SHIPPING.

PORT OF LYTTELTON. Arrived. Yesterday. I \V. Parker, brigantine, from New York. Dunedin, schooner, from Invercargill. Pelican, schooner, from Picton. Tui, s.s., from Stonyhurst. To-day. Hawea, s.s., from the South. Arawata, s.s., from the North. Oreti, s.s., from Wellington.

Sailed. Yesterday. Tui, a.s., for Stonyhurst. To-day. Hawea, s.s., for the North. Arawata, s.s., for Melbourne, via the South. Cleared. To-day. Island City, barque, for Newcastle. SHIPPING TELEGRAMS. Auckland, Yesterday. Arrived —Annie Bow, Brigantine, from Timaru ; Magellan Cloud, brigantine, from Lyttelton. Wellington, Yesterday. Arrived —Jane Douglas from Kaikoura and Lyttelton ; Kiwi, from Napier and Castle Point. • Sailed —Penguin, for Nelson and West Coast; Oreti, for the South ; Mary Camp bell, brigantine, for Greymouth. Bluff, Yesterday. The Rotorua arrived at 11 a.m. She left Melbourne at 1.30 p.m. of the Ist. She experienced strong southerly winds during the passage. ,

MAIL NOTICES.

Mails close at the Ashburton Post Office, as follows :

For Christchurch and North at 5.30 a. m. 10 a.m., and sp. m., daily. For Chertsey Rakaia, &c., at 10 a. m. and 5 p.m. daily. For Dunedin, Tinwald, Winslow, Hinds, Coldstream, Rangitata, Orari, Winchester, and Geraldine, at 10 a.m. daily. For Temuka, at 6 a.m. and 10 a.m., daily. For Timaru and South, at 6 a.m., 10 a.in., and 4.20 p.m., daily. For Greenstreet, Ashburton Forks, Mount Somers, and Ashburton Gorge, on Tuesdays and Fridays, at 10.30 a m. For Ashton, Waterton and Longbeach, »t 4.30 p.m. daily. For Wakanui, Elgin, and Seafield, on Tuesdays and Fridays, at 6 a. m.

Mails arrive at the Ashburton Post Office — . From Christchurch and Rakaia at 10.20 a.m., 4.35 p.m., and 7.50 p.m. From Chertsey, Ac. at 10.25 a.m. daily. From Dunedin and intermediate places at 5.35 p. m. daily. Fromi Temuka and Timaru at 10.15 a.m. 5.35 p.m., and 8.15 p.m. daily. From Greenstreet, Ashburton Forks, Mount Somers, and Ashburton Gorge on Wednesdays and Saturdays at 3 p.m. From Ashton, Waterton, and Long beach at 10 a. m. daily. From Wakanui, Elgin, and Seafield on Tuesdays and Fridays at 2.30 p.m.

DAILY MEMORANDA.

AUCTION SALES. Thursday, December 9. Mr. T. Bullock, at the Prince Albert Boarding-house Furniture. Twelve o’clock.

Saturday, December 4. Quill and Co., at their Rooms—Sale of Privileges, Caledonian Sports. : MEETINGS, AMUSEMENTS, &c. To-Night, Tuesday, December 7. Degree Temple, Fortnightly Meeting, Templar Hall, at 7.30 p. m. Horticultural Society, Monthly Meeting, at Jacobson and Eyton’s office, at 8 o’clock. Ashburton Permanent Building and In vestment Society, Monthly Meeting, from G. 30 to 8.30 p.m. Parade Ashburton Rifle Volunteers, at 7 p.m. sharp. To-morrow, Wednesday, December 8.

Agricultural and Pastoral Association, Meeting of Members, at 7.30 p.m., re Railway Tariff. Concert and Ball, opening of the new hall, Tinwald. Concert to commence at 8 o’clock.

Thursday, December 9. Ashburton Library, Quarterly Meeting of

Members, at 7 p.m. Public Meeting, Wakanui Schoolroom, at 7. 30 p. m., re Railway Tariff. Monday, December 13. Borough Council, at Borough Council Chambers, at 7 o’clock. Tuesday, December 14. Amateur Dramatic Club, Town Hall, at 8 sharp. ________

TRAVELLERS’ GUIDE.

Trains Leave Ashburton for Christ church and intermediate stations at 6 a.m., 10.30 a.m., and (Express) 5.48 p.m.

Trains Leave Ashburton for Timaru and South, at 7 a.m., 10.36 a.m. (Ex press), and 4.50 p.m.—the latter pro ceeding no farther than Timaru. Trains Arrive at Ashburton from Christchurch at 10 24 a.m. (Express), 4.35 p.m., and 7.50 p.m. Trains Arrive at Ashburton from Timaru and South at 10.15 a.m., 5.34 p.m. (Express), and 8.15 p.m.

The Ashburton Guardian. TUESDAY, DECEMBER 7, 1880. The Pruning Knife.

TOWN EDITION. [lssued at 5 p. m. ]

One of the chief characteristics of the Ministry in power has been its pluck. When it was announced that the colony paid away a million of money every year in salaries, the settlers everywhere stood aghast, and quite a howl for re duction followed. Government did not fail to make these reductions, and every department of the Civil Service has suffered from the the ebb-tide that supervened. But while all hands favored reduction in general, there seemed scarcely anybody who was pre pared to allow that any reduction was at all necessary in his own particular quarter. However, notwithstanding all sorts of influences brought to bear on Government, the knife has been inserted, and an almost incredible num ber of civil servants have found that their aid to the colony’s business can be done without. This reduction will of course tell on the next financial statement, and though there are num bers of men who have received their walking tickets who must suffer hard ship to a greater or less extent by the change, there must inevitably be a saving to the colony. Signs, however, are not wanting that Government are not to be allowed to cut off the nurs lings of the Civil Service with impunity, and we will not be astonished if, during the next session, the Opposition espouse the cause of the civil servants, and attempt to make capital out of what they are pleased to call the injustice aud inhumanity of the reigning power. But it is well to bear in mind, when the champions of the civil servants tell their woful tales of suffering endured by the unfortunates, who, up to the advent of the Hall Ministry, made their living in the colony’s pay, and in doing work which re cent events have shown could very well have been left undone, or required only half the number of hands or heads to do it—that the welfare of the colony is the first consideration of the settler, and not the comfort of the civil ser vants. It will come well indeed from the apostles of extravagance that formed the following of Sir George Grey, to speak of injustice and inhumanity, when it is remembered that to them we owe finding our finances at low water, and almost bankruptcy staring us in the face. The good sense of the New Zealand constituencies will keep them straight in regard to who has saved the colony in its hour of peril, and to whose incorruptible integriity and sterling pluck they owe the firm policy of economy that has been followed. Mistakes have no doubt been made in this policy—the railway tariff, for instance—but these will no doubt be rectified, on maturer con sideration, when Government dis cover that they have been removing fruit-bearing branches as well as suckers in their anxiety to prune. Next year we expect a dissolution, and a general election will follow. It is then we expect to hear the “ injustice and inhumanity ” cry ; but we expect it to fall on ears that tingled at the exposures of the Grey Government’s failures and foolishness, and that can distinguish between the sophistry of defeated and dissappointed place-hunters, eager to seize on any chance to cajole the public, and the hard facts, stern and undeni able, that the history of the colony during the past two years has laid bare.

The Inquest on the Late Mr. C. C. Hubkell. —At the inquest yesterdays, after the Coroner had briefly explained the medical evidence, the jury returned the following verdict: —“ That the de ceased met his death from an overdose of laudanum, taken to obtain relief from neuralgic pain, the jurymen believing he was perfectly sane, and had no intention of destroying himself.” The School Treat. —At a special meeting of the School Committee last night, the members who had been out can vassing made a report. They had met with very fair success, but had not raised enough to enable the Committee to meet all expenses. A considerable portion of the town still remained to be canvassed, and it is hoped that those residents not yet visited will be liberal. Mr. E. G. Wright wrote, in reply to the Chairman’s letter, that he would be willing to meetany difference between the charge made by railway authorities for a special train to Lagmohr, and the sum the Committee were able to pay. Mr. Back wrote to say that the charges made by the railway were the lowest he was permitted to make, and he could not reduce the terms. The sum of Ll2 was voted to the purchase of toys, &c., to be given as prizes in the children’s sports, and the clerk was ordered to ask Mr. Shury to again kindly under take the purchase of the toys, the Com mittee’s experience of Mr. Shnry’s ability in this direction being very pleasant in deed. Further arrangements were de ferred till Friday’s meeting at which also ordinary business of the month would be transacted. The Revs. Beattie and Hands wrote expressing their willingness to take part in the annual examination, and to devote such time to it as they could afford. Rev. Mr. Keall wrote de clining to undertake a duty that had been well provided for by Government already. It was decided to add the names of the Rev. C. Fraser and Mr. Joseph Ward to the list of examiners. It >yas also decided to advertise for another mistress at a salary of LOO

Civil Cases.— The following civil cases were disposed of by the Justices to-day : —-Mutch and M'Kenzie v. Thorean— Claim L2 10s., and same v. W. M'Nair, LI 10s. Gd. Judgment in each case for plaintiffs by default. Stephens v. Boil -au —Claim L 5, judgment summons. Ad journed for a week. Stray Cattle.— -Constable Trcvellyan, out on the rampage last month, dropped down on quite a troop of horses that “ witfcled free” on the Wheatstone Drain road. To-day the owners of those horses were dealt with by the Mayor, Dr. Trevor, and Mr. 0. P. Cox, who occupied the bench. James Escott, two mares and two foals at large on the Wheatstone Drain road ; William Stephens, one horse ; and Patrick Tulley, two horses—all were fined ss. each and 7s. costs. Mr. Tully pled that he had obtained liberty to use the ground on which his horses were, but the Bench would have none of such plea, and. suggested that Mr. Tulley should ask Mr. Grigg to pay the fine.

Real Aristocracy,— Real aristocracy is the class eminent by personal qualities, and it goes without assertion, according to the proverb, that a certain quantity of power belongs to a certain quantity of faculty. Whoever wants more power than the legitimate attraction of his faculty is a politician, and must truckle for it. It is the whole game of society in the poli tics of the world. He will always contrive to seem, without, the trouble of being. The man of character has no taste for at tention, none for a contest of talents. He is wholly real ; he cannot he flattered, he cannot be insulted. Only himself can measure to please him. His words are things. He does not add to his denial the sanction of an oath. He says to the juror, “ You had your oath ; I put my oath into my affirmation. ” — Emerson. The By-Laws.— Mr. A. Thiele pegs out his horses with an iron tether-peg a yard long. He believes someone helped this long peg out of the ground, and let his horse loose. That unchristian act on the part of some mischievous person to-day cost Mr. Thiele a contribution of ss. to wards the borough exchequer.' John Worner’s horse was astray in Mona Square. The borough funds profit ss. by that fact. James Wilkie, Secretary to the Racing Club, rode down to the Mail office on the night before the first day’s races, to see a proof of the race card. He edited that card for an hour and a half. Meanwhile, his horse had no such inte resting literature to engage his atten tion, and took leave of his moorings. Con stable Neill found the animal and anchored him in Muir’s stables. Mr. Wilkie wanted to know why, in accordance with the by-laws, the horse was not taken to the pound. The police explained that stray saddle horses were more likely to be found during race times if sent to livery stables than if sent to the pound. Mr. Wilkie said lie bad four couriers out after that horse. The inevitable ss. had to be contributed. Ouida on English Humor.- —“ Ouida” undertakes, in the Whitehall Eerie if, to express her views on what James Payn, in the Nineteenth Century, called “ The Literary Calling.” She does not wholly agree with Mr. Payn in some of his con clusions. She writes: “Is there any thing so desolate in the whole range of human inanities as forced or self-con scious witticisms 1 And humor is not wit, though the English mind too often con fuses the one with the other. True humor, such as is contained often in the cartoons of Tenniel and the social drawings of Du Maurier, is by no means wit, which is a thing more subtle, more elegant and more incisive. Ido not think that the English public, as a rule, understand wit at all; they like broad farce, and even of humor there is little trace among the writers now ; a dull bufoonery, a Dickens-and water are the too general substitute. For all the dreary things under the sun is that set clown’s grin which the English mind calls ‘ humor. ’ The American humor is rather the grin on the face of a corpse ; it is real humor, though of a ghastly and grim sort.” German Officers and their Men.— If the weather in Germany has been any thing like that which we have had in England during the last two or three nights the troops employed in the autumn manoeuvres will have had a fair trial of some of the hardships of war. A bivouac in pouring rain is a set off to the pomp and circumstances which attend great military scenic displays. Yet, like most of the troubles of life, a rainy bivouac sometimes proves not so very bad as it sounds to be. In the first place the men are protected from the wind by high walls of straw or faggots, and in the next place they have issued to them sufficient wood to keep up huge fires during the night. The men are all young, and manage to shorten the dull hours of night by jokes and choruses, which are often heard up to a very late hour. Nor must it be supposed that the German officers share the priva tions of the men ; on the contrary, if there is no hut or shed available, the men build huts for the officers, who very often entertain a considerable number of their friends. Indeed, there is a rather curious but marked distinction between the rela tions of German and English officers to their men in war. The German soldier is eminently helpful, the English soldier is trained to ho helpless. The German soldiers take care of their officers, who certainly deserve it by their knowledge of leadership. The English soldier, on the contrary, expects his officers to take care of him. —Pall Mall Gaxette.

Tinwald Temperance Hall. —By an advertisement in another column, our readers are reminded that the newly erected hall, belonging to the Temperance Hall Company, in Tinwald, willbe opened to-morrow evening, by a concert and ball, which promises to be a great success, judging from the names of the ladies and gentlemen who have kindly consented to assist, and also from the energetic manner in which the committee entrusted with the arrangements are working. They seem to be doing all in their power to make the opening celebration a credit to themselves and the company they repre sent. In connection with the above, we might here state that it is only seven months since this plucky little company was first thought of. Since that time they hare succeeded in establishing them selves as a Joint Stock Company, and they have purchased a section of land, and built their hall thereon. The Company is a small one, their capital being limited to L 250, but they have succeeded in dis posing of about 175 shares, and they will open the hall nearly out of debt, in fact the disposal of about twenty-five more shares at LI each, would place the Com pany entirely out of debt, and this speaks well for the manner in which the pro visional directors have conducted their business. The hall is sniall, being only thirty-five feet by twenty, or the same size as the Ashburton Templar Hall, but we have no doubt it will be large enough for the requirements of Tinwald for some time to come. It was designed by Mr. Shearer, of Tinwald, and built by Mr. D. Teppitts, of the same place, who, not withstanding the lowness of his tender, has executed the work well, and deserves great credit for the honest manner in which he has carried out the whole of his contract. We believe the hall is intended to be let for all purposes for which it may be suitable. We .cannot close our re marks without a word of praise to the gentle man who has up to the present time filled the dual post of secretary to the Company, and chairman of the directors —viz, Mr. Thomas Williams. It is mainly due to his untiring devotion that the Com pany is able to report such progress ; iii fact the members all agree, that but for him the Company would most likely have died in its infancy. We wish the Com pany every success. '

A Bye-law that is no Good. —At Court to-day—-before three justices, in cluding the Mayor—-it was decided that no one can bo prosecuted for having a horse or other animal tied up on his own or other private property —that is, under by-law 54, which runs as follows : —-“If any cattle shall be found upon any. land within the Borough, not separated by a sufficient fence from any street or public place within the Borough without any person having charge of such cattle the owner of such cattle shall be guilty of an offence,” etc. A man named Monro had tied up a horse to a dray standing on one of the timber sites in East street. It had been removed from the dray by some one, and when Monro sent his son for the horse the lad could not find it, and came home without it. The constable who gave evidence said the horse had apparently stood a day and a night without food, and it was this fact that induced the information being laid. As no charge of cruelty was made, and as the Bench regarded by-law 54 as ultra vires of the Borough Council, the case was dismissed. Monro lived fifteen miles away from the township, and the police did not think the case of sufficient im portance to make him do ajsecond journey in connection with it.

Scandal in High Life. — Asad story concerning one of our oldest and best endowed earldoms will shortly see the light. It seems that a peer, lately gathered to his fathers, whose name he did not endow with great lustre, is now alleged to have been married, and to have had a family at the time he made the only •marriage the world has yet recognised or heard of. The result of this alleged fact, which from all I hear seems but too cer tain to be established, is that the peer’s widow will cease to be Lady H., and will become plain Miss 8., while her son and daughters, who have recently been brought out in society, will be placed in a very painful position. The young ladies will, however, as I learn, still retain the fortune of L 12,000 a year each, left to them by their grandfather, but their brother will lose an earldom, and with it an income of LOO,OOO a year. I understand that the Queen, who takes the kindliest interest in the poor lady who has been so abused, will, in the event of the worst expecta tions being realised, probably give her another title in lieu of that whereof she will bo deprived in so shocking a manner. Vanity Fair.

CABLE NEWS.

LATEST FROM EUROPE.

{Pet Pallet's Agency.) Gold. London, Dec. 4. Large withdrawals of gold are being made from the Bank of England for America. Fiery Meeting of the Land League. London, Dec. G. A largely attended meeting, under the auspices of the Irish Land League, was held yesterday at Waterford. Most of the prominent agitators were present, and addressed the meeting. Mr. Parnell made a speech on the occasion, and spoke bitterly against the action of the present Government, accusing it of having con spired against the rights of the people of Ireland. The U.S. National Debt. Washington, Dec. G. President Hayes has addressed a mes sage to Congress, in which he recommends that the National debt of the United States should be refunded into 3 or 3£ per cant, bonds, in place of those now bearing interest at from 4 to G per cent. Icebound Grain. New York, Dec. G. Owingto the extreme severity of the win ter, 5,000,000 bushels of grain are now icebound in Lake Erie. An Ironclad for China. Shanghai, Dec. 6. News has been received that the Chinese Government has ordered a most formidable ironclad to be constructed at Stotten, port in the Baltic.

AUSTRALIAN.

(Per Reuter's Agency.) The Cricketers Feted. Melbourne, Dec. 6. The Melbourne cricketers welcomed the Australian team by inviting them to a concert and supper. A grand display of fireworks took place on the occasion.

NEW ZEALAND

(Per Press Asnociation.) Trap Accident. Auckland, To-day. This morning, a daughter of Alfred Buckland was driving from her house, when the horse bolted and the carriage was overturned. Miss Buckland received a kick on the face from the horse, and is seriously injured. Her father left Auck land this morning by the steamer for Kaipara. The Compulsory Clauses of the Education Act. Government have approved of the re gulations prepared by the City School Committee for the employment of the police in enforcing the compulsory educa tion clauses. The Governor bows his Acknowledge ment. The Governor, replying to the city’s addresses, expressed his strong sense of the trouble taken and the exertion made on the occasion of his reception, and con veys his personal acknowledgement both of those efforts and of the cordial response they obtained from the inhabitants. An Offer. Dunedin, To-day. The Board of Governors of the High School offered the post of German master of the High School to Dr. Bellau, of Christchurch, at a salary of L3OO.

LATE CABLE NEWS.

(Per s.s. Rotorua, via the Bluff.)

[“ Akgus” Special.] London, Nov. 27.

The sum of L4OO has been subscribed by the rowing public of England towards the LI,OOO required for the proposed race on the Thames between Hanlan and Lay cock, to take place in six weeks’ time. Hanlan has consented to wait until Tues day for the balance 'of-, tlje money, and if it is subscribed the race will be arranged. The Sportsman newspaper is receiving subscriptions, and contributions are ex pected to be received from Australia. If Laycock wins, the money will be returned to the donors. Nov.. 29. Earl Uufferin, the British Ambassador at St. Petersburg, returns to Russia with intructions to arrange the Asian questions which have been the subject of negotiation between Russia and England. Mr. Boycott, a victim of the Land League agitation in Ireland, has quitted his residence near Lough Mask, County Mayo, for England.

[“Age” Special.] London, Nov. 27. The prospectus of the Panama Canal scheme, projected by Baron De Lesseps, has been published. The proposal is to

construct a navigable waterway through the isthmus, connecting thereby the Atlantic and Pacific oceans. The syndi cate formed has undertaken to provide the necessary preliminary expenses. The Orange expedition despatched from the'.Province of Ulster to the disturbed district at Ballinrobo, in the County of Mayo, has x-eturned. •, The object of the expedition was to reap the farm of Mr. Boycott, who had been threatened by the Land League. It was feared that their presence would lead to a collision with the peasantry, but owing to the precau tions taken by. the military, a largo force of which was present, this danger was averted. Intelligence has been received of a series of outrages committed by the native chief at New Calabar, a district on the Guinea coast, West Africa, near the bight of Benin. It is reported that a large number of natives have been butchered, and that several white traders have also fallen victims. Nov. 29. Another victory has been gained by the Cape forces in Basutoland, now acting under the direction of Brigadier- General Clarke. A body of troops despatched against the native stronghold at Loridn. where the Basutos wei'e mustered in .force,..succeeded in storming the place and inflicting severe loss on the enemy. Trickctt, the. Australian oarsman, is suffering from indisposition. His health has not been good for some days, but his illness is not considered of a serious nature. A match for L2OO a-side was rowed to-day over the Thames Champion course between Trickctt, of Sydney, and Wallace Ross, of St. John’s, New Bruns wick. Trickett was not in his host form, hut he succeeded in easily boating his opponent, winning by some lengths. During the race a foul occurred, and upon an appeal to the referee it was decided to row the race over again 011 Saturday. Nov. 30. Mr. Goschen, the Ambassador-Extra ordinary to the Porte, will visit Loudon immediately, Iti'order to confer with the Cabinet on the measures deemed neces sary for bringing about a settlement of the difficulty between Greece and Turkey, and to secure the fulfilment of the promised reforms in Asia Minor.

How I was Made a Good Templar.

(From the Waimate Times.)

Air Editor, Sir, —According to promise, as made ■to the worthy' gentlemen who converted me to discipleship of the Tem perance cause, I duly attended at the hall on Thursday night for initiation into the mysteries of Good Tcinplary, with the following result:—On presenting myself at the door I was conducted to the ante room and left in charge of the doorkeeper, who eyed mo somewhat suspiciously, and refused any further conversation with me beyond telling me that I would have to wait. This I did, and after a certain amount of slating and singing had been carried on inside, one of the brethren came out of the lodge-room with a slip of paper in his hand, and, after a careful scrutiny of my person, assured me “I was the meanest.'‘specimen of. humanity that had ever been presented to him for renovation,” and that “ if I had been a week —a day even an hour later in coming it would have been his painful duty to have turned me away as hopeless. As it was there were a number of ques tions I would have to answer. If I did so to his satisfaction there might be hope for me yet. ” He then read off his paper— “Do you believe all publicans will go to perdition ?” I replied that “I sincerely hoped so, leastime all them that doctored their grog and charged a shilling for a pint of beer.”

Whereat he fell upon my neck and wept, assuring me that “ my heart was in the right place.” His next question was, “ What amount of ready cash have you about your per son 1”

After carefully exploring all my pockets, I announced the sum of 12s. Gd., which seemed to be satisfactory, as he proceeded to explain to me that it was very expensive work rescuing such miser able wretches as myself from perdition, and that fees and dues were required from candidates and members to carry on the good work. The ordinary fee was 3s. Gd., but for such a hard case as mine he would be failing in his duty to the lodge if he accepted less than 10s., which sum I handed oyer to him, ruefully ruminating on the number of lovely pints it repre sented. He then left me in charge of the doorkeeper, who playfully poked me in the ribs and whispered, “ I knew they’d have you when they saw the greed. ”

A sister and brother called Marshal and Deputy then came out, and, taking me by the hand, one on each side* led me into the lodge-room ; as soon as we entered the door the following ode being struck up by all hands : The Templars are gath’ring around by the fire, We have’lifted them out qf the mud and the mire [ Though once they were swipers we saved them from beer, And behold them assembled to welcome you here.

On its conclusion, I was halted in front of the boss Templar, who told me I was welcome to their fraternal home, and that if I looked around me I would behold men who were once as bad, or nearly so, as myself. I did look round, and scanned the assemblage, but as first impressions are sometimes deceptive, I will not detail mine, but wait till my acquaintance assumes a more matured form before expressing my opinions.

The Boss then told me there was an obligation required of me, and I repeated after him as follows :—“ I promise to leave off drinking sho-oak, gin, whisky, and all other swipes, and to oppose all applications for new licenses by whomso ever made, thereby saving the torrid regions from over population in the shape of people whose fortunes have been made in the drink tradio, and to let the said people have a comfortable innings in this world in consideration of what they will have to endure in the next.”

He then told me there were signs and words whereby Templars knew each other, and these he would now explain to me. The first sign was to elevate the right hand to the level of your mouth, giv ing the little finger a quick upward cant as if a nobbier had been got outside of, and meant “ Will you have a drink?”

The answering sign was to place the fore-finger of your left hand on the side of your nose and the password was “ Not for Joe.”

He then took me by the hand and called me “Brother ” while all the mem bers gathered around us, A considerable amount of whispering and disputing here took place amongst the great guns, and there seemed to he a hitch somewhere, which was explained by the Patriarch, who stated that as all the water had run out of their cistern they were unable to immerse me in the usual manner but “he thought the difficulty could be got over by : jugging ’ me.”

Of course I had no idea, what this meant but assured the genial old gentleman that “jugging was the principal inducement that had brought me forward, and that if I had thought there was te be no jugging I never would have come. ” •

On this he clapped me on the back and told me “ he was sure he was right, and that he always was right,” and inserting the forefinger of his right hand between my neck and shirt-collar bent my head forward with his left hand, while one of his supporters poured a jug of cold water down my back. Creation! but it did make me shiver. However, I was allowed no time to think

over it, as they all joined hands, forming a circle, with mo in the. centre, and com menced the following song of welcome : —- Welcome, welcome, Silly Willy, Welcome, welcome, Swiper Billy. We are glad to see you here, Safe from whisky and from beer. Having paid me this graceful tribute of respect, a recess was called, and an ad journment made to the coffee-room for refreshments.—l am, etc., Bill Stumps.

THE ASHBURTON GUARDIAN, TUESDAY, DECEMBER 7, 1880.



Special Advertisements. THE BEST VALUE for READY MONEY IS THE MEN’S) CLOTHING (AND BOYS’) MANUFACTURED BY THE NEW ZEALAND CLOTHING FACTORY, which can be purchased at their Retail Branches, now established all over New Zealand. The Garments arc thoroughly shrunk. The Fit and Style are perfect. The Workmanship is equal to bespoke. The Trimmings are of superior quality and strength. The Tweeds are of the very best descrip tion. The Stock is the largest in the Southern Hemisphere. The tall, short, lean, and stout can be equally well fitted. The Goods are all marked in plain figures. The system of business is to exchange every article that does not give satis faction. And, in addition to all these advantages, you can purchase A SINGLE GARMENT AT THE WHOLESALE PRICE. Mercery, Hats, Shirts, Ties, Scarfs, Bags, Portmanteaus, Rugs, and Blankets at Wholesale Prices. THOUSANDS OF DISCERNING CUSTOMERS Testify that the New Zealand Clothing Factory’s Garments are the Very Best Value for Ready Money. Ashburton Branch ; EAST STREET. 910 WM. SPARROW, Manager.



Special Advertisements. O. Carstens & Co. (Late Weston’s), PROSPECT BUILDINGS, Tobacconist, fancy goods, AND STATIONERY. Meerschaum Pipes, G.B.D. Pipes Nailrod, Twist, and Vanity Fair Tobacco Musical Instruments, etc., etc. Haircutting, Shaving and Shampooing. EAST STREET, ASHBURTON. 520*



NOTICE TO ADVERTISERS. All orders for insertion of advertise ments must be written legibly on the face of the advertisement. When no order is given the advertisement will be inserted until countermanded, and charged accord ingly- All notices of Births, Marriages, or Deaths must be accompanied by the sig nature of the sender, as & guarantee of good faith. All advertisements and business letters to be addressed The Manager ; literary communications should be addressed to The Editor.



The negro’s definition of bigotry is as good and as inclusive as that of Webster s Dictionary. “A bigot!” said he ; “ why he’s a man who knows too much for one man and not quite enough for two.” “ Will yon love me then as now ?” He had been urging her to don a bathing suit and waddle down to the water with him like a duck. Ho took her question under ad visement, and she concluded to bathe on the sly.



Wanted. WA NTED, —A HOUSEMAID. Apply, Quill’s Commercial Hotel. 688 TIT ANTED—By a young respectable VY woman, a SITUATION as HOUSE MAID or WAITRESS in a Hotel. Country preferred. 667 WANTED— A Young Woman as GENERAL SERVANT for a country hotel. Apply, Oflice of this Paper. 668 WANTED to Hire or Buy, on easy terms of payment, a Light Second hand BUGGY. Apply, Office of this Paper. 697 ‘ANTED KNOWN, That HENRY’S PORTRAIT ROOMS, Saunders’ Buildings, East street, Ashburton, are open DAILY, from 9 a.m. till 5 p.m. Portraits taken in any weather. Great Reduction in Price. 606 WANTED KNOWN—That a Church W of England minister’s wife writes that she saves Ten Shillings a Fortnight by using Harper Twelvctrees’ .Villa Washer, Wringer, and Mangier, com bined ; and, although she permits no rubbing, the clothes are beautifully white, and much cleaner than when done by hand, while the saving in mending has been astonishing. Sold by J. HERN, Range Maker and Importer, corner of Manchester and Tuam streets, Christ church; Price—£9 10s. 700 WANTED KNOWN. SOMERSET LIVERY AND BAIT STABLES. JW. M'RAE bogs to inform the . public that he has taken the above Stables from Mr. Bossenberg, and is making extensive repairs. Buggies and saddle horses on hire. . Lowest prices and best attention. 908c—286g



WANTED KNOWN—Just arrived from England—Christmas, New Year, and Birthday Cards. New Zealand Illustrated Annual, Young Ladies’ Jour nal, and Bow Bells, Is. Gd. each. Family Herald and Family Reader, Is. each, and all other Magazines supplied at Christ church Prices. Colonial and European Newspapers, School Books, Stationery,&c. A visit solicited. L. F. Ahdkewes, East street, near Lancaster’s Butchery. 527 in Mm 11 m n urn ir irirnnrießaMnßgMaßinßaßaaßßgßm—■ Meetings. 10.G.T.— THE FORTNIGHTLY . MEETING of the Unity DEGREE TEMPLE will be held THIS EVENING in the Templar Hall. THuMAS WIL LIAMS, D.T. 701 LIBRARY. The Next QUARTERLY MEETING of Members takes place on THURSDAY NEXT, December 9th, at 7 p.m. H. C. JACOBSON, 698 Hon. Sec. Ashburton- agricultural & PASTORAL ASSOCIATION. A GENERAL MEETING of MEM BERS will be held at the Town Hall, Ashburton, on WEDNESDAY next, Bth December, at half-past Seven o’clock, to consider the question of the Railway Tariff. GEORGE JAMESON, 685 Secretary. HORTICULTURAL SOCIETY. mHE usual MONTHLY MEETING i will be held at Messrs. . Jacobson and Eyton’s Office TO-NIGHT, Dec. 7th, at 8 p.m. S. E. POYNTZ, 692 Hon. Sec. ROAD DISTRICT. A PUBLIC MEETING will be held at the Wakanui Schoolroom on THURS DAY, the 9th instant, at 7.30 p.m., to consider the Railway Tariff question. H. T. WINTER, Chairman Wakanui Road Board. Ashburton, Dec. 2, 1880. 678



