conversations: human
conversations:  Previously on Wanted  
  
  Our heroes were tempted by a mysteriously nefarious villain named The Weasel King to a trial to see who is worthy of becoming his nemesis. Surely his communist plots would be no good for the great and capitalist Typalia! His true intentions must be discovered and stopped. Our heroes walk into what is very clearly a trap he has prepared for them in the depths of an abandoned office building in old town. Will they survive the horrors waiting for them below?! Will they discover the evil plot?! And most importantly will they find out what is up with Timmy the Blind Omniscient Hot Dog Man on 10th street who loses his dog every Tuesday at the exact same time?! Why can't he see that coming!?
  
  
   
  
  
  The oppressively and altogether dangerously dark steps went down much further than would be expected from a supposedly abandoned building. Finally they leveled out on a flat metal surface, almost immediately illuminated by floodlights embedded in the walls. The room was horrifying. Red Polka dots on white walls and neon orange floor with solely a steel door at the other end and a loudspeaker above it. The loudspeaker stopped blaring out what sounded like elevator music as the lights came up and the heroes fanned across the room.  "Greetings my fellow Novas! Tis I, The Magnificent Lord of all that is Weasel and Weasel kind. You have found my first task as was expected. Inside will be a bevy of deadly traps, water temples and block puzzles to test your skills and ultimately your patience with inane tasks! At the end, you shall find clues as to my next task, and if you are inordinately lucky, a glimpse of my royal visage to brighten your day! To begin you must walk through the door in front of you! But beware, one of the most vicious deterrents to have ever emerged from history guards that door. It is locked and I have destroyed the key! Good luck foolishly feeble foes of...."  there was some incomprehensible sputtering as the alliteration hesitated  "...feeebleness!"  With that the mic was turned off and elevator music again filled the room.
conversations: Dante Falcon:
conversations: human
conversations:  Southpaw looks through her mask at the others gathered with her.    "Is... is this serious?   Deathtraps?   Does he think he's the riddler or something?"   The small costumed nova scratched her head.   "are you guys in on this?   Is this some show my agent put me on to get pranked on TV?   like a nova version of Punk'd.    Is Asthon Kutcher gonna jump out when the doors open?" 
conversations: Kell_tamer:
conversations: human
conversations:  Event Horizon is in her full bank-robbing garb, mask hiked up and hat pulled low. Wise precaution if they  were  in fact on television. Mysterious Teenage Boy was ready to kick some ass. Who knows. Maybe BB would get ganked, and she could go back to her normal life... of crime. Horizon shrugs in response to Southpaw's question, shaking her head.
conversations: JonRG:
conversations: human
conversations:  Synapse looks around the room after hearing the message of the Weasel King.
  
   "I'd say less Riddler and more Joker.  But y'know, the 1960's version." 
  
  She flashes her winning smile.
  
   "So, I'll go first?" 
  
  She steps towards the door, her eyes peeled for danger.  At any sign, she readies herself to teleport back.
conversations: josienoms:
conversations: human
conversations:  "Go ahead. This is going to be silly enough. Me? I'm waiting to see if there's a credible threat here." 
  
  Paragon was already running a wristwatch computer program, there were puzzles ahead and she managed to get a brief glimpse of them. She wanted to get a head start on solving those, and this sure was a good time to do it.
  
  It was kinda like playing a cellphone game of bejeweled while in the waiting room, honestly.
conversations: Epinephrine_Syn:
conversations: human
conversations:  South looks up at Synapse.   "If you want, thats fine.   if anything is dangerous though let me take point?   Don't know the extent of everyone's powers here but I can turn to steel."     She didn't want to come off as condescending and was genuinely sounding like she'd rather avoid people getting hurt.
conversations: Kell_tamer:
conversations: human
conversations:  Run fast.  Think faster.  Doesn't do anyone in the world a damn bit of good to be faster then a bullet if you can't be smarter then the guy with the gun.  Power works on every part of you, even the brain.   Right.  Like the old man said.  You've got the speed to take your time.  So.  Door.  Fiendish trap.  Whatever it was.  Faster then the blur?  Probably not.  So take your shot.  Easy.  Trap would trigger before the door.  So get to the door.  If nothing happens... That's Southpaw.  Strength.  Durable.  Battering ram in a pint sized can.  Alright.  On three.
   "3." 
  Letting a little of his power out Alex jogs to the other side of the room in a fraction of a moment.  Raps his knuckles on the door, appreciating the solid weight of the steel.  Zips back to the waiting heroes.  Waits a few seconds for the traps to go off.
   "Southpaw.  I need a can opener.  You want a ride there or...?" 
conversations: Obscurejones:
conversations: human
conversations:  South looks at Alex.   "If you are offering.   Works for me." 
conversations: Kell_tamer:
conversations: human
conversations:  Delta-V finally manages to stifle her laughter. Mostly. " Oh man " she giggles, " this is going to be  hi-lar-ious . I haven't seen that much camp since the last pride parade ".
  
  " Want me to make it a really  fast  can opener? "
conversations: Tome:
conversations: human
conversations:  "Delta-V... Modified fastball?  I run to the door at full speed, at the last second you pump my speed into Southpaw?  Basically turn her into a depleted uranium rail gun." 
conversations: Obscurejones:
conversations: human
conversations:  " Go for it " she answers happily, the blue nimbus arcing between her outstretched fingers reflecting off of her goggles. " Let's make some noise little sis ".
conversations: Tome:
conversations: human
conversations:  South nods and preps for a high speed impact.  Her bare left fist extended in front of her ready for an incredible penatration.
conversations: Kell_tamer:
conversations: human
conversations:  "Time to make the donuts."
   Taking the steps two at a time, Blur gets as far as a running start as he can and then hurls himself at break neck, and hopefully break steel , speed at the door.
conversations: Obscurejones:
conversations: human
conversations:  A twitch of her half-gloved fingers and the cherenkov light playing about Delta-V whips itself into a segmented ring, cycling about her. " Hope you're ready, pintsize! "
  
   
   Spoiler 
  Using Momentum Swap to switch Blur and Southpaw's momentum. Needs 1 sux to go off.
  
  Wits 5 + Momentum Control 3  (8d10)[ 8 ][ 7 ][ 5 ][ 6 ][ 5 ][ 3 ][ 1 ][ 4 ](39) 
  Mega-Wits 1  (1d10)[ 4 ](4) 
   
conversations: Tome:
conversations: human
conversations:  Synapse yelps and teleports a few feet out of the way.
  
   "Hey!  Watch where you're going!   I  was gonna open the door." 
  
  She crosses her arms and pouts.
conversations: josienoms:
conversations: human
conversations:  "See, this is why I let y'all deal with this door. I've got other doors to unlock."  Paragon was smiling, but also looking a little smug as she strode towards the Weasel King's door.  " 's why one of the most useful skills is knowing when to step to the side. So, Rat Prince!"  Suddenly shouting upwards to where his voice came from.  "Y'sure about this? This is like, a lot of us and one of you. Y'got any kind of friends?" 
conversations: Epinephrine_Syn:
conversations: human
conversations:  "Oh, is that what we're doing now?  Cause that seems like a spectacularly bad idea.  Tempting fate there a bit, Paragon.  This is the part where he reveals his army of were-weasels, or whatever." 
conversations: josienoms:
conversations: human
conversations:  "Honestly, yeah. I 'want' something a little more than a locked door. Can you imagine the embarrassment if we all came all this way, and it turned out to just be a homeless guy in a getup he stole from the high school theater? Right now my biggest worry is that there 'won't' be a problem." 
conversations: Epinephrine_Syn:
conversations: human
conversations:  Horizon rubs her thumb and index finger together to form the tiniest, quietest violin.
conversations: JonRG:
conversations: human
conversations:  Southpaw at one point saw a door. Then there was no door, more a crumpled piece of steel that fell down a ravine. Problem 2: There was a large ravine below her that she was sailing over. With the grace of a swan with two broken wings....... And legs she landed face first on the other side, sliding through the ground leaving a trough of dirt before slowing grinding to a stop. A sign popped out of the wooden floor next to her with the words "28 Meters." Inexplicably the only dirt floor was exactly in the trough that Southpaw slid in.
  
  The room in question had a disco ball on the ceiling, constantly strobing and half illuminating the 10 foot wide Ravine with no obvious bottom in the room. The steel door remains apparently fell down it, but nothing was heard from it just yet. Over loud speaker only one sentence was proclaimed.  "I HEARD THAT CURTIS!" 
conversations: Dante Falcon:
conversations: human
conversations:  South holds up her hand gives a thumbs up.   Then her finger points up to the sky.  "I got that reference..." 
conversations: Kell_tamer:
conversations: human
conversations:  "Donuts successfully made, and then promptly used to defeat a dastardly door of doom.  So they'd be dastardly door of doom defeating donuts." 
  The Black Blur strikes a heroic pose, hands on his hips, legs akimbo.
   "And that's how you alliterate, you overblown rodent!" 
conversations: Obscurejones:
conversations: human
conversations:  Veronica peers over the edge into the abyss.
  
  " Anyone heard an impact yet? Because I'm wondering how he got a actual bottomless pit going ".
conversations: Tome:
conversations: human
conversations:  Synapse vanishes in a flash of crackling electricity, her teleport marked by the smell of ozone and the sound of thunder.  She stands on the other side of the chasm, and offers to help Southpaw to her feet.
  
   "C'mon, you're making us look dumb." 
  
  She grins, playfully.
conversations: josienoms:
conversations: human
conversations:  South dusts off.    "I'm just curious how he knew that we were gonna wind up like this with a long jump sign and whatnot..." 
  
