MARK TWAIN’S FRIEND, THE UNDERTAKER.

In this now book, entitled “ Life on the MiMWwppl;”' Mark Twain tells how at Omaha ho learnt the following ■wrinkle on “ the art of inhumation ” : About the same (time, I encountered a man fo the street, whom I had not seen for six or seven years; and something like this talk followed. I said : ' “But yon used to look sad and oldish; you { Were did you got all this youth and bubbling cheerfulness 1 Give me the address. ’ , He chuckled blithely, took ofFhis shin ing tile, pointed to a botched pink circlet of paper pasted into his crown, with something lettered on it, .and went on chuckling■ T while d read 1 “ J.B. , Undertaker.” 1 Then he clapped his hat on, gave it an,irreverent,tilt to leeward, and cried outfr 1 what’s the- matter ! It used to *elWligh : ’Hinie,B. With me when you knew rbe-brfnsurance-kgency business, you knot#J»l : -irregul&r. Big fire, all right —brisk trade for ten days while people scared; after that, dull policy business till next fire. Town like this don’Auhavw-fires often enough a fellow strikes so many dull weeks in a row that he gets discouraged. But you b.t, this is the busmeas I < People: don’t wait for ex ampieslto die.t No,;isir, drop oft right along—there ain’t any- dull spots m the undertaker line. I just started in with two or three little old coffins and. a hired hearse, and now look at the thing!- I*VO worked up a business here that would satisfy any man, don’t care who he is. Five years ago lodged in an attic; live in t a swell house now, with a ihansard root; and all the modern inconveniences.” “ Does a coffin pay so well ? la thsre much profit on a coffin 1” f . O “ Go-way 1 How you talk !” Then, with a wink, a dropping of the voiceband"an impressive laying of his hand bn my arm : Look here ; there’s one thinsA inp&is* (World which isn’t ever cheajt *That’s L a; coffin. There’s one thing in this world which a person don’t ever try to Jew you down on. - That s a r coffin. There’s one thing in this world which a person don’t -say, “ I'll look round a little, and if 1 fiLnd; I.can’t do better. I’ll come back land take’ it. That’s a coffin. Thldfe’s one thing in this World which a won’t take in pine if he can gc wmSut; arMTwobttake in walnut if he ian tgo mahogany ; an«i Won’t take in m4Hogaoy if he can go an iron casket with-Javer door-plate and bronze handles,. That’s a opffiß i &bd thbfe’s one thing in this world which you. don’t have to-worry around after a person to get him to pay for. And that’s a coffin. Undertaking? why, it’s the dead-surest business in Christgpjotp, snd- ; thC nobbiest. ■ “Why, just look at it. A rich man won’t bub. your, very best; and db t on, it on and sock it to■ him ’-f-he .won’t even hollet- you take in a pbor man,' and if you work him right he’ll bust himself on a single lay-out. Or especially a woinagu.- Flr t instance;:,Mrs O’Flaherty , .baf: eyes and kind of moaning. Unhandkerchief’s one eye, bats it around tearfully .over, ; the, stock ; says : ,1 * 1 ‘.Jui * - 1 •» “ ‘And fhat might ye ask fur that wan? “ ‘ TfiCcty-nina dollars, madam,’ Says L “ * It’s a foiatebig prrce, Bure, but Pat shall be hurried like a gentleman, as he was; if I had to work my fingers- off for it rjWkpWlthJjtßteua* sor.’S: “ ‘ Fes, madam,’ says I, ‘and its a very good one too; not costly, to be sure, but in th’s life we must cut our garment to our clothes, as the saying is.’ i: Andiasr she starts ami heave in, kind of casually, * This ona-with the white satin lining is a beauty, but I am afraidr-well, sixty-five dollars is a rather—ralheß4botno matter I felt obliged to say to Mrs O’Shaugh nessy—” : - ‘"‘D’ye mahe' to soy that Bridget O’Shaughnessy bought the mate to that joo-ul box to ship that dhrunken divU to Purgatory in ?’ “Yes, madam.'* “ ‘Then Pat shall go to Heaven in the twin to it, if it takes the last rap the O’Flaherties ran raise ; and moini you, stick on some extras, too, and I’ll give ye another dollar.’”

“And as I lay-in with the livery stables of course I did not forget to mention, that Mrs O’Shaugljnesay hired fifty-four dol lars’ worth-OT^BaoKh, 1 and filing' as 'much style into Dennis’s funeral as if he had been a duke or an 1 assassin. And of conrse she .sails in and goosAhe O’Shaugh nessy abotft* four hacks add; an omnibus better. G -^T i hat- , used E 'to i hb, but that’s all played how ; that is, in this particular town. .'iThb 'Xriihlgot tb filing up hacks soon their funerals, that-a funeral left them ragged. Ahd lhungry for two- years' afterwards; <4O Che priest pitched in and broke it-allnp.)-'He-don’t allow them to have bqVtwo itacks .now, ? and sometimes only onje.i”,j i : mi-'' “ W01W” said I, if j on ; are so light heartecb and jolly ;in ordinary times/ what must ydu-be in an epidemic ? ’ He shook his head. ■ * “ Noy-y Oil’tfe off. there. We don’t like to see ;An epidemic don’t' pay. WalliJjfjcoutee,' I don’t mean that exactly; but it don’t pay in proportion to a regular thing. Don’t it occur to you why?’ v* “ No.” ' ilo .*

“ Think.”r*n >six h : -~ “ I can’t imagine. .Whalis'it ?” ... “ It’S'ftaSt ifefelihitigs: ’H ell, what aratbevd”'' “Ontfifefaibarawirig’:-i I 1 “ And-what’s the other?” «£osyjw VA m _v- - u Hon.lSjtnM.l, 1 ■ “ jondinayy tim.es,; a> person. dies; and we W in aca; one day. two to com& ailot of it -malts 'ast. We for that-ice, and wac-pfjSee,. fo^.attendance., Well, don’t you know, when there.'? ap epidemic they rash ’em to the cemetery the minute the breath’s but. No markej; for ice, in an epid¥fbic.D jaSthe %ith bmbafnming. You take a family that’s ablp to embam, and you’ve got a soft thing. You can mention saftep. djflpbpnti waff tofdo it— ? though there 4WV only one'or two? ways, when you come down to.„the bottom facts of it—and they’ll take the highest priced way, every ‘time. 1 -'lt's' human nature—hpfftajk reason, you sot. wantp is physical immortality for'deceased, and they are willing tb tfey>for -it. '<All you’ve got to do is to ,apijl stack it up— they’ll staha *|hp.j»qKet.i .Why, man,, you can take a aetunot sjat ypu couldn’t give away; and get your ,einbamming traps aroqnd you .apd .go to w.ork,. and in a couple of hours he is worth a cool six' hundred-r-that’s he’s worth. ; There ain’t anyt'Kffag’.qaaal ' to it, but trading rats for . diamonds ia .time of famine. Well, see," wheh ,there’s an epi demic peqpe don’t No, -indeed thev bonjt ; . ahd it . hurts the business BKS 4t like hell-th, T—our, little joke in the trade. going Give me SM wßendver you need anyr-I mean, when your going by some time.” In bis joyful bieh spirits be < did the exaggerating .liniewi, -jf apy. >has, been done. I have not enlarged bn him. r ': With the above brief reference to , in humation, let us leave the suhj'ect* .As for me, I hope to be cremated. .X made the remark to my pistqr opce, .who said, with tb think'was an im pressive 4fM4r/ 'wouldn’t worry about that if I had your chances,” „ . ■ Much it—the family^ so annosedto it.

THE ASHBURTON GUARDIAN, THURSDAY, OCTOBER 18, 1883.

Printed and published daily, for THE Al&k- \ burton Guardian Company, Limited,!^' 1 ° ' Henry Vincent Sawteel, of Burne Street, Ashburton, at the Company’sJjPrin r ' u ! ing House, West street Ashburton. ‘ ZZ '



Quiet nerve and-lialmy Hop Bitters for sleepless ladies and invalids. Notice. — advt.] -iriooli. •



Hop Bitters. BEAD IT ALL. IT MAY SAVE YOUR LIFE. Hop Bitters ARE THE PUREST AND BEST Medicine ever made. THEY ARE COMPOUNDED FROM Hops.Buchu, Mandrake and Dandelion ‘The Oldest Best, most Renowned, ‘and Valuable Medicines in the World, * and in addition contain all the best and * most effective curative properties, of all * other bitters, being the greatest Liver ‘Regulator, BLOOD PURIFIER, and ‘life and health restoring agent on earth. ’ They Give New Life and Vigor to the Aged and Infirm ‘‘To Clergymen, Lawyers, Literary ‘Men, Laborers, Ladies and all those ‘ whose sedentary employments cause * irregularities of the Blood, Stomach, ‘ Bowels or ICidneys, or who require an ‘ Appetizer, Tonic and mild Stimulant, ‘ these Bitters are invaluable, being highly ‘ curative, tonic and stimulating, without ‘intoxicating.” “No matter what your feelings or * symptoms are, or what the disease or ‘ailment is, use Hop Bitters. Don’t ‘ wait until you are sick, but if you only ‘ feel' bad dr miserable, use the Bitters at , ‘ once. It may save your life. H undreds * have been.saved by so doing, at a trifling ‘cost.” • Ask your druggist or physician. “Do not suffer yourself or let your ‘ friends sufler, but use and urge them to ’.fuse Hop Bitters.” “Remember, Hop Bitters is no vile, ‘drugged, drunken nostrum, but the ■ ‘ purest and best Medicine ever made, and * no person or family should be without ‘it. HOP BITTERS MANUFACTURING Co, Melbourne, Australia, Rochester, ; N.Y,, U.S.A., Toronto, London, Antwerp, Paris.



Sporting. —BURTON RACING CLU B. November 15th and 16th, 1883. President : E. G. Wright, M. BLR. "Vice-President : W. 0. Walker. Judge: Matthew Stitt. Stewards : 0. Ef. Dowding, H. Friedlander, J. Qrigg, T. Leahy, W. G. Robs, W. Saunders, Clerk of the Scales : M. Friedlander. Clerk of the Course : ' ; W. B. Denshire. Handioappbrs : Open Rages—E. G. Griffiths. District Races —E. G. Crisp, 0. C. Fooks, T. Leahy, M. Stitt. First Race each day to start at 1 p. m. FIRST DAY. . 1. County Hurdle Race (Handicap), of 30 sova; over six flights of hurdles aboutf3ft Gin high ; nomi nation, 1 sov ; acceptance, 1 sov. 1£ miles. District horses only. 2. Free Handicap, of 40 sova ; accept ance, 2 sovs ; 1 mile. 3. Maiden Plate, of 40 sovs ; weight for age ; entrance, 3 sovs; 1J miles. 4 Ashburton Cup (Handicap), of 150 bcvs ; nomination," 2 sovs ; accept ance, s‘sovs; l£ miles. 5. Ladies’ Purse, of 40 sovs ; welter weights for age ; gentlemen riders ; entrance, 3 sovs; l£ miles. District horses only. 6. The Post Stakes (Handicap), of 15 sovs ; nomination, 1 sov, to be made to the Secretary immediately after the Ladies’ Purse is run ; acceptance,, free, to be notified within ten minutes of declaration of weights ; 1 mile. District horses only, SECOND DAY. ' 1. Handicap Hdrdlbßacb, of 60 sovs; over eight flights of hurdles about 3ft Gin high ; nomination, 2 sovs ; ' acceptance, 2 sovs ; 2 miles.. ' 2. Racing Club Handicap, of 75 sovs ; nomination, 2 sovs ; acceptance, 2 sovs r 1J miles.. 3. County Plate Handicap, of 40 sovs; nomination, 1 sov; accept ance, 1 sov; 1£ miles. District 1 horses only.: 4 Flying Handicap, -of 60 sovs., nomi» nation, 1 sov ; acceptance, 2’sovs ; | mile 5. Totalisator Stakes (Handicap), of 15 Bovs ; nomination, 1 sov; accept : ance, free ; | mile. District horses '? only. - 6. Consolation Handicap, of 20 sovs ; . • nomination, 1 sov, to be made im* mediately after the Totalisator 1 Stakes is run ; acceptance, free, to < be notified within ten minutes of ; declaration of weights. Distance, SPRING MEETING. THURSDAY AND FRIDAY, H. T. Winter. Treasurer: 0. 0. Fooks. ..Starter : David Thomas. i 1 mile.



RULES AND I REGULATIONS, r i; No entry will be receiv v i except on < the 1 condition that all disputes, claims and objections arising out of the racing shall ! be decided by the Stewards, or whom they may appoint; their decision on all points connected with; carrying out this programme to be final. 2. Canterbury Jockey Club Racing Rules strictly adhered to. 3. A district r horse shall; mean any has been commonly resident in the Ashburtou County from July 31,1883, and; up to the date of the forth coming meetingj and owned by a person, who has resided in; the said county during the same period. A gentleman rider shall bo deemed to be one who has not ridden for hire during the past five years. 5. All entriesand nominations to be ac companied by entrance fees, name and age of horse, and colors of rider, and in the hands of the Secretary, addressed to Quill’s Hotel, not later than 9 p. m. on Thursday, November Ist. Weights for the first day’s Handicaps and Open Hurdle Race will be published on Friday, November 9th, Weights for other Handi caps will be published- at 8 p. m. on the evening of the first day’s racing* 6. Acceptances for the : first days! Handicaps and Open Hurdle Race to be. paid;to the Secretary, not later than 9i p.m; on Tuesday, .November 13th; ac ceptances for other Handicaps at 9 p.m. , evening of fipst day’s racing. * Five per pent iwill be deducted from the gross of all monies payable in ac cordance with this programme for ex penses of the course. 8. All nominations, and acceptances ga tathe fund. , S. SAUNDERS, / 8 222 . ; Secretary,



Consignations, KS jL Sw. jL *' 0 S E, WI L L C L ON OB ABOUT 2 sth OCTOBER. THE GOLDFIELD CONSULTATION COMPANY, On the Melbourne Cup, 1883 (the coming event of this year.) 4,000 INVESTORS AT £1 Each. J 5» Ist Award 12 2nd Award o' 3rd Award Starters divide £P Non-starters £2OOO 1000 500 300 200 I*, Grand Total £4OOO Every speculator should take a share, inf the above at oncei AS shares-are being taken up sharp. Applicants please send the usual £1 notes (or P. O. O. preferable and safer). Registered letters NOT ac cepted; Will be drawn under the full in spection and satisfaction of bona fide Committee of Shareholders^. - and : result slips sent promptly to every investor. Enclose 4d in stamps for reply and result. Note —A fortune may be the result to anyone investing fora sinall_ outlay. All awards are substantial, the lowest being equal to many first in others. A quorum of leading gentlemen of the highest social position will act a “ scrutineers.” Address to “ QUAU.TZOPOLIS,” Care of T. LENNOX, Box 53, P.O. Thames. N.B.'— Agencies in Melbourne, Dun edin, Christchurch, Nelson, Coromandel. Auckland and Ashburton. 9 568 A FORTUNE FOR FIVE SHILLINGS. A FORTUNE FOR ss. DAMASTOR’S NOVELTY CONSULTATION ON THE MELBOC RN E C U P, 1883. A 1 To be Run on the 6th of November. Capital £5,000, In 20,000 Shares of 5s each. 431 Prizes guaranteed. To be distributed as follows : Melbourne Cup. First £SOO Second... ... 300 Third ... ... 200 Starters (divided) 500 Non-starters ... 1,000 £2,500 Cash Awards. 5 at £IOO each 5 at £SO each TO at £25 each 20 at £l2 lOseach 40 at £6 5s each 200 at £5 0s each £2,500



Each ticket has seven separate chances, Race and Cash Awards being, drawn for separately. Please send Post-office Orders, when convenient, or Bank Notes. Cheques must be marked‘“.correct” by-Bank. If Stamps are sent for tickets please add one shilling in the pound extra. V - ; Notice. Registered letters not ac cepted. Two stamps required .for reply and resalt. Will close on dr about the 3rd of November. Address— “ADAMASTOR,” Care of Lyons and Hart, 7 60 Box 151, P. 0., Dunedin. \ _—:— Robin hood’s great novelty COMPANY I OV THE MELBOURNE CUP AND NEW ZEALAND CUP, I*B3, Run 6th November, in r Melbourne and Christchurch. Subscribed capital of £IO,OOO, in 20,000 Shares of 10s each. 285 Prizes; Six separate allotments, each Share having Six Distinct Chances, Melbourne Cup. . (150 Prizes) First: Horae...£2ooo Second Horse 1000 Third Horse... 500 Other Starters (div) ... 1000 Non-starters (div) ... 1500 1 New Zealand Cup. (66 Prizes) First Horse...£looo Second Horse 500 Third Horse.. 250 Other Starters. (div) 1 J ’I./ 250 Non - starters (div) ... 1000 £3OOO £6OOO | 69 Cash Bonds. 3 at £IOO each £3OO I 20 at £lO each £2OO 6at £sQ,each » 300 ; p40 at-£5 each... 200 £IOOO Each Race and Cash Award drawn separately, thus an investor of 10a has Six chances of winning £3165. Application, if by letter, with 2d stamps, and exchange on cheques (Is added). Money orders, Bank notes and drafts, registered. letters, and telegrams received and promptly at tended to. ■ Address— ‘ " i ... ROBIN HOOD, ' Care of Thos Stapleton, Box 238, P» 0., Christchurch; Or care of Jiibal Fleming, . ; City Baths, Oh. Ch. ‘i ■ f 9 604 £3OOO. SWEEP MELBOURNE -CUP. THE GREATEST RACING EVENT OF THE YEAR. , , (Run in Octi—Close as soon as filled.)



