conversations.from: system
conversations.value: Captain Invincible is the strongest hero in all of Prosperity, Kansas. He can fly, he has x-ray vision and he can shrug a bullet off like it's nobody's business.
  
  But this isn't a story about Captain Invincible. This is the story of the rejects, the ones who got doused in radioactive goo or went through a lab experiment, and came out the other side not with super-speed or super-strength, but with the ability to overcook food with their mind, or telepathically communicate with houseplants.
  
  Together, you are one group of friends in downtown Prosperity who has decided to form your very own "super" team, because Captain Invincible can't handle everything on his own, can he?
conversations.from: human
conversations.value: That's a one-way street! Don't go-- Nevermind, apparently.
conversations.prefix: Bad Driver:
conversations.from: gpt
conversations.value: Everything you do happens 4.2 inches to your right. Try to pick up a cup with the hand you can see? It just phases through.
  
  Put your hand 4.2 inches left of the cup and lift? Tea time.
conversations.prefix: Displaced:
conversations.from: human
conversations.value: Dirty hamburger restaurant in lower China Town. You can almost feel the rats moving sneaking around behind you.
conversations.prefix: Six Guys:
conversations.from: gpt
conversations.value: Your power is to make food slightly overcooked. 
  
  Waiter, these fries are hard and blackish-brown!
conversations.prefix: Food-Based Pyromancy:
conversations.from: human
conversations.value: Your ability is to turn into Charlie Sheen for 10 seconds. Or, more accurately - you swap places with him, wherever he is, for 10 seconds.
conversations.prefix: Charlie Sheen:
conversations.from: gpt
conversations.value: Your mind and your body are in permanent slow-motion and experience everything at about a quarter speed. This means everything appears to move four times as fast, you talk really slow with a dark voice, and any impacts will have an amplified effect (as they will seem to be coming at you 4 times faster than normal).
  
  You also cannot punch for shit.
conversations.prefix: Permanent Slow-Motion:
conversations.from: human
conversations.value: You have the ability to print a photo of whatever you're looking at, but it comes out... somewhere less than pleasant.
  
  
   
   
  (Completely stolen from http://superuseless.blogspot.se/2010/01/polarrhoids.html)
conversations.prefix: Polarrhoids:
conversations.from: gpt
conversations.value: You have the power to teleport yourself anywhere in the world - provided you move to the exact opposite spot first.
  
  When you trigger your power, you will appear on the exact antipode of wherever you're currently standing. For most of the US, this happens to be the indian ocean.
conversations.prefix: Antipode-portation:
conversations.from: human
conversations.value: Whenever you sleep or are otherwise unconscious, you grow to four times your size over the span of 5 minutes. The same process happens in reverse once you wake up.
conversations.prefix: Narco-Gigantism:
conversations.from: gpt
conversations.value: It's as if someone put you in photoshop and set the opacity slider to 85%.
conversations.prefix: Slightly transparent:
conversations.from: human
conversations.value: The drunker you are, the stronger your mind control is. Have a beer? Remote control a fly.
  Down 15 jägerbombs? Make everyone dance, then pass out.
conversations.prefix: Alcoholic Mind Control:
conversations.from: gpt
conversations.value: Any and all sentences uttered by you have a thick layer of sarcastic butter spread on them.
  
  This might not be a superpower so much as the result of a stroke.
conversations.prefix: Forced sarcasm:
conversations.from: human
conversations.value: Pray to god that nobody fires any guns in your vicinity, because those bullets are going to come your way.
conversations.prefix: Bullet Magnet:
conversations.from: gpt
conversations.value: You're likely to notice details that nobody else does.
  
  "Hey! That robber guy just snuck out through the bathroom! And he was wearing green socks!"
conversations.prefix: Observant:
conversations.from: human
conversations.value: You're so smooth, you could talk a cop into giving you a ride home instead of giving you a ticket.
conversations.prefix: Smooth-talker:
conversations.from: gpt
conversations.value: Catch! You won't be blocking a sword with your hand, but you might be able to catch that grenade and throw it back before it explodes.
conversations.prefix: Quick reflexes:
conversations.from: human
conversations.value: You're great at puns. Like, stupid great. So great, you seem to be able to use them to your advantage in all sorts of situations where you really wouldn't expect them to work.
conversations.prefix: Pun-ventive:
conversations.from: gpt
conversations.value: "It's a Unix system! I know this!"
  
  Whether a cellphone or laptop, TV or a hi-fi system from the 80s, you can probably diagnose it, fix it and maybe even hack it.
conversations.prefix: Technophile:
conversations.from: human
conversations.value: Always the right tool for the right situation, whether a shovel for digging or a mouse-trap for mouse-trapping.
conversations.prefix: Well-equipped:
conversations.from: gpt
conversations.value: You're an orange belt in Karate. That's pretty good, right?
conversations.prefix: Martial Arts Practitioner:
conversations.from: human
conversations.value: It's not a real car if it doesn't have a stick.
  
