Matthew
The last few months had been up and down for JD, between his drinking and his.. Issues.. He really had not been all there. Now, that was still the case. JD was still p most nights with nightmares, he found himself at the speakeasy more and more and up pacing at night but.. 

His mind had cleared somewhat.. Just a bit since he passed out the night before at 7 pm, and had slept clean through to 6pm the next day. It was the first time he had a full nights sleep in months 

11 hours was a lot of sleep but it was a lot of sleep he needed. 

When he came in at 6pm into the den, he rubbed his eyes and sat down next to Dallas at the kitchen table. "Hey.." He said as ran his hand over his face. 

"Sorry.. I ain't mean to sleep that long."
John
Honest to God, Dallas was awful worried about JD these days. Killin' that werewolf had really done somethin' to JD; and it wasn't no good, neither. As much as Dallas wanted werewolves dead and all, he couldn't imagine that a task like that had been easy on JD. His coworker, his *Friend* Was a whole lot softer and kinder than he could ever be. JD was usually all smiles, like a solid light at the end of a darkened tunnel. He was sunshine, he was crackin' jokes during a hard work day, and he was warmth. God knows, JD had made Dallas feel a warmth in his belly, unbidden and terrifying a feeling as it was. 

Even though JD oversleepin' was a little bit of a scare, he figured that he might really be needin' all that sleep. It was a relief when he heard the tell-tale rustlin' of JD climbin' out of bed, shuffling to grab his clothes, and out to the kitchen table where he sat. 

"Don't 'pologize," He mumbled under his breath. Wayne was sat on his knee, eating up something that looked vaguely beige and soft. He was grateful that Joanna came by and whisked the baby away, and he twisted to face JD more now. "Ain't nothin' wrong with sleepin' in." He cleared his throat, looking out to the slowly setting sun. "...You alright?"
Matthew
JD looked down at little Wayne on his friend's knee and gave him a little wave. That baby was something else, real smart, and real cute. He worried about him a lot, what with the wolves and all, after what had happened to his mama, he worried they would come back for Wayne too, and for Joanna in conjunction. 

He worried about Dallas too, he didn't think Dallas worried enough about himself. He was real strong, and real capable, but God was he under a lot of pressure with everything. 

He shrugged his shoulders, "It was gettin' dark when I went to sleep, and gettin' dark when I got up, so for a second I ain't think I slept at all but.. I felt too rested for that to be true.." He said as he took in a deep breath. 

He looked to Joanna and smiled as she walked past, grabbing the baby and he moved his chair a little bit closer to Dallas'. "I think so.. I'm feelin'.. Better I guess." He said as he thought for a moment. "Can't lie and say I suddenly feel great what with everythin' but.. I'm sober.. I'm rested.. So I feel alright, given everything.." He said looking down at his hands, and then back up to Dallas. 

"How're you doin'? You feelin'... Okay.. Recently?"
John
Dallas stretched out his leg and rubbed the back of his neck as he got adjusted in his seat proper. The world had been... Hard. In all honesty, he hadn't even let himself *Grieve*. Addie had been all he had of blood left in this world, and she was gone. He thought she'd be safer here with him, out of the city, away from them boys she was always gettin' into trouble with. But she'd come back at the wrong time, his prayin' had been answered too damn late. 

His only little sister, the one thing left in this world... Well, she'd barely been recognizable when they'd picked her up off the floor, face mauled to hell and blood seeping from the cracks in her skull. Dallas hadn't let himself feel a damn thing besides the burning, aching *Rage* That roared like an inferno. Reminded him of them damn coal haints that had been pesterin' him so. 

Wayne needed him. JD needed him. Joanna needed him. The coalition, Alma, the *Town*.... Well, they all needed him as part of the team, didn't they? Another soldier in the army, another gun, another bullet. "I'm awright," He mumbled under his breath, because he gotta be alright. Otherwise, he was doomed to fall apart, wasn't he? 

"Been worried 'bout you," He told him, voice real measured and slow. "Ever since... The sheriff and all." He bit down on the inside of his cheek. "Ain't been the same since then, JD. Can't say I blame ya." Not when the beast turned back into a man, right before their eyes.
Matthew
He studied Dallas' face for a moment before he nodded, and looked down at his hands again. "Right yeah.." He said as he took in a deep breath. 

"I think I been doin' a little too much drinkin' if I'm bein' honest.." He said as he scratched the back of his neck. "That can't help.. Marched into the mayors office the other day, demandin' those kids. Said I was gonna build them a fuckin' room and that I'd kill the wolf babies if I had to." He shook his head. 

"What the hell is that? I ain't gonna take those kids, and God knows they ain't gonna give em' to me anyway, thankfully." He said taking in a deep breath. 

"Ain't my place to even ask for em', ain't my house. I ain't even think about what I was doin' when I did it. I ain't no baby killer." He said looking exasperated. 

"I gotta dry out." He said with a grumble. "Ain't good for me and it ain't good for you.. I'm real worried about you. Got enough on your plate without me stumblin' around actin' like a fuckin' idiot." He said, it was the most sense he had made in months. Sobriety suited him well. 

He looked up to him, "I'm sorry.. I ain't.. Really been there for ya. Like I shoulda been.. It ain't right." He said his hand resting on Dallas' for a moment, before he quickly pulled it away. "I was too caught up.. I mean sure I still want those fuckers dead but.. I ain't even been payin' you, or Joanna or Wayne any attention neither.. And yall are my family." He shook his head. 

"It's real fucked up."
John
Dallas would've perhaps agreed only vaguely with JD - he could cite his father as bein' a real good example of drinking too damn much. He was pretty sure there wasn't nothin', not even prohibition itself, that coulda kept his father off the bottle. However, JD was not his father, and therefor, he would've perhaps waved it off. On the other hand... Dallas had not been aware of JD's little stint at the mayor's, and for that, his eyes went wide. 

"JD, what in the hell?" He couldn't help himself, in all honesty. "What the hell were you thinkin'?" He supposed that *Was* What the alcohol did to ya. He stood up, pushing himself up from his seat with a hand on the table, and made his way to the cabinets. He pulled out the Cooper Moonshine stowed away inside, along with the few beer bottles that they'd managed to get off Dimitra Florakis a few weeks back. "I'll offload these to some old drunk," He said. "Or the very least, the speakeasy'll take 'em." He said, turning back to face JD as he lined up the bottles. 

"You ain't gotta worry 'bout me. I ain't need lookin' after." He told him, and his chest got strangely tight for reasons he couldn't quite pinpoint. "You been through hell and back, JD." Dallas crossed the kitchen to stand in front of him in his chair, looking down at him. His hand came out and laid heavy on his shoulder, squeezing just a little. "You, Joanna, and Wayne... You's all I got left." He said softly. "Can you promise me you ain't gonna do nothin' stupid on them full moons? Can you promise me that?"
Matthew
He groaned, "Well I wasn't thinkin' Dallas, that's what I'm talkin' about.." He said as he pinched the bridge of his nose, and glanced down at his feet. "Trust me, I'm embarrassed. I ain't happy about it.." He said as he leaned back to watch him. 

He shook his head, "I ain't want you to not be able to have no booze in the house cuz'a me.." He said with a frown. "I can manage.. I'll just stay away from it so you can still have it.." He said running a hand through his hair. 

As Dallas came over to him, he looked up towards him, and he glanced at the hand on his shoulder. "You have too Dallas.. You been through hell and back.. If anything you got it worse.." He said furrowing his brows. 

"Just because you don't need takin' care of, or lookin' after doesn't mean I ain't want to.." He said as he stood up, still standing close to Dallas and looking up at him. "You know.. Like you said, us, and Wayne and Joanna is what we got left.. And I ain't been very good family ta' you." He said with a hand running down his arm. "But I'm gonna do better, start lookin' after ya whether ya like it or not.." He said with a small smile. "I mean.. Given I ain't start actin' like a psycho again." 

He paused and nodded, "I promise. I ain't gonna do nothin' stupid on them full moons." He put his hand up, "Swear."
John
"I don't need booze," He told JD, and that was honest. Sometimes, he worried he might one day turn into his father. He ain't never want that - not for Wayne, if he was gonna be raisin' him. He knew what it was like to be raised by a man like that, and it never did him or Addie no good. "Best t' just get rid of it. That way, you ain't gonna want to drink it anyhow."

He was standing so close to JD, he could feel the warmth of his body radiating offa him. It made the hairs on the back of his neck stand up a little, and he cleared his throat. "You been good family. You been great family," He mumbled, and Dallas didn't know how to tell JD that he didn't see him as family like he saw Addie or Wayne or even Joanna - it was a different, scary feeling. He cared so much about JD, but not like a brother. More than a best friend. Somethin' like... Well, somethin' he ain't wanna say out loud. 

His shoulders dropped a little as JD swore to him that he wasn't gonna do nothin' stupid no more. He believed him, because when had he ever lied to Dallas? He'd known him for a while now, and he couldn't think of a single time. "You ain't gotta look after me," He started. "But... Nothin' I can do t' stop ya, huh?"
Matthew
He resigned, and shrugged his shoulders with a nod. "Fine.. I'll let ya.. But if ya end up changin' yer mind and want it around.. I want ya to have it.. I'll be real good about it. Won't even touch it." He said putting a hand up in a swear once again before letting it fall to his side. 

As Dallas insisted that he was good family, JD just took a deep breath in. He didn't really.. Well.. He didn't feel like he was, but he didn't have it much to compare it to before now. Just Joanna really. He didn't have much family outside of her and what he did have well.. It was not even close to good family. Maybe he was better than he thought even if he doubted it, with his months long stupor of walking around and grumbling about killing werewolves and not much else. 

He shook his head as he looked up at the other, "Well.. I mean.. I'll make ya a deal.. You can look after me.. Like ya been.. And I'll start doin' my part of lookin' out for ya.. Because I ain't been doin' a very good job.." He said taking in a deep breath, "Good family maybe but.. I ain't comprmisin' that I should be keepin my eye on how yer feelin'.." He said. 

When he looked up at Dallas, there were a lot of words he wished he could express to him. A lot of things he wished he could say, things boys didn't really say to each other. They were things that for small moments, JD wondered if Dallas thought too, but only for a moment before he remembered that Dallas loved him like his own kin. 

But then again, what was stopping him from saying them? The worry? The shame? The idea that Dallas would never want to talk to him again? That didn't seem likely. 

He paused, "Dallas, can I talk to you in.. In the room?" He said motioning towards the room they were currently sharing, and arching a brow.
John
He could agree to those terms. He saw nothin' wrong with that at all— he supposed they could take care of each other if JD really wanted to. Though he had to admit, he wasn't sure what JD could do for him; it wasn't like he was all that good at talkin' bout his feelings. He wasn't even good at talkin' period.

His eyes flickered from his companion to their bedroom door. The house was small; JD and Dallas had been relegated to one room, while Joanna and... *Addie* Had had to share theirs. Now it was Joanna and the baby, but sometimes Wayne got so fussy, he spent most'a nights sleepin' on Dallas' chest. He couldn't deny him that kinda thing— not with his mama gone and all. 

"Sure thing," He cleared his throat, stepped into the bedroom with him, and promptly shut the door up tight. There were two beds crammed into the space, along with a wooden dresser. That was about it, in all honesty, excerpt for little things here and there— and the gun beside Dallas' bed. 

Whatever JD wanted to talk about, had to be serious. He couldn't help but be a little nervous 'bout the whole thing, in honesty. Did he wanna move out? He hoped not. Then he'd just worry bout it more and more. "Whatsa matter?" He asked him as he took a seat on the edge of his own bed.
Matthew
He felt his palms sweating, and he couldn't help but wonder if he should drop it here. Tell him some random thing and walk out of the house, deal with the aftermath of his strange behavior later. 

When Dallas sat, he shook his head, "It ain't.. Exactly somethin' wrong.. It is a little bit more... I don't know.. Complicated.. Than that.." He said as he scratched the back of his neck. 

He took a seat on the edge of his own bed, but turned to face Dallas, looking down at his hands and fidgeting with them as he spoke. "Now.. I haven't.. I mean.." Fuck, could he even do this? Should he even do this? "At.. Any point if you understand what I'm sayin'.. And you want me ta' stop talkin'.. I won't be mad none... I'd rather you stop me 'fore I make things too uncomfortable.." 

"I haven't.. I wasn't gonna say nothin'.. Seein' as.. I was scared you ain't like what I got ta say.. And I ain't blame ya if I didn't.. But we ain't guaranteed no tomorrows no more.. You know.. Like I don't know when some day might be the last one I see ya.. And so.. I wanted to tell ya somethin'.." He knew he was drawing this out too long but God Damn, how was he supposed to say this? 

"I wanted you ta know that I love ya.." And he thought about ending it there, at an awkward I love you that could easily mean in the obvious way of frendship or family. But he didn't, he decided to keep going, and push through. "But.. I ain't love you like.. One man.. Usually loves another man.. Like.. I ain't love you like.. A brother or a friend.. I love you like.. A man.. Loves a woman.." He said clearing his throat, as he kept his eyes glued on his hands.

"I know that ain't.. Right.. But.. I do.. And I have for a long time.. I ain't really planned on ever tellin' you but.. You know.. I am scared I will die.. And I ain't never told you and then.. Wherever I go.. Heaven or Hell, I would regret.. Not tellin' you.." He said as he chewed on his lip for a minute. 

"You ain't really even gotta say nothin' back.. I know this is uncomfortable to hear.. But it's the truth.. I can't help it.. You are.. The most amazin' man I ever met.. I think yer real handsome, and real kind.. And funny, and sweet.. And you make me feel real cared about.. I ain't think there is anyone in Briar Ridge.. Or really the world as special as you.. And even if you ain't never wanna hear from me again, I think you should know how amazin' you are.. Because it's.. You are.. Yer.. Like.. Don't know.. Perfect. And I'm real scared of losin' you.. Over.. This.. Or somethin' else.. But I just can't act like I ain't feel that way no more.. I mean.. I ain't gonna bring it up none, but.. I ain't feel like I can hold it in, knowing next moon I could die.. Or.." He trailed off and shook his head, "And then I ain't ever old you.. How much.. You mean ta me." He said with a nod. 

"I'm sorry.. Dallas, I know this prolly ain't.. Yer favorite thing ta' hear but hopefully at least ya know.. You can.. Take note of how amazin' I think you are.. Maybe you can see it yerself sometimes because I ain't think you give yerself nearly enough credit for it."
John
Dallas put his elbows on his knees, resting on them for now, and he could see plainly that JD was filled with a nervous energy. He couldn't help but wanna tell JD that everything was okay. Whatever he said, wouldn't change nothin' about how Dallas felt about him. 

He felt his heart stop for what felt like a full minute. He wasn't quite sure he was livin', and it felt like his ears were about full of cicadas singing in his ears. JD was talkin', but he wasn't sure he was hearin' it all. He was staring right through JD, eyebrows raised, and after a moment, the noise of the world slowly filtered back in. 

*You ain't really even gotta say nothin' back...* 

He sat up a little more, and JD was still stumbling over his words, because JD really thought that this kind thing would *Upset* Him? No, no, never. 

Dallas stood up. He was never so good with words, he had always been far better with actions. He had always struggle to be as articulate as others, and often times, he found himself feelin' real stupid. Everybody else could wax on like they was readin' poetry, but Dallas often fumbled over his own tongue. But JD never made him feel stupid. Not ever, not even once. JD had been there for him through Addie, through the fire at the lumber yard, through even the death of his pa. 

JD was handsome, he was smart, he was hard working and he was his best friend. For so long, he'd even denied that— he didn't think that JD could possibly be his friend because he was his boss. But it didn't seem to really matter, did it? Cuz JD was his friend, and even more than that, JD loved him like he loved him back, and it felt like all the blood was rushing to his ears. 

"Don't pologize," He mumbled, and he pulled JD into a real tight hug. "You ain't got nothin' to be sorry for." Dallas promised softly. "Nothin' at all."
Matthew
JD was admittedly pretty nervous when Dallas stood up, and he watched him move closer. He swallowed hard, he wasn't sure exactly what Dallas was going to say, or do but.. He figured whatever it was he deserved it. This was at the end of the day, probably, a bad idea. 

He took in a deep breath, but was more than plesantly surprised when he felt arms around him instead. He blinked a few times, taken aback by the action before he let his own arms move around him, and he took in a deep breath. 

"I ain't?" He asked with furrowed brows. He took a moment, and he was quiet, holding onto the other tightly. He buried his face in his shoulder, and decided he could stay like that for the rest of his life if he was allowed, though it wasn't really likely since.. The had jobs and responsibilities. 

He finally pulled away a little bit, and his hand moved up to Dallas cheek, he wanted to kiss him but.. Honestly he wasn't sure if that was a mutual feeling or if the other was just comforting him. 

"I ain't know what yer feelin'.. Right now.. Really.. But I'd really like ta kiss ya.. If yer feelin'.. How I'm feelin'.." He said as he slowly moved the hand from Dallas' cheek to the back of his neck. 

"If you don't want me to, I won't though.." He said as he look up at him, and leaned in to press his lips against Dallas' if he was willing.
John
Honestly, this might've been more frightenin' than staring down a haint in the woods, or shooting a werewolf barrelin' towards ya. This was about as scary as something could get, wasn't it? Dallas was havin' to come to terms with a lot of stuff real damn fast, and he felt like his chest might explode. 

He would've been wholly content to let JD stay right there forever. Maybe here, in this room, they could pretend everything else wasn't goin' on. No dead sisters, no werewolves, no lumber yard. Maybe for just a minute, they could pretend that whatever *This* All was... Wasn't so damn confusing and scary. 

His grip around JD tightened up and he let out a rush of breath. When they pulled back a little, and he felt JD's hand on his cheek, he felt himself get all flustered all over again. His breath felt stuck in his throat and his eyes shot down to stare at the space between their chests; of which there was hardly any. 

"I ain't ever kissed before," He told JD in confidentiality. How was he 27 years old and had never kissed nobody? Well, bein' as shy as he was, it wasn't so unheard of. But JD was so close and he was leanin' in all close, and Dallas quickly shut his eyes before their mouths touched. 

It was a little strange, a little awkward, but it was a work in progress. He didn't know where to put his hands, so he kept them on his waist. He figured JD musta had a lot of lady friends, because he was a good kisser. Or maybe he just had real low standards for kissing, so just about any kiss woulda been amazing to him. Who knew? 

When they broke the kiss after a moment, he exhaled and realized his hands were shaking. "That was nice," He managed so softly.
Matthew
JD nodded as Dallas spoke, he was both surprised and not surprised really. Dallas was a very handsome man, that was where the surprise cam in, but he was also very shy. JD knew that. He wasn't much of a talker, and even less of a socializer. He was beyond grateful for working with him, because he was sure they would have never spoken otherwise. 

"That's okay." He said before there lips met. When they did, JD felt his cheeks light up. He had kissed before, sure but this was much different than his other experiences. He had expected it to be, really. His thumb rubbed gently against the back of Dallas' neck as they kissed. 

Part of him wondered if he would wake up from a dream any second, finding out he was in fact still asleep but that didn't happen. He hoped if it did it wouldn't be for a very long time. 

He wanted to stay here in this world where Dallas didn't recoil at his confession for as long as possible. 

When their lips parted, and Dallas commented, he nodded. "It was.. Real nice.. Yer a good kisser." He said, swallowing as he slowly pulled away a bit more but still close to him. "Thank ya.. For.. Lettin' me." He said taking in a deep breath., taking the other's hands in his as he felt them shake and giving them a squeeze. 

"I just.. I wanted you ta' know just how.. Much I care about ya."
John
It really did feel like a dream. It was nice, to have a dream when all that had been happenin' these days was somethin' outta a nightmare. Dallas wondered if he was sleepin', cuz he couldn't imagine nothin' beautiful comin' outta Briar Ridge... Maybe 'cept a dead werewolf. That was about second on the list of good things, right after kissin' JD Monroe. 

He tasted like sleep, and Dallas decided that he didn't mind it one bit. JD's hands were softer than his, less calloused. They were strong, yeah, but they didn't have all the scars he did. All them years of rigorous yardwork on the farm had done a number on him, but JD didn't seem to mind one bit, his hand tucked away all safe in his palm like that. 

Here, for a long moment, Dallas felt like he could just wrap his arms up around JD and keep him safe from anything. Werewolves, haints, whatever came their way. Maybe it was the euphoria of havin' a first kiss, but Dallas sure did feel like he could prolly lift the moon and the stars up in the sky if JD asked. 