12,000 SHARES, 5s EACH. ; An even Four Shares, 20s. To be distributed as follows : First Horse £IOOO | Starters divide £l f 0 Second ... 600 | Non-Starters 100 Third ... 250 ( Total | £2OOO And 10 Prizes at £25 each ... £250 50 Prizes at £lO ~ ... 50P ■ 50 Prizes at £5 ~ Total in Prizes, £IOOO. Grand total £3OOO. THE THIRD CONSULTATION OP - M Y 1883 SERIES. i ’ The success and general satisfaction I over previous events may, be deemed sufficien| intrqdndlipn-fgt |ha above. Clients are requested to send for not less than four shares, taken up in one name. A pound secures four chances—not one only. The right of declining any particular subscription is reserved. Deducted for. oxpenses, 10 per cent.- Probity is guaranteed by good com mercial bona tides. References ; Mel bourne Sportsman and City Journals. Bankers —Sydney : City Bank. Melbourne: National Bank, Applicants are lequested to enclose bank notes and register the, Letter (strong registered envelopes obtainable at every post office) ; if crossed cheque, add Bank charge for collection (payable “Aus tralasia " ior Bdarer); also add 6d on'notes when other than N.S. W. or Yic,, and in alt cases 4d postage frtr reply and result. Enclose two addressed envelopes un stamped. ; . : , i; yr. • One extra Ticket (FREE) with every twenty to One addre&Sp* thds 1 eiidblitlg the promoters of Clubs for every >,!rwiSNTV tickets a chance of being a winner with out investing, necessarily, a penny. ,*B®-REGISTER Application, as usual, by letter. In tending applicants would oblige by writing immediately, to hasten the time (or drawing. , jSS'Foc the convenience of Sydney Subscribers, “ AupThAnASii’s,” Litter Box will be found at the Offices, 40 Hunter street, Sydney, . AP9REBS: AUSTRALASIA, , “ Pare of Mr H. J. Franklin, 'Wholesale Bookseller, Printer and Publisher, 8-223 40 Hunter street, Sydney.



Stud. HORSE CARDS neatly and cheaply printed in all colors and designs at the Guardian office. THE Imported Thoroughbred Steeple chase horse QUAMBY will travel the Ashburton district during the present season. Particulars see cards. Apply JOHN CARTER, , 9‘515 Grove House, Ashburton.



rtlO Travel in the Hinda and Bangitata i districts the Clydesdale Kntire Horse YOUNG SIR COLIN 'iFor particulars apply to OHISNALL BROS., 10 633 Ohinemuri. TO Travel tn the Rakaia, Methven, Hororata, and Dunsandel dislricta YOUNG BLUELIGHT, (Dapple Gray), A good upstanding carriage horse or hack, stands 16| hands. Young Bluelight is out of an Arab mare—imported from Sydney by Sir Cra croft Wilson—by Bluelight. ; Terms—L3 for single mare ;L2 10s for two or more; guarantee L 4 ; payable May 31st, 1884 ; groom fee ss, payable on first service. See future advertisements for further particulars. Apply to CHARLESINDER, 10 632 South Rakaia.



PYTHON WILL Stand at Ashburton the same as usual. Pedigree —Python is a bright bay horse, bred by the Hon. E. K- Cox, N.S.W. He stands 16 hands high, by Kyogle out of Nutcut, dam of Dagworth, Hercules, Al, and Ella, all the greatest performers in the Australian colonies, under heavy weights at all distances. Kyogie by William Tell out of Cassandra, dam of Yattondon. William Tell by Touchstone, imported from England. Owing to an accident when a two-year old, Python was never trained or raced. A glance at the tabulated pedigree will be sufficient to show that Python is one of the grandest and stoutest thorough-bred horses at present in New Zealand. 9 610 Apply to the Groom in charge. rpHE Hackney Stallion, THE WAIF, will serve Mares on the Lowcliffe Estate. Terms—L3 ss, with free run till Ist January, 1884, after which a charge of 2s 6d per week will be made. The Waif is by Castaway, dam Fanny, an imported carriage mare. Fanny was repeatedly shown in the carriage class at Christchurch, and has never been beaten. Also, the Draught Stallion Young Major By Old Major. Young Major’s three-year-old unbroken colts from Lowcliffe mares have invariably topped.the market at the annual sales in Christchurch. Terms —L 3 ss, with free run till Janu ary Ist, 1884, after which a charge of 2s '6d : ;per week will be made. N.B.—No nures will be allowed to be removed until all fees are paid. 10 642 TO TRAVEL THIS SEASON IN ASHBURTON AND SURROUND ING DISTRICTS, The Clydesdale Horse PRETENDER. PEDIGREE. Pretender is a dark bay with black points, rising nine years old, with good bone and substance; stands 16£ hands high,; splendid temper, good action, and a quiet worker. Pretender is by Prince Charlie (imported from Scotland by Mr W. Bpag) out of Maggie by King Fergus (imported from Scotland by Mr David Lines). Maggie’s dam imported from ‘ Tasmania. Pretender gained second prize at thp Northern Show as a two-year-old in 1876. He also took second prize in 1877. Terms—£2 for the season, guarantee £3, payable on the Ist January, 1884, and 5s groomage. Groomage fee payable on first service. Will be in Ashburton every’Saturday. For further particulate apply to ■ HAY SMITH, Or to 1 tbe Groom in charge. 9-559