  You're able to take hand-brake turns like nobody's business while outrunning three cars full of thugs firing their guns at you.
conversations.prefix: Badass Driver:
conversations.from: gpt
conversations.value: You were born with two left feet and bad fine motor skills.
conversations.prefix: Clumsy:
conversations.from: human
conversations.value: ... I can't wait any more! Those thugs need a beating, RIGHT THIS SECOND.
conversations.prefix: Overeager:
conversations.from: gpt
conversations.value: Some guy took off your right arm. Using stuff is a lot harder like this.
conversations.prefix: Amputee:
conversations.from: human
conversations.value: Keep your hands in the air, and don't mo-- Oh, what's that?
conversations.prefix: Easily Distracted:
conversations.from: gpt
conversations.value: To get to YouTube, you first type "google" into Bing, then "youtube" into Google, and click that link.
conversations.prefix: Technophobe:
conversations.from: human
conversations.value: You just don't see what kind of harm those four gunmen could possibly do to someone as skilled as yourself.
conversations.prefix: Brave, or stupid?:
conversations.from: gpt
conversations.value: These people are not my team - they're my sidekicks, and _**I'm**_ the hero.
conversations.prefix: Show-off:
conversations.from: human
conversations.value: I can't do it! There's too many guns! Too many things could go wrong and I don't want to die oh god oh god oh god
conversations.prefix: Coward:
conversations.from: gpt
conversations.value: Captain Invincible, step aside. This guy is gonna be the new hero on the block.
conversations.prefix: Fame:
conversations.from: human
conversations.value: What that _villain_ did to your family can never be forgiven. It's time for a good-old fashioned beatdown.
conversations.prefix: Revenge:
conversations.from: gpt
conversations.value: Stealing from thieves and criminals isn't _really_ stealing, right? You need this more than they do.
conversations.prefix: Shiny loot:
conversations.from: human
conversations.value: The basic ingredient of any great hero. There is no way you're going to stand by while those thugs beat up that helpless man.
conversations.prefix: Protect the innocent:
conversations.from: gpt
conversations.value: If the hostage dies, but so do 10 thugs, that's okay, right? As long as it's all for the greater good.
conversations.prefix: The greater good:
conversations.from: human
conversations.value: It's really hard to focus with all these skeletons walking around.
conversations.prefix: Permanent X-Ray Vision:
conversations.from: gpt
conversations.value: Technology more advanced than anything from the 50s seems to break down from just being near you. This stops you from having anything more advanced than a watch on you.
conversations.prefix: Technologic Destruction:
conversations.from: human
conversations.value: You can pull off your hands and then, uh... throw them at people, I guess. They're reattachable, too.
conversations.prefix: Detachable hands:
conversations.from: gpt
conversations.value: Robbing a burger store? Really? It's like he's got nothing better to do.
conversations.prefix: Robber:
conversations.from: human
conversations.value: Unconscious telekinesis can be a powerful blessing, but when you hate yourself, though, it becomes a lethal curse. Bullets, rocks, falling cars, meteors - if it moves ballistically, it's going to hit you.
conversations.prefix: Bullet Magnet:
conversations.from: gpt
conversations.value: Festooned around your body are pouches and carrying pockets and straps, all filled with... things. Sometimes the right thing, even.
conversations.prefix: Well-equipped:
conversations.from: human
conversations.prefix: Wild:
conversations.from: gpt
conversations.value: It's hard to move at all in two hundred pounds of mismatched improvised armour. It's even harder to move quickly.
conversations.prefix: Clumsy:
conversations.from: human
conversations.prefix: Wild:
conversations.from: gpt
conversations.value: _What I have done, I cannot forget, and you must not forgive._
  
  You performed a deed so heinous that it haunts you to this day. That marked a turning point in your life, and you are driven to right the wrong you have wrought.
conversations.prefix: Atone:
conversations.from: human
conversations.prefix: Wild:
conversations.from: gpt
conversations.prefix: Wild:
conversations.from: human
conversations.value: On your 10th birthday you began to notice your shadow behaving oddly.. changing and morphing.
  
  That's right, you have the power to shapeshift! ...your shadow.
conversations.prefix: Shadowbender:
conversations.from: gpt
conversations.prefix: Wild:
conversations.from: human
conversations.value: The darkness in your heart fights tooth and nail against the light you show the world.
conversations.prefix: Evil Temptations:
conversations.from: gpt
conversations.prefix: Wild:
conversations.from: human
conversations.value: All your family were the best of the best.
  
  Super-super heroes, what are you, some weirdo?
conversations.prefix: Following in the Family Footsteps:
conversations.from: gpt
conversations.value: By emitting a psionic pulse, you can force anybody to perceive an object in a different colour. Doesn't work against electronics like cameras, or people wearing helmets, glasses, or tinfoil hats.
conversations.prefix: Hue Shift:
conversations.from: human
conversations.prefix: Wild:
conversations.from: gpt
conversations.prefix: Wild: