guards, and attended by his trusty counsellor, the sago Sophronion. Sextus

solemn, dignified, i.<?i. x ihlp ~utus. He denounces Tarcjiiin, nr»d tells til T*l"- --of Lucretia's shame. Tier tL I toi7 friend, turn away and hUrfS^W froir. him in disgust. Annalle.) I * grovels for merry before X^ t latter drags the dastard back 2, t T, he lofty seat, and then stab, hfaß^* 01* the curtain falls, " Rome is ftS'i^"* as Mr Willard as Tarquin and Mr Wn Barrett us Brutus carry off "he L BOn i ht. performance The latter J^T." 1 Tomc^.'-clossictoggery.";^B^, tho manner born." Ho looks evJv ? the noblo Roman. Mica EastlakeY mch much to do, but doc, it lackada iec S n 1 can never get over tho idea that sh", th« character 1 first «aw iier renro.« »• ° heroine of tho " Lights^ iffi"^ actressos worn quite incapable of shlT thoir individuality. nl!lllg " Masks unti Faces," accounted h,, critic, tho greatest success in thJZ?I Bancroft rej>erMn,im revived at the Ha? market for a short farewell season th eo Z' evening. Mrs Bancraft is,ofcou™> Charles Pomander," and Mi* ZtZ &' to wipe out recollection of first Ellen OW ■■ and nlrervt-nrds Marion Terry aa "I /' Scnce. "**" &»*Z. '

In 1874 a vaudeville entitled "Nemedi<" 1 which you have no doubt had at B orne tl or other in Isow Zealand, made a'hit «♦ T Strand Theatre, wit), Edward C ft :. principal part This has now been revi ed i at the Comedy with Arthur R ober^ £ ~ Torrys character and draws well, they ■ say. "The Denhams" at the CoatU--■ not at all a nice-toned piny I can't ' imagine what object there can be in dnu • ging auch a disagreeable story as it dm).' ' with before the public. **"' <: i We looked in at the Strand last Tnead»v; " evening to renew our acquaintance with * Miss Jennie Lee's "Jo." The theatre m. ' not, 1 am sorry to say, half full, nor ™ the piece altogether well played Tk Buckctt of Mr Burnett, the Chatbandl of "r Mr Wilmot, and the Hortence of Mi™ '* Dolores Drummond are as good asever but • Miss Ada Ward as Lady Dedlock and Mr Ben Greet as Sir Lester, fail lamentable $ Miss Ward is hard, unsympathetic! and unemotional to a degree that one would liavo believed impossible In the great scene where she tells EstW she is her mother, the house, instead of • listening with wrapt attention, shuffled • wiggled, coughed, and sneezed. Miss Ward discoursed in an even tiresome ' monotone, and the young lady who repre-' sentod Esther Summerson, responded with equal feebleness, and naturally when the'•'■■ curtain fell there was some hissing. Jennie Lee has played "Jo " too often, It is fitill a wonderful character sketch - but it lacks spontaneity. Moreover, too.. much elaboration renders it occasionally in consistent. At times, no doabt, Miss Lee : really acts "Jo," and then I can quite imagine she harrows people's feeling! to a"> ghastly extent. On Tuesday, I believe she . simply went through perfectly familiarbaa. ness without feeling it one bit. It was all, very clever, andveryinterestjng.butwewere ■' nottouched. When, however, inthedeatk•■'*■ bed scene the actress gave herself a "* little rein and began—so to speak—to take an interest in her own performance, the ,'■■> effect was electrical. Every word and movement went straight home. Toinhad't

to put down his opera glasses and turn " away from the stage, for fear of-as be! ? said-making a fool of himself, and I w-pt .1 copiously for flomo moments. '■/*' Taken as a whole, though, we came to tti, conclusion that Nellie Farren's slight sketch of a street boy is in many respects i truer to life than Miss Lee's. "i'

Disraeli on Women.

1 think that Disraeli, in an old manuscript baa treated tho sex abominably. Still I cannot avoid occasionally laugbing with' him, for his reflections, though not always just, aro gonerally amusing, Hfireisafintf budfrot of extracts: str

"Coquettes j;ive their blossoms tothui lovers and their thorns to their husband!,

" When a woman has lost one battlei); rarely wins another against the same foo. ";■

"A bluKh often announces tho departure as well as the arrival of shame.

" Why do tho Gormanß make the town masculine ? Surely we are justified inrfr garding her as feminine, since ehe is essew tially changeable. "Men are people who make rules; womea are people who irako exceptions, ,? : "It is recorded that God said,' Let w make man in our image, after our likenes^'r It would perhaps have been impolitic ia Moses to hint mono directly that vronu was made in a very different mould. P(: conclusion, however, is obvious. '.'•'; " There is no marriage in heaven; witter is there any heaven in marriage. ;i; i "A beauty without wit seems to me to »} pombie a bait without any hook in it .«■ >■ "I beiieve that there are some women« wear petticoats simply lest th«y should ht? mistaken for men. ''-iy " There is this difference between pawn and lovo—tlie ono breeds headaches, to, other breeds heartaches; but neither man bo dangerous if there wore no fools in tM "Lovo ceitainly increases the popalA. | of the world, but I doubt whether it *M> •; much to that of heaven. _ ' " Of all the women whom I haw HOT" I chiefly remember those who forgot w; ' solves. ' ~" .(.£,-'. "If a man doea not take his w» »-. church the chances ore that,*»« '• later, ho will be obligedto follow her tti». " Adam in Paradise must have slept vnj peacfifully-until he had the mutaW1 '""iwomanisflatteredbythelove^of; a"S&eTmuchlikeasp^l|' cage set in a garden on a wwtew. ins would be out and the'Onta.mnMW* " Love, like a fire, ia liable to tew» guished by overmuch stirring. • y , "A good woman wearies a mu,#^ ; one worries him. '■fa.iiftkt'. ---«It is often not until ii womantoWJ » she is too old to be loved byrosnWtP socks to be loved by God. r-J. „ "The word 'curious1 m^S well as inquisitive. Woman, uW^ , of the word, is a curious animal.^ : "Man is a substantive; woman «» adjective. , j lT ivof '• i "Addition is the bounden duy ~ bachelor. When he has n^XV tiplication will followm• m%*** o^ •■The two most difficult W^J fc , Co^Ct ra eti m e S eal^ S: S dess, but he would not love for tfe« - one. This fact, doubtless, wjflj^f partiality which was shown W». fr Cod for the daughters of menjßO g-J deluviau period. The d«tt °: ! must have boon a little too eawrt*^^ "It does not speak woll Wr *°f-' aino»? i that, asarule.T.ebestsu^B^}, women that has the lowest «J" ~-., th^i is perhaps extraordinary gfi\ marriages'do not turn <*£$$&*.<■ the woman generally marries^ »P world, while the man as genera") to uc-t nut of it. vgtthe^ffl'i: I' » The great argument <«»*%,,*': ,ion of women to public positions' .

sh.o always has a deity. , h(!n M "Most women fed are charged with little *£$£*»■ they are not guilty; know that hor ffwltoare so often , chief charm.'. tu n rtohefff^jf "A man will return ra horto" fr , deceived him than to her vW , : coived. l^nfhnto *01J, a!/ "Itiswelltoremembc rtt» ■ $i oycandenwarenotalUttb^ . . her head. . nt .i, W i vtyftl -If woman were by n^,^ tries to make herself b5;, ort' s d()I1 ]0.. drradfully difcontentert. -i" in "Kew'York World. ' f

Just to Satisfy Herself.

ago to visit; a lady f'^Sl ««&% bor engaged in watehmgwlth^^ tho freaks of a tauio raM» . I^Seandseomyp^"^ replied, *1«"*\? three hundred y^JSV*.^'. did or not."

THE AUCKLAND EVENING STAft. SATURDAY, MAY 2, 1885,

4