fflO STAND THIS SEAS'N, 1883. . 1 The pure Clydesdale Stallion ; DUNDEE (46). Dundee is a beautiful, bay, seven years old; bred by Mr Robert Wilkin, Christ church. Sire Prince Charlie (4) (im ported); dam Charlotte, by Lord Haddo (imported; 2nd dam Jess, by Cromwell (imported). Terms—£3 each cash firsttimeofservice, "or four guineas end of season. Groo;rage fee 6s; Every care'taken but no re sponsibility. The! above figures refer to Draught Stud Book for New Ze iland. J. CARTER, 9-560 Grove Farm, Tinwald. TO Travel this Season, in the South Rakaia and surrounding districts, 1883, the celebrated Stallion KING; O’ THE VANQUISHERS. KING O’ THE "VANQUISHERS, rising 4 years, is a beautiful bay with splendid action and fine temper, and has got more bone and hair of the right sort than any other colt -of his ago in New Zealand. s . Pedigree : The King was bred by Messrs Fleming and Hedley, out of their famous brood amre Miss M'Cormick, imported from Melbourne. Miss M'Cormiok was pur chased by the lite David Nesbitt from McCormick Bros., Tasmania, and was specially selected for her breeding quali ties—the correctness of that judgment has now been fully verified. Miss M‘Oor mick.by Lincolnshire Hero; gd by Black Champion. (See New Zealand Stud Boot:;) oiKxino o’ the Vanquishers is by that famous stallion Young Vanquisher, im ported from Scotland by the late David Nesbitt; g sire, Vanquisher, first prize at Oamaru in the 3 year old class. Young Vanquisher’s dam by Loch fergus Champion, g d by Champion, better known to breeders by'the name of Blair’s Champion. As a 3-year-old, Young Vanquisher Was first at Geelong, third a the Grand National, Melbourne; as a 4- year-old, first at Geelong and second at Ballarat the same year. He was after wards purchased and ' imported to New Zealand’ by Mr Holly, of Ohristchtlrch. LEONARD WHITE, 10 654 Proprietor, South Rakaia.



TO Travel Ashburton and surrounding districts the celebrated thorough- Kingfiaher is a dark brown horse standing 16 hands high, and is admitted to be one of the most powerful thorough bred horses in the Australasian colonies, and has proved himself a very sure foal getter, as will be seen by the following: In 1880, in Hawke’s Bay district, King fisher served 98 mares, and was success ful in getting 92 foals Further particulars apply to TO Travel this Season in the Ashburton district, the Thorough-bred entire Daniel O’Rourke. Daniel O’Rourke was got by Sledmere (a), dam Brunette (a) ; by Tadmor, dam by Hetman Platoff—Birthday, by Panta loon —Honoria, by Camel. Sledmere, by Daniel O’Rourke, dam by Sleight-of-Hand —Hampton (brown) mare. Daniel O’Rourke has been a vtry good per former on the turf : he has proved him self such by winning the Christchurch Cup and Derby in 1876, If mated with good mares he can produce good racing stock. He is the sire of Badsworth, Sir George, and others too numerous to particularjse. A horse of his description should be well patronised in the district. Daniel will travel the following districts :—Kyle, Wakanui road, Waterton, North and South of the River, Longbeach, Winslow, Tinwald, and remain in his box the end of the week at M-- Beecher’s Central Hotel until Monday. Terms —L 45s per mare, payable Ist January, 1884. Groomage fee ss, pay able on first service. For further particulars apply to th groom in charge. 10 661 R. H. PEARPOINT. bred horse KINGFISHER. 10 725 ED. COOKSON, Ashburton ; Or Groom in charge.



TO Stand this Season the imported powerful and fashionably bred thoroughbred horse CASSIVELAUNUS, Bred by Mr G. Newing in 1869, got by Caractacus, his dam Campanelle by .'Stock well—Florence, by Velocipedi—Marga rette, by Actmon —Snowball, by Prime Minister —Vesta, by Delphini High flyer. Caractacus (win er of the Derby in 1862), got by Kingston—Defenceless, by Defence. See stud book for full pedigree. Cassivelanus is a bright bay, with black points, standing over 16 hands, and show ing immense power and great quality. As a two-year-old he won two races at New market, beating large fields, Caractacus is now the most fashionable as well as the most desirable representa tion of the Venison blood. . . . . Kingston was in every respect bred to stay. His sire, Venison, proved himself a horse of undeniable stoutness, and it is worthy of remark that during his career as a three-year-old he travelled on foot his circuit, which the more modern won ders (Fisherman and Rataplan) accom plished by rail. It is stated upon reliable authority that Venison walked upwards of 900 miles, ran fourteen, and won twelve times in his three-year-old racing season. I. . . Caractacus is in every way most worthy the notice of breeders who fancy the Venison and Defence blood (and who could object to the latter especially 1) more particularly as he—as well as bear ing a marked resemblance to his hand some son in other respects—has a good temper. . . . He is one of the large stamp, but, like' his sire, (a nice-sized, level made horse, with plenty of quality and racing points, and most likely to get racehorses,”— Gopperthwaite’s Sires of the Present Day. Sire of various winners and first favorites for the forthcoming New Zea land and Canterbury Cup—Envious, Fair Agnes colt; also, sire to Encore, late winner of theitunedin Tally-Ho Steeple chase, Miss King filly, and others too numerous to particularise. Will travel throughout the district, of which notice will be given, and any fur ther information on application to MR A. HOBBS, Owner, Quill’s Hotel; or from MR T. QUILL, 10 651 Ashburton.



Ecclesiastical. JpOR AN HONEST DOUBTER, The writer, who haa the aincereat sym pathy for honest doubters, would strongly recommend that, on the chance of there being some truth in Scripture, the reader should take some such step aa using the following lines (at least once every day), which are based on the prayer of a soldier before entering into battle, “ O God, if there be a God, have mercy upon my soul, if I have a soul ” : 1. O God, if God there be, And I’ve offended Thee, In mercy look on me. 2. My soul, if soul there be, Would’st thou Salvation see? Now to the Saviour flee. 3. O Christ, if Christ there be, And Thou hast died for me, I would Salvation see. 4. Spirit, if such there be, And Thou would’st plead with me, O n.ay I list to Thee. 9 549



Business Notices. V. R. Q.OVERNMENT PUBLICATIONS. The following Government Publica tions, with others, can be obtained at the Office of this Paper : Mines Act, 1879 . Mining Companies Act, 1872 Mines Act Amendment Act, 1872 Canterbury Rivers Gaming and Lotteries Debtors and Creditors Act Debtors and Creditors Rules Stamp Act Agricultural and Pastoral Societies Cruelty to Animals Protection of Animals Brandr and Branding Dog Registration Drainage , Sheep Railway Tariff Amendment Companies Road Boards Fencing Act Amendment, 1882 Local Elections Corrupt Practices Licensing Act Licensing Amendment Acts affecting Agriculture and Stock Education Etc., Etc., Etc. MR LAURENCE OXLEY has been Appointed; Agept for the Ashbur ton Guaedian at South Rakaia.



Business Notices?' An EVIL AND ITS REMEDY.—Ti the Editor, —It is ahealthy sign ofthe times when our local papers are beginning to deal in a fearless manner with bankrupts and the bankruptcy laws. The time has come when something must be done either by the legisla ture or by business men themselves to put an end to a state of affairs which is a disgrace to our boasted civilisation. We (the under signed) have been doing business in Ashbur ton about 2% years, and the money we have lost during that period by bankrupts, levan ters, and blacklegs generally amounts to a great deal more than the margin usually ] allowed for bad debts. If the law cannot pro tect us then we must protect ourselves, and there is only one way to do so, viz., to abolish the credit system altogether. This system has been the curse of other countries besides New Zealand, and past experience has proved it to be rotten to the core. Owing to recent heavy losses we have resolved to sell for cash only in future. The honest man who is willing to pay his 20s in the £, and pay as he goes, will find this no disadvant age but a great gain, as he will be able to obtain a first-class article much cheaper than he would under the old system. We shall exert our selves to the utmost as heretofore to give cur customers full satisfaction, and every order will be executed in our usual first-class style—but we shall no longer run any unnecessary risk. Under the cash system we are prepared to offer a special line of tweeds at the following unusually low prices :—Gentleman’s suit made to order, £2 18s 6d'; ladies’ tailor made ulster, £2. All other goods in proportion, for cash only. CRAIGHEAD & CO., TAILORS AND CLOTHIERS, Tancred Street.



E W SEEDS. NEW SEEDS, We beg to intimate that we have re ceived our SHIPMENTS of NEW SEA SON’S Seeds, which on trial have proved to be of extra fine quality. Our FARM SEEDS nclude white and red clover, alskye, cow 4 rasa, trefoil, lucerne, cocksfoot, rye grass, carrots of sorts, mangolds of sorts, including the new mammoth kinds, which have given such great satisfaction to our customers during the last two years. Our GARDEN AND FLOWER SEEDS are the finest we have ever had the satis faction of offering both in quality and variety. They contain many novelties highly spoken of in Kngland, and offered here for the first time. Also : ' TREE SEEDS, comprising blue gum, red gum, weeping gum, peppermint gum, swamp gum, stringy bark, silver wattle, black wattle, pinus insignia, pinus maritima, cupress, macrocarpa, and many others. Also SEED POTATOES, among which is the new American ruby, queen, American fluke, and others of the earliest sorts known ; also Bone Dust in large or small quantities. Tools of all sorts. Plain and ornamental Flower Pots. Pruning and budding Knives, etc, etc.



Sealy Bros., SEEDSMEN, ASHBURTON, 756 ,F. S. Shearer, or THE May bank works, tinwald, begs to thank the public for theii past support, and takes this opportunity to intimate that he is ain position to Manufacture and Repair on the shortest notice all kinds of Machinery, such as— Flour Mills, Saw Mills, Wheels (cogged and wate'f wheels), Combines, Engines, Hand and Foot Treshing Machines; also, all kinds of Spring Carts, Drays, Traps &c. Shearer & Lewis, GENERAL BLACKSMITHS, AND Veterinary Shoeing Forge, Having secured the services of a first-class Shoeing Smith, defy competition. All orders entrusted to their care will receive prompt attention at reasonable charges. Agents for McCormick’s Reapers and Binders. Note the Address— Great South road, Tinwald. 590 d



gPEOIAL NOTICE. Householders who have nob given Shag Point Coal a trial are respectfully invited to do so, as it will be found to be by far the CLEANEST SAFEST and ' .. _ MOST PLEASANT Fuel in the Market. Sold by all the local Coal Merchants. Special rates for quantities of four tons and upwards. For prices apply, P.O. BOX 213, DUNEDIN. 7 149



rnAKE TIME BY THE FORE- X LOOK” The circumstances of social life are widely different in these colonies from those at Home, and therefore the colonial market requires different treatment. This fact Robert Murray, PRACTICAL WATCHMAKER, East street, Ashburton, | was not long in learning after his arrival on these shores, and he at once set his attention upon supplying WATCHES, which, while constructed with every regard to accuracy and reliableness in time-keeping, are also supplied with extra heavy cases, to resist the wear and tear of colonial life. He has just received an- j other supply of watches, and invites attention to prices. Celebrated Englisn levers, made expressly for R. Murray, specially suited for colonial wear, wit extra heavy cases, all the latest improvements, at L 6, L 6 6s, L 6 10s ; higher classes, L 7, L 8 10s, LlO 10s, and Ll2 12s; Rotherhams, L 6 10s. Printed guarantee with each watch sold.