Amusements. To-Morrow. TIN WALD TEMPERANCE HALL. THE CONCERT and Plain Dress BALL to celebrate the opening of the above New Hall will take place TO-MORROW EVENING, WEDNESDAY, December 8, 1880, at 8 p.m. The chair will bo occupied by Mr. Joseph Ward. The following Ladies and Gentlemen have kindly consented to assist iit the Concert, viz. —Mrs. Craighead, Mrs. Vaughan, Mrs. Teppitts, Mrs. Dunn, Miss Sanderson, and Messrs. Craighead, Garrison, Branson, Minnis, .Jephson, Jacobson, Gates, Wilson, Shearer, Reeve, uk! Dunn. Admision—Front Seats, 25.; Back Seats, Is. The Ball immediately afterwards, in ;he Ball Room, 100 feet long, beautifully I lecorated. A first-class Band and an iffacient Master of Ceremonies have been mgaged. Admission to the Ball—Gentlemen, 2/6. Don’t Forget— TO-MORROW NIG HT! ! ! ■ 641 Money. MONEY ,TO LEND. rRUST MONE VS—£2 000, £4OO, and £250. These sums are now ready or investment on real security, at current ates of interest. ■ ; P. P. O REILLY, i 99c-226g Solicitor, Tancred street. . Gazette in Bankruptcy. V. E. The Ashburton Guardian a Gazette for all notices under the 'obtors and Creditors Arte



Public Notices 17IURNISHED APARTMENTS for: a j Lady and Gentleman, with atten dance ; or Board and Residence for Two Single Gentlemen. References required. Address, Box 42, Post Office, Ashburton. ' 699 NOTICE. NEIGHBORING Farmers will please take notice that the WOOL BRAND on the Westerfield Sheep is now CHANGED from C.R. to two bars with dot on each side, •//. 695 D. OLIVER. NOTICE. ALL DEBTS owing to C. G. Hawdon, of Westerfield (who has left for England), are requested to be PAID at once to D. OLIVER, On the Station. December 6tb, 1880. 696 REE VACCINATION EVERY SATURDAY AFTERNOON, from Two to Three, at Cambridge's Medical Hall, East street. 689 PORT ANT TO FARMERS. Osborne Harvesting Machinery. Osborne Harvester and Binder, to bind with both string and wire, price L7O. Ditto ditto, with iron road wheel, and. patent lifting apparatus, price L 76. String attachments to fit on old wire Binders, price L 0 10s. • N.B.—No charge for fitting if sent to our store. Osborne No. 6 Side Delivery Reapers and Mowers. Osborne No. 6 Tilter or Back Delivery Reapers and Mowers. Osborne No. 5 'lowers. EXTRAS FOR ALL .. THE ABOVE MACHINES KEPT IN STOCK. Sole Agents in New Zealand— ROBERT WILKIN & CO., New Zealand Wool Stores, 624 Christchurch.



McDongalTs Carbolic Sheep Dip IS the Best and Safest in the Market. A orue specific for Scab, instantly destroying Ticks, Lice, and all Insects, effectually cleansing and stimulating the growth of the Fleece. Sold in 101 b. and 201 b. tins, and 501 b. kegs, by EGBERT WILKIN & CO., New Zealand Wool Stores, 027 Christchurch.



mHE KELLYS ! THE KELLYS ! 1 JL THE KELLYS !! ! Coming, Coming, Coming ! Glorious success in Christchurch ! Over 100 Life-size Views of the Kelly Outlaws. Hundreds of other Views of the principal Cities of the World, including the Glasgow Riots. Admission —One Shilling ; and a Pre sent to every Visitor. 494 . [card. J TIHEODORE B. JACOBSEN AND O. PEEZ, ARCHITEC T S. Note office—, HEREFORD STREET, WEST, Christchurch. 571 Agricultural Liens. THE Undersigned are open to receive applications for CASH ADVANCES on Growing Crops. . 610 P. CUNNINGHAM & CO. Wool Season, 1880-1881. THE Undersigned are prepared to make LIBERAL CASH ADVANCES (Free of Commission) on all WOOL placed in their hands for SALE in the London or Continental Markets. We are offering special inducements to shippers of wool to our London Agents, having made arrangements whereby the wool will receive such an amount of attention prior to sale that farmers can calculate upon exceptionally good prices being procured. Insurances on Clip can be effected from sheep’s back to London. Woolpacks supplied at most reasonable prices. For further particulars apply to P. CUNNINGHAM & CO. 611 Christchurch. For Sale. Q RASS STRIPPERS. TWO SCOTTS’ GRASS STRIPPERS FOR SALE CHEAP. GSB SAUNDERS BROTHERS. FOR SALE, BY TENDER. THE GOODWILL and PLANT of a ; first-class LIVERY STABLE, to gether, with a Line of Royal Mail Coaches in full running'order. Tenders are invited for the purchase of a Coaching and Livery Business, carrying, the Royal Mails between the Orari Rail way Station and the Waihi Bush, via Geraldine, together with all - necessary plant, including Two Coaches, capable of caitying twenty-five passengers 'each; Double and Single Buggies, Brake i, Twelve superior Horses, Harness, Ac. There: is an opening for an enterprising man, seldom to be mot with. .The busi ness has been established five years, and has been, and is, steadily increasing. Satisfactory reasons given for disposal. Tenders to close at NOON on DECEM BER 31st, 1880, to be endorsed “ Tenders for Coaching Business,” and forwarded to the undersigned, from whom all, particu lars may be obtained. POYNTZ & CO., Ashburton ; Or, KENNEDY & CARTER, Proprietors, 628 Geraldine.



Poyntz & Co. HA YE FOR SALE," on advantageous and easy terms of payment, the following TOWN AND SUBURBAN PROPERTIES:— A good five-roomed House, on quarter acre of land, within three or four chains of\the East Town Belt. . A compact four-roomed House, with one acre of land, well fenced. Three quarters of an acre laid down as a paddock, " ' A nice four-roomed House on half-acre of land, near the Gas Works, well finished throughout. Town Sections, 742,'743, 465, 468, 4G7. Town 5 Section 711, upon which is erected a capital four-roomed Hoxise fatted with every convenience. A two:roomed House, with outbuild ings, on a quarter acre, well fenced and planted, on N. E. Belt., MONEY for investment, on approved security, in suras of £SO and upwards, at Current rates 595



Lost. £1 Eeward. LOST, from Wakamii, on Monday, November Ist, One Chestnut HACK, branded HD on the left shoulder, with hollow back. Last seen in the direction of Barrhill.—Anyone returning him to Friedlander Bros, will receive the above Eeward. 487 Sporting. & TROTTING CLUB. PRELIMINARY PRO JRAMME (Subject to alterations.) DECEMBER 16th, 18 80. List of Officers: Starter. N. M‘Lean, Esq.; M. Stitt, Esq.; Hon. Treasurer, O. Digby Esq.; Hon. Sec., H. 0. Jacobson, Esq ; Handicappers, Messrs. Clerk of the Course, S. Saunders, Esq. First Race to start at 1 p. m. 1. Maiden Trot, in saddle, of aovs; for all horses which have never won £5 in public. Three miles. No weight less than 10 stone. Entrance 15s. 2. Maiden Harness Trotting Race, of sovs. Four miles,. To be ran in two-wheeled vehicles of. any descrip tion. Entrance 15s. 3. Ashburton Champion Handicap Trotting Race, in saddle, of, soys. Entry 1 sov.; .acceptance ■ I sov. Four miles. Weights 12 stone 4 pound. . 4. The Buggy Tournament Handicap, of four miles, for sovs. Entry 1 sov.; acceptance 1 sov. Any four wheeled vehicle owned by a member of the Club allowed tq enter. 5. Welter Handicap Rack, of sovs,. Three miles. Entry log..- To.be ridden by members of the Club. No weight less than 15 stone. RULES AND REGULATIONS. Entries for Nos. 1,2, and sto be made by 5 p.m. on Monday 13th December, 18S0. '



Nominations for Nos. 3 and 4 will be received up till same time., .■ 'f Handicaps will be declared ‘.on the ground, and acceptances to be made within fifteen minutes after the posting of the handicaps. - No horse will be allowed to compete at this meeting unless owned and commonly resident in the district previous to No vember Ist. In any race three horses must start to qualify the first horse to claim the full stake. If only two start, one-half of the stake will be given, and no money will be awarded for a walk-over. Five per cent, deducted from all prizes for expenses. _ Full programme will be published in the issue of the Ashburton GuAKDiAN on Tuesday, December 7th. H. C. JACOBSON, 649 Hon. Sec. Sports. ASHBURTON CALEDONIAN SOCIETY’S ANNUAL GAT HE RING; 5 THE: SECOND; ' Annual Sports Meeting of the Ashburton CALEDONIAN SOCIETY will be held in the Agricultural and Pastoral Asssociation’s Show Ground, Ashburton, on MO N DA Y AND TUESDAY, December 27th and 28th, When the prizes enumerated below will be competed for. Judges for the Sports: For Pipe Music —Messrs. Donald M'Lean, A M'Coll, M'Kinnon, and J. Mac Lean Dunn. For Quoit Throwing —Messrs. G. M. Robinson and George Kidd. For Caber, Stone, and Hammer Throwing —Messrs. Stitt, Hay 'Smith, and W. Anderson, For Highland Dancing and Best Dressed High lander Messrs. Donald M'Lean,; M'Kinnon, Dr. Stuart and A. M‘Coll. For Irish Dancing Messrs. John Boyle, John Black, H. Cullen, and D. Fitzgerald. For Vaulting and Jump ing—Messrs. Reid, Quill, and Millar. Racing Han dicappers—-Messrs. Ander son and Digby. Judge—Mr. M. Stitt. Starter—Mr. S. Saunders.



PROGRAMME OF SPORTS: zst prize 2nd prize £ s. £ s. 1. Pipe Music —Pibrochs... 4ro“i 10 ~ Reels & Strathspeys 4 .0 • 110 2. Quoits ... ... ' ..; 10" ,0 10 3. Open Handicap Hurdle Race, ■44oyds, 6 hurdles 3 0 .1 10 4. Handicap Hurdle Race, : * , for Boys, 440yds, for boys not over 16 ... 1 0 0 10, 5. Running High Jump ... 1 0 010 G. Running High Jump, for boys under 16 ... ... 010 0 5 7. Tossing the Caber ... 2 0 1 0 8. Standing High Jump ... 1 0 - 010 9. 100 Yards Race, open 2 0 1 0 10.. Highland Reel ; ... 3 0 110 11. Highland Fling ... 3 0 110 12. Sword Dance ... ... 3 0 1 10- Entrance Money, Five per Cent, on amount of first prize. Entries can be made with the Secretary ) up to Eleven o’clock on the. day of the > sports, for such events as have not come -' off, except-for events Hos., 22, entries for which-must be in by’hodn on the Bth December. For these cap events the handicaps will be declared :' on the : 15th December, and acceptances; must be in the Secretary’s hands by noon of the 22nd December. ... Members are reminded that their tickets. expired on the 30th September last, and that their subscriptions are now due. These ate to be paid at'once td- ; the Secretary or Treasurer. ' ■■■ - .. ■ J. ; MaoLEAN .DUNN,. ; . 665 Horn Secretary. ; MR. GAYGILL,of Walker , street, Christchurch, is AUTHORISED r to CAHTASS for Advertisements for Tata " Ashburton Guardian,