"I care about ya too," He managed, and his hands were still shaking, and he realized how much emotion he was holdin' in. Euphoria, pain, grief, and love. It was love, deep down in his belly, swirlin' like current in the river on a rainy day. "More than y' could know, honest."
Matthew
He pulled the other's hands close to him as he spoke, holding hem to his chest as the other continued to shake. He knew Dallas must be nervous, if not from the shaking hands then the way he looked at him. He held them tightly, and took in a deep breath. 

"That ain't true.. I can imagine it plenty.. You ain't read my mind.. I care bout you a whole lot.." He said as he reached up one hand to brush some hair from the other's face while keeping his hand wrapped around the other two. 

"I'm real nervous.. Real scared about what's been happenin'.. What's gonna come but.. I know fer sure that whatever it is I wanna.. I wanna be with you when it happens.." He said, and admittedly he was nervous about what had been happening in Briar Ridge and whether or not he would even live to have a future with Dallas but... 

"I ain't.. Expectin'.. Nothin'.. If bein'.. With me ain't somethin' you want.. I mean I know.. I mean.. You know.. I ain't.. I ain't been myself lately but.. You know.." He looked up at her. 

"I promise ta' try.. And be uh.. Ta' try and not.. Be so.. Crazy.." He said clearing his throat.
John
"Y'don't gotta be scared," He told JD, and the hands that were clasped in JD's suddenly tightened up around his one. "I ain't gonna let nobody hurt ya. And nobody is gonna lay a hand on Joanna, or Wayne, not ever again. I ain't been nearly careful enough, but I promise..." He squeezed his hands in his. "I ain't gonna fuck it all up this time." 

He had let Addie get hurt, but he wouldn't let it happen again. One death was enough on his watch - never again. He wouldn't let JD get hurt, and nobody else in their strange little family was gonna get hurt. "You don't gotta try and be nothin' for nobody. You don't gotta be nobody but yerself, JD." 

He loved this man, and everything that came with him, too. Even if he was a little off his rocker. "Just don't go gettin' yerself in no extra trouble." Like takin' werewolf puppies or nothin'. "But bein' with ya is somethin' I want. I want it real bad." His thumb rubbed across his knuckles tenderly, and he swallowed. "If that's somethin' yer wantin'."
Matthew
He shook his head as Dallas spoke and looked down. In the end, he knew that Dallas had very little control when it was all said and done. He was doing the best he could, and his best was great but he also knew that death was filling Briar Ridge and it was always a worry. 

"You ain't fuck nothin' up.. It ain't yer fault Dallas.." He said coming one hand through his hair. "You should know that.. This place.. It ain't easy to control.." He said as he looked up to him for a moment. 

He took in his words about just being himself, but.. He knew maybe he should still work towards.. Not being so crazy. Sometimes he was good and then sometimes.. Nightmares kept him up for days. The drinking didn't help so maybe.. Stopping that would fix him up real good. 

"I ain't gonna get in trouble.. I promise.. I'll be real good." He said as his cheeks went red and he slowly nodded. "That's somethin' I want real bad.. More than anythin'. I been wantin' it a long while."
John
As much as JD tried to reassure him (and he did so, often), Dallas knew he had, in fact, fucked it up once before. He had let Addie get hurt. Why hadn't he been there with her? Why had he ever let her outta his sight, especially on a full moon? Sometimes, he got mad thinkin' about it. Why did nobody try and save her? Did they all just stand and stare at her? Was that it? 

But Dallas needed to be calm. He took a deep breath and put his chin on JD's head, before he squeezed his hands again. He was pulling him in closer until he was nestled snugly in his chest, and Dallas could feel JD's heart slamming, even through all their layers. "I been wantin' it too," He mumbled to himself softly. They both wanted this more than anything - and he hoped they got it. "Guess... That means we ought then," He mumbled. How did this work? Did they hug after? Kiss? Shake hands? 

He pulled back enough to look at JD's face, his arms still around his waist. "I gotta admit now, that I ain't ever... Been kissed." He mumbled. "So please, don't... Think bad of me cuz of it."