Attention is called to the Clocks, Jewellery, and English. Plate in stock, and to the fact that all kinds of .REPAIRING are done on the premises and GUARANTEED. R. MURRAY’S SHOP is CON SPICUOUS by the “ REGULATOR " of his own manufacture which occupies a place in his window, and serves as an authority on mean time to the town. Watches free and saf<* by post on re ceipt of P. 0.0 7300-96} I



Business Notice* pHOTOGEA PHY. Cartes-de-Visits Portraits Are now taken at C. LAWRENCE’S STUDIO, SAUNDERS’ BUILDINGS, Ashburton, From 7a 6d to 10a per dozen. Pictures' 1 Guaranteed. 966 Q R I 0 K E T. The undersigned will offer during the coming season the whole of his enormous stock at Wholesale Prices, comprising the balance of last year’s Stock, the whole of Mr E. Fuller’s Stock, and 20 Cases to ar rive per Waikato. HUNDREDS OF BATS, To,select from by the following makers:— Cobbett, Duke, Lilly white, Jeffreys, Bart let, Ayers, Bussy, Grimwood and others. Extra large discounts to Clubs and Schools. TO ARRIVE—A Large Stock of Lawn Tennis (good), with all the latest improve ments. ' W. BRICE, Opposite Bank of Sew Zealand, CHRISTCHURCH. 8 338 rpHE ASHBURTON GUARDIAN. I Published Daily, Can be obtained from the folio win 2 AGENTS, who will receive orders Jones, H. M. Clark, F. ... Andrewoa, L. F. ... Garatens and Co. ... Sevan,R. Jephson, 0. P. H... Dellow, James Schoolmaster ... Lambie, J. ... Harris, W. Hood, J. Patterson, W ... Hudson, M. ... Knight, H. ... Hitchcock, H The Triangle East street . East street East street East street Tinwald Mayfield, Hinds Seafield Kyle Winslow Mount Somers Ohertsey Waterton Alford Forest Meihven Notice of Removal.



E M O Y A L. REMOVAL. To Let. Having taken the Premises known as Montgomery’s Corner, I am prepared to let my Business Premises on the Waka nui road (with or without dwelling). SHOP, with Fixtures, 18ft 6in x 28ft, with Show Room same size. , Dwelling consists of 5 rooms, with scullery, etc. Apply, 8 H., M. JONES. Conveyances. Longer ach royal ma.il ooaoh Leaves Longbeach for Ashburton daily (Sundays excepted) at 7.30 a, m., Waterton 8.10 a.m., Ashton 8.25 a.m., Wheatatoiv 8.45 a.m., arriving at Ashburton in time, for the 10.24 express from Christohurcti to Timaru. The coach leaves the coach stables, , Wakanui Road (opposite Central Hotel) j Ashburton, at 4.50 p. m., arriving at Longbeach at 7.30 p.m. Parcels or orders left at any of the above places wiU receive .strict; attention Fares —Through single fares, 5s ; return same day, Bs. ■ From this date RETURN PARE jtt SINGLE RATES, on Saturdays, only, between Waterton and Ashburtom W. E. BOND, Proprietor, 427 c Longbeach. TINWALD AND MOUNT SOMERS RAILWAY. MOUNT SOMERS AND ANAMA ROYAL MAIL COACH. This Coach leaves Hood’s Hotel, Mount Somers, for Anama Railway Station, at 7.30 am. and 5.35 p.m. every Tuesday and Saturday; returning to Mount Somer on the amval of each train. . Parcels and Luggage punctually attended to. Single fares, ?s; return, 3s. n JOHN HOOD Boarding Houses, &c. PRINCE , ALBERT BOARDING HOUSE AND TEMPERANCE HOTELi



0. TRUCKLE begs to return thanks to his friends and the public for their patron age since he has taken over the Prince Albert Boarding. House, and trusts by always hooping a good table and accommo dation for boarders and travellers to re ceive a continuance of the same. Private rooms for families. 0. TRUCKLE, Prince Albert Boarding House and Tem perance Hotel, near Cookson’s Stables, Wills street, Ashburton ; next Odd fellows’ Hall, and one minute’s walk from the Railway Station. Charges strictly moderate. 944



Hotels FOREST HOTEL. John Tisch, Who has again taken the hotel at Alford Forest, would be glad to receive a call from his old friends and as many new ones as can make it convenient'to give a look in. Good accommodation for horses. 1328



IBDETON HOTEL. ARCHIBALD Bi'OOLL (for many years Manager of the late Sir Oracroft Wilson’s Rangitata Station) begs to in form his numerous Friends and the gene ral public that he has taken possession of the Ashburton Hotel, which has been greatly improved and entirely re-furnished and re-decorated, and is now replete with every convenience and comfort. A. M'Coll would, therefore, assure , his patrons that they will have every atten tion bestowed on them. Excellently Furnished PRIVATE APARTMENTS for FAMILIES. - All Liquors kept in stock are under the' special supervision of the Proprietor, who 1 .will gdarantee them to be of the' best de scription and quality,: The Hotel is situate close to the Ash burton Bridge, and the Stabling (being now under the Proprietorship or Mr James W, M‘Rae, late oi the Somerset Stables), is sufficient guarantee that Coun try Visitors, 'with every Ao»' commodation in that respect, 1330



Publication.. IN ‘ THE PRESS, AND WILL SHORTLY BE PUBLISHED, >: “OUR DOMESTIC BIR DB/ BY AUEBn SAUNDKBft This Book, written by an old JTew.Zea- . land coloni t, will be found to conlain the most modern and complete information upon the Breeding, Rearing and Manage ment of every description of Domestic , Poultry; suggestions for the improver ment of Poultry Shows ; all that is'khownio about the nrinciples to he observed in tha,' mating of Breeding Stock; and some well ; , ; defined rules for selecting, with certainty, the most economical and beneficial de-' scription of. food for any animal, froth' a . ‘ baby to a mouse. ‘ it will show'the best ’ l ' sort of fowls to keep, and the rtiles:foY ' selecting them ; and, whilst condentning ; ■ the cruelty and mischief of many common practices, it will point, out how to keep poultry with certain profit, in brilliant health, and producing abundance of ejigjr, . at every season of-the year. ’ Government Notice. V. y'.i THE PUBLIC TRUST OFFICE OF NEW ZEALAND. . Atentlon is directed to the provisions-of : the Acts establishing this Office, andifto an the advantages placed:thereby within.: thou J reach of every colonist. Subject to auch provisions, the State offers to every per 1. —About to make his or her Will or Codicil. ■ ' 2. —lntending to provide for WifeiaHd" Children or others by deed of Settlement*- J 3. —Settling Property byway of Mae*'nr riage Settlement.. , : 4—Desiring to renounce the _.Trtyßtit#£ . ~ a Will, having been appointed Eiecutoro* . ; Trustee under the same. ? ' 5. —Having acted asTruithb, Executor or Administrator, wishing to berelinvaid oi the burthen of Trustee hip or Adminis tration, the option of us i jg the chinecy, and gives an absolute guarantee j! ; against loss of funds by fraud, peculation, rv \ or dishonesty. f > Every information may be obtiunedV from ’• ■ n v , ALEANDER J LEAN 1 , i n ‘ ,J Agent at Christchurch! n ' !fi !lh R. 0. HAMEETON, Poblio Trustee Or from Wellington, 12th May, 1882 Medina iV ■* t'-l -



DEAFNESS. —Quaoka ; selves “Doctors,” are utterly,rauft o a£y ing the organs of hundreds sufiEering ;i, deafness, charging frbta Ds’t6 to • " doing. I have two infallible ’ ‘ (No. 1, deafness arising fromcdldß : J Ndi?T; vr 2, the thickening of the part* oP thtf !IES Tympanum) from recipes pent me by thdseno j world-known Auriata, the [ late anditSPrJi; - ; sent Senior Surgeons of the Iteyai Dif- ( 0 ; pensary for, Diseases of the r j stamps' for ‘particulars tii T.' B. Hanka* _ ■ „ ford, Auckland, N.Z." - : ' 127 CT ‘ u GRATEFUL—COMFORTING. EPPS’S 00 00 A. BREAKFAST. BY a thorough knowledge of the natural u ; laws which govern the operation* oil A, digestion and nutrition, and by a careful ; , application of the fine properties .of well selected cocoa, Mr. Epps has provided , our breakfast tables with a delicately ,' . flavoured beverage which may : save; ua ' ! many koavy doctor’s bills. It is by the '■ ad cious use of such articles of diet that a constitution may be' gradually built up until strong enough to resist every: ten . • deney to disease. Hundreds, of sidbtle .., ; maladies are floating around us ready to attack wherever there' is s weak point. . We may escape many a fatal sh-«ft by' keeping ourselves well fortified withpuie :' ’ blood and a properly-nourished'frame.— See article in the Civil Service Oazette. ,. ~ , Made simply with boiling water or milk. Sold only in packets, labelled ... JAMES EPPS AND 00., HOUQSOFAIHIO OHJEMXBT, , ' LONDON, ’ ' Also, ' : ‘r EPPS, CHOCOLATE ESSEiyOg ' KEATING’S COUGH LOZENGES. - COUGHS, ASTHMA, BRONCHITIS accumulation of phlegm v Composed of the purest articles. / .Thrae , Lozenges contain >'no opium nor any deleterkjttt' : 1 drug, therefore the- most delicate can -take* 5 !!< them with perfect confidence. Their beneficialT effect,is speedy and certain. This oldi an*'" •• failing family remedy is daily recommended by -jiv the most eminent Physicians. (In use' nearly I 6o years). ... uem • MEDICAL TESTIMONY. • ; : . July 35th, 1877. 22, Cold Harbour ; Lanf r :': '- London. Sir, —Your Lozeages~*re -exocßeotj and their beneficial effect most reliable. I strongly , recommend''them in cases of cough. imrt , asthma. You are at liberty to state this'as'-iny y :u opinion, formed from many years’ experience. " ■'. ; J. Bringloe, M.R.C.S.L., L.S.A., L.M. , “ f ' Mr, T. Keating, Indian Dear Sir, —Having tried ; yonf Lozenges in India, I have much pleasure in testifying to their beneficial .effects in cases of 'indp&e&t j consumption, asthma and bronchial affections. / I have prescribed them largely, with the.best f results, ; r W. B. G, -i Apothecary, H.M.S. KEATING’S GOUGH LOZENGES. ar»i sold by all Chemists,’in tins of various sites, having the words,- “Keating’s' a Cough, • Lozenges” engraven on the government: Stamp. 5



Keating?? Worm Tablets. ! 1 •' 1 Keating’s Worm Tablets.. A PURELY VEGETABLE WEETMEAT * both in appearance and taste, most agreeable method of administering the only certain remedy for INTESTINAL or - THREAD WORMS.; It is.a perfectly safes'lil and mild preparation, and is especially adapted for children. Sold in ns by all Chemists and Druggists. ■ K c. ' r - Proprietor, THOS. KEATING, London ' ~. Export Cheriiist and Druggist. r v ' a 4 STEEDMAN’S SOOTHING POWDEIT FOR . : • V CHILDREN CUTTING TEETH. CAUTION TO PURCHASER,.. ~ The value of this well-known Family Medi. cine has been largely tested in all parts of the ■ world, and by all grades of society, for upwards. n .„ of FIFTY YEARS. Its well-earned ektdn. ’ 1 sive sale has induced SPURIOUS IMITA. TIONS, some of which in OUTWARD ~>• APPEARANCE so closely resenible the'on ginal as to have deceived many purchasers. The proprietor therefore feels it due to' thi; public to give a special caution against the use of SUCH IMITATIONS. , • t; . Purchasers are therefore requested carefully ■ to. observe the four following . distinctive, , characteristics, without which none genuine : Ist—fn every ca&e i the words : JOHN STEEDMAN, CHEMIST, WALWORTH,, . , SURREY,’ are engraved on the Governm’en * Stamp affix to each packet, . . . , 2nd—Eacn Single Powder has directions fa ‘ 0 ‘ the dpse,:and he words, John StKbdman/ ‘ ; •- Chemist, Walworth, Surrey,, printed thereohi' . 3rd —The name, Steedman, is always spelt - ' v with two EE’s,. ' , v:• ■■’ i 4th—The manufacture is carried on poldv , 1 at Walworth, Surrey. ; .. f , r-wlmK Sold in jackets by all Chemists anaHedi : ;,.!. ciiie Vendors. „ . 1*.„« Ksmpthorn, Prosser hhJO), .? ASK for POWELL’S BALSAM o' . ! ANISEED •. •