  She takes a look around the room
conversations: Kell_tamer:
conversations: human
conversations:  Outside of the (bottomless?) ravine and disco ball continuing to strobe the room, it was otherwise very plain, in stark contrast to the ugliness of the previous room. Wood boards served as the majority of the floor outside of the one path that South paved with her face and the sign with it. On the far side, with South and Synapse was a staircase carved from the stone descending further down with an orange glow lighting up the bottom, though the source of the glow was unknown.
  
  The ravine was roughly ten feet wide at its narrowest and didn't seem to have any path that could be used to get around it, nor any materials around to make a bridge. Clearly the most cunning of obstacles.
  
   "My methods of creating pits is beyond your comprehension puny hero! You shall never know my secrets, and in fact it is so complicated that I will give you some advice. You're just going to have to accept this and move on."  The loudspeaker was apparently hidden, unfortunately protecting it from any hero who might decide they want to stop the taunting.
conversations: Dante Falcon:
conversations: human
conversations:  South makes her way to the staircase and glances down it.   "He knows what weasel's aren't typically in any position to taunt people based on how puny they are right?" 
  
  She figures what the hell,  head toward the glowing.
conversations: Kell_tamer:
conversations: human
conversations:  "I'm pretty sure he exactly understands that."  Paragon followed at the back of the pack, patiently observing and fiddling with that phone.
  
   "Why are you talking as if that's a reason he wouldn't gloat here? He feels big and powerful in his lair, somebody with a size inferiority complex would 'obviously' take the chance to gloat and boast their size. I'll be checkin for other traps, and by the way I'm pretty sure the bottomless pit is caused by 'sound proofing at the bottom'. Least that's one way to do it." 
conversations: Epinephrine_Syn:
conversations: human
conversations:  "...I'm not sure I care for you."
   The Blur turns to his loyal sidekick and gestures to the pit.
   "Float us all?" 
conversations: Obscurejones:
conversations: human
conversations:  Horizon shakes her head, but a look from Alex is enough to quash her hopes of escape. Her shoulders sag. With a little sigh, she calls upon the power of gravity. Then they all float over to the other side
conversations: JonRG:
conversations: human
conversations:  "Delta, be a dear and keep an eye on my sidekick."
   Setting his feet Blur shoots down towards the glow at top speed.
conversations: Obscurejones:
conversations: human
conversations:  Horizon glares at Delta until her eyes are mere slits.
conversations: JonRG:
conversations: human
conversations:  The staircase led to a massive open cavern lit by -- what certainly appeared to be -- a floor made of lava. The landing put the aspiring heroes on a metal grate suspended above the lava roiling below. Impossibly, the room actually felt quite cool. The exit wasn't anywhere in sight, however the grating was suspended to a set of tracks on the ceiling and a panel sat on it, probably intended to move the track.
  
   "Okay, I'll admit it before phone hacker Snowden there figures it out herself and ruins the surprise. Also if your name isn't Snowden it really should be. That's not actually lava, it just looks like it. You would not believe how expensive it would be to fill this room with lava and keep it that way. BUT THE ROOM YOU ARE STANDING IN IS THE EPITOME OF GENIUS! AN ALMOST FULLY AUTOMATED DEATHTRAP! FOR ONCE YOU PRESS THAT BUTTON YOU WILL BEGIN YOUR JOURNEY THROUGH THE CAVERN AND MUST AVOID OR FIGHT ALL THAT OPPOSES YOU ON THE ROUTE! AND THE FIRST PERSON TO CALL THIS AN ELEVATOR FIGHT FROM A VIDEO GAME WILL GET UNCEREMONIOUSLY BOOTED BECAUSE NOT COOL!" 
  
  That lava certainly looked real at least.
conversations: Dante Falcon:
conversations: human
conversations:  "I like the texture of the lava, you're going to have to tell me how you did it sometime. I like the aesthetic. Regardless, I'm not going to call this an elevator, it's  clearly  a dumbwaiter." 
  
  There was a moment of pause, as Paragon assessed the room, and smiled something wicked.  "So, raise your hand if you're up for figuring out a way to get down there without pressing the button and triggering the Cutscene Event? Or do y'all wanna play this straight and smash his stuff up front?" 
conversations: Epinephrine_Syn:
conversations: human
conversations:  "People still use elevators?" 
  
  Synapse shrugs and spreads her hands.
  
   "Everyone wanna hold hands and see if I can't get you all there at once?" 
conversations: josienoms:
conversations: human
conversations:  "We also have someone who can negate gravity.  Which... I mean, flight.  Whoosh, so on and so forth." 
conversations: Obscurejones:
conversations: human
conversations:  Synsapse rolls her eyes.
  
   "That's not flying.  It's falling with style." 
conversations: josienoms:
conversations: human
conversations:  South looks up to where the speakers are.  "I mean....   if its against robots or something i don't mind fighting...  but if its henchmen,  would really rather they are able to get home without broken... everything."    She looks to the rest.   "I suppose a shortcut would help though make sure..."    She takes Synapse's hand.
conversations: Kell_